I sadly forgot to place “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” on a series recording on my DVR so I tragically missed the fifth episode of this possibly Emmy-winning reality show. But that will never happen again, readers!
As a result, I’ve had to glean from other recaps (especially the fine recap by Hollywood Life, thank you very much) to find out what I didn’t learn. This is thus officially a meta-recap of a recap:
1) Christmas is a state of mind, not a date on the calendar. Honey Boo Boo’s family decorates the house for Christmas in July. Why not? Every day is like Christmas in their house, right? And they do something charitable, too, by collecting food and toys for people worse off than them. They do exist.
2) Squealing is sort of like barking. Apparently, Glitzy is like a baby when he isn’t being fed enough: he cries. Or squeals. And it’s annoying. This reminds me of a puppy my cousin once got who barked and wailed so much, that my aunt had to take him back. In this case, Mama June sends Glitzy back to the breeder, something she couldn’t do with, say, her kids.
3) Friends who are nicknamed “crazy” are usually… crazy. “Crazy Tony” hangs one of the ladies upside down off a tree. He flips a four wheeler onto himself. And he drags the girls around on an inner tube through the mud. Redneck water skiing!
4) New word of the day: “smexy.” June describes her husband Sugar Bear in a Santa Claus suit as “smexy.” Apparently, he’s smelly and sexy at the same time. He describes the odor of the suit akin to a “chain-smoking goat.” Mmmm….mmmm!
5) Where toenail clippings should go? No. Not the floor. Not the garbage receptacle. The bed. That’s where they should go. Adds texture while you’re sleeping!
UPDATE: The TV ratings this past Wednesday were up a bit from week two and the best yet: 2.34 million viewers and a 1.1 18-39 rating.
By Rodney Ho, Radio & TV Talk