Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?
“Big Bang Theory” star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split.
Bialik, who is famous for starring in “Blossom” when she was younger, is a huge proponent of attachment parenting and has written a book and has a blog about the parenting choice.
Attachment parenting promotes breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping, and wearing babies in slings.
“Earlier this year, Bialik published a book on the subject called “Beyond the Sling: A Real-Life Guide to Raising Confident, Loving Children the Attachment Parenting Way.”
“But according to the former “Blossom” star, the nontraditional parenting style did not play a part in her divorce.”
” ‘The hands-on style of parenting we practice played no role in the changes that led to this decision; relationships are complicated no matter what style of parenting you choose,’ Bialik wrote in a post on her parenting blog.”
We also practiced attachment parenting and I could see how if one parent didn’t want the children in bed with them or didn’t want the mom to nurse for 18 months or two years that could cause conflict. I don’t think it caused our marriage any strife but we do have disagreements as our kids are getting older about handling discipline or problems and I could see how that could drive a wedge between parents if not worked out.
Our biggest disagreement probably when they were younger was about sleep training. I would not let a child cry it out, and Michael was feeling pretty OK about that.
Do you agree or disagree with your spouse about your parenting style? Have there ever been problems because of differences in styles?
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103 comments Add your comment
Herpes Butter
November 30th, 2012
1:15 am
For a moment I thought i was in Spain. Turns out it was Portugal.
I know…..It was funny.
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
1:45 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files for Divorce E! Online'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.com - Zap2it.com (blog)all 124 news articles » [...]
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?
November 30th, 2012
2:05 am
[...] more at Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog). Share this news: Filed Under: [...]
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
3:48 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files for Divorce E! Online'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.com - Zap2it.com (blog)all 126 news articles » [...]
Big Bang : The Latest Fuzz
November 30th, 2012
4:02 am
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Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
5:50 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files for Divorce E! Online'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.com - Zap2it.com (blog)all 127 news articles » [...]
FCM
November 30th, 2012
6:54 am
Even though they divorce they will still have to parent together. It is one of the harshest truths about divorcing with children in the mix. You will NEVER be fully rid of the _____________ (insert term for ex spouse here) and will still have to find some way to parent with them Some spouse perpetuate the sterotypes of the divorced parent by using their children as pawns in a really ugly game. It really only hurts the child.
Although it is easier said then done parents even divorced ones have to find ways to support each other and keep the child’s interest at the core. My ex started about a year taking an interest in the lives of our children. We found that communicating by email works for us. We keep it business like..it is still in it’s infancy and we have 7 years to go (only sounds short) before the children are adults. I imagine as that happens our parent will be less “co-parenting” and more as someone (DB I think it was you) once described as advisory to my adult child. Thus they will likely just go the parent they feel like hearing from.
BlondeHoney
November 30th, 2012
7:20 am
FCM, you are right about once when they are adults, they gravitate towards one parent before the other. My boys rarely call my ex for anything and my oldest told me his father recently complained that he never calls him. There’s a reason they don’t call him but he’ll never understand why.
motherjanegoose
November 30th, 2012
7:26 am
Oh yes, our parenting experiences/styles were polar opposites. I grew up with OCD and my husband grew up with Alcholics. We did have to meet somewhere in the middle but since I had taken child psychology classes and had been around lots more children than he had, I usually had more of an input as to what we did.
I watched families and tried to emulate what I saw was a success. I also asked lots of questions to of families I admired. Examples of issues had a vast difference of experience in: a set bed time, education, family meals, hygiene, chores, homework, limits and no TV on during dinner time ( his house had a TV on 24/7), knowing the families of the kids whom ours wanted to spend the night with, and church are just a few. When the kids got older, he told me….” I thought some of those things were crazy but now I see how they were important.” This, when he saw some of the things our kid’s peers did and we then heard about it or when they would come over to visit.
Parenting is touch stuff and not for the faint of heart. It is sad, to me, to see parents who really do not take their job seriously and their children will be the ones to suffer.
motherjanegoose
November 30th, 2012
7:32 am
OOOPS…examples of issues WE and Parent is tough stuff. I need more coffee.
@ BlondeHoney..I have had this discussion with my husband. Once your kids do not need you for much, they will only be in touch with you if they want to be with you. They will not depend on your financial investment but on the demeanor of the visit. If they do not enjoy being with you, they will not stay in touch. We have family members that we are not in touch with ( too often) as the visit is difficult. You make time for the things that are important to you and when things and people are not important, they are eliminated.
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? - Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) |
November 30th, 2012
7:33 am
[...] Article from http://blogs.ajc.com/momania/2012/11/29/mayim-bialik-could-parenting-style-differences-cause-a-divor... ‹ Divorce Research: New Study Shows Journaling Post-Split May Do More Harm … – [...]
Kat
November 30th, 2012
7:53 am
I would presume that if parenting style were a problem, then a divorce will only exacerbate the problem between them.
Voice of Reason
November 30th, 2012
7:54 am
Enter your comments here
Voice of Reason
November 30th, 2012
7:55 am
What would Amy Farrah Fowler do?
She should marry Sheldon.
Jeff
November 30th, 2012
8:02 am
Of course parenting styles impact relationships. Inflexibility has burned my exes’ bridge to me and we are no longer on speaking terms. She has never once attempted to inculde me in any decisions, either good or bad and has actually taken strides to exclude me from knowing anything that goes on.
Of course, that hasn’t stopped me from finding out for myself, but it has made the triangle of the relationship (which FCM correctly stated will NEVER go away) very tense.
Showing complete disdain for your partner’s opinions has consequences for the life of your child.
Jeff
November 30th, 2012
8:10 am
On a positive note, my current GF and I have different styles but they compliment each other and we both realize where my strengths are needed and where hers are needed and we use that to enhance our “team”.
Seems so simple it makes me wonder what’s wrong that I’m not noticing. lol.
Roni
November 30th, 2012
8:16 am
Anything extreme, such as attachment parenting, refusal to breastfeed, etc, should really be discussed prior to having children in the first place, because of course differing opinions are going to cause strain on a marriage. That being said, from my observations of friends, attachment parenting in general seems to be more stressful on marriages than other methods. Even if Bialik and her husband both share the philosophy, I fail to see how any marriage could sustain the extremes they took it to.
Chaos
November 30th, 2012
8:17 am
Or you could be like my parents, Mom handled everything kid related and Dad only got involved when shiat got real.
motherjanegoose
November 30th, 2012
8:34 am
@ Roni…I can honestly say that I did not discuss breastfeeding with my now husband before we were married. I even fought with my own Mother about it, as she did not breastfeed us. Do most people discuss breastfeeding? I guess I missed it. We had pre-marital counseling and I do not remember even a mention of it.
Here is a question I have…could we insert the word MONEY for parenting style and also see a cause for divorce? OUR money styles were VERY different and we knew it but LOVE put a blanket over it and then we had some fireworks…haha!
My husband has been a VERY involved parent. It is one of the things I am most proud of him for. His Dad was for finances ( sometimes) and a disciplinarian. He is very different, in that aspect. When mine were small they stayed with their Dad, while I worked. We had opposite schedules. As I began to travel, they were home for days with their Dad. They are all still alive and healthy and they got to do things together that I was not a part of. I am happy for them!
Mayhem
November 30th, 2012
8:36 am
Having babies changes EVERYTHING. You can say this or that prior to the babies arriving, but as soon as they get here ALL BETS ARE OFF. I speak from experience.
Parents must be a united team in front of the children. We are the adults, we make the rules, etc. We must stand together, or the children will see that we aren’t and they will drive a bigger wedge into the relationship. They will learn to play us off each other.
Hubs and I make decisions together. If one of the kids comes to one of us, we tell them, I have to talk to your Dad/Mom first. Of course my kids are in their 20’s now, but it worked when they were growing up. We made decisions together. We stood united in front of the kids.
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
8:55 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files for Divorce E! Online'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.com - Zap2it.com (blog)all 129 news articles » [...]
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
8:57 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files for Divorce E! Online'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.com - Zap2it.com (blog)all 130 news articles » [...]
motherjanegoose
November 30th, 2012
9:12 am
@ Mayhem…my neighbor once told me, that my daughter told her…” If Mom says NO, I wait until I am home with Dad and then ask him.” She was probably 10 or so. I relayed it to my husband and he was surprised. Unity was not always on board here and that did cause problems.
I am 100% with you: Having babies changes EVERYTHING.
I have often mentioned ( here) that being a parent is VERY different from being around children for years and giving advice. Most anyone who IS a parent agrees and they usually laugh at the ridiculousness of this comment and say YA THINK? Those who are not sometimes disagree. My youngest sister was a nanny for 2 different families, for 5 or 6 years, in her twenties. She managed their houses as they often traveled. She has known my two from the beginning and she agrees that parenting is different than being around children. I am not talking about only birthing the child…I am talking about those who have custody too. 24/7 responsibility is different from being a teacher , I have been both! Of course this is just my opinion, take it or leave it.
I met someone who recently retired and moved out to the country. She is a very nice lady and told me that she has chickens , kind of like living on a farm. I laughed at her and told her that I lived on a working farm and that it is a LOT of work. I will NOT be retiring to the country to raise chickens…been there done that. When you have to work your farm, it is different than hanging out with the chickens.
pws
November 30th, 2012
9:20 am
TWG- I would like to hear how the crowds were at Disneyland. Was it what you expected, better, or worse? That said, I think there are probably more reasons that their parenting style that brought Mayim and her husband to decide to divorce. I imagine that her going back into acting, after being out of it when she met him and married him has had a huge impact as well. I have read her blogs, and from what I gather from her writing, it may be that money has played a part. She talks about being a “tight” person when it comes to money, and now that she is earning big bucks again with BB Theory, husband may have wanted to spend some of it. I’m sure there are always multiple reasons why a relationship ends.
misawa
November 30th, 2012
9:28 am
I really only know one couple that did the attachment parenting thing. Both kids, 11 and 6 (or somewhere around there) still sleep with mom while dad has a separate bedroom/office. While it’s sad for me to even think about, it seems to be working for them.
Or maybe not and they’re just REALLY good at putting on a face about it.
misawa
November 30th, 2012
9:34 am
I will add… a big plus to being married for 9 years before “pulling the goalie” is we had A LOT of time to discuss parenting ideas, philosophies, etc. We even had two names for each sex in case there was a surprise. ;)
Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
9:55 am
[...] Mayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce?Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)?Big Bang Theory? star Mayim Bialik announced last week that she and her husband of nine years were getting divorced and of course people began speculating about the split. Bialik, who is famous for starring in ?Blossom? when she was younger, is a huge …Mayim Bialik Files For Divorce Starpulse.com (blog)'The Big Bang Theory' star files for divorce Examiner.comMayim Bialik files for divorce from husband of 9 years; actress seeks joint … Washington Post TMZ.comall 132 news articles » [...]
JennyMama
November 30th, 2012
10:05 am
I did attachment parenting with my daughter. My husband (now my ex-husband) and I discussed what our parenting style would be before she was born. I had a problem with breast-feeding in the beginning but refused to give up and didn’t. I nursed for a year, did the baby-wearing thing, co-sleeping and all. I took to parenting like a duck takes to water. My ex on the other hand was resentful that I didn’t just give up on the whole attachment parenting thing. It was too much work for him and involves putting your child first before yourself, something he would never do. I made all the parenting decisions but not without discussing them with him first and he wouldn’t have an opinion. When I filed for divorce, he held all that against me and tried to claim that I didn’t allow him to do anything. When there’s an infant involved you can’t really wait for someone to figure out how to take care of that infant. My daughter is now 4 1/2 and has figured out that she would rather be with mommy. Mommy attends to her needs…there’s a flow between us that just works. We still co-sleep but she does, will and can sleep in her own bed by herself. At her father’s house she sleeps in her own room and own bed.
Mayhem
November 30th, 2012
10:05 am
Sorry, but my hubby stays in bed with me. We didn’t do “attachment parenting, co-sleeping” The kids were in their own beds. No way will the kids be in bed and hubby’s in another ROOM…..however, once in a while, when they were younger, they could pile into the bed with us. But as soon as they fell asleep, they were moved to their own beds.
who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men
November 30th, 2012
10:52 am
I love the way she describes attachment parenting as “hands on” like those of us who didn’t let our kids sleep with us or run in to coddle them at every sneeze, cough, whimper, and crying fit in the middle of the night are somehow not “hands on” parents.
Me
November 30th, 2012
11:00 am
I can see where the attachment parenting could hurt a relationship. After having kids, most couples have less time for each other because of the focus on the child or children. Attachment parenting increases that focus. I can see a husband feeling neglected after a while. Many Many marriages have ended because the spouses lost touch with each other. My child doesn’t sleep with us (although she will get up in the middle of the night and try to sneak in) we feel that our bed is our space. Be it intimate conversation,intimacy, or just enjoying being together watching something stupid on T.V., it is our adult space.
Hmm moment:
I often wonder if some of the people so into attachment parenting have sex with their kids in the bed with them. They say they don’t, but you know some of them probably do. Can you even imagine trying to go at it while your 7 year old is sleeping on the other side of the bed? My luck my kid would wake up and be damaged for life.
Soccer MILF
November 30th, 2012
11:00 am
That girl needs a nose job
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
November 30th, 2012
11:04 am
“Holy Matrimony” is “holy.” Parenting problems only arise when one or both of the parents are not seeking, or appreciative of, divine guidance.
catlady
November 30th, 2012
11:08 am
MJG–it isn’t just the kids that suffer. It is also the others who are around the suffering kids. I have several kids right now who don’t seem to mean dirt to their parents. Many have already been abandoned for the grandparents or others to raise. These kids, desperate for attention, inflict their misery on the other kids they are around, and on the teachers who try to reach them. I can only remember one child like this the first few years I taught, but with each year now the numbers and desperation seems to grow.
Chaos
November 30th, 2012
11:33 am
See also Helicopter parenting….
Denise
November 30th, 2012
12:46 pm
@Me re: your Hmmm moment – I’ve always wondered about that. I am not a parent so I have not been faced with this but my ex-sister-in-law had my niece in the bed every night and my brother slept on the couch. My brother’s new fiance is the one who taught my niece to sleep in her own bed. She was about 3 before she slept in a bed by herself and she screamed bloody murder every night, but the fiance didn’t care. She also kept her bed “sacred” for her and my brother ONLY to sleep in.
who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men
November 30th, 2012
1:24 pm
@Me and Denise….”Can you even imagine trying to go at it”….maybe that is how they get away with it…there is no “going at it” when there is a child in bed with you…there MAY be something that resembles rolling over and/or scratching a back, but “going at it”….I would think (and hope) not. Seems to me that “going at it” is mutually exclusive from attachment parenting. Maybe that’s the difference between us and them…maybe we’re “going at it” kind of folks and the attachment parents have more of a “you don’t mind if I take a little nap while we do this” kind of philosophy!
:-)
Mayim Bialik files for divorce – San Francisco Chronicle (blog) | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
2:01 pm
[...] Petition People MagazineMayim Bialik And Hubby Call It Quits! Filing For Divorce! PerezHilton.comMayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) Examiner.comall 145 news [...]
mom2alex&max
November 30th, 2012
2:15 pm
The whole attachment parenting thing never did ring any bells for me. I don’t like “wearing” babies, breastfeeding made me feel like I had a ball and chain (no one else can feed the baby so you never can be away for more than 2 hrs without pumping), and co-sleeping sounds like a nightmare. My husband feels the same way and I think that if one of us would have been determined to do it, it would have caused a SERIOUS rift in our marriage.
I always thought that the best gift you can give a child is a strong marriage. And while we live and die for our children, my husband and I make our marriage a priority. Something that, I am very sorry, but I can’t see how it would work when you are attachment parenting.
Captain Obvious
November 30th, 2012
2:58 pm
How can a parent expect a child to be Independent and contribute positively to society if they spend their first 3-4 years of life attached to your hip?
Isn’t it enough that mother nature had the kid physically attached to you for 9 months? Why extend that beyond what is natural?
Mayim Bialik Files For Divorce During Rough Year – WebProNews | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
2:59 pm
[...] Petition People MagazineMayim Bialik And Hubby Call It Quits! Filing For Divorce! PerezHilton.com Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) - Examiner.comall 148 news [...]
who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men
November 30th, 2012
3:13 pm
@TWG…..”I don’t think it caused our marriage any strife”….have you ever asked Michael if he thinks it caused any strife?
Denise
November 30th, 2012
5:00 pm
@who knows…Yes, I pray that when I get married we are “go at it” kind of folks! LOL! None of that co-sleeping. HAHAHA!
I also wonder about how a child becomes independent if consistently and constantly with a parent, even in sleep. I will say I wish I had more of a connection to my mother but not to the point where we slept together every night. I have a coworker who still sleeps with her mother when they visit and talks to her mother numerous times a day. I definitely envy the closeness but I do not envy the feeling I get sometimes that her mother has to cosign on her decisions. I don’t know. It’s a 6 in one hand, half dozen in the other, for me…as an adult. But I cannot imagine being the parent that attaches the child to the hip.
Mayim Bialik Files For Divorce During Rough Year – WebProNews | The Divorced Parents
November 30th, 2012
6:02 pm
[...] of sons OnTheRedCarpet.comMayim Bialik And Hubby Call It Quits! Filing For Divorce! PerezHilton.com Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) - People Magazineall 160 news [...]
Kat
November 30th, 2012
6:19 pm
@Chaos: Thanks for saying what I was thinking.
missnadine
November 30th, 2012
11:49 pm
I know a lot folks on this blog really like the Elf on the Shelf. I found this article with some funny pictures, and yes, some are PG13. http://hypervocal.com/entertainment/2012/20-creepy-elf-on-the-shelf/
Ann
December 1st, 2012
12:53 am
The percentage of parents practicing attachment parenting is fairly small, and those that practice it to more of an extreme are a tiny minority. The divorce rate is around 50%. To assume or speculate that this particular marriage failed because of attachment parenting or co-sleeping implies that couples who don’t have children sleeping in their bed must have great marriages and no-divorce. The divorce rate would be pretty low if that were the case. There are numerous reasons couples divorce. Money problems is usually high on the list. While parenting styles can cause disagreements, most couples work these things out and compromise, as needed.
For those who wonder about intimacy, I think there is misunderstanding about how co-sleeping often works. Most co-sleepers are kids under age 6. Kids under 6 typically sleep 10-12 hours. American adults average about 6-7 hours. The parents are not sleeping with the kids the entire time the kids are asleep. You put the kids to bed at night, then have plenty of time before you go to sleep. Or, you wake up much earlier in the morning. This leaves 3-6 hours of time each night or morning when couples can have time to themselves in another bedroom or elsewhere. It is easy to have regular intimacy.
I’d be curious to know how many of the people posting comments opposed to co-sleeping with kids co-sleep with their cat or dog?
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 1st, 2012
4:03 am
“Mayhem” has it figured out; and, Evil continues to exist in society for a reason.
Elvis slept with his mother until he was twelve or thirteen. Any woman who allows the same practice is perverting her child and subverting her marriage: failing to work out her bad karma from a polygamous or haremic past life or abusive upbringing, with a cheating, “Beta,” or as George W. Bush typifies, closeted (James Guckert/”Jeff Gannon”) “husband.”
The Arc of Civilization says monogamy is received grace from the Creator, with equal, unencumbered male and female as a single voice before their family, sharing in fidelity the literal miracle of sex. When a woman is “a god unto herself” she is no wife. The failed wife’s ejecting her spouse from the marital bower to feed her emotional dysfunction and project the same upon her otherwise Divine Gift is a profanation.
While only G-d is perfect, man and woman should complete and perfect each other, in G-d, and project that holiness through the righteous, sanctified upbringing of their children. In this way society shall abolish Evil.
Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik Officially Files for Divorce – Seattle Post Intelligencer | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
11:16 am
[...] For Divorce, Seeks Custody Of Her Two Sons International Business Times OnTheRedCarpet.com - Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) - San Francisco Chronicle (blog)all 176 news [...]
Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik Officially Files for Divorce – Seattle Post Intelligencer | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
12:21 pm
[...] For Divorce, Seeks Custody Of Her Two Sons International Business Times OnTheRedCarpet.com - Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) - People Magazineall 176 news [...]
M.E.
December 1st, 2012
1:14 pm
The only problem I would see with attachment parenting that would cause a divorce is competition between the father and the children for the mother’s attention, which would imply the father was not as committed to the parenting style as the mother.
Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik Officially Files for Divorce – Seattle Post Intelligencer | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
1:22 pm
[...] style not to blame Examiner.comMayim Bialik Files For Divorce During Rough Year WebProNewsMayim Bialik: Could parenting style differences cause a divorce? Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) International Business Times - OnTheRedCarpet.com - [...]
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 1st, 2012
1:23 pm
…or that the sincere, conned sperm donor was unaware of his unholy wife’s lesbian agenda gained from her perverse upbringing in a G-dless culture?
Time will tell.
jan
December 1st, 2012
2:36 pm
I don’t think that parenting style can cause a divorce, but I do think that it can exacerbate underlying issues that the couple isn’t acknowledging. The parenting style becomes the “proxy” for the other issues.
That said, it is obvious that I completely failed both of my normal, well-adjusted offspring by my failure to attach to them by not treating them as parasitic growths that I needed to have surgically removed from my hip and teat.
Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik Officially Files for Divorce – Seattle Post Intelligencer | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
3:23 pm
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Big Bang Theory’s Mayim Bialik Officially Files for Divorce – Seattle Post Intelligencer | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
4:26 pm
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Mayim Bialik of ‘The Big Bang Theory’ files for divorce – Examiner.com | The Divorced Parents
December 1st, 2012
8:34 pm
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Kiki
December 1st, 2012
9:04 pm
My children are 20 years apart I age, with different fathers. My first was raised old school style, i.e. six months breast feeding, own bed, etc. My now 5yr old breast fed two years, and still cosleeps with us. All 3 of my children have great confidence and self-esteem! My oldest are very successful as well. I feel that whatever works as a family unit is “to each their own.”
Mayim Bialik of ‘The Big Bang Theory’ files for divorce – Examiner.com | The Divorced Parents
December 2nd, 2012
7:43 am
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Mayim Bialik of ‘The Big Bang Theory’ files for divorce – Examiner.com | The Divorced Parents
December 2nd, 2012
8:42 am
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Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:10 am
@Kiki, How did changes in your view of the marital “partnership,” and the maturing of your self-image contribute to the changes in your parenting style?
Each child is a divine gift, but for broader edification from one whose 20-year-apart births demonstrate such power and grace, a little background on your parting with your first “family unit” offsprings’ “source” might be in order (death, disaffection?); and, would you describe either or both relationships as “Holy Matrimony” and why, or why not? If alive, is the first father a part of his children’s lives?
Asked in greatest respect and admiration, with full knowledge that “Each of us must work out his or her own salvation.”
TIA
itpdude
December 2nd, 2012
12:14 pm
Attachment Parenting = Wimpy Kids
atlmom
December 2nd, 2012
1:16 pm
will jones: godless culture? she’s Jewish. I believe her parents are israeli.
Ben
December 2nd, 2012
1:41 pm
I’m 43, a home-spooled attachment kid and I still share a bed with my folks. Life’s grand.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
2:40 pm
@atlmom – Having spent near 20 years in the “culture” referenced, as an American I believe it to be a violation of American Exceptionalism’s credal civil religion to teach one’s children that others are “sub-human” for having not been born of a similar genetic inheritance as they.
GardenDiva
December 2nd, 2012
2:54 pm
@Captain Obvious –
Children who are products of attachment parenting or some variation thereof tend to be quite independent as they mature. In many (maybe that should read “in most”) cultures, attachment parenting (cosleeping, breastfeeding and “babywearing”) is the norm not the exception. It IS natural, just as breastfeeding is natural even to what some consider an “extended age”. What is not natural is for a mother to constantly leave an infant in the care of others.
@mom2alex&max – Why would you want to be away from your baby more than two hours, especially when they are little?
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
3:25 pm
Whatever “baby raising” contributed to America’s foundational culture, whether that which blossomed in the notion of “Scot Free’s” bearing fruit in the Scottish Enlightenment, or manifest in the utopian ideals of whig Jeffersonianism’s individual sovereignty now so clearly under “terminal pressure” from the same societal “forces” we escaped to found America: what “other cultures’” norm is or was proved inadequate to the task.
We must rediscover what we did so well, and again raise our children to be giants, and not the slaves prevailing “culture” now requires.
One suspects the critical, and now largely “missing” key, is “Holy Matrimony”…literally “Holy.”
“Annuit Coeptis” is what our ancestors understood.
Why we’ve forgotten its true meaning is easy enough to understand…the obscene Fasces now affixed to the front wall of the U.S. House, and enforced embrace of its concomitant perversion could hardly be more obvious for the enlightened American or student of history and culture…or Child of G-d…as ought to be each member of America’s Electorate…by definition and by Our Deist Founding.
Ben
December 2nd, 2012
5:27 pm
There’s more then one way to raise a youngin’.
mom2alex&max
December 2nd, 2012
5:47 pm
@GardenDiva: because maybe I want to sleep for more than 2 hrs at a time? Because maybe I have to work? Because maybe I just want a break? Because it took TWO people to bring a baby into this world so why should I and I alone bear ALL the responsibility for wearing and feeding 24/7? Because maybe I want to be my own person? Because maybe I don’t define myself by being a mother? Because maybe I want to rest? Because maybe I want to get my hair and nails done?
Because maybe I don’t like having to be isolated every 2 hrs while I breastfeed a kid for 45 mins? I never could breastfeed “discreetly” and my babies to FOREVER to feed for some reason.
Ben
December 2nd, 2012
6:06 pm
Alex&Max need to be put in timeout.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
6:26 pm
Nice to see “mom2alex&max” also has “It” figured out.
Wonder what particular culture produces women who understand the truth such as she and “Mayhem?”
May their generations be blessed.
Ann
December 2nd, 2012
7:06 pm
@itpdude – Parents who practice attachment parenting and co-sleeping are a minority in the U.S. So, how do you explain all the spoiled, wimpy kids that most of the regular bloggers on this site complain about? Plenty of them were not parented with this style. The fact of the matter is there are highly confident, independent kids within that family style, as well as other parenting styles. The premise behind attachment parenting is that kids’ needs are being met in a safe way which allows them to explore. Most of the world outside of the U.S. practices co-sleeping and extended breastfeeding and other attachment parenting principles. Yet, it is the U.S. that has some of the highest incidence of diagnoses of behavioral issues, attention deficit, autism, delinquency, suicide, S.I.D.S., etc. Baby cribs were invented by companies to make a profit. To help sell cribs, U.S. parents were made to feel that co-sleeping was dangerous and wrong. S.I.D.S. deaths were discovered and increased during the decades when baby cribs began to be used more. S.I.D.S. deaths are virtually unknown in some countries. Japan has one of the highest rates of co-sleeping and exclusive breastfeeding and one of the lowest rates of infant mortality and S.I.D.S..
The children I know who have co-slept until age 6 or 7 are highly independent, well mannered and social. They are not clingy. The clingy child is usually one who is not getting those needs met. And, of those families, by age 5 or so, the child was sleeping in their own room at least half of the nights.
It is rare for parents to co-sleep past age 7, so comments about older children are far-fetched. Dads are often supportive of attachment parenting or co-sleeping. My spouse was a part of the decision and was very supportive. He sometimes comments about missing those snuggling times.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
7:13 pm
Kids,
When the time is right, run like heck! Your parent’s are fruitcakes.
P.S. Religion is for weak-minded lemmings.
Twinkletoes
December 2nd, 2012
7:19 pm
There were no arguments in my household about parenting styles; I did it all and he did little except bring home a paycheck. Yes, of course I appreciated the paycheck, but it sure would have been nice to be relieved of the role of heavy every now and then!
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
7:22 pm
When SIDS, and many other afflictions, is proven not be the result of the nanobacteria or nanoviruses heretofore essentially ignored by medical science, acquired through adulterous activity and introduced to the birth canal during gestation, science will have made a great advance. Until then (and always): “The curse causeless shall not come.”
“The sins of the parents are visited on the children,” and according to the Encyclopedia Brittannica “two-thirds of the earth’s cultures practice homosexual rites of passage.”
Let’s try to be the best Americans we can be, by G-d, and not allow the “foreigners do it better” culture mavens of the ruling false elite to turn us into the Third World country they feel we must be for their unjust spiraling concentration of wealth and false wars to be maintained.
Twinkletoes
December 2nd, 2012
7:24 pm
To Garden Diva. I don’t know about other mothers, but being away from my infant for more than 2 hours at least allowed me to get some sleep. Both my babies had colic and sleep was rare. If you haven’t been sleep deprived for a very long time, then you can’t possibly understand the desire to have more than 2 hours of quiet!!!
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
7:36 pm
Seemingly a paradox though a miracle of equal partnership: The father should always, and only, “be the heavy,” with the mother the constant source of unconditional love (even if the mom’s “calling the shots” from behind closed doors with dad): the two acting as a single entity in front of the children. When the mom’s the tough the dad is doing something very wrong, and disturbing, in his life.
George W. Bush’s turning out to be a homosexual psychopath (James Guckert/”Jeff Gannon”; 9/11, firecrackers in frogs, gas-covered cats afire) is no doubt the result of his father’s absence with Jennifer Fitzgerald or killing Kennedy, and his sicko mother’s acting as “the father.”
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
7:39 pm
Will,
Your God is one sick pr:::::ick to punish children for their parent’s, as judged by you, moral failings.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
7:41 pm
Can’t have it both ways, “Twinkletoes.” Staying up with a colicky kid is not so “little.”
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
7:49 pm
The Creator is perfect, infinite, eternal, living, present, ineffable, invisible, holy and righteous. Deal with It.
Karma’s a b…h.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
7:54 pm
Will,
Nice dodge. Why does your creator punish innocent children?
Georgia
December 2nd, 2012
7:58 pm
Most parents end up leading their children deep into the woods, and then leaving them there. Most kids are resourceful enough to find their way back home a couple of times, but then they all wind up in a pie. Parenting is easy if you follow the advice in the book.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
8:08 pm
@Co-sleep anon, “Cloud Atlas,” both book and movie address your question quite well, I do believe.
We aren’t being “punished,” per se, ultimately not by any but our own past conduct, but each mother and father entering the miracle of union has the opportunity to receive it as divine, or not. Each wittingly or unwittingly chooses holiness or defilement.
Would that I knew not of what I speak…but LIfe, like Existence itself, is a miracle to be treasured, a divine Calculus with improvements available to be claimed, should lessons be learned, in each iteration, if not tomorrow.
mom2alex&max
December 2nd, 2012
8:10 pm
@co-sleep: don’t feed the troll.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
8:15 pm
Will,
I appreciate your response. However, it is beyond my comprehension. I’m a doubting Thomas. Proof is in the pudding. I need to taste the pudding.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
8:26 pm
Is the miracle of your child not proof? Each beat of your heart? Each breath?
btw “Mystical union” is available for confirmation if needed. Reading the “Adams-Jefferson Letters,” for instance, is like putting one’s hand in “the wallsocket of G-d,” nor should pre-Hindu Yoga’s “Samadhi” be dismissed. Seek and ye shall find. “Ineffable” is key. And what inveterate depressive rejects enthusiasm? Again…karma…but each child is, in fact, a miracle that only spiritual blind “damaged goods” cannot see.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
8:33 pm
“spiritually” blind damaged goods…obviously
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
8:49 pm
…also, haven’t read this, “Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife,”
Eben Alexander, but my own experience breaking my neck many years ago is consistent with what I’ve read of it: Life is a miracle, and only a single Deity, perfect, infinite, eternal (etc.) is responsible. It’s up to each of us to rediscover this truth, and having a mother and father, holy and righteous, who share this understanding is of course invaluable to the offspring they might parent, giving them a big “headstart” in life.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
8:50 pm
Will,
How ’bout the fart out my hindquarters, is this proof of the Deity?
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:02 pm
Yep. No poop…death ensues. LIfe really is incredible, as is the miracle of the physical form and plane.
Southerners are closer to G-d, Black and White, for having the “Claim it, and share the witness” “function.”
We truly are made in the divine image, but stunted people, “self-justified” perverts, and institutional psychopathy steers us from health and truth.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:03 pm
steer
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
9:09 pm
Will,
Steers and queers make the World go round!
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:17 pm
Jehoshaphat ejected them from Jerusalem in the “Book of Kings.” They moved to Rome and now Bush, Rockefeller and Rothschild are teamed with them as has been Europe’s “Black Aristocracy” for thousands of years we escaped: to end slavery, with us since the Dawn of Time; emancipate women; and to make the People sovereign under the Creator alone, the state servant. The taboos and lies the rapist/pedophiles use to rule are psychotic and unhealthy for little children, for soldiers, women and families, killing innocents, Peace, Truth, Justice and Reason.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
9:22 pm
Will,
Your the cut and paste Medulla oblungata….
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:33 pm
I do believe once an intellectual appreciation is gained of the divine – the Cosmos, a ripe, perfect peach, a good and faithful dog, health, life, the Sun and Moon, the stars, thought, etc. – then one’s awareness and gratitude to the Deity, for it all, should, essentially, become autonomic.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:38 pm
…hence American Exceptionalism’s unique individual sovereignty.
Co-sleep anonymous
December 2nd, 2012
9:40 pm
Will,
Do you believe REM’s album-Automatic for the People, was/is a ode to the Cosmo Deity in he sky?
God
December 2nd, 2012
9:58 pm
@Will Jones
There’s an “O” in my name. My name is not G-dash-d. Please stop misspelling it. I find it offensive.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
9:59 pm
Whether artist, poet, lover…or lunatic, seeing is believing. Holy Matrimony is when both are looking only at the Deity, and at each other. The children benefit accordingly.
Infinite is infinite. Eternal is eternal. Perfect is perfect.
Slade
December 2nd, 2012
10:13 pm
Willy,
I’m with ya’. when I saw Connie Davidson’s boobies in 1989-I saw Gawd!
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
10:14 pm
Proven by stoppering the Pontifex Maximus’ first sound with a bolt of lightning, clap of thunder and sky turned to water on September 11, 1987, at Tamiami Stadium, the Deity worshipped by America’s Deist Founders certainly does have a sense of humor, so probably isn’t offended by your pretense, “9:58.”
I don’t pretend to be able to spell correctly the common three-letter name of the Creator of the universe as I am imperfect and wish to impart a sense of Its ineffable, unknowable nature, and my regard for Its holiness.
Will Jones - Atlanta Jeffersonian Exegesis
December 2nd, 2012
10:24 pm
@Slade, If we were born perfect life would be real boring.
A woman, holy and righteous, is a miracle from G-d.
Creation is a miracle, but the way we evolve is dependent upon the soul behind those “boobies,” and, as it turns out, the discipline which makes one a man.
Hope all was/is well. We should each learn something new each day, and tomorrow’s another day.
Mayim Bialik of ‘The Big Bang Theory’ files for divorce – Examiner.com | The Divorced Parents
December 3rd, 2012
2:06 pm
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