Our criminal Einstein of the week

“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.” — Albert Einstein

227 Sandy Springs Place: Subject entered Kroger store and apparently did not see the two marked patrol cars parked outside. He ran from store without paying for a $3.50 turkey sandwich.

He was apprehended by deli clerk and arrested. Subject had $51 in his pockets and advised that money was for the lottery. He stated “you have to be in it to win it.”

More Einsteins

1050 Hammond Drive: Just after 4 p.m. a patrol officer spotted a car driving erratically near the parking area of the Publix Store on Hammond and Peachtree Dunwoody Road. He followed the car to the parking area of the Homestead Suites. The car continued to drive erratically based on the fact that it jumped the curb, hit a concrete pillar and then an iron fence. A woman got out of the car, showing a fresh bruise under her eye and a red mark across the bridge of her nose. She was also on the phone.

Over the next minute or so, the officer had to tell the woman to get off of the phone several times. She was screaming into the phone at someone she said was her grandmother. EMS was called and looked at her although she refused any treatment. She said she was stressed, which is why she drove so recklessly. She was arrested for reckless driving.

4900 block of Roswell Road: Just before 11 p.m., cops were called to an apartment parking lot in reference to a disturbance. They spoke with a woman who said her boyfriend and her got into an argument and she told him to leave. He would not. She then got into her car and tried to leave but her boyfriend got on top of the car, still arguing, and would not get off. He was arrested.

What is it about men, who get really angry and sometimes drunk, that makes them want to climb on the car when arguing with the significant other? I remember answering dozens of calls at bar-parking lots. The man was on the car and arguing with the woman. This usually resulted in an arrest, and many times an arrest after the guy was released from the hospital after the woman either hit the accelerator or brake, depending on if the car was in motion.

Men: This is not a tactical advantage. First of all, if you’re arguing with your girlfriend, wife or both, then retreat. Do not climb anything. Stay firmly planted to the ground and immediately leave the area. The odds of you coming out of this winning the argument are 0%.

6200 block of Roswell Road: An officer, responding to a shoplifting call, spoke with the complainant, who told him a man walked out of the store with store merchandise and the re-entered the store again, appearing as if he were shopping. The officer detained the man and, after explaining the reason he detained him, asked if he could look in the car. The man said “no.” The officer said the car would be impounded to be held for a search warrant. The man said he could then look in the car. The officer then found the evidence, silver products totaling over $116. The man was arrested. He told the officer and store owner that he’d (now) pay for the items.

It’s funny how adults act like children when they get caught doing stupid, silly things like stealing. Only after they’re caught do they have “remorse” and offer to pay — which is what they should have done in the first place.

Among other recent reports

Dunwoody Place / North River Drive: A woman reported that two men approached her just after 5 p.m. One man pulled a gun and demanded her money. When she resisted, she was hit in the head. The suspects grabbed her purse and ran off.

5500 block of Roswell Road: A woman reported that as she arrived at her apartment, three men exited the apartment, knocking her into a closet as they rushed out. The men were apparently burglarizing the apartment when she arrived home. She was not injured. She said the burglars dropped some of her jewelry they had taken.

Waterford Place: A woman reported her laptop was missing. She said she went out and got really, really drunk. She got a ride home with a man who got mad at her for not getting more personally involved with him. She awoke in the morning to find her laptop gone.

6400 block of Roswell Road: A man reported that shortly after 1 a.m., he was at a nude dance bar sitting at a table. He said at some point, someone stole his cell phone that was sitting on the table. He contacted the club manager who reviewed the video tape, which showed a waitress picking up the man’s phone. They confronted the waitress, who fled the club after the police were called. The theft is under investigation.

Forestdale Drive: Someone removed a couple of lawn statues, valued at over $500, from the yard of the victim while he was out of town. A neighbor, who saw the theft, confronted a female, who was removing the statues. The woman, said to be in her twenties, left in a dark-colored Infiniti GX-35.

Park Avenue: A man reported that he agreed to invest some funds with another man who represented himself as an employee of a large investment company. The victim gave the man two checks for $5,000 each. Afterward, the victim began to check on the man so he called the investment company, who declined to comment on the man one way or another. The victim called the man several times with no luck. He then sent a certified letter to the man and then received a call from him. The victim said he wanted his money back. The man said he would driver to N.C. to get his check. The victim has not received his money back and fears the man never invested the money.

With so many people strapped for funds, do your homework on the front end of any agreement to invest your money. It’s a good idea anytime, but especially nowadays.

Windridge Drive: A woman said an old boyfriend came over and asked her to go out with him. She declined. When she did, he pushed her to the ground and kicked her in the stomach.

8200 block of Roswell Road: Just after midnight, cops got a call to the Chevron Station to meet with a man who said that someone attempted to carjack him. The suspect was a male dressed in dark clothing. One of the officers found a man matching that description at a nearby shopping center at Northridge and Roswell Road.

The report noted the man was very intoxicated. The man told the officer that he was cutting through the area to get to his apartment on Windridge Road. The victim said the man knocked on his window but never made an attempt to get in or rob him. The suspect and the officer went to an address where the man said he lived but the man’s door key didn’t fit the door and apparently he didn’t know where he lived. He was arrested for disorderly conduct.

10 comments Add your comment


December 31st, 2009
6:24 pm

Guys, if you want to be intimate with a woman EVER, don’t kick her in the stomach when she refuses you. You won’t have a chance with her later on, unless she is a moron.


January 1st, 2010
7:59 am

Any where on ROSWELL road is NOT a place I want to live, it’s a one road crime spree!!


January 1st, 2010
8:58 pm

I just read the report of the 4 year-old boy that was killed while at a church service just after midnight, allegedly due to a bullet fired in “celebration” of the new year. Talk about your Einsteins…idiots that fire weapons into the air just don’t understand that what goes up must come down. I dug a bullet out of the shingles on a home I once owned during inspection before replacing the roof. What will it take for people to understand the consequences of their actions? I guess I am asking too much, since we are constantly reminded of the idiocy that surrounds us. May God bless and comfort the boy’s family.


January 2nd, 2010
6:25 am

BigJake: Over the last half century or so, we have raised a lot of people who believe that it is the Governments responsibility to fix the “consequences” of their actions.

Yankee in Gooberville

January 2nd, 2010
7:41 am

Richard, over the last twenty years we’ve had a bunch of people doing their best to demonize gun control legislation, look at the resistance to closing loopholes in sales at gun shows and on ammunition. We reap what we sow…you damn right when people won’t do the right thing the government should come in!


January 2nd, 2010
8:40 am

Nowhere in my comment was there any indication that there should be any government involvement. This is a common sense issue, and obviously some people have more money than sense. I believe in being responsible for your actions, including proper ownership of guns.

P. T. Barnum

January 2nd, 2010
8:45 am

There’s a fool born every minute and I’m gonna find him/her and take advantage of that person :) The fact of the matter is folks, there’s a lot of bad, bad people out there who do not have a job and wouldn’t work if you offered them one. They’d rather steal what someone else has already worked for…..it’s easier. Ladies, if you choose to live in a high crime area, you’re probably getting what you deserve by living there…..get smart….I know that’s hard for some of you but, it might work out better. Until we start making things harder on criminals, crime’s just going to keep on rising…..what’s a slap on the wrist? Big deal….. :)


January 4th, 2010
9:04 am

I agree about the stupid men that jump on cars. That player for the Cincinnati Bengals that died in the past two weeks – his fiance was driving off and he jumped in the bed of the pickup truck and a couple blocks later he was out and on the ground dying.:(


January 4th, 2010
1:04 pm

0% chance of winning an argument with a woman? Steve, you’re so optimistic. My experience has shown that the chances are actually in the negative digits, like -100%.


February 4th, 2010
1:08 pm

I can’t get over what people will steal and how they will do it. In my neighborhood, a woman was walking around, knocking on doors and offering potted plants for sale, cheap. One of the doors she knocked on was the home from which she had stolen the plants herself, the day before. Talk about Einsteins!!