Would you adopt a Haitian orphan? Do they really need us?
Before the quake, Haiti had about 380,000 children in orphanages and now the U.S. State Department is estimating there could be tens of thousands more children left without parents.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton says:
“One area we are urgently focused on is the plight of Haitian orphans,” she said of the thousands or perhaps tens of thousands of children who were left without parents after the devastating 7.0-magnitude earthquake that struck last Tuesday.
” ‘We will also be doing everything we can to unite the many children and families that have been separated in the aftermath of the earthquake and to do all that we can to expedite the travel of children who were in the line for adoption who have a legal, permanent home [or] guardianship waiting for them. We will not let red tape stand in the way of helping those in need.’ ”
“According to The New York Times, that process was already under way, as a group of 53 Haitian orphans touched down in Pittsburgh on Tuesday, the first of what is expected to be a large wave of children who will arrive in the U.S. after the country loosened its policy on visa requirements to expedite the adoption of parentless Haitian children by American families. It normally takes up to three years to adopt a child from Haiti.”
According to a Canadian Web site France will immediately take in 276 children from quake-hit Haiti who had been matched with French parents for adoption, Foreign Minister Bernard Kouchner said Wednesday.
While researching for this story I found another site from a children’s organization in Haiti saying that the situation is not as dire as the State Department is thinking and believes they will have far fewer children to place.
Here’s what SOS Children’s Villages reports on its Web site:
“Despite making a public statement discouraging people from trying to adopt earthquake orphans We have been inundated with offers from around the world from well meaning couples wanting to know how to set about adopting. Please could we make the following points very clearly:
- Despite exaggeration in the media by people who wish to make a dramatic story, the actual number of children orphaned by the earthquake is likely to be 5-10,000, based simply on the experience of other major disasters. After the tsunami reports of 1.5 m orphans from the same sources turned out to be quite false, with the final figure of about 5,400. There were similar ratios of overall fatality to number of orphans created in each country.
- There are hundreds of thousands of children in need of immediate help but most will have some traceable family somewhere. These children will need schools, homes and so on and longer term donations are needed to support them.
- Of the 5-10,000 orphans typically, with support from family strengthening programmes such as those we already run in Haiti, 80-90 % would have family whom they know in some position to care for them. This leaves perhaps 1000 newly orphaned children aged 0-18 from the earthquake the older of whom with have deep linguistic and cultural routes and would have a difficult time adapting to competitive Western schooling etc. We expect to end up with many of these older children, in the usual pattern of events. Perhaps 50 babies orphaned by the earthquake may be suitable for adoption whereas many children already orphaned were already in the process of adoption.
- The total number of fatalities from the earthquake is likely to exceed 200,000 which is 2% of the population of Haiti, with a heavy concentration in poor urban areas. The current number of orphaned and abandoned children in Haiti is about 380,000 of whom more than 2% have probably died in the disaster. There are therefore probably fewer actual orphans in Haiti as a result of this disaster, although the number is still horrific and the conditions of they and other children have deteriorated sharply.
- Children who have just been orphaned by the earthquake will not have been properly assessed with families traced etc until at least 18 months time, given the state of records and so on in Haiti.
Many thousands of couples worldwide have stated an interest in adopting an earthquake orphan. There is a huge mismatch between offer and actually need.”
I’m not sure what to make of the differential in numbers. I guess we will have a much better idea as the rescuers are able to match children up with their families. If there is a need, would you adopt an orphan from the Haitian earthquake? What would it mean to the children we already have?
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242 comments Add your comment
Cammi317
January 21st, 2010
11:42 am
I’ve been pondering that very question. It’s just me and my daughter and we have the space, I just don’t know if I have the time to make such a commitment.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
11:55 am
@Cammi as a single Mom of 2 I can tell you it is difficult. Much more so than my friends who are single parent to 1. While we realize more kids does mean more difficult, single parents do not have that partner to run interferance or to help with the other child under multiple tasks. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. It just means be very careful and prayerful.
I would take on a dozen if I could. I know I cannot — financially, emotionally, or economically. Plus I hate to admit it but I am getting older! I think the ex-BF said it best “Honey it is not that your heart doesn’t have the room for it, it your being doesn’t.” (Granted we were discussing whether we wanted to get married and have mutual children).
Yes, the children of Haiti do need just like all children. I think perhaps instead of the IVF thing, those that want to be parents (and can afford it in psychological, emotional, time, and economic terms) and aren’t should consider this option.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
12:00 pm
I literally asked Michael last night about adopting. I’m wondering if we’re being called to this. However, after reading the SOS information I’m not quite sure what to think.
Erin Wallace
January 21st, 2010
12:09 pm
i’ve wanted to adopt for years. How are these “families” of orphaned children going to care for themselves, let alone these children. I have a loving home, great marriage, and great job. We are very cabable and would love nothing more than to adopt a child and allow them to have the life they deserve! Remove some of the red tape to make it easier for us to help these children now when they really need it.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
12:16 pm
Oh and there was a story on today of a newborn who had been buried in the rubble for a week. She was found ALIVE and reunited with her Mom! Such a happy thing.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
12:17 pm
If I had the room and they money I would bring home every one of them :)
Lori
January 21st, 2010
12:19 pm
I’m surprised by the SOS stance. Their job – sole mission – is to help find adoptive homes for children. Even if they think this is over-estimated, they should encourage adoption. Plus, the numbers they’re disputing are the NEW orphans. What, the SOS doesn’t care about the “other” 380,000 orphans?
Something’s going on with the SOS and their stance. Just seems wrong and counter productive.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
12:20 pm
I don’t know what to make it of it — it struck me very odd.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
12:20 pm
FCM, did you see the lil guy that was pulled out and he raised his arms to the sky.. I bawled when I saw that one
JATL
January 21st, 2010
12:22 pm
Personally we cannot take on any more children from anywhere, but I really urge anyone wanting to adopt or have a baby who can’t to please look into this! However there are unfortunately problems for some. It’s ugly to say, but there are families who may consider this but won’t because extended (but still very important) family would not welcome a black child. One would hope that attitude would change in such dire circumstances, but it would be awful if it didn’t. I hope for most this isn’t the case and many parents and children can find loving and well-provided for homes where they’ll all have good lives.
CDD
January 21st, 2010
12:27 pm
I don’t think I’ll ever adopt a child (of course never say never,) but with 4 children under 10 yrs. old right now, I know I couldn’t do it at this point in time. Not only would adopting a child entail more of the usual kid-stuff kinda work, but a child from another country – you’d need to spend additional time to integrate him or her into a different culture. Not if they’re older anyway. My husband doesn’t even want me to adopt a dog right now because he knows that even though I’m the one who wants one and would be the one taking care of it, I really just don’t have the time or energy. I have thought about fostering a child later on after my kids are older, but I’d still need to pray a lot about that too.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
12:28 pm
@Theresa and the rest…..when you think about adopting, in your mind’s eye do you see an infant, or would you adopt an 8 year old too?
thepikey
January 21st, 2010
12:31 pm
Hello, love the blog. Just something to think about, and I know that these children need help, but there is a lot of baggage coming with these kids. Aside from the cultural and language barriers one would face, the psychological damages from living through this type of hell could be devastating. I just hope some of these families who are trying to take in these kids know what they are getting into and that these children won’t end up in the system or worse once the reality sets in.
CDD
January 21st, 2010
12:31 pm
Meant to say you would spend more time trying to get them used to American culture if they “were older.”
I know of a couple that was planning on trying to adopt two Haitian children before the earthquake happened and now it seems that the adoption has been stalled even more because of that. They do know both children made it alive. I wonder what will happen to the kids already placed with families but haven’t been able to go.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
12:34 pm
I would adopt what ever God led me to adopt :)… There is a girl at church she has 3 and the youngest lil guy is just too stinkin cute.. big brown eyes and cheeks you just want to kiss :)
Cammi317
January 21st, 2010
12:37 pm
It seems to me that SOS is more concerned with funds coming into their organization than finding homes for the orphans. @ FCM, thank you for the advice and duly noted @ thepikey, those very thoughts have been on my mind. Lots to think about.
Jill
January 21st, 2010
12:39 pm
ADOPT THESE CHILDREN! THEY NEED A GOOD HOME.
Lori
January 21st, 2010
12:45 pm
In reference to what “thepikey” posted earlier. I remember when so many people were adopting older Romanian kids awhile back. Issues started popping up where they just weren’t adapting, due to their previous lives (horrid conditions on the orphanages and all).
These kids may have emotional baggage that you need to be prepared for.
cmallen96
January 21st, 2010
12:49 pm
I understand the need to protect the children but these children need help now, not 18 months from now. I can’t believe that living in a tent or side of a road would be better than placing them with a family that can provide them security, food, warmth and love. I am not sure why the Haitian government would make it so difficult to help the children of their country. Under their requirements, most of us wouldn’t qualify as parents. Maybe the focus now shouldn’t be about adoption but rather fostering children in an emergency situation. I would be happy to take in a child right now even if it meant in 12 months time they found their parents and I had to bring them back to Haiti. At least it would mean that the child had 12 months of their basic needs being met versus an environment of choas and uncertainty.
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Lori
January 21st, 2010
12:52 pm
@cmallen96 – they HAVE to do full checks on everybody trying to adopt. Yes, there are worse things that can happen to adopted children than living in a tent. Much worse.
They have a responsibility to make sure (to the best of their ability) that this doesn’t happen.
PHR
January 21st, 2010
12:54 pm
I heard on the news that the judge that did all of the adoptions in Haiti was actually killed during or after the earthquake. Very sad!
This came up after the Tsunami and I never saw any follow up stories about all of the children that were parentless that were adopted.
Lisa
January 21st, 2010
12:54 pm
I’ve been watching the news reports since this happened and I’ve been crying myself to sleep at night with visions of all those children in my head. I would love to adopt, we have 2 children of our 17 and 12 who are very sensitive to what is going on in Haiti today and my daughter actually approached me yesterday and asked if we would consider adopting. No matter what “baggage” comes along with these children, they need our help and with a lot of love and patience it would be worth it!
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:02 pm
@cmallen96….”I am not sure why the Haitian government would make it so difficult to help the children of their country”. If you’re looking for sense and reasoning about the Haitian gov’t, just stop, it’s futile. This is a country that has gone through 32 coups in the last 200 years. Their gov’t is not what you know to be gov’t.
I admire anyone who decides to help out the orphans of Haiti…I just think you should really consider and understand the magnitude of it all. Lisa, you have a 12 year old daughter…would you adopt a 14 year old boy (haitian or otherwise)?
FCM
January 21st, 2010
1:03 pm
@ Julia…no didn’t see that. I get most of my news from online “print” sources or the radio. I seldom watch a tv broadcast because the kids notice that more than me “working” at the computer and the radio is just “noise” to them they little they hear it.
cmallen96
January 21st, 2010
1:04 pm
I agree that full checks have to be done and prepared to do so. I have contacted many organizations about starting the Home Study process, this is one of the steps that needs to be completed for fostering and adoption. This can take up to many months to complete, and none of them will start the process for Haiti. We are at a complete standstill!
Christina
January 21st, 2010
1:07 pm
Teresa, I too have been wondering if I am being called to adopt. One of the CNN images this week showed a young girl about my son’s age, sleeping on some kind of mat on the ground. Despite very obvious differences in race and gender, I saw my son in that little girl – his ears, lips, hands. Hit me to the core.
Like a previous poster said, it sounds like SOS is more concerned with money coming into their organization, than with children being released from it. I know that extensive checks need to be in place for prospective adoptive parents. I know a number of couples who either have adopted, or currently are waiting. If our agencies (in the US) can review and accept/deny couples within 6-9 months (I’m talking about from first contacting an agency until you’re approved – not including the time spent waiting for a match – because if these children are waiting now, there shouldn’t be much “waiting to match” time), what could possibly make Haitian adoptions 2-3 times as long? Beaurocracy. There’s plenty of it in our system, but it seems to be even more rampant elsewhere.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
1:08 pm
@JATL do watch Modern Family? They re-aired the pilot at 8 last night. That was the one where the couple adopted a baby girl from Asia (China?). I think more and more families are starting to accept it. They should! My children were saying they didn’t like this or that and I said um HELLO! Go look at your family tree: Latino, Jewish, African – British, same gender couples, and the beat goes on…..
Christina
January 21st, 2010
1:08 pm
Sorry – Theresa – Left out the “h”
KMM
January 21st, 2010
1:10 pm
My sister is adopted from India and I always imagined having a biological and an adopted child, just like my parents. But the costs of adopting (especially an infant) have become outrageous. I know they need to do a lot of legal checks on potential parents, homestudies, etc. and I am glad that they do. But $30k for a kid is just not possible for us. I gave some thought to adopting an older child from the foster system here in the states, but experiences of friends have made me second guess that as well.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:12 pm
Christina…if you want a partial answer to why the Haitian gov’t is so inefficient…google “tonton macoute” or “baby doc”. This will give you a little insight as to the turmoil this govt has gone through in the last 50 years.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
1:18 pm
Tiger :), should a woman of a young daughter date?? I am “just” throwing that question out… I have no stance on it either way….Just a different perspective :)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:20 pm
You’re just trying to get me to be a rabble rouser Julia! I’m not falling for it!
Christina
January 21st, 2010
1:22 pm
Thanks, Tiger. I actually studied a little Haitian history in college (minored in French), but we did not go into so much detail. I remember Duvalier’s name, but that’s about it. And it may also be that, by the time I reached that level of French, I only absorbed half of what we were learning – and spent the rest of the time trying to keep up with the vocabulary.
Lisa Taylor
January 21st, 2010
1:23 pm
I WANT TO – Where can I find information on this matter (serious information) I have plenty of room and no children – My partner and I are already doing the paper work on foster children – but I WANT TO DO THIS!!!!
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:26 pm
@christina…sorry…hope i didn’t come off as “scholarly”…we all know that isn’t the case!!! ;-) It’s really sad though, because for all Haiti could offer via tourism and the like, they could really be a wealthy, stable country.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
1:27 pm
Hey PHR — that SOS web site mentioned that the tsunami orphans were originally reported to be over 1 million and it wasn’t true at all. The actual number was 5400 — which is still a lot of children but not as much as 1 million.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:28 pm
I coached a youth league basketball team before I had a kid..one of the 12 year olds had parents who did missionary work in Haiti. This family was amazing and they absolutely loved the people of Haiti.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
1:30 pm
Tiger you love me :)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:33 pm
julia….what can I say, I have a soft spot in my heart for trouble makers!
Julia
January 21st, 2010
1:36 pm
Esp ones that laugh when doing it huh? :)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:38 pm
No…I used to really get mad at all the women who laughed at me when “doing it”…….my wife was the first one who didn’t…so I married her. :-)
oneofeach4me
January 21st, 2010
1:38 pm
I cannot watch TV, it’s just too graphic in nature to me. I do read the stories online though; I don’t want to be ignorant to what’s going on outside of my world.
That being said though, I just don’t think I could adopt. Some people are called to do this kind of thing. I personally am not. I give so much of myself to everyone around me that if I brought another kid into my situation, especially one that would need special care emotionally and psychologically I would probably have a mental breakdown. I remember when one of my friends told me when I was pregnant with my 2nd kid that going from one to two is a BIG difference. Boy was she right!!
I say if you can do it, financially, psychologically and emotionally please do. Children of 3rd world countries need help, and lots of it.
Jane
January 21st, 2010
1:42 pm
Don’t forget…the orphanages here (in the U.S., in Georgia) are bursting at the seams too. Those kids need love as well.
JATL
January 21st, 2010
1:46 pm
Hey FCM -it’s not me feeling that way! I have a good friend in this situation, and they were trying to adopt from China, and it’s almost closed at this point. Guatamala is also closed to adoption now. Her extended family made it clear that “one of those” would be ok, but not black. I do not want to adopt any children, but if I did, I would LOVE to take a Haitian orphan, but I’m in the same situation as far as extended family goes. It would cause HUGE issues, and that isn’t good for anyone. It’s hard for me to believe that people can still feel that way in 2010 about a little child no less, but it prevails.
I do watch “Modern Family” religiously! It’s one of my favorite shows!
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
1:47 pm
No this in interesting on the SOS Web site — they are looking for sponsors for children — it looks like you set up an account and then they can pull money from that account to care for a specific child — so maybe that would be an option for some families — I personally have no idea how reputable this SOS charity is so before you do anything please check out the charity thoroughly —- What’s nice about this is it’s less commitment than actually bringing a child into your home but can make a huge difference to a child there —- here’s what the site said about sponsoring a child
Sponsor an Earthquake Orphan
Haiti boy
As in previous emergencies following the 2010 Haitian earthquake we at SOS Children are appealing for emergency relief sponsors. These sponsors will help us provide safety and shelter for children short term and help with the longer term needs of any earthquake orphans. Children who have lost their families need support long after the TV cameras have gone home, and already hundreds of people have approached us to become Emergency relief sponsors.
The way that emergency relief sponsorships work is:
1. Sponsors fill in the online sponsorship form and set up a Direct Debit with “emergency relief sponsor” in the instructions field
2. Sponsors remain free to cancel at any time
3. The first twelve months of payments are used for our Haiti Emergency relief programmes including care of children whilst we trace families
4. Sponsors will receive an update on progress with rebuilding lives in Haiti
5. After the initial twelve months of payments the sponsorship changes into a sponsorship for a child or village in Haiti at which point the sponsor will get a welcome pack with details of their sponsorship/sponsored child
6. We guarantee that 100% of all sponsorship money will be sent from the UK without deduction and either used in Haiti or, for the emergency relief period, may be spent in the Dominican Republic on goods for transport to Haiti.
Before this crisis there were more than 800 child sponsorships needed in Haiti. Haiti was already very poor (with 78% of the population living on less than $2 a day), still rebuilding after the 2008 hurricane season and with 7000 people a year dying from HIV-AIDS. If you wish to sponsor one of the children already needing support pre earthquake just write “sponsor in Haiti” in the instruction box. Short term problems with administration in Santo mean we may well allocate you a child in Cap Haitien.
RM
January 21st, 2010
1:47 pm
This blog/story is simply disgusting. How dare you try to take away the importance of adoption especially at a time where it is truly need! If there is a family willing to help one of these unfortunate children I think that they should do so without these negative comments. It is difficult for anyone to adapt to a new environment but that happens with time and these children are no different. We all have cultural roots but that does not define us or make us incapable of adapting! YOU PEOPLE HAVE SOME NERVE!!! THESE ARE INNOCENT LIVES REGARDLESS OF WHAT THE ACTUAL NUMBER IS.
JJ
January 21st, 2010
1:48 pm
I thought about it, but I’ve already raised one child by myself, and at 50, I’m not really looking to start all over again. It’s JJ time now. Yes that’s selfish, but I raised a child and put her first. Now it’s time for me.
Lori
January 21st, 2010
1:52 pm
RM – what’s your issue? We’re being compassionate and realistic at the same time. How many are you adopting?
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:54 pm
@RM…the actual questions posed to answer were…
“If there is a need, would you adopt an orphan from the Haitian earthquake? What would it mean to the children we already have?”
I don’t think anyone here has implied or overtly stated that anyone should not adopt. Quite the contrary, I think for those would have given their reasons why they would not adopt have expressed nothing but respect and admiration for those who would consider it.
JATL
January 21st, 2010
1:55 pm
Ahhh -RM -I think the blog is supposed to call attention to the fact that Haitian children need adopting, but are there as many as we think? There are many REAL, legitimate issues with any type of adoption that people REALLY need to think about -especially since you’re dealing with a several people’s lives. Maybe you should read it instead of just having a spastic reaction!
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
1:56 pm
whoops…meant to say “I think for those WHO have given their reasons why they would not adopt”
oneofeach4me
January 21st, 2010
1:57 pm
RM ~ I don’t think anyone here has really made negative comments about adopting. Most comments have just been realistic in that adopting a child from ANYWHERE should be taken extremely seriously and should be throughly thought out. No one is taking away the importance of adopting, actually, Theresa is shedding light on it. The discussion is not primarily what the numbers are (that’s just a fact that is blurry) it really is about whether or not you (as an individual) would or could adpot.
Lori
January 21st, 2010
1:57 pm
I just saw this on the CNN website:
————————————–
London, England (CNN) — Three aid groups called Thursday for an immediate halt to any new adoptions of Haitian children after last week’s earthquake.
Save the Children, World Vision and a unit of the British Red Cross said the focus first must be on tracing any family members that children may still have and reuniting them.
“Any hasty new adoptions would risk permanently breaking up families, causing long-term damage to already vulnerable children, and could distract from aid efforts in Haiti,” the agencies said in a joint statement.
—————————–
Those are big groups. Sounds like people are literally grabbing children off the street and trying to orphan them out. This is bad.
The link is: http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/americas/01/21/haiti.adoptions/index.html?hpt=T1
oneofeach4me
January 21st, 2010
2:01 pm
@Lori ~ that is what worries me. Black market adoptions.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
2:04 pm
I am not sure they are just grabbing them off the street to send them some where else for adoption I hope they are talking about these children that are in all those orphanages over there….
Carolyn
January 21st, 2010
2:14 pm
I have been following the plight of the orphans since the earthquake. We have to have the Haitian and US Governments remove all the red tape around adoption in humanitarian interest and airlift these orphans out of Haiti and into the arms of all the Americans who want to open their homes to them. I am one of those families and find it disgusting the amount of red tape and time involved with the adoption process. Remember the airlifts at the end of the Vietnam War, that is what we need here. I hear those that say these children may not be orphans but there were so many orphans living in orphananges before the quake. Let’s get those kids out, what benefit is it to them by making them wait three years for a family. I would love to take in one or two of these angels and they do not need to be babies. Please if you can help me in any way email me at Jimk75@gmail.com. Thanks so much. I wish celebs like Ellen and Oprah would get involved. It disgusts me to no end how celebs squander money when they can use it with their power and status to change the lives of suffering people.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
2:20 pm
I’ve got $10 that says Brad and Angie adopt one of these kids!
Jane
January 21st, 2010
2:25 pm
You folks are getting all upset about the amount of time it takes and the amount of red tape? IT’S BEEN A WEEK PEOPLE!!
As Christina pointed out earlier – it takes 6-9 months to adopt in the U.S. and we’re fast!
Let the dust settle (literally and figuratively) before you rip these kids away from their country. It’s not like the U.S., family members there may be looking for their child inch by inch. They don’t just look at a computer screen.
It’s been a week – don’t cry about red tape. I don’t want a child molester in the U.S. getting a few kids he shouldn’t, just because you don’t want complete checks.
Debbie
January 21st, 2010
2:26 pm
A-MEN Jane!!!
Geez, Carolyn
January 21st, 2010
2:30 pm
Why do you want celebrities to lead the charge here – while I am not Oprah fan, from what I can tell she does quite a bit of philanthropy in public, and probably just as much out of the public eye. So, please tone it down a bit.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
2:34 pm
I think now I am just gonna grab a snack, sit in the corner and just watch the fur fly
Lisa
January 21st, 2010
2:38 pm
fur fly = cat fight!!!
hehehe
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
2:42 pm
for the record…this time I had nothing to do with the claws coming out. there’s a first for everything.
summer
January 21st, 2010
2:44 pm
As much as I want to help and believe me I do – I’m with Jane!!!
Julia
January 21st, 2010
2:45 pm
LOL Tiger :).. Me and you both! I am just gonna mind my own business :)
Julia
January 21st, 2010
2:47 pm
With out everyone getting there undies in a wad.. I think most of us have enough IQ points to rattle around in our head to “know” we can NOT go over there tonight and start grabbing up kids… This is just talking compassion……
HB
January 21st, 2010
2:52 pm
I think the recommendation makes sense for a lot of reasons. First, as many mentioned, you need time to check out adopting familes. Haiti seems to be trying to remove a lot of the red tape for families who were already in the process of adopting — if they were pretty far along, knew the child, and had been checked out, there’s a lot of effort going into speeding up that process.
After watching the news reports and seeing/hearing the terrible stories about what is going on there, people are feeling very emotional and have a real desire to reach out and take care of these children — understandable. But by speeding up the process too much and skipping important steps, you run the risk of making it too easy for well-meaning people to act on impulse before really understanding the challenges of raising traumatized children uprooted from their home country.
And then there’s the most important reason — orphans are not necessarily without family who can care for them. It will take time to make sure they don’t have other family members in Haiti, who at this point may not even know their relatives have died, and may want to care for the children themselves.
Of course living in a tent with no food or water would be terrible, but adoption is not the only solution to that problem. Your donation or sponsorship of a child can help provide food, shelter, and medicine during the search for a child’s family members and/or the process of placing a child with a suitable family. If you are interested in adopting, try taking a step back and separating your feelings from the disaster itself. Ask yourself if you feel as strong a desire to adopt a child from another country who may be facing hardships as great as the earthquake survivors, who you haven’t seen on the news all week. If so, do your research and start the process to either adopt a Haitian child a year or so from now when they become eligible for adoption or find a child from another country. Unfortunately, there’s no shortage of impoverished, often war-torn, countries to choose from.
ATLnative
January 21st, 2010
2:55 pm
I would adopt in a heartbeat. Cut out some of the red tape and the astronomical cost and my home is wide open.
summer
January 21st, 2010
2:57 pm
The red tape is for the safety of the child – Please keep this in mind!!!! Well put HB!!!!
Jen
January 21st, 2010
2:58 pm
We would definitely adopt one or even two. We are already in the process of adopting internationally, but, if you are at all familiar with int’l adoption, it takes a long time, sometimes years. Sad, because there are hundreds of thousands of legitimate orphans all over the world who need homes. We are one of those couples with no bio children who want to adopt. We are already approved by the US gov’t to adopt, not necessarily from Haiti, but we’ve got clearance. We’re just waiting for someone to tell us what the next step is.
Smith
January 21st, 2010
3:01 pm
A family from my church was one of the families going to Pittsburgh to pick up her now adopted daughter. It is my belief that mercy evacutions such as this are good. These were children who had no family before the quake and now in many cases cannot remain in the orphanage safely. They also are already matched with prospective parents for the most part. These are the children that need to be focused on first. Newer orphans because of the disaster need to be cared for in country so that parents or grandparents have a chance to locate them. It would be a double tragedy if they were sent to a family in the US when they still have family in Haiti searching for them. As a mother I can only imagine what it would be like to go through that.
amy
January 21st, 2010
3:12 pm
Whereas this article left me feeling hopeful for the orphans of Haiti, there are still millions more from all around the world that are desperate for parents to take them in. There are several organizations set up to aid in the process for orphaned children from China, Ukraine, Russia, and Ethiopia – just to name a few places. So even if there is much help and an exaggerated number of Haitian orphans, there are still so many that need a home and love.
Lynda
January 21st, 2010
3:13 pm
Are you all listing to yourselfs????? Im sorry that all of these kids have to go through all of this(I am a mother of 4 and have fostered up word of 200 over 15 years) but, we DO have Children right here in The US of A that NEED families and homes also. What about them? Do for our little part of the world FIRST then think about the rest.
My prayers and hopes are with all in Haiti
David
January 21st, 2010
3:18 pm
Being Involved and dealing with this kind of trama and being Adopted my self several years ago. What SOS is trying say is there is always support at this time but wait access the cituation after the recovery and rescue after the rebuilding has begun and try to raise these children with their Families in Haiti where the hurts can heal and they can build and suport the other love ones that suffered loss. Adoption is not always the answer but is an option I live my life now never knowing my Birth parents or if I had birth siblings from my Parents. Haiti can be a Beautiful place and the children of next Generation may be the ones to bring change we have to be patient and support the caring oganizations that are there laboring to bring relief to this area of disaster
Tweets that mention Would you adopt a Haitian orphan? Do they really need us? | A Blog for Busy Moms - MOMania -- Topsy.com
January 21st, 2010
3:21 pm
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Femme Brulee, HaitiFor.me. HaitiFor.me said: News Update Would you adopt a Haitian orphan? – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) http://ow.ly/16ohyc [...]
summer
January 21st, 2010
3:25 pm
I too foster children and we are adopting 3 of them! But Lynda, I believe a needy child is a needy child no matter where they are from. Yes, we chose to help with in our own community but God Bless any parent that helps a child – no matter where they were born!!!!!
Duchess
January 21st, 2010
3:40 pm
If I were stable financially I definitely would consider adopting.
mom2alex&max
January 21st, 2010
3:41 pm
In re: adopting domestically. It is my understanding that it’s extremely difficult, expensive, and that it takes forever. I know several families that chose to adopt abroad simply because it had become prohibitive here in terms of money and time.
Actually Dar is right..
January 21st, 2010
3:43 pm
@ATLnative, I’m in agreement with you on this..I don’t understand why it takes so long to adopt, a criminal background check can go thru in about 2 days (or less)..I know that prespective parents should be checked out, but come on..I had a very good friend that adopted (here) and it took them 3 years for it to go thru..The man owned his own company, was a Shriner, lifetime friends with the county Sheriff, already had a grown son that is a Preacher and the list could go on and on..BUT, they kept telling him that they had to check him out..
FCM
January 21st, 2010
3:54 pm
@ Carolyn — John Travolta has offered his services as pilot and his personal aircraft. Clooney has a telethon gig in the works and many stars are signed on to help him. There are probably other “celebs” helping too…or does that not count?
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
3:54 pm
@Actually Dar is right….I’m in agreement there has got to be a way to streamline the process, but I think that has got to be for everyone and I don’t think that anyone’s personal vita should allow them to fast track their way through. The goal should be to establish thorough, dependable, and expedient background checks for all.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
3:55 pm
Actually Dar is right.. did you forget to change your screen name, Dar has not been on this one yet :)
summer
January 21st, 2010
3:57 pm
The adoption process is long for many reasons but what has taken so much time in our 3 cases – is to make sure the child does not have a relative that is able to care for them. This really is for our protection too! You don’t want to love this child and then a family member comes out of the woodwork after you have adopted them and POOF – your family is in shambles. So although yes it does take a very long time – in my 3 cases – it is truly the best for the child and for us the parents. Patience is very important in all aspects when it comes to a child!!!!!!
FCM
January 21st, 2010
4:00 pm
World champions BRAD PITT and ANGELINA JOLIE have donated $1million to Doctors Without Borders
Rumors are, even the embattled TIGER WOODS is said to have donated money for a mobile hospital.
MATT DAMON’s OneXOne Foundation has been helping Haiti’s children since 2006 and is ramping up efforts to help during the disaster.
JEAN WYCLIFF, TOMMY HILFIGER, DREW CAREY, DAVID ARQUETTE, SHEILA E and DAVID HASSELHOFF reveal what they are doing to help the people of Haiti…
Carolyn go Google it.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
4:00 pm
Actually Dar is right.. no offense here… but I know of Mason’s and Shiners I would not trust to baby sit my cat…. These are personal experiences with these men….
Heather
January 21st, 2010
4:01 pm
I have always wanted to adopt. My husband and I have three happy, healthy children and he was not lead to do so, until the devastation that Haiti has seen. The problem with the SOS stance is that there are at least 380,000 orphans (weather new or old) in an area that has been hit by total devastation. I have made several calls to see what we need to do to begin the process if they bring children to this country that need a home. Problem is no one has been able to tell me what I need to do or who I need to contact.
I understand that bringing a child to another country isn’t going to fix the problems in Haiti; however, these are children and they need medical attention, food, water, shelter and a chance at life.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
4:04 pm
@JATL I apologize if it came across as you felt that mixed families were wrong. I never thought that. My point was that I think that view is changing drastically these days.
Dar
January 21st, 2010
4:05 pm
Cool, I am right and haven’t even said anything. And I won’t. I have no dog in this hunt. It takes all my energy to ruin the one child that I have now….I couldn’t possibly make the time to destroy another one. God Bless all of those who have room in their homes and hearts to bless a child with a family.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
4:08 pm
Heather start at a church that has missions there… Its just a thougt…
Julia
January 21st, 2010
4:09 pm
Oh come on Dar – play with us :)
DB
January 21st, 2010
4:22 pm
To answer the question: No, I wouldn’t adopt from Haiti — or probably not from anywhere else, either. We’ve given some serious thought to being short-term foster parenta for kids who find themselves caught in acute situations in an often impersonal system, and it’s something that we may do when my husband’s out-of-state project is finished later this year. However, adopting a child at this point in our lives, taking them into our family and our lives for all time — I’m just not there.
The thing that I always find fascinating when there are tragedies such as this is how many people talk about adoption of these poor, ravaged kids — as if there hadn’t been at-risk kids throughout the world before this earthquake. Is it because they have suffered a terrible experience that makes us feel like they “need” us more than kids who are stuck in orphanages and foster care throughout the world? I’m all for providing aid where it can do the most good, but let’s face it — bluntly, none of us gave a rat’s ass about Haitian children BEFORE the earthquake, except in a vague, “Oh, that’s too bad, let’s pray for them and send them some shoes and library books” sort of way, and many of them lived in the most devestating poverty known to man. I’m not saying that we should STILL continue to ignore it — but I do find it interesting how this sort of thing awakens some pretty radically protective reactions.
Teonda
January 21st, 2010
4:29 pm
My husband and I have wanted to adopt for years. We had just felt it was the right time and this happened in Haiti’s we were torn to adopt from Haiti or Hong Kong. We could offer a child a good christian home but am having a hard time getting any information.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
4:31 pm
DB you break my heart over you saying that NONE of us gave a rats ass about the children there before this. I beg to differ, I go to a VERY large church in Ga that has missions there all the time, children were being adopted. Did you not see the miracles of the orphanages down there and american families that had adopted these children before this happened and was just waiting on their VISA’s???? If you google Christian adoptions from Haiti, you get oodles of hits.. Look at this website http://newmissions.org/ these people go to churches all over the US making people aware of the needs of children there….
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
4:31 pm
@FCM….by the way…that was Tiger’s idea to donate before I even mentioned it to him…you know with me being in his PR inner circle and all! I just tried to get him to publicize his generosity more, but he thought it would appear self serving….he’s really a nice guy.
Logic
January 21st, 2010
4:40 pm
My eyes get watery every time I see the children from Haiti. I my heart so wants to adopt a child, but I don’t have the room & resources to raise the child. I know what its like to be a single parent I raised two girls one is in college and the other will leave for college in 2 1/2 yrs. Getting older is another issue, than I raised the point in my mind what about the children here in the US that need homes. My heart really wants to adopt a child from Haiti so much I had a dream about it last night. Just needed to get it off my chest thought this blog would help. So, if I am not called at this moment than I know God will use me in another way to help the Haiti children. God Bless all those that can…
Becky
January 21st, 2010
4:49 pm
I would love to adopt, since I was never blessed to have children of my own. But due to cost, time, money and other red tape, I don’t think that will happen any time soon.
I don’t think that any of us are not caring of these children, it’s just that there are so many children here that need our help. So, there isn’t any right or wrong in this (IMO).Heck, I have enough to worry about with just the kids in my family that have parents that are first class idiots..
FCM
January 21st, 2010
4:55 pm
@(our) Tiger…i was grinning thinking of you when I copied and pasted that in to my machine….I figured you had a hand in it of course ;)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
4:57 pm
@FCM….as we all know..I’m really the scoundrel here. I wanted him to do it to help his image…HE actually wanted to do it to help the haitians…..he’s a good guy…awful hubby…but a good guy in every other respect!
Connie Jenkins
January 21st, 2010
4:57 pm
I believe the culture shock to these children would be too much for them. My husband and I adopted 5 children from here and the difference in lifestyle was very hard on them even though we are a pretty normal family. I think it would be better for the children of Haiti if people here sponsored some of the orphan homes there so the children could grow up in their own environment.
Preeta
January 21st, 2010
4:58 pm
If I were in a halfway decent position financially, you BET I would, as long as the child is not HIV+, that would be too much for me. Sorry, I am just being honest. I’m a strong advocate of adoption, anyway. Why have your own, just to prove you are a “real man” or a “real woman”, when there are so mant unloved children in the world? And if anyone gave me trouble about my adopting a child of a different race, they can just take a flying leap. Children of ALL races need & deserve love & care. I must admit that I am also hurt by comments such as “being able to give a child a good Christian home”. I am a devout Hindu & I do not consider myself a woman who would be an unfit mother
Denise
January 21st, 2010
5:01 pm
Hi. Yes I would adopt an Haitan Orphan IF I had the means to. I am an adoptive mother of a now 2-year old. She is the joy and center of our lives. However her adoption fees were quite heavy.
I’m currently taking a break from my teaching,to be at
SAHM. Jane, you’ll be happy to know we got our little angel from Atlanta,Georgia.
The events of Haiti have broken my heart and to see the children who are now parentless has affected me deeply. Adoption is a great journey and a wonderful opportunity.
DB you’ve got some anger issues. Life is too precious to spend your time spitting out fire at others that you do not know. But deep inside I think you really care or you wouldn’t have joined the discussion.
Logic, you’ve got a great heart. Don’t change.
Adoption is an awesome journey.
nineteensixtyfour
January 21st, 2010
5:05 pm
i would adopt a child, any age.. but am i missing something? who do you contact to find out how ?
Peachie
January 21st, 2010
5:06 pm
JATL — how can you say what you did about people not adopting a child who is black when all the ones I’ve seen on tv adopting from Haiti have been white. I want to know where are the blacks . . . why aren’t they adopting some of these orphans. I’m sure there must be some but I’ve not seen any.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:08 pm
@Preeta…i don’t know..something about your proving someone is a “real man” comment I found quite offensive….and I don’t get offended easily! I think that having children, biological or otherwise, is an intensely personal decision, and no one has the right or privilege to question my motivations for wanting to have a child with my wife and not adopting.
by the way….I find it interesting that you singled out HIV+ as the ONE adoption deal breaker. Is there any other terminal illness (i.e. leukemia, cerebral palsy, etc.) that would make you say “no way” or is it just one with the stigma of HIV?
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:10 pm
@ Preeta…just to show I’m not picking on you, I think the “good Christian home” adoption philosophy is somewhat offensive as well.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
5:11 pm
Preeta I agree with you….as I said in my first post all children have certain basic needs. I see no reason why a non-Christian could not fit the bill. Even our resident atheists (they point out whom they are) can certainly be good parents (and I believe at least 2 of them are!). However remember as you read the posts that the USA is prodominately Christian and if you really read what the founders of the country wrote, we are based in Christian tradition…so it is common to think of that faith first.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
5:12 pm
This is a wake up call to ALL of us… We really need to drop to our knees and THANK GOD for our blessing and that we have a home with internet that we can get on here and discuss this. We are blessed by where we live and even our poorest in this country is wealthy over there….
Marla Cavanaugh
January 21st, 2010
5:12 pm
I’m a Mother of ten children, 7 of which I’ve adopted. These 7 have special needs of one kind or another. I feel I’ve been subjected to and have witnessed many different kinds of problems, so we’re up to a challenge. My husband and I were foster parents for 13 years and have had a total of 94 children during those years. We have a strong marraige and have raised 5 of our children to a successful and productive adulthood. Now that my home is half empty LOL I feel the urging to reach out to older children from places such as Haiti and the continent of Africa, or other places of great need.It is the older children many times, and the children who are disabled etc….who are often left behind.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
5:13 pm
Preeta that is about the most stupid thing I think I have ever heard in my life..
Julia
January 21st, 2010
5:15 pm
Marla thank you for all you have done in the lives of those children.. You really are a blessing.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:16 pm
@ FCM….”resident atheist”…..I DIG that title!
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:17 pm
@Julia…..since I’m “resident atheist” can I just be really appreciative in general while I’m watching sportscenter?
New Stepmom
January 21st, 2010
5:19 pm
WOW, we have two children in our family who were adopted internationally and I cannot imagine life without them. I see the point that there are children here who need homes and I agree, but the poverty and devastation across the world (not just in Haiti) is unimaginable to those of us born and raised here. This does not mean that I think no mission work whould be done here, but it is comparing apples to oranges.
One of the children in my family was adopted from India and had a birth injury leaving her right arm unusable (fortunately with therapy here she is gaining great use of this limb). In India this would have left her to most likely become a slave or a prostitute. Her brother adopted from China was found on the border to Viet Nam. Since his heritage could not be determined by the Chinese, he would have suffered a similar fate. Although American orphans have a fate I cannot imagine, I know that most are better cared for than these children would have been if left to their own devices in their home countries.
What I do not understand is why older American children are not considered for adoption. Even adopting a child that is between 2 and 3 years old would help and would not be unlike most international adoptions. It seems that some of the length of time and red tape involved with American adoptions is because we will go overseas and come home with an older child of a different race, but we only want white infant babies that come from the US. It is a juxtaposition that I do not completely understand.
I applaud anyone that adopts. We are fortunate that I became pregnant easily and shocked all of my doctors. Our first child will be biologically ours, but we would consider adoption at a later time. We were getting our ducks in a row to begin exploring the option when we realized I had conceived. I also hope that the bans on gay partners adopting become passe. A family can be whomever, it does not have to be biological and I have seen gay couples provide better homes than some straight couples and this would provide more homes for children who need it.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
5:20 pm
yea, I will let you :)… but you get my drift for that right?? we are blessed :)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:23 pm
@ Julia…I get a daily reminder of how fortunate I have it every day on the way to work seeing the sun rise on the Rockies….may not give me god, but it sure does make me like I’ve won the lottery of life.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
5:31 pm
@ Tiger well you were one of the 2 I believe are good parents. OH, and what I agreed with Preeta on was not her clauses to her adoption (ie HIV+), although I respect her right to decide for herself what she is willing to take on and what she isn’t in a child. It was her stance on the faith of the adoptive parent that I agreed too.
As to some of what you have asked, IF (and it is a big if) I were to adopt: I would consider, even prefer, and older child if I were to adopt. I would also prefer a female (since I already have an all female house) over a male. It has to do with already parenting the females and not having many male role models around for a male child to bond and learn from. I would have a harder time with a child with severe limitations (down syndrome, quadrapalegic, cancer, etc) but for me that has to do with time and money needed to raise a child with those issues. I would need a large quanity of both of those resources to raise a physically/medically challenged child.
Tara
January 21st, 2010
5:33 pm
Just a thought…
If you really, truly feel called to adopt (from Haiti or elsewhere) but think it’s financially impossible, I encourage you to research some possible financial assistance. There are grants available to adoptive couples, though most do require you to use your own resources as much as possible. My sister is a stay-at-home mom and her husband is a youth pastor and they are already raising two children, so they are by no means well off. But they are adopting a little boy. They have found many creative ways to make it financially doable.
I know it’s very expensive, but I just encourage anyone who really feels a desire to adopt not to be scared off by the cost. You just might be able to make it work. And it’s so worth it.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:42 pm
@FCM…well thanks…seriously. And I respect that to Christians, the Christian aspect (or any other faith for that matter) of that home is indelibly tied to the definition of a good home. To us non christians (and atheists!) the tone sometimes comes off as a exclusional definition of a good home. And to some, it is…and other times, we’re just being hyper sensitive. In your case…I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt! ;-)
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:48 pm
did I actually write the “word” exclusional?????? Ohhhhhhh, Good Golly Miss Molly is going to suggest I go back to grammar and spelling 101! For the record, I mean exclusionary!
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
5:58 pm
@FCM…oh and by the way..there are some real good arguments out there to suggest that while many of the founding fathers were Christians, some had a real disdain for the evolution of the Christian religion. Thomas Jefferson had some real controversial statements on this….based on the quotes alone, you would really question his faith in the first place.
Tiger needs me on his PR team
January 21st, 2010
6:10 pm
“Question with boldness even the existence of God; because if there be one, he must more approve the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear.” – Thomas Jefferson in a letter to his nephew.
“Jefferson believed in the existence of a Supreme Being who was the creator and sustainer of the universe and the ultimate ground of being, but this was not the triune deity of orthodox Christianity. He also rejected the idea of the divinity of Christ, but as he writes to William Short on October 31, 1819, he was convinced that the fragmentary teachings of Jesus constituted the ‘outlines of a system of the most sublime morality which has ever fallen from the lips of man’” — http://www.monticello.org
Correct me if I’m wrong, but the acceptance of Jesus as the Son of God and Saviour is pretty much THE requirement to be a Christian. If that presumption is true…then Thomas Jefferson, our most important founding father, was not, in fact, a Christian.
But alas…I digress from the Haiti adoption topic….I apologize. ;-)
Julia
January 21st, 2010
6:14 pm
Was he not a Mason?
deidre_NC
January 21st, 2010
6:24 pm
if i had the money and the time to commit i would definately be looking into this. my kids are grown (mostly) and i would not mind adopting an older child….they are the ones who will fall trhough the cracks…it makes me sad…i just dont have the time or money to devote to this. i think an older child would bring some difficulties that would require more time devoted….not that a baby wouldnt, but id assume an older child would have some issues stemming from their way of life-the poverty and illnes they have seen and now this devasting earthquake…its all too sad….i have a friend who is over there ..he actually arrived when that 2nd earthquake hit and no one hs heard from in in a while..we are very worried..so those of you who pray please do so!
Susan Toben
January 21st, 2010
6:27 pm
Yes, my husband and I would be very interested in helping foster or adopt an orphan from Haiti. I have to admit that the info I just read makes the possibility seem remote. Maybe we just need to give it time. Maybe we all just need a “plug in” to the organizations actually handling the orphans that have just arrived in order to better assess the situation.
Guerline
January 21st, 2010
6:31 pm
To all out there, government officials, adoption agencies, churches, etc.
We have to proceed with caution on the adoption of the Haitian children. Many of us (Haitians) would rather that these children were raised in our culture. I know those non-Haitian families mean well for wanting to adopt those Haitian children and I am grateful. However, do not forget that many of those children may have extended families overseas who would want them and are not even aware that they are alive, like the 36-year-old woman who is looking for her juvenile brother and sister. Do not scatter our children like they are live stocks. We may be a poor nation, but we are proud people with great sense of family awareness and values. In amidst of our sorrow, it would even be more painful to watch the future (the children) of our people get dispersed all over the globe without our consent. I see that the media reports all those foreign families rushing to get to those children and some reunited. I do not, however, see any coverage on thousands of Haitian families who would be elated to take them, I am one of them. Those children need families who can relate to what they have been through. We need to mourn together. Haiti is flat on the ground. For many of us, those children may be our way of hanging on to what is left of Haiti. They will be our strength to rebuild. I think we (Haitian families) should be given the first chance before the non-Haitian families. We need those children and those children need us. There are rich people out there who are well connected and are successfully rushing to take those kids. If I were rich too, I would adopt all of them. Give us a chance first.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
6:47 pm
Guerline I can see what you are saying but if these children are in orphanages with no one claiming them.. shouldn’t a family that would love them to pieces adopt them?
Corinne O'Brien
January 21st, 2010
7:23 pm
Absolutely, I would adopt as long as it was a female. I have 4 adopted sons ages 5 to 14 and I love them dearly but still long for a daughter.
Dear God, if it is your will, please send one to us.
Angela Townsend
January 21st, 2010
7:26 pm
I would like to adopt one
JATL
January 21st, 2010
7:32 pm
@Peachie -you must not have read my actual posts very well. I was citing two personal examples of people’s extended families who would have issues and act ugly if they adopted a black child. It’s an ugly truth, but it is, unfortunately, the truth in many white families, and I’m sure other ethnicities regarding different races and ethnicities of their own. Prejudice isn’t pretty, but it exists. As for why blacks aren’t adopting Haitian orphans -I don’t know that they’re not. I do know that statistically African-American people adopt less than whites, but as far as this situation -I don’t think we’ve gone far enough into it to know who will adopt or what will happen.
laurie ballard
January 21st, 2010
7:33 pm
I would love to adopt an orphan from Hatia, I am an empty nester with 4 bedrooms in a beautiful neighborhood. I have alot of love to give. Laurie
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
7:58 pm
Look at the photo of this baby in the orphanage — holy cow — it breaks my heart . I would be holding that baby. I would two or three at once. I hug them and love them and rub their back and rock them and sing to them. Breaks my heart!!! Never want babies or any children to feel alone. So sad.
http://www.csmonitor.com/World/Haiti-Earthquake-Diary/2010/0121/Haiti-earthquake-diary-Orphans-and-a-sense-of-community
JATL
January 21st, 2010
8:05 pm
I think Theresa hits on a good point in the last post -whatever happens with tracking possible family members of these kids, adopting them out, having them fostered or sponsored -they REALLY need some people right now who can hold them and be sweet to them. People who are concentrated solely on the kid’s well-being and not enmeshed in the nightmare that is Haiti. I sincerely hope while they’re sorting all of these children out, so to speak, that these relief organizations set up tent camps and take volunteers who are willing to go there and hold and feed babies and children. Thinking of children and babies alone, crying and hopeless is like an ice pick into the heart.
lulu
January 21st, 2010
8:14 pm
I think one idea would to be to start a list of names of folks (like me) who would be interested in adopting when the time comes. Since the process moves so slowly they could at least let us start the process so that once they determine who the orphans are i.e. after they try to find any remaining family members, folks would be ready to adopt.
I’ve always wanted to adopt. As a person of color I knew I would adopt a child of color but I always wanted to adopt a child born in the US b’c I felt that that was where the need really was. After seeing the heartbreak in Haiti I am open to adopting ANY child who needs a home. It is been a very powerful life-changing experience for me. It has opened my heart so much.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
8:21 pm
I know soooo many white people here that have adopted black babies its normal here and we treat them as the color of their skin does not matter. I think the awesome thing is that people can over come a color and love a child even if he is purple. I am sorry but I am as white as the virgin snow but I tell you if I were in the position to adopt a child from there or even here that is black, I am going to LOVE that child because that is what a mother does…
Julia
January 21st, 2010
8:22 pm
@Peachie go watch the Blind Side
lulu
January 21st, 2010
8:32 pm
Julia, good point. Also, people forget that bi-racial people (like me) are raised by parents of a different race. I was raised by my white mother. My dad was black but they split up before I was born. People who claim that it will be an issue for these kids to be raised by their white adoptive parents are rather ignorant. A parents love knows no color.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
January 21st, 2010
8:41 pm
I think we need a list of moms willing to go and hold the babies!!! I’m trying to figure out if Michael could take off from work for me to go to Haiti to hold babies!!!
Julia
January 21st, 2010
8:46 pm
Lulu, my dad was full blooded cherokee, my mom was italian and irish.. I am mixed… in the summer I get black as all get out.. My best friend is very light skinned, her husband is as white as a piece of paper and their boy way too stinkin cute.
At church sat afternoon, there was a young mama that had adopted 3 kids from Haiti.. He was so cute and such a little lover… Biggest flirt and the cutest cheeks.. I wanted to just eat him up :)
Theresa, lets go.. I would love to just hold those babies
Diana Fischer
January 21st, 2010
8:50 pm
I would be willing to adopt a child from Haiti. My own children are grown up and I have many good years to offer an orphan. My husband is Half Jamaican, and an MD and has never had children before. We both Speak French and have travelled the world. We have a large house, and the income necessary to bring a child into our home. I have young grandchildren for the child to play with and can offer a loving home and a good education to any child.
We are older, 53 and 57, but that does not mean we have one foot in the grave. We are the same as were years ago. The option for many of these children will to be in an orphanage until they are 18, or go to a home with older parents and receive love and care and be made to feel special and have all the opportunities any child could ever need. For a small child who does not know distant relatives, who will not be able to offer them much, it is better in my mind that they have a family all of their own where the parents are focused on them, and their happiness, not just giving them enough food to live.
Julia
January 21st, 2010
8:56 pm
(((Diana)))
FCM
January 21st, 2010
9:02 pm
@ Tiger “some had a real disdain for the evolution of the Christian religion.” ever hear of Barton Stone or Alexander Campbell? They came about much later than our founding fathers, and had a disdain for the evolution of Christianity too. They felt called to lead the flock back to the teachings of Jesus (though we accept the teaching of Paul too) and said ANYONE can read and figure out what the scriptures mean for themselves. That it is the baptism (public acceptance of Jesus) and communion (the renewing of the covenant) that is important. I ask because they began a church that became Christian Church (Disciple of Christ). Alexander Campbell’s home is still around as is one of the early churches in Bethany, WV. I mention this because you will see when faith comes up I often butt heads against fundamentalists (especially Southern Baptists or followers of Andy Stanley). I was raised Disciple of Christ. I was educated in Episcopalian schools, married a Catholic (and dated others prior). I have attended Epsicopalian, Catholic, Lutheran, and Baptist services with regularity at some point in my life (meaning a year or more). Before my children were born I came up with my “core beliefs” on God. When my children were born I took a hard look at which “religion” I felt most aligned with those core beliefs so that I could associate on a regular basis with folks who would teach my kids. I realized it was the Christian Church (Disciple of Christ) so I went back “home” to the church I grew up in. There is nothing “wrong” with ANY of the sections of Christianity that I have personal dealings with…its just that their evolutions (to my mind) fell astray.
I went through that lengthy explanation to point out…that I sort “get” where the founders were coming from BUT if you read their personal works, you find the core beliefs of God, Jesus, Man are still there. Thus I stand by what I stated.
Now this falls into more than you probably wanted to hear on my thoughts of the Jefferson or Christian subject:
As to Thomas Jefferson (amazing person from everything I have read!) like many great thinkers/intellectuals (and he read most of them) he questioned his beliefs. To me that seems right/normal progression…he grew up believing in “x” the way he was taught. Then at some point, he said “HEY!” and began to think, question, test, theorize, read, etc (Jesus did this in temple at the age of 12) and came up with his “core” too. I don’t see that he was wishy washy I see it as a period of spiritual refinement (like silver in fire). CS Lewis and JRR Tolkein famously questioned theirs and then wrote on what they decided — Lion, Witch, and Wardrobe and Lord of the Rings of course!
I appreciate your giving me the benefit of the doubt. I can respect your opinions. Just be open to me discussing (like above) why I believe what I do from time to time…I will do the same for you…all without judgement and without any agenda to “convert” you. Actually I like the way you present things to discuss (like Jefferson).
Certainly I will agree with you that there are those (and they may be on this blog even) who are Christians (by their admission) who do not feel the same as I. They think they are supposed to “save” people. Their actions and words are often more exclusionary, censorious, and judgmental. I too feel like they believe that their “version” of Christianity is the only way to have a “good home.” I just don’t think they are right.
BTW One of my mentors says that atheists still have a relationship with God. It is just not the one that he (my mentor) would want. ;)
FCM
January 21st, 2010
9:14 pm
“but the acceptance of Jesus as the Son of God and Saviour is pretty much THE requirement to be a Christian.” I will concede that point…but I do wish I could sit with you and talk about my personal take of my study of the Bible and what God really is after etc. I am not willing to derail the whole blog for that though. :)
I will point out that the inner most workings of Jefferson’s heart (including his acceptance in part, or whole, and how much of that “counts” with God)are not something we can know for sure. No matter what Jefferson wrote, the real crux of his relationship with God–like that of each us of — can only be known between the individual and God.
FCM
January 21st, 2010
9:41 pm
“but I do wish I could sit with you and talk about my personal take of my study of the Bible and what God really is after etc” as an open discussion so I could hear what you think of it …again not so I can try and change your mind. I love open discussion and debate…guess that is why I love the blogs.
N Payne
January 21st, 2010
9:45 pm
If I had the resources right now I would adopt a few Haitian orphans with out thinking twice. I’m currently unemployed but as soon as I’m stable again I will keep my promise. I will be continuing to send what I can because EVERYONE in Haiti needs HELP NOW!!!
Christina
January 21st, 2010
10:27 pm
I’m with Theresa. That baby just needs to be held and reassured that there is something better out there . . . we don’t need to take the babies away. Just hold them.
Guerline
January 21st, 2010
10:38 pm
You see. That is one of the reasons I said to let Haitians take care of their own first. People can help. But let those children go to people who can bond culturally with them. We just lost 200,000 people and counting. We do not have time for prejudices and labeling. People are talking about “black babies.” Why do they have be referred to be “black babies?” Why can’t they be just “babies?” I hope to God that they will not be treated as “black babies.” I know prejudice and racism are ugly. That is why educated and intelligent people should not put too much emphasis on them. We do not want to empower these words. Thanks to the person who commented on that. I was not even thinking about that. Now I have a reason to be tracking, watching and observing closely the white families since the person mention that there might be racial issue adopting “black babies”. I am offended. Get a grip, will you? This is the 21st century. Stop empowering racism.
Irene
January 21st, 2010
10:43 pm
If I could afford to adopt a few Haitian orphans I would. There is always enough love to go around and this is a tragedy like no one has ever seen before in our lifetime. I am a Grandmother and wish I was on a plane and on my way to help those little Angels.
Guerline
January 21st, 2010
10:45 pm
…and Julia, you are NOT as white as a virgin snow. No human being is. You skin is pinkish. The term “white” is just a racial label, just as the term “black” is a racial label. The last time I checked, my skin reflected a chocolate complexion, not black. No one is.
BlondeHoney
January 21st, 2010
11:13 pm
Hmmm…let me say right up front that I have considered adopting even before the catastrophe in Haiti, and even more so now. I’m divorced, my 2 boys are happy successful productive members of society, and even thought it would be a challenge with my career I am pursuing adoption. Not to stir the pot, but I really wonder if all of you who say ‘I can’t adopt because…” are also right-to-lifers. Walk the talk people. Ok I am ready for your Christian slamming. Tiger, I m with you 100%. Guerline, I am also with you 100%; I grew up in Miami close to Little Haiti and have many Haitian Americans that I am proud to call friends.
Guerline
January 21st, 2010
11:42 pm
Thank you BlondeHoney and I say bravo to you for being a progressive person and parent. You started your adoption long before this and I support you for pursuing that. I am saying those children who just lost their parents or presume to have lost their parents should be matched with relatives or Haitian families. These are children who do not know anything about racism where they are from. Do not let them start that way by wheeling prejudice’s big, head into their lives. Please! I have two beautiful children and I try to shield them from this ugly beast everyday until they are educated and mature enough to wrestle with it.
DB
January 21st, 2010
11:49 pm
@Julia: I don’t live under a rock, hon, and feel like I have a pretty good handle on the realities so many children and adults around the world have to face on a day to day basis that would make most of us faint. I’ve worked closely with missions helping orphanages in Russia and Romania. I may have stated it bluntly, but I still think it’s true that, except for the occasional ad from Save the Children showing sad-eyed kids, the vast majority of people were pretty focused on their own lives, and not on the plight of children in Haiti — or anywhere else, for that matter. If you had asked most people, they’d give it a sincere nod, but then come back with, “But there are so many AMERICAN kids that also need help . . .”
@Denise: I’m a little shocked that you think I have anger issues, but apparently I did not express myself clearly enough. Being bemused by a sudden outpouring of “Give me a Haitian child to adopt!” doesn’t make me angry — it just makes me bemused. If I were a social worker that needed to evaluate families to determine their capacity for adoption, I would think it would be prudent to take time to make sure that the initial rush to adopt wasn’t just a misplaced, but laudable, desire to *do* something that might fade when reality hit. These kids aren’t puppies to be gifted at Christmas, and ignored by Easter. Adopting a child and opening your heart, your family and your home to them is a beautiful thing — but it IS a profound change for them as much as it is for your family, just like the natural birth of a brother or sister changes the dynamics of a family. It needs careful consideration.
Mizzmo
January 22nd, 2010
12:00 am
Yes I would I have really been thinking about it and I really want to help, I would rather have a smaller baby!
Jennifer
January 22nd, 2010
12:10 am
I would absolutely adopt a child this very second if I could. I would do anything to help those kids and the people here who want to adopt them and wanted to before this happened. These children need families, they need to be taken out Haiti and given the chance to live in a loving home. All of those who were orphans already or are now as a result of this horrible earthquake. My husband and I would not hesitate to take another child into our home. I have started a cause on facebook called “Children who need love” in an effort to move forward and help those who want to adopt do so and raise awareness on the who situation. I pray for those people over there and those who have survived as they are a true example of courage.
Jennifer
January 22nd, 2010
12:11 am
I wouldn’t mind an infant or an older child.
Jatana
January 22nd, 2010
12:36 am
If had the funds available to adopt a child from haiti i would. It is so sad that they have to go through this and not have no family there makes it worse. Just to be able to give a child a family and the love it deserves would be a wonderful thing. They desveve to have someone care for them no matter what.
Dayna
January 22nd, 2010
12:57 am
Please dont forget about the live telethon tomorrow for Help The Haitians Now…Please Donate what you can even if its a dollar every bit helps!! Those kids & adults need our support!!!
Dayna
January 22nd, 2010
12:59 am
And i would like to adopt one of the orphans or become a foster parent. Anyone has any info on how to do so, please let me know.
Guerline
January 22nd, 2010
1:05 am
Jatana, Jennifer, Mizzmo, BlondeHoney,
Your support and concerns are very comforting to me as I mourn the death of my close relatives and the rest of the 200,000 dead. We understand that time is hard. However, you can help in other ways including donations of used clothing, toys, children furniture, school supplies,etc. for those of you who have children. Bring those stuff to the salvation army and churches in the names of Haitian children. Those of us who will take them in are going to need all the help we can get. We are not rich, but they are our own and we love them. Your guys efforts and concerns will go down history. Thanks a million.
Donna Sierocinski
January 22nd, 2010
1:16 am
With being a foster parent and just adopted two beautiful girls in Nov. We absolutely would have a child come to live with us. I agree with someone that wrote bring them here even to foster for now the need is NOW RIGHT NOW not a year, months, weeks or days with the urgency these children need to be safe and in the arms of someone that will rock, hug, and give them love not even to mention the daily living items, food, shelter, clothes I just watched on CNN about a 5 yr old that has no one laying there with broken leg, nothing not even clothes, and no one to hug him, feed him and wipe his tears. This is a wake up call God wants us to act and take care of each other no matter where you live, who you are or what you have done WE NEED EACH OTHER AND GOD!! So send a child our way we have open arms and much love to share
Deanna Humphrey
January 22nd, 2010
1:24 am
We are a family of 4 our daughter is 10 our son is 19 we have a 5 bedroom house and lot of love to give…we feel so positive about this. The children need us. We would love to adopt a child from Haiti.
Guerline
January 22nd, 2010
1:30 am
Donna and Deanna,
Gob bless you and on behalf of the Families: Thank you.
Ashley Shoemaker Laing
January 22nd, 2010
1:43 am
the second i herd about the devistation that hit Haiti, I jumped on line looking and looking for information on how to bring an orphaned child home. Im 26, my husband is 32 we both have good jobs and can not have a child. The last 3 years i have looked and looked on information about adoping a child the least time taking about 3 years!! to someone that so badly wants a child 3 years seems like forever and i keep putting it off making that length of time now DOUBLE!! I would take a child 0-what ever age if it ment bringing him or her here with great health care (ontario canada) and a life they could truly be greatfull for. After reading the blog above i find that information a little hard to beleive and wonder what the motive is behind it. with that being said with the millions of families wanting to adopt a child from haiti quaqe i am sure there can’t be a child for each and every one of them. speciallyif many are siblings, i think that it would be important to try to keep them together!!
nineteensixtyfour
January 22nd, 2010
2:00 am
http://www.adoptions.state.gov/country/haiti.html#who1
kerline Chery
January 22nd, 2010
2:13 am
I grow up in haiti…I am married with two wonderful children. I am from a big family and would love to add a few more children to my family without having 5 c sections. Beside it would mean the world to me to be able to make a difference in the lide of so many unfortunate littel children. if only they could make easier to adopt, I would love to have a little girl and a little boy.
JATL
January 22nd, 2010
7:18 am
Guerline -I think you’re the one who needs to get a grip. Evidently you have ties to the tragedy, so I’ll cut you some slack, but you if you think NOT talking about racism and pretending it doesn’t exist will make it go away -you have your head in the sand!
Wayne
January 22nd, 2010
7:21 am
My thoughts: my wife and I are in the process of adopting a little boy (3 yo, African-American and Hispanic). Folks speak about how expensive it is to adopt, but it hasn’t cost us anything but our time. We are going through the Department of Children and Families. We did have to attend mandatory training and create a home study. The training was interesting as they talk to you about all the bad ’stuff’ that comes along with adopting a child through DCF. J was not quite 2 when we got him and we’re waiting for the court date to make it official. Very soon.
My wife, bio-son and I are caucasian. I’ve noticed certain instances where there were some issues with race. Most people are cool about it. It is something that we have to be aware of though, and the DCF training does go into it some. Someone asked about why blacks don’t adopt; well, I asked that question of some of my African-American friends. The answer was that they don’t believe in adoption. They will take kids in, but not adopt. You probably have heard where a child moves in with Grandma and that’s where s/he will stay until they move out.
As for DCF, and I would assume the Haitian government, the goal for most kids is reunification with family. It’s much easier (and considered better) for the child if they can be with family. Might not be the best solution, but being with family as opposed to some ’stranger’ is considered a better option for the long run.
We’ve chosen the open adoption route so that J can remain in contact with his brother and sister, and his bio-mom. We’ve got a strong agreement whereby if something goes wrong though, we’re in control. Harsh, but it’s in the best interest of J so that he doesn’t have to be exposed to anything bad.
Sandy
January 22nd, 2010
7:36 am
FCM – This country WAS NOT founded upon Christian foundations. Many of the “original fathers” were God believing people, but were NOT Christians. This is a fact, look it up!
Wayne
January 22nd, 2010
8:59 am
Where’d everybody go?
Miriam Vigo
January 22nd, 2010
9:11 am
My name is MrsVigo and I would like to adopt a Haiti’s child. I have a home with an emty room and a son who soon will be 18yr old. That will leave my husband and I by our selves. How can I proceed to adopt a Haitis child???
FCM
January 22nd, 2010
9:37 am
Depends on your definition of Christian…while Disciples maintain you need a blief/acceptance of Jesus…the definition of Christian (to a Disciple–which I told you all I was)is much more loosely translated than it is in other parts of Christianity. Sort of like this:
Jesus never told anyone to believe in Jesus, he pointed the way to God and said follow me….therefore it really doesn’t matter if you believe Jesus is the Incarnate. You just need to believe what he taught and to follow to be a Chrisitian. Therefore, if YOU read up on the forefathers (who believed in God as you stated)and read the principles they founded the country on you find that yes, they did meaningly or not found this country under the premise that all men are created equal and endowed by their Creator with certain unenaliable rights…which are Jesus reinforced principles. Not to mention many of them were active in their various faith organizations (Puritian, Quaker, etc) although a few were Agnostic.
Helen Richmond
January 22nd, 2010
9:45 am
We have a radio programme called World Have Your Say. We would like to speak to people who would like to adopt a child from Haiti. please, leave us a message on http://www.worldhaveyoursay.com
Tara
January 22nd, 2010
10:25 am
Making a decision such as this requires deep fore-thought and serious consideration of the long term responsibilties. Having said that, my husband and I feel strongly that we are mentally and emotionally prepared to adopt a beautiful Haitian child into our loving and stable family. But what are the odds of that actually happening?
Wayne
January 22nd, 2010
10:32 am
This isn’t on topic, but it’s something important. One of the posts mentioned going to a site and entering information so that the site could take money out of your account to help those in need. I say, don’t do that. I’ve spoken to banking folks who tell me that you should never do that for anything. You should control it from YOUR account. Send money out via your checking account. That way, you a) can stop it at anytime, and b) don’t have to give out your account information. It’s not to say you don’t want to help, or it’s not a trustworthy cause – it’s just being prudent.
Jamie
January 22nd, 2010
10:52 am
My husband and I want to adopt NOW! Can anyone help me? I have had so many dead-ends lately. I need information!
Adoptive mom
January 22nd, 2010
10:56 am
Our three kids are all adopted. The girls were older, 17 and 12 (they are now 27 and 24). Our son was a baby(he is now 12) but his birth mom had habits which aren’t good for babies. Many of you have mentioned “baggage” Haitian orphans will bring to a family. That is a very good point. It is important to carefully consider what supports exist in your life to help you deal with the problems which arise. If you adopt children from any country, at any age, from any circumstances, there will be problems. There’s not space here to detail the kinds of problems we have experienced. Things completely outside my life experience and worse than I could ever have imagined in my darkest nightmare. Having said that, you may think I wish we had not taken in these kids, and would never take in more. You would be wrong. Regardless of the choices my kids have made, and the pain it has caused me, I love them and I would do it over again. We gave them a chance at a normal life that they would not have had otherwise. I don’t know if we will adopt one of these Haitian orphans, but we are open to the possibility. It’s too early and things are too chaotic over there right now but once order is restored and some organization begins to fall into place, we’ll definitely be looking into it.
Wayne
January 22nd, 2010
11:18 am
Jamie: Massachusetts has a resource called MARE. It’s Mass. Adoption Resource Exchange. It’s quite the thing. They have a website and a book that they put out to all the local libraries of kids that are up for fostering or adoption. I’d contact your local library and see if they have something similiar. Or, contact your state department of youth services. That is if you’re looking to adopt locally. If not, then I couldn’t give you any advice.
Be aware though, that it is not an overnight sort of thing. We’ve had J for over a year and we still don’t have our date yet. We also had to attend mandatory training in order to adopt.
Gail Pacious
January 22nd, 2010
11:31 am
What’s going on in Haiti is an unimaginable tragedy…I would hope that if something like that ever happened to my family that someone would react quickly to take my child. My husband and I have the space and are willing to help a Haitian child on either a temporary or permanent basis….who can look away from such misery?….
jbaldoni79
January 22nd, 2010
12:10 pm
My husband and I would love to adopt one or even two babies from this grief-sticken country. If anyone knows how to start the process, I’d be very thankful for the information.
denise
January 22nd, 2010
12:55 pm
Yes I would be happy to adopt.
Tangerine
January 22nd, 2010
2:48 pm
Of course, the American orphans concern me as well, but I know of none that aren’t getting nutritous meals and warm beds (I myself was orphaned at 10 years old and not permanantly adopted until 14). These children in Haiti are sleeping out of doors, exposed to the elements, barely getting food and water…God forbid disease starts running rampant, even though experience tells us it will if their conditions don’t improve immediately.
I am an advocate for getting these kids out of the horrific conditions they are living in now, and giving them a safe, supportive environment where they can live “until the dust settles.” These organizations are saying we need to immediately stop the adoptions…Is that the only option? Aren’t there lots of people (like me) who would consider giving a temporary (permanant if it turned into that) home to a child who is sleeping in the dirt? Do these babies & children need to live in squalor while it is determined whether or not they have surviving families? Yes, red tape is for everyone’s protection…but am I really hearing that there isn’t a way to streamline the process?
Haiti: Save the Children « Malandrix’s Blog
January 22nd, 2010
3:27 pm
[...] January 22, 2010 in Personal El tema de Haití me sigue pegando un mundo… no solo porque es un país muy pobre, sino que quedaron miles y miles de niños huérfanos. “One area we are urgently focused on is the plight of Haitian orphans,” she said of the thousands or perhaps tens of thousands of children who were left without parents after the devastating 7.0-magnitude earthquake that struck last Tuesday.” – Hillary Clinton [...]
Erin
January 22nd, 2010
4:02 pm
There are many orphans elsewhere, where the orphanages have the time and resources to assure a well planned, smooth adoption.
There are children who were already in the orphanages in Haiti, and would already have had time put into looking for relatives, already given some help to adjust and might be prepared to go somewhere – but most volunteering are volunteering for “earthquake babies”. Of course, even for those it’s asking a group that is extremely overburdened to vet people overseas – many of whom just want one of the disaster babies because of the media attention, and may not check out, follow through, or take a child that was an orphan before. (Sad, and not every potential parent would be in this category, but it is a LOT to weed out).
The children need immediate care. It only makes sense that the orphanages would prefer to expedite arrangements that were already mostly checked out, then concentrate on providing for the children and finding which ones might already have homes before weeding through further processes. I can’t imagine them having the time to put into vetting Jane Doe #408 for Susy while they are trying to get basic care, shelter, and food to every other child in a place that is so devastated, without any infrastructure to help them, without the resources they may usually use to do such checks, while every other system is focused on more immediate situations. Besides, by the time they know which are available to adopt, many of the volunteers will have moved on – due to either the normal adoption process complications, or the media moving on. In addition to looking for family, the new orphans will also need time and help (at least for anyone older than an infant) to prepare to go to a new place, a new culture, mourn their losses, understand what happened… While they do need to be cared for, and hopefully aren’t homeless forever, I can’t imagine speeding a young child off to another country just after their entire world imploded and their family died, without hardly a breath, would exactly help their adjustment. They’d have a billion questions, wouldn’t have accepted their family’s deaths, wouldn’t know what’s going on… I can’t imagine being anything but furious myself, and I doubt my imagination compares with the reality.
If I were looking to adopt, I think it might be more practical to consider adopting from someplace with many children that still has the resources to process the adoption at the moment (those children are just as lacking families – possibly more so if more distant relatives turn up for the Haitians), and donate to Haiti in order to provide for children so that hopefully many will find relatives and homes, which may already be waiting.
Marisol Nieto
January 22nd, 2010
4:42 pm
I can’t have children and would love to adopt a child. A baby is not necessary, I would love to have a 11 year old girl so she can be a sister to my 11 year old foster (nice) child. Do I need to have money to adopt? Money wise I do not have to give to an agency but I have alot of Love to give. If there is a brother or sister family I could maybe take them. What can I do? My husband and I are willing to share our love to those children. What can we do? Do we need to have a big home and money?
Just a Thought
January 22nd, 2010
6:09 pm
Why rip these children from their culture? Unless you are an immigrant with no family, you never will understand it, but life can be happy event in a tent. If you want to help children, send donations and money. Believe me, ripping them from their lifestyle and placing them in totally different environment is not helping them. They will suffer emotionally for the rest of their lives. Imagine if someone would come, take your child and move them to 3rd world country claiming that here kids have too many material things? How would they deal with it?
Kids in Haiti lived like this all their lives, so living in tents is a normal and natural thing for them. It is up to their norm and they do not need a separate bedroom, TVs, video games to be happy. Obviously, it is a disaster zone. You want to help, them send donations, but do not rip kids from their birth country!
Darcy Karouzos
January 22nd, 2010
6:12 pm
We have been trying to adopt domesically for the past 2 years so of course we would love to adopt an orphan from Haiti. I just wish it was easier! We even have a nursery all ready, but we could change it to help an older child. We have so much love to offer and good jobs and a heart for God!
Just a Thought
January 22nd, 2010
6:17 pm
@ Tangerine – remember, Haiti is a disaster zone. It is like a war – people will die and will get sick. How long did it take to clean up after 911? And it was only 2 buildings.
I strongly believe that people are wanting to adopt because of media attention. Most of them just wanting to do good in this emotional hour, but they do not realize what is to raise an adoptive child. It is a permanent decision and it should be made with time. You do not marry the first person off the street. Same with adoption, especially with older children – you need time and assurance of some sort of compatibility.
nessa
January 22nd, 2010
6:30 pm
i just finished looking all this info up on google because i have an aunt who is very interested in this specific topic. she is currently a teacher at a school in new jersey who cant have kids. as soon as i shared the idea with her she fell in love with it but would want more info on the requirements for the process. can someone please help me find a direct phone number or e-mail address in which i can find more information. or if anyone knows any other info about this feel free to e-mail me at vanessa_crdns@yahoo.com thanks =]
Guerline
January 22nd, 2010
6:43 pm
To JATL, I do not think I ever said that racism does not exist. I did say to that in the face of this tragedy, we do not need to get into a discussion on racism; stop empowering it. That is not the type of start that those children should have in the United states. I am grieving, yes; but you do not have to “cut me any slack”. I am perfectly capable of carrying a constructive conversation on racism. For the sake of these children: NOT NOW. Anyone who got their heads stuck in racism’s wear end, just do not adopt. If people have hate in their hearts, they do not need to be with these children anyway. There are more enlightened people out there who understand the rapport that exists between melanin and skin. I know there is racism in America. I experience every day. In fact, I am experiencing it right now by having to talk about it with you or anyone who feel that the so-called whites should not adopt the so-called black babies. I am just saying to put a hold on it, will you? When we can breath a little from this tragedy, it can go back to business as usual because some people will never change.
Guerline
January 22nd, 2010
6:53 pm
Just a thought, I agree with you 100%. That is why I said that people can help in other ways. They can, maybe, provide temporary homes, until these children can be placed with Haitian families, who are culturally and emotionally more equipped to support these children. Who knows? Maybe during those temporary placements, foster parents may bond perfectly with them and be able to adopt.
Nancy
January 22nd, 2010
6:59 pm
As the mother of an adopted child from Latin America, I would adopt a Haitian orphan in a minute. If you are a loving person, bonding is instant. An orphanage is no environment for a child to thrive in. A environment where a child is loved is a lot better than a struggling institution.
Tina Lussier
January 22nd, 2010
8:40 pm
I would be so grateful for the opportunity and privilege of raising another child. I’ve raised 3 already, but life isn’t as great as it could be without children in it.
I would definitely adopt a Haitian child. I’d love to run a home for 15 of them, so that they all have eacho other for moral support and a sense of home.. I intend to look into that. I think more people should
God Bless
jaime
January 22nd, 2010
8:42 pm
We would like to help out, we do not mind if we adopt a child, or just house a child for as long as needed, until the family can care for the child. Also we would love any age, a child is a child, and my children would be very happy if we could help. The Ross Family
Cyndi W.
January 22nd, 2010
8:43 pm
Yes, without a second thought. If my children were in the same situation my only prayer would be that a loving family would be there to care for them. We have 2 children but room in our home and hearts for more, especially considering the circumstances.
Linda
January 22nd, 2010
8:51 pm
I’m 60 years old with five grandkids and I would take a child in a minute. To think perhaps those children could have been my grandkids. I pray some one with a heart would be kind and have that kind of love to save them.
Samantha
January 22nd, 2010
8:54 pm
IT SHOULDN’T MATTER WHAT COLOR THESE CHILDREN ARE “WE ARE ONE” AND WE NEED TO STAY AS ONE NO MATTER WHAT THE RACE MAY BE. I WOULD ADOPT ANY OF THOSE KIDS BECAUSE THEY NEED US!! WE ARE FAMILY GOD DIDN’T PUT US HERE TO FIGHT LIKE THIS OR TO HATE OR DISLIKE CAUSE OF COLOR. I’M ONLY 20 AND NOT YET MARRIED JUST ENGAGED SO I CAN’T AT THE TIME
PJ
January 22nd, 2010
8:59 pm
If It could happen right now, I will adopt…If there are children needing a home, security and love…I will adopt…
Food, clothing, water, a clean bed, these children need our help..
I will adopt if the red tape would be cut, these dear innocent children to be set free…
debbie deal
January 22nd, 2010
9:04 pm
please help me contact who i need to. so maybe i could adopt.
debbie deal
January 22nd, 2010
9:05 pm
my email is puppyholic@ymail.com
Tyler Grady
January 22nd, 2010
9:08 pm
I don not believe the above article. I think there will be a Huge need for people to step up and provide loving homes for these children without Parents, aunts, uncles, Brother or sister. I want to help. If any one knows how, please advise.
Tyler
407 342 1651
TRACEY
January 22nd, 2010
9:40 pm
My husband and I have 2 children. We would adopt a Haitian child but I am not sure how to do it. I would not want to wait years to get them. Can someone help? I am willing to give a home to a helpless child. Love Tracey
Danny
January 22nd, 2010
9:48 pm
I have been thinking about adopting a child for a long time. It hurts to see the destruction and knowing that so many children are homeless and hurt. Maybe now is the time that I get my home ready.
michael
January 22nd, 2010
10:17 pm
i feel really bad i will do anything they want me to do
michael
January 22nd, 2010
10:18 pm
i really feel bad i want to adopt a child
TRACEY
January 22nd, 2010
10:32 pm
it seems a lot of us are willing to take in a child. That is so sweet; It is so sad what happens around us. It is expensive to adopt, but if this is going to help out a child I think the government should think of the child and send them to a family that can Love them and help. …..Love Tracey….I wish I can do so much more.
Kitsie Morris
January 22nd, 2010
10:36 pm
My husband and I are not wealthy, but do pretty well. We’ve raised seven children who are now (almost) on their own. We have love in our hearts and a wonderful home. We CAN adopt a child or siblings, depending on the adoption fees. There must be a need for loving people like us.
Monet
January 22nd, 2010
10:40 pm
If it wasn’t for all this red tape I would adopt or foster tomorrow. My family has so much to offer.
sandra
January 22nd, 2010
11:10 pm
I hope that the children will find good ho,es I hope to find a child I only have one son i fill the need to help in this way but do not have the money . I wish to no what to do
Rebecca in Alaska
January 23rd, 2010
1:27 am
My husband and I have been watching the special on tv and had the thought to adopt as well. Now I’m not sure what to think. Some of these children probably have family members that can take them but the onditions are still horrendous! Perhaps there is a way to “foster” them until conditions are better.
We have raised our 6 kids and have enough love and room for a child, even if it is temporary. Money has always been tight but we still managed.
The previous comments about the “baggage” these children carry is a valid point, but, these children and people need our help NOW! If we could we would take them all! Alaska is harsh but its heart is BIG!!!
Carolyn Skaggs
January 23rd, 2010
2:54 am
I want with all my heart to adopt one of these children. If they ahve no family or the family cannot care for them these beautiful children have the ‘God given right’ to be loved and cared for and to ahve a family if they do not have one. I have one grown son. I have my own home. Ihave a room that would be this child’s room. I have so much love, caring, concern and I am a therapist so I have been and would be a good paretn. I ahve so much love to give a child taht has been through what these children have been through. I ahve God, the Lord Jesus Christ and He created these children and wants them to have parents. I am not sure who repsonds to this post but I want to adopt one of these beautiful children.
God bless you. I hope someone will contact me.
Mozo
January 23rd, 2010
2:55 am
I would simply love to adopt a little boy from Haiti. My wife and I are both ministers at an African-American church. We adopted triplet girls over 10 years ago, and have never regretted it. We would enjoy having a son. Our girls would greatly love a little brother. Sign me up!
Helena Vrettou
January 23rd, 2010
5:26 am
I would adopt one or two kids if there was need. I’ve already done it once !
Michelle
January 23rd, 2010
8:13 am
I believe that the organization SOS is trying to do right by these orphaned children in all honesty.
The children have already been traumatized enough to this point. Many of us in the U.S. have
been seeing all the faces on TV and feeling guilty and sad for the kids. We all know that we as a whole (including our homeless) have it a million times better than anyone in Haiti. That is a normal reaction to
have. The truth is Guilt fades….If someone was not planning on adoption prior to the earthquake and only
wants to adopt because they feel sorry for the children? This can cause a lot of problems too.
With all the good intentions initially, who knows how the child will adapt or the adoptive family.
I believe that a foster situation with the option to adopt later would be the most realistic option.
Debbie
January 23rd, 2010
11:11 am
I am a Registerd/Licensed Foster Parent/Adoptive Parent in Maryland. I have been for over 3 years. In that time, I have only been called on rarely to provide assistance, due to the affluence of the area in which I live. (Not much need for me to act, not many kids in need here.) My DSS keeps me on the roles though “in case” they need my empty beds, rather than share my info with other counties in my State. The US should allow folks like me to adopt these children using the US approved Homestudy I have, instead of requiring a private sector Homestudy to adopt from private adoption agencies. These children could be brought here and added to the US system and find homes. I have room in my heart and life for at least 2 children. My thoughts and prayers are with the people of Haiti, and the orphans. I was taken aback by the SOS agency comments. Seriously??? Too many people coming forward??? There were already over 300,000 orphans there and they haven’t placed them yet, and they have the gaul to discourage families from wanting to volunteer to give these children a better life? That spokesperson needs to find a new job…they are not in the right line of work.
Sherri
January 23rd, 2010
11:54 am
I’m a mother of 2, a n older son(9) and a little girl(3). My husband and I are trying to adopt (we’d take children that need to stay together) it’s been a hard go with the organization being busy but we’d love more children. If we could adopt and give these children a loving home we would. Not knowing the cost and the red flags going on but these children do need someone to care, love and give them a good life they deserve! Thanks
Mitzi
January 23rd, 2010
7:34 pm
Yes, we would adopt immediately. I am married with 2 children already and we have plenty of space for more kids. We just need to know what to do from here? We can even come to Haiti to pick the child up. Isn’t that better than a child being in Haiti right now suffering! Can someone rush the process? Why make these kids suffer any more?
val
January 23rd, 2010
9:03 pm
they make it so hard to adopt childern there are hundreds of kids that dont have a loving parent or parents they make u go threw courses on how to be a parent cost thousands of dollars only the RICH can afford to adopt you dont have to go threw home studies to have a baby why do they make you do it to adopt? they need to ease up on things i would love to have a brother or sister for my son he would love to have someone to play
Donna Burke
January 23rd, 2010
10:03 pm
I would adopt a child/orphan from Haiti who needs a loving family. We are less interested in an infant, as we already have a 14 and 19 year old. We’d love to be of assistance to a school age girl.
barbara fox
January 23rd, 2010
10:58 pm
i have raised 6 kids i would love to adopt any child in need. i just dont have the 3 or 4 thousand it takes to do so. you would think that love would outdo money?
chantay
January 24th, 2010
12:52 am
Yes, where are they and how I get information to adopt. Does anyone have the info? I am at winds2heave@yahoo.com
OpenUrHeart
January 24th, 2010
2:23 am
I would feel blessed and lucky to be able to adopt or even foster one of these amazing children. I don’t have much, but what I do have I’d give to them. I wouldn’t know how or where to begin. I’ve always been told how expensive it is to adopt and I just think that is wrong. Every child needs and wants a home. Love, support, loyalty and respect. Willing and able familys should be able to find a child who in return can be placed with them. It’s that easy. I understand measures are needed to make sure these children are going to safe homes, but it shouldn’t be about money. Every organization asks us for money, to donate, but we are talking about giving a child a new lease on life. I would rather send money to a fostering or adoptive family who has giving more then thier wallet. They have given thier hearts.
Just some of my thoughts.
Prophetess J
January 24th, 2010
3:15 am
Father God is Faithful, and Jesus loves us with an everlasting love. Children are God’s gift. The orphans are very, very special to the Lord Jesus. His desire is for us to reach out to them and love them. As a minister of the Lord, I admonishes the church especially, to adopt even one orphan. You will experience the Blessings of the Lord continually. For all of you who have adopted or foster an orphan with pure motives the Lord honors you! May His peace continue to be yours.
claudia
January 24th, 2010
2:44 pm
I understand that some people, including myself, would like adoptions to be faster, but I also understand that there has to be certain procedures done in order to assure a child’s safety. Nowadays, the trafficking of children is one of the main problems worldwide, and skipping some of the steps for adopting could only jeopardize and cause more harm to a child’s life. Right now, I am inquiring about all the steps for adoption, because I would really like to adopt 2-3 children. This is something that I have beeen talking with my husband, of 12 years now, since we first got married. We already have 4 children from our marriage, but we think that we have enough love to give and share with children that really need it. Our love is based in our family, always being together. I hope and wish with all my heart for Haiti people to find and get all the help they need. God bless them.
Deanna
January 24th, 2010
5:50 pm
My husband and I have wanted children for years and tried everything medically possible. We had given up hope and the adoption process is ardurous and so expensive we never thought it an option. We both work stable well paid jobs, have a wonderfully supportive family to help us. We would love to give a child from Haiti a stable loving home but aren’t sure about the process.
dixie pixie
January 25th, 2010
10:55 am
@ Connie Jenkins–
My husband and I have been trying to adopt for over three years. How did you manage to adopt 5? I would take a child, infant to 11 years old, from here or Haiti or wherever else!
Donna lowery
January 25th, 2010
6:51 pm
Yes They Need Us No We Can Not Fly To Get Them
Donna lowery
January 25th, 2010
6:52 pm
And Cant The State Pay For Them To Come Here. Why Not Cause There Just To Lazy To Help Them People In Haiti Survive.What Are They For?You know…?!
Donna lowery
January 25th, 2010
6:55 pm
Can You Pay The 3 Or Four Thousand Dollars To Fly o Haiti Just Two Times? I Cant
Donna lowery
January 25th, 2010
6:57 pm
I Meant To Haiti Two Times .Its Only 8 Thousand Dollars
Donna lowery
January 25th, 2010
6:59 pm
thts stupid
Kelly Freeman
January 27th, 2010
8:24 am
I am a single woman that has had the privilage to raise 4 very wounderful children. I am 47 years old and I have plenty of time and am finacialy stable . I fibd n=m y self feeling a bit lost now that my Children are grown and raising children and loving them seems to be what I do best. After hearing of this tragidy I have thought of little else except the children left without homes and families who love and care for them . This is the one thing that I feel I am more than willing to do . Helping to give a child that has not been able to or would ever be able to have the love and care in witch I feel I could provide would be the greatest gift I could give. I believe that I am a very loving and caring mother that puts nothing above the needs of a child no matter where they come from. I am able to give them the Love , nurturturing, stability,structure and home in which all of Gods children deserve to have. Please let me know what I can do to make this happpen for a deserving young child, God Bless and I am looking forward to a responce as soon as possible Thank You and my God be with you all as well as the children
Melanie
January 29th, 2010
12:16 pm
We would love to adopt an orphan and give him/her a home that she will be loved and have opportunities! I was a former teacher now a stay at home mother and would love to be able to give an orphaned child a loving home!
Barrack Obama
January 31st, 2010
9:15 am
Do we not have any children here in the US that need homes? I would say that when we can answer that question and say “NO” we have homes for every one of our children and they are well taken care of”. Then we “might look somewhere else. Are we just enabling a country when we give aid, or should we teach them how to fish for themselves? At what point do we say we have too many people in one country? Why don’t we all just move over there and they can move in here and take everything we have worked for! We might as well….. You idiots!
Lily
February 1st, 2010
3:05 am
I think that I would adopt a child from any country, I am a single mom of 2, and its hard, but I still want to and will, there would not be anything more humbling and meaningful to me than to give love to a child that is in need, and al children need to be loved and care for.
me
February 1st, 2010
11:43 pm
Imagine that you’re at work when whatever natural disaster is most probable in your state strikes. For me it would be an earthquake, for you it might be a flood, volcanic eruption, or hurricane. The natural disaster has toppled telephone poles and cell phone towers, damaged roads, and collapsed bridges. You try desperately to contact family members but no phones are working.
What was a simple 45 minute commute this morning has become an almost impossible journey. The freeway is impassible and roads are covered in debris. It takes you almost a week to reach home. When you finally arrive you receive word that your sister and her husband were seriously injured and did not survive. As you absorb this loss you worry about your three year old niece and five year old nephew.
After several frantic days you make it to your sister’s destroyed house only to find out from her neighbors that your niece and nephew have been taken by foreigners to be cared for in an orphanage. You are thankful to hear that they survived and are determined to find and care for them. Unfortunately, the neighbors don’t know which organization took the children. All they know is that they spoke only a little English and wore matching green shirts with words in either Spanish or Portuguese written on them.
You are frantically searching for the orphanage when word reaches you that foreigners have begun flying plane loads of children out of orphanages to be adopted in other countries. You start to panic for fear that by the time you find this orphanage it’ll be too late. If your niece and nephew have been taken to another country you may never be able to find them and bring them back. It’s now a race against time.
Jennifer Miller
February 21st, 2010
10:41 pm
I would adopt a child in a heartbeat! They need love!
Jenice
February 23rd, 2010
2:21 am
I absolutely would adopt a child from Haiti, ever since the tragic earthquakes, I have pondered the thought a thousand times , surely I dont know exactly how to go about it but through faith ,hope and love this will be answered. I feel when you are to adopt a child you must learn about the childs culture just as they are to learn yours as a family we set the lifestyle and enviroment .
annoymous
March 3rd, 2010
8:21 pm
No I would not adopt a child from Haiti. I agree that the culture is to different. I believe that I would put my own family and children at risk of abuse. I believe that even in pre teens and adulthood that they may betray the family trhat took them in. This happened to clean out all the 80% HIV infection there, the witchcraft, devil worship and even human sacrifice is preformed there. I am a Christian and do not believe they can even be converted.
Bob Watson
April 16th, 2010
5:27 pm
Why are there so many orphans (380,000 +) for a relatively small population?
lrlr
August 18th, 2010
11:01 am
Enter your comments here
christina
August 18th, 2010
11:04 am
Enter your comments here
hi i dint have any kids but would love to adopt. i would adopt from any place in the world i cant have my own kids but i have plenty of love to give to any kids. i wouldnt mind adopting two at one time so if u know anybody who need help with their babies let me know on my email at fivefootdime86@yahoo.com. im located in las vegas nevada
christina
August 18th, 2010
11:06 am
YES I WILL ADOPT FROM HAITI!