Study: Kids’ TV shows full of bullying

A new study has found that many of the 50 most popular shows for kids 2 to 11 in 2005 (many of which still air today) featured regular acts of social and verbal aggression.

The list included a variety of children’s shows such as “Hannah Montana,” “Suite Life of Zack & Cody,” “SpongeBob SquarePants” and a few adult shows (“American Idol,” “Survivor,” “The Simple Life 3”).

About 92 percent of 150 episodes reviewed featured some form of “social aggression” —averaging about 14 incidents per hour.

About 80 percent of the shows featured physical bullying.

From HealthDay via the Poughkeepsie Journal:

“Lots of attention has been paid to exposure to nudity and violence in the media, and rightfully so,” said study lead author Nicole Martins, an assistant professor in the department of telecommunications at Indiana University. “But parents are largely unaware that programs could be teaching children to be cruel and mean to each other as well. Just because a show is low on physical violence doesn’t mean it’s harmless.”…

“Social aggression is pretty prevalent,” Martins said. Females tend to perpetrate it, she noted, and they are often attractive…

“Martins acknowledged that TV shows wouldn’t be very interesting to watch if everybody behaved properly and treated each other with respect…”

“I’m not saying get rid of the conflict. No one wants to watch that,” she said. “I’d challenge people in the industry to think about how they portray these aggressive behaviors and at least show that the victim is hurt by the comments.”

I do notice that often when I am watching TV with the kids I’ll say you know we don’t do this or say that. They usually nod at me and say we know. (Because I do say it a lot.)

Do you notice physical and verbal bullying on TV shows? Do you ever comment to your kids, “Hey we know what you’re seeing is not OK, right?” Do you think what they are watching influences your kids’ treatment of others?

68 comments Add your comment

Penguinmom

October 4th, 2012
3:53 am

There are some kids shows my kids aren’t allowed to watch specifically because I think the interaction between the main characters isn’t really positive (or the jokes are so very lame that I think they bring your intelligence down a few notches just listening too them). I’d rather my kids watch slightly more violent shows (action heroes type shows) that at least portray a very clear good vs evil.

When my kids were much younger, we watched a lot of Backyardigans (everyone is encouraging), Blues Clues, Little Bear (not sure you can get more polite) and other shows that had fairly polite, kind-hearted characters. Their list of approved shows has expanded quite a bit since then but I still have a list of ‘why would you even want to watch that’ shows that my kids know not to watch. (They are allowed to watch them at Grandma’s when all bets are pretty much off. My daughter will come home from their semi-annual visits and say “we watched so-and-so because my cousin wanted to and it was really lame and not at all nice just like you said it would be.”) I don’t personally find watching people insult/bully each other very entertaining and, so far, my kids really don’t either.

I do think you have to watch the shows with your kids at least occasionally so you can judge what you need to address as far as what they are seeing happen.

Jeff

October 4th, 2012
7:48 am

I seem to recall one of the greatest movies ever made centered around bullying……The Karate Kid.

What I DON’T remember was a bunch of hand wringers talking about how kids maybe shouldn’t go see the movie or that the moms had to sit down with the kids after “young Daniel-san” whupped that guys behind and lecture the children on bullying.

I’ll step down now, have a nice day!

CC

October 4th, 2012
8:12 am

Bullying is a terrible aggression and has been around forever…even in TV shows and movies. You have to teach your child how to deal with a bully and make sure they are not one. Being a good person is built in that foundation you give your child at home. In some instances I think bullying episodes may help so kids see they are not alone. Bullying is no longer just a school yard thing that stops at the end of the school day, now kids are accessible via text and social media 24/7. That why it is so very important to teach your kids about being bullied and being a bully.

Me

October 4th, 2012
8:20 am

Agree that bullying has been around forever – and while I certainly don’t condone it – it seems that the good ole USofA is rearing nothing but a bunch of wusses now — Of course, it isn’t right to bully someone but why can kids today not simply deal with it as we did when we were growing up? Hell, most of the time back “in my day” it’s doubtful that the parents were even made aware simply because to tell our parents implied something of a weakness in ourselves.

Mayhem

October 4th, 2012
8:23 am

Children have been bullying adults in TV shows for YEARS. The kids are always in control and make the parents look stupid in these shows.

Bullying is a part of life. It will NEVER go away. Some people chose to be bullys, all through life…..I see it every day!!!

Voice of Reason

October 4th, 2012
8:24 am

From the dawn of time TV has been the chief influence on all human behavior. There is no possible way that human beings could have developed any negative or destructive tenancies without the influence of TV, video games, and music. These things are the Devil!

Will someone please think of the children?

Voice of Reason

October 4th, 2012
8:32 am

I wonder what TV show Hitler was watching when he decided to invade Poland.

Jessica

October 4th, 2012
8:36 am

I think context matters here. If a program for kids shows bullying in a negative light (they are clearly in the wrong or are somehow made to regret their actions) then I don’t see a problem with it. I’m a lot more troubled by the shows that make cruel behavior seem normal and acceptable.
On the other hand, that’s just life. Bullies existed long before television, and the current anti-bullying campaign won’t fix that. I actually think it will make things worse — just about any less-than-ideal social interaction is now labeled as bullying, so the word is beginning to lose its meaning. It’s going to reach the point where kids who are victims of real bullying will be ignored because thin-skinned whiners have co-opted the word and made a joke out of it.

Jeff

October 4th, 2012
8:47 am

I see it as nothing more than the trendy topic of the day. Much like the previous topics of the day; eating disorder, dyfunctional family, self esteem, homelessness, bipolar, manic-derpressive, yada yada yada.

Notice all those trendy issues of the day seem to come from the same types of people? People trying to sell you magazine headlines, counselling sessions, sleep meds, talk show ratings…………..

Mayhem

October 4th, 2012
8:54 am

What needs to happen, is we need to teach our kids to stand up for themselves, and not back down when a bully “attacks”. Bullys will bully until someone puts them in their place.

People will treat you the way you ALLOW them to treat you. My kids know how to defend themselves.

@Me is right – we are raising a bunch of wussies……teach your kids to defend themselves, not to run and tattle when someone does or says something to hurt their precious little feelings. GROW UP and deal with it!!!!

Metro Coach

October 4th, 2012
8:59 am

There was a time when bullies were dealt with by a punch in the nose and a subsequent brawl. Whether the bully won or lost, usually he or she moved on to another target because the previous target had taken all they cared to take. Now, kids are threatened with jail time and parents with lawsuits every time somebody’s fingernail gets broken. Adults no longer teach kids the skills to deal with issues amongst themselves, and when they take matters into their own hands adults chastise them for it. Its the wussification of America in a nutshell.

mom2alex&max

October 4th, 2012
9:03 am

I had banned Drake and Josh due to how horrible their witch of a sister is. I don’t want them to have examples of siblings being that way with each other. It’s a shame, because I think the brothers’ relationship is kinda sweet (for two teen boys anyways)

Techmom

October 4th, 2012
9:06 am

First a rise in smoking and now a rise bullying. How about we just turn the TV off?

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
9:10 am

The Karate Kid was one of the greatest movies ever made?

Not me

October 4th, 2012
9:12 am

Four and five year olds do not have the mental capacity to “GROW UP and deal with it”. Bullying can and does start that young. Being in a pre-k class I spent lots of time going over acceptable and unacceptable behavior. When children admitted they learned an unacceptable behavior from TV or at home, I told them they were not to act that way in the classroom. Our classroom would be a place of kindness. We would help our friends feel happy and not sad. If they wanted to say or do mean things, they could do it at home.

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
9:13 am

I’d like to kick the ass of every person that hangs up one of those “No Bullying Zone” signs.

Whirled Peas

October 4th, 2012
9:17 am

Next thing you know they will ban the road runner who drops a safe on the head of the coyote. Some people will not stop until all the boys become gay.

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
9:18 am

@VOR, two thumbs up!!!
I also wonder what John Wilkes Booth was watching on TV when he decided to shoot Lincoln.

Or what had the U.S. policy makers seen on TV as children that made them think the seclusion and internment of Japanese Americans following the bombing of Pearl Habor was a good idea…..damn TV.

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
9:21 am

@WP, you lost me on that one. Bullys aren’t gay, but everyone else is? Was that your point?

Jeff

October 4th, 2012
9:55 am

Well Jarvis, as a pre-teen movie, Karate Kid was one of the better ones. Although I don’t think it’s in the same legendary class as one of the Debbie Does….

At least, from what I read on that world wide web thingy.

Denise

October 4th, 2012
10:28 am

@Jeff – Bipolar disorder is much more than a trending topic. If or when you have to deal with it yourself or with someone you love, get back with me about it. Those of US who deal with it on a daily basis would appreciate a little sensitivity and credit for not being a wuss just because we have a disorder, please and thank you. /off my soapbox/

I agree with the fact that the word bullying is being used inappropriately. Being mean is not the same as bullying. Some people are just not nice. And some people just don’t like you. Some people gossip and give others a hard time. Saying you don’t like someone’s shoes does not mean you are bullying someone but we have gotten to the point where we have kids going to the teacher for every bit of criticism they get from a classmate and yelling “bully” when it’s really “b!tch”. I also agree that we need to teach children how to stand up for themselves to the best of their abilities. Fighting back may not be the wisest course of action but sometimes a good punch in the face will back a bully down. They don’t usually like to be challenged, especially the ones that just talk a bunch of noise. The ones who physically bully might enjoy the fight so you might need a bat. (My mama told us never to fight fair, sorry. Don’t pull a knife but you know what I mean. Pick up something and go in if you have to.) People who are truly bullied need to be believed and helped but there are those diluting the meaning so much that true bullying may be taken lightly because the person in the position of authority is all “been there done that and it was nothing”.

mystery poster

October 4th, 2012
10:59 am

Ha ha, everyone remember when Ralphie finally attacks his bully in “A Christmas Story”? Hilarious.

How about the TV show “Freaks and Geeks.” They decide the only way to get their bully to leave them alone is to fight him, in a fantastic scene with the lyrics “oh mama, I’m in fear for my life..” playing in the background. Some other bullying scenes in that show are very hard to watch, when the older girl Kim is bullying Sam. Almost painful.

What about Bart Simpson, he enlists Grandpa and (crazy guy) Herman to wage an all-out war on his bully Nelson. At the end they all have cupcakes.

Bullies have been here forever, and despite the campaign, will continue to be. How well did that “this is your brain on drugs” campaign work out?

Jeff

October 4th, 2012
11:09 am

Denise, I’m sure it is a difficult thing to deal with. But the point was bipolar is no longer a trendy catchphrase with the kids like bullying. It was at one time, and so were the others I mentioned.

JOD

October 4th, 2012
11:13 am

Well-said, VOR and Jeff. I haven’t posted much recently because I feel my answer is mostly the same: No, because it’s part of parenting, not just kids mimicking what they see on TV or in a movie.

@Not me – Agree. There is one ‘bully’ (or just aggressive kid) in DD’s pre-K class, and while it just burns me up to hear how he treats my daughter and other kids, the best thing I can do is try to equip DD to deal with him (although I have mentioned it to the Director). She knows she doesn’t have to play with him and can tell him to leave her alone if he is being mean. The school can talk to me if they have problems with that.

Denise

October 4th, 2012
11:18 am

Okay, parents. I have a question and I’m asking for understanding. Would you consider a kid mean or a bully if he treats more than one kid in an aggressive way? Would you encourage your kid to handle him/her the same way as you would if it was just one-one-one? Would you consider it more serious if it was systemic rather than just with your kid? At what point would you tell your kid to involve an adult? (I guess that is more than one question.)

FCM on my cell

October 4th, 2012
11:35 am

First, Spoge Bob literally rots your brain. Somebody did research. I did not allowit on at my house. Second, the parents in those shows are written as the most clueless morons on earth. That bothers me more than a bully. Third, the bullies in thoae shows usually get their cumuppance, they are not seen as heroes. Most importantly,.if your child thinks life should be like tv, or that tv show social behavior is right…you should turn off the tv and go to the park.

Penguinmom

October 4th, 2012
12:14 pm

@jeff – I think one difference between the Karate Kid movie and the shows she is talking about is that, in the Karate Kid, the bullies were Clearly the bad guys. In some of the TV shows, the popular kids or even some of the main weekly characters bully other kids. To me there is a difference between having someone ‘bad’ do something bad and having a central ‘good’ character engage in bad behavior regularly.

@FCM – clueless parents on TV drive me crazy! I really limit the shows that have that stereotype.

Penguinmom

October 4th, 2012
12:21 pm

I hadn’t realized this is ‘anti-bully’ month. My eldest asked me why there was so much advertising about bullying recently after seeing yet another anti-bully billboard. We discussed whether it is a ‘new’ thing or if it is just people are more aware/making a bigger deal of it. I do think kids today may be less empathetic than kids in previous generations. There is a little less caring for others. Also parents today are waaaay more involved in their kids’ emotional life than parents in previous generations.

Interesting that my son (16) couldn’t remember having ever been bullied or even teased beyond friendly teasing. I do think he has had a couple of instances (based on things he said to me at the time) but I’m glad they didn’t really make a huge impact on him. I know homeschooling has limited his bullying because there are always parents around even in large group activities so nothing gets too out of hand. And his group of classmates at our local co-op is really accepting of each other even though they have a huge range of different interests, different abilities and different personalities.

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
1:15 pm

What were Fred and Daphne doing while Scooby, Shag and Thelma were split off?

jarvis

October 4th, 2012
1:16 pm

Or was that little guy’s name Velma?

Mayhem

October 4th, 2012
1:33 pm

Fred bullied Barney.

Ralph Cramden ALWAYS bullied Norton. And not to mention he ALWAYS bullied Alice, by threatening “boom, pow, to the Moon Alice” with his fist…

The Three Stooges bullied each other.

MeanGirls were Bullies

Skipper bullied Gilligan.

Bullying has been around FOREVER!!!! It teaches how to deal with unpleasant situations/people. It’s the new pansy generation that wants every one to be the same and not hurt their precious little flowers.

catlady

October 4th, 2012
2:00 pm

I have noticed that many sitcoms have children speaking in nasty ways to their parents, without any apparent consequences. And we teachers wonder why they bring that attitude to school. I will not be spoken to as though I am a disobedient dog!

Mike

October 4th, 2012
3:10 pm

Isn’t this Banned Books Week?

Most banned books have ideas that parents don’t want to explain to their children – occult, sex, drinking, tolerance of people with different beliefs…

How is this any different? Bullying happens, and kids witness it and experience it, even if they’re not telling their parents. Watching a show where people are bullied may inspire them to talk about it and learn how to deal with it (or not to be a bully if they recognize that behavior in themselves).

mom2alex&max

October 4th, 2012
5:20 pm

Mike: it depends how the bullying is portrayed. If it is shown as a lesson on how to deal with it, it is shown as NOT a cool thing, then yes, kids learn from it. If it shown as cool thing to do, or with no real consequences and in some cases even rewarding it, then no it’s not a good thing.

In Drake and Josh that little b!tch of a sister constantly berates and bullies her older brothers and ALWAYS gets away with it and sometimes even gets rewarded for it. That kinda of caca will not be allowed in my house.

Kat

October 4th, 2012
7:12 pm

@jarvis: I can agree that The Karate Kid was one of the best “here’s why you shouldn’t bully” and “learning karate can be helpful or take you right into the lions’ den” movies, but I agree with you that labeling it as one of the best movies ever is quite a stretch.

Too many parents use their TVs, DVRs, DVD boxed sets, games to “parent” in their absence (whether literally or not).

Vlad

October 4th, 2012
8:13 pm

Where is that Size 12, 175 pound Mother Jane Goose with her opinions?

People have sparred with that lady for over 5 years on this blog. Can so many people for so long be so wrong?

cobbmom

October 5th, 2012
7:39 am

God blessed me with the gift of gab and a razor sharp wit, in school if I ever heard someone making fun of another student because of their looks, clothes, economic status, size, etc. I would use my mouth to insult the bully until they cried. Yep, I was a bully bully. Years later when I was at my high school for an event a teacher asked me if I was still bullying the bullies. She, and other staff members, knew what I was doing but I was never reproached for it because I was able to do what they couldn’t under the restraints of their jobs. A couple of the bullies parents actually had the audacity to call my mom to complain, they quickly found out from whom I had gotten my training.

Having said all of that, with social media available from elementary school bullying has increased. Students are able to harrass from a distance and anonymously. Parents have stopped monitoring their children’s communications and there are no limits. Children actually believe they can behave like the TV characters they see and unfortunately we do have a population of parents who do mirror the idiotic parents on these shows. I firmly believe the average IQ in America decreases each year.

M.E.

October 5th, 2012
8:57 am

Bullying on adult TV sitcoms has been around for generations but I think I first really noticed it with the Golden Girls. The four ladies put each other down with a zinger at every opportunity, and then they’re back to good friends in the end. Very unrealistic, but it set the tone for many, many sitcoms to follow for both children’s and adults’ shows. Kids shows seem to mix verbal zingers with Three Stooges physical abuse and call it appropriate behavior….as entertainment. Each should come with a warning: “Kids…don’t try this at home unless you’re a professional bully.”

itpdude

October 5th, 2012
10:00 am

There is a huge difference between kids who are exposed to a lot of tv vs. kids who are not exposed to a lot of tv.

The kids who watch a lot of tv tend to be way into fast food, bad language, and poor behavior.

jarvis

October 5th, 2012
10:34 am

I’m going to need to see your data itpdude.

FCM

October 5th, 2012
11:47 am

WOW 132 comments all week. Did we finally run out of stuff to talk about?

Here is one we can discuss: I had a parent/teacher conference yesterday. The teachers (elementary school) looked like an old navy add. Cords and jersey shirts. They did not present a professional image at all. In fact, I had a hard time believing these were “professionals”. Now I know I went to a private school so they probably had a different dress code there….but even the mid 80s in public school the teachers were always in slacks with button downs or dresses. Usually in business suits. How in the world can you expect a kid to look up to, respect, take seriously ect someone who dresses as bad (or worse) as the student? Do you think that since one is fairly young it is because they got to wear PJs to college classes? Do they just not care anymore? I cannot imagine what the heck the schools are thinking to let teachers do that.

(yes catlady and other teachers might set my head on fire for this, but I just want to know….especially from Catlady who probably has worked through the transitions of teacher dress code).

jarvis

October 5th, 2012
12:47 pm

@FCM, if it helps, my wife’s shool is only allowed to wear jeans on Friday (with a school t-shirt on). The rest of the time she has to be wear a dress…skirt….slacks.

motherjanegoose

October 5th, 2012
1:54 pm

I did not comment on the kid’s shows and bullying because no one here watches kid’s shows and thus I have no idea what is going on with them.

@ FCM…I agree that the line of professional dress has been crossed. Obviously, you cannot be an effective Kinder teacher in a silk blouse and high heels but some teachers do not seem to have a clue.

I do not even wear jeans on the airplane. Not my style for travel and also due to the fact that I could be upgraded to First Class and want to look nice if I sit next to a businessman or woman. Show some respect to someone who may have paid $1000.00 for their ticket. I do think respect is evaporating but that is another topic for another day!

kimmer

October 5th, 2012
2:09 pm

Not surprised because bullying is a trait inherent to human behavior (and animal behavior for that matter). Children bully children. Adults bully adults. Adults bully children. Children sometimes bully adults. Bosses bully subordinates. Businesses bully businesses. Countries bully countries. You get the picture. Not everyone mind you but it is common and has been from time immemorial.

Bottom line. Almost everyone WILL face a bully at some point in their lives and children should be taught how to deal with it as well as not to be a bully. I have no issue with bullying being shown in children’s TV shows provided it helps teach those lessons and does not glorify the behavior.

Sarah

October 5th, 2012
2:21 pm

my comment won’t go thru… not sure why. :(

Mayhem

October 5th, 2012
2:49 pm

MJG I am NOT going to dress up for an airplane just in case I get into First Class. Any idiot who pays $1,000 for a seat is a fool and I don’t care what THEY think about me. As a matter of fact, I really don’t care what ANYONE thinks of me. I am my own person and I alone am responsible for MY happiness. I don’t give a rat’s butt what some fool on an airplane thinks.

I dress for comfort and for me. When I travel, I am as comfortable as possible.

Mayhem

October 5th, 2012
2:50 pm

I have NO respect for anyone who pays for First class. They are all snobs anyway. We are all on the same plane, and will arrive at our destination at the same time.

HB

October 5th, 2012
3:30 pm

I doubt that business people in first class care how other passengers are dressed other than maybe a tad envious that they can’t dress comfortably because they have to go straight to a meeting when they get off the plane (at least that’s how I’ve felt when I’ve had to fly in formal work clothes). I find the idea of being more respectful to someone who paid more for a ticket than I did odd — it’s the airline’s job to make them feel special, not mine. I try to treat everyone with courtesy regardless of “class”, dress in a way I feel is comfortable and and appropriate (usually in jeans for travel), and can’t imagine having special reverence for someone just because they are wearing business attire. If that makes me disrespectful, so be it.

FCM

October 5th, 2012
4:10 pm

I try to dress nice on a plane period. Usually I am headed out for business but if it is family/friends picking me up I want to look nice then too. But then, my sister-in-law asked me this past weekend while she was visiting: “How come I have never seen you in a tee shirt?” I said you mean like one that has a logo on it? She said yeah, do you even own them? I said yeah I wear them at my house. I have one that says “Save the Earth, It’s the Only Planet that has Beer!” But I was coming over here (my parents) to see you guys and figured we might go out so I didn’t wear it. Now she always dresses like, it is seldom I see her in shirt and pants that are not tees. That is ok too, we are just different (and also there is a 16 years age difference…again could that be it?) I think she is one of the GREATEST people I ever met so I am just happy she visits.

@Jarvis, thanks good to know.

motherjanegoose

October 5th, 2012
4:42 pm

@FCM…ditto on the t-shirt…I rarely wear them. I read an article, in a travel journal, that when they are looking at customers to upgrade…they often look at the attire. It stuck with me.

HB…I guess I figure that there would not be many planes flying if everyone out there payed $199 r/t. I believe it is the business customers and those who pay the first class ticket fees that might keep an airline in business. I am impressed with people who work hard for their company and travel to learn innovative things. Being away from home and your family is not for the faint of heart. These are generally committed folks. Just my opinion.

@ Mayhem…that “idiot” could be your Doctor, coming home from a Medical Conference. He or She may need to assimilate the information they learned without having a 2 year old dump Cheerios/Apple Juice all over everything . Since I do fly at least 50 legs per year, I see a lot of different kinds of folks. It is quite evident that some do not care what anyone else things. I am lucky that they are usually not in my row, as they cannot book the premium seats with a bargain ticket. I like all kinds of people. I also appreciate courtesy, repsect and kindness. I have met interesting folks in my journies ( sp?).

Denise

October 5th, 2012
5:01 pm

I’ll never get an upgrade if it’s based on my attire. I’m going to be as comfortable as possible, which most certainly will involve a long sundress or jeans. (Winter is going to SUCK! I hate traveling with COATS!)

I agree the we as a society have gotten too casual. My general rule is not to wear anything I wouldn’t want our company president to see me in. I break it on occasion but i try not to even walk down the hall when I don’t look as nice as I think I should. It does not make me feel like I’m at WORK, you know? A pair of slacks and a blouse doesn’t take more effort than a pair of jeans. When I do dress down it’s because something needs ironing and I don’t have the time. (Procrastination is my middle name.)

HB

October 5th, 2012
5:11 pm

You’re too funny! No, first-class customers paying more for individual seats do not keep airlines in business. The fact is, no where near enough people can pay that much, so airlines do depend on sales of more affordable tickets. First class sections also rarely sell out — upgrading loyal customers actually helps to sell more coach tickets. And then you have Southwest, currently one of the most financially stable airlines, which does not even offer first or business class seats. Airlines should give first-class passengers special treatment because that’s what they pay for, but the idea that “lesser” passengers should show them greater respect because they keep airlines afloat and make it possible for the rest of us to fly cheap is really silly.

As for committed folks, twenty of my hardworking, dedicated colleagues and I will be flying to our annual conference later this month to help others become better educators and get a little professional development for ourselves. We will all fly in jeans so when we land we can immediately begin prep work, which involves a lot of box lugging and unpacking. Over 1,500 people from our field will gather to share ideas and learn innovative things, and I bet I will see no more than 15 people dressed in suits. Of course, few, if any of us will fly first-class since our field is mostly nonprofit and small business, but I think the airlines probably appreciate the nearly 1,000 $200-500 domestic tickets plus a few hundred international tickets that we have purchased. You may not be impressed by us, but no worries — that’s not really our goal. ;)

motherjanegoose

October 5th, 2012
6:18 pm

@ HB…see that is the beauty of our world. My chiropractor tells me that she cannot wait to see me as I am one of the few people who make her laugh. Many hire me for my expertise. Some here think I am nuts. I am not impressed by some folks while others do impress me a great deal. Personal grooming is a big deal, to me. Others may think it is overrated. To each his own.

I had this ( casual dress) conversation with my daughter, as it irks me when I see HS and College aged kids who attend church in slouchy outfits. She reminded me that God does not care what we wear. A fair point. I then mentioned this to a Lutheran Pastor. I loved his response…”If you were going to stand before a judge in court, would you roll in wearing your pajamas with messy hair and a slouch? No, you say? Perhaps God does deserve that respect too, after what he has done for you.”

I am not an expert on airlines but I do know that many cities have been knocked off the flight list as they are not profitable. The cities that have a large portion of business travelers seem safe. Many frequent business travelers do not like Southwest. Of course, I do not know everyone.

mother jane blah

October 5th, 2012
9:59 pm

Blow me Mother Jane Goose

M.E.

October 5th, 2012
10:42 pm

So, wasn’t this conversation supposed to be about bullying in kids’ shows?

motherjanegoose

October 6th, 2012
8:48 am

@ M.E. we did not have a new topic on Friday and things were kind of slow for the week, so FCM asked a question. We can do that here. The answer to your question is…YES…on Thursday and sometimes we ask new questions if anyone has something they want to toss in to the ring. Especially, if the topic at hand was kind of slow and has been there for a while. Does that help? Enjoy your weekend.

Atlanta Mom

October 6th, 2012
10:23 am

Here’s an idea. Instead of watching TV with the kids, just turn it off.

irisheyes

October 6th, 2012
1:06 pm

CM, you are very rarely going to see me in a skirt. I’m with seven year olds all day, and I may be sitting with them on the floor while they read to me, or helping a child up off of the ground at recess, or opening ketchup packets (or syrup, or BBQ sauce, or those god-awful Gogurts) that can and do squirt on me, or using dry erase markers to write on the classroom whiteboards or individual whiteboards as I help a child with a math problem. Yes, I am a professional, but I believe in dressing for my environment. We don’t knock nurses for wearing scrubs, do we?

irisheyes

October 6th, 2012
1:06 pm

Sorry, that was for FCM (not sure why the first letter vanished!).

motherjanegoose

October 6th, 2012
1:32 pm

@ irisheyes…I am with 2-7 year olds most days of my life and wear skirts at least 50 % of the time. I also wear clothes that can easily be washed. Now if you are talking about a pencil slim mini skirt, that could well be a problem. At 53, those are not on my radar.

When it is cooler, I love to wear black tights and get the L’eggs kind at Walgreens when they are BOGO. Great with a black knit dress/jumper ( I have several) and some fun jewelry ( which kids love…I have a pumpkin scarf now).

I once met a teacher from New Jersey. We talked about dress code. She asked me if we had to wear NYLONS to school. This was about 6 years ago. She was in her early 40s. I told her that I NEVER wear nylons…haha and rarely pantyhose. I try to get a tan on my legs and love to wear sandals. She told me that, in their inner city school, they were not allowed to go bare legged. THEY ALSO HAD NO AIR CONDITIONING. YIKES! I learn all sorts of things about the differences across the country. If that were the case here… I would wear pants but you would still need socks. Yuck.

**rolls eyes**

October 7th, 2012
4:24 pm

no bullying but let your girls dress like hookers but then get mad when snide comments are made

**rolls eyes**

October 7th, 2012
4:25 pm

HB is a bully her self.. and a freaking know it all

djs_NC

October 7th, 2012
4:55 pm

these kinds of shows have been around for years-just like ones showing kids being disresprectul of adults and everyone thinking its funny. whats new?

Ghoti

October 7th, 2012
10:15 pm

Public school teachers don’t have a lot of money to spend on expensive clothing. If I was a teacher, I would dress according to the conventions of the job, which includes getting dirty in many cases. Waste money on uncomfortable clothing that has to be dry-cleaned?

If skirts and nylons were so great, men would wear them. Ugh. Give me jeans or pants every time, with a comfortable, washable top. I don’t dress up unless I have to. I dress for myself, not for others, especially on airplanes. Why would you dress up to be stuck in an airplane seat?

Ghoti

October 7th, 2012
10:23 pm

And, just because someone paid more for their airline ticket than I did, I’m supposed to somehow think they’re better than I am? That would be NO.

Mike

October 7th, 2012
11:59 pm

Ghoti, neither are you better than them.

The way you dress shows how much you respect yourself and the people you’ll be interacting with.

This would be an interesting topic that’s actually related to kids – does a disdain for dressing up come from parents?

If your parents don’t value dressing up, then you’re going to grow up getting nice clothes only when you have to go to a big event like a relative’s wedding or graduation, and you’ll have that for any “nice” events until you’re busting out of it and they have to break down and buy you something new. So dressed-up clothes are associated with boring events and being too tight.

A friend was stunned when I told him that dress shirts come in different collar sizes. Buy clothes that fit and they’re not uncomfortable.

motherjanegoose

October 8th, 2012
10:02 am

@ Ghoti…there was a time when everyone dressed up to ride on an airplane…perhaps that was before you were born? I remember it well.

There was also a time when folks at restaurants dressed up and had conversations instead of playing with their phones and texting the entire meal…sigh…that is sad sight to me.

@ Mike…thanks: The way you dress shows how much you respect yourself and the people you’ll be interacting with. I find this to be very true.

Mayhem

October 8th, 2012
2:40 pm

I must not have much respect for myself, as I am 95% of the time in jeans and tee shirts. Flip flops are my shoes, I don’t even own a pair of heels…….Oh dear, I hope I never run into MJG…I’m sure she will look down her nose at me. Especially if I’m in first class and she’s in coach…won’t be getting must respect from her on that plane.