Stodgy Brits try to block Girls Gone Wild filming

Nobility yes, “nubility” no.

Girls Gone Wild researchers conclude paid girlfriends love cheap caps and T-shirts.

That’s the word out of unjolly old England, which is trying to block the filming of Girls Gone Wild events on the once-important island.

According to an article in The Telegraph, the stodgy fellows who run the area of Newcastle, a town that parties so hard they named a famous beer after it, are asking the “Home Office” (not a tax deduction, but the U.K.’s version of the Department of Homeland Security) to ban the filming of nubile wenches nationwide.

They’ve clearly got their crumpets in a wad. Here’s the text from a motion they’ve concocted:

“This House is deeply concerned that U.S. pornography production company Mantra Films Inc. is filming Girls Gone Wild in the U.K., which approaches young women, many of them intoxicated, in public places, and encourages them to expose their breasts, simulate sex acts and have sex on camera in exchange for Girls Gone Wild merchandise.”

A curious reaction for a country that served as the cradle of capitalism.

A spokesman for the Girls Gone Wild tour said public toplessness is a “really fun celebration of freedom and youthful expression.”

Here’s to all who lift a pint — and shirt — for freedom.