Do you kiss your spouse goodbye every morning?

I was talking to a friend one morning on the phone when my husband left for work. She was aghast that I didn’t kiss him goodbye. I did stop talking to her to say to him “I love you. Have a great day.”

I realized that I rarely kiss him goodbye in the morning, but I do always say “I love you and have a great day.”  I think when I worked downtown with him and we drove in together, we kissed goodbye on the street. I am wondering if I don’t kiss him goodbye in the morning because I am rarely out of my pj’s when he leaves and haven’t brushed my teeth yet. (That’s the reason I’m going with!)

What about you? Do you make a point to kiss your spouse goodbye every morning? Why do you make it a point? What do you think it signifies if you do or if you don’t?

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91 comments Add your comment

motherjanegoose

April 23rd, 2009
8:05 am

My husband gets up at 4:00 a.m. and leaves when he is ready… I AM NOT UP AT THIS HOUR!
( my shortest comment to date and we will see if it makes it to the blog as some of mine are not….LOL)

MomsRule

April 24th, 2009
7:34 am

Yes, every morning. Actually we kiss good bye every time one of us is leaving for anything. One reason is because we love each other and the other reason is that I never want the guilt and regret of not kissing him good bye if, heaven forbid, he should not return home.

I don’t think it signifies anything. Couples relate differently. Something that works for one couple may not work for another.

JJ

April 24th, 2009
8:06 am

No spouse here, but I do kiss my daughter every morning when I drop her off at school. It embarrasses the heck out of her!! Sometimes I even roll the window down and shout “MOMMIE LOVES YOU”……

Photius

April 24th, 2009
8:08 am

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ……. Lame topic

Kathy

April 24th, 2009
8:15 am

Yes! We kiss everytime one of us leaves the house. We say I Love You everytime one of us leaves or hangs up the phone after a conversation. I agree with MomsRule…..what if it is the last time you get to kiss/hug/say I love you? We also do that with Little E….kiss/hug/I love you whenever either one of us leaves her.

JJ…..the visual of you yelling Mommy Loves You made me giggle! Based on all of your posts, you seem like a cool mom raising a great daughter. I hope that Little E and I have the same great relationship that it sounds like you have with your daughter! : )

motherjanegoose

April 24th, 2009
8:21 am

Photius….you and jb ( from yesterday afternoon) should get together…you are both so insightful.

Guess what…if either of you has something clever to say you can ( what we call it) hijack the blog with an interesting topic or question that you want to contribute….let’s see watcha got!
It IS Friday and we are looking for something FUN….that is a hint.

I saw this on a billboard last week and wanted to pass it along;

SOME PEOPLE PURSUE HAPPINESS WHILE OTHERS CREATE IT

When bloggers share something that makes any of us laugh…that would be creating happiness.
I have enjoyed several posts and hope that maybe a few of you have enjoyed mine.

Those that simply read to see what is out there could now step up to the plate and actually do something instead of just whining.

CJ

April 24th, 2009
8:26 am

Most mornings I do. I agree with momsrule..I would feel so guilty if I didn’t kiss him or at least say I love you and then something awful happen. Have a Happy Friday everyone!!!

Michelle

April 24th, 2009
8:26 am

I am like some of the others, we kiss each time before leaving to go anywhere. That’s usually followed by, “be careful and have a good day.” I don’t kiss the step kids (they would likely stroke out), but I do give them a hug! I think it’s nice to show the emotion and it teaches the little ones that it IS ok to show affection to those you love!

Stan

April 24th, 2009
8:37 am

Yup, everytime one of us is leaving we kiss goodbye. Also we say “I love you” a lot throughout the time in person and always on the phone. Like the others said, what if it was the last time we saw each other?

I saw a funny most of you will probably like the other day, if I can remember it

A woman takes what you give her and makes it bigger and better: You give her sex, she makes a baby. Give her a house, she makes a home. Give her groceries, she makes a meal. So if you give her any crap expect to get a load of POO in exchange

I cleaned that up a little but you get the idea :)

motherjanegoose

April 24th, 2009
8:40 am

GO STAN…now that is what I am talking about….LOL

JJ

April 24th, 2009
8:40 am

Stan, love it!!!!

What do you get when you cross PMS with GPS? A beyotch that can find you ANY WHERE, ANY TIME, ANY PLACE!!!!!

JJ

April 24th, 2009
8:43 am

Kathy, it’s all about attitude, but thank you for that nice comment. I made a promise to myself this year, “no stress, no drama”. So far so good. I love to laugh A LOT……I’ll be turning 50 this year, and I try to have a positive outlook on life. I am amazed by the amount drama people seem to create for themselves. Some seek it out. I have surrounded myself with some very wonderful happy people….

D

April 24th, 2009
8:59 am

If I’m up when he goes to work, he usually leaves between 5:30-5:45 am I’ll kiss him goodbye. I also kiss the kids and hubby before going out and the kids get kisses before they get out of the car for preschool.
I’m also like MomsRule, I don’t want to regret not kissing them goodbye or saying I love you, God forbid something happens to one of us.

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
9:06 am

Its the little things can keep a marriage not just together…but fabulous! Our marriage isn’t a blast everyday…some are just ok. But with the exception of when Jesse is traveling…we kiss every single dern morning!!! I think its very important. I’m not saying there aren’t some nights that we don’t go to bed planning eachother’s demise…in great detail:) But all is forgotten and forgiven in the am and its good! I hope I never get to the point that I let him get away without a lip-lock!! And as disgusting as this sounds….when he travels, we text x’s and o’s!!! I’m sure some of you just threw up in your mouths a little:)

Brush your toothies and plant one on him one morning….he might just come home for lunch:)

DB

April 24th, 2009
9:21 am

Well, he works at home, so it’s a short commute to his office! Suffice to say, we get lots of kisses throughout the day. We kiss for making breakfast, for lunch, to thank the other for fixing a Diet Coke or ice tea, or when one or the other brings in the mail, or just when we walk by each other in the kitchen. And, of course, there’s lots of kissing during those ubiquitous “staff meetings”! ;-)

muffinpaws

April 24th, 2009
9:23 am

My husband gets up at 5:30 to go to work. While he is getting ready I go to the kitchen and pack his lunch and make his breakfast. We chat while he eats. We kiss goodbye every morning. After he goes to work, I go back to bed for a bit. I have been doing this for almost 14 years. I think with a bit of extra work marriage can be great. I am always disgusted when my girlfriends don’t even wake up to tell their husbands goodbye.

deidre_NC

April 24th, 2009
9:25 am

im not sure if its a southern thing–but i was taught as young as i can remember to ALWAYS say i love you and kiss and hug goodbye before leaving or whatever…for reasons already posted. my kids do it…most of my friends do it. my kids have even called me from school to apologize and say i love you if they left for school mad..and i have called and had the secretary tell them i love them if i did it lol…i live in a place where we can actually do that–call the school and say..hey ____ please tell ___ i love her/him and im sorry i was mad when they left… and they will do it. lol gotta love here!!

deidre_NC

April 24th, 2009
9:36 am

ps i love the jokes–thanks jj and stan!!! im with you jj–i have made a conscience efort to try and rid my life of drama—i get enough at work where i cant control it…and even there i just try my best to stay out of it all…but at home..no way—i refuse to fight–to argue–i am 56 and have almost finished raising my kids (as finished as you can really ever be lol) and i am doing what I need now…having PEACE as often as i can lol

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
9:37 am

Awesome Deidre!!!!

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
9:38 am

I think I will try calling the school in a bit and have them tell E that she needs to clean the bathroom when she gets home….think they’ll go for it:)

motherjanegoose

April 24th, 2009
9:48 am

muffinpaws….you get the wife award!!! Could you come over here LOL? I cannot go back to sleep after I get up and 4:00 a.m. is way too early for me!

When we were first married, I layed out my husband’s clothes the night before ( even underwear and sox). When I turned 40 and started traveling I decided he needed to do this himself, as I could not handle packing my own suitcase and lay out 3-4 days of clothes for him too . I used to pack his suitcase for our vacations too. He manages just fine now that he is used to doing it himself.

Do many women who work outside of the home every day still get up and make their husband’s breakfast and pack his lunch? Theresa…do you do this for Michael? Just wondering…maybe I am the only one who does not do this. I used to put the leftovers, from dinner, in a nice container for him to take to work but after many days of seeing it left in the fridge….I stopped.

I do kiss my kids goodbye, as I am usually up when they leave at 6;30. I call my grown son once a week or so to tell him I love him and even at 21, he tells me back on the phone…while in the Pharmacy!

Note to parents of college bound….please get your child an alarm clock NOW and let them get themselves up for school. Mommy will soon not be available to poke and prod them out from under the covers…although I have read about parents who call their college students every day to make sure they are getting up for class….WHAT?

deidre_NC

April 24th, 2009
9:49 am

lmao–let me know if it works!!

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
9:56 am

I make all of Jesse’s meals if I am home. He makes the bulk of our money and does all the honey-do’s. Its the least I can do. But I have NEVER layed out his clothes…I ain’t his momma!

JJ

April 24th, 2009
10:05 am

Momma Jane – I introduced an alarm clock to my daughter about 4 years ago, when she started high school, and had to get up at “The crack of dawn thirty”. But I usually go into her room, give her a big o’kiss and yank the covers off!!! That gets her up on cold days!!! If that doesn’t work, I sic the dogs on her…..

Michelle

April 24th, 2009
10:06 am

LOL…this is really bad, but many times my husband will get my clothes out! He shops for me and everything! He knows my sizes and tastes (and he is very fashionable on his own!) In answer to MJG, no, I do not make breakfast for my hubby (or the kids for that matter). I am usually the first one out of the house! I will cook on the weekends sometimes. Our hours are kind of crazy! In the evenings it’s usually just the little guy and myself so cooking a big meal is typically out of the question! If the step kids are visiting, I’m more liable to cook a big meal! If I were at home more often, I think I probably would!

motherjanegoose

April 24th, 2009
10:30 am

Beginning to feel a little better…
I cook a nice meal each night for dinner….we sit down ( as a family) whenever I am home…now for the next 5 weeks….yippee! Since we are both working and split the bills, I do not feel I need to make all the meals for everyone. My daughter is an excellent cook. She loves the Food Network and prepared everything for Thanksgiving except the turkey. She is very independent and self sufficient for being 16, and knows how to handle things around here when it is just her and he Dad.

Michelle, you have a keeper!

JJ…you are on the right track. My daughter’s friend ( who went with us to NYC) has a mother who gets her up. Her mother told me that they drive her to school every day, as she cannot get up in time to make the bus. I gently hinted about how she may want to get started on getting an alarm clock now but I do not think she really understands why.

Becky

April 24th, 2009
10:39 am

Yes, we usually do kiss good morning if he’s at home..He travels a lot & when he’s home a lot of times he’s gone when I get up..

I do make it a point to have dinner ready for him when he comes back fron a trip..I ususally iron his clothes..As Jesses Girl said, he takes care of all of the maintaince on the house, so these offset each other…

Michelle, that’s awesome about your husband..No way would I trust mine to pick out for me..I love bright colors & he doesn’t, so he would have me in drab solid colors all the time..

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
10:54 am

Jesse has offered to buy some clothing items for me….he said that if I buy another black shirt he is staging an intervention!!!

Teacher, Too

April 24th, 2009
10:56 am

I kiss my significant other (more than a boyfriend but not yet a fiance) goodbye every morning. We also do the “love you” on the phone, e-mail, and when we leave to go to work. I do the same with my parents when I speak to them on the phone, and when I leave to come home from a visit.

Now, this is off-topic, and not a fun-Friday topic, either. What is a teacher supposed to do when several of her middle school students don’t fit in a desk? (I blogged about this yesterday on Get Schooled– I was so frustrated!). We are in the middle of testing, and I have a couple of 6th grade students who barely fit in a generous-sized desk. (I’m not talking about the little wooden desks from twenty-plus years ago.)

They have a difficult time sitting still becuase they don’t fit! Are schools supposed to super-sized desks now because we have many students who cannot fit into them?

I don’t remember in all my years of teaching of seeing so many obese kids. I’m not talking about overweight– I mean students in middle school who are twenty-five, fifty, seventy pounds overweight for their height. I have several 6th graders who outweigh this forty-plus year old by fifty pounds or more!

As parents, what do you do to encourage your children to maintain a healthy weight?

Mr.

April 24th, 2009
10:58 am

Both my wife and I have been gainefully employeed outside the home while raising our kids – she had to be at work by 7am so she always left before 6am. For 16 years I got the kids up and dropped them off at daycare or school, until the oldest son could drive and then they were on their own to get up, and get to school (I would leave breakfast already prepared for them) – never once did we hear that they were late for school or did not go. Unfortunately, my commitment as a father made me late for work sometimes, and after 14 years my employer had had enough of my “lateness” and fired me. Ironically, that was 11 months AFTER my son began driving, and during which time I, too, had begun arriving at work around 7am for those last 11 months. But all worked out well – I found another job quickly that paid more, and the first company continued to pay me for 2 years after they fired me “without cause”…..

Anyway, my wife is now retired; one kid is out of college, and the second will be out of college next year. Just last week I sent the youngest son an email from my office at 6:25am – he wrote back at 7am and said “what are you doing at work at 6:25am – you are the boss and should sleep in!” I replied, “that is why I am the boss and why I want to stay that way, but the bigger question is, why are YOU up at 7 am, when you do not have a class until 10am”? – (he was studying some “more” for a test at 10am). I guess they learned that they do need to get up on their own!

Regarding dressing myself – if my wife ever laid out clothes for me it would be a disaster – she has no taste – look at who she married! Plus, all my suits are black or blue, so it really is a no-brainer for me, just match up a tie with a white shirt and I am good to go! Sometimes I do have on one black sock and one blue sock, but at 0 dark thirty, who can tell? And yes, I try to kiss her goodbye every morning – but since she is usually asleep at 5:30am (she says that is when she sleeps best!) I really try not to bother her, lest I wake up the dogs – and then she is in real trouble, and so am I when I get home!

JJ

April 24th, 2009
11:05 am

We don’t do breakfast in my house, except on the weekends. I have never been big on breakfast, and don’t make the time in the mornings. I do, however, stop and get a sausage/cheese bagel every friday morning. I always pick up a dozen donuts for the office, but I don’t eat them….we refer to donuts as “fat pills”……

Every other weekend we go out for breakfast. I usually cook on Sunday a.ms….I have gone as far as to make extra pancakes and freeze them. Then we can pull them out of the freezer and pop them into the microwave, and go…….my daughter usually grabs a granola bar for the car ride to school.

Yes I drive my senior to school. It gives us a few extra minutes in the mornings, and I like having her in the car. It’s going to be weird next fall when she’s off at college, and I am alone in the car in the mornings.

Stan

April 24th, 2009
11:06 am

My wife does technically make my breakfast and lunch. Though breakfast is cereal and she pours me a container of milk, and lunch is whatever leftovers from the food I cooked on the weekend or night before.

Teacher, Too
I was a fat kid and I loved the seperate desk and chair. The one piece units were tough to work. I barely fit into them.

Stan

April 24th, 2009
11:10 am

Oh yes and I usually pick out my wifes clothes but only if she is there to try them on. She has lost a good bit of weight lately and is going with more color without me anyway so she has gotten better at it.

Jesse's Girl

April 24th, 2009
11:30 am

I agree..obesity with our kids has hit an all time high. Its disgusting really. I blame too much technology in the home, eating things that come in boxes and parents who are not involved enough in their child’s day-to-day choices. It cannot be that every fat adult or child has some kind of hormonal imbalance!!! Its just not possible! Move their butts some….it breaks my heart to see an obese child.

motherjanegoose

April 24th, 2009
11:33 am

The main reason I put my husband’s clothes together as he did NOT know how to match anything.
He still sometimes looks bad but has gotten much better at what actually goes together.

MR….thanks for joining us….good comments! Some folks think that when you are the boss you do not have to do anything ( you do not want to do)….in reality, you do everything…..LOL!

Active Duty Mom

April 24th, 2009
11:58 am

You bet my husband and I kiss each other good-bye and give each other a big hug before heading off to work and when we come home in the evening! This became all the more important when we found out two weeks ago that one of my former shipmates was killed in Afghanistan and left behind a very loving husband and 3-year old daughter. Folks, tomorrow is not guaranteed! Your spouse may not be deployed half-way across the world, but you don’t know if that 18-wheeler has your husband’s or wife’s name on it today. By the way, I do work outside the home and fix portable breakfasts and lunches for myself, my husband and my two kids. It only takes a few minutes and not only are we eating healthier but it costs so much less! Some of the lunch places in downtown DC charge $9 for a lousy sandwich, chips, and soda. Unbelievable! Conversely, my husband will iron my uniforms (with military creases no less!). We’ve always worked together as a team and it has served us well. What we found that works is to get into a routine schedule and stick with it.

new mom

April 24th, 2009
1:45 pm

My husband and I don’t kiss before he leaves, but that’s because usually I’m still asleep. And thankfully he isn’t hurt that I don’t get up with him, he knows I need all the sleep I can get–cause when little one wakes, it’s all craziness, all the time! I do try to fix his lunch at night, usually while I’m cleaning the kitchen from dinner. And while I don’t get up to make his breakfast, I make sure we have his favorite (oatmeal to go bars and vanilla yogurt) on hand for him to take.

One thing I’ve found is how much our sweet girl (19 mths) loves to see mommy and daddy kiss each other. We always do that when one of us leaves, but even just around the house–she loves to see it. She’ll smile and run in for kisses too! It’s a good reminder of how important it is to model that love for her, and remind her that we love each other too.

muffinpaws

April 24th, 2009
1:47 pm

I think that working together as a team is the way marriage is supposed to be Active Duty Mom. I just figure that since he works I need to support him the best way I can while I stay home. Making sure he eats healthy meals and knowing that I am always here is important. As for getting up to chat with him, I’ve seen too many lonely husbands. Sometimes they just want someone to listen to them, even if it is just talking about the book they are reading. I don’t ever want my husband to feel as if I am not there mentally for him.

Tiffany

April 24th, 2009
2:07 pm

I don’t do the kissing thing in the morning, but I do say have a great day, ect. I guess it’s too early…

Dave

April 24th, 2009
3:14 pm

Who loves you more? The wife who won’t get up to kiss you goodbye or for that matter even come downstairs to acknowledge your home…. or the dog? Try this lock your wife and your dog in the car trunk for a hour, when you open it you will see who truly loves you! :)

Dave

April 24th, 2009
3:14 pm

Who loves you more? The wife who won’t get up to kiss you goodbye or for that matter even come downstairs to acknowledge your home…. or the dog? Try this lock your wife and your dog in the car trunk for a hour, when you open it you will see who truly loves you! :) and be ready to outrun your wife!

Becky

April 24th, 2009
3:34 pm

Dave, trust me in that if my husband tried to lock me in the trunk, he would not have to worry about which one loved him more..

Michelle

April 24th, 2009
3:35 pm

OK Dave, I hate to say it…but that’s funny! However, your bed might be cold for a LONG time after that! The dog can only do so much for a man!

new mom

April 24th, 2009
3:40 pm

Who loves you more? The husband who lets his preganant wife sleep a few more minutes in the morning, or the husband who locks her in the trunk? hmmmm…tough one.

jess

April 24th, 2009
3:41 pm

sometimes..but usually we try to get a quickie in the morning…nothing better than taking advantage of that morning w**dy!!..that takes care of the kissing and everything else in between :)

Katherine

April 24th, 2009
3:47 pm

Teacher, Too – I like how you explained your significant other (”more than a boyfriend but not yet a fiance”) – that’s exactly how I would describe mine. :)

We always, always, always kiss each other goodbye in the morning. I leave about half an hour before he does, so I get up, shower, and pack my lunch and he usually sleeps a little later (although he sometimes gets up while I’m in the shower and makes me breakfast!). But he’s always up and out of bed to say goodbye to me.

While I was between jobs (last October through this past March), I woke up when he did and made him breakfast every day and then went back to bed for an hour or two. :)

Brown-Eyed Girl!

April 24th, 2009
3:51 pm

We do everytime one of us leaves the other. Our kids too! If one of us is asleep when the other leaves, we kiss each other on the check or forehead. I wasn’t this affectionate before I met my husband, but he managed to bring that out in me!

Stacey

April 24th, 2009
3:51 pm

We give each other a quick peck, say “I love you, have a nice day,” etc before we leave in the morning for work but not when leave during the day (like to go to the grocery store). I actually had never thought about it until I read the topic. My husband sleeps through all methods of alarms so I wake him in the morning. Twice a week he goes in at 10:00 so when I get to work I call back to wake him up. We (my son & I) wake him before we leave on his late days but he’s probably sleep again before I pull out of the driveway.

MJG…I fix breakfast for my husband & son in the morning (I rarely eat breakfast), I lay his clothes out and 90% of the time I fix his plate at dinner. We all eat together on the nights that my husband works a “normal” schedule so as soon as I’m finished cooking, I fix all three plates and take them to the table. Some nights he gets off at 10:00 and I may or may not be awake when he gets home. If I’m awake, I heat up his food for him. If not, I leave his plate on the stove and he will heat it himself. I’m a light sleeper so I usually wake up when he unlocks the door and he’ll stick his head in the bedroom door and chat a second but I don’t get up. If I don’t wake up on my own he doesn’t wake me.

GRS

April 24th, 2009
3:53 pm

Way to go Stan. My husband and I kiss and say I love you every morning. It’s a great way to start the day.

Mike

April 24th, 2009
3:54 pm

I don’t think my wife has kissed me, period, in 10 years. I’ve kissed her, but she hasn’t kissed me back.

Oh well, still waiting…