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Momania: A Blog for Busy Moms

Using technology to monitor their spring break safety?

10:55 pm March 10, 2011, by Theresa Walsh Giarrusso

I have a corollary question to the spring break blog from AJC reporter Jill Vejnoska. Jill is wondering how parents are using technology to monitor their kids’ safety on spring break?

Are they secretly/or obviously checking their teen’s Facebook photos and Twitter feeds to make sure nothing bad is going down? (As we said before they can block their parents from certain Facebook photos even if they are “friends.”) Do you think they hold back knowing you’re looking?

Are you having your teen take photos of where they are right then and sending it to you? (A mom and Y told me she makes her teens do that. I love that idea.)

And finally, what are you going to do with the knowledge that their competing in wet T-shirt contests – tell them to be good over the cell phone? Drive down there?

So are you keeping track of their safety or their behavior via technology and if so how?

Also if you would like to be featured in Jill’s story you can email her at Jill.Vejnoska@ajc.com.

(There are two spring break blogs today and a third topic will pop up around 1 pm. Be sure to see the list of the safest and worst spring break spots. )

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How safe is your teen's spring break spot? | Momania: A Blog for Busy Moms

March 10th, 2011
11:07 pm

[...] have two spring break blogs up today. Will you be monitoring your teen’s safety via technology while they unwind and dare I say part…I will have a third unrelated topic pop up around 1 [...]

DB

March 11th, 2011
2:07 am

My wonderful mother-in-law passed down a philosophy: “Don’t ask questions you don’t want to know the answers to.” If my kids are young enough to need a leash such as Facebook monitoring and having them take photos of wherever they are, they are too young to go by themselves, period. There. Problem solved.

If they are old enough to go on a spring break trip on their own, they can do it without me breathing down their neck. My daughter went to Panama City last Thanksgiving to chill with a girlfriend for a couple of days. She left me their address. That was the extend of my “monitoring”. My son is finishing up a cruise to the Bahamas and Key West this week. I got some text messages from him today as they hit Key West — but that was it. No, he wasn’t required to check in every day. Good grief. In three months, he will be a college graduate and may be living hundreds of miles from home. He may be my son, but he will also be his own man. And isn’t that the whole idea?

I look at their Facebook pages, but at this point, it’s more of an academic interest in what they are doing rather than monitoring it for questionable behavior.

Fremont's 47 Year Old Midget™

March 11th, 2011
7:07 am

My kid, Kentavius, put GPS tracker on me, so I would quit sneakin up on him. He is a fine boy. I can’t wait for his release.

motherjanegoose

March 11th, 2011
8:08 am

Not someone who checks up on Facebook. Our son went to St. Thomas and a few other islands, on a cruise his senior year at UGA. That was 2 years ago. We assumed, that since he was 21, he did not need our input. He sent us pictures of the islands he visited, while there. We laughed that he was having a better vacation than we were….but he was paying for it himself too! Daughter is home in bed now…so I know exactly where she is.

JJ

March 11th, 2011
8:38 am

My daughter is on her way to PCB as I type this, and yes I’m a little worried. BUT, she’s a good kid, she has worked very hard in school, and I think she deserves this trip. I know she will be drinking. We talked about it. I have an open communication with my daughter, I always have. I told her to call me when she got to the condo, but she did not need to check in with me every day. This is her time to stretch those wings……

What I do worry about is all the other irresponsible kids…..however, there’s really nothing I can do about that. Just hope my daughter makes good choices and decisions while she is down there…….

Becky

March 11th, 2011
9:52 am

No high schoolers yet, so..:~)

Denise

March 11th, 2011
11:26 am

You all know that I’m not a parent so maybe you think I’m speaking out of my butt but that’s okay. But I think if you have to go thru all that – having them take pictures of where they are at random times – then you should not let them go alone. If you think they are responsible enough to go alone, leave them with a few instructions – maybe check in once a day – and be done with it. Don’t stress them to the point they can’t have fun and don’t stress yourself to the point you can’t rest until they are home. Presumably you are raising them to be responsible so let them show you that they are learning. If they show themselves to be irresponsible then don’t let them go again. I know it’s not as simple in practice as I’m making it sound on paper but at a certain point, parents and children have to find a way to be separate from each other and be comfortable with it.

My parents were very lenient with us (more so with my younger brother, which I thought was bogus!). As long as they knew and approved of where we were, who we were with and when we were coming home, they were good. If we were going to be later than the original time we told them, we called and told them that we were going to be out later. If it was reasonable they just said “okay”. If it was not, then they told us to come home. When we were in college, we had to call and say where we were going and with whom. I was open with who my friends were so when I said a name my parents knew what I was talking about and that was that. If it was a strange name I had to answer some questions and that was that. I was 8 hours away from home. What could they do? Whip me? Punish me off the phone? Nothing. They had to trust that they did their jobs.

Just so you know I’m not anti-parent/child check-in – I am 38 years old but I call my parents and brother to let them know that I’m going out of town and when I make it back. They do the same with me. No we don’t live in the same state. It’s just something we’ve always done – check in. That way no one is worried when they call the home phones and no one answers for a few days in a row.

JJ

March 11th, 2011
12:13 pm

Before cell phones, I had to check in with my parents when I would go out of town. They always had the number of the hotel or wherever I was staying, and I had to call when I arrived. I didn’t have to check in every day, but I did, just to let them know I was ok. It’s just common courtesy. I used to have to call them when we were leaving too……

As for my daughter in PCB…..I hope she has a grand time, and makes memories that she will always remember!!!!

Denise

March 11th, 2011
1:22 pm

JJ – we’ve just gotten in the habit of talking before the trip, even if just “hey – did I tell you I was going to California? No? Well I’m in the airport…” even by cell. When family calls me on my cell while I’m out on vacation I get nervous. Usually it’s not just to chat because they know I’m out kicking it. :-) That’s why I say that if you let them go, let them GO…and kick it!

JJ

March 11th, 2011
1:31 pm

Denise – I’ve been “kicking it” since she left for school, 2 years ago….LOL…

newblogger

March 11th, 2011
5:19 pm

Mine is enjoying his 6th day at Panama City Beach. He didn’t have to check in every day but he did because he wanted to. His text every day? “Morning mom. I’m alive and well and not in jail!” Love that kid!

Mattie

March 13th, 2011
2:38 pm

@newblogger, that’s the type of text I get from my kids too. I love it!

All I ask is a text letting me know when my sons have arrived at their destination, and again when they are back in school.

Middle son is home this week, job hunting for the summer, and he goes out every night until the very wee hours. I would almost rather he had gone away so I wouldn’t have to worry about him until he pulls into the driveway.

Youngest is doing a Habitat build, and has texted me regularly with updates on how well the townspeople are feeding him. This morning I was texted that Presbyterians do sweet tea better than Methodists. He’s all about the food, lol.

Oillie Ollie

March 13th, 2011
3:32 pm

I check whats shakin on facebook looking up family and friends. It is really rather boring. My grandson is looking at broadcast journalism. He starred in the school musical. I figure i was young once and had my shot at something, but there was a lot of family interference. I am giving my family the chance to be themselves without a lot of silly monitoring.

We all have a life, doing something with it is a whole different story. I am a compulsive commenter, I just read that the owner of the AJC is a billionaire. That is my goal, however, I may fall short. I worked out today at the Y, half mile in the pool and 3 miles on the treadmill.

Active Duty Mom

March 13th, 2011
4:34 pm

Why does this clip from “The Onion” come to mind? http://www.theonion.com/video/facebook-twitter-revolutionizing-how-parents-stalk,14364/.

Sedgrid Lewis

March 14th, 2011
10:14 am

Make sure that your teen is not engaging cyberbullying over the spring break. Lot of teens have free time on their hands without parental supervision.

http://www.facebook.com/#!/cyberbullyapp

b

March 14th, 2011
2:21 pm

Our kids haven’t gone on Spring Break with a group of friends while they were/are in High School. We didn’t feel that was appropriate for them. Oldest worked week-long camps and made quite a bit of money. Younger finds that the golf course is rather empty that week and golfs all day. Oldest is now a senior in college and is on break this week with some friends. Text from FL to let us know they arrived safely. Doubt we will hear anything more until they are ready to leave unless a question arises about something. Hard to let go but have to let them off the apron strings sometime.

asdgasdg

March 15th, 2011
4:12 pm

http://i55.tinypic.com/vy1f9l.jpg