I got a couple of text messages from my friend Felicia the other day. She was kind of freaking out because her new boyfriend did not “defend” her when they were out on a date recently. They were sitting in a movie theater when some jerk said something rude and a little threatening. Not only did her guy not say anything, he implied that she should watch herself with strangers.
Felicia is very traditional and she believes the man should take a leadership role as protector and provider. Needless to say, she is considering breaking up with this guy because she believes his character is lacking to let something like this happen.
I wonder if women today still think men are our protectors? Should a guy defend his woman’s honor in our so called modern society?
Ladies, is it important that you feel safe around the man you are dating? If he shows any kind of weakness, does it mean he is not a suitable mate?
Guys, do you hesitate to play the role of protector with women you date?
Considering the amount of time many of us spend at work, it is not a surprise when romance enters the picture. I believe dating your co-workers is probably one of the riskiest moves a person can make. There is potential for a lot of drama and if things don’t work out, you are left to carry the burden of your bad romance in the office.
I have heard of couples who say that dating someone at work was the only way they were ever going to find anyone. I have also witnessed a really bad break up among co-workers. Worst case scenario has to be the couple who literally got into a physical fight when one dumped the other.
Do you think that dating a co-worker is appropriate? What if the person was your boss?
What are the pros and cons of dating at work? What are some tips would you give on office romance?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
A lot of single women worry about projecting a good girl image. This is especially true if you are a GRIT (girl raised in the south) – because being a lady is practically preached to us the minute we hit puberty. Sometimes, I wonder if women worry too much about image of purity, though.
I argued with my guy friend about this recently because he was complaining about how hard it was to find a “good” and positive woman to date. He said that many women project this image but after getting to know them, they don’t always share his values and morals.
How important is it for men to date women with “wholesome” with a good girl image? It seems that women with a little edge gets attention but how long does that kind of attention really last?
Guys, do you ever question the image of the women you date? Do you wonder if they are who they say they are? Do you think good girls are extinct?
Ladies, do you ever feel pressure to appear demure and innocent as to attract the “right” kind
I think one of the best parts of dating is when you get to meet someone new who can expose you to new experiences. Whether they hip you to a new language, different foods, or even music, our lives can actually become richer from some of our dating misadventures!
While having things in common can be good, dating someone from a totally different background, culture, or race can be enlightening! One of my friends is dating a guy from India. She is from Atlanta and has never been out of the country. Since she has dated him, she says that outlook on the world has really changed.
Of course, dating someone from a different culture can have its challenges. Sometimes customs, traditions, and values differ so much, it becomes hard to manage a relationship that has to merge all these things.
Have you ever dated someone who is from a different cultural background? Do you think it made things more interesting?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta
So I have heard about one night stands before, but apparently one month stands are all the rage now. Do you know what a one month stand is? Basically, it happens when one person wants to hook up but won’t come out and say that. Instead, they go through the motions of starting a new relationship and after about 30 days, they cut ties and move on.
One of my guy friends is guilty of this dating habit and I finally called him out on this pattern he has. He claims that he has good intentions but “these mini-relationships” fizzle out fast, not too long after the orgasm, I imagine. It makes me wonder if there is any real interest in starting something new or do we just convince ourselves that it is something real.
Have you ever been guilty of having one month stands? Have you had a period of time where you have started something up with someone but it keeps fading quickly and you are on to the next?
Why do you think we lose interest so fast? Is it because we prefer the
I was at a friend’s party recently and a bunch of couples were in attendance. Somehow the topic of marriage came up and one of the guys said that he and his wife contemplated having an open marriage. Of course, we all got nosy and asked loads of questions but they were pretty candid about what they wanted to try.
The husband basically said that he did not feel that monogamy was a realistic idea in terms of “forever faithful” so why not be practical about it? They agree to be honest when they meet someone they are attracted to. They also believe that they can date and pursue romantic interests as long as they inform the other.
I personally can’t imagine doing this type of open marriage, but I won’t knock it. I just think traditional marriage is not for everyone. If a couple can find a way to make this work for them, who am I to judge?
Would you ever consider having an open marriage? Do you think it is realistic?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating
Every now and again, I get an email from someone asking me for tips on how they can make their partner change. They get it in their heads that if they love someone enough, give them great sex, and sometimes financially support them, then eventually they will become the person they want them to be. This is when I know it’s basically a fairy tale that people are seeking, I call it Matrix Dating – not based in reality, but stuck in some kind of matrix that is half real, half fantasy.
Listen, there is no real way to make someone become marriage material. I do believe that people can change and grow, but I don’t think this growth can be coerced and manipulated. I have heard some men say that their woman forced them to grow up and become more mature, but I never heard anyone say it was because they demanded it.
Do you think that there is a way to inspire someone to grow and change? If someone has great potential, can a person mold them into becoming someone who is marriage
What do you do when you are attracted to someone, ask them out, then find there is zero chemistry? Do you think chemistry has to be instant or does it ever show up later?
After going on two dates, Benjamin said he is physically attracted to Sarah but they didn’t really have any chemistry. I wonder if we focus too much on the sparks and chemistry and not enough on compatibility. How important is chemistry to you?
If you met someone and didn’t immediately feel like you two had to that “chemical” connection, do you think it is a good idea to wait for it to happen?
Do you have to want to rip the clothes off someone to date them?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta
A reader wrote in asking for advice from everyone at Misadventures in Atlanta blog. “Holly” is 26 and has been dating Dylan for several months. She found some old pictures of Dylan’s last few girlfriends and she said they all looked like “Victoria Secret Angels”, which instantly made her feel insecure. She thinks she is “in his league” but admits that seeing his former girlfriends puts some kind of pressure on her all of a sudden.
Holly wants to know how do you handle dating someone who’s last girlfriend/boyfriend was wealthier, more beautiful, or simply more “awesome” compared to you? Dealing with insecurities in life is tough enough, what happens when it impacts your dating life too?
Have you ever dated someone who compares you to their ex? Do you think we consciously or subconsciously compare our current loves to our past loves? Is that normal?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta
I swore I was not going to watch any more reality tv shows set in Atlanta. I tried so hard to avoid The New Atlanta but my hair stylist forced me to watch! There I am sitting under the hair dryer rolling my eyes at what was about to happen next. Then the really gorgeous blonde dude Tribble, Trouble, or whatever his name is caught my attention.
Actually, it was his looks and what he said that made me perk up. He was trying to compose a text to a young lady he was interested in. Since she was black, he sort of second guessed himself on how to phrase his message. As if a black girl required special handling and lingo.
So I ask you dear readers, do you need a different approach for someone who is a different race? Don’t you run the risk as coming off as a jerk if you suddenly switched up the way you behaved or spoke?
Interestingly enough, white guys have told me that they are unsure of whether or not they should approach women of other races differently.
If you have dated