10 tips to make date night hotter!
A few weeks ago we were talking about divorced couples dating, and we had multiple requests for ways to rev up date nights for married couples. We can talk about fun places to go on date nights, but I thought you would be more interested in this fantastic article I found in “Women’s Health” magazine:
“Little Moves, Big Pleasures: These 101 sex boosters will keep you busy (and satisfied) all summer long.”
The story by Colleen Oakley is in its June edition, but it is not online so I can’t link to it in its entirety. However, I am pulling, will full credit to “Women’s Health” and Colleen Oakley, 10 of her cleanest tips. You will have to buy the magazine for the 91 others – many of them much more explicit than what I’m writing here!
(Be sure to check out the “Women’s Health” site for lots of interesting sex tips. They have a quiz about your partner’s equipment, which I scored very poorly on! Need to study up. As well as some diagrams you’ll want to see – enough said!)
Without further ado, here are 10 tips to make date night hotter from Colleen Oakley of “Women’s Health” magazine.
10. Get at least eight hours of sleep! Oakley reports a recent study links poor sleep habits with a bad sex life.
9. “Break out the wine.” Researchers in Italy found that women who drank two glasses of red wine a day had more sexual desire than those who didn’t.
8. “Don’t skip the gym.” Oakley says that women who get just 20 minutes of exercise a day reported having better sex than women who didn’t exercise at all.
7. “Pop in earplugs.” The author says this will enhance the sound of your breathing and block out the rest of the world so you can focus on your other four senses. (So we won’t hear the kids knocking on the bedroom door?)
6. “Wear stilettos.” I love this one ladies. Apparently, “heels directly work the muscles linked to orgasm.” No more Kegels! Just wear heels. Can this be true?
5. “Use two forms of birth control.” This one makes sense. If you’re not worried about getting pregnant, you’ll enjoy yourself more.
4. “Send him a hoochymail.” The author reports that while e-mail and texting are great ways to seduce your hubby, they can also be accidentally seen by others – ie his boss! “For safe and secure texting, go to hoochymail.com to share your fantasy with your significant other.” It’s free.
3. “Make a naughty suggestion box.” Write down your fantasies and pull them out of the box when you need some zing.
2. “Ask him to wear the cologne he wore on your first date.” I really like this one. The author reports smell evokes such strong memories it can transport you back to the beginning of your relationship! (When you actually liked each other – I’m just kidding!!)
1. “Don’t wait until you’re in the mood!” I love this one because I think ladies are waiting for the perfect time and it just isn’t going to happen. You’ve got kids running around, you’re tired, the house is a mess, there’s never going to be the perfect time.
Oakley reports: “Recent research suggests that women’s arousal is more elicited than self-generated.” Meaning, even if you don’t feel like having sex right then, if you start fooling around, you’ll get into the mood! Good to know!
So what do you think of Oakley’s cleanest tips? What are your best tips that won’t get me fired – please use euphemisms where appropriate. Also, without getting too graphic let me know what you think of the other articles on their Web site. Again please keep it as clean as possible and don’t get me fired!
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42 comments Add your comment
nurse&mother
June 12th, 2009
12:40 am
Interestingly, we already do about half of these. Already discovered the cologne tip. I’ll have to try the ear plugs. I wonder if a wine cooler counts?
Jeff
June 12th, 2009
7:03 am
y’all have a lot more of these up there than we have access to down here, but there are certain stores that have a WIDE range of interesting ideas. Always a great source of ideas, even if you don’t buy any of the wilder stuff.
Jeff
June 12th, 2009
7:06 am
of the ideas here, 1, 9, and 10 are my favs. I never mind T having a girls’ night out – because I know I’ll have a nice night in when she gets home! :D
Andrea
June 12th, 2009
7:43 am
The tips are good. I am a firm believer in experiencing new things with your significant other. Here’s one that worked for me: We go to a place we haven’t been before that is based on an interest or desire of the other. For example, my ex was interested in photography. He wasn’t an expert on the new digital camera equipment. (Note: The camera shop was a locally owned one, not a chain. We had been loyal to them for so many years and that is why they let us borrow the camera) So, we borrowed a camera from the local camera shop and drove to Helen, GA for the day. It was a great date. We left early and we hiked at Amicaola (sp?) Falls and took some really great photos. So, next time, we would go somewhere based on an interest of mine.
JJ
June 12th, 2009
7:49 am
Buy a dirty magazine and read the fantasy letters out loud to each other.
Pack a picnic lunch and surprise him at work. Steal him away for a romantic lunch in the park.
Make a hotel reservation and don’t let him know. Before check in, if you can, run down there, and set up a picnic on the bed with cheese, crackers, wine, etc. Write on the mirror in the bathroom “Meet me here in 20 minutes, you bring the wine, I’ll bring the bubbles”…..
Send the kids to day care, or a baby sitter, both of you play hookey from work, and stay nekkid at home all day.
lakerat
June 12th, 2009
7:54 am
JJ’s suggestion adds reality to the old saying “he can eat crackers in may bed anytime”!
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
June 12th, 2009
7:55 am
JJ — loving those!!
Photius
June 12th, 2009
8:19 am
Men don’t want romance… We want our wives as nasty as possible. Men will do all the other stuff, but we want you to become as nasty as possible. If you ladies do that, we’ll even cuddle afterwords! Cheers~
Patience
June 12th, 2009
8:21 am
Two words: Open relationship.
motherjanegoose
June 12th, 2009
8:23 am
Curious about number 9 because I have also read this…does anyone know….nurse&mother?
I copied this from a web page:
Drinking just one large glass of wine a day increases the chances of developing breast cancer by a fifth, say experts.
The amount of alcohol in measures regularly served in wine bars and pubs pushes up the risk of cancer by far more than most women realise, it is claimed.
A large glass of wine is the equivalent of three units of alcohol at 12 per cent strength.
Drinking two glasses raises the risk by more than a third and it doubles for women who consume nine units or three glasses a day compared with those who do not drink.
However, Government research reveals that four out of five women are ignorant of the breast cancer risk.
JJ
June 12th, 2009
8:28 am
Thanks for putting a damper on our Friday topic Mother Jane……
J$
June 12th, 2009
8:30 am
Photius you are right on. Romance is for the women only, men get no “excitement” from that at all, they only go along with it because they know it will payoff in the end. Women, men want you to be perfectly honest, slutty as possible behind closed doors.
motherjanegoose
June 12th, 2009
8:44 am
o.k. I will leave y’all alone …for some the last part may not matter and ( as they say) ignorance is bliss…I am just wondering if anyone knows if this is true…have a good day.
Stan
June 12th, 2009
9:01 am
MJG,
I stopped paying too much attention to “studies” because I found that so many of them contridict others and they are generally skewed by who is paying for them. Like did you know that according to the MI Cherry group that tart cherries are great for increased blood flow, reducing symptoms of gout, even tire wear, reduced chance of cancer in teenage boys, long happy love life, and fewer computer viruses.
I mean it is just that silly with most of them and I can’t trust any of them.
Also, True…men really don’t care much about romance…just what it leads to.
Becky
June 12th, 2009
9:11 am
We’re all going to die anyway, so why not enjoy life while we can..You can find a “study” on just about anything that we eat or drink that is bad for us, so what do we do, stop drinking and eating? I don’t consider myself ignorant, it’s just that as with kids, you pick your battles..
We have tried all of these except 7 & 8.. We have no children, so 7 isn’t something that we need..8, because until just the last year, I wasn’t in need of a gym..That has all changed now..After 15 years, we still have a very good relationship…
Turd Ferguson
June 12th, 2009
9:17 am
These studies are a waste of time. Here is the deal…
A maid in the living room.
A cook in the kitchen.
A slut in the bedroom.
If ya cant do that ladies then thats fine…we will simply find it elsewhere. Pretty simple eh!!
HB
June 12th, 2009
9:29 am
Re: wine. MJG, you are correct about too much wine upping one’s cancer risk. That’s been shown in multiple studies, including one that came out a couple of months ago, conducted by a cancer prevention research center and funded by NIH (neutral sources, not like J&J-Tylenol funding a study that shows negative aspects of aspirin), that said 2 glasses of wine per day increases the risk by 24%. Even before these studies hit the news in recent years, the recommended limit on alcohol for women for general good health was 1 drink per day (2 for men). More may be ok every now and then ;), but not 2 glasses every day. And be sure you know what a “glass” is — it’s not the monster-sized goblet you get at some restaurants.
Photius
June 12th, 2009
9:39 am
My wife is a freak – we’re 40 – but when she speaks with her friends about how to spice things up by “getting nasty” for him, the vast majority of her friends shut down and say “I would never do that” or “I don’t care if he would love to do that, I AM NOT DOING THAT, EVER”. Closed minds at age 40, especially once the children are born. Most are reduced to 20 minute fun sessions of dull repetitive non-imaginative love making. The one comment her friends say frequently is “Well, I don’t get anything out of doing that so why should I?”.
Just my observation: men will and should give you all the romance you desire. In return, I see a lot of mom’s who have shut down their exploration and experimentation of getting nasty for their man. I look at most of my wife’s friends and conclude that just about all of them are dull and non-imaginative and will never go outside their own confort zone. Just a suggestion to the mom’s.
JJ
June 12th, 2009
9:54 am
I agree with the studies comments. If we paid attention to every single study, we would all starve to death, not go outside, never have any kind of fun, etc.
I’m with Becky……lets live life while we are here. Dance like no one’s watching……(which I have been doing lately with my new iPod….caught myself dancing in the driveway while doing yardwork last weekend)…
Stan
June 12th, 2009
11:34 am
Dang…this topic got totally de-railed…I was looking forward to it too..
Becky
June 12th, 2009
11:43 am
Stan, have you made up your mind about going to cooking school?
Stan
June 12th, 2009
11:47 am
I know that I want to…but was recently told that my job will be going away sometime between now and this time next year, I’m thinking later this year at best, so I may try to get a entry level job cooking somewhere if I can afford the pay cut. If not then I’ll get to it when I can. But yes I do want to go and probably will within the next couple of years.
Thanks for asking
Becky
June 12th, 2009
12:27 pm
Sorry to hear about your job..I’ll keep you in my thoughts and prayers..
sd
June 12th, 2009
12:38 pm
If you really want it to be hot, then talk during sex. Thats the key. Tell your husband in the dirtiest way you can just how much you are enjoying it. Compliment him and say things that he would never imagine you saying.
Becky
June 12th, 2009
1:03 pm
Strawberries and whipcream never hurt either…
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
June 12th, 2009
1:21 pm
Really derailed people — focus on the topic!! what are nice ways to spice up date night — also did you look at the quiz or charts from the link?/ how did you do???
Stan
June 12th, 2009
1:47 pm
Thanks Becky…
Ok back to topic at hand.
1. “Don’t wait until you’re in the mood!” – Probably the MOST important one here. From my point of view, except in rare circumstances I’m always ready for things to heat up however I get tired of getting shot down or getting a total lack of response to my “suggestion”…I wish my wife would be better at giving a positive response or if she knows that she just doesn’t want to for any reason tell me…
Keep things light hearted and playful, things can progress from there easily.
If it is date night and you go out for dinner, don’t eat a big heavy meal. take the time to “play” a little at dinner. Discreetly flash a little skin, play footsie etc.
jess
June 12th, 2009
2:04 pm
we all want it to end really hot and steamy–whether you admit it or not..what I used to do was always use “toys” on myself before the date…but not to the point of climax…I wanted to get in the mood as most as I could–so I could be thinking what he was thinking about when we’re out that night…and that keeps you in the mood all night..and it takes the smallest thing to get you totally back on again… using that toy again on yourself at night..will have him bounce of the walls with you!
Becky
June 12th, 2009
2:30 pm
Thersa, I failed the quiz..I ony got three right..Of course, I’m 47 and have only been in 3 real relationships my whole life..Dated one guy all thru high school, was with my ex for 10 years and have been with my now husband for 15 years..
Theresa Walsh Giarrusso
June 12th, 2009
3:32 pm
Becky — I only got three right too!! I’ve been married for 15 years and it said I wasn’t qualified to use the machinery. — that’s not good!!
Ross
June 12th, 2009
4:06 pm
Wow, the AJC pays someone to write this crap? I thought this was a column about a Spike Lee sponsored jazz fest. Instead it’s a column and how to turn a grizzly into a cougar.
-drl
BC
June 12th, 2009
4:20 pm
Duh! If you drink 2 glasses of red wine chances are you will be a little tipsy and ready to get some!!!!
Becky
June 12th, 2009
4:28 pm
Enter your comments here
Becky
June 12th, 2009
4:31 pm
How about skipping work one day and having a date day? Go to the a movie or to a art gallery or just something silly??
jess
June 12th, 2009
5:12 pm
thats fine…why go out?..just stay at home and have crazy sex everywhere in the house..and in the backyard..to a point where I cant walk the next day!!….. its out there I know..but what better way to “spice” up your relationship..get that body and mouth a good workout!!!
jodee
June 12th, 2009
5:41 pm
We went out for dinner at a nice restaurant recently… the kind where you savor several courses slowly and linger over the meal. Just after we ordered cocktails, I causally mentioned that I wasn’t wearing any panties, and I made some allusions throughout the evening about creative bush trimming. He couldn’t wait to get me home.
Morgan
June 12th, 2009
6:07 pm
Admittedly, I’m neither married nor a mom. But these are some pretty great ideas. Although I’m not sure about the earplugs … I think you’d want to encourage “pillow talk” ; )
FCM
June 12th, 2009
8:55 pm
I am pretty sure I need the date before I can spice it up…..My ‘rabbit’ didn’t seem to complain about anything in the bedroom. Then again it was only recently that I got accused of being a ‘cougar’……ah well, as they say all good things must come to an end and that did. Not looking for a ‘rabbit’ (then again I wasn’t looking the last time either). Photias seems to be on target with the few men I have been intimate with in my lifetime.
Here is to hoping to have a steady (committed – cohabbing- name sharing) hunny to annoy the neighbors with soon!
FCM
June 12th, 2009
8:56 pm
oh and….
Photias you forgot she should be a LADY in public.
FCM
June 12th, 2009
9:10 pm
Teresa I am saddened to say that I scored 7 out of 9……Now how I can be the one without a man and yet be classified as “A real man handler?” Life is just so unfair I could write a book! LOL Actually, I just have listened well when others talk. People love to talk about sex….good, bad or mediocre sex they talk about it.
Stan
June 13th, 2009
7:10 am
LOL…I got 5/9
nurse&mother
June 14th, 2009
8:33 pm
OK, I took the quiz and got 6 out of 9. I would have gotten 7 right, but I changed my mind at the last minute. It’s true what they say about sticking with your first answer.