The etiquette of graduation invitations: Please advise!

I have gotten a note from one of our regulars with a bunch of graduation invitation conundrums:

  1. Do you send invitations to all the neighbors on the block? Just ones you are friends with? Our regular was hurt that a neighbor they are good friends with didn’t send her an invitation. She doesn’t believe it was intended as a slight just that the teen wasn’t responsible enough to get them out in time.
  2. Do you send invitations to old college roommates or people your kids have never met? The same regular got an invitation from her college roommate’s daughter whom she had never met and she thought that was odd. Do you send a gift to that person? Do you just send a card?
  3. Do you send invitations to old friends that live literally thousands of miles away?
  4. Who actually writes and send the invitations? It is good old Mom or does the graduating teen have to do it? (I totally think the teen!!)
  5. How far in advance should they be sent?
  6. What about the thank yous?

I am always more than happy NOT to get graduation invitations. I think for the most part they are just requests for money. I can think on one graduation invitation that moved me. It was for a little guy I babysat. I went to his graduation party and his mother introduced me around as his babysitter. I was very proud of him.

Are grad invites just a request for presents or meaningful? Do you want them or are you just as happy not to get one? Do you want them from kids of old roommates that live thousands of miles away or just close by family members and friends?

– Theresa Walsh Giarrusso, ajc.com Momania. I have increased my Twitter activity. I am sending out great stories for moms each day focusing on health, fitness, sex, entertainment, food, travel and obviously parenting! So follow me on Twitter at @AJCMOMania!)

67 comments Add your comment

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
1:25 pm

To quote Seinfeld, these are “Unvitations”. They aren’t inviting you anywhere. There’s not even a place to RSVP.
They might as well send you a donation card.

In order (and I have been there)...

May 24th, 2011
1:27 pm

1 – only good friends – not everyone on the block as it appears to be just a “request” for gifts

2 – Only if you are still good friends with college roommates and will respond accordingly for their kids – responses are whatever you feel is appropriate

3 – No

4 – Does not really matter

5 – One month

6 – ALWAYS from the kid who is graduating

And, I am with T, as I am ALWAYS happy to NOT get these requests for gifts – everyone knows your kid will eventually graduate, no one needs to remind them…

JJ

May 24th, 2011
1:32 pm

At my daughter’s high school, they sent out graduation announcements. You could order as many announcements as you wanted.

However, the actual graduation ceremony, each grad was given 10 tickets to hand out. If that wasn’t enough, you had to find someone who wasn’t using all their tickets. Our tickets went to family.

If you receive an announcement, the proper etiquette is to send the graduate money. Not to attend the ceremony.

JJ

May 24th, 2011
1:33 pm

Answer to question #4 – THE GRADUATE. And the graduate should also pen the thank you notes. Not mommy……

RJ

May 24th, 2011
1:34 pm

Give them to the people that you feel would actually care. As I will be dealing with this next year, I can assure you that I won’t be giving my neighbors an invitation; we’re not that close. Close friends and family. That’s it.

I dealt with this with my wedding. My husband and I chose to have a small wedding with less than 100 guests. I never grew up dreaming of some Cinderella wedding, so I just wanted to share the moment with my closet friends and family. I was amazed when people told us that they were disappointed that they didn’t get an invitation. My former hairstylist went so far to say that she would’ve given me $100! I was left speechless. I have no regrets on how I did it, cause like the song, I did it my way!!!

Sko

May 24th, 2011
1:36 pm

First, they are not invitations. They are announcements. They are letting you know the person is graduating. Sure, they may send it hoping for gifts – you are not obligated to send a gift just because you receive one. So far, I’ve received five this year – one from a niece, one from a nephew, and three from friends. All five have included a photo of the grad, and an invitation to their party. I was very happy to get them. I may or may not get them gifts depending on which ones we’re talking about. So, the short answer is – send them to people who would be interested to know your child is graduating. If you don’t want it to be viewed as a request for gifts, put a small note in – just wanted you to know, no gifts necessary, etc. If you don’t want to open what you view as a request for a gift – just throw it away. Or, take a look, say a small prayer for the graduate, and go on your happy way. Cards are nice if it’s a close friend’s child, but not required. You give a gift because you want to give one, and that should be the only reason. Nobody will hunt you down if you don’t respond – they are way too busy at this time of year to worry about what you did or didn’t do….

Peanut Scab

May 24th, 2011
1:37 pm

This use of “please advise” is a habit. It’s like my leaving the kitchen drawers open–not a terrible, serious problem. But it does get in the way of a clear, efficient message.

One of the problems with “Please advise” is that advise is a transitive verb, that is, it must have an object. Someone must be advised. For example, I can write, “The doctor advised me about taking supplements” or “I advised him to eliminate the angry tone in his writing.”

Some usage experts accept advise in place of inform or tell. Others use advise only in situations that involve advice (as in the doctor’s advice on supplements and my advice on eliminating the angry tone). I prefer that limited use.

If using “Please advise” is a standard practice in your industry, then improve upon it. For example, “Please advise of shipping status” may seem perfect in your office, but it reads like an old telegram, in which each word cost money. These days, with no additional cost you can add us or me and have a clear, complete sentence: “Please advise us of the shipping status.”

It’s time to break those old, unconscious habits. Since my elderly relative “advised” me of my habit, I see those open drawers, and I close them. Look for your “Please advise” or other habitual expressions, and get rid of them.

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
1:48 pm

Thanks Peanut Scab, I’ll be sure to finish reading that comment the next time I’m having trouble sleeping.

Peanut Scab

May 24th, 2011
1:48 pm

Just as I guess. You just don’t care abut improving your communication skills.

lwa

May 24th, 2011
1:52 pm

My daughter is graduating this week so here we go….

1. No, we didn’t send ANNOUNCEMENTS

JJ

May 24th, 2011
1:54 pm

@jarvis – ROTFLMAO…..

lwa

May 24th, 2011
1:55 pm

My daughter graduates this year.

1. No, we didn’t send any ANNOUNCEMENTS

lwa

May 24th, 2011
1:56 pm

I hit the submit button early…

1. No, we didnt’ send any ANNOUNCEMENTS to the neighbors. I sent an evite to the cook out to a few.

2. No, we didn’t send any announcements to anyone my child has not met.

3. Yes, we sent a few announcements to friends who live far away now because they know my daughter and we lived in the area before.

4. The announcements are written by the school. My daughter typed the addresses for the labels.

5. We send the announcements about 1 month to 3 weeks in advance and included a picture.

6. Yes, thank you’s will be written by the teen.

The cook out invitations were sent to a larger group of people. We don’t want or expect a gift. Just come out and celebrate this milestone.

Hindu Elvis Pimp

May 24th, 2011
1:56 pm

Jarvis? Are you always this unhappy?

iRun

May 24th, 2011
2:00 pm

Chuck Steel Atty @ Law

May 24th, 2011
2:06 pm

I bought my daughter a Porsche(we are inane, so we pronounce it porsh) for her graduation. Larry, in my firm bought his son a Mercedes, so I had to go with the Porsche.

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
2:12 pm

Not to answer a question with a question, but….Are you always that poor at reading people? I have been called MANY things in my life, but unhappy isn’t one of them.

If you find pleasure in a quarter of a page diatribe about the proper use of “advise” by all means have at it. Me, I’d rather make fun of it.

Buzz Momma

May 24th, 2011
2:16 pm

(1) Only to neighbors we know really well or had some impact in the graduates’ life.

(2) What do my friends have to do with the graduate? Nope – only to people that had some impact on the graduate – but extended family are open to receive them. I have received tons of graduation invites from cousins, distant cousins, etc. I sent them a present, they can do the same for my child. It’s a celebration that they made it… but sometimes, also a request for some “help” as they make their way into the real world.
(3) Do you send invitations to old friends that live literally thousands of miles away? YEP – if they are true friends who are still in contact and you believe would appreciate an invite.
(4) The teen or college graduate is writing the invitation. Mom and Dad should have NOTHING to do with it – except track down an address or two if the teen is having trouble. My highschool teacher went over invitation etiquette with us – and was firm in saying the ALL addresses had to be hand written, correctly punctuated, and properly addressed by the graduate.
(5) A month would be nice – especially if people ARE planning to travel to attend the graduation. However, two weeks would suffice if it’s a neighbor.
(6) Again, I’m old school on this. Just reference Emily Post – and that “Thank You” note better be in the graduate’s handwriting!!!! Mom and Dad have nothing to do with it – other than reminding the graduate that it needs to be done in a timely manner!!

iRun

May 24th, 2011
2:18 pm

Now now Jarvis. I’ve seen you get trite with several around here.

RSC

May 24th, 2011
2:18 pm

I’m not sure I follow why you chose to give this lesson on a blog about graduation invitations. Please advise.

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
2:27 pm

I try not to ramble, but I’ve got so much good stuff to say.

usually lurking

May 24th, 2011
2:36 pm

@RJ – funny about the wedding. I got grief from a woman at the gym whose last name I did not even know because I did not invite her to my wedding.
Anyway, I was honored and thrilled yesterday to get an invitation to the grad party for the child of good friends who moved away some years ago. We’d actually go if we could…

LM

May 24th, 2011
2:43 pm

We sent out announcements to friends and family a week prior to my daughter’s graduation last year. The few people who we invited to the graduation were informed by me several weeks earlier. I did not want to send announcements too early, giving the impression we were looking for gifts and attendance to the graduation. I ordered the invitations from the local Haulmark store since I was not impressed with the school invitation considering how much they cost.

The week following her graduation, she sent out thank you cards to the family and friends who atteneded and to the everyone who sent a card. Her most treasuered gift from graudation was a heartfelt card from her kindergarden teacher.

Kat

May 24th, 2011
3:00 pm

I think teachers would treasure receiving an announcement that includes the graduate’s current and “previous” (elementary) picture (with year taught) with it. I’m not a teacher, but I think that would be very sweet.

One unusually long and gross hair growing from my chin

May 24th, 2011
3:26 pm

My daughter is skipping her graduation. She graduated early and started college at Agnes Scott. She has no interest in some outdated tribal ceremony.

In order (and I have been there)...

May 24th, 2011
3:34 pm

Enter your comments here

catlady

May 24th, 2011
3:38 pm

IF you have enough invites available, and IF your child is the valedictorian or salutatorian, THEN invite close friends. IF no to either, then send announcements to those with a close connection to the child. Nothing says “tacky” like invitations or announcements to those who don’t know your child. If you are writing a letter (remember those) or email to a friend of yours, it’s okay to mention it in passing.

As a former kindergarten teacher, I am thrilled to get announcements from former students.

Obviously, hairy chin...

May 24th, 2011
3:40 pm

…your daughter has no friends, and for that I am truly distressed, even if she is not…forget tribal customs, the ceremony is a rite of passage, and your daughter missed out on having friends with whom to share the joy and angst, just as some of closest friends’ kids chose to do, too…

One unusually long and gross hair growing from my chin

May 24th, 2011
3:43 pm

You’re right, she had not friends because she is physically challenged. She was often the butt of many jokes. The school does not deserve her appearance at a “rite of passage”

BTW, she is fitting nicely in to Agnes Scott.

Stacey

May 24th, 2011
3:45 pm

I received graduation invitations for my next door neighbor’s (now adult) son’s when the graduated from high school. The boys cut my grass when they were teens and I was friends with their mother so I didn’t think it was strange to be invited but would not have been offended if I wasn’t. Since their graduations were held outdoors at the high school football stadium, I could have attended but was out of town for graduations of family members and missed both. I gave them both a card and money.

I received an invitation for my niece’s out of state graduation the day before the ceremony. I would not have been able to attend due to a scheduling conflict but I do wish I had gotten it soon enough to send her a gift before the graduation. My husband’s niece is graduating Friday but they only received 5 tickets per graduate and she has two parent, two siblings and three grandparents who all live in the metro Atlanta area and want to attend. I think they decided that the parents and grandparents will attend and the rest of us will attend her party Saturday.

Janice

May 24th, 2011
3:46 pm

i sent a gift to one last year, former step-son. i’m still waiting acknowledgement of gift or thank you.

just annoys me how people don’t take time to write thank you notes. my birthday was sat, i’ve sent out my thank you notes already.

TnT's Mom

May 24th, 2011
3:48 pm

As the parent of a senior – made him address the “ANNOUNCEMENTS” and only to those people he wanted to send. Mainly family and very close family friends. He sent a few to his church camp friends and counselor and to his former youth minister. He did not send to our neighbors, as we see them often and they already know he is graduating. They have seniors graduating as well. We are close with 2 of these neighbors and I am giving a gift card and small gift to the graduate even though I did not get an announcment.

As others have said…. its an announcement that the person is graduating and not an invite or solitation for a gift. If the receipient wants to send a gift, great, if not, no biggie. Yes, for some graduating high school is an accomplishment.

sue

May 24th, 2011
3:49 pm

My son is graduating from high school this week. When the subject of announcements came up, his response was, “Everyone that knows me at all knows that I am graduating. Why spend the money?”

My son is very wise….and frugal.

Sylvania

May 24th, 2011
3:50 pm

As per Emily Post, people who receive an invitation to the ceremony or party should send or bring a gift. People who receive announcements are not obligated to send a gift, but should send an congratulatory card or note.

@Jarvis – “…but I’ve got so much good stuff to say.” Next time, drop the “got” and simply write “…but I have so much to good stuff to say.” Then you’ll sound like you made it past 4th grade grammar.

Peanut Scab

May 24th, 2011
3:53 pm

Now jarvis will want to fight you.

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
3:58 pm

Wow. Zing. If only you hadn’t made the type-o. Keep trying though.

Denise

May 24th, 2011
4:01 pm

This weekend I am going to my 20-year high school class reunion and I am so excited about it. I am having a few of the “normal” reunion worries like “I’ve put on a few pounds” (some GREAT pounds and about 10 that I should have gotten off before now but I didn’t work off) and that my skin is worse than it was when I was in high school but in general I’m excited to see the folks who walked across the stage with me 20 years ago, May 23, 1991 at the Baton Rouge Centroplex.

I get excited when I receive graduation announcements. They mark an end to one stage in life and the beginning of another. I usually only get them from family. None of my friends have kids old enough to graduate from high school yet. I got one from my neighbor who graduated from UGA 2 weeks ago and I got misty-eyed thinking about how young he was when his daddy all but dragged him by the scruff of his neck to ask me if he could cut my grass when he was about 11. I basically watched him grow from a boy to a man and he included me in the number of folks he wanted to know he was moving on to another phase of his life. That was special for me. Yes, I am writing him a check. I write checks to everyone who sends me an announcement. $50 for family that I’m close to; $25 for folks who probably didn’t care to send it to me but their parent reminded them to. It’s just a few bucks to honor an achievement but I like to do just that – honor an achievement. BUT…no announcement, no money. If you don’t think to include me in your celebration I’m not going to chase you down to give you my money.

Good Grief

May 24th, 2011
4:15 pm

I apologize, Sylvania, if the following statement appears as a rock projected directly from the window of my glass house, but I would suggest that before commenting on on the grammatical shortcomings of others’ posts, you proofread your own.

motherjanegoose

May 24th, 2011
4:25 pm

@ Denise…can you adopt my two…LOL. My daughter’s birthday is Friday and she got a CARD…that’s all folks…from her Grandpa. Some may remember the one book we got for our Family Christmas Gift….to share. Brother in law had a chat with Grandpa and he then sent $100 for our family and theirs too. We gave the $$ to the kids. I am going to tell my Dad that her other Grandpa must have forgotten and sent her 2 cards EACH with $20 in them. TRUE.

We sent announcements along with an invitation to the sit down dinner to a select group of folks who are either related or quite close to our family. Sent out a month in advance. Not everyone on the block got one. We invited our son’s 3rd grade teacher, at his request. She was the guest of honor! I had each of my children introduce each person to the entire group. They did a nice job and I was proud of them!

Four neighbors on our block have HS kids that are graduating and we are not invited, in any way, to celebrate. No biggy as we have never been in their house or even their back yards, with the exception of one who showed us a remodel. I give them each a $5 ice cream card…just to let them know I am thinking of them.

MY KIDS were in charge of all of the addressing and mailing…their celebration and their job.

Thank you notes are a BIGGY for me. I just spoke with a client/friend today who has two that are out of college. She mentioned manners and I told her how some folks think there is no need for written thank you notes. She could not believe it. I think a handwritten thank you note says that you have class. I was in Kinder today and the teacher had the children writing thank you notes to staff members in the building. Good for her.

RSC….graduation ceremonies are in the next 2 weeks in the Atlanta area and most Mommas will experience this once or twice in their lives…Dads too! Here’s hoping that mine finish Pharmacy School and UGA….we will have a BIG hoopla when they are both out!

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
4:34 pm

Peanut Scab, in all honesty let me apologize. My intent was to be humorous, and obviously I was not funny to you. I’m sorry.

Denise

May 24th, 2011
4:34 pm

MJG, give me a shout when they finish! :-) I’ll be happy to celebrate with you all.

motherjanegoose

May 24th, 2011
4:49 pm

@Chuck Steele…last week my daughter comes home from church and tells us that they were discussing the best gift they ever received. Several peers mentioned cars from their parents.
She is making payments on hers and said she was not sure what to say. I reminded her of her little schnauzer, who adores her and that she raised from a puppy. All was well!

JOD

May 24th, 2011
4:51 pm

IMHO high school graduation is for immediate family only and any announcements should be from the graduate. College graduations can be more open, but again, should be from the graduate. Both of my graduations were very large and limited space-wise, so only a few could actually attend (college grad was a small party afterward). And yes, my Mama made me send the announcements both times. They were followed up with Thank You notes for any cards or gifts.

Sending announcements to people you once knew or barely know tells them that you are seeking gifts and/or showing off. Same thing for wedding invitations…

Peanut Scab

May 24th, 2011
4:54 pm

@ jarvis…

So was I!

You know, I’m going fishing later on….Care to join me?

motherjanegoose

May 24th, 2011
4:55 pm

Denise..o.k. We will breakout the Caramel Corn, instead of Popcorn…:p

Chuck Steel Atty @ Law

May 24th, 2011
4:59 pm

motherjanegoose,

Maybe if you were a better parent, you could have bought her a new car.

jarvis

May 24th, 2011
5:03 pm

Well very good. Glad we could bury the hatchet.

On another topic, ironically the mother or party etiquette, Emily Pos,t was not invited to many parties as she was seen as a no-fun tight-ass.

motherjanegoose

May 24th, 2011
5:20 pm

@ chuck…you could be right but I have been hired and flown out to speak and share parenting tips, so I might know 1 or 2 things. My two will have full knowledge of what it means to have a car payment, as they made one of $100 per month for four years on their own and saved $1000 for the down payment.

catlady

May 24th, 2011
5:46 pm

I am a stickler about thank you notes, too. My kids were required to write (or when they were little, dictate) the thank you note before playing with or using the gift (except for the first few hours of Christmas morning). It sure helped getting those notes written and addressed and stamped.

catlady

May 24th, 2011
5:49 pm

Chuck, MJG didn’t say she COULDN’T buy them cars!

cynthiam

May 24th, 2011
10:19 pm

I am so amazed that anyone would buy a high school grad a Porsche that I can hardly respond to any of the other comments!

djm_NC

May 25th, 2011
5:56 am

i thought jarvis’ reply was great lol

the teen should do all of the addressing and thank-yous…duh! only people who care should get an invitation. when my daughter graduated i had her send them to distant relatives we hadnt seen in a while because people in my family are like that-whether they can go or not they always want an invitation-they want to know what is going on…so we do that even not expecting a gift or visit. its nice for the grad to get money as a gift-but we sent invites to people that we knew cared to know that it was happening-not to get gifts.we were pleasantly surprised at a few of her dads family that came. that really made her feel good as she and her dad havent had much contact in years. as for neighbors-where i live it is such a small and tight community-almost everyone here goes to the ceremony because we always know someone who is graduating. we sent invitations to people here who are very close friends-just mainly for the momento. the graduation package we had gives a time line for everything-including at what point in time to send the invitations, so all the ‘when do i do this’ was pretty much taken care of.

motherjanegoose

May 25th, 2011
7:03 am

@cynthia…I am thinking it is a joke, about the car BUT I do know someone who bought their 16 year old a Lexus ( when she got her license). Lives here in Atlanta!

JJ

May 25th, 2011
8:02 am

I want to go fishing!!!!!! I grew up trout fishing in the Rocky Mountains!!!

JJ

May 25th, 2011
8:04 am

I can even bait my own hook!!

DB

May 25th, 2011
9:47 am

JOD: Most of our high school graduation announcements went to family and close, close friends, those who actually knew our kids and would be happy to know the details of their graduation. I tended to address the invitations, because I’ve got the nicest handwriting — plus, I do calligraphy, and I just enjoy it. But thank you notes are DEFINITELY on the kids!

Having just done the college graduation, we sent those to close family only, for fear of appearing money-grubbing. My son’s announcement had his name in it, along with the degrees and majors he was being awarded — it was a little simpler than the high school invitation, but had a nice embossed card, etc. Nice not to have that little “calling card”! At this point, I HOPE he’s written the thank you notes — but as I told him, if he doesn’t know to write a thank you note at this point, it’s all on him!

trickyhacienda8

May 25th, 2011
7:46 pm

I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by FedEX. I will never again pay expensive retail prices at stores. I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff, http://BidsWork.com

Martha White

May 25th, 2011
8:39 pm

Actually, there is no need to send announcements weeks before any event to which the recipient is not invited to attend. It is perfectly correct to mail an announcement afterward, just as with wedding announcements. Only invitations need to be mailed in advance.

aon

May 25th, 2011
9:48 pm

I HATE getting graduation announcements. They are sent specifically for money or gifts (call it what you want, but we all feel guilty if we ignore the invitation). They are usually from family or distant friends. When my son graduated, if I did not send the family/friend a gift I did not send them my son’s announcement. If I sent a gift and they never sent a thank you (I drove the daylights out of my son but he hand wrote every one one of his thank you notes.)they are permantely deleted from my gift list. With Facebook and email there is absolutely no excuse for not at least acknowledging the gift. I sent my nephew a graduation gift, a wedding gift and a baby gift. Not one thank you. On top of that, I sent him a graudation announcement for my son and he did not send a gift. The worst part, my nephew has an MBA and he is married to a beautiful, educated woman. Go figure!

sldkfjslk

May 25th, 2011
10:02 pm

Who gives a crap that your brat graduated high school. Teachers are pressured into passing everyone these days. It’s no big deal. Go do something with your life and stop acting like you’ve accomplished anything.

downsouth

May 26th, 2011
8:09 am

Let’s see, isn’t this blog about a month or two late to really have any impact… tweet tweet

motherjanegoose

May 26th, 2011
8:54 am

Aon, I sent my step brother a Graduation Gift ( from college) and a wedding gift. Nothing.
His Mom married my Dad about 15 years ago, when he was in his early twenties. We do not even get a Christmas card from him and his wife. I do not know their address now, so I could not send anything when my own two graduated. Go figure.

Jess

May 26th, 2011
10:41 am

Oh my Oh my! What to do, whatever should I do???
I open the announcement (its an announcement by the way, not an invitation),say to myself, wow, good for them and that is the end of the story. If someone is close to me, then I already know what is going on and I buy a gift…or i don’t.

been there

May 26th, 2011
3:47 pm

I remember having to decide this when I graduated (back in the dark ages). I made a list of about 20 people, close relatives and friends. My mom said “Oh, no” and I had to order almost 100 announcements. She included all kinds of relatives saying it was payback time for all the gifts she’d sent out over the years. I did address all the announcements by hand (pre computer printing!) and wrote out all the thank you notes also. I did get many good things for college and much needed cash to set things up in the dorm. I’m sure things have changed a bit but I’m sure the hand written thank-you note is still a MUST. Even if the gift was cash I had to write a special note how it was used for the college fund. I still have some of the congratulation cards 30 years later. I didn’t get a car for graduation either; bought my first car with my first salary after college which I’m sure is unheard of now.

Boner Scab

May 26th, 2011
5:14 pm

So I was blowing a load on Snookies face the other day and I thought to myself, I need more chicks in my life.

newblogger

May 27th, 2011
7:24 pm

O.k., I know, writing thank you notes is proper and expected. But, if the only reason you are giving a gift is to be recognized and thanked for it, then you shouldn’t give a gift to begin with. I’m sure I have given gifts and not gotten a thank you note afterward. I couldn’t begin to tell you who they are and I really don’t care. I gave the gift because I wanted to and I’m sure they appreciated it whether they said so or not. Was it rude to not write a thank you note? Probably…but I didn’t give the gift to get accolades for giving a gift. I gave a gift because I cared. You don’t have to be recognized for every act of giving.

CC

May 31st, 2011
4:19 pm

I’m with Jarvis here, this is an unvitation. I received an unvitation to the graduation, (no after party) for the daughter of an ex-friend who made a point to not speak with me in over 3 years. I sent a check to her daughter but I have to admit I was bitter about it. Was going to do something for her anyway but hated the in your face begging, wish people would be more thoughtful!!