Would you shoot boudoir photos for Valentine’s Day?

Apparently Facebook ads think I am the right demographic to shoot boudoir photos for my husband for Valentine’s Day.

Every time I check in on Facebook there’s an ad of semi-naked lady lying on a bed with a big heart across her breasts.

So I think it’s a great question this close to Valentine’s Day: Would you do sexy shots for your husband/boyfriend? Would he appreciate them? Would he be surprised that you did it? Would you trust the photographer with the digital negatives?

What are other good Valentine’s Day presents that would be personal/sexy but wouldn’t involve you taking off your clothes? Would you want shots of your hubby?

62 comments Add your comment

K's mom

February 10th, 2012
7:36 am

Uh…no to boudoir shots all around. Totally not my thing to give or receive. I am not even a huge Valentine’s Day fan. I will say that the hubs surprised me by hiring a babysitter for tonight and planned an evening out. That is the best V-day present for me because he put thought into it and all I have to do is show up! GREAT present!

ABC

February 10th, 2012
7:40 am

Uh, no, definitely no.

Will you share the result with us...

February 10th, 2012
7:53 am

Voice of Reason

February 10th, 2012
7:58 am

Honestly as nice as it would be to have pictures of my wife wearing sexy lingerie, particularly the pin-up girl stuff, the real thing is just so much better. Plus it’s not like you could show those pictures to anyone else.

Not to mention you’d have to store the pictures someplace where no one else in the family might accidentally find them? And what if they did find them? What then?

Nope too much hassle to be worth it.

motherjanegoose

February 10th, 2012
8:02 am

No. @ K’s mom…that is such a nice surprise…hope you both have a wonderful time alone!

Fred

February 10th, 2012
8:03 am

As an early valentines thing, my wife took the day off and planned a little date. Guess who got sick? That’s right, the little girl. She didn’t even know that mommy had this planned.

(update: The wife just told me that she told the little scamp last night which is why she is skeptical. I dunno, she felt feverish to me this morning.)

We never get a break……..

A

February 10th, 2012
8:16 am

Yet another reason you won’t find me on Facebook. Ads, really? That’s why I use Ad Block Plus on all my browsers.

K's mom

February 10th, 2012
8:22 am

@MJG, GREAT surprise and we went out last weekend so it was a real surprise. We usually get a babysitter once a month, but to have the evening out planned…FABULOUS!

I will add that I use our wedding photographer once a year for family pictures. She charges a sitting fee and gives me the CD of photos. Although, I would trust her to do this type of photo, I would rather spend the $250 on photos that will hang in our home of all of us instead of paying for something that will sit in the top of the closet so that they do not creep my kids and other family members out!

Cayce C

February 10th, 2012
8:33 am

As a long time Atlanta boudoir photographer (although that’s not my ad you describe), I can assure you that many women do shoot them for their husbands and significant others. And if the feedback I get from my clients is any indication, it’s a very welcome gift.

That said, it’s not necessarily for everyone and all boudoir photographers are not created equal. The range is from very tasteful to full out girls gone wild. So if you’re considering it, look over the galleries thoroughly to make sure you’re comfortable with the style of the photographer. Photography is the ultimate in what you see is what you get, so make sure you can imagine yourself in the photos. Then have a conversation with the photographer (not their assistant) and get a sense of how comfortable you will feel with them.

As to digital negatives, make sure you’re not automatically allowing your photographer to use your images for publicity. Photographers, by law, retain copyright to their images, so if you don’t want your images used in public, get it in writing. I have an opt in policy and it’s in the contract everyone signs before they work with me – I won’t use your images without written permission. I work with a lot of prominent women and I have no desire to ruin someone’s career.

Lastly, pro lighting, cameras and lenses show more than you are going to want to see. Make sure your photographer retouches the images you get. My clients feel great about themselves after seeing their images. That’s a big part of my job and while it’s more work, it’s worth it when I receive the emails thanking me for the experience.

jarvis

February 10th, 2012
8:40 am

I’m with Voice of Reason.

Terrible gift. I love looking at my wife, but what am I going to do with boudoir photos of her? Put them in a drawer under lock and key so no one else can ever find them?

  

February 10th, 2012
8:51 am

Uh, no, definitely no.

I feel sorry for anyone married to a woman with this type of attitude. I really do.

If you can’t do something hot & sexy for your husband (doesn’t have to be just photos, could be something else nice), just remember that there are a lot of women out there who won’t be so prudish.

Stacey

February 10th, 2012
8:51 am

Definitely not for me. Even if I would have considered it in the past, rarely a week goes by when you don’t hear of someone (celebrities, politicians, clergymen, etc) who are brought down by racy pictures being posted on the internet. Who knows, I might decide I want to throw my hat in the ring for the 2012 presidential race. :-D

Lori

February 10th, 2012
8:54 am

Nope, would never do something like that. When exactly would my husband be able to enjoy such a photo?? If being a good wife and mother isn’t sexy enough for my husband, well I guess too bad!! I see him watching me with my baby sometimes. I think being an great mother is what he finds attractive, more than anything else I could do.

I got him something simple this year for valentines day. He loves Carrabba’s food, and there are a few dishes that he would love for me to be able to make at home. We’ve tried to find copy cat recipes but never could. But a couple of months ago the restaurant put out a cookbook that includes his favorite dishes. I bought him the book and I plan to cook his favorite meal for Valentines day. He’ll be sooooo happy :-)

Techmom

February 10th, 2012
9:03 am

I know several people who have done them but nope, not for me.

jarvis

February 10th, 2012
9:06 am

@Lori, I love that my wife is a great mother. It really is one of the things I love about her, but don’t get my loving her in that way confused with the things I find sexy about her.

There are many things about my wife that turn me on, but her ability to help with homework and do laundry aren’t among them. We appreciate those things on a different level.

Not Convinced

February 10th, 2012
9:28 am

@Cayce C…I have done some boudoir photgraphy (though I am not a pro) and you are on point with all that you have typed here. It is not for everyone andit tastefully done the photos make a great gift for your husband or s/o. Not all boudoir photos are relegated to the top shelf in the back of the closet…many are hung as art for the clients’ (get this) master bedroom (gasp!). Not everyone is bashful or ashamed of the human body in its natural form. Pro photgraphy lighting and equipment will show many of your imperfections so retouching should be done. Even the most fit person may have a dimple or two that they do not wish to be in their photos.

jarvis

February 10th, 2012
9:50 am

@Not Convinced, so which is it? Not ashamed of the human body in its natural form or is airbrushing needed?

Augusta

February 10th, 2012
9:50 am

I don’t need a sexy picture of me for my husband. We have a very imtimate marriage, and we don’t need “visuals” to help in that department. Not that I’m opposed to doing it, but it just isn’t necessary for us. We have, and always will, put our marriage/intimacy as a priority.

Denise

February 10th, 2012
9:53 am

Cayce C – do you only do boudoir photos? I’m looking to do a pre-40 shoot (turning 40 next year) for fun.

A

February 10th, 2012
10:01 am

Just because some of us wouldn’t consider doing these photos doesn’t mean we don’t do things for our husbands. Maybe we are not into this type of exhibitionism and instead prefer private, intimate moments with our SO. So no, I wouldn’t consider doing a semi-naked photo shoot for many reasons stated here: I wouldn’t want the pics to fall into the wrong hands and am normally a very private person. But that doesn’t mean I’m a prude by any means.

Lori

February 10th, 2012
10:02 am

@Jarvis…that’s kinda funny, because I think women are the opposite. I find it very sexy that my husband is a fantastic father. And I really get turned on when he helps out with the household chores. LOL

homeschooler

February 10th, 2012
10:02 am

“If you can’t do something hot & sexy for your husband (doesn’t have to be just photos, could be something else nice), just remember that there are a lot of women out there who won’t be so prudish.”

I say “Hell no”! And to the nameless person who commented the above. If I was 110lbs and 5′7″ I might consider it but at age 40 5′1″ and 25lbs overweight, this would not be the way I choose to do something sexy for my husband. He’d probably say, uhh..thanks hon but I like you better in those tight jeans and low cut blouse. Some things are just better seen covered up or in dim lighting. You don’t have to be a prude to say no to this..just realistic.

Besides, my husband and I have been celebrating Valentines day together for 25 yrs. We agree it is a cheesy kids holiday. I might get some obligatory flowers but we save our romance for anniversaries (and anytime we happen to get the kids out of the house)

Augusta

February 10th, 2012
10:12 am

My husband does not give me flowers on Valentine’s day, at my request. Instead, he buys something we can plant in the yard. I have so many beautiful trees, that came to me as saplings, and so many other plants, and we have landscapped our yard with all the beautiful plants and trees he has given me over the years. We have lived in the same house for over 15 years.

I would much rather have something I can enjoy looking at every day, for years to come, instead of some flowers that will die next week. Now that doesn’t mean he NEVER gets me flowers. When he does, it’s for NO reason at all. Sometimes he’ll be in store and see a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and he will get them for me, just because.

K's Mom

February 10th, 2012
10:18 am

@A, very well said!

Lori

February 10th, 2012
10:24 am

I’m with you Augusta on the flowers. I hate cut flowers. They just die in a week and leave me with a mess in the kitchen under the vase. I’d rather have a rose bush planted, or even better a nice gardenia that I don’t have to prune!

shaggy

February 10th, 2012
10:53 am

No need here…I get that “upon demand” and live beats memorex any day or night.

jarvis

February 10th, 2012
10:55 am

@Lori, I know. I know what my wife appreciates. Shortly after we marrierd, the first time she saw me scrub a bathtub, she said something about it “making her hot”.

I thought she was kidding. She was not.

It’s all about the wiring.

Jeff

February 10th, 2012
11:20 am

I haven’t participated in valentines day in 15 years. Do I need to do a great thing for you one day a year, or would you rather me do all those things ALL year?

Soccer MILF

February 10th, 2012
11:29 am

My husband only appreciates me posing like I am auditioning for OUI magazine. The guy is a degenerate when it comes to pictures, Seems like the only pictures he finds sexy invovles girls who are barely legal and revealing everythign they have yt still wearing a catholic girl skirt.

Lori

February 10th, 2012
11:38 am

I think sometimes the key is just to do something out of the ordinary, not necessarily something that is conventionally “sexy” or “romantic”. My husband will get all lovey-dovey if I just do something spontaneous, even if it’s something simple like wanting to go take a hike through a park (since I never want to do outdoorsy stuff). I think he just enjoys the difference in the daily routine and that in itself can change “the mood”.

Cayce C

February 10th, 2012
11:40 am

@Denise, I can definitely do a much more tame shoot if you’re looking to celebrate your nearly 40 year old self. Just google my first name with boudoir and you’ll find my contact info. I shoot regular portraits as well as weddings and boudoir.

@Lori & @ Jeff – I also believe we’re wired differently. And men are very visual (Dudeoir exists but it’s not that popular among straight couples). A lot of my clients say their husbands are thrilled they agreed to do something just for them that is often out of character. And it’s particularly popular with the wives and girlfriends of servicemen. Some display their photos in their bedrooms, many don’t. Some carry small books with their wive’s photos with them on business trips. It’s a little secret between the two of them.

Me

February 10th, 2012
11:43 am

How many on this blog will openly admit to being pure prudes?? Geez — Seems the majority of those posting are not just conservative but well beyond! :)
I fully agree “to each their own” but, really, have a little fun in life and loosen up some.
Why not allow the husband to take his own pictures of you? Or you of him? My iPhone has plenty of pics of “us” – protected and encrypted by an app designed for such – and no digital negatives to worry about. Or, take some shots of yourself.
Life is simply too short to not explore, expand, and have a little fun.

Augusta

February 10th, 2012
11:54 am

There was a lady at the grocery store the other day. She was commenting on what she EXPECTED to receive from her husband on VD. He better get me this, he better do that for me, etc. I asked her, What are you doing for him? She looked at me like I had two heads, and replied, with a straight face – “Nothing”. She said VD was all about the man making the woman happy and she never did anything for him on VD. Not even a card….Sad…..very sad.

Soccer MILF

February 10th, 2012
11:54 am

Shock your husband and do a photo shoot straight out of the pages of Hustler!

Me

February 10th, 2012
11:57 am

Or, even better, agree to the threesome or foursome!

Augusta

February 10th, 2012
12:12 pm

Let your husband BE the photographer…..

Penguinmom

February 10th, 2012
12:35 pm

I’m thankful I have ad-block so I don’t ever see ads on FB. I believe you can click check an ad as ‘not interested’ or something and it might not show up again. (At least you used to be able to, I don’t get ads anymore so that might have changed).

GoldieLocks

February 10th, 2012
12:37 pm

I absolutely would do boudoir pictures. Matter of fact, I saw Cayce’s website a few days ago. The photos were very nice and tasteful. I’ve been looking for a boudoir photographer.

I would share the boudior photos with my husband and family….even my mom. I would not want to have photos taken that looked like they should belong in a ‘adult’ magazine.

Fred

February 10th, 2012
12:50 pm

I just looked at Cayce’s site. All i can say is WOW.

You do excellent work Cacye. Very tasteful and elegant. I looked at both your galleries, the wedding and the boudoir. You truly have the artist’s eye. I book marked your site. I want to have some shot’s of my wife and daughter (not boudoir you perv’s reading this lol) and I can see you would not only do anexcellent job but have some ideas of a perfect setting.

Augusta

February 10th, 2012
12:54 pm

@cayce – I just went to your website. Those boudoir pictures are beautiful!!!! Very sexy and sensual. Thank you for sharing your website….

Done this,

February 10th, 2012
12:58 pm

I did this for my guy for Christmas. It was a great experience! The place I went was all women, so it was easy to feel comfortable. I had my make-up done and felt beautiful. The process was very comfortable – you bring your own clothes so you can wear as much or as little as you want – no nudity! And they edited the pictures so they look amazing.
I will say that my boyfriend loved them, but now they are stuck away in a drawer so that my daughter doesn’t find them.

whocaresssss

February 10th, 2012
1:59 pm

Get off facebook and raise your kids!

Mark

February 10th, 2012
2:30 pm

I want to add one thing, because it’s been mentioned twice…” Pro photgraphy lighting and equipment will show many of your imperfections so retouching should be done.” Lighting and posing done right will diminish flaws and imperfections, with minimal retouching needed.

Many women do this because they want to feel beautiful. We make women feel beautiful, especially after they are not “young and skinny” anymore. We also do this for some of our brides to present to their grooms on the wedding night.

K's Mom

February 10th, 2012
2:40 pm

@Augusta, it is women like that that give the rest of us a bad name…my husband’s ex quizzed him every VDay, Bday. Anniversary and Christmas on how long he shopped for her gift, how much he spent, how much he spent to get it wrapped and if he had called any of her friends to make sure she would like it. I noticed that my first b-day that we were together that he was a nervous wreck. When I was genuinely excited over my gift he told me how stressed he was about whether or not I would like it and if he would be in the dog house.

I try to do out of the ordinary thoughtful things throughout the year for the hubs and he does the same. I am going to cook the same meal I made for our Second date on Tuesday night and I got him one of his favorite movies on DVD.

Kat

February 10th, 2012
2:53 pm

@Lori: Thanks for that information – my hubby LOVES Carraba’s too!

For gifts, you really have to think of the other person. He says he thinks I’m sexy all the time. I’m sure one day I will believe it, but he might not think so by that point!

Cayce C

February 10th, 2012
3:41 pm

Thanks everyone! I love what I do and look forward to working with all of you when you call!

@Mark – I’m one of the best in town at lighting and posing and I still retouch and smooth skin, simply because these kinds of images have the potential to make women feel fantastic or make them feel really bad about themselves. I don’t digitally make people look thinner or way younger or anything like that, I just make sure their skin has a great smooth glow. We live in a world where all of the non-news photos we see have been radically retouched – far beyond what I do. I think it’s only fair to level the playing field when women want to look a bit glamorous.

☺☻Have A Smile!

February 10th, 2012
3:58 pm

Figment

February 10th, 2012
4:17 pm

No thanks. Not something I care to do. I’d rather have a nice evening at home with my family. I don’t need gifts for V day. My man and I are going to have lunch together for V Day. And I got him a card too.

poll

February 10th, 2012
4:33 pm

How many have made a private video? Do those ever actually stay private?

JATL

February 10th, 2012
5:39 pm

I’ve thought about doing this. My husband would love to see me gussied up like this LIVE, and he would enjoy seeing photos, but then what? I mean -we see each other almost every single day. Neither of us travels for work, so the only time we’re away from each other for any length of time is when one of us goes away with friends or something. I seriously don’t see him pulling them out and pleasuring himself to them or anything! So, I don’t know. I kind of think it would be a waste of money. I had rather just go buy the sexy outfit and wear it for him -in the flesh!

Kat

February 10th, 2012
9:01 pm

@Me: You think my husband wants a threesome or foursome and that I should just do it? Well, okay, but I think those other guys will make his camera work a little shaky.

Sharon

February 10th, 2012
9:01 pm

Yes, definitely!! I am turning forty this year and totally doing a session for myself. My hubby will enjoy it but honestly it is more for myself than for him. This should be on every woman:s bu ket list.

catlady

February 11th, 2012
2:22 pm

Lori and Jarvis: To me the absolutely sexiest thing a man can do is wash dishes without being asked. Unfortunately my former husband never learned this. Second is watching a man shaving in his boxers. Whew!

As to the photos, no, I am not at a point yet where this sounds like a good idea. Maybe when I turn 60 this summer….LOL

Denise

February 11th, 2012
4:32 pm

Cayce – your pictures are GREAT!!!!! WOW! I would DEFINITELY take pictures like THOSE even though I don’t have anybody to share them with. :-)

Big Poppa Pump

February 12th, 2012
11:08 am

Ladies,

Please let me say that sexy photos of yourself, boudoir, naked, semi-naked, lingerie, swimwear, whatever, are and will always be appreciated by your man.

They are ALWAYS the right size, the right color and the right shape.

Men are VISUALLY-stimulated creatures, and nothing gets Mr. Wobbly Finger to stand at attention like our lady being all sexy just for us.

Gimme.

Big Poppa Pump

February 12th, 2012
11:09 am

catlady,

what about those men who shave naked after we get out of the shower?

shaving in your boxers just invites water to run down your chest and get your boxers wet.

Big Poppa Pump

February 12th, 2012
11:19 am

Frankly, I have in-law who says he wouldn’t mind some photos of Paula Deen wearing nothing but an apron in the kitchen.

He says that gal can cook AND be sexy (& Southern) at the same time.

I suppose the only thing that stirs a man’s primal urges as much as sex is food.
When you combine the two…..

Whoo, Boy!

Big Poppa Pump

February 12th, 2012
11:27 am

Cayce,

Your web site is absolutely STUNNING.

I cannot help but envy each and every guy to whom the lady in each beautiful photo is committed. How Lucky!

(Mr. Wobbly Finger says he also approves of your work.)

Seriously, you are a credit to your profession, Cayce.
Bravo!

sal

February 12th, 2012
6:40 pm

I am one HOT 47 year old (according to my hubby!) and I would definitely consider doing some classy but sensual boudoir pics for him. Got him the best Christmas gift this year when I had some pics taken of me and also of me and my daughter, wearing some stunning, very flattering evening gowns. Of course, he also loves the fully clothed close up pictures of my ta ta’s that I text to him once in awhile… ;-) Valentines day EVERY day in my house!

Not Convinced

February 12th, 2012
8:53 pm

@Jarvis…removing blemishes, scars, and digital noise from pictures are warranted to enhance the appreciation of the body. Many people have blemishes or scars that may have occurred in life but doesn’t affect their human form (body). Photography produces a certain amount of noise that is pronounce in digital format which may require some retouching.

Typical Guy

February 13th, 2012
12:01 pm

Baby,

If you truly loved me, you would get me some photos of you for Valentine’s Day.

Love,

Bubba Beefcake

  

February 13th, 2012
12:59 pm

No thanks. Not something I care to do. I’d rather have a nice evening at home with my family. I don’t need gifts for V day. My man and I are going to have lunch together for V Day. And I got him a card too.

Yeah, don’t worry about it. He’ll meet someone off of Craigslist who’s willing to do what you won’t. Not a problem. ;)