The White House has finally confirmed a suspicion long held true by anyone who managed to sit through an entire episode of “Alf”: Extraterrestrials do not live on Earth.
The official government response came in reply to an online petition seeking the Obama administration to “formally acknowledge an extraterrestrial presence engaging the human race.”
Phil Larson, who works on space policy and communications at the White House, crushed the souls of conspiracy theorists and Star Trek fans in one succinct paragraph:
The U.S. government has no evidence that any life exists outside our planet, or that an extraterrestrial presence has contacted or engaged any member of the human race. In addition, there is no credible information to suggest that any evidence is being hidden from the public’s eye.
The Obama administration, perhaps sensing they’ve no hope of getting the Creationist vote, said alien life undoubtedly exists somewhere.
Many scientists and mathematicians have looked with a statistical mindset at the question of whether life likely exists beyond Earth and have come to the conclusion that the odds are pretty high that somewhere among the trillions and trillions of stars in the universe there is a planet other than ours that is home to life.
But, unlike ET, those alien life forms have yet to phone the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue home.
Many have also noted, however, that the odds of us making contact with any of them—especially any intelligent ones—are extremely small, given the distances involved.
The petition landed on the White House doorstep courtesy of a “We the People” online petition set up by Obama administration. To get an official response, a petition must have 25,000 signatures within 30 days.
A petition asking the Obama administration to “stop lying” is only 24,765 signatures short.