Did you buy EVERYTHING on the school supply list?
Did you buy everything on the school supply list this year? Do you think your school’s list is unreasonable? Is it optional (yet requested)? Do you still pay a school supply fee when they kids start school?
I always buy all the supplies that school requests. I am happy to buy whatever my children need. And I don’t even mind sending in some extra to help others who can’t afford to buy everything on the list. However, I’m still trying to figure out where in the heck the $10 school supply charge on the Gwinnett County form is going to. I happily pay the technology fee, the nurses’ fee, the PTA fees … but the supply charge baffles me when our list is so long.
I spent around $100 (not including a new backpack for Rose) this year to buy the optional/yet requested school supplies for my first and third grader. I am amazed at how different the school supply lists can be even within Gwinnett County. A good friend teaches first grade at a Gwinnett school of similar financial make-up and she is only requesting five items. Here are my kids’ lists for this year:
Third-grade supply list
1 ½ inch white binder with view and pockets – office supply stores
have them
NO TRAPPER KEEPERS PLEASE
3 plastic pocket folders with 3 brads
2 large pack WIDERULED notebook paper – 200 sheets
1 -2 reams of copy paper
3 MEAD (black & white) bound composition books
4 dry erase markers (BROAD TIP EXPO only)
4 standard size glue sticks
1 SOFT pencil case with clear view and zipper
2 – 12 pack #2 sharpened pencils
1 pack colored pencils
1 box of crayons 16 count
Fine tip black sharpie markers
1 highlighter
1 box of Kleenex
2 bottles of Waterless Hand Sanitizer
1 roll of paper towels
1 box of anti bacterial wipes (no Clorox please)
water bottle that will CLOSE
1 dark sock (from home) for dry erase boards
BOYS
1 ream of colored copy paper
Clear sheet protectors
GIRLS
1 box of quart size baggie
2 packs index cards 3×5 unlined
colored sharpies (just one or two)
First grade list
The following items are optional supplies to help your child prepare and organize assignments:
1 sturdy plastic school box for desk supplies
1 package of pencil tip erasers
24 #2 pencils sharpened
1 pair of Fiskar Brand scissors
12 white glue sticks
1 box of 24 crayons
1 package of washable markers (8 in a pack)
1 box of 200 ct. facial tissues
1 roll of paper towels
1 container of baby wipes (No wipes containing bleach)
1 box of Ziploc bags – quart size
2 Mead composition books
1 four pack fat dry erase markers (black, red, green, blue)
1 bottle of hand sanitizer
1 package of plain white copy paper
2 fat yellow highlighters
Obviously a lot of families are struggling now, and it would be hard for them to buy everything on the list. Jennifer Brett reported earlier in July that agencies that help provide school supplies are seeing a huge increase in requests.
“At Give a Kid a Chance’s first back-to-school drive four years ago, volunteers outfitted 100 youngsters. The following year’s drive served 1,000 and the group expects at least 2,500 this year.”
” ‘We’re seeing a lot of people who have never had to ask for help before,’ said volunteer Nancy Bowling. …”
Who should provide the supplies if the parents feel they can’t? Get Schooled blogger asked this question just the other day and many of the teachers on the blog were adamant that they were NOT paying for the supplies this year – especially in light of the furloughs. Here’s the link to check out that alternative view of this conversation.
So, how much of the supply list did you buy? How many items did they request? Is my list big?
What about that school supply fee on the county forms? Do you pay that too?
Who should buy the supplies if the parents feel like they are unable? Do you like it when the school buys in bulk and you just pay the PTA like a $35 fee for the supplies (discussed in the Get Schooled conversation)? My friend’s school does that and she feels very pressured to buy the PTA box. She doesn’t like it.
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50 comments Add your comment
DB
August 5th, 2009
7:37 am
My “back-to-school” list was very different this year, and included things like TV’s, refrigerators and bed linens!! At our private school, for the elementary grades, you just paid a fee (don’t think it was the PTA), and school supplies were sitting on your child’s desk the first day of class. In middle school and even high school, my kids always loved shopping for school supplies — picking out the different colors of notebooks, choosing just the right highlighter, mulling over the pros and cons of mechanical pencils vs. “regular” pencils, etc. However, the only “extra” stuff we were ever asked to provide were boxes of tissues. A “wish list” would be circulated with craft items, etc., and people would contribute to that as they were able. Keep in mind, though, that I was paying for all the other stuff one way or another, either as a fee or through tuition :-) It was the nickle-and-diming that we hated, and I have to admit, the school did a pretty good job of keeping additional costs at a minimum. Tuition included everything, including field trip costs, and, at our school, also included lunch (breakfast was available, but at an a la carte price.)
I am a bit bemused at your list, Theresa — how in the heck does buying a teacher a roll of paper towels and a ream of copier paper contribute to your child being “organized”? I read the “Get Schooled” blog on this topic last week, and was surprised at the scolding some teachers got for declaring that they could no longer afford to pay for kids who showed up empty-handed. They were accused of being mean-spirited and their true desire for teaching was even questioned, if they could not find it in their hearts to “help” those kids. I have to admit, I cannot fathom expecting a teacher to make up my own shortcomings, and wondered what these same people would say if their employers suddenly required everyone to provide their own copy paper and pens. Most of the teacher resentment seemed to be directed at families who appeared to be making decisions to spend money on what teachers considered luxuries (i.e., designer clothing or expensive cars), while expecting teachers, who drove clunkers and wore non-designer duds, to pick up their slack.
Andrea
August 5th, 2009
8:09 am
I have a 3rd grader this year and I can say I did not buy everything on the list as I thought it was excessive. I am an avid supply shopper and most of the school supplies for this year, I purchased last year (on clearance). I always try to buy supplies during the year, especially when they are on sale. I think the only new things I bought this year was a book bag and 2 new binders.
While I do think the lists are excessive, but I also see the other side from the educator’s perspective. I generally try to spend $20 per child to solely buy things on the teacher’s “Wish List”. I usually end up buying boxes of tissue, hand sanitizer, dry erase cleaner and markers, etc. I do send extra classroom supplies for those children who may not have any. The system has worked well. I also always volunteer to make the copies for the teachers. I really can’t believe the copier constraints the teachers are subjected to. Our office printer contract gives us unlimited black and white copies, so I copy the materials for the teacher for the year. My employer donated one box of paper to each of my kids’ teachers, so I don’t send reams of paper.
Patrick
August 5th, 2009
8:32 am
I remember when I worked at Wal-Mart in Covington back in 1998 right after I got out of high school, the parents were beginning to put back to school items on Lay-Away. One of the parents showed me the list for Kindergarten, and the one supply that stood out was “bag of rice.” What, are parents buying stuff for the school cafeteria now? I imagine next they’d be asking for “box of plastic forks (30 count or higher)” or “plastic Solo or Hefty cups, 12-oz.”. The parent explained that it was for arts-and-crafts projects done in Kindergarten. Has anyone else seen this?
As for buying school supplies early, I remember doing that when I’d visit my grandparents in Alabama. My granddad would take me to Big Lots, and let me pick out some school supplies. Not knowing what the list required, I’d get the basics: notebooks, notebook paper, pens, pencils, folders, divider tabs, binder or Trapper Keeper, and a couple other things. Once we got the supply lists a month later, my parents would have to get maybe a third of the list, since I’d already taken care of the major stuff.
We never had to buy anything for the teacher. I think the only thing we had to buy for the classroom was Kleenix. Most students brought in a single box; while others might have brought in the 3-box pack. If we bought arts and crafts supplies (scissors, glue, construction paper), it was usually for our own use. We may have had to turn in the construction paper, I don’t remember. We never had to purchase chalk, overhead projector pens, sharpies, dry erase board markers and erasers, or anything else of that nature for the teacher. Either the teachers bought them themselves, or else the school furnished them.
Michelle
August 5th, 2009
8:40 am
I don’t think the lists are excessive. Theresa, my little guy’s supply list is very similar to your first grade list. When we have a little extra money, I contribute extra. Sometimes throughout the year I will take little things in for the teacher/class to help out.
When I lived in Indiana, we actually had to “pay” to go to school. There was always a fee associated and it escalated as the grades got higher (i.e. science classes, etc.)
It was very weird for me coming to Georgia and just enrolling the kids! I thought maybe we got billed later or something along those lines…
parent and teacher
August 5th, 2009
8:45 am
My county does not charge a supply fee, and at my middle school, we were told SPECIFICALLY not to ask for copy paper.
Zachs Mom
August 5th, 2009
8:56 am
Even if you bought everything on the list, how much would you be spending? $50-60 dollars? The back pack thant my 9th grader picked out cost almost than that. So did the socks and underware I got him. He had to wait on the shoes he really wanted because I couldn’t afford the backback AND the shoes. Its all about budget, and choice. He is going to do some extra chores for his Grandparents to earn the money.
I don’t mind buying what my child needs and even some of the things he wants but it is not my job or my responsibility to buy for your kids. I used to hate it in elementary school when the teacher said not to put your childs name on anything because it all went in to the “common pot” for everyone to use and then he would come home and say that he didn’t have (fill in the blank) to use when I KNOW THAT I SENT ONE IN!
We also used to get the field trip request forms that said “no child would be denied the RIGHT to go because they could not afford to pay” Since when is going on a field trip a RIGHT? If you can’t pay, you don’t go. Do you walk into a movie and not pay because it is your rright to be able to see it? Needless to say, a lot of field trips didn’t happen.
If parents honestly can not pay for something, maybe the school should have a barter system. The PTA will supply (fill in the blank) and the parent will cut the grass out front, wash the windows, scrub the floors be the lunch room monitor or other things that the school needs done. I bet that almost all parents would find a way to pay for supplies.
My biggest concern about the new school year is that Zachary is going to have to get up at 6 am to get the bus at 6:30. Its a good thing that he can buy (or take) breakfast once he gets there.
Becky
August 5th, 2009
9:15 am
Zachs Mom, that is why I don’t like to send stuff in all at once..I bought for my grandkids (twins) when they started kindergarten..I bought everything that was on the list..Then 3 months after they started school, their Dad got another job in a different county..They were told that none of the supplies that were sent in, could be given back because of the “commuiity pot”..Neither could any of the on account money that had been put on their account for ice cream on Friday after lunch..
I don’t mind helping other kids, because I know what is was like to not have all of the supplies that were needed, BUT, I don’t expect to have to buy for all of the kids..So, now I buy a little at a time and send it in, as well as putting my grandchilds name on everything that I send in..I don’t care if they don’t want this or not…
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
August 5th, 2009
9:22 am
Becky — My friend told me to write in black marker on each item — and they would be returned. She got a whole bunch of stuff back from our second grade class last year and I got zippo because I didn’t write on the items themselves. HMM — that it was kind of tacky before to brand your stuff but this year with times being tough, maybe not …. Where’s my Sharpie???
Patrick — as soon as you wrote rice I knew it was arts and crafts or math in later grades — for weights — The k asks for teddy grahms (sp) and all kinds of items like that the kids count.
cups have all kinds of uses. and plates too — they do some pretty creative stuff with everyday items –
FCM
August 5th, 2009
9:35 am
No, nor are several parents I know planning to buy them all. Handsoap and paper towels should have been budgeted into school cost.
This year was the first year the list said ’suggested NOT mandatory” with bold and underlines on it.
I did buy the basics: pencils, paper, glue etc
I am ticked that they require specific colors of folders, why not let the kids have some choice on this one item? Oh yeah, we have to homoginize it all so every feels ok that Susie doesn’t have a designer folder. I feel the teachers will defend this by saying it is easier to look for all the red folders for homework….Seriously people it takes 3 seconds longer and would mean SO much to us parents and kids to feel we get some fun in school….School is not at all like I remembering it, learning is a CHORE not FUN.
Becky
August 5th, 2009
10:12 am
FCM, I remember in 7th grade (many, many moons ago) I had a science notebook that had purple paper..We had to trun them in once and my teacher gave me a F on this project..When my Mother questioned him about why I had gotten a failing grade he told her it was because I didn’t turn it in..She pointed to his desk and wanted to know why my book was there, he had no answer..When he refused to give me a grade on it, she took it to the Principals office, where the teacher told that because it was on paper other than white, he would not grade it..Needless to say, before my Mother left there, I had a grade and an apology from the teacher..
Oneproudmama
August 5th, 2009
10:45 am
I don’t usually post here, but read daily. My son is in 3rd grade at a private school. His list was very reasonable. Mostly just the basics except for hand sanitizer and kleenex. His teacher did not request certain colors of folders, but did request that that they have 2 pockets and be a solid color. His teacher does have a wish list that we will help out with when we can. I don’t mind helping out with the “classroom” needs. My SIL teaches kindergarten and spends a lot of her own personal money each year. They shouldn’t have to. The parents really shouldn’t have to. The state and county should be supplying these things.
JJ
August 5th, 2009
10:51 am
I did the first couple of years….then I realized if every parent adhered to the list, I could NOT send in a few things here and there, like the paper towels, hand sanitizer & kleenex.
However, I always sent in extra copy paper. I know the teachers really need this. I usually sent in two to three reams a year.
I remember the first day of Kindergarten and my poor daughter, along with all the other kids at the bus stop, were so loaded down with supplies. It was killing them to lug all that stuff, get on the bus and keep up with everything. Once she started first grade, we staggered the delivery of school supplies during the first week.
I always contributed money too. I don’t think the teachers should be paying for anything. They don’t get paid enough anyway. I agree with the other posters, the school district needs to budget this in.
I did give Gift Certificates to ABC School Supply (I think that was the name) at the end of the year, and the teachers LOVED them!!!
Katie
August 5th, 2009
11:03 am
Theresa – On the 1st grade supply list this year, it says at the bottom to label each item with the kids name. I haven’t done it yet, but am going to before tomorrow :)
Katie
Michelle
August 5th, 2009
11:09 am
My school had some items that were to be labeled with the child’s name, and others that were for the classroom! Isn’t it strange how all of the classrooms and teachers are different?!
We actually go to register for school tomorrow at which time we will drop off the little guy’s supplies and look at the “school store” while we’re there. My little guy does like to have some of the supplies that say the school name or are “special”, like an american flag pencil, etc.
I can’t wait to meet his teachers. I’m a little nervous. Last year was ROUGH!!
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
August 5th, 2009
11:12 am
Hey We had a little breaking news — Atlanta ranks 31 out of 50 for working mothers by Forbes magazine — Check out the full story and list on the top blog — Here’s the link —
http://blogs.ajc.com/momania/2009/08/05/atlanta-ranks-31-out-of-50-for-working-mothers/
Patrick
August 5th, 2009
12:27 pm
You should be suspicious of any school that instructs you to NOT put your child’s name on the supplies, as they will have to surrender them to the teacher, and said supplies will be redistributed. This is yet another way of teaching children that having more of something than others is wrong, and that socialist communism is right. If you cannot afford everything, expect those who can, to provide for you. The only time I experienced this was in 2nd grade. Everyone had to bring in two packs of notebook paper, which the teacher collected, and handed out as needed. The only way I could see this being beneficial to everybody is that the distribution of the paper was controlled by the teacher, and no student took too much or didn’t have enough to do the assignment, depending on how big (or little) they wrote, and no paper was wasted on paper airplanes, or drawing, or anything else. However, if the student (or rather their parents) bought the paper, they should be allowed to do what they want with it. If they need more, they can borrow from another student, as long as they give that amount back, and they can ask their parents to buy more when needed.
What would be convenient for both teachers and students, and I think some may do this, is if they are required to have arts and crafts supplies (markers, crayons, glue, scissors, etc.), to place them in a box, and have the box labelled with the child’s name. The teacher can collect up the boxes and place them in a cabinet, which will be given back to the students when the time arises for those supplies to be used. If a child wants to use them at any other time, he or she would have to ask the teacher for their supply box, and the teacher can fetch it for them. As for pens, pencils, and anything they’d use daily, keep it in a pencil pouch, preferably one that can be placed in a 3-ring binder.
Also, every school I went to had a supply “store”, where you could purchase supplies that you ran out of in the middle of the week, or you forgot to bring with you, like a pen or pencil, notebook paper, a notebook, or anything else. The prices were usually a bit higher than if you bought the same supplies at the grocery store, but (1) it benefitted the school directly, and (2) it was convenient for an emergency. I can’t count the number of times I had to buy an emergency pack of paper or a pencil because I forgot to tell my parents when I was running low, and end up running out before the end of the school week.
mom3
August 5th, 2009
12:28 pm
The whole ‘community property’ part of the school supplies is what really gets on my last nerve. I don’t mind buying what my kids needs, but I am not going to supply for kids that don’t bring in their stuff. Most of these kids parents can afford the items, they just know there is no real need to spend the money because the rest of the suckers are supplying enough for everyone. There aren’t that many poor families in our area and if they really need help, there are plenty of charitable organizations out there that will help them.
On another note, I am sooooo sick of the teachers whining about their 3 day furlough. Do they have any idea what those of us in the private sector have been dealing with for the last 4 years? 1 in 10 workers is without a job. Most of us haven’t gotten a merit increase in a couple of years, and a lot have been forced to work a reduced shift. You at least have a guaranteed job with good benefits. You should be thankful for that. Instead you all sound like you are either spoiled, or have no understanding of how deep this recession actually is.
MyOpinion
August 5th, 2009
12:32 pm
I think the list should be a two part list. The first part should be the necessary items for your child and the second part should consist of the wanted items for the classroom. This way parents can be sure they purchase the necessary items for their child, while if any money is left within their budget, they can purchase the wanted items for the classroom.
lwa
August 5th, 2009
1:29 pm
I typically buy everything on the list at one time and that is all I purshase by way of supplies. I am torn on the “community items.” If a child does not have what they need in the class room, then I assume, yes assume, that they might not have all they need at home, so why not make sure that they have the basics in at least one environment. Is this my problem that they don’t have it? Not now, but it matter later in life.
Now, I don’t pay PTA dues, year book, class fees and all that other stuff at the beginning of the year. I spread it out. The cost tend to add up…. BTW, I no longer buy year books. Only for the Sr. year of school. No one opens them up.
MomsRule
August 5th, 2009
2:41 pm
I no longer buy everything on the list. I gave that up years ago. I have always labeled everything even when the lists said not to label with the childs name. “I bought them, they are for my kid, they get his name assigned to them.” And they are for his use.
I do not send everything to school at once. Like others have stated, “it is not my responsiblity to make sure every child in the classroom has a pencil.” Parents need to step up and provide for their children and teachers need to get their “requests” under control. I think it is very pushy to ask for items via “donations” and then specify the specific brands you want and don’t want. Seriously? Well if you want the “xxx” brand tissues – then buy them yourself.
I prefer to teach my children personal responsibility. I help them get ready for the first day of school. I purchase what they need and help them distribute the supplies between what needs to be at school to get started and what needs to go in the kitchen cupboard to be used throughout the year.
It is their responsiblity to replenish their pencils, paper, notebooks, etc. as they need them throughout the school year. It is my responsibiliy to make sure we have extras in the cupboard.
I also think most (I’m not saying all) of the Moms sending in absolutely everything on the list are dong it to score points with the teachers. It has nothing to do with helping out the “less fortunate” as they like to claim. I’ve witnessed these Moms making big dramatic productions while dragging every item (one at a time) out of their big shopping bags to show the teacher what “They and little Susie are bringing to the classroom.”
HB
August 5th, 2009
3:16 pm
“Well if you want the “xxx” brand tissues – then buy them yourself.”
Is this teacher really specifying a brand, though, or just referring to tissues in general as “Kleenex”? In the South, more than in other areas of the country, people tend to adopt brand names as the object name, even if it’s made by another company. I rarely heard the words tissue, bleach, or soda growing up, but rather Kleenex, Clorox, and Coke (as in “What kind of Coke do you want?” and the answer could be “Sprite”).
FCM
August 5th, 2009
3:19 pm
I do that too….I send things in through out the year…
What I do not get is that big list PLUS the ‘wish list’ items that are in every classroom or on slips for you to help the class out.
I HATE HATE HATE community pot I have been the mom who could not afford something…and was THANKFUL when one lady at the school bought my child a pair of shoes….I would gladly adopt a single child and help with part of their school needs…but no 1st grader needs 4 boxes of 24 crayons!
JJ
August 5th, 2009
4:11 pm
Hey FCM, wanna adopt my college student???? I’ll be happy to send you her school needs…..LOL…..sheets, comforter, etc…….just kidding, but that made me laugh..
QQ
August 5th, 2009
5:02 pm
How much money we are talking about spending on school supplies? Seriously – box of crayons – $0.99, box of pencils – $1, pencil case – $2-3. Just buy 1-2 outfits less a year or do not go out for 1 dinner or a movie and you will have money for school supplies. This is the only country in the world where “poor” people have TVs, cell phones, full closet of clothes and then they cry that they cannot afford to buy school supplies.
And i also do not understand why parents NEED to buy sheets, towels, comforters, storage containers, etc for kids that do go to college. Just another marketing influence. We sent 3 kids to college and all of them just packed things that we already had at home (towels, storage containers, sheets, even beds). I rather buy them something new once they are out of college. I understand some of kids may want to have new things, but it is a “want” and not a “need”.
FCM
August 5th, 2009
5:09 pm
JJ– I said ‘part of’ their school needs…..she need a thermos? HEHEEHE Just Kidding.
Denise
August 5th, 2009
5:40 pm
My nephews’ lists are pretty extensive. The only things that have us scratching our heads are the multiple boxes of crayons, 4 boxes of ziploc bags, and a boat load of paper towels and napkins. I’d never send a kid to school on day one with 4 boxes of crayons. In that specific case, if it is about someone not having any, teach the kids to share. I don’t mind the community items like paper because each child benefits from it.
Oh, and I help pay for their school supplies so it is personal to me.
MomsRule
August 5th, 2009
7:46 pm
HB and FCM, I know what both of you are saying about brands and yes that does happen but that’s not what I’m referring to…tissues wasn’t the best example I could have used. I’ve received lists that specify hand soap for example…down to the brand and scent preferances. Yes, I think that is extreme. Or pink Post It notes ONLY. — yes, I’m certain my boys are getting a lot of use out of Pink Post it notes. I haven’t seen an assignment that required a Post It note yet.
FCM – I 100% agree with your last paragraph about adopting a child that needs things. THAT I’m all over!
QQ – I’ve spent over $200 on school supplies this year so far. Lists don’t involve 99cent boxes of crayons anymore. That’s the point. This price was for two boys, 5th and 8th grades. And again, I did not buy everything on this list. This only included 1 new backpack and does not include any new clothes, shoes, etc. And I am not complaining. I’m more than happy to purchase everything my children need. But I’m just not convinced that my 10 year old is going to go through 400 index cards in the 5th grade. I’m sure they will get as much use as the $40 calculator still sitting in its original packaging in my cupboard that was a requirement on my then 7th graders list a year ago.
Denise, in my area, the paper towel requests are because the teachers don’t like the ones the school provides. That’s what a teacher told me a few years back. So we go back to my opinion that the teachers are out of control. If I don’t like the pens my employer provides. I bring my own. I don’t expect them to cater their office supply buying to my personal preference.
Back To School | All Days Long
August 6th, 2009
3:52 am
[...] Did you buy EVERYTHING on the school supply list? | A Blog for … By Theresa Walsh Giarrusso My “back-to-school” list was very different this year, and included things like TV's, refrigerators and bed linens!! At our private school, for the elementary grades, you just paid a fee (don't think it was the PTA), and school supplies … A Blog for Busy Moms – MOMania – http://blogs.ajc.com/momania/ [...]
motherjanegoose
August 6th, 2009
7:58 am
QQ…we had to buy new sheets for college as the bed was an extra long twin bunk and we had Queens here.
If you are not in Atlanta, you may not realize how uppity folks can be and how the mommas think this is yet another contest to show prowess.
RE: brands….I do agree that asking for a certain kind of Kleenex is ridiculous but there may be merit in the glue sitcks or markers as they may last longer.
RE: furlough days…yes, I am down about $3000 this summer, due to budget cuts but am up the rest of the year. Those of us who are self employed know what hustling is about. Y’all know I love teachers.
Becky
August 6th, 2009
11:07 am
The list for the twins for Kindergarten, I bought everything that was on the list and I spent just under $200.00..As I mentioned before, when the kids left that school after about 3 months, I didn’t get any of it back..
QQ, I do agree with you about buying everything new for them..Why? Be more selective about what they really need that has to be bought brand new vs. used..
I have a question for all of the Mom’s and Dad’s that have kids going off to college..I have a coworker that is taking off 3 days to get her daughter back to college..She is only 3 hours from home and put most of her stuff in a storage unit last year..This year, she’s moving into an apt. off campus and there will be 3 people moving her into her new place.. Is this normal? I’ve moved out of an intire house and into another one in less time than that..
Becky
August 6th, 2009
12:36 pm
OOPS..entire house..
QQ
August 6th, 2009
1:03 pm
Hi Becky,
That would not be normal for me or our family. 3 days to move a college age kid to an apartment? Personally, i would cut the cord and let my child to handle the move on its own, let alone give up 3 working days. You are 18 – how long mommy or daddy will hold your hand?
Becky
August 6th, 2009
1:36 pm
QQ, thats what I was thinking..The kid is 19 and her Mom still makes her Dr. appts., still researches homework projects for her..Heck, she talks to the daughter about 6-7 times a day and half of that is in baby talk..No, there isn’t anything “wrong” with the girl, just ?? I don’t know..Of course, the Mom talks to her Mom about 15-20 times per day while at work..They live in the same house for Christ sakes..Then of course, you have the Mom (coworker) that also calls home to talk either talk to the dog and cat or to ask her Mom what are they doing…Am I the only one that thinks this is way beyond strange?
QQ
August 6th, 2009
1:38 pm
I was teaching 1-4 grades in Europe and my list would be:
1. Items your child should have every day: pencils, note book, etc.
2. Items parents should purchase for craft lessons: water colors, colored paper, etc. Note, kids would be told a day before what to bring to class for a particular craft lesson.
3. Small charge (45-10) every 3 months for “class” items. I was working in a non-traditional school and i used this money to develop additional educational materials. One year we (kids and I) even re-painted entire classroom. We would work during craft lessons and after school. I know people would not like this idea in US, but kids had a lot of fun and gained life experience painting their favorite characters on the classroom walls.
Kids would have to learn how to come to school on time and be prepared for a class. If a child did not have an item that he/she needed for a class, a teacher would send a note home and a child would have to obtain parent’s signature. 3 notes would result in a phone call to parents. This would be applicable all the way through high school. All kids would be graded on their performance almost every day, preparation for lessons and behavior including and parent would have to sign the grade book every week.
And believe me – kids AND parents would respect teachers. When i came to this country, i was shocked by kids behavior. I don’t know how teachers can teach here. My friend is an assistant teacher and she was yield at because she asked a kid to pick up paper cuts from a floor. Mom plainly said to her in from of a kid: how do you dare to make him work a manual job – he has a nanny at home for that! Seriously?
Becky
August 6th, 2009
1:52 pm
QQ, you’re right about kids and parents respecting teachers..How long have you been here? I know that I never would of said or done anything disrespectful toward a teacher..I was afraid of what would happen when I got home…
motherjanegoose
August 6th, 2009
4:31 pm
Becky…my daughter went into her HS today ALL BY HERSELF and paid her Senior dues with a check from her own account. She said that the teacher remarked, ” wow you know how to write your own check?” I told her that I would give her some money back when we go to the bank tomorrow.
Coddling parents drive me INSANE and it sounds like you know one.
DB
August 6th, 2009
4:43 pm
QQ: Three days is WAY too long to move into an apartment three hours away. JMHO, but it takes us less than three hours to help my son move — i.e., provide mini-van, dump stuff in living space, buy him lunch, and head home. What he sets up and how he sets it up is his problem/fun/decision. We’ll have a couple of hours to move my daughter into her dorm next week, as it is an off-period, she will be in workshops all morning, we don’t have access to the dorm until 2 pm, and I do not want to be one of those parents who is the last to leave at 11 pm!!! But she is very organized — she knows exactly what will go where. She sitting in her room right now, sorting out which t-shirts she wants to take — last question: “Is 25 t-shirts too many?”
Becky
August 6th, 2009
4:46 pm
motherjanegoose..You don’t even know the half of it here on this end..I could go on and on about the coddling..You would probably go crazy working with her..I just (most of the time) ignore her..
Becky
August 6th, 2009
4:48 pm
DB, I ask her why was it taking so long to move her in and she said that they will be having to wait why all of the other kids are also moving things in..Either way, I think that is waaaay to long to move someone into a dorm…
DB
August 7th, 2009
12:38 am
Sorry, Becky, I didn’t track the original question back to your post! Her excuse is pure bullshite. Yes, there will be other families there. And they will ALL manage to get in. Yes, it will be hectic. But there is no way on God’s green earth it would take THREE WHOLE DAYS. Sounds like she’s fitting in a little mini-vacation, and hoping that you guys don’t know the difference. But the number of phone calls would drive me batty — good lord, there is NO ONE I need to speak to that often, including my husband!
QQ: You’re right, there is no “need” — except for the bedding, which are XL, and we don’t have any XL twin beds in our house. And yes, she did need some clothes — after 13 years of a uniform plaid skirts and navy blue kneesocks, she really IS short on fall clothes! She doesn’t “need” a T.V., or a microwave, or gauzy teal curtains, or a big bed pillow. She doesn’t need a small bookcase — she could just pile ‘em on the floor. But we had fun shopping for these things, getting great deals and shopping in unexpected places. And, if she’s anything like her mother, 15 years from now, she’ll still have those sheets and towels we bought her!
FCM
August 7th, 2009
8:54 am
Went to open house yesterday. Every desk in 1st grade had pencils, crayons, etc that were on the list (4 boxes of crayons per student plus they each have one on the desk??????)…there were lots of bags (maybe 12-15) of the ‘required’ supplies sitting there too.
I told the teacher that seeing as she had the supplies, I would send in what I bought in a small dose to supplement my child. Once things settled down in October, she could get stock of what she really still needed and let me know. I would send things in then because I know nobody needs to start the year stocking 20 bottles of hand soap. She smiled and asked would I mind take something from the wish list then…what do you know masking tape, Skittles (WTH???), puzzles…..YES I did take something.
We are doing the same for older child’s class too.
On a positive note, they are asking if we want to opt out of those Thursday Folder papers. At least a couple of teachers said “Ms FCM did you hear, we thought of you.” Embarassing my kids I did a happy dance in the hallway and said “Sign me up!”
Patrick
August 7th, 2009
12:01 pm
Becky:
I remember when I moved out of my parents’ home to move in and take care of my grandmother, I did all the moving on my own. Granted, I didn’t take any furniture with me, since she had furniture already for me to use. When I moved out of her house a couple of years later (when she was able to care for herself again), neither she nor my parents came to help me with the moving. The only ones that helped my roommate and I move were her younger brother and a friend of his. Her parents didn’t help either. After one trip in my pickup, we made a beeline to the U-Haul place and rented a truck. Went back to my grandma’s house, got the rest of my stuff, went to roommate’s parents’ house, got her stuff, then went to the public storage where we both had some stuff.
When she moved out of the apartment, and I a month later, I had no help whatsoever with getting my stuff out. It took an entire weekend and 7 or 8 trips using my pickup truck to haul stuff from the apartment to the duplex. I also had some stuff in a public storage near work, so a couple of trips were made there as well.
When I moved out of there into my grandmother’s house (different house than before) after she passed away, I had very little help there. My parents didn’t come to the duplex to help me move out, but once or twice my dad came over to the house to help me move in. Since he has a bad back, he was only able to lift lightweight items like small boxes, some kitchen gadgets I didn’t pack up, small electronics, and a couple of paintings. I had to do everything else.
The only time I had help moving was when I moved back in with my parents a couple years ago. My dad would go over to the house and pick up whatever boxes I had packed, and my mom would go over with him to help with any furniture I planned on taking over there, mainly my computer desk. Everything else was sold in a yard sale.
motherjanegoose
August 7th, 2009
2:25 pm
FCM….take this advise or leave it from a former teacher….sometimes they use Skittle to count, sort and graph. M&M’s can melt and get messy. BUT I could be wrong….
WOW
August 7th, 2009
4:03 pm
Thanks Patrick..Today, she says that they also have to take the daughter grocery shopping..Again, the child is 19, she can’t do this on her on? They have to measure the windows and buy curtains and blinds..Just another form of hand holding and coddling…
KinderTeacher
August 7th, 2009
6:54 pm
As a teacher, I greatly greatly greatly appreciate it when parents do NOT write their child’s name on school supplies. As I work in a very low income area, I have to supplement over 50% the supplies I ask for. 4 boxes of crayons is crazy(I would never ask for that many!) but be aware that, not only would you be graciously donating to a needy child, children lose things! I usually start the year with the 8 pack and by October first, most students have lost the majority of the crayons in their box. Which, of course, means they need another box. Who do you think supplies the next box? I read a parent spent $200 on twins….I easily spend twice as much at the beginning of the year for students who do not bring in any supplies. And then repeat it again throughout the year. My school does not have a strong PTA nor do we sell supplies. I was quite taken aback when I found that our school will not supply anything teacher-ish (white board markers, chart paper, writing paper, staples). While I would never ask a parent to purchase said items since only my hands will touch them, I will have to alter my budget and not provide materials for children who are NOT mine so I can have supplies with which to actually teach.
Just my two cents…
A Kindergarten Teacher
August 7th, 2009
8:03 pm
I am a teacher and a parent so I can see both sides of the supply issue. In defense of teachers I can only suggest that you “walk in my shoes and see what it is like in the classroom.”
In a previous comment the writer stated that she didn’t see why her child needed 4 boxes of 24 crayons. Just how long does she think 24 crayons will last?
Next, I would like to say a big Thank You to the parents in my classroom. Out of 15 families, 10 contributed to a fund my school allows to assist the class with the special ingredients/materials needed to provide a hands on kindergarten experience. You folks are the best, I’m sure this is going to be a great year despite the 3 furloughs and the expected furloughs at the first of the year.
Mark Pennington
August 7th, 2009
8:25 pm
The most important supply? Books! Learn how to match reading levels of texts to reading levels of your students without time-consuming assessments. Also, learn how much independent reading is needed to make grade to grade progress. Check out How to Choose the Right Book.
motherjanegoose
August 9th, 2009
7:10 am
Do WOW and Becky work together or is this the same person? Just wondering….
Patrick
August 11th, 2009
1:39 pm
WOW/Becky: Whoa. Whoa whoa whoa whoa. Back up. She’s 19 and they’re still buying groceries for her? I started buying my own stuff when I worked at my first job at the tender age of 16. Granted, most of it was junk food and snacks, but I did buy the occasional personal hygiene item or school supply. My parents had a fit over the last bit, but they soon realized that this was a great way for me to learn some responsibilty, and develop some independence.
Even after having moved back in with them, I still buy a lot of my own stuff, even though they’ve told me time and again they’ll buy it for me if I need it. “That’s part of the rent you pay us” they said. They’ve eventually given up on the argument and allow me to buy what I need on my own. Some things they’ve bought I will use, like laundry detergent, but I buy my own personal hygiene products and some food I eat there, or at work. I don’t expect them to provide everything for me, since I know they’re not going to be there forever. I can just imagine that girl calling her parents the second her first light or cable bill (or even phone bill) is more than 2 weeks late, and said utilities get cut off, to bail her out and pay the bill, including any reconnection fees. My parents have bailed me out a couple of times, but it was in more serious situations than a late bill. If a bill was late, and the utility was cut off, I learned to not let that happen again, and until the bill was paid, I learned to make do without that utility. I once went five months without phone and Internet. Since at the time I didn’t do as much surfing as I do now, it was doable. Since I received or made maybe one phone call a month, max, I got used to no phone almost instantly.
QQ: I like the idea about having the kids help repaint the classroom. Like you said, it taught them a life skill they’d need when they got older, especially if they ever planned on living in a house of their own. What you didn’t mention that I can see it being beneficial is that the kids would also take more pride in their school, since they’ve been able to contribute to help improving the school. It made them appreciate being at school, and probably more eager to learn. I wish schools here in the U.S. did that with both the teachers and the students. If the parents wouldn’t permit their kids to stay after class, I don’t see how that would prevent them from getting a good grade. Besides, it allowed them to have some input in how the classroom should be decorated, instead of the drab olive green, light brown, pale yellow, or off-white colors oft found in classrooms and hallways.
Pamela
September 11th, 2009
1:10 am
I think that the school supply list has gotten out of hand. My son’s Middle School Reading teacher required 3 folders, 50 sheets of paper, a spiral bound notebook, a 3 ring binder and a composition book just for that class. That is ridiculous! What class needs 6 different notebooks? The list for the other teachers was almost as bad. I had to purchase a total of 18 different notebooks/binders/folders for his classes, not including pens, pencils, calcualtor, colored pencils, index cards, ruler, compass, protractor, highlighters, divider tabs, combination lock and pencil sharpener. To make it worse, every class had to have a separate color which made the cost rise even higher. The teachers are out of control. We should rein them in. There is no reason to make parents and students jump through hoops and waste their time and money!