Birthing trends: ‘Mad Men’ explores the horrors of giving birth in the ’60s; how about now and in the future?
Last Sunday’s episode of “Mad Men” offered a visceral and scary view of giving birth in the 1960s. It was titled very appropriately “The Fog.” (The producers of the show even did a whole video about why they wanted to explore giving birth in the 1960s. See the clip above. The first 2.5 minutes apply to our topic.)
Betty Draper was pregnant with her third child on the show. She smoked and drank her way through the pregnancy and didn’t eat much other than Melba toast and cottage cheese, so she wouldn’t ruin her figure of course. (Oh is that where I went wrong – eating sausage biscuits?)
(Here’s part of Betty’s visit to the hospital to give birth.)
When the time came, her husband Don drove her to the hospital. The nurse plopped her in a wheel chair and told Don his job was done and to go sit and wait. They proceeded to take her a room to shave her entirely and give her an enema. These things sound terrible under normal circumstances much less while you’re in labor. Then she was given narcotics (by a nurse that kept missing her vein – where is the patient’s bill of rights???) to put her into a fog to give birth.
Later in the episode, she was calling for Don and they wouldn’t bring him to her. She was all alone, drugged up and freaking out!
After a long dream sequence, she finally comes to in her hospital room holding her newborn. (That seems safe give the drugged up lady her brand-new baby!)
It was heartwrenching to watch what a terrible experience it was to give birth back then. No warmth. No personal choice. No options. No husband with you to help you and to experience the joy. No joy.
I know my mother had the twilight drug with both of us. She had no idea what she had either time and had no idea how we came out of her body.
I’m so happy it’s not like that anymore. My first birthing experience was OK, but my second and third births with my midwives were much better. I had my birth plan for the last two. The midwives and nurses actually read it and knew exactly what I wanted from my birthing experience and what I was worried about. Michael didn’t leave my side for even a moment. They used minimal drugs with my second and none with my third. I nursed all three immediately and roomed in with them all. I co-slept with my last two in the hospital. The last two births were exactly the experience I wanted.
All of the practices of the ’60s seem so crazy now. After watching the show together, Michael wondered which practices of ours will be thought of as foolish or scary in the future.
If you saw the show, tell me what you thought of Betty’s birthing experience. If you gave birth in the ’60s, ’70s, ’80s, ’90s or 2000s tell us about your experiences then. How do you think childbirth will change for the next generation? What will they think we did was crazy?
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85 comments Add your comment
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
7:28 am
Very upsetting news about the baby left in the storm drain — the baby has died. The 18-year-old mom allegedly delivered at her boyfriend’s home (can you imagine!) and then went to the hospital. According to Police, the boyfriend then allegedly left the baby in a storm drain near the house.
http://www.ajc.com/news/dekalb/baby-left-in-storm-140351.htmlere
so upsetting, poor baby. God bless the baby!
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
7:29 am
Unrelated but about babies — Katherine Heigl and her husband have adopted a special needs baby — the pictures are fantastic. the baby is just sooo beautiful and Katherine looks sooo happy.
http://celebrity-babies.com/2009/09/17/katherine-heigl-and-josh-kelley-introduce-naleigh/
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
7:43 am
I love “Mad Men” I love to see what it was like to live in a time before I was even born. The amount of drinking, Vodka in Milk in the morning…REALLY???, and smoking is terrifying to watch. It makes you wonder how anybody survived that time period.
The birth sequence was pretty terrifying from a father’s perspective because you were just expected to wait in the waiting room until your wife had the baby. And the nurse, played by Lisa Simpson, aka Yerdley Smith, could have cared less about the concerns of the father….scary stuff.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
7:50 am
We totally caught the Lisa Simpson — what’s up with that – we decided she was just a fan of the show.
there is no way I would want Michael away from me while I was giving birth. He wanted to be there too!! I thought for certain that guy’s wife was going to die in the show.
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
8:04 am
The one thing that irritates me is that on DirectTV, I’m not sure if it is the same with other providers, the AMC channel is in standard definition..ONLY…What’s up with that?
I want to see the 60’s in full high def.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
8:10 am
i think comcast has in high def. — don draper is pretty! — my husband’s work associate is the sister of Jon Hamm’s girlfriend. All the work friends in NY got to meet him and they said he was soo nice.
Michael is correct...
September 18th, 2009
8:15 am
…”Michael wondered which practices of ours will be thought of as foolish or scary in the future”. You will probably find out that what you think was a perfect experience was really, really wrong (just as all the drinking and smoking back then has been proven to be bad – but that was DURING the pregnancy), so don’t get too smug yet!
And, contrary to popular belief TODAY, not having any sort of medication during the labor period is not necessarily a good thing – some women have the mentality that the drugs are harmful to the fetus, when in actuality the stress on the mother who is in pain directly impacts the well being of the fetus during the birthing process, so it is really a trade off, and can be really detrimental if problems (i.e. – fetal distress) occurs. Just be careful about being “macho”, ladies!
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
8:16 am
SPOILER ALERT!!! STOP READING IF YOU DON’T WANT A PLOT SPOILER TO FOLLOW:
@Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
Does it bother you that Peter doesn’t seem to care about the fact that Peggy had his baby? It bothers my wife quite a bit.
DB
September 18th, 2009
8:22 am
New Mom — maybe you better skip reading this column today!!
I vividly remember my mother giving birth in 1969 — I was 13, and although I wasn’t there, she was pretty forthcoming with the details. She smoked — althoughshe did cut down a bit — and had an occasional cocktail throughout her pregnancy. The doctor told her that, throughout her pregnancy, she was to life nothing heavier than a wash rag! There was absolutely no question of my father being in the delivery room — heck, I can probably count on one hand how many times he changed a diaper!! She was very glad to use the “twilight” drugs — she’s not big on pain — and the typical hospital stay was about a week. No nursing — according to her, formula was more “convenient and less messy.” She was very typical of her time.
My first was born in 1988. Second in 1991. First was an emergency C-section after two days of unproductive stop-and-start labor, but my husband was there for every minute, including the surgery. I remember being completely ticked off because I didn’t get to hold the baby first — he did! They let me stay awake for the delivery, but I was out probably a minute after he was born and I heard him cry, and didn’t wake up again for another couple of hours, in recovery. I was in the hospital from Sunday to Friday. Very long recovery.
The second was a VBAC, which worked very well. They ended up inducing me because my blood pressure spiked at the last minute. It was actually very nice — I was the only one on the maternity floor for the majority of the day (obviously, not at Piedmont or Northside!), and, except for a nurse who missed the IV three times (ha!), it was a very positive experience. I don’t do epidurals — the idea of someone sticking a needle in my spine was far more disturbing than labor, to me! Euwww! They had an anesthesiologist on call just in case, since I was a VBAC, but no problems at all, in the hospital two nights, and the recovery period was practically nothing, compared to previously.
My mother thought I was a raving idiot for not getting knocked out — I told her that they don’t even do it anymore, and she was aghast. All see could do is go on and on about how painful it was, and was I sure that I couldn’t get knocked out? (Thanks, Mom . . .) And when I chose to nurse, she was convinced I had reverted to some sort of crazed Earth Mother routine, because only hippies nursed their kids (I was in banking — so hardly!)
I think the thing that strikes me about the difference between today and my time is the emphasis on keeping physically fit throughout the pregnancy. Most of the new moms I meet today are much more conscientious about exercise than I was. I did some swimming, half-heartedly, but moms today are much more active. I’m still a little amazed at the people that give birth and are home later that day or the next day — although, with all the stuff floating around hospitals, there’s probably a good reason to prefer to be home than prolonged exposure at the hospital!
Please
September 18th, 2009
8:32 am
I have problems with any man writing about the birthing experience.
jct
September 18th, 2009
8:32 am
Love Mad Men. Even though I have never given birth, I am glad there are options today. Even more distrubing to me is the way Betty treats her children. Has she said three words to her son this season? The way she tell her daughter to ‘go watch TV’ when she wants to talk sends pit to my stomach everytime.
@Dr. Horrible – Peter is a tool. When is he gonna wake up and ask about his child?
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
8:35 am
Peter seemed very upset at first (there was that scene with the shot gun I think at the very end of last season) but then we never did see any follow up questions –
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
8:37 am
@Please
HUH?
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
8:38 am
FUN Friday….LOL!
As many of you know, I do not watch much TV( less than 3-4 hours per week) and so know nothing about this series.
I had great pregnancies and worked up until the week before delivery both times.
I had my son nearly 23 years ago…my water broke at 3:00 a.m. and we headed to the hospital.
Yes, I had drugs. I was in labor for 12 hours and nothing was happening. My Doctor told me he was getting ready to leave the hospital and the next Doctor, in the practice, would be there with me if I wanted to hang on. The original Doctor was the one ( in the practice) we liked the best. He calmly recommended a C section ( but made it our choice) as it appeared the baby was quite large. ( NO sonogram the entire pregnancy back then…you only had one if things looked bad as insurance did not cover it for us).
I delivered a 10 pound 8 ounce boy ( with the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck) C section.
He was fine. We stayed in the hospital 5 days and everyone commented on him in the nursery, that he must be at least a month old. We still laugh about it….everything is BIG in Texas.
Five years later and we moved here to Gwinnett. I fought with my doctors to repeat a C-section.
This was when VBACS were new and they were trying to make a quota. I spoke with our insurance and due to my previous pregnancy, they approved it. Nothing doing with the Doctors.
I was in labor over 24 hours and our daughter was yanked out of me. The nurse was straddled over my mid section and pushing while the doctor was using the forceps and suction to pry her out.
The sonogram showed that she was nearly 9 pounds but the Doctor was determined for a VBAC.
Our daugher’s arm was paralyzed and she was diagnosed with ERB”S PALSY. This is due to nerve damage and caused by yanking her out of me and stretching the nerves in the C-5/6 range. What a mess. Her little right arm hung like a piece of wet spaghetti. I had to pin her sleeve to the front of her clothes so it would not get tangled in the back. She had no feeling nor could she move it. It was a nightmare and caused by a choice made by doctors who still practice here.
After MANY prayers and various medical attention, she regained use of her arm. She has 95 per cent usage now and most would not even be able to tell. I cried as I nursed my baby for 6 months, now knowing what would happen. She is a wonderful 17 year old now but there are still things she cannot do.
Needless to say, the birth experience was a nightmare the second time around. I have conferred with neurologists, while traveling, and they affirmed that the Doctor made a very poor choice and was lucky that neither of us died. We feel blessed.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
8:41 am
FYI…sorry for the long post…YES I was awake with both of mine and my husband was there too.
He was green around the collar both times but he stayed with me and was in awe about the miracle of birth. It is a magnificent experience to welcome a new life into the world and to know that child is yours.
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
8:42 am
SPOILER ALERT!!! STOP READING IF YOU DON’T WANT A PLOT SPOILER TO FOLLOW:
I also wonder if the baby Betty had is actually Don’s……remember Betty had that little encounter with the man in the storeroom at the bar??…..Something to think about anyway…LOL.
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
September 18th, 2009
8:43 am
Oh my goodness MJG — Sue, sue, sue!!!! holy cow!!
Please
September 18th, 2009
8:50 am
As far as I know, no man has ever given birth. How can he write about the experience? I have never given birth. I couldn’t write about the experience.
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
8:53 am
@Please
Um, ok and at what point in this entire blog discussion has a man written about the birth experience? I’m realy confused.
Please
September 18th, 2009
8:55 am
I watched the video. The writer of the show is a man. He was writing about the birth experience.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
8:59 am
@ theresa, yes we did have a video shot with our daughter, for attorneys to use in the event of a law suit., LUCKILY she regained use of her arm and we both agreed to let it go. Two of the three doctors are still here.
I would MUCH rather have a healthy child than any amount of money.
The sad part was that both of my pregnancies were just great. I worked the entire time. I ate all the right foods, even no coffee with my son. I had to have a cup here since I was tackling the interstate to get to work….haha! In Texas, I passed by 3 stop signs on my way to Kindergarten….oh the days!
Then, the horrendous delivery and “damaged” baby.
We feel blessed that things turned out for her and us. She is a great kid.
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
9:02 am
@Please
Matthew Weiner is the principle writer of the show yes, but something tells me he probably had female consultants help him out with the writing of the birthing sequence. You tell me, if you saw the birth episode in question, was it written poorly?
Stan
September 18th, 2009
9:04 am
MJG,
To your point, sometimes Drs get complexes about them knowing everything. They don’t! Sometimes you really have to put your foot down and explain to them that they are going to do it this way or you will find a new dr that will.
I’ve had to do this a couple of times with both my own docs and my wifes when her kidney came out.
Glad everything turned out mostly ok for your daughter
Uh, Theresa...
September 18th, 2009
9:05 am
…re: motherjanegoose’s delivery and subsequent difficulties, it is way too late to sue – and why would you suggest such a thing? Doctors are human, too, and usually it is the mother who demands that she be allowed the VBAC ’cause she wants to be a “real” woman. It is usually those women who end up suing when the baby ends up damaged.
Sorry for the problems, motherjane, glad it all worked out for you and your daughter. Some doctors are just pigs – 17 years ago MOST doctors knew better than to force a VBAC – you and your daughter are really, REALLY lucky, and so is that Dumb a$$ MD!
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
9:06 am
@ Please
This should help clear it up for you. This comes from the Mad Men Wikipedia page:
As of the third season, seven of the nine writers for the show are women, in spite of Writers Guild of America 2006 statistics that show male writers outnumber female writers by 2-to-1.[15] As Maria Jacquemetton notes:
We have a predominately female writing staff — women from their early 20s to their 50s — and plenty of female department heads and directors. [Show creator] Matt Weiner and [executive producer] Scott Hornbacher hire people they believe in, based on their talent and their experience. ‘Can you capture this world? Can you bring great storytelling?’[15]
Please
September 18th, 2009
9:07 am
I’ve never given birth so I couldn’t tell you. So unless the writer is a female who gave birth during the ’60’s, I have a problem believing everything they write. Of course I take most tv shows and movies with a grain of salt. Reality doesn’t always make good tv.
YUKI
September 18th, 2009
9:07 am
I don’t watch the show but it looks like something I would enjoy. But as far as the giving birth part….yikes!! I cannot imagine going through something like that. I had my baby 19 months ago and it was a great experience. Labor pains (pretty tough), drove to hosptial, got epidural (LIFESAVER), and then smooth sailing! Even though I was in labor most of the day, it was not bad at all. Husband right there for support and watched the whole thing. Pushing was a litle tough but nothing really horrible, baby came out…..JOY!!! I was really lucky to have such a wonderful experience and I realize that. My mom told me that she had drugs as well, not epidural but not sure what it is called. I would have to ask her more about that to see what her experience was….but hopefully not cold and horrible like you described in the paragraphs above.
So happy to have had my experince in 2008 as opposed to the 60’s….but I guess if they didn’t know better than they didn’t know it was bad!
New Stepmom
September 18th, 2009
9:11 am
We hope to have a baby asap and the birth part scares me to death. I also have mixed feelings about the hubs being in the room with me. I have heard of men that are so grossed out they never touch their wives again. That is just me being paranoid I am sure. I also think that I will have an epidural. I am lucky that I have a fabulous doc that I know well due to 3 surgeries and I know I will be taken care of by her or her colleagues.
MJG, that is terrible about your daughter. I am so glad she has such good use of her arm. My cousins adopted a little girl from India 2.5 years ago with the same issue. It is amazing how much use of her arm she has regained with physical therapy. I am so glad she is here, she is shining light in our family.
Please
September 18th, 2009
9:15 am
Clear as mud. lol Thanks.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
9:18 am
In case anyone wants to be informed: http://www.erbspalsyonline.com/ explains things
No, I did not have gestational diabetes, My first doctor told me I was a perfect incubator and thus had large healthy babies…obviously, I did not talk to the doctor much after the birth of my daughter.
Geez, New Stepmom...
September 18th, 2009
9:18 am
…it is usually the mother who, after going through pregnancy and the birth process, says “my husband is never going to touch me again!” I have NEVER heard it the way you describe it(LOL).
YUKI
September 18th, 2009
9:21 am
New Stepmom, I thought my husband would be grossed out too. I had insisted that he stay near my head as opposed to “down there” when it was time to deliver. He actually ended up watching the whole thing and was not grossed out at all. I think he was just so amazed by the whole process….he thought I would be a moster the whole time freaking out and yelling but I was pretty calm and normal (thanks Epidural!)…I know he does not regret watching the miracle of birth and believe me, it does not make him not want to touch me!
Becky
September 18th, 2009
9:22 am
@Please..I have never given birth, nor have I seen this show..My only experience with child birth is that I was in the delivery room with my sister when she had two of her three boys..So thanks for sharing your negative attitude with us today..
So a man may have not been through the birthing process, but the time spent waiting, pacing and being scared, nervous or whatever you may be feeling, isn’t something to discredit..
Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend..
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
9:27 am
@Please
Thank you for reminding me that statistically most of the population has only an eighth grade education.
I give people way too much credit sometimes.
New Stepmom
September 18th, 2009
9:28 am
Do a little research, there are men out there that are traumatized by birth. Again, it is me being paranoid and scared, but the thought has crossed my mind. My husband will be with me, but I am not sure how excited I am about that part…just being 100% honest…
New Stepmom
September 18th, 2009
9:29 am
Thanks YUKI!!!!
In case anyone wants to be informed...
September 18th, 2009
9:30 am
…Erb’s palsy, also known as a brachial plexus injury incurred during the birth/delivery is a KNOWN complication of the birth process – called shoulder dystocia – and there are many causes of it. There are also several manuevers physicians perform to reduce the dystocia problem, including the breaking of the fetus’ clavical in order to complete the delivery process. Whether or not permanent damage is incurred by the fetus is basically the luck of the draw. Motherjanegoose’s experience is the result of an incompetent MD, though it may be that he really did not expect there to be the dystocia problem and there were no other known reasons to not try the VBAC (except when the mother said she wanted a c-section HE SHOULD HAVE LISTENED!. Sometimes when shoulder dystocia occurs there is still enough time to do a c-section, but most times the delivery is already almost completed when the “stuck” part happens.
Sure glad it all worked out for motherjane and, especially, her daughter.
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
9:32 am
I thought I’d be freaked out when my wife gave birth to our daughter, who is now 5, but I was actually fascinated by the whole experience…it is very surreal. So when my son came along 3 years later it was cake.
Geez, New Stepmom...
September 18th, 2009
9:36 am
I didn’t say that some men were not traumatized by viewing the birth process, only that most times it is the mother who says no one is ever going to touch her again (i.e. – no more sex for you, mister – insert laughter here, even though you cannot seemingly understand sarcasm/humor when presented with it). Please read and comprehend before suggesting that research be done!
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
9:37 am
@ in case….all doctors in the practice were women. I told them that I would endure 12 hours of labor and then wanted a C section if nothing was progressing. My primary doctor was not in the hospital for hours ( had a family emergency) and those that were there kept calling her to check in to see what she wanted to do….wait. I was in labor for 24 hours and exhausted, when she arrived. My husband said my face was a blue as a blueberry while I was pushing…he was scared for me.
Please
September 18th, 2009
9:38 am
@Dr. Horrible. Glad you feel so superior to others. I thought I was entitled to my opinion. Once again, one person is allowed to try and force their opinion on others. Have a great day!
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
9:42 am
@Please
It was the Clear as mud comment you gave after I succinctly answered your question as to how a man would know anything about the birthing experience. I even provided proof in the form of verbiage from the website stating that 7 OUT OF 9 of the show’s writer’s are women….WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND?
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
9:42 am
HAHA
.@ Dr. Horrible….any MAN who says “So when my son came along 3 years later it was cake.”
Needs to be whipped….please eat your 9:27 post.
This may be why some posters are not buying into the birth of a child being written by a man….you gave me a good laugh…nothing about childbirth is cake…is it? Maybe I am the ONLY mother who was in the teensiest bit of pain and misery while on the table…LOL. Did any one have FUN while delivering?
Becky
September 18th, 2009
9:47 am
Stan, you are so right about Drs. and their knowing everything..I have a sister that is a IV tech for a hugh hospital in VA and you should hear some of the things that she tells that the Drs. there do..
MotherJaneGoose..Sorry to hear that your family went through that with your daughter..Glad to know that for the most part, everything worked out..
Please
September 18th, 2009
9:48 am
Because your comments didn’t prove anything to me. All women do not give birth. I don’t know if any of the women writers gave birth in the ’60’s. I understand what you are saying, I just don’t totally agree with it.
I believe...
September 18th, 2009
9:48 am
motherjanegoose, that Dr. Horrible meant it was a “piece of cake” FOR HIM – he was responding to New Stepmom who is afraid that her husband will not touch her again due to being traumatized by the birth process.
Hey, Please...
September 18th, 2009
9:52 am
…you must be a democrat with that “entitled” statement!
BlondeHoney
September 18th, 2009
9:53 am
Like MJG, i had my boys in the 80’s (they are now 24 & 23 respectively) and the only drugs i had was the epidural which was FABULOUS. I had awesome Dr.’s and nurses, had my babies with me in my cozy warm tastefully decorated room. My sister had her 1st baby last year & I was with her & her husband for the delivery and the first two weeks…seems to me there’s not much difference today EXCEPT you couldn’t move for tripping over lactation counselers…wtf?? My sister had a visit every hour on the hour & we joked that it was “operation lactation”. Except they were so busy with lactation that NO ONE told her she needed to burp her baby after feeding. My poor sis said she thought if she was nursing she didn’t need to burp Maggie. Enough already with the lactation counselors good grief…my lactation counselor was called my nurse & it worked just fine. Lactation counselors are just something else to charge you for IMHO
Andrea
September 18th, 2009
9:54 am
@YUKI & NewStepmom: I have heard of men who are TOTALLY grossed out by the whole birthing procedure and said it turned them off sexually. I thought about that when I had my children. My son was premature so there was a 10 minute C-section and all was done! My then husband was at my head because the doctors said he could not be “down there”. I was actually relieved to be totally honest that he wasn’t looking!
My daughter was a different story. She came the day before she was actually due and he was very excited about seeing the birth. I was not however. Thankfully he fainted and it was not an issue (100% true)! He woke up in a chair in the corner and the baby was born. He was totally bummed about missing it and I publically lamented with him and privately rejoiced. The doctor did leave an extra piece of the cord attached so he could cut it, but she was in the little baby bed.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
9:57 am
@ I believe…I knew that….but any man who ever says childbirth is a piece pf cake, whether for him or the mother, deserves a little ribbing don’t you think?
MOMS…please tell me who thought childbirth was a piece of cake….I need to know what drugs you took! I may need them when I turn 60.
Please
September 18th, 2009
9:58 am
Not a D. The only thing I think I am entitled to is my opinion.
Andrea
September 18th, 2009
10:00 am
@MJG: No you are not alone in your misery. When I had my daughter she was a whopper (over 8 pounds) and I had TWO epidurals that never worked because the anesthesiologist didn’t place the thing in my back right so when I was fed medicine it never went into my veins. I was in labor for 15 1/2 hours before she got here.
I was always told ‘As soon as you see the baby, you forget about the labor’. BIG LIE! I loved her from the moment I saw her but I was still in pain.
Hey Andrea and New Stepmom...
September 18th, 2009
10:19 am
…both of you have “heard” of men who were grossed out and turned of sexually after viewing the birth process. I have “heard”, too, that if a frog had wings he would not whomp his a$$ every time he jumped.
deidre_NC
September 18th, 2009
10:21 am
1974 1st son—i was in labor for 14 hours-i swear this is true, when i started pushing thats when they gave me the epideural….it didnt take effect until he was born so i spent the first several hours of his life numb from the waist down…i was SO MAD!! i was also stupid..i had read a book about natural childbirth that convinced me that childbirth wasnt painful if you did it right!!! i was scared to death because of the pain that i thought meant things werent right..it was not a great experience!!! he wieghed 7 lbs
1976-first daughter-had a wonderful WOMAN doctor…not drugs..labor lasted 6 hours–all natural-no enema no shaving etc…husband was with me the whole time…its was a great experience…but yeah it did hurt like hell lol..she weighed 8 lns and was 18 in long so it was like giving birth to a little butterball turkey lol..
1981-2nd son-10 hrs of labor-no meds-no progress with labor-finally got inducing drugs…3 hours later 9 lbs son born…still no drugs…husband was there….not too bad..doctor had told me he would weigh 6 lbs…he weighed 9 lol
1992-2nd daughter-had placenta previa-c-section 6 weeks early after a 2 week hospital stay-husband was there and said it was sorta like watching a deer being gutted…(rolls my eyes)–
when i got pregnant with the 4th i was all about epideural..no way was i going natural again..i decided that that was a bunch of crap…why have so much pain if you dont need to…thats how my attitude changed in the 17 years from 1st birth to 4th….i breastfed all….my 2nd son..they tried to give me those pills that dry your milk…lucky for me i am no one to take pills without knowing exactly what they are and what they are for…nurse said oh thats just standard procedure—geeze…
i have to say-when i was pregnant with my 1st—i was given no list of what to do or not do….2 years later with my 2nd..i was given a list a mile long of what NOT to do…what not to eat-drink-tons of stuff…and a lot of it i had done with my first…after that i just kind of depended on my own intelligence and did what i thought was right…..
oh yeah…the first one…i was given tons of drugs for pain i guess…i was really out of it and so scared and the nurses were so hateful….i hoinestly thought i was dying because it hurt so bad…none of them ever told me it was normal to hurt!!! they barely spoke english….when my water broke and my husband went to tell them they thought he wanted a glass of water and took him to the water fountain lol..he was as uniformed as i was about the whole process and hated it..the second one we took lamaze classes and it was much better!
deidre_NC
September 18th, 2009
10:25 am
tons of typos for all you typo police out there…sorry :)
YUKI
September 18th, 2009
10:50 am
I forgot to mention the funny thing that happened right after my son was born. On the birth plan we decided that my husband would cut the cord (he didn’t want to at first but changed his mind), but the cord snapped as he was coming out (I think it was wrapped around neck in some way) and got blood all over the midwife. I didn’t realize what had happened then I look up and there is the midwife with blood all over her face and in her hair. I almost died, it was sort of horrifying but she had a sense of humor about it and said she has seen everything imaginable. Just one of those crazy things that happens.
teeincsg
September 18th, 2009
10:51 am
@ MotherJaneGoose: I’m glad things are going fine for your daughter and your family. I cannot imagine!
I don’t watch the show, but had my kids within the past 5 years.
I had wonderful pregnancies for both, especially my first. I did have gestational diabetes for both though, and had to take insulin the last three weeks of my second pregnancy. But other than that it was great.
My daughter was a big baby as far as my midwife was concerned, and I’m totally convinced to this day that she stripped my membranes at my last visit which really ended up being my last visit because I went into labor 8 hours later. I labored for 20 hours but I would not dilate past 4 and my daughter was so comfortable she started going into distress which gave way to me having an emergency C. She was fine though and completely changed my life. I was up and at ‘em as soon as I was released from recovery.
I was considered “high risk” with my son because of my previous gestational diabetes with my daughter so a C-section was scheduled. Cool with me, I had nothing to prove.
Other than him kicking the doctor when she went to get him and some fluid on his lungs, he was fine.
He was the sleepiest baby I ever met!
teeincsg
September 18th, 2009
10:54 am
Oh, and my husband was there…acting like he was a doctor. He really got into the scrubs and mask and posing like he was on a photo shoot and doing stand up comedy in the OR.
Floretta
September 18th, 2009
12:41 pm
@Please: Er, the writer of the episode The Fog was Kater Gordon, birth name Katherine L. Gordon – female.
Most of the writers (7 of 9) on Mad Men are women: Marti Noxon, Lisa Albert, Kater Gordon, Dahvi Waller, Robin Veith, Cathryn Humphris, and Maria Jacquemetton.
Maybe you meant the creator, Matthew Weiner?
Dr. Horrible
September 18th, 2009
1:08 pm
@motherjanegoose
Actually it was cake for me and it was cake for my wife the second time as well. She was in labor with our daughter, now 5, for five hours and she was in labor with our son, now 2, for three hours. Even my wife agrees that the second time around for both of us was cake, compared to the first time.
lakerat
September 18th, 2009
1:16 pm
Dr. Horrible – MJG always likes to stir the pot. She enjoys getting into long winded pissing contests with other posters on the blog for no reason what so ever.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
1:31 pm
@lakerat, is that you 1;16 or your imposter? You were in my corner yesterday.
Yes, I am long winded…it is one trait I am well aware of.
Since I am tired of stirring a real pot, this is one pot I do like to stir!
Contests are fun too.
@ Dr. Horrible, for many of us a 3-5 hour labor WOULD be a piece of cake!
My sister has a former neighbor who has milked cows for years…while on a stool in a squatting position. She has 10 kids I think and each one has literally popped out as her muscles are so flexible from all that squatting. Maybe in my next life I will milk cows instead of teaching….LOL.
Please
September 18th, 2009
1:35 pm
Kater Gordan aged 27. Not old enough to have experienced childbirth in the ’60’s. Couldn’t find out if she has experienced childbirth at all.
lakerat
September 18th, 2009
2:00 pm
Yes, MJG, that was the imposter at 1:16 – we had the discussion re: your MD’s blunder this time last year so I have refrained from commenting today, yet I did not know that your daughter suffered from the Erb’s Palsy – as someone else has already said, both of you, but especially your daughter, is very lucky due to the boneheadedness of your OB..
HB
September 18th, 2009
2:00 pm
So I take it, Please, that in general you’re opposed to historical fiction? No one can write what on they haven’t actually experienced themselves? Interesting…and limiting. But to each, his own.
lakerat
September 18th, 2009
2:02 pm
My bad – should be “are very lucky”, but your daughter IS lucky!
Please
September 18th, 2009
2:09 pm
HB, how in the world did you manage to get that out of the fact that I don’t quite believe something that someone wrote?
HB
September 18th, 2009
2:26 pm
It just sounds like you’re saying someone will get the possible details mostly wrong in writing a fictional story if they weren’t actually there to experience the time and event as opposed to having done research, interviews, etc. But I guess misunderstood your comments.
Lynn
September 18th, 2009
2:42 pm
1981, 24 hours labor with my first born, 1991, 6 hours with my second & 1994, 1/2 hour with my last…. we almost didn’t make it to the hospital with her ;)
Becky
September 18th, 2009
3:21 pm
HB, you aren’t alone in thinking what you said..I was thinking the same thing..Oh well, as I said before..I haven’t ever given birth, so I guess I don’t know either..
Kris
September 18th, 2009
4:05 pm
1990 – water broke, went to hospital, baby was breach, born via c-section. From home to birth, 3
1/2 hrs, no labor pains! Piece of cake!! After surgery pain was minimal; milk “came in” – worst
part of entire pregnancy!
My mom had three children within a nine year time span (’59, ‘62, ‘68). Her first, her ankles and wrists were strapped to table, legs straight – no
stirrups – no drugs, my brother was over 8 lbs,
birthed by a 120 lb woman. She said it was excrutiating and I have no doubts. Surprised she ever let my dad touch her again. The next two, she
was knocked out, woke up after it was all over.
motherjanegoose
September 18th, 2009
5:50 pm
@ Kris…wow…I thought the milk coming in part WAS a piece of cake compared to being in labor for so long. Childbirth is so different from woman to woman.
D B M
September 18th, 2009
7:09 pm
I was shaved and given an enema in 1981 at the high risk clinic at Crawford Long Hospital ( now Emory Midtown) It was truly horrible, and I told the nurse I could not hold any more , ran to the bathroom and soiled the floor . As I suffered in labor in the bathroom for 30 minutes, I could hear the nurse cursing me outside the door !!!! She deserved to have to clean the mess !!!!
lakerat
September 18th, 2009
8:46 pm
The lakerat that posted at 2:00 and 2:02 is an imposter.
Faye
September 18th, 2009
8:49 pm
First baby was born in 1987 – over 36 hours in labor (hardest labor lasted about 12 hours – pushed for just over 3) – had her in a Naval hospital, no drugs whatsoever – not even for the episiotomy . No shaving, no enema (two things I was nervous about, surprisingly). Because I had an internal fetal monitor, I labored on my back – not really efficient, and because I was afraid to “go” on the table (no one told me that might happen), I didn’t push very efficiently, either. I had to walk to go get her from the nursery to nurse her just a couple hours after giving birth – they were hardcore!
My son was born three years later at good old Kennestone – because my labor was so long with my daughter, and I had read a lot about better labor practices, I tried to stay home as long as possible – well, I almost stayed home TOO long! I was in transition, and was having back labor – I was in so much pain, I asked my husband to take me to the hospital just so I could get some drugs – I thought I was still hours from having the baby. My son was delivered within 10 minutes of our signing in! I never did get any drugs, and I ended up tearing, no episiotomy – the stitches weren’t too bad, though. They brought me my baby :-)
For the record, I talked to my mom who had 4 deliveries in the 60s, and she said Betty Draper’s experiences was pretty dead on as far as the fog, the confusion, the drifting in and out, the awakening with a “new bundle of joy” in her arms – my mom didn’t have hallucinations of her dead father mopping the floor, though! My mom also went to a small hospital where the nurses were great. My dad not being there wasn’t weird because dads weren’t expected to do that then. Strange story with my birth – she was so out of it time-wise, she couldn’t figure out why they were serving her roast beef for breakfast – I was born at 4:18 PM – she thought it was 4:18 AM. She lost an entire 12 hours!
JATL
September 18th, 2009
11:33 pm
My mom always had horror stories of giving birth to me in 1970. They didn’t strap her into the stirrups, but several of her friends experienced that. She was given twilight sleep which ultimately led to an allergic reaction and messed up her thyroid. She didn’t necessarily hallucinate, but she said she was in a crazy fog and saying strange things. She kind of remembers (and was told later by him) telling the doctor that he should just hurry up so they could go plant oak trees in his front yard. She was in labor for 36 hours, and her regular doctor said he would have given her a c-section, but the ancient old-school doctor on call and in town then didn’t want to do one, so we both suffered. She never fully dilated and I was basically dragged out in stirrups. She was shaved and given an enema at the beginning -and my dad was shuffled off to the waiting room for the entire time. When she finally came to and the fog cleared, they brought me to her, and she didn’t even believe I was hers because she was used to bald and blonde babies, and I was huge with black hair and black eyes.
When I had my two, I enjoyed a Nudane narcotic drip and an epidural that actually worked with the second. The first baby epidural did not work very well and I had intense back labor -total labor was 14 hours. Second time around -I was zonked on Nudane and the epidural for most of it. Was in REAL labor for about 9 hours, but given the fabulous epi, I slept until I was awoken and told to push -two pushes and he was out! Say what you want natural childbirth folks, but it was a FANTASTIC way to have a baby through the miracle of modern science! Both of my babies scored 9s on their APGARs (I don’t think this is THAT meaningful, but the natural nazi types -not ALL of you -just some -refuse to believe the drugs don’t dull them, and they obviously weren’t dull). I truly suffered with my first for hours before the epidural and then it didn’t work very well, so I kept suffering, but it seemed much better since at least it got rid of my back labor. I was positively ecstatic when the 2nd baby epidural worked!
Faye
September 19th, 2009
1:14 am
JATL – I envy you (and all my friends who got epis) – I didn’t want to sound like I was hardcore no-drugs – I wanted them; I just wasn’t given them! The Naval hospital didn’t give them unless you were having a C-section, and I got to the hospital too late to have them with my son! Those breathing exercises were for the birds, lol!
JATL
September 19th, 2009
9:04 am
I didn’t think you didn’t want drugs Faye. It sounded like you would have loved to have them! I’m sorry you had such a rough first experience. The women I’m talking about are kind of like (and often the same as) the breast-feeding nazis. Many women advocate and have natural childbirth and breastfeed forever, and that’s great, but there is that special little group who are zealots and think you’re horrible if you use drugs during childbirth or don’t solely breastfeed until the kid is 1 or 2. Their whole attitude really rankles me.
JATL
September 19th, 2009
9:26 am
New Stepmom -just listen to your husband regarding the birth watching. I do know some men who have been completely grossed out by it all, but most are not. I think most are able to separate what is happening in the delivery room and what happens in the bedroom. I was also very concerned about it because I worked with a guy who was hung up on it 10 years after his only child was born. My husband really wasn’t bothered. During our first birth, I made him stay up by my head, but at the very end he was suddenly “down there” -and I was so preoccupied and in pain I really didn’t care what was happening at that point. He watched the entire 2nd time primarily “down there” and I have to fight him off 1/2 the time because I’m not into sex twice a day! So, it really varies from man to man-and I think from experience. Face it -some births are more graphic and involve more blood, water, etc. than others. Just come to an agreement that you both are comfortable with.
Faye
September 19th, 2009
10:14 am
Gotcha, JATL – I am definitely NOT one of those folks! When my daughter has babies (not for several years, I hope) I’m going to recommend that she get at least an epidural – everyone I know who had one seems to have enjoyed the experience so much more. One nice thing about both my labors was that I had beautiful healthy kids with no complications! That made it all worth it :-)
motherjanegoose
September 20th, 2009
1:56 pm
Enter your comments here
JDJ
September 20th, 2009
11:47 pm
July 4th, 1969, I stood at my window in Piedmont Hosp. early in the morning and watched the very first Peachtree Road Race trundle by . . . couple a hundred runners and that was it. Had already endured the shave/enema trauma and was soon to be induce with Pitocin; later I got whatever it was (not Twilight) and didn’t wake up until after 7 that night — they brought me my beautiful baby girl and I was ecstatic and sleepy. Can’t say I miss anything — was never in any great pain, just about what would be hard cramps. No complaints from me or hubby — that’s just how it was.
Oh Shut Up Please
September 21st, 2009
12:15 am
@Please, well opinions are like *ssholes– everyone has one. You are not “entitled” to be taken seriously or to have your opinion respected. That kind of has to be earned.
The answer to your question “How could a man write about childbirth?” is very simple: imagination and empathy. Of which you clearly have neither.
Please
September 21st, 2009
5:12 pm
@ Shut Up Please – I did shut up or didn’t you notice. Idiot
Birthing trends: 'Mad Men' explores the horrors of giving birth in … | End Cigarettes Smoking Now!
October 6th, 2009
4:06 am
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