Is your teen ‘on call’ for texts all night? Are they exhausted and actually hurting learning cycle?

Boston.com has an excellent story about teens who are sleeping with their phones under their pillows or near the bed so they can wake up in case a friend needs them via text.

They are “on call” in case of a break up or other emotional teen trauma. But besides becoming exhausted from not getting enough sleep, these texting teens are actually interrupting their learning cycle!!

Here are some stats from the article on teen texting:

Teenagers sent and received an average of 3,276 texts per month in the last quarter of 2010, according to the most recent statistics from the Nielsen Co.

“A Pew Research Center study from 2010 reported that more than four out of five teens with cellphones sleep with the phone on or near the bed, sometimes falling asleep with it in their hands in the middle of a conversation. Pew researchers did not ask whether the phones were on, but Amanda Lenhart, a senior research specialist, said ‘many expressed reluctance to ever turn their phones off.’ ”

“Researchers at the JFK Medical Center sleep laboratory in Edison, N.J., found in a 2010 study that teens sent an average of 33.5 e-mails and texts overnight and that their sleep was affected. A National Sleep Foundation study released this month found that almost one in five teens ages 13-18 are awakened by a phone call, text message, or e-mail at least a few nights a week.”

Michael Rich, director of Children’s Hospital Boston’s Center on Media and Child Health, explains that it’s not just that the kids are exhausted, they are actually interfering with their learning cycle.

“Children who text late into the night do not fall asleep as well, he said, and they don’t enter the deep sleep of Stage 4 REM sleep, ‘which is crucial to moving experiences and lessons of the day from short-term into long-term memory — in other words, completing the learning process.’’”

“Anticipating texts, Rich explained, leads to a bad night’s sleep in the same way as an early morning flight or other predawn obligation. ‘You’re so focused on not screwing up your wake-up that you don’t sleep as well.’ ”

The story explains why kids text during the night:

A.      It makes them feel needed and loved that someone is texting them.

B.      It makes them feel less lonely.

C.      But they may also feel pressure to answer. Researchers found some teens were angry with their friends when they didn’t respond back immediately.

What’s interesting is that according to a  2010 Kaiser Family Foundation study found that “relatively few 7th-12th graders say their parents have established any rules about talking or texting on a cell phone.’’

Parents may not realize that letting their kids have their cell phone with them in their rooms at night can cause this many problems but the good news is I think the solution is very easy.

Parents just have to take the phones away at night. The phones stay downstairs or in the parents’ room (depending on if your kid would sneak it upstairs after you went to bed). Friends are told my family has a rule no texting after 10 and my phone is taken away for the night. (The article said it’s easier for teens to say it’s a family rule and blame their parents, than for them to say “I need my sleep! Leave me alone!”)

We had a rule in high school no calling after 10 p.m. and that was just the rule. If your friend called you were told, no calling after 10 p.m.

If the teens don’t want to comply by your cell phone rules then they don’t get the phone at all. (I’m pretty sure they’ll agree to the new nighttime rules.)

What do you think: Are you teens sleeping near or with their phones? Are they texting during the night? Are they semi-asleep on call waiting for their phone to vibrate? Are they not finishing their learning cycle, transferring their knowledge from short term to long term memory? Are they sleeping through classes or getting sick because they are so worn out by being “on call?” Are you surprised by how much damage this can cause?
– Theresa Walsh Giarrusso, ajc.com Momania

47 comments Add your comment

DB

March 29th, 2011
3:18 am

When mine were in high school, the phone was required to be turned off and on the charger in the kitchen at 8 pm in the 9th grade, 9 in the 10th grade, 10 in the 11th grade and 11 pm their senior year for school nights. Otherwise, yes, the daughter, especially, would have definitely been on it until the wee hours of the morning. The son, not so much. Their friends had similar rules, and the ones that didn’t knew that it was useless to call after 9 pm. If it was an “emergency”, they could call the land line, but that seldom happened, except in case of lost homework, etc.

I think the study is right in that kids haven’t learned to discern that they don’t HAVE to answer the phone when it rings. A few years ago, my daughter tried to explain to me that it was rude not to answer immediately, and I explained that if her friend was standing right there with us, it would be extremely rude for them to suddenly burst into the middle of a conversation or interrupt her watching TV or talking to another friend — so why was it less rude doing it on the phone? At one point, a boy she was dating called incessantly while we were enjoying browsing a craft show. She was getting increasingly frustrated, and I was getting annoyed. Finally, the phone rang yet again (probably the 10th time in an hour), and I answered the phone and politely told him that he was interrupting my personal time with my daughter, and that she would call him when we finished. End of calls. :-) I had to explain that a phone is not a leash, for other people to tug on at their whim — the phone is a tool for them to communicate with the world on THEIR terms, and if they didn’t control the phone, the phone would control them. It’s a teachable moment :-)

shaggy

March 29th, 2011
6:30 am

Simply take the device away if it’s “interfering” with their learning cycle. At least pretend to exercise some discipline. The child can text to their hearts desire once they grow up, can pay for it, and are living under someone else’s rules.
Why bow down to a child’s wants, while sacrificing what you as the parent, should know to be their needs. Why is this so hard to understand?

catlady

March 29th, 2011
8:02 am

This does happen a lot, and there is one cure: Be a PARENT.

NoWay

March 29th, 2011
8:19 am

I’m with Shaggy on this one, and as catlady says “BE a PARENT”.

the easter bunny

March 29th, 2011
8:25 am

I have a grandson and I do not know what is going on. Teenagers want their space, if that happens to be their bed with a cell phone under the pillow that is fine. I tried to get involved, however this is their primetime, and without interference. He had the lead role in “How to Succeed in Business without reALLY TRYING. A talented guy who wants to go into broadcast journalism. I just heard on CBS, women start feeling old at 29, it’s 58 for men. Why the difference? It is because women have children by then and they figure they have fulfilled their mission by propogation, funny but true.

Me

March 29th, 2011
8:28 am

Take advantage of the parental controls – you set the times of the day that the phone will receive messages – Can also be used to completely disable all communications including phone or can be tailored to allow the phone 24/7 while only allowing texts during certain hours.

Techmom

March 29th, 2011
8:28 am

We’re dealing with this somewhat now though I wouldn’t call it a major issue. Our son is a sophomore but he likes his sleep so he’s usually ok with going with the directive to put the phone away & go to bed; and more often than not, we don’t have to tell him. Luckily he doesn’t have a girlfriend just lots of friends but I think boys are ok without the instance response (more so than girls anyway). He’s been getting up early for morning workouts though and I can definitely tell he’s missing that extra sleep (he’s been coming home and taking an afternoon nap). I think sleep is important but even without the phones and texting, it seems like it’s difficult for active & involved kids to get 8 or more hours of sleep a night. I’m not big on a strict bed time once kids are older but we definitely enforce one when we know our son needs it. Like I said though, he likes his sleep so it’s not really a battle. There are a couple of girls in particular that I can think of in our youth group though that I know are usually up half the night b/c they’re posting stuff on facebook at all hours.

I hadn’t really considered that long-term memory commitment takes places during stage 4 REM…. it’s a no wonder I remember anything from college quite frankly if that’s the case.

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
8:30 am

Not something we have had a problem with here, to my knowledge.

They are both out now but when they are home I still do not see it.

We also did not have a lot of “sneaking”….including out of the house in the middle of the night. @ shaggy…I asked my daughter about this last week, after your comment. It was met with awe as we both acknowledged someone would get hurt if they tried to sneak out of their bedrooms, in the front of our house and on a hill.

Good points DB, that I have to remind myself of with my cell phone.

Anyone know anything about this? I rode the shuttle to my car from the ATL airport. The driver was new and I chatted with her. She was telling me about her grandchild, of her son. Parents are not together. Son had sole custody but Mom pleaded with the judge. Now they swap weeks with the 4 year old. Mom is on drugs. Grandma let the Mom and grandchild move in with her, so she could keep an eye on things. Mom is in and out as she pleases…sometimes gone for a week. Grandma has called DFACS but says they will not do anything since the grandson is living with her and has a stable adult in his life…HUH? Territory I know nothing about. Should she contact the judge?

Scary stuff going on out in our world…I feel sorry for the children.

Techmom

March 29th, 2011
8:32 am

*instant response

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
8:34 am

I do not take phone calls after 9;00. My husband will screen them and if it is critical, he calls me.
When I talk on the phone for 30 minutes or so, I CANNOT fall asleep. I want to be asleep by 10:00!

Techmom

March 29th, 2011
8:34 am

@Me it’s too bad that parental controls have to be paid for on most carriers (it’s $4.99 extra per month). Not that most parents would even know how to set the limits though.

Betty

March 29th, 2011
8:51 am

TWG–you mentioned the rule “no calls after 10:00 growing up” and we had a similar rule but it seemed back then (this would have been the 70’s before we all had cell phones) that it was as much a matter of respect. In our home, I think it would have been considered rude to call after 9 pm–and that included friends of my parents too. The phone would wake up anyone in the house that had gone to sleep–and that included my Dad. We also had the rule that you let the phone ring during dinner time and didn’t answer it if we were eating–(unless we were waiting on an important call) and we didn’t have answering service either!

It’s funny how I feel that I’m in the minority (including both teens and adults) that when I’m visiting with someone I don’t constantly answer my phone–I check to see who is calling so that if it concerns one of my kids I’m going to answer it–but if it’s just a friend calling to catch up and I”m visiting with someone else I let it go to voice mail. I thought that’s what voice mail was for!

DB–I know a lot of adults who need to learn the same thing your daughter learned–that it is not rude to let your phone go to voice mail sometimes–it’s actually rude and intrusive to constantly answer it when you’re in the middle of other things!

jarvis

March 29th, 2011
9:23 am

Simple solution: phone goes to charge in the kitchen at 10 PM.

jarvis

March 29th, 2011
9:25 am

By the way, I didn’t have a bedtime after 9th grade.

I usually went to bed by 1:30 AM and was up by 6:00 AM. I did OK. I still don’t require much sleep to function. People are different when it comes to the amount of sleep they need.

Roberta Higginbotham

March 29th, 2011
9:25 am

Children sleep with phones under their pillows for one reason and one reason only – they’re allowed to.

Back in the day, if there were cell phones around, my parents would have NEVER allowed this to happen. Of course, back in the day, I would have only had a cell phone if I earned the money to pay for it every month.

Techmom

March 29th, 2011
9:25 am

In my house no calls after 9pm were allowed. My dad got up early for work but that was even true for weekends. I was the one who got grounded off using the phone if my friends called after 9pm. My dad said it was my responsibility to make them aware of the rule. We also only had 1 phone on the wall in the kitchen. I praised the day we got a cordless phone!

I leave my phone on vibrate most of the time and never answer if I’m in the company of friends or family unless it’s urgent. I can see when I have a missed call and will return it when appropriate. I have a friend who I’ve stopped going to lunch with b/c the last couple of times we’ve gone, she’s spent nearly the whole time taking other calls. Totally rude to think I would take time out of my day to see you face to face and then you have to the nerve to spend it talking to people who aren’t sitting in front of you.

Actually my bigger pet peeve lately is that people will only call cell phones. I know a lot of people don’t have home numbers but seriously, I do, use it! Even my son will just try my cell first. He learned his lesson this weekend though when he only called me on my cell phone to come pick him up when the event he was at got called off early. 45 minutes later when I saw the missed call, I called him from our home number. His excuse- my cell number shows up first on his list so he doesn’t have to scroll for “home”. I told him his 3-second laziness cost him an hour of sitting around. I simply do not carry cell with me at all times.

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
9:27 am

@ Betty…we typically do not answer the phone during dinner either: we check to see who it is. I rarely ever answer the toll free or private number calls, as they are usually not anything I need to fool with!

shaggy

March 29th, 2011
9:30 am

MJG,

I think your sneaking out comment is directed at jarvis, and once again I find it just plain weird if any shaggisms comes up at the dinner table…just plain weird.

Spacey

March 29th, 2011
9:46 am

I used to talk on the phone ALL the time at night. It drove my parents crazy! I watched television too, for hours – loved some reruns of MASH.
I would sneak the phone into my room. The other is probably my parents fault for allowing me a television. I was too irresponsible to police myself.
For my boys, no television/computers in their rooms ever! Maybe they won’t be as obsessed with the phone as a teenage girl? We will cross that bridge in many years when we get there… My thinking right now is that the phones go away at night.

Those were the days

March 29th, 2011
9:51 am

@Techmom

March 29th, 2011
8:34 am
@Me it’s too bad that parental controls have to be paid for on most carriers (it’s $4.99 extra per month). Not that most parents would even know how to set the limits though.

I know this option is available via Verizon. Having your kid go over their message usage can be co$tly too!

I rememember as a teenager/young adult to speak to a girl you had to go through their parents now they can just be contacted directly! I also remember a Dad that would interrupt our conversation to tell his daughter it was time for the call to end.

Betty

March 29th, 2011
9:54 am

While I realize the article concerns teens staying up all night texting etc, I’m curious to know at what age most of you approve of cell phones for your kids……..hope this isn’t too far off topic but I’m running into an awful lot of 9 year olds getting cell phones and just think it’s weird. While I doubt they’re staying up all night with them, I have been hearing alot about them texting each other after school and on weekends. Is this really becoming the norm so young?

JOD

March 29th, 2011
10:00 am

@Betty and MJG – I totally agree…we don’t answer the phone at dinner, and generally speaking, if I don’t recognize a number, I don’t answer. If it’s someone who actually needs to talk to me, they will leave a message, and I will call back. Hubs gets calls at all hours, usually work, and he gets the Wicked Witch look when it’s during meals – that usually ends the call quickly :o)

@Spacey – I’m with you. DD will not have a computer, TV, or phone in her room – ever!

@Techmom – Good for you! I carry my cell everyone, but oh, how I hate it! I can roll my office line to my cell, and I like to have it since DD’s school will call if she gets sick. It’s usually incoming calls only…

JOD

March 29th, 2011
10:02 am

@Betty – That’s a really good question – a potential topic? I’m not there yet, but would be interested to hear the age at which others are providing cell phones to their kids (or making the kid work if s/he wants to get one).

Cell phone pet peeve

March 29th, 2011
10:16 am

I know this is off the topic…but my BIGGEST pet peeve with cell phones today is that no listens to voice mails anymore. No one has the patience to go thru the steps to play back the message. They see “missed call” and call you back. So then you ask…”did you get my message”…response – “no…but I saw that you called so I just called you back”….so what that results in now is a whole bunch of adults now texting too! Am I the only one with this pet peeve?

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
10:18 am

@ shaggy…oops…you are correct and I apologize.

Since I speak with folks all across the country, most days ,and read lots of things on the internet, as does my husband…we talk about anything and everything at dinner. It is sad, to me, when we are out to eat together and couples near us are just looking at each other and eating…never say a word all through their meal. We are quite animated here and love to share what has been going on during the day with the rest of the crew.

Even more fun when I meet fellow bloggers for lunch and there are two of us can chat about the rest of the group…it is interesting to see what someone else’s take is on the words that are posted here!

I WAS curious if perhaps my kids ever tried to sneak out at night ( since jarvis called me on it) and thus asked my daughter. Her answer confirmed that I was correct…they did not.

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
10:19 am

ooops…the two of us can chat….sorry!

fer

March 29th, 2011
10:26 am

Your rules are perfect! Parents must retain control here, and if the kids don’t like it, then no phone at all. Easy enough! (Hey, I know it’s not that easy; just kidding. I know there will be lots of hand wringing and teeth gnashing, but stick to your guns, parents.)

Ummmm

March 29th, 2011
10:33 am

Why do kids have cell phones any way? When I was growing up in NYC, I didn’t have a cell phone until I was a senior in HS but now-a-days, kids have cell phones in elementary. Kids are NOT obligated to have the same devices as grown-ups UNTIL they can pay for those devices themselves.

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
10:55 am

@ ummm…when I was growing up we did not have microwaves in our kitchen nor in the dorm in college. We also had a party line on the dial up phone at home in HS. Some things are different. Our kids each had a phone when they hit 13 or 14 as they were on one plan and it added about $20 per month to our bill. Easier, when they needed to be picked up from school activities, sports, or music lessons!

Theresa Walsh Giarrusso

March 29th, 2011
10:58 am

Betty — one of my friends that I trust the most gave her daughter a cell phone in 6th grade mainly so they could communicate on schedule and being picked up. They are a very active family and have lots of commitments and changing skeds. I understand it was for the mom’s convenience but for me that is too early. I honestly hope to hold out until high school and as deep into high school as possible. I may be eating those words — I think rose would be accepting of waiting, I’m not sure on Walsh — he is my boundary pusher and my negotiator.

Theresa Walsh Giarrusso

March 29th, 2011
11:05 am

Techmom — the short term to longterm memory conversion is the big news of this story — we all know they are tired in the morning and are not getting enough sleep …. however if they can’t convert memories over that’s a whole bigger problem.

And it does explain why new moms get so dumb — you’re getting such broken sleep that you’re sleep deprived but you’re also not converting anything over — it makes so much sense!!! I swore I didn’t dream for like two years when I was nursing walsh because i never go into deep enough sleep.

we have a corollary texting topic popping up around 12 or 1 I think –

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
11:17 am

@ twg…sometimes, I have the STUPIDIST dreams! But at least I know I am dreaming and thus getting some sleep!

MyOpinion

March 29th, 2011
11:20 am

@JOD

My Dad got my youngest sister (age 10) a cell phone for her birthday last year. All of the older siblings (age 15-26) had to wait until age 15 to receive a cell phone. He got her a cell phone to teach responsibility because the last 15 yr old had a $500+ phone bill (for one month) from texting alone.

I did not receive a cell phone until my senior year of HS (2004, I was 17) when Verizon had a BOGO sell on phones that can be used with family talk, with my mother as the primary line. I was limited to 300 minutes a month with free nights and weekends after 9pm and I had to pay $6 for text ($5 for 200 messages plus tax), any additional minutes over 300 and for any games I downloaded on my phone. My mother paid for me to talk; I paid for all the extras.

Prior to getting my cell phone, I did use my mom’s cell when I wanted to talk in my room, but I had to make sure the phone was fully charged for her use by morning. I have slept with the phone under my pillow, but I’m a hard sleeper so sometime I did not even hear the phone ring.

IMO, age 10 is the youngest a child should be to receive a cell phone (and that’s really pushing it). At this age the phone should be able to call 911, parents, grandparents, siblings, and maybe a friend or two – no messaging. At age 12 (6th grade), include a few more friends and limited text. At age 14 (freshman in HS), provide limited minutes (with early nights and weekends) and limited text. Check bill for unauthorized use during school hours and take away accordingly.

MyOpinion

March 29th, 2011
11:29 am

@Ummmm

I think it is the fact that many people have done away with a landline and either don’t want their children on their phone or can’t have their children using the phone (company phone). Most students are not allowed to use the school’s phone to call home when something happens so parents provide a cell for communication. Also with the increase of activities it is easier for a parent to provide a cell to a child to call when he is ready to be picked up.

JOD

March 29th, 2011
11:39 am

@MyOpinion – Thanks! Sheesh – there are so many options for phones to consider now :o)

Ah, memories – I remember my first cell phone…think phone in a bag! It stayed under the seat in my car in high school with *strict* orders from Daddy NOT to use unless it was an emergency (meaning the presence of blood, probably). I’m not sure I actually used a cell phone for a few more years!

penguinmom

March 29th, 2011
11:53 am

Phone goes into the charger next to the door at night. Fortunately, my son is not that into texting or talking on the phone so not a big deal. He has one friend who calls him after 10:30pm but we are all still up at that point and the friend has gone through a hard time recently (death of a parent) so I allow a little more freedom in that situation.

@Betty – I also agree that we would have thought it was rude to call late at night. My family is an exception in our circle, I’d rather you call us late than early since we sleep in but stay up late. I don’t personally call anyone after 9:30 though unless I am sure they are up and I really need a quick answer. To me that’s what email is for.

@TWG – we got our son a pre-paid cell phone when he was 13 for Our convenience (and he knew that was the reason). It was a way to arrange picking him up or to find out information from him when we needed it. He wasn’t allowed to text anyone but us and we didn’t even like him to give out the number to non-family members. Now that he is 15, he is on our regular plan and has a little more freedom. Still not allowed to text excessively or anything like that.

Rockdale Resident

March 29th, 2011
12:01 pm

While I haven’t had to think of cell phones for my own elementary schooler yet, I cans ay that as a high school teacher, it is not uncommon at all for my students to tell me they were up until 2 or 3 am texting, and that their parents know about it. Surprisingly, these are the same children (most of the time) who drift off during notes, or tell me that they are “too tired” to do their work that day and are okay with taking a zero.

Mrs. G

March 29th, 2011
12:23 pm

My dad gave me my first cell phone when I was 17 (at the beginning of my senior year of high school) – in 2000. It was his old Nokia (the larger kind that look like landline portable phones…anyone remember those?). It was meant to be for emergencies and I didn’t use it much. Honestly, I had read about studies linking cell phone use to brain cancer and I wasn’t too keen on the idea.

That year, though, more and more friends got cell phones, so I used it a little more often (and felt “cool” having it), but it wasn’t a huge deal. I don’t remember ever being “on call” at night for phone calls (or texts; I remember I would text people and they wouldn’t write back – texting wasn’t cool yet!!!). The summer after I graduated from high school, I accidentally ruined the phone – the cup holder in my car was filled with Coke from a fast food drink cup that had leaked and I popped the phone into the cup holder when I got in the car. My dad offered to replace the phone (so that I would have one for emergencies, I guess) and I was elated – I was hoping for a tiny flip phone like all of my friends had. Well, we got to the AT&T store and my dad walked up to the salesman and purchased another large, chunky-looking Nokia (despite my protests and to my dismay!). I kept it until I got my own cell phone plan two years later.

My 11-year-old brother (who is a fifth grader), on the other hand, got an iPhone when he was 9. Times have changed! I think that he keeps it with him most of the time, except he doesn’t bring it to school usually because I don’t think that they are allowed. I’ll have to ask my mom if he sleeps with it in his room.

Betty

March 29th, 2011
12:40 pm

Wow Mrs G–an iPhone at 9! Are his friends envious or is it pretty much common-place for them too? My 8 year old keeps insisting that “all” of her friends are getting phones at 9 and I used to think she was exaggerating but now I’m starting to see some of them with phones and realizing that while not “all” of them have phones, some of them definitely do. Now I’ve got yet another thing to say NO to! The list keeps growing…………….

MomsRule

March 29th, 2011
12:56 pm

We haven’t had any issues with late night calls or texting. I’m not surprised that this is an issue for some though.

Mrs. G

March 29th, 2011
1:06 pm

Betty – All of his friends seem to have them, too – I don’t think that he’s the first. It floors me! My husband and I swear that we’re going to get our kids one of those phones that can only store, like, three numbers in them (and can make emergencycalls)…let’s hope they still make them when the time comes. :)

[...] (Is your teen losing sleep and interrupting their learning cycle by texting at night? Check out our … [...]

Becky

March 29th, 2011
1:25 pm

No teens at my house, so this isn’t an issue for us..Yet..Growing up, we weren’t allowed to have phone calls after 9:00..That is still my rules for my cell phone..We don’t have a land line and when we did, if you called me after 9:00/9:30, your house needed to be on fire or someone was dead.. Part of that is that I have neices in KY, that don’t work (whole nother topic) and one would call me at 1 or 2 (collect) in the morning and want to know what I was doing? Hello..This is a grown woman no less..

The boy is wanting a cell phone (be 9 in June)..Not sure that he will get one though..Have been debating on that..His logic is that he can use it when he’s at home and his parents won’t let him use their phone..Of course if he gets one, the sister thinks that she has to have one..:~)

Becky

March 29th, 2011
1:29 pm

@Mrs G.. Will you Dad adopt me? :~)

justmy2cents

March 29th, 2011
1:36 pm

Simple solution- take the phone from them at night and turn it off.

My 12 year old has a cell phone, and has since she was 11 for one reason only…*I* have to know she made it on the bus in the morning since middle school starts so late. Her bus stop is at an extremely busy intersection, and she is the only child in the neighborhood on that bus. It is for my peace of mind only. She comes home and the phone comes right to me! She has unlimited texting, but is only allowed to text her friends on weekends….grades/chores/attitude permitting.

catlady

March 29th, 2011
5:50 pm

When I was growing up (and my kids as well) that phone HAD BETTER NOT RING after 9 pm unless there had been a death in the family! I have followed this same rule all my life. I don’t call my kids after 9 pm unless I am calling from the hospital, and even then I think twice.

Neither of my older kids had cells until college. The younger one had one starting in 10th grade, which saved me some time with band, cheerleader, and theater practice waits. Since we live 18 miles from town, it was important not to make extra trips. Could we have managed without one? Sure, and we did (she had similar after school activities from 6th grade on) and I just showed up , and those darned practices had better be over on time! I kept a check on her minutes/texts, and if they had been late-night, you can be darned sure she would have lost that phone!

motherjanegoose

March 29th, 2011
9:29 pm

catlady…I am the 9-9 rule. No calls before 9 and no calls after 9, unless it is important or I know that someone is at their desk at work.

I just think there are 12 other hours in the day to connect and folks might need their privacy!