For this cop, relief from job stress is spelled V-e-g-a-s

Regardless of what you do, each of you should have your “Happy Place.” Mine and Detective Sandy’s is Vegas.

Ah, yes, it’s like Six Flags — only with a smoking section.

Vegas is one of those places that everyone should experience — at least a dozen times. If you’re opposed to gambling, smoking cigars in fancy bars and beautiful architecture, then you didn’t stay long enough. Vegas is fun. If you don’t think it’s fun then, well, go again until you “get it.”

I’m sure your job has stress. Mine does. I mean, this part doesn’t -unless you can’t think of anything to write about. But my other job has stress — lots of it. Crime, and especially crime prevention, isn’t pretty.

They say “What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas.” Sounds really serious, doesn’t it? Vegas is as much about sight-seeing as anything else. You can bet on that. (Get it?)

Here is what I suggest: Find a time. February is good. Not too hot and not too cold. I say this as I am going in August, but I like the pools, too. By the way, guys, the big hotels staff the pools — yes, they have them on payroll — with beautiful women and girls. They also staff them with hunky guys — much like myself, but not carrying handcuffs in their swim trunks. Well, some do but, well, just mix it up how you want.

If you like the “Old Vegas,” stay near Freemont Street. To save yourself a bunch of cab fare, though, stay on the other end of the strip where the MGM and other premier hotels are. You’ll end up there anyway.

Go to New York New York. Ride the roller coaster on the roof, but spend time walking around the casino, bars and restaurants. They are set up like the old streets of New York.

They have a piano bar there — dueling pianos — that is a ton of fun. The guy next to me won 10 grand on a slot machine. He sat there in his NASCAR hat wondering why the machine was going nutzo and why a big burley guy put something in the slot to cancel the machine while it was making all sorts of noise. I leaned over and said: “This is a really good day for you, sir. I’ll watch over you here until you get paid. This, of course, will cost you 50 bucks.”

He looked at me like I had three heads and immediately hired someone to beat me up. I hate people with a lot of money.

They have buffets there that will serve you prime rib, steaks and seafood, including the famous desert lobster for only 10 bucks. It’s not a rip-off. Vegas believes in keeping folks happy. Happy equals money.

Look, I’m outta here and I’m going to “Chill City” for a few days just to relax and have fun. Detective Sandy will play every (&#^$&@@)-ing slot machine they have, starting with the one just outside the airport gate. But, as I compute our finances, she wins more than she loses, so at the very least we’ll get one or two meals paid for.

Now, if you’re in Vegas this weekend, we’ll be in Margaritaville, probably between two to a hundred times, so come on by and, uh, we’ll talk about, uh, whatever. It doesn’t matter.

I’m out. Nothing serious until Tuesday. Don’t call!!

12 comments Add your comment


August 21st, 2009
4:45 pm



August 23rd, 2009
6:56 pm

Hey Steve, Do you have any influence right here in Georgia? Wouldn’t you like a little New York New York in your own back yard? I’m suggesting Cherokee County (since that is where I live).

Chris Broe

August 25th, 2009
1:32 pm

What happens to convicted murderers in Vegas? They get a STAY (of execution) in Vegas!

lil elvis

August 26th, 2009
9:18 am

So y’all going to the Green Door or the Red Roster ;)

w. walden

August 26th, 2009
6:55 pm

Hey Steve, a cold one, the Big Burger at Margaritaville, careful of the Volcano and enjoy. Elvis is, across the street, small club, he’s the best, just due west behind the Bellagio,about a block, parallel to the Strip………ask around for the location…

David S

August 27th, 2009
2:51 pm

Certainly looks like other cops have different ideas on stress relief:


August 27th, 2009
5:37 pm

I agree with you brother! I’m a cop of 32 years and travel to Vegas 2-3 times a year. Its great fun!

Lt. Steve

August 27th, 2009
7:07 pm

Okay, back. Good trip–not profitable but good. I saw a woman at Ceasar’s on the craps table with $87,000 worth of chips and not a clue. She had a ring the size of a small planet on her hand and a wig she bought at Wal-Mart on her head. It wasn’t even straight. She wore some Elvis sunglasses, since the 1 a.m. sunlight is so bright, and on every roll she went “Whoooo-eeeeee,” even on the losing ones. I’m not sure but either she’s reallllllllyyyyy lucky or there’s a sugar daddy out there with poor eyesight. Still, isn’t that why we’re there? The Human Zoo was alive and well. There was like show and tell by the plastic surgeons. Good times.

W.C. McCall

August 27th, 2009
7:36 pm

Have an awesome time with the hookers out there!!


August 28th, 2009
9:37 am

Glad to have you back Lt. Steve!


August 29th, 2009
3:30 pm

Sounds like you had a a nice time Steve. Sorry that it wasn’t profitable. Hopefully, the meals still got paid for. :) I need to go out to Vegas one of these days. Anyone I know who has gone had a blast and had nothing but good things to say. I know one place I would go for sure being the geek that I am. Not sure what hotel it’s in but I’d like to go do the Star Trek experience they have out there. I want to say it’s in the MGM but couldn’t say for sure. Maybe if no one wins the lotto this week and and rolls over again I’ll take my last week of vacation from my job and go have some fun. :)


September 1st, 2009
10:54 pm

Okay … so my job isn’t as stressful as a cop (I have dated a couple over the past year if that counts) but I agree … VEGAS is a great place for stress relief. Up until the economy took a nosedive I made a point of traveling out there at least three or four times a year and never once was I bored … you can’t beat the action, the excitement, and, oh mercy – the people watching. And, if you tire of the fun (yeah right) you can rent a convertible (or a Harley) and drive an hour away from the Strip and be surrounded by the beauty of the desert. Sigh … gee thanks …. now I’m ready to go! By the way KennesawDave … Star Trek used to be in the Hilton.