“Purple Haze” and “Purple Rain” are associated with good times.
Purple drank and purple hash? Not so much.
A man who admitted smoking “purple hash,” which I assume is synthetic or laced marijuana, misbehaved so badly aboard a Southwest Airlines flight the jet had to make an emergency landing in Portland Tuesday.
The Oregonian’s lively writeup says the “brouhaha,” a word that contains “ha-ha” but ain’t funny, began when passenger Sheron Lamar Rogers told the flight crew he had a first-class ticket.
Southwest, of course, is famous for cheap flights and NOT having first-class seats on any of its planes.
Once aboard the Seattle-to-Sacramento flight, the 26-year-old refused to stow his luggage, telling the flight crew “I do what I want,” and then proceeded to do just that, according to federal court documents cited by The Oregonian.
In his seat, he repeatedly pressed the “call” button. A flight attendant asked him if he had an emergency and he said “Yes, I need a [bleeping] drink!”
For some reason, the plane took off with this jackburro still aboard.
In flight, the man repeatedly flashed gang signs at other passengers, screamed about Jesus and demanded booze.
After demanding three glasses of wine and being told he could only have one, Rogers told the airline waitress “Get the [bleep] out of my face” and “Jesus loves you.”
He then demanded to speak to the pilot.
Flight attendants secretly asked other passengers to help restrain Rogers if he became violent. I hope those people get special discounts on future flights, or at least judo training coupons.
One flight attendant boiled a pot of water to use as a weapon if the “brouhaha” got real.
When taken into custody, Rogers told federal agents he had smoked “purple hash” but did not feel high. He said the gang signs were “for Jesus” and the passengers that fled his seating area did so because they don’t like black people.
Once again, the secret to being a bad human is always finding a way to blame others for your actions.
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