Comments on: Should soldier Moms be deployed away from babies?

By: She wouldn’t deploy, she got arrested

She wouldn’t deploy, she got arrested — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 18:32:50 +0000

[...] care for the child,” but the more popular opinions ran along the oft repeated phrase to “Ship her out!” And on the Orlando Sentinel, a “patriot” said simply that “Women shouldn’t [...]

By: Steve

Steve — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 02:37:10 +0000

Hmmn, where is Alexis’ father? Why does she have a different last name? Was she married before? Seems to be a pattern forming here. Maybe she should step up and be the first in her family to live up to her responsibilities.

By: Sparkle

Sparkle — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 20:45:40 +0000

YES soldier moms should be deployed. Why should someone be exempt from duty just because they are a parent? This young woman knew what she was getting into before she signed up for duty. Parenthood is NOT a privilege. In a capitalistic society like the United States parenthood is best left to persons who can AFFORD it. This young woman knew she did not have a support system when she CHOSE to have her child. People with children have to stop expecting employers to favor them just because they have a child because then the workplace becomes unequal, penalizing persons who do not have children or who have strong support systems for daycare forcing them to do more than their share of the work.

And this is NOT a racial issue. I am a middle-aged African American woman. I have had to make some painful decisions in my working career and one of them was the decision to not have children because I did not have the level of affluence necessary to be a stay-at-home mom and I didn’t have an employer who gave a d-mn. America is not a caring culture like Socialist Europe where daycare is provided. If you choose to have a child in this country it is YOUR responsibility to be in a position to take care of your child not your employer’s or the government’s.

If you can’t afford to be a stay-at-home mom then you will have to make the same somewhat painful decision I made when I was a young working woman – forego motherhood.

By: goingtowar

goingtowar — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 22:29:19 +0000

OMG, why the anger? Is this auto destruction? there are so many jobs that need to be done. I have been in active duty and now on reserve over seven years. I am a MOM of 2 children under three and I am on my way to war for a year…
I can do it. I volunteered. My wonderful husband will care for children. Maybe if I did not serve like a lot of moms and females, a lot of males would be forced to serve or DRAFT. Do not judge your own, everyone has a different situation. Why not putting her in a guard job or in the border, cleaning etc… why not? and offer the wonderful pay benefits of deployment to someone that willfully and gratefully will do.
For example, now I am being judged for leaving my children so when does it stop.
Am I guaranteed my children will be better or worse when I come back or that my husband will love me the same?
We all take those risks when we sign and we should all help each other; after all we are all a big family of VETS.
Best Wishes to all.
PD:I found this blog looking for answers to my personal questions and support.

By: Activeduty Dad

Activeduty Dad — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 03:52:08 +0000

I am in the military and I am a dad, deployed away from my 1 month old daughter. It does not seem fair that just because she is a mother she gets to stay behind. I joined the military and gave my oath as did she. It is up to me to uphold my commitment to the people of United States. If this is alowed to happen once it will happen again.

By: real

real — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 13:04:37 +0000

Idk what is wrong w/ all of you but do NOT send his woman away fro her child!Her back up plan has back fired..she is not sayng I do’t want to deploy ata all she said give me time to fnd some1 to take my child that trust! They could schedule a lenght of time and if she doesnt by then discharge her…it’s been done before this is not a new case! I also am in the military and i associate with situations like this! I would do the samething if it were my child! She may be deployed a yr ATLEAST! if she comes back what if she doesnt and her child is in foster care! it would be too difficult to get her child back in the custody of her family…I truely am prayig fortis situation!

By: Alana

Alana — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 05:58:05 +0000

send her off. my hubbys there no questions we have a 4 month old he got to know for 6 weeks before going on his 3rd full year deployment… she choose this job before having the baby and she still choose to have a baby knowing what it would mean… you cant cry equal rights then pull a stunt like this…

By: Kasey

Kasey — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 05:22:51 +0000

I am a Soldier, I am deployed to Iraq right now, I also have a 6 month old baby. It is VERY difficult to leave my child with anyone other then my husband, who by the way is ALSO here. No one will care for my child the way I do, or at least that is what I think. I had a options before I deployed, because my Chain of Command cared for me. One was to leave in November, to Iraq with my husband for one year, two was to leave to Afghanistan in February (making my son 9 months) for one year, and three was to be non deployable for the time my husband was gone, BUT then leave when he returned to I don’t know where, for one year. I did my homework, separation anxiety appears in children starting at 8 to 12 months. So while many (including me) would like to see new mom’s non deployable for a longer amount of time, the truth is, it is better for the child. I gave up a lot by leaving early, I had to stop nursing, and everything else that goes with the first year of life. My son is thriving still with my in-law’s, he has not missed a milestone, he knows who his parents are, by hearing and seeing us, and best of all, he will never know we were gone.
Furthermore, it is not any easier for fathers to leave a new baby. Some men handle stress differently, mine chooses to ignore much of the pain. While I stay up to see my son on the web cam, he wraps himself in his work. We both maintain a positive out look on our life. Many great things are to come. The Army has no paternity plan either, my husband left us when out son was 7 weeks old because he had a school to attend. Leaving me with a newborn, a full time job, and no help at the house.
That is where networking comes into play, “It takes a village to raise a child” has new meaning in modern society. Our neighbors had come to my rescue, they would bring me a plate for dinner, or sit with my son so I could do a load of laundry… things like that.
Personal outlook, this female handled her situation with her heart, not her mind. There were so many resources for her to utilize if what she claims was said to her was true. Again, as a new mom facing deployment there were many times I wished my plan would “fall through” but duty calls and I would much rather my son grow up and know I served our great country, then faced punishment because I could not properly exhaust all resources.
SPC Crauthers, 4years service, deployment number 2.

By: Erin

Erin — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:37:37 +0000

For those worried about the kid, the grandmother flew back and took him again as soon as this blew up. He isn’t waiting in the foster system while they look into this.

By: princessnik

princessnik — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:25:46 +0000

@ Patti

November 16th, 2009
9:28 pm
This is the problem with being a “Single” parent. Where is the baby’s Daddy? This type of behavior just perpetuates itself. This is probably the first of many children she will have out of wedlock

WOW! not every single parent goes on to keep having kids! Single parenthood is not easy but I’d rather be a single parent than to have stayed with my daughters father, yes at the time we thought we were in love, just like some couples who end up DIVORCED. We just realized we were not going to make it early enough to not get married but not early enough to prevent the child. All that to say I personally have one child and will not have another one without a HUSBAND and I’m sure there are plenty of other single mothers who have the same sentiment.

I agree that this mom knew when she signed up what would be expected of her. However if she went through the proper chain of command and asked for more time because she needed a “new Plan” i think they should have given her maybe 30 days to get it together not threaten her with foster care.