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Paying for dates

The costs of dating can get expensive so it’s understandable that people are selective about who they date. It makes sense not to sink a bunch of money into dating someone you aren’t truly interested in. One of my guy friends has some kind of system where he limits the amount of money he spends on first and second dates.

Do you think you should go Dutch and pay your own way on dates? Does it help to split the costs so that neither of you feel the pressure to always pay?

I try to at least reach for the check and I fully expect to pay. I think guys appreciate this and usually they insist on paying. I often offer to cover the tip in those cases.

How many dates should you pay for before sharing or splitting the check starts?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

269 comments Add your comment

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
6:10 am

How many dates should you pay for before splitting…?

Seems this is reversed..do u mean how many Dutch dates before u start paying for her…?

I think a dude must only date those chics he intends to pay for…Dutch is classless and cheap.
Now,if it is just your long known home girl and u two wanna go watch a game at the sports bar,yeah,u can do Dutch.

Don’t invite a new new gal for a date and then go Dutch….

Ummm,that is self elimination from the Coochie race! :lol:

And no hating fellas!

If u can’t spoil them,stay on the periphery.

Reminds me,back in the day before plastic money. When I took a gal out,my walllet would be thick. I always made sure,somehow,the chic sees the thick wallet. :lol:

When her mind is at ease because she knows the evening is covered,her coochie is less guarded! :lol:

Too funny! :lol:

Good morning MIA!

Cheap dudes don’t smash!

lee

January 22nd, 2014
6:54 am

Good morning, what happened to our 68 degree we had on Sunday?!, ugh

Dutch is for friends, i would not call that a date, i would believe he wasn’t interested and therefor he is in the friend zone. Now if we are in a relationship i will gladly take you out…until then unless it is your b-day that is not going to happen

Try to stay warm everyone

Button

January 22nd, 2014
8:14 am

I’ve never split a check or went dutch on a date. The guy pays for all the dates until we are exclusive then I’ll pay for some dates, no problem. I’ll offer to leave a tip.

Good morning!

Button

January 22nd, 2014
8:21 am

Some men are cheap cheap cheap! how can you invite a woman on a date and expect her to split the check or even go dutch? talk about a loser!
Also women stop reaching for the check, let the guy properly take you on a date. IMO two dates is too soon to start paying for his meal.
A man should show that woman that he is capable of taking care of his affairs and not needing her to pitch in and help esp to feed his gut.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
8:23 am

Hey everyone

Lee, it is WINTER time, it’s supposed to be cold. We just got you used to those abnormal winters! (global warming) LOL

As far as dates, he who asks, pays!!!

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
8:35 am

Good morning all,

Been on the sick and shut-in list for the last few days and I’m soooo over being sick. Missed ya’ll though!

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
8:42 am

Slim you poor baby, need me to come take care of you :-D

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
8:49 am

Single – Um….maybe. Me don’t fweel guuud :cry: I’m pretty sure folks at work thought I called off on purpose since Monday was the MLK holiday. lol

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
8:53 am

Slim what you need, some soup, some otc meds? I’ll even pay for it (LOL)

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
8:56 am

Single – Uh-oh, you paying for it?…um…usually there’s a catch at the end of that rope. I’ll need to really think about that. lol

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
8:58 am

Slim the catch is you must try and get well! Think you can handle it?

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
9:01 am

Slim…next october get a flu shot!

This is the second time u sick in 4 months.

And stop those noodle diets! :lol:
fruits and veggies,fruits and veggies,fruits and veggies…..say it!

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
9:22 am

Morning all!

I’ve always paid on dates and expected to pay. No problem. I’m interested in her, so, I pay. Simple. I never expected anything in return. Beyond her being herself and answering some questions (My attempt to get to know her better), I had no ulterior motives. Never set out to wine & dine for the sole purpose of pulling her dress up and getting a whiff at some point. Dutch? Gonna have to be fairly comfortable with her before I allow that. Even if she insists.

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
9:39 am

Ex – I won’t ever get a flu shot again…no sireee. And I couldn’t tell you the last time I had some noodles lol

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
9:39 am

Single – Um…I’m trying…I think I can, I think I can.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
9:42 am

Slim you had a bad experience with a flu shot, I’m with you never ever again, I’ll take my chances :-D so what you do you need me to bring you :-D

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
9:49 am

Single – Well, I’ve ran out of kleenex so you can start there…make sure it’s soft but not with that lotion in it. Aloe Vera will do ;-)

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
9:49 am

“Does it help to split the costs so that neither of you feel the pressure to always pay?” – Of course, if you’re in an exclusive relationship. While we’re getting to know each other and you ask me out, I certainly expect you to pay. I will leave the tip. If we’re going “dutch,” we’re just two people hanging out together. No law that the man has to pay for all the dates, unless you’re dating Daddy Warbucks.

Glad you’re feeling better, SlimNu.

Good Freaking Cold Hump Day Morning!

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
9:56 am

Thanks Leggs!

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
9:56 am

Where is everybody?

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
9:56 am

SlimNu ~ I’m with you, Kleenex with lotion in it is the PITS!

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
9:57 am

Slim just email me your order and address, and I’ll be on the way :-)

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
9:58 am

It was like this yesterday…I think we only had two pages of posts.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
10:00 am

If I can’t afford to pay, I don’t go. Even with wifey. Occasionally, after I done made a couple of mortgage payments and a car note, my bread may be a little light. I’m trying to hold on till next payday without touching the savings. She may want to go out and I’m like “Baby, I’m broke”. This is her thing: “I got money…..I’ll pay, let me take you out.” I’m always hesitant to except because I know how this plays out. Once we get out and I order a few double XO’s (15 bucks a piece), she be like “how many of those you plan on having?”….”Dayum, you gonna get an appetizer and an entrée?” I can’t spend freely on her dime. I got to get her approval to a certain degree. Although I appreciate her effort, I find the entire experience degrading, humiliating and emasculating. Consequently, I don’t want her to pay nor contribute. I need to have my own bread so I can pay for everything. If not, I ain’t going.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
10:05 am

Good morning. Who pays is one of those tricky situations for me? In general, I would be on team “he pays” BUT I also agree that the person who asks should pay. If she’s woman enough to ask, she should be woman enough to pay. ALSO, there are times when I just really don’t like a dude and sometimes that can go either way. I can let him pay just to take advantage OR I can pay to send the message that I don’t need jack from him. As you can see, I’m all over on this one.

Button

January 22nd, 2014
10:06 am

Leggs – there is a law that states that the man is to pay for ALL dates unless otherwise noted. If you have no money, you don’t need to date. period. I know women lib has played a huge part in women paying for dates but not all women are on board with it.

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
10:06 am

Dus – Dang, even after all that time together she’ll still monitor what you spend when she pays? When you’re paying, does she order all that extra stuff?

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
10:08 am

If i’m out with a male friend and I want to ensure he doesn’t have any crazy ideas, i’m definitely paying for myself. Shole don’t want anyone to think that because they paid that I like them like that or that any sexual pay-back is happening down the road. lol

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:13 am

First let me say, I’m surprised at Diva…she’s “around” our age, and our generation KNOOOOWS, well most of us, that WE DON’T PAY and we don’t play that. As I’ve said a gazillion times on here, I wasn’t bred to take care of a dude. And if I gotta, I’m going without. I just hate somewhere in time things reversed. Cause really, a good dude wouldn’t dare allow his woman to pay. And an even better dude wouldn’t feel right about it.

I’on do cheesy….and cheesy for me means, playing the “my turn, your turn” game….ain’t happening. I’m not just typing words. I mean that to my core. Calling (i.e. hounding) and paying/taking care of a dude AIN’T EVA happening for me. Don’t get me wrong, (and like I’ve said as well), I’m good hooking you up every now and then for being the good dude you are :mrgreen: but all this “feeling guilty” cause a dude is doing his job?? Please…miss me with that foolishness. What I just hate about (some) women is the fact that they don’t even know it was put in him, as a man, when man was created, to do all the things we’re now asking “should we feel guilty” about….it’s his job. God gave it to him. I’on care what nobody says, I don’t care if a man wasn’t necessarily “taught” this, if you be the woman you SHOULD BE, oh he’s gon’ be the man God made. Being the woman you should be, he can’t help it. Pursuer, nurturer, care taker, the head, the leader…all of these things God placed in man. Shoot, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
10:14 am

Button we’ll use your law, and with your law, you’re happy with going to Krystal, because that’s all he can pay for (LOL)

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
10:15 am

DuShawn ~ when you put it that way, I can see your pout (lol).

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:15 am

Now, if I’m just “hanging out” with friends, then I pay for mine and you pay for yours….oooor, we’re cool and you get it one time and I’ll get it the next. But trust, that’s only in the scenario where we’re just buds.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
10:16 am

We complement one another like that. She likes to save, I like to ball. Even when I’m paying she’s a cheap date. She will 2 for $20 your azz to death. I often tell her, you get what you pay for….this top shelf diznic I consistently sling is costly.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:16 am

Oh, and being just buds, if it’s my turn and you run up a likka tab, you gon catch that part of it. Unless we both drinking, I’m not paying for your $50 beer/liquor portion.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:18 am

She will 2 for $20 your azz to death. I often tell her, you get what you pay for

Yeen never lied. I’m all about saving and being able to fund the things I need to fund or do, but when I go out or want something, I wanna do what I want, with no thought about skimping. That’s not limited to food. That include “things” as well. And if I can’t get what I want, then I don’t settle for less than. I wait.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
10:19 am

I need to have my own bread so I can pay for everything. If not, I ain’t going.

@Du…u speak the truf…me too, i wont do it.

The thing with the ladies is ,when its them with the money..they make u really know it…

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
10:19 am

Button – “there is a law that states that the man is to pay for ALL dates unless otherwise noted…”

Could not have said it better. I agree completely.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
10:20 am

There is the school of thought that basically says, from a man’s perspective, that if she attempts to pay and genuinely wants to pay, that’s her way of saying “Uuum, this fella ain’t bad. Might wanna keep his azz around a while. Caint really tell HIM that, so I’ll pay for a few things here and there, maybe he’ll be sharp enough to get the hint. I hope.” Some guys see this and arrive at that conclusion, rightly or wrongly.

But, ladies let’s just tell it like it is. If you get to a second or third….date with a fella, it’s because he is interested. If he has no interest, he won’t go out and spend money on you, or anyone else that he’s not interested in, for that matter. Now, the problem for you, is, you don’t know if the interest is actually in YOU, or your stuff. Because we’ll pay either way. An even bigger problem for women, or, should I say, an even more complex problem for women, would be the situation where he starts out with an interest YOU, but after a brief while, looses interest in YOU, but still wants your stuff. And by the way, no guy will ever go out with you, unless he wants to bend you over. So, that’s a given. In other words, he’ll never ask you out unless he wants to pull your dress up (Obviously, a blind first date would not qualify). it’s difficult for some women to tell what his intensions are. One good way, since there are no sure, bona fide ways to tell, is to gauge how well he listens and remembers what you say. How engaged is he in the conversation. Here is a MAJOR key to doing this, does he ask follow up questions, given your answers to HIS questions. Because, if he does, you can be fairly certain that he is interested in YOU, in addition to being interested in pulling your dress up (He wants your dress up as soon as possible).

So, a guy paying?, says he wants to get a whiff, that’s a given. But, how engaged in conversation, listening, follow-up questions…often, is a given that he is interested in YOU as well. Any guy that asks you out and expects you to pay half or part, ain’t sh!t!! Don’t go out with him again, and if he asks why tell him that “ Yo azz wanted me to pay half or part of the tab last time. You ain’t sh!t. And yo mama ain’t worth a damn either!! And yo daddy is a drunk, cheap, inexpensive, three and four timing shyster from way back, as well!!” Hell.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:21 am

The thing with the ladies is ,when its them with the money..they make u really know it…

I don’t, cause we ain’t gon ball on my money. We can be married and put it together, but long as we ain’t married, ummm we ain’t balling on my money. Therefore, I don’t have a thing to throw up at you :)

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
10:22 am

@Du…this top shelf diznic I consistently sling is costly.

@lol:…!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:23 am

That’s my .02 cents for today :mrgreen:

disco

January 22nd, 2014
10:27 am

Random – my son will be graduating soon with his master’s. don’t judge me but I told him I am not going to any more graduations after this. I hate graduation ceremonies. Wasting perfectly good vacation time for some boring mess.

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
10:30 am

disco – Congrats to your son!

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
10:32 am

Disco, you just mean, ( I agree with you) but you still mean (LOL) I didn’t even attend my own graduation after High school.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
10:33 am

Re dates: dude asked me to dinner Monday night. I initially replied with maybe. Call me later. He called me later and I didn’t feel like it. Tuesday he asked again. I declined again. Lol. at this point I’d give up on me but he won’t. I told him way back he’s got to up his game from dinner. Dinner really is for folks who want to talk to one another (i.e. get to know one another). We cool but I don’t want him so he needs to find an alternative way to entertain me. Sitting across the table from someone for an hour to two hours can be torture when you ain’t got nothing to talk about. Lol.

Slim – thanks but what about me? Airfare, time off that could go to better use (lol), going to a city that I’d rather not visit for various reasons. Dude is wasting my time. Maybe I should make him get me a graduation gift to make up for it.

Coach

January 22nd, 2014
10:41 am

If you call up a women and invite her out, then you are paying. Bottom line. Now its up to you to plan out where to go and what to do according to your budget.
They have very good inexpensive places that are nice where you can go. You can go to an expensive place it just all depends on what you want to do.
Now if you go out, and the women orders two steaks, one to eat there and one to take home, Make it Clear to her that you will not pay for not tom-foolery like that.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
10:44 am

Coach what about when the woman calls and drops those subtle little hints?

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
10:44 am

“And by the way, no guy will ever go out with you, unless he wants to bend you over. So, that’s a given.”

So, what happened to this sentiment → “Never set out to wine & dine for the sole purpose of pulling her dress up and getting a whiff at some point.”

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
10:46 am

Congratulations to your son, disco! Major accomplishment.

Coach

January 22nd, 2014
10:49 am

@Single and Happy

It really depends on your budget and level of interest. If you have some extra money and are interested then take her out and observe her, if you dont have the money then let her know going out on your ticket is not feasible at this time and you will contact her and let her know when its good for you.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:49 am

Now if you go out, and the women orders two steaks, one to eat there and one to take home, Make it Clear to her that you will not pay for not tom-foolery like that.

I’m all about chilvary and taking care of your woman (cause I know that it comes back four-fold from a woman that truly appreciates…trust), but that ain’t got nothing to do with letting a woman take advantage of you. No a man should be subjected to “paying for stuff” cause he’s paying. I’d tell ole girl, you getting one steak, and act right or else it will be chop steak….lol But naw, she wouldn’t be getting a “to-go” plate on me (if I were a dude), all the while eating at the table. That’s greedy and using folks.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:51 am

But….if you’re over 35, then you should be able to spring for a nice date. I didn’t say expensive, I side nice. If you cannot, and again over 35, you need to go sit down somewhere and get it together first!!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:51 am

That’s .04 cents huh?

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
10:53 am

disco – This guy sounds persistent. Years ago, my plan was to ask only once. If she accepted, and I felt something, I’d ask again. Fortunately for me, they all agreed to see me the first time. Hell, they may have been disappointed afterwards, but they DID agree the first time. Had any of them declined, for whatever reason, they would not have been asked again. There were a couple of occasions where she declined, but suggested another time, or, declined, but asked that I call her to arrange something else. At least in those instances, she wanted to, but was unable to, at the time I wanted. Which was just fine. Never had a woman say “no” and leave it at that. Cause if they had, I would have done exactly THAT. Left it alone. I’ll pursue you, but I won’t chase you, if that makes any sense.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
10:54 am

Morning All!!

Hey Disco!! Congrats to your son and congrats to you on a job well done raising such an amazing young man! As for attending graduations, yeah they are boring. You said you were going to this one and he’s your only child, so his graduations are the only ones you are obligated to go to as far as I’m concerned. So unless he goes for a PhD, you can chill!LOL!!

On topic – You all have heard my stance on this before. Dutch is not a date. Yes, the proper way things are understood is that whomever does the asking does the paying. First few dates it’s all on him, I never asked a guy out unless we were already dating. I don’t even like doing the tip thing, especially since folks don’t do cash much so usually the tip would be added in and charged to a card. I don’t like this “chipping in” thing, not elegant. I will pay for the ENTIRE meal or BOTH the movie tickets, like that. And yes, once we get established I will do that, no doubt. Now if I wasn’t feeling a dude like that, I would not pay or go Dutch to send some type of message – I just didn’t go out with him. I can hang with platonic friends or coworkers, but if you were “feeling” me and I was not, I declined all offers. Never was that hungry for a free meal either.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
10:55 am

That’s MY .04 cents and I’m sticking to it :mrgreen:

Coach

January 22nd, 2014
10:57 am

@Celisea

It just depends on what you consider nice. My grandma really likes piccadilly, so to her thats nice. Some people consider Red Lobster really nice. I have been to Ruth’s Chris and my fries came out cold and my steak wasnt cooked the way I said even though some folks would consider that a nice place.

A nice place to me would include Agave on BLVD, Pizza Vesuvius on Edgewood, Kiku For Hibachi, Or Tin Lizzy’s on Memorial for drinks.Corner Tavern is nice too in East Point for shooting pool. This is what I like, others may consider these places as below their standards. Its really a personal preference.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
10:58 am

If she orders two steaks,one for immediate consumption and the other for later?

Well..,plan on putting her to work so when you make her hungry later,she can dine on ur dime…Again! :lol:

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:00 am

Reio – dude knows I’m funny acting. He’s got a better chance of me accepting if he catches me in the car or out and about. If I’m inside chilling it’s not likely that I’ll get dressed to step out to meet him. It is what it is.

hey kimmie!!!!!

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
11:00 am

Leggs – “Never set out to wine & dine for the sole purpose of pulling her dress up and getting a whiff at some point.”

What I intended to have this interpreted as was, “I” never set out….. It’s akin to saying. As a child, I didn’t put a tooth under my pillow. Never believed in the tooth fairy. Read “I” never believed in..

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
11:03 am

Coach – I love Agave’!! That’s one of my favorite spots in the city.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
11:03 am

Coach – Definitely. Remember, “nice” does not equate to expensive. My point was, a grown man should be able to comfortably have a nice evening out. And a grown man should know the kind of woman he’s dating. Shoot, I can roll with Picadilly, Red Lobster, a pizzeria, a pool hall, you name it.

Me and the kid’s dad would shoot pool all the time. I’m not that great, but he was my boo, so I enjoyed it for him. Please no one run with that….I did it for him, and yet enjoyed it.

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
11:03 am

Morning All!

I believe that a man should pay. That said, when I asked a man on a date, I did pay because I asked. He actually called me on it because he had his card in his hand when the server took my card. I explained to him that although I believe that generally a man should pay, I asked so I paid.

Disco- No judging here! Congratulations! I did laugh at your post though, because I was waiting for my own graduation to end, lol.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
11:04 am

disco – Well, if he knows you’re “funny acting”, I guess he knows he should expect the unexpected. Mo power to him. Maybe he has a chance, and knows it.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
11:06 am

Cel – Go on girl and make it a nickel!!LOL! I agree with what you’ve said though.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:08 am

random: guys have you ever been interested in a girl who isn’t interested in you the same way? Scratch that. I’m sure you all have been at some point in time. How do you feel about that same chick discussing the guy that she is interested in with you? Do you shut it down quick? Do you go along with it? Do you offer advice? Do you just straight block? Do you admit that it has you feeling some kind of way?

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
11:11 am

I agree whoever asks for the date should pay.

Reio ~ I understand and knew you would say “I,” but your comment was “no” guy. You are a guy right (lol). I gotcha…

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
11:13 am

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
11:17 am

disco – Not experienced with this. But if I’m with her and she starts talking about some other guy that she is interested in, I’d go along with it, and suggest, in my own way, that this fella is the one she needs to be seeing, not me. I’d never be rude, interrupt, and tell her to shut up about that guy. However, that would be our last date, by the way. Her azz would get dropped. Same night/day.

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
11:18 am

Celisea- “Please no one run with that….I did it for him, and yet enjoyed it.” Run with it? I don’t have an issue with it. I agree that you should try things that your mate finds enjoyable; that’s called compromise and not being selfish.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:21 am

Reio – I asked because I see that with “friends” all the time. One friend is way more into the other and the other is always checking for someone else. Both men and women seem to often think that if they stick around they may eventually “win” by default.

Atl – I was invited to see lone survivor. Wasn’t familiar with it. told dude I would look into it. he asked about it again and I was like “heck naw I ain’t going to see that mess”. What’s funny is this same dude will follow me to foreign films in polish/French/whatever that he has zero interest in. I say – shame on him. Lol.

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
11:23 am

Disco- meh. If you were in a relationship with him, I would say you should have seen it…

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:28 am

Atl – I’m not in a relationship with him but even if I was there’s just some stuff I’m not going to do – not even for the team. I enjoy movies too much to sit through a movie that doesn’t interest me at all when I could be across the hall watching something I want to see. I don’t do sports so I’m not watching the game. I may sit in the same room while he watches the game but he bet not expect me to participate in his excitement re the game.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
11:29 am

Leggs – You’re right. I did say “no” guy…And I am a guy. I was talking about guys in general, and me specifically. I don’t recall going on multiple dates with women that I also didn’t want to bend over. Hell, if a relationship was to develop, I would also need to be attracted to her, in that way, as well.
Can’t imagine going on multiple dates with a woman, and feeling no attraction to her. She may be the most kind, articulate, loving woman in the Milky Way galaxy. But , if I have no desire whatsoever to pull her dress up? Guess what? “Ain’t gon be no relationship.”

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
11:30 am

discussing the guy that she is interested in with you?……..heyalll nawwww!!!! How you gone use my time with you to discuss the next man. My advice was always the same concerning another dude. “You’re making a mistake. He’s a pusazz dude, I’m hatin on him, you need to get rid of him and let me hit that.”
Re: Paying for Dates, when I was dating I almost always paid for meals or events, but I used to get them back on hotel rooms, “Baby, go head and find a spot, check in, get comfortable and text me the hotel and room number.”

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
11:32 am

MsAtl – :mrgreen: And it’s funny cause he’s been the less “booghie” of them all. And for the mindset we both had back then, we had a blast most of the time, during the good years. Things went south when I grew up and got a clue…and he didn’t….hahahahaha Otherwise, it was fly by the seat of our pants, from swanky to hole in the wall, to cheesy (sometimes), to naughty.

No regrets.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
11:33 am

whoever asks for the date should pay.

That’s the bottom line….however some folks still don’t get it.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
11:33 am

Disco – A good friend of mine used to do that, talk about other dudes she was seeing to a guy friend of hers. At first he couldn’t really do anything about it because he was married, then going thru a divorce. He finally was free and clear, but she was still not seeing him as anything other than a friend. I mean she would go into detail with him like she would a girlfriend, talking about how big a dude’s thang was & what he did with it, stuff like that. Finally he had enough and told her he didn’t want to hear anything else about this other dude’s wang. Something clicked with her, and she accepted his invitation of an official “date” and not just the usual hanging out they would sometimes do.

They are now married with 2 kids. :)

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:33 am

D – so in short, you are the blocker? lol. did it make any difference at all if the dude she was into was one of your boys? Did you try to hype him up or did you block against him too?

LeeH1

January 22nd, 2014
11:34 am

Gender equality is wonderful except in dating. women used to not be able to get good paying jobs or paid on the same level as men, and so depended on men to squire the ladies about.

Now that men and women are on an equal basis, and when often the women make more money than the men do, gender equality just doesn’t seem to have caught up to the changes of financial equality. End result: women would rather stay single than date guys who make less money than they do, and can’t pay for their dates in a manner in which they are entitled.

Women marry up the financial ladder, not down. Dating simply shows where the man is on the totem pole.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:34 am

Kimmie – wow. I thought it was just a story to tie in. didn’t expect nuptials at the end. You just never know.

Button

January 22nd, 2014
11:36 am

Single – Krystals have a mean chilli pups ohhh wee good!

It’s an age old question of who pays and when do women start paying for dates. I’m a firm beiliever that men should pay for all dates and when it becomes a real relationship then if the women chooses to she can spring for dates, I know I do. I have absolutely no problem taking any man I’m in a real relationship out for dinner/breakfast/lunch/movies etc etc bc we’re in this together. Now if we’re just kicking it/ hooking up or what have you – aint know way I’m opening my wallet. A real relationship is about give and take. I believe in share and share alike.

Button

January 22nd, 2014
11:39 am

disco – congrats to your son! gone head and support your son by attending his graduation. He will be proud if you do.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
11:40 am

That’s the bottom line….however some folks still don’t get it.

Hahaha, my time to exit.

Before I leave I’ll say, us classy women not only “get it”, but we get it and with no quams. Sorry if one can’t “pull” like the rest of us. Sorry if you’ve been relegated to sponsorship-dom (can I say that)and supporting ya boo. He’s no doubt sponsoring some other chick that require, and have standards. That’s the money he could be spending on you. Some of us are above that….

“Sigh” and exit!!!

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
11:40 am

LeeH1- I date guys who make less money than me and I would marry a guy who made less money than me if all other things were great. However, I am not going to waste my time with a man who is intimidated by a woman who has her own mind and uses it. I will not dumb down to satisfy anyone’s ego (man or woman).

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
11:43 am

Disco – YOU didn’t expect it? Well I didn’t expect it either!! I was kinda friends with both of them, but I thought they would always be platonic cause he was a bit of a dog. He got his stuff together though. I was blown away when she called and told me they were dating, then told me they were getting serious and next thing I know he’s calling me asking me to find out her ring size cause he was taking her to Aruba and asking her to marry him!!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
11:43 am

Oh, maybe cause I don’t (have to) ask for dates. Ooooh, now I get it. Hahahahaha. Like I said, no calling, hounding and asking for dates. I’m the askee not the asker. But yeah, guess that makes sense then…folks that asks should pay.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:44 am

Lee – I ain’t balling but I really don’t prefer to date a guy who makes less ESPECIALLY if he’s supporting other folks with that less. Still, a little bit less, no biggie. A lot less, we might have a problem.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
11:44 am

disco – Personally, I’ve never been in that situation, but if she chose one of my potnahs, I would help that happen. More power to him. If I can’t get it, that’s the next best thing. I would suggest however, that she allow me to test drive that azz, so I can honestly give her a glowing endorsement when I speak to my homie. I mean, I can’t recommend something I have no firsthand knowledge of. That’s false advertising and quite frankly threatens my integrity.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:45 am

Kimmie – that’s what’s up. she got a trip to aruba, a ring, and a husband. Old girl was on her game. Lol.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
11:46 am

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/teen-partner-43-died-consensual-sex-act-article-1.1587371

How does this happen? The mother was home? The teen called the mom and the mom called the police to the home? Huh? Was the 16 year old living on her own or did the girl call her mother from her cellphone upstairs in the bedroom? Choking and cutting? There’s some perverted folk walking amongst us. If you need to choke or be choked to “get off,” please bypass me!

Sorry, just ranting.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
11:48 am

D – well you go. In my experience men block the hardest when it comes to their boys or their brothers. I did have one guy friend eventually hook me up with a friend of his. It took for me to befriend his wife before he became that open minded. Lol. we joke about it now. (he, I and his boy – his wife was never hip to the fact that he tried to holler).

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
11:50 am

Button ~ what is a chili pup?

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
11:50 am

Leggs- That is some crazy mess!!!

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
11:52 am

Leggs – I know you asked Button, but a Krystal chilli pup is a mini chilli dog. They are good too!

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
11:53 am

Disco…it depends on the type of gal…some chics will mouth that likeness for another dude in ur presence because they’re comfortable with you…

I dont see a random chic saying that to me.

Whenever I stuck around a chic that was not responding the way I wanted,it was because I could see an opening.

If a chic is accepting my dates on the regular and Iam paying,I got a shot…Period!

…..the timing maybe a lil off,she ain’t closed her other deals etc but as long as we going out on dates,it means she is comfy with my company.

I think some men got better game than others.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
11:54 am

OH, thanks kimmie!

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
11:58 am

Any gal that asks for a date from potential suitor is desperate!
@Disco

Button

January 22nd, 2014
11:58 am

Leggs – it’s a small hot dog – mini dog. very tasty.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
11:59 am

:lol:

Note to self: Whatever you did…do it more often.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
12:00 pm

ex – some would take that stance. I don’t. some take the stance that anyone who does online dating is desperate or anyone who asks their friends to set them up is desperate. I don’t. in life you have to go for what you want. Sure you can sit back and wait in the cut (like some gazelle with a death wish) or you can go be about yours. Call it desperate if you must.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:02 pm

:mrgreen:

Please grow up, boo. You and a couple of others (probably you too) ONLY come one to cause a stir. Me and my opinion is me and my opinion. All the sniffing around and coward hits don’t do a thing. At least I’m not yellow bellied though. I’m not gon drop hints…Imma say it. Rather, Imma past by your posts….unless you sniffing around my fantabulousness!!!

Trust not running, just got better things than to pay some mind some ole coward hater.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:03 pm

If you need to choke or be choked to “get off,” please bypass me!

:shock:

~Leggs that is a bit much…but that’s a whooole other conversation/segue…

I’m waiting on a “daddy swissism” any moment now…

disco

January 22nd, 2014
12:05 pm

Ex – recently I declared that I was ready to start dating internationally. Naturally the first thing someone said to me was about dating Africans. I hate to admit that I immediately clarified that I didn’t mean Africans. Lol. now I have to narrow down the source of my prejudice against Africans. Messed up I know but it is what it is.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:06 pm

Imma past by your posts….

Promise?!

Dang and my birthday was 12/24….and I just got another gift. How sweet!! :mrgreen:

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:06 pm

POOF!!

I need one of those red “EASY” bottons from Staples…

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:08 pm

@Sassy – Promise?!

Stipulation being you QUIT sniffing around my fantabulousness, like you so cowardly looooove to do. I know, boo. Mezmerizing, ain’t it!!

Toodles, I’m moving on to better things.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
12:12 pm

Sassy – boy the things I could do with a staples easy button. lol.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:12 pm

Imma past by your posts….

Worth repeating…now own it…do it… :lol:

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:12 pm

Someone sniffing ’round my ankles only happens when I don’t play “go along to get along, generalized “I do that too, me too, you too?” posts. Hahahaha. All pre-packaged, generalized, all agree posts. Keep telling on yaself.

Happens EVERY single time! Won’t put out my light though. Sucks to be a coward you

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:12 pm

~disco…you and me both, chica..

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
12:16 pm

Disco, if I’m over her, and she’s my friend, then I don’t have a problem listening. But If I’m still trying to get in and she’s still talking to me then naw I don’t want to hear about those life problems.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:16 pm

Thought you were leaving…gone ‘head on…

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:17 pm

:mrgreen:

Magnetic draw is a mug….hahahahaha

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:18 pm

To me, that is… :mrgreen: Brang it….I ain’t NEVER scuuurred

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:18 pm

You know, I heard a preacher say over the weekend, leave sin alone….I DEFINITELY get it!!!

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
12:25 pm

Disco…I don’t see any problem with choosing not to date Africans…it’s a choice.

Folks must be selfish when dating…if u wanna be fair,u going to grow old and single and end up with 2 cats.

Like u said,a chic that does not go for what she wants will not get hers…

But on the flip side,desperation demands desperate measures! :lol:

You can’t have it both ways

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:25 pm

But oh wait…this is just a blog…blah blah blah…womp…womp…womp

Thought you were igging my posts…when are you going to start?! Get to it! :lol:

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:27 pm

Okay….W

Ut oh…let me hush

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:28 pm

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
12:32 pm

Sassy…..lol. You funny. I see yall got a little virtual cat fight. I’m waiting for a cyber tittie to pop out.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
12:42 pm

~Du…Thanks..

That so was not a cat fight…and you’re wrong for waiting on that cyber tit :lol:

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
12:44 pm

What wld happen if there is a blog meet and two chics with blog beef met..in person?

Would thru stare down at each other?

@Disco….to ur non Africans dating?

Me,if I were to do it again….I can see myself f**king black african american gals but I couldnt see myself marrying one.

I think they’re good in bed though…very creative! :lol:

See …it’s a personal choice for errbody

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
12:44 pm

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
12:54 pm

Mmm hmmm, thought so….and that’s all I’ll say about that. Say what, say what (Celisea’s ear on the screen)….thought I heard a pin drop….

Hahahahaha I gotta be dead before you slip past me.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
12:55 pm

Ex – now you really trying to start something. But, to instigate, I’d place a couple of bets. Lol.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
1:08 pm

Tsk…tsk…tsk….

Po thang…

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
1:09 pm

And while I’m gone, you’ll do a quick save and feign ignorance. But long as you know I know??? We square, boo!

You should be ashamed of yourself. An adult at that. But I know, I know….a great person, blah blah blah (ain’t that how YOU say it)???

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
1:10 pm

Ooops, you beat me to it….lololol Not quite feigning, but yeah go head and play it off. I’m good!!!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
1:10 pm

Toodles….

BB tomorrow…maybe :mrgreen:

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
1:14 pm

Aaaand we’re queing Violin Concerto No. 5….seems to still be needed.

*sighs and tosses hair*

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
1:24 pm

Howdy folks…

On topic: If I’m on a date, I’m paying, period. But that’s just how I roll. If I didn’t think you were worth springing for dinner, drinks, whatever, I wouldn’t be on a date with you.

Off topic: Going back to DuShawn’s post from yesterday about urinal etiquette… Dude, I’m with you. I don’t get it. I mean, even putting aside the fact that we’re all standing there with our w@ngs in our hands, some space is good just to avoid any unwanted pee splash. I don’t know about other dudes, but when I’ve got to go, it’s a pretty forceful stream. lol I try to stand back and angle it so as to avoid any splash-back from myself, so if you’re standing to my immediate left, you’re liable to get splattered. IJS… lol

Actually, the worst violation of urinal etiquette I’ve ever personally experienced was when I was in grad school. I had just started back to class after being gone for a few weeks after the cancer surgery (ahem — nut removal — ahem). So, I’m standing at the urinal and my professor (who I already thought was off) pulls up to the urinal right beside. This motherf__ker then starts in with “you’re looking awfully healthy…” :shock: Um, yeah, thanks for noticing… and stop looking at my d__k, please…. lol

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
1:25 pm

Time for a joke:

What type of band plays snappy music?

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
1:26 pm

Disco..when u coming to the A..we could ask Leggs to organise the blog meet.

u like sports bars Disco..or we go hang at a wing place?

actually,how bout u come down, superbowl wkend and the blog meets and we have a party…?

That wld be fantab! lol

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
1:30 pm

~daddy swiss….that must’ve been uncomfortable….first off, him looking at your junk was enough but to complement on it was too much.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
1:30 pm

~Leggs…a rubber band?

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
1:34 pm

Sassy — Very creepy, indeed.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
1:34 pm

SassyMe ~ yes, that was too easy!

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
1:35 pm

I did get an A in that class, though… so…. I guess he liked what he saw… lol

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
1:42 pm

Why does a quarter flip higher than other coins?

Button

January 22nd, 2014
1:42 pm

Swiss- dang man you got it like that son? to get an A based on visual sighting only LOL

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
1:45 pm

Button — Well, that’s for others to judge. Let’s just say, I’ve never had any complaints.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
1:48 pm

to get an A based on visual sighting only LOL

Ok-k-k?!

I hear ya daddy swiss…

~Leggs, you’ve got me on that one.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
1:49 pm

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
1:50 pm

Because it has an Eagle on it….ba da bing!

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:06 pm

Ex – believe it or not I’ll probably be in the A sooner than I want to be.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:17 pm

Anyone still here? Anyone working on complex Vday plans or will you just be winging it? no high end gifts on layaway? lol.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
2:22 pm

I’m here. VDay is a crock. I’ve always felt this way. No need to spend all that money on flowers that will die in 2-3 days. A box of fattening chocolate isn’t necessary. Going to an overpriced restaurant is for the birds. Go to the grocery store together, plan your meal and go home and cook, have a drink toasting the two of you, put in a good movie (no porn) nestled against each other, then either go to bed and do the damn thing or go for the carpet burns. Now, that’s a good evening (rofl).

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:27 pm

leggs – it sounds like you got it all figured out. I’m with you on the flowers but a sister can always get with some candy. Plus I love chocolate covered strawberries. I’m totally against crowds though so the whole restaurant thing is a bust.

Carpet burn is no joke. I will never forget seeing my cousin’s back once. I swear there was no skin left. Not for the kid.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
2:28 pm

A box of fattening chocolate isn’t necessary.

Leggs – Speak for yourself!!

:lol:

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
2:30 pm

I like the white chocolate covered strawberries better than the regular chocolate….So anyone want to send me a box of Sherries Berries, let me know so I can give you the address lol

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
2:30 pm

I dated this guy once whose favorite “holiday” was Valentines day! We would always go to get a nice meal & dessert. And yes, much chocolate candy!

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
2:32 pm

Valentines day, BAH HUMBUG

Pssst slim what’s that address :-D

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
2:33 pm

Sorry guys (lol). I do not want a box of candy. Never wanted a box of candy.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:35 pm

leggs – you are entitled. I’m all for anything practical. As far as I’m concerned, candy is practical as long as it’s candy that I eat. A brother show up with a bag of butterscotch or some mary janes or something and I might have a problem. lol.

single – you now bah humbugging is my job. Go with the flow. Buy a chick something this valentine’s day.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
2:35 pm

Slim/Disco – Chocolate covered strawberries are one of my favorite things in life!LOL!! I used to swear by only the white chocolate ones, but there is something about berries and milk/dark chocolate together that is fantastic as well. Guess that’s the foodie in me!

I actually make some killer ones, if I say so myself. When I was selling cakes, I would do strawberries too, for gifts and parties.

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
2:40 pm

“I like the white chocolate covered strawberries”

Slim — Okay, if you insist, yes you can cover me with strawberries. lol

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
2:40 pm

Disco, I’m trying, waiting on the address (LOL)

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:41 pm

Slim – I’ll let you (and swiss) have that one since white chocolate has never been my thing. Now (swiss – lol) I suppose I can always get with a little vanilla but white chocolate – nah….

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:42 pm

Well hell single if it’s like that I can break you off with a P.O. Box. Lol.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
2:42 pm

no high end gifts on layaway?

Not on layaway…lol

Well…since V-day is on a Friday I’m thinking about doing a lil sumthin, sumthin. Saw some cute lingerie in the mall this past weekend…so who knows.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
2:43 pm

disco ~ I wish I could get my hands on those Rum Lifesavers. I don’t think they make them anymore. Butterscotch is good, but I would love some Rum Lifesavers.

disco ~ we are co-chairing the bah humbug committee. I’ve been saying bah humbug to things for years now. Once in a blue moon, I might say “drats.”

Single ~ are you bah humbugging because you need to buy a few gifts to keep your rotation happy (that is if you have a rotation)?

daddy swiss

January 22nd, 2014
2:46 pm

disco — I might be white chocolate on the outside, but if you lick your way to the cream filling, it’s all vanilla. lol

Uh oh, I’ve fallen off the wagon, it appears… lol

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
2:46 pm

Leggs, I don’t do a rotation that require gifts :-D FWB don’t do gifts. When gifts are involved there is no rotation.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:49 pm

Sassy – I was also thinking about upping my lingerie game. I’ll be the first to admit that that is something I don’t really check for when single.

Swiss – sorry. I just can’t get past the white chocolate, don’t care what warm velvety goodness is waiting in the center. lol. okay. I’m bout to stop playing now.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
2:49 pm

“Go to the grocery store together, plan your meal and go home and cook, have a drink toasting the two of you, put in a good movie (no porn) ………” Shiiid, that’s a muffuggin regular Wednesday. Sounds good in theory, but won’t work in practice. I mean, my ole lady would settle for that, but that’s not what she would prefer. If you know what I know, you better buy them overpriced azz flowers and have them delivered to her job (so all the manless female co workers can envy). Preparing a meal at home could work, but don’t ask her to help and it must be laid out five star restaurant style. Ideally, you should find a nice, small, intimate spot, off the beaten path with dinner and a band. There are several in the city if you know where to look. Personally, I was never a fan of Valentine’s Day. It’s just another pagan holiday to fatten capitalist pockets. Men always get screwed on Valentine ’s Day (unfortunately, not literally). It pressures you to spend money that you may not have, just to get some azz that you already got.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
2:52 pm

And I’m waiting for the blog gents to all chime in with “amen” and “hallelujah” and “sho you right”……

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
2:52 pm

FWB don’t do gifts. Then where the heck is the benefit (lol).

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
2:54 pm

Leggs – I’m not a big fan of candy but like disco said, it it’s something I do like then i’m all for it. But I enjoy a great touching card with maybe a handwritten something in it by the giver. ;-)

Single – What are you going to write on the attached card for me?

dswiss – :lol: That’s more like an uh-oh oreo since you’d be covered in strawberries. More like berries and creme :oops:

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
2:54 pm

just to get some azz that you already got. – Cracking up! I feel you.

Guess my post would probably resonate more with those who aren’t living together or married (lol).

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
2:55 pm

“FWB don’t do gifts. Then where the heck is the benefit ?…….”on her forehead, running down her cheek, hopefully not in her eye.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
2:57 pm

Disco..doesn’t superbowl come earlier than vday?

What u got planned?

Party at ur crib?

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
2:58 pm

Slim if I told you that, it would spoil some of the surprise,

Leggs, FWB and suga daddy are different, FWB means you’re just having sex. Suga daddy means you’re having sex for a price, gifts included. So the benefit is me :-D

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
2:58 pm

I’ll be the first to admit that that is something I don’t really check for when single.

~disco—Who are you telling?…that was the last thing on my mind when I was solo. Now it’s a different story… I’ve even gotten a few pieces that are his favorite color…

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
2:59 pm

Leggs, that doesn’t even work when your not married or living together. It only works when you’re single and aint got nobody (LOL)

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
3:00 pm

I was also thinking about upping my lingerie game

disco – I am in the process of doing an underwear overhaul. Just bored with my old stuff and want to upgrade. It’s making a difference in how my clothes look. Also, I am donating the bras to this organization that’s collecting them. They said bras are the most needed yet least donated clothing item.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:00 pm

DuShawn ~ :lol: :lol: I knew the answer would be along those lines, just wasn’t sure how it would be delivered!

Single ~ I was playing with the “benefit” comment. I’m aware sex is the benefit.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:06 pm

D – Let me reflect on benefits. I once had a continuing ed class paid as a benefit. I think the class was $1800. I’ve had weekend getaways as part of the benefit. Not sure of the total expenditure but I recall the hotel rooms being about $300/night plus transportation and all my eating, drinking, shopping and pocket money. You definitely cannot skimp on benefits. ijs.

Ex – I don’t do sports. Not even the superbowl.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
3:06 pm

Actually, last Valentine’s Day wifey sent some balloons and Chocolate Strawberries to my office. The females here were jockin. I felt weird and slightly embarrassed. Really, I didn’t know how feel. It just was strange; everybody that passed my office, stopped, looked and had a comment…..”DuShawn…..somebody loves you” Im thinking: “GTF outta here and mind your business.” I was appreciative of the gesture, but the unsolicited attention was unwanted.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
3:07 pm

Suga daddy means ur pricing ur coochie just like the street hustlers…u just white collar with ur same hustle.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:10 pm

Ex – no sugar daddy means some old man needs to stay in his lane. If he chooses not to, well, then shame on him.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
3:10 pm

“You definitely cannot skimp on benefits.” One persons benefits are another person’s investments.
That ROI is inevitable, for most anyway…….you a little different.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
3:11 pm

The only reason I get my wife stuff on Valentine’s Day is cause she expects it. .Although, any card’s remarks are sincere and heartfelt, but I do it primarily cause she expects it. If they canceled Valentine’s Day, she “wouldn’t git sh!t.”

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:12 pm

Single ~ how the heck is that going to work if you “ain’t got nobody?”

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
3:14 pm

Kimmie- We need to get together and do some cakes…

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:14 pm

Disco, so you got that FIYA (LOL) that sounds like someone trying to extend the FWB into WFB (LOL)

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:15 pm

D – I’m a little different? I guess so when it comes to benefits. lol.

Single – before I comment, what’s WFB?

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:16 pm

Leggs, I mean that’s the way you think when you aint got nobody, anything for Vday will do. Now it also may work if that treatment happens all the time.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:17 pm

disco Wife with Benefits, you know you got it all now (LOL)

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
3:17 pm

Du – The only time I got something of substance on Valentine’s Day from someone other than my wife was, maybe, nine years ago. My daughter’s got together and sent me some stuff. I was shocked and very very surprised. They never did it before. They never did it again. What got into them nine years ago? I don’t know.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:20 pm

Single – okay. I’m working on that. I think I mentioned a friend whose resolution was to have a man by September. I’ve decided to one up her and joked that I’d be engaged by year end. Now, granted I don’t really really see that happening but nothing wrong with a little friendly competition (and wishful thinking – lol).

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
3:21 pm

Dus – I always wondered sending dudes things like that for holiday’s/birthdays. I figure that most men would feel some kind of way about it, especially something as ’seemingly femine’ as balloons or flowers. But hey, never know what you guys are into. Ya’ll want to feel special too.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:21 pm

Single ~ naw, that’s not the way you think when you don’t have anyone. That’s the way you think if you’re practical, understand the capitalism of Valentine’s Day and is appreciative of those little heart felt things that don’t necessarily come in a gift box. Anyone who wants “any old thing cuz it’s VDay” doesn’t value themselves and is not paying attention to the meaning behind “any old thing!”

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:22 pm

On new year’s I sent all of my best friends letters in the mail. They all called me talking about how much they cried. Hint – fellas – go cheap. Write letters. Heck, I’ll write your letters for you for $29.95. lol.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
3:27 pm

Some Old men go the street hustlers as well..
But old men with consistent bread prefer the solo sexentrpeneaur..and she can line other customers as long as she meets her schedule.

The markerting is better….and cash flow is more predictable

@Disco

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:29 pm

Just messing with you leggs :-D blog hugg :-D I’m really not into all that commercialism either.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:29 pm

Ex – I just watched the mack last night and I still don’t know what you talking about.

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:33 pm

I just watched the mack last night and I still don’t know what you talking about. LMAO

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
3:33 pm

Because economics and finance is not ur forte.

I am taking bout the economics of prostitution or suga daddying,as u prefer to sanitize it. :lol:

@Disco

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
3:34 pm

MsAtl – Only thing holding me back is having to work all day & then come home to my other fulltime job(hubs & kids). Before I married, I basically had a side catering business!

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:35 pm

Ex – that’s just it. the sugar daddy phenomenon has very little to do with economics or finance. It has much more to do with pride, ego and not wanting to let go of one’s youth. If it were really about economics and finance those old buzzards would find some old hens their own age and hold on to their money. At least hold on to a little bit more of it. lol.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:40 pm

It has much more to do with pride, ego and not wanting to let go of one’s youth. If it were really about economics and finance those old buzzards would find some old hens their own age and hold on to their money.= YEP!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
3:40 pm

They make lingerie for men?

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:42 pm

Mostly their ego….they really can’t “catch” anymore, so they let their wallets do the talking. Like Black Mamba used to say, who really wants the sweat from some tinsel tubes???

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:42 pm

Disco, you know with suga daddies usually being married, I know a lot of things I could be doing with that money instead of trying to take care of 2 homes (LOL)

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
3:43 pm

Kimmie- I know the feeling. I tried to save time and buy cakes before. My son complained that other people got one of my “mommy” cakes while he had to suffer with a store bought, lol. I also tried buying one for the ex (from Publix, which I think has good cakes) and he ate a small piece and threw it away because I didn’t spend my time making him one.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
3:43 pm

disco – the thinking is, “If I’m an old buzzard, why should I hold onto my money?” Can’t take it with them.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
3:43 pm

Disco….but u focusing on one side…the old man..the chic dies it for the money…and this ain’t an affair..so she ain’t stuck on one dude.

As long as the schedules of her high paying clientele ain’t clashing.

Preserving one’s youth? LMAO

Coochie ain’t got no age! :lol:

It’s All bout money and how much and often she getting it.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:44 pm

I think it’s called sexy underwear. If a man desires to wear lingerie he might be a cross dresser. I don’t known of any man who wants to wear lingerie.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
3:44 pm

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
3:45 pm

Leggs – When you wrote, “I don’t know of any man who wants to wear lingerie”, I read lingerie as Ling-er-ree :lol: Heyyyyy, two snaps and a twist!

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:46 pm

Leggs, Men can always catch!!!!!! Now whether are not they want what they catch, that’s a different storry (LOL)

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
3:47 pm

Disco- re your 3:20, I’m with your friend- I have to find a man by September. I have a formal event to go to in October, lol.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:48 pm

“Coochie ain’t got no age!” – but it sure loses it’s elasticity (lol).

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:48 pm

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:48 pm

Ex – you still making the wrong general assumption. Let’s say young chick has a sugar daddy. It ain’t nothing but a thing. She knows and he knows that he’s just there for financial purposes. Now she probably doesn’t have a “real” man but she’s got her real dude that she kicks it with. If she’s bout her game she lets dude know that he will not mess up the good thing she got going with her sugar daddy. Dude will agree to not get in the way because he ain’t trying to come out of pocket. It’s a win/win/win all the way around.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
3:49 pm

Ex is right. It’s all about the money with these sugar daughters. Those young VFW chicks are just one example of this.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
3:49 pm

I just wondered…I could be mistaken. I would have to go back and read. I was reading page 4 and thought I saw a dude say he was going to buy himself lingerie. Like I said, I was skimming, catching. Not worth me going back to read.

I sniggled though, when I came or thought I came across.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:49 pm

Single ~ I don’t think that’s a true statement. Men cannot always catch, just like women can’t always be caught!

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
3:50 pm

Cel – Satin/silk boxers, with a matching robe.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:50 pm

And, if a man was able to always catch, he wouldn’t need props to assist him. He would use his words, his aura, his mind. Sometimes, none of that will work, and he must use his wallet (lol).

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:50 pm

atl – this particular friend is at the bottom of the totem pole. Frankly if I was in her shoes I’d just run down to 7-11 and stand outside for a few minutes. I’d have a man with the quickness. When almost anything is a come up, I don’t see what the hold up is. lol.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:51 pm

“I sniggled though, when I came or thought I came across.” – you do realize that’s a loaded comment.

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
3:51 pm

Kimmie – Yean, I’m familiar with that….lol I was thinking “lingerie” when I saw that. Like maybe they crossed dressed or something. But again, I’m probably off the mark :mrgreen:

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:52 pm

Re words, aura, mind – when was the last time you had a really intriguing conversation with someone? Who was that person?

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
3:52 pm

Yeah…wasn’t tryna go “there”

Let me just hush…lol

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
3:52 pm

I’m gone back to looking for a handbag online

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
3:53 pm

And, if a man was able to always catch, he wouldn’t need props to assist him.

Leggs – Like blue pills & pumps

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:54 pm

“I don’t see what the hold up is. lol.” – Could the hold up be that no one has asked her out.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
3:54 pm

I know a lot of things I could be doing with that money……..Different strokes I guess…..I personally think that’s a great way to spend your money if you’re a old pops. I know I would prefer being pampered by some fine young obedient thang than traveling the world with some dried up, mean spirited, heffa that I love but no longer like and only with her because we’ve been together too long to leave. Typically that’s the case with suga daddy’s. Either that or they divorced/widowers and are truly off the chain. Those are the ones that really try to relive their youth. To them Viagra is a God send.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:56 pm

Celisea ~ I know, but it was funny to me.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
3:57 pm

kimmie ~ yeah, like blue pills & pumps (lololol).

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
3:58 pm

Leggs, both can always catch, but most of the time they don’t want what they catch. ask anyone that complaining about not having anybody, there is always someone that’s interested, they’re just not interested in them! And most use their wallet because just like here, there are women who think they must always pay.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
3:59 pm

leggs – the true hold up is that she has an extremely inflated sense of self and seems to be in denial about some very basic truths. She doesn’t have anything (well she have very, very little) but wants a man with a lot. I’m like you don’t need a man with a lot. Just a man with a little bit more than you. she doesn’t see my logic.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
4:01 pm

Du – yeah, that’s the thinking. They pretty much say “Hell, I’m an old buzzard. Got my retirement check, pension, social security, 401K savings…Just a few more descent years to live, may as well spend it on these dumbazz young chicks, cause I sure as hell caint take it wit me. Hell, might kick over next week, who knows.”

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
4:02 pm

Du, I’m not knocking it, I’m an advocate of people doing what they want to with their money. (If you like it, I love it)

Single & Happy

January 22nd, 2014
4:04 pm

Reio, yea you might have a heart attack trying to talk up on it. that’s would be just time wasted, you could have been getting it in before that attack (LOL)

disco

January 22nd, 2014
4:04 pm

Hold up. Dushawn. Reio. – y’all know some old cats with retirement checks, pensions, social security and 401K accounts? Does he own property? Does he consider himself active? Would he be interested in rollerblading? Hook a sister up????

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
4:04 pm

…..than traveling the world with some dried up, mean spirited, heffa that I love but no longer like and only with her because we’ve been together too long to leave.

Maybe she’s mean cause she’eon like you no mo!!!

This made me laugh like Horseshack…..lololol

I’m out….PEACE!!!

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
4:04 pm

Du – Yeah, a lot of older ladies would rather roll with some tenderoni with working parts, other than the mean-spirited, dried up old cheap turds they got at home as well! :wink:

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
4:06 pm

And these sugar daughters know that they don’t need much time with each buzzard. Once he is satisfied, she leaves and does whatever she wants, no strings attached. And some extra cash to boot. Some of the buzzards pay well. Hell, they don’t give a sh!t. IJS.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
4:07 pm

Du..I think these ladies don’t realize how more flexible the young necks are compared to the 45+ necks of older ladies.

When a man got the money,he gotta spend it on quality azz.

It’s a good stress reliever!
@Disco

and the money is good for the young chic with a sorry azz broke boyfriend

Win win!

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
4:08 pm

Smelling like mothballs, old smoke and cheap brown liquor!!

MsAtl

January 22nd, 2014
4:11 pm

Disco- “run down to 7-11 and stand outside for a few minutes” OUCH!

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
4:11 pm

Disco – Actually, I do. One of my potnahs/mentors fits that description. Bread, nice crib(on 15 acres nice), Cool as shid, that’s my dog. Although you and I have never met, I would advise him against getting with you. You just can not be trained. He does not need an animal that was raised in the wild and can hunt on her own. He needs a tame circus animal that is accustomed to doing tricks for peanuts.

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
4:12 pm

Kimmie..u jealous! :lol:

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
4:12 pm

think these men don’t realize how more flexible/resiliant the young dudes are compared to the 40+ older men.

Exiled – There, I fixed it for you!! LOL!!

:lol:

disco

January 22nd, 2014
4:14 pm

D – dang. That post sounded insulting and complimentary at the same time. lol. I see how you are. You told me earlier today that you are a blocker from way back.

kimmie

January 22nd, 2014
4:15 pm

Ex – Jealous of what?? :lol:

I’m out Gang!

Be easy!!

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
4:15 pm

Well, I was laughing again…even though I tyrna go home…..Horseshacking at MMeelo 4:07, but it wouldn’t go though

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
4:15 pm

Does he own property? Does he consider himself active? Would he be interested in rollerblading? Hook a sister up????

~disco—-NOOOO.. I don’t know why but I see you either pushing him down a hill or pushing him so hard tryna keep up with you he keels over anyway. IJS :lol:

When I lived downtown, one of my room mates liked to date older men and this was waaay before the “blue pill” came out so let’s just say there were certain limitations these men had… she knew it and preyed upong it. I used to ask her what she saw in them besides the obvious(money/gifts/”our” rent/etc.) and she said, “Hell that’s it..shiid he can’t do nothing else…and the one or two days a month his d!@& does get hard ain’t nuthin to worry about”.

We lost touch for some years and recently reconnected via social media and she married….to an older guy. I can’t…just can’t..

Exiled!

January 22nd, 2014
4:15 pm

Disco wld leave Du’s friend outta pocket!

Wrong customer. :lol:

Celisea

January 22nd, 2014
4:16 pm

Du..I think these ladies don’t realize how more flexible the young necks are compared to the 45+ necks of older ladies.</em.

Coooommmmeeedddyyy…..Night night

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
4:16 pm

disco – I know several old buzzards like that. Each one has multiple streams of income. And most of them own their homes out right, although, one of their wives died and left the house to the kids, after he dies. But, that’s why the VFW is so popular. These young chicks know what’s happening. They don’t talk much about it cause, one, some are a bit ashamed of what they are doing (Although they’ll lie and say they aren’t), and, two, if too many other young chicks find out, the competition will get too hot. They can come away with a few good bucks with minimal work, and they know it. These old buzzards are easy to please, and more than willing to pay. None are active. Rollerblading? “Is yo azz crazy?”

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
4:17 pm

disco – let me hit and I’ll put in a good word for you. Like I said earlier, I gotta sample the product to ensure its quality.

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
4:17 pm

Single ~ I still disagree. Not everyone can catch, but everyone can “try” to catch. If you don’t like what you caught and you throw it back, then you didn’t “catch.”

disco

January 22nd, 2014
4:18 pm

sassy – you heard me mention trying to figure out a way to finance living abroad. The right old “ready to die” man might be just the ticket. lol.

disco

January 22nd, 2014
4:18 pm

D – just own that you are a blocker. it’s okay. I’ve got a little bit of blocker in me as well.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
4:20 pm

VFW is so popular…….Don’t sleep on them VFW’s. I have been to some salmming partys at the one in Broward. Them old moms was at me with no shame. I mean steppin to me mackin. Some of them was fine as hell too.

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
4:21 pm

He needs a tame circus animal that is accustomed to doing tricks for peanuts. :shock:

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
4:23 pm

SlimNu – Trust me……the analogy is appropriate.

Reio

January 22nd, 2014
4:24 pm

DU – This is true. Ain’t just young sugar daughters there at the VFW. Some older ladies there too. Most just lookin for a good time. They’ll make a deal wit-cho azz too. Hehehe…

Leggs

January 22nd, 2014
4:24 pm

disco ~ I read that as a back handed compliment as well. But, I did laugh at it.

PEACE!

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
4:24 pm

The right old “ready to die” man might be just the ticket. lol.

~disco–Ain’t nothing wrong with good come up…one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel :lol:

SlimNu

January 22nd, 2014
4:26 pm

Dus – I totally get it but I was still like wooooow (In my Flava flav voice) lol

disco

January 22nd, 2014
4:26 pm

Sassy – exactly why I asked if dude was active or into roller blading. lol.

DuShawn

January 22nd, 2014
4:41 pm

Funny thing I met a few of my Old potnah’s young women. They fine as a mugg too. He made a couple of them give me their numbers. I took them and hid them deep in the phone. Real dudes know, you gotta keep some animals on deck. Just in case a playa potnah come in town and you need to show hospitality.

Adam

January 22nd, 2014
4:44 pm

I am late, I don’t get up until the afternoon anyway and work nights. (No I am not a vampire) I don’t mind paying for the first few dates, so long as a % of what I make is not expected of me to pay. Just because a man can spoil does not mean he should. I am not a sponsoring or sugar daddy type to do that for women, because then they like you for the WRONG reason. But if a woman wants to keep me around, she should show a great deal of effort too (No I don’t mean sex, not gonna say what because that’s cheating the game since so many consider dating a game). But I am enjoying single life and enjoy spoiling my pets, at least and most times know how to appreciate what I do, not feel entitled or expected.

Sassy Me

January 22nd, 2014
4:53 pm

Have a really good,warm evening everybody. Stay warm!!

Peace :mrgreen: