Police (Off)Beat | Forging a path to jail

  • When the card of a man who ran up a $14,859 bill at the Marriott Marquis in downtown Atlanta was declined, a security officer noticed his wallet was stuffed with a cornucopia of credit. The man, who babbled “incomprehensibly” for 20 minutes, told police he was born in 2001 and was working with a “group of Nigerians” adept at forging cashier’s checks. He had $180,000 in bogus paper on him.

    To a well-trained dog, this smells like bacon.

    To a well-trained dog, this smells like bacon.

  • A DeKalb man who tried to cash a forged Four Seasons Inc. check at a Dunwoody bank fled when the teller started asking questions. He left his real ID behind and was soon captured.
  • An assistant manager at a Cobb Goodwill store is charged with theft after falsely telling her employer she had been subpoenaed to appear in court for a period of 10 work days.
  • A regular at a Doraville liquor store was busted trying to cash a bogus $820 check. He told police he got it from “three guys in the parking lot” who also provided a fake ID. Too bad for his liver that he’d cashed personal checks there before. His real photo ID was in the store’s computer system.
  • A gunshot victim left a Decatur hospital and immediately proceeded to shoot up the Hopewell Lane home of his alleged assailant with a .40 caliber handgun. He’ll continue to recuperate in the DeKalb jail.
  • A 16-year-old Stone Mountain girl that assisted in the carjacking and robbery of a woman who’d stopped for gas on Briarcliff Road was busted when police recovered the stolen the Honda Pilot. Inside, police found the victim’s cellphone, which contained a video of the girl calling the victim a “stupid [bleep].”
  • Undercover officers spent about $500 on lap dances and drinks while investigating “illegal prostitution” at an Atlanta club.
  • A woman an undercover Cobb officer met online offered to have sex for $150 at a Parkwood Circle hotel. Another woman, at the same hotel, charged $125.
  • A Georgia utility appears powerless to stop “A.J.,” an Atlanta man who charges a mere $5 to reconnect electrical service at homes in the Greenbriar Mall area.
  • Atlanta police beeped at a literal streetwalker impeding traffic on Joseph E. Boone Boulevard, causing her to yell “I am sick of you [bleepers] blowing them [bleep] horns.” It is quiet in jail, maybe.
  • A man pulled over for speeding down I-75 was acting nervous, so police brought in a drug-sniffing dog. The man got more nervous when the dog immediately began tearing into a laptop bag containing $17,000 in cash. Another case contained 8 ounces of marijuana.
  • A copper thief tearing apart an AC unit on Peachtree Avenue would have gotten away with it, if he’d not paused to “sniff Freon” in the presence of children. A nearby adult alerted police to the suspicious behavior.

– Information obtained from police reports and criminal warrants.

11 comments Add your comment

Nickie

August 13th, 2011
9:52 am

You can’t cure stupid!

Nickie

August 13th, 2011
9:53 am

You simply cannot cure stupid!

Mr. Ed

August 13th, 2011
9:57 am

Posting twice proves it.

Kennesaw Dave

August 13th, 2011
12:35 pm

$500 on lap dances just to try and bust a stripper for offering a little extra. Oh yeah, that’s great use of our tax dollars.

Patrick

August 13th, 2011
2:22 pm

A Georgia utility appears powerless to stop “A.J.,” an Atlanta man who charges a mere $5 to reconnect electrical service at homes in the Greenbriar Mall area.
Are they kidding? Powerless? Brain dead, yes, powerless, no.
Simply inform the utility user who lost power that any unauthorized turn-on other than the power company woud trigger an immediate $1,000 fine and no more power without putting up an additional $1,000 utility deposit.
Think that would work?

George Clinton

August 13th, 2011
2:28 pm

“Powerless” was a play on words.

Tydarius

August 13th, 2011
5:56 pm

“…a man who ran up a $14,859 bill at the Marriott Marquis in downtown Atlanta…”

A hotel that allows a guest to run up a $14K tab without some kind of security deposit deserves whatever they get. That’s the same mentality that led banks to make no doc NINJA mortgage loans to idiots who would never be able to repay.

Nickie

August 31st, 2011
6:44 pm

You really simply cannot cure stupid!

Nickie

August 31st, 2011
6:45 pm

You really simply cannot simply cure stupid!

Nickie

August 31st, 2011
6:46 pm

You really simply cannot really simply cure stupid!

Grant Dennis

August 31st, 2011
6:49 pm

Okay Nickie I think we understand. Please step away from the keyboard. You may also want to consider decaf.