Editor’s Note: You guys voted on our new topic yesterday and sex and the divorcee won. Disney tips and quiz will be later this week!
With 40 to 50 percent of couples divorcing in the U.S. (depending on which stat you believe), you’re bound to know friends or acquaintances who have ended up splitting. And every time I hear about another divorce, I start to think about that couple dating – and eventually sleeping with — other people.
Based on what I have observed and how I think I would react if I got divorced, I’m going to theorize that it’s easier for men to get dates and have sex after getting divorced.
Here’s my reasoning:
A. I think in most cases (and I don’t have an official stat on this) women end up being the custodial parent — meaning they have the children more nights a week than their husbands. Just like it’s hard to go on a date when you’re married, it’s hard to date if you have the kids and are divorced. I think men would have more opportunity to go out on dates because they don’t have the kids every night.
B. I think men’s bodies change less during marriage so they are more confident about starting over – finding a date and the possibility of sex. I have to say that if I ever got divorced I would feel the need to distribute “before photos” before removing any clothing at all! It’s not fair that they think this is what your body looks like – this is what giving birth and nursing children does to your body! Michael could hit the dating scene essentially looking the same as he did when we met in college. No amount of gym time will completely correct what my babies have done to my body. (And that’s fine, as long as I don’t get divorced!)
C. I don’t think men take sex as seriously and reverently as women do. I think men fall into bed fairly easily. I could be wrong (and I’m sure you’ll tell me if I am) but I think it would take a long time for a woman, especially one who was married for years, to sleep with a new man.
D. Also I think it would be harder for a woman to find a place to have sex. I have one divorced mom friend with four kids – where is she going to do it? You don’t want to take a man back to your house because your kids are there. You don’t want to spend the night away because then the kids and the babysitter will want to know where you’ve been. I think once the Dad is divorced, if he’s not the custodial parent, it’s just like before he was married.
What do you think: Who has an easier time finding dates and sex after divorce – the mom or the dad?
If you are a divorced woman, how long before you starting dating again? How long did it take for you to have sex? Do you know how long it took for your ex-husband to date and have sex?
If you are the divorced Dad, do you think my assumptions are valid? Do you think it’s physically and mentally easier for men to start over with new women? How long did it take you to start dating? How long did it take you to have sex?