About two weeks ago my 9-year-old came home very upset and said some girls were being mean to her. She said this one girl in particular was picking on her in different classes and multiple times.
The first stuff she told me seemed like the girl was being bossy and pretty easy to deal with. The other item was that the little girl was talking about Rose and making fun of her to another little girl in music class. Apparently they didn’t think Rose was doing the dance moves correctly. Rose felt like it was obvious they were talking about her.
It’s hard for me to tell if Rose is being overly sensitive or if this little girl is going after her. Rose kept tearing up telling me but first three months of school never mentioned this little girl or her being mean to her. So did she have a bad day or has it built up all the time?
I don’t know the little girl or her family. I mentioned it another mom at school whose daughter is friends with Rose. She said her daughter had mentioned similar things. She said she though the other little girl was actually the hormonal one. She said she was very hot and cold to her daughter.
I want Rose to learn to handle things herself but then I keep thinking about that little boy last year that hung himself after allegedly being bullied. So I want to take her complaints seriously and want her to know I am concerned and there to help her.
Do I need to let the teacher know just so she’s aware of just let the little girls work it out for themselves?
I told Rose that that if the little girl tried to boss her she should tell her that she had things under control and to please mind her own business. The dance moves are tough. It’s a lot harder to confront someone if you think they’re talking about you and not come off a little bit crazy. I told her if she felt brave she could say “I would appreciate it if you would stop talking about me.” She said she might say that if her friend stood next to her.
I asked Rose what was going on lately with the little girl and she said her friend defended her one day and the little girl has backed off.
I still can’t decide if I should mention the tension to the teacher so she can keep her eye on things or just wait and see what happens? Also still not sure how to evaluate a bad day versus a hormonal day versus girls just being mean to each other?
Please give advice on analyzing hormones and little girls being mean to each other? How do you handle? When you inform the teacher, other parents? At what level do you just leave it for your child to handle? Do you let them handle but let the teacher know it’s going down?