Police Blotter: Hookah smoking pipes missing

These are some, but not all, of the reports filed with Sandy Springs Police recently.

7800 block of Roswell Road: The manager of a store said that someone smashed the front glass doors and took twenty Hookah Smoking Pipes.

700 block of Hammond Drive: Someone stole some company mail and then cashed some company checks.

7700 block of Spalding Drive: The manager of a grocery store caught a woman stealing meat and Kool-Aid. He refused to prosecute her.

2200 block of Summit Springs Dr.: A man reported that two female friends were in his apartment with him. They left and after they departed, he discovered his wallet missing. He called them and told them that if they didn’t return the wallet, he could call the cops. They didn’t return it.

6100 block of Roswell Road: A man reported that his $350 BlackBerry cell phone was stolen when he got up and re-ordered his complicated-to-pronounce caffeine beverage.

Tip: Don’t assume that because your stuff is in close proximity, someone won’t walk by, snatch it, and then hit the road. Amazingly, not witnesses? You’d be surprised to see how little attention people pay to things right in front of them. Don’t provide the opportunity for these crooks.

6300 block of Roswell Road: An employee of a drug store said that during work hours, she placed her purse behind the checkout counter and later found that someone had taken it.

Tip: Here is a short list of places in the workplace that you DO NOT want to place your purse.

  • Under the work desk
  • In the work desk (unlocked)
  • In the nearest file cabinet (unlocked)
  • Behind the main counter in retail stores
  • In the break room
  • In your unlocked office desk even if in a private office

Find some location where someone would have to look for a few minutes and not within hand’s reach of where the public is allowed. In office areas, find a location such as a file drawer that you can secure with a lock or purchase a locker that you can secure with your lock in an area that is not public. Depending on where you work, remember that employees do steal from one another so the less you have out there to steal the better.

8800 block of Roswell Road: Around 2 a.m. the victim of this report said someone took his keys and then his truck. They apparently used it because he found damage to one of the bumpers. They returned the truck to the location but in a different parking space.

Monterrey Parkway: A man called the police and reported that after he let his dog out just before 2 a.m. he heard a gunshot and believed that his dog was shot. He said he saw a white male, 6-0” with a grey shirt and jeans, wearing a hat with “NY” on it run from the location. The dog was taken to a nearby animal hospital for treatment.

Glen Errol Road: A man called the police and reported that when he woke up one morning, his ex-girlfriend was standing over him. He asked her to leave and she shot him the “bird.” He said the door was unlocked when he went to sleep. Here’s the good part: The woman wanted him arrested for “disrespecting her.” Okay, I don’t even think that is the proper way that word disrespect is used is it? Maybe “being disrespectful to her?” or “not being nice?” or whatever but FYI-“disrespecting a person” is not in the criminal code.

6500 block of Roswell Road: A woman reported that another woman began cursing at her when she went out to walk the dog.

I-285 and Roswell Road: A patrol officer spotted a sports car driving on the interstate at 115 MPH. The driver of the car was stopped and charged with excessive speed and Reckless Driving. He was arrested and his sports car was impounded. Note: A fitting punishment for someone driving that out of control would be to have to drive a “Smart Car” for six months.

4900 block of Roswell Road: A grocery store manager called the police and told the officers that the store had hired a man to promote and give free samples of the store’s product to customers. The manager said the person hired to do this left early so he talked to the person. In the process, the manager found that the person had stolen a bottle of wine and some bread and concealed those items in a bag before trying to leave. The man was arrested.

People Who Don’t Get It: A woman called the police and complained that her dog groomer didn’t do a good job.

Not Your Day: Two men went to the river at Morgan Falls to launch their boat into the river. Things did not go well and they accidentally launched their trailer and Ford F-150 truck as well. Divers and fire department personnel fished the truck and trailer out some time later. No one was injured.

16 comments Add your comment


October 15th, 2009
12:29 pm

Hmmm 20 pipes get stolen then meat and kool aid, followed by 2 ladies that steal a wallet with presumably a fair amount of cash or a fake visa card(Clark Howard’s term for a debit card) and on top of that a Crackberry gets stolen. I’m no detective but here’s my theory:

Pipes are for obvious tobacco use(Yeah sure they are) the wallet was to buy the tobacco that has an odd green color to it, the meat and kool aid are obviously for some exotic dish for after smoking this odd green tobacco, and the missing Crackberry is to contact the independent distributor of the green tobacco and then possibly used for trade if there wasn’t enough money in the wallet. Just a theory. :)


October 15th, 2009
12:40 pm

@KennesawDave – Hookahs are not very great for smoking marijuana (”green tobacco”), but a nice theory nevertheless.


October 15th, 2009
12:54 pm

I’ve always wondered about that word, disrespecting. I hear it on MTV a lot and it’s usually followed by “Oh no she di-unt!” with a lot of finger waving and head tilting.


October 15th, 2009
1:17 pm

dbeg: Thanks, I thought independent distributor was a nice spin-off for a drug dealer too. :) I love this blog. It’s the best way to get a laugh and feel so much better about yourself and realize that your life doesn’t quite suck as bad as others :)


October 16th, 2009
7:58 am

KDave, depends on which side of the Stimulus you find yourself these days.


October 16th, 2009
8:35 am

Good tips about where NOT to store your valuables at work. We’ve had a rash of thefts at work over the last couple of years (once every few months, but more frequently than we’d like). The most recent involved $70 stolen from a woman’s purse kept, where else? An unlocked desk drawer. I think she had been given the keys to that desk after that.

As for the man who left his Crackberry on the counter while he got his hard-to-pronounce-and-harder-to-order-correctly caffeinated beverage, it goes back to what I said in the comments of a previous post: People who leave their valuables unattended out in plain sight deserve to have them stolen, just to show how stupid they really are.


October 16th, 2009
1:40 pm

Regarding the man whose Blackberry was stolen when he was right nearby. People who are in the vicinity and who see this happen don’t want to get involved. My daughter was in a HS Biology class and had her purse on top of her desk. During the lab portion of class, with everyone just feet away from each other, one of the boys in the class WENT INTO HER PURSE and stole her phone. How? Easy. He waited until she was physically and mentally immersed in her lab work and not paying attention. Anyone who saw him was too scared to say anything. She noticed it was gone right away (and was lectured by mom for even thinking about looking at her cell phone during class). The classroom was searched by SRO and school administrators, kids were questioned and nobody knew anything about it. Since we had insurance on the phone and it had made our lives so much easier with practices after school, etc., we got another phone.

The next week while in the same class she put her purse under her desk with the new phone buried deep within it, figuring if someone had to dig for it, with everyone in the classroom, they woudln’t want to take the time to do so and risk getting caught. (Before you ask, she didn’t have a locker in H.S. after her freshman year. #1 we had to pay for it and #2 with only four minutes between classes, going to it and making it to the next class on time was impossible.) Yep, you guessed it. Same bat-time, same bat-channel. The kid did it AGAIN. This time someone HAD to see him because of the logistics of where the purse sat and where the phone was in the purse. Once again classroom searched, questions asked, not one word said.

How’d he finally get arrested? The dumb girl he gave the phone to left the super bright hot pink case on it which I had bought for my daughter. Said dumb girl pulled it out in a class she had with my daughter’s friend. The friend faked interest in the “new style of phone” and checked it and sure enough all the files she had sent my daughter were still on it. Friend calls me, I call school SRO, he pulls “criminal genius” out of class. She confesses to where she got the phone. SRO returned the phone to my daughter that evening and lo and behold there were not only pictures of the girl and her friend on the phone, but there were also text messages she exchanged with her friends where they were laughing about the fact this was the SECOND phone the punk kid had stolen from my daughter. They also listed several electronic items that “they” (apparently a ring of h.s. kids) had “ready for the next shipment”. The thief/punk was arrested, expelled from school and ultimately pled out the case. His sentence? Community service, probation, and he had to pay us the $150 deductible we had to pay to get a new phone. Apparently the two nights immediately after his arrest (which occured three days before Chrismas) where he was housed with Gwinnett’s less-than-finest residents while dressed in a less-than-fashionalbe orange jump suit was quite the “schooling” for this young man. He did all the things he was sentenced to do and is now in college. The two dumb girls? Suspended from that high school for the rest of the year and had to make alternative schooling arrangements. They were never arrested because “there wasn’t enough proof.” If pictures and text messages RIGHT ON THE STOLEN PHONE aren’t enough, then I don’t know what is!


October 16th, 2009
3:01 pm

Im sorry I stole the Hookahs.. I’d return them but forget where I stole them from. Thanks for giving me the address though.. I sorta remember now ..


October 17th, 2009
6:54 pm

On the flip side . . . I work at Starbucks. In the last 2plus years, many many people have left their handbags, computers, cell phones and car keys on counters, in restrooms and on tables when they either left or went outside for a cigarette.
NOT ONCE has anything been stolen. Everything has been brought to the counter for safe keeping.
Most people (certainly not all) are honest!

Chris Broe

October 19th, 2009
12:32 pm

Great stuff, Steve!

but please tell your trolls to stop using emoticons. I’m frightened of them, especially the one used above, which depicts the face of a guy nursing a gas bubble.

Thank you, and keep watching “Cops”, the best show EVER!


October 19th, 2009
1:27 pm

WTF MOMENT: “People Who Don’t Get It: A woman called the police and complained that her dog groomer didn’t do a good job.”<— Like Really Are you serious…
Wow Moment: 7700 block of Spalding Drive: The manager of a grocery store caught a woman stealing meat and Kool-Aid. He refused to prosecute her. .> <.<


October 20th, 2009
12:20 pm

Any chance we can get a racial breakdown of the supsects being discussed here? Or is that axing too much?

Tommy Chong

October 20th, 2009
1:12 pm

Now I know where I can buy a Hookah in Sandy Springs man…


October 25th, 2009
12:44 pm

Hmmmmmm…., let’s just say they were “well tanned”.


October 28th, 2009
2:24 pm


November 2nd, 2009
4:43 pm

at least you didn’t say racist. I now believe he can define both words. But I still believe they were tanned as well.