What age can kids fly alone?

We accompanied Michael on a business trip recently and were shocked to see two separate parties of very young children flying alone across country!! I am not talking about flying from Georgia to Florida. I am talking about 2,000 miles across country! (More on the trip later but for now let’s discuss this shocking parental decision.)

We watched as two different sets of grandparents kissed kids and sent them down the jet way. I literally had my hand over my mouth as I watched the grandparents kiss the kiddos goodbye. Even my kids noticed. “Are those kids flying alone?”

One set was two sisters and they were probably like 9 and 11. The other two were the cutest and tiniest little brother and sister. I talked to the sister while waiting at the bathroom, and she told me that she was 5!!!! And her brother was 7. She told me they were going to have to change planes!!!

They kids seemed to do well. I didn’t hear any screaming or any freakouts. The little pair did go to the bathroom quite a bit. But I have to say I definitely did not see the flight attendants giving either pair very much attention. They were on their own.

I was freaking out because it looked like our seats weren’t going to be together and Rose and Walsh were going to have to sit next to each other but apart from both of us.  I can’t imagine sending my 7-year-old cross country in charge of a 5-year-old.

So what do you think: Would you send a 7-year-old and 5-year-old across country alone? Would you put them on an indirect flight? (Hello you’re saving money by not accompanying them  — pop for the direct freaking flight!)

Have you ever let your kids fly alone? How far? How many legs?

What is the youngest age you would let fly alone or with a sibling?

92 comments Add your comment

Aquagirl

July 29th, 2010
12:29 pm

Why not? It’s not like pilots or flight attendants are, y’know, doing anything else.

I don’t think it’s a matter of helicopter-momming, it’s a matter of thinking others should be responsible for taking care of your kids. Maybe a surcharge for unattended children is in order.

LWA

July 29th, 2010
12:32 pm

@LA .. I have looked for the GA law and I can’t find where it says that there is a limit. Please send me the link. She is going to put the food on when her Dad is almost home. It is not a requirement for dinner. There is food there. Again, just want to see if she is ready. No worries if not.

Also, you can get a gate pass to pick up a minor who is traveling alone. I have done so lots of times so when my child exits, I was right there waiting for her. You can also get a ticket to take them to the gate. This applies if you pay the minor fee or not. I have done both.

LC

July 29th, 2010
1:20 pm

I think it depends on the maturity level of the child. My son started flying as an unacompanied minor on his 5th birthday. He flew from Atlanta to Chicago so much he actually became an elite member. Never had one issue. He is now 12 and flies alone. I still get a gate pass and meet him at the door. My son is more mature than most kids and he is a better traveller than most adults. Many people are forced to have their children fly alone due to the increased fees for airline tickets. I worry more about my son spending time in front of the TV or the computer than I do flying… but to each his own.

LC

July 29th, 2010
1:22 pm

@Lori BTW You can and do get gate passes with out flying…. Whether your child flies unaccompanied or not.

N

July 29th, 2010
1:24 pm

This blog gets more interesting everyday. You were surprised that an 11yr old was flying alone. Have you NEVER flown before??? This is not new. Agree with the other posters who think its appropriate and a good experience.

cewbee

July 29th, 2010
1:25 pm

Sometimes you don’t have a choice. My divorce decree required that my son spend every other weekend with his Dad even though he lived out-of-state. So we did the drill starting when he was age 10 where I would drive down to the airport, accompany him to the gate (the person who posted saying you cannot go to the gate is wrong – you can always get a gate pass for an unaccompanied minor) and stay there until “wheels up”. My son knew what to do if there were problems but we really never had any. Today he is a confident, competent, independent 20 year old who spent last summer in France by himself on a study abroad program. Need to trust your children. They are capable of far more than you ever dreamed!

LSUTiger

July 29th, 2010
1:26 pm

Parents Listen! Children should NEVER fly alone for any reason. Also, NO babies or children under 10 years of age should never fly with or without parents. When when parents learn that passengers HATE to hear screaming babies and children and it’s not always the fault of the child..it’s the poor upbringing by the parents.

Peachy

July 29th, 2010
1:30 pm

@Lori – all this, ” The kid needs to be able to get to the plane, board when called, sit quietly alone, get off the plane, be responsible for his/her belongings, navigate the receiving airport, find his/her ride when they get there. ” is not true. You are able to obtain a pass to take your minor to the gate or be able to pick them up. You don’t have to have a boarding pass. And the flight attendents help them with their belonings. Then when they reach the destination the other party is there to pick them up (with their special pass)…so not nearly that big of a deal.

Wow, what rock...

July 29th, 2010
1:46 pm

…doe LSUTiger live under where she/he thinks that no kid under age 10 should ever fly? Must be the Katrina hangover….

Tiger Ochocinco Mellencamp

July 29th, 2010
1:49 pm

Not to be overly critical here, but when I read TWG’s reaction to these kids flying alone (i.e. “I literally had my hand over my mouth”…”I was freaking out” because her 10 year old couldn’t sit next to her on the plane), that lady in NYC who had her 10 year old learn to navigate the subways alone seems comparatively rational.

Cammi317

July 29th, 2010
2:02 pm

LWA the minimum legal age that a child can be left home for a couple of hours in Georgia is 12. At 14 a child can be left home for the day. I am going to look for that info and post it.

Angela

July 29th, 2010
2:03 pm

again: freerangekids . com
many will gain much insight and freedom from this site

additionally, people do pay a fee to fly kids unaccompanied. At 5 and 7, most kids may not be mature enough to handle a walk in the park, much less a plane ride. There are though MANY kids from 8 and up who are more than mature enough to fly alone under the eyes of the attendant.

Also, I didn’t quite understand T’s story about the gparents kissing them goodbye. Was this at the gate? at the ticket counter? I would request a gate pass and wait with the kids until they boarded the plane, but that is about it.

Old School

July 29th, 2010
2:07 pm

I think it also depends on the individual child. I’ve seen well-behaved young children who quite capably flew alone and I’ve seen teenagers & adults who should have flown in a cramped cat box in the cargo hold.

srh

July 29th, 2010
2:16 pm

I flew alone to Germany when I was 12, way back in the 70s. My parents were from Europe and my sisters and I (there were 3 of us) would each go every third year, alone. My relatives would be on the other side of course, but I also took the train and buses to other countries while I was there, on my own, like France, Belgium and Italy. Not sure I would do that now, but that is how things were in my family back then. One of my relatives would also come over here for the summer, so we traded out kids. I am very independent now, so maybe that’s how I became that way. When I travel now, I love to go off the beaten path and am comfortable in any language or culture.

TechMom

July 29th, 2010
2:20 pm

Even Delta thinks you can give your child a GREAT experience!

Children Traveling Alone: Learn ways to give your child (ages 5-14) a great, and safe, experience

Some highlights:
Unaccompanied service is required for all children 5–14 years old when not traveling in the same compartment with an adult at least 18 years old or the child’s parent/legal guardian.
Children ages 5–7 years can only fly on nonstop or direct flights with no change of planes.
Children ages 8–14 years can fly on nonstop or connecting flights, but may not connect to other airlines, with the exception of Delta Connection carriers.
Delta will allow unaccompanied minors to be interlined to/from KLM and Air France ONLY.
Children 15–17 are not required to have unaccompanied service but we will provide it when requested.
An unaccompanied child can not be booked on the last connecting flight of the evening. This is to prevent the need for an overnight stay in a hotel.
Unaccompanied minors will not be permitted on red eye flights greater than 2 hours in duration departing 9pm-5am.

One (only one) parent or guardian must accompany children ages 5–14 to the departure gate and must:
Obtain proper documentation from the Delta Ticket Counter to pass through airport security checkpoints.
Remain in the gate area until the plane takes off.

During Travel
A Delta flight attendant will keep tickets and other travel documents throughout the flight.
Children under the age of 15 will not be seated in an exit row.
Your child will not be released to anyone other than the person previously designated by the parent or guardian to pick them up.

The adult picking them up must:
Arrive at the airport early.
Obtain proper documentation from the Delta Ticket Counter to pass through security checkpoints.
Be in the gate area prior to the plane arriving to meet the child.
Show identification.
Sign an Acceptance of Responsibility form.

HB

July 29th, 2010
2:25 pm

Re: age a child can stay home alone

I’m pretty sure Georgia doesn’t have a law on this, but recommended guidelines. I want to say the recommended minimum age for being alone for short periods of time is 8 or 9. Definitely not 12.

Sam

July 29th, 2010
2:41 pm

You need to read the book “The Blessing of a Skinned Knee” – it would be helpful for any parent who has anxiety about their children.

You need to be okay with your children doing things without you. Trust that you have taught them the lessons they will need to be good people.

Becky

July 29th, 2010
2:49 pm

I’m all for kids learning to be independent, but no way in HADES would I leave a 10 year old at home all day alone..No where, no how, no way..
I thought it was a law that they couldn’t be left alone all day until 12 or 13..

TechMom

July 29th, 2010
2:50 pm

@HB, I think you are right in that GA does not have a law regarding the age a child can be left alone at home. In fact, very few states do.

The Red Cross has a babysitting course for 11-15 year olds. If an 11 year old is responsible enough to babysit, s/he was probably responsible enough to be home alone at 10.

Age restrictions should be treated as guidelines and parents shouldn’t use these rules or laws as anything more than a recommendation. If you don’t think your kid can handle a 2 hour flight alone at the age of 10, then they probably shouldn’t stay home by him/herself. Then again I had no qualms with putting my 5 year old on a flight to Dallas nor did I have an issue with letting him stay home for a couple of hours by himself when he was 10-11. I started babysitting at the age of 11 and while I trusted my son to stay by himself at that age, he didn’t have the ability to think about taking another human being at 11. It really depends on the kid.

Renee

July 29th, 2010
2:53 pm

There are too many weirdos out there. Who in their right mind sends their 5 or 7 year old someplace alone on an unsupervised flight across the country?! If they have to change planes, that’s even worse an offense. People leave their kids in the car alone, while they shop in stores, or run into daycares (and watch their cars get stolen). This ranks up there with that.

A

July 29th, 2010
3:01 pm

DB, we should really go have a beer somewhere. You’re pretty solid.
Bye.

catlady

July 29th, 2010
3:26 pm

My younger daughter few alone to England at 14. After the passengers were loaded she asked the flight attendant if, as an unaccompanied minor, she would ride first class if there was an empty seat, AND THEY GAVE HER THE ONE THAT WAS OPEN! (So, apparently, she was less innocent than I thought) I would have allowed her to fly with her older sister just about anywhere when big sis was about that age (little sis would have been 5, brother would have been 10).

DB

July 29th, 2010
3:29 pm

@A: Not a big beer drinker, but I’ll match you Diet Coke for beer!

catlady

July 29th, 2010
3:45 pm

MJg, I have sent t my info to forward to you.

Tiger Ochocinco Mellencamp

July 29th, 2010
4:15 pm

@Renee….I think you touched on the rub of this whole thing. One camp here feels as if the flight is “unsupervised”, in your words, because the PARENT is not there to supervise. The other camp feels as if the precautions set in place to have Flight Attendant and Airline personnel supervising their children to be adequate and reasonable. It’s evident that TWG and others don’t feel as if anyone other than themselves and those they’ve personally vetted at length (i.e. teachers who let them be classroom mommies, babysitters who are children of friends, and sometimes a spouse) can adequately supervise their children, whereas others feel as if strangers who are charged with the responsibility of supervising their children will carry out those duties professionally. TWG will never accept that those folks could supervise her children to her standards. And I believe she’s right..those folks will never meet HER standards. Of course, I think her standards are JACKED. I think if her children pulled half the crap on a stranger responsible for watching them as they do her (based on her own posts about her difficulty disciplining them and getting them to follow her rules), those kids might be in for a rude awakening when the FA tells them to sit down and shut up and act more mature than their years. To that extent, TWG would be appalled that the FA didn’t dote on them, ask them to explain to them all their concerns and fears, then make everything better by giving them a piece of candy or something like that.

So I think you exemplified the point well. Whereas many of us in this camp who might be inclined to send their child unaccompanied on a flight would have a SERIOUS discussion with our child that went somewhere along the lines of:

“Listen to me, that person right there is filling in for me on this flight….you will be polite and respectful and do everything he/she requests with the utmost manners. You will not misbehave and you will not cause him/her any problems, just like you wouldn’t do with me. You will stick with that person like glue when you are out of your seat. If you need anything, raise your hand to get his/her attention. If anyone approaches you and scares you, you should immediately leave your seat and find that person and tell them your concerns. But as long as you’re being left alone to play your DS and don’t need anything, then don’t bother him/her. You’re a great kid, and I love you very much, so just be as wonderfully well mannered for him/her as you are for me and your mother all the time and you’ll do fine. But make no mistake, if I hear from this person that you were in any way bratty, spoiled, or disrepectful, when you get home, you’re whole world is going to come down on top you. I love you, have a great trip and tell grandma and grandpa thank you for letting you visit.”

That would take care of things with my kid, but then again, treating my kid like he’s my age instead of his is probably not sensitive enough for those on the other side of the fence.

Cammi317

July 29th, 2010
4:41 pm

Got this from the Georgia DHR site “Children age 13 and older generally can be left home alone, but shouldn’t be left home overnight. Children under 8 years of age, however, should never be left home alone even for short periods of time. Parents must assess the maturity and responsibility of their children before deciding whether or not to leave a child alone. ” But it does not list a specific law…http://dhr.georgia.gov/portal/site/DHS/menuitem.3d43c0fad7b3111b50c8798dd03036a0/?vgnextoid=fce338426162c010VgnVCM100000bf01010aRCRD&vgnextchannel=5a236f865309b010VgnVCM100000bf01010aRCRD

Cammi317

July 29th, 2010
4:46 pm

This information from Georgia DHR is more specific about what age kids can be left alone and under what circumstances people should report someone. It specifically says children 9-12 may not be left home for more than 2 hours. http://www.odis.dhr.state.ga.us/…/3030_cps/Manuals/Chapter3/Lack%20of%20Supervision%20Reference%20Guide.doc – Text Version

Theresa Walsh Giarrusso

July 29th, 2010
4:55 pm

when did tiger get so mean????

motherjanegoose

July 29th, 2010
4:58 pm

@catlady, I sent my info to T yesterday to send to you. Nothing yet. We will just have to sit and wait.

@ A…I will vouch for DB, she is very solid and can be fun too….:)

@ Renee…there are weirdos that live right in our neighborhoods too and they can come and go as they please. The airplane is a bit more controlled, plus each passenger’ s legal name is listed on the flight manifest ( is that it lakerat?).

There are folks playing in our neighborhood tennis court and at the pool who are completely random to me and no way would we be able to track them down if they snatched a children and took off in a vehicle with either no tag or the wrong tag.

@ Tiger…you will not be surprised to learn that I have had to have a few words with unsupervised children who are on the verge of impeding the flight plan. As we all know, some kids know how to behave and some do not.

Once, we were landing in DFW and on approach. The plane was filled with cheerleaders ( on the way home from a national competition) and NO they were not the Dallas Cowboy variety ( who we assume know how to travel). Anyway, the flight attendants reminded the passengers to buckle up and prepare for landing. Of course, the cheerleaders were exempt from that rule and were still able to romp down the aisles freely. NOT

The pilot came on and made this announcement:

“If you cheerleaders do not sit down immediately we will have to cancel our approach and lose our landing position. We need you to sit down NOW! ”

I am assuming the flight attendants had had enough of the scenario and spoke with the captain.

The mothers had also had enough of the girls and it appeared many of them had a few drinks en route.

Guess how I feel about MS and HS cheerleaders….:)

irisheyes

July 29th, 2010
5:09 pm

I want to meet the parents of the 5 yo and 7 yo to find out what they’ve done to make their kids so independent and capable! Those are two kids who I would be proud to call mine.

T, it’s time to start letting of your kids. Now, I don’t mean that you send them off to make their way in the world, but you need to believe that they can handle life without you. Your flight was a great teaching opportunity about how mommy and daddy won’t always be able to watch them, and that they need to practice behaving the way they have been taught.

Tiger Ochocinco Mellencamp

July 29th, 2010
5:16 pm

@TWG…oh come now…there’s a difference between being mean and critical. I’ll admit, on this topic I’m very critical of you. But I never resort to name calling or cheap shots that can’t be supported with precedent. You’re a journalist, you know the difference……were woodward and bernstein being mean when they completely trashed Nixon’s actions?? No, they were being critical when a subject matter called for it. I’ll give you I’m cynical and sarcastic, which may make my arguments appear a little more caustic than your average bear’s, but the bottom line is that any impression that I have gotten about you being an overprotective, hovering parent too concerned about them seeing the world through rose colored glasses, resulting in your kids frequently testing you and their teachers with disciplinary issues, is directly attributable to your posts.

We’ve all seen mean comments on this blog…and I mean really mean ones. On the rare ocassion have crossed that line…and those have been exclusively aimed at other bloggers..not you.

Now I’m going to go have a good cry about you calling me mean until I get an apology….;-)

Active Duty Mom

July 29th, 2010
5:51 pm

Tiger, great comments and too true! Heck, my first solo airplane trip was when I was 6 and my parents had just divorced. Granted, this was out of the old Atlanta airport and the flight time was only about an hour but it was still no big deal. My husband grew up in NYC and took the subway and the bus regularly as a kid because that is how you got around and went to school. We’re talking the 1970s-1980s when the city was pretty rough. Whether or not a child should travel alone depends on the maturity of the child, but the child is also going to take their cues from their parents as to how they will act and react to situations. Irisheyes, too true about kids being able to handle life without mommy and daddy being around all the time. Unfortunately I am now working with a lot of young adults who weren’t taught this when they were children and oh boy has it been interesting–UGH!

deidre_NC

July 29th, 2010
5:52 pm

it just all boils down to whether your kid is mature enough to fly alone. i know kids age 10 and up who shouldnt even be taken to a nice restaurant. you really need to prepare your kids to be self sufficient as early as possible. that doesnt mean they dont need you…it means that if a situation every arises they will have an idea of how to handle it. some of my kids friends scare me to death at their ignorance on how to handle anything out of the ordinary. most of the kids here where i live are very self sufficient. we live very rural and it is just how it is. they stay alone..they cook…they know how to take care of themselves. i would be more worried at my college age daughter going to a ‘beach weekend’ than i was when the 10 yo was flying alone. not that i would stop her from going…hopefully she has enough sense by now to know what ok or not ok…you just cant keep them on the sofa…and what about sleep over camps…to me that is more worrisome than flying alone.

motherjanegoose

July 29th, 2010
6:11 pm

@ tiger…I am pretty sure that was not Theresa posting. There was an imposter ( sp?) yesterday who spelled her last name wrong and perhaps learned his/her lesson. To my knowledge, T does not usually rag on anyone here. Not really her style. I could be wrong!

penguinmom

July 29th, 2010
6:22 pm

@cammi – read further, it says a child younger than 13 “who exhibits exceptional maturity and has participated in a course on babysitting may be left alone or to care for other children.”
Still doesn’t indicate that it is a law, just guidelines for DFACS workers if they run across one of these children.
We left our eldest home alone with the younger kids for short times starting when he was 10. He’s now 14 and for a year has been able to babysit the younger kids(ages 10 and 6) including fixing them dinner. Last week, my kids fixed dinner for my husband after I went to a mom’s meeting. Fortunately, the worst thing we have to worry about with our 3 kids is that they might decide to watch TV for too long or play too many Wii games while we are gone. Even that they tend to regulate each other to make sure they don’t end up getting into trouble when we get home.

Mika

July 30th, 2010
1:13 am

That’s exactly my problem right now.. I left my husband two wks ago bcoz of domestic violence and my daughter is not even citizen here yet.. Were supposed to file her paper but things went wrong coz i can’t stand my husband watching my daughter locking her in a closet or in a bathroom.. My problem now is she is going to be an illegal alien in three weeks time.. I’m thinking to put her n a plane and let her fly alone coz thats the only way i can do it.. since i left my husband and i dont have money to accompany me.. She is just 5 but very smart girl.. I’m confused and having trouble to decide.. I don’t know what’s gonna happen with us here either if i keep her with me when her visa’s run out.. What is the best thing to do?

La

July 30th, 2010
12:44 pm

Are there any flight attendants or cabin personnel out there who can comment on the responsibility of taking on an unaccompanied minor (or minors)? The kids I’ve seen on flights alone have been well behaved – sometimes the flight attendant paid them special attention and sometimes he or she was too busy to do so. In fact, I’ve seen more problems with kids flying with parents than without.

Maybe being away from the ‘rents gives kids an incentive to act more mature, or maybe those parents who planned to send their kids into the wild blue yonder unaccompanied were just really good at preparing them for the flight and the expectations for their behavior.

La

July 30th, 2010
12:50 pm

Penguinmom and LWA. Kudos for having “exceptionally mature” kids. I still wouldn’t have a 10-year old turning on an oven or taking on tasks that use potentially dangerous equipment. If there is a problem such as a fire or even smoke that draws a fire truck, you are going to have that child removed by DFACS for placing her at risk. In other words, you can leave your child alone and have her do risky tasks for you until “something happens”. Probably nothing bad will happen, but is it worth the risk just to get the casserole on the table 45 minutes earlier?

YJB

August 1st, 2010
12:25 am

I’m 11, turning 12 soon and I would LOVE to fly on an aeroplane alone to the USA from AU. But my parents will not budge. I ENVY ALL THE LAID-BACK PARENTS OUT THERE WITH KIDS LIKE ME.

Ole Guy

August 9th, 2010
8:33 am

I’ve seen kids on the aircraft, both accompanied and solo, behaving poorly and doing their best to be a general pain in the six. Quite possibly, the seemingly rude behavior of cabin crew toward the kid was simply a form of possitive, assertive communication toward a bratt accustomed to behaving any ole damn way the spirit may move. We certainly observe many adults displaying similar behavior, and all the crew can say is “yes sir no sir three bags full sir”.

My first solo flight (not at the controls), at age 9, was from Pensacola to Philadelphia. The ole Eastern Airlines Martin 404, known, in Eastern Livery as the Golden Falcon, took all day, with a coupla stops in between. When I mentioned, to the stewardess, that my Dad was a Naval Aviator and he had taken me up, a few times, in a small airplane, the Captain relinquished his seat, for a few moments, to a wide-eyed kid who knew, right then and there, what he wanted to do (in reality, that decision had been reached the first time Dad took me up in an ole Yellow Cub).

Unfortunately, the days of innocense are long-gone. The days when parents thought nothing of the kid disappearing all day on his bike to seek adventure with friends; to come home smelling like a wet rat and looking like hell, and all Mom had to say was “go get cleaned up for supper”. Of course, there would be no approaching the table until passing Dad’s inspection…but that’s another story for teary-eyed ole farts with boring tales of yesteryear.

terezie roberts

August 10th, 2010
8:56 am

I don’t know why everything is such a big problem over here.I love living in US but when I speak to my friends in Europe I envy them that they have the courage sending their kids walking to school or letting them play alone at the playground .
It is not less dangerous in Europe but for some reason people are not as freaked out .
I don’t understand why everybody is talking about the good old days when everything was safe and now it is not .For me the biggest difference is the information .We know what happened at the other site of the world in seconds and yet we don’t know the name of our neighbor .
I will try to raise my kids independently as much as I can without being called a bad mother by some “caring ” people . Kids will not learn how to be responsible for their own actions if we are standing
behind their backs at all times .
I am planning to send my kids over to Europe on their own.It is not a big deal though because their is a flight attendant watching over them until they reach my parents at their destination .
At least that is a service that Lufthansa offers and I have never heard any complaints .
I don’t want my children to be paranoid adults looking over their shoulders because there is danger lurking behind every corner.
Alert and knowledgable but not scared !

[...] as it is, that remote possibility is a big part of my 15%) I was surprised how many parents voice vociferous concern about kids flying alone. ANY kids; theirs, mine, and especially [...]