Delta bans drunk flirt for life

A Georgia man who tried to impress a young Georgia lady aboard a Delta flight after quaffing multiple mixed drinks has been banned from the Atlanta-based airline for life.

Five of these can make the "friendly skies" too friendly, according to recent reports.

“I’m a dumb[bleep],” says Bryan Sisco, 40, from Winston in south Douglas County, in The Commercial Appeal.

The Memphis newspaper recounts the following tale:

Sisco drank beer before heading to the Dallas airport for an evening flight to Atlanta. Once there, Delta flight 2060 was delayed for a couple of hours, so he got hopped up on five double whiskey and Cokes.

When he boarded the plane last Thursday, Sisco, who said he’s in the process of getting a divorce, sat in the wrong seat and began flirting with Danielle Valimont, 23, from Griffin.

In her blog, Valimont said Sisco asked “Have you ever wondered if someone could get something on the plane they weren’t supposed to?”

Then he fired up a “silver metal torch-like item,” Valimont wrote.

TSA, it seems, was once again feeling up the wrong people.

Sisco told her he had a gas cannister that could make everyone on board pass out.

She freaked out and texted a message to friends — “‘I’m sitting beside a crazy man.”

The loquacious passenger told her he was an air marshal, a job he was “born into” because his dad was in the CIA.

Valimont faked a bathroom run and alerted a flight attendant to the amorous loon.

Pilots diverted the plane to Memphis, where police came aboard and arrested Sisco, who says he has no recollection of that event.

“I fell asleep, and woke up in handcuffs in Memphis with the FBI questioning me, Sisco told The Commercial Appeal. “I spent three days in a county jail and a fourth day in a federal penitentiary. I was stripped buck-naked twice.”

Facing charges of carrying a weapon or explosive on an aircraft, he was released on a $10,000 bond.

Delta’s no longer ready when you are Mr. Sisco.