accessAtlanta

City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP
City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
City & State or ZIP

Should men be protectors?

I got a couple of text messages from my friend Felicia the other day. She was kind of freaking out because her new boyfriend did not “defend” her when they were out on a date recently. They were sitting in a movie theater when some jerk said something rude and a little threatening. Not only did her guy not say anything, he implied that she should watch herself with strangers.

Felicia is very traditional and she believes the man should take a leadership role as protector and provider. Needless to say, she is considering breaking up with this guy because she believes his character is lacking to let something like this happen.

I wonder if women today still think men are our protectors? Should a guy defend his woman’s honor in our so called modern society?

Ladies, is it important that you feel safe around the man you are dating? If he shows any kind of weakness, does it mean he is not a suitable mate?

Guys, do you hesitate to play the role of protector with women you date? Is it something that comes naturally to you? Do you embrace the leadership role?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

165 comments Add your comment

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
10:49 am

@kimmie I don’t understand women who do makeup while they are driving. I understand lipgloss at the stop light, ok fine. But full on makeup application and you aren’t even in park? :|

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
10:49 am

MMeello – Tell the truth and shame the devil, children women should be seen and not heard…lol

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
10:49 am

kimmie ~ that’s another thing on the road I don’t understand, putting on makeup. I think it’s one of the dumbest things a driver can do. I witnessed a woman applying mascara hit the back of a stopped Marta bus. I laughed and winched at the same time. Dumbcluck!!!

disco

November 20th, 2013
10:50 am

ex – mouth popping ain’t always about being loud. I can cuss a person out on the QT and still make them words sting just as much. loud is for show. now, don’t get me wrong, I’ll get loud if need be but one doesn’t have to be loud. frankly, I just talk a lot of trash. always have, likely always will. come from a long line of trash talking people. I think I told the story on here of my 3 year old son hollering out “book ‘em grandma” while my grandmother was playing cards. he was already practicing his trash talking. lol.

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
10:50 am

@disco oh no, I meant the guy that yelled the offcolor remark and couldnt even back it up when you got in his face. What a punk.

Reio

November 20th, 2013
10:51 am

disco – Well, I guess I’m one of those people that believes that if I’m supposed to go at, say, at exactly 2:37 pm, this afternoon? Well, guess what? I’m going at exactly 2:37 pm this afternoon. And there is nothing she can do to change that. Whether she is right there by my side or not.

Exiled

November 20th, 2013
10:52 am

Disco..I aint talking LOUD…I am talking of A LOT..

thought i mentioned that in the last post.

@Celisea..get off ur stereotype….of me.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
10:57 am

MMeello – My bad…sorry :) Lubs you still

disco

November 20th, 2013
11:00 am

reio – in that regard, I agree 100%. when it’s time to check out, it’s time to check out. no point living in fear. still, if I can, I’m going out swinging. lol.

ex – okay. maybe I misread/misinterpreted.

Durty Burd

November 20th, 2013
11:03 am

Good Morning!

Seems Diva left out some very important details, what did Felicia say to this dude? Having gone to the movies one thousand times I have never witness a random person saying something to another random person with some type of interaction.

If it is that important to her they should part ways. Dude was calm and maybe is in the relationship for the moment.

Single.. I’ve dated some that will react/speak before you can get the words out, some women don’t have 5 seconds worth of patience.

Me personally if you like to talk at the movies, we are only going one time, I go to the movies to watch and listen to the movies not try to have a conversation with you about the movie. While they are talking they ask you what did they say or what happen…GTFOH!

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
11:11 am

I’m not one with much patience….I’m working on that though :) As it relates to driving and road rage, I’m not crazy. I’ve tooted at folks distracted (mainly on the phone) and holding up the light or folks that take a millennium to turn the corner (lol), but I don’t go ham on folks cause ya just never know if they’re packing. Nope, don’t wanna lose my life over something senseless.

But yeah, folks on the phone or texting irks me to no end. I use to try to catch messages while driving, but I place the phone in the cup of my car until I can pull over. I might take a glance if I’m at the light and it’s ringing…you know to see who’s calling me. But I’m putting the phone back in the cup the moment the light turns green. Also, too many folks have lost their lives over something that could have waited or you could have pulled over to do. Now, if I’m getting messages and it’s rather urgent, I pull over and either call or finish.

Durty Burd

November 20th, 2013
11:22 am

Folks don’t like to pull over especially here in the ATL, they don’t even like to go to the next exit, these fools will go in the burm and back-up. Where they do that at?

Disco I dated a hard edge sista. Finer then fine, grew up fighting her 2 older brothers. We had an incident at a bowing alley where some folks about 5 of the other persuasion. One person the group issued those magic words blank go home, before I could turn around she was charging and cussing. I start running to get in front of her and the stand-off was on they had 3 girls and 2 guys. I believe they were surprise we started calling them names and was about 10 ft from them. The employees came out and stated they had called the po-po it was time to go…

She would most definitely take a bat to someone head, shot someone, or beat someone she had a quick temper.

daddy swiss

November 20th, 2013
11:59 am

Thanks, Leggs.

disco — To answer your earlier question, I’d want the chick that hides/stays put. Or, more accurately, gets the kids and gets them somewhere safe.

abc

November 20th, 2013
12:05 pm

I’ve never seen anyone in a movie theater get pointedly rude with a stranger unless provoked. For instance, I’ve provoked such rudeness by telling people to turn off their mobile phone or just plain shut up and let others enjoy the movie. Not surprisingly, they responded rudely. Perhaps also not a big surprise that I then fetch the theater manager and have them escorted out. Big surprise to the noisy mobile addicts, I suppose.

If you’re not prepared to confront people, don’t be confrontational. If you’re confrontational and not willing to actually confront those you’ve antagonized, don’t expect anyone to take punches for you. That’s just stupid. I’d do it for my wife, but some chick? Nah.

Once long ago I was witness to something similar: the chick I was with picked a fight with another chick, who shortly thereafter was pounding my chick’s head on a car fender in the parking lot. I said to the other chick’s guy, “think we should stop them?” “Nah,” he replied. “Mine’s winning.”

2CPTG©

November 20th, 2013
12:10 pm

anyone see Sons of Anarchy last night?

disco, you’d like the chic Jemma in that show…..she’s badass!

Exiled

November 20th, 2013
12:34 pm

Nah,” he replied. “Mine’s winning.”

:lol:

Durty Burd

November 20th, 2013
12:46 pm

ABC…I used to date a shorty she was about 5ft tall, normally easy going and fun loving, until I discovered her fatal flaw, one night when we had drinks. The fiesty cussing everyone is a b came out at random folks in the place, I was thinking to myself she is going to get me killed….Where did all this crazy come from? On the way home while I’m driving on the freeway…. She’s like are ready Zipppppppp! Dang-it! Crazy in bed too! :)

Durty Burd

November 20th, 2013
12:47 pm

Since all the ladies have left, fellas lets hijack the blog.

Durty Burd

November 20th, 2013
12:50 pm

I bet the following will speak or shall we say instantly react/say something during a situation…. Leggs, Celisea, SlimNu, Disco, YSIC, MsAtl (with diplomacy) SexyCool, and MissMoni… Did I miss anyone?

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
12:50 pm

I just got back, but go on and hijack.

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
12:51 pm

You forgot kimmie…she’s very diplomatic.

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
1:12 pm

I thought you were going to hijack this thing. I’ll leave…

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
1:19 pm

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
1:22 pm

daddyswiss ~ are you enjoying your day???

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
1:23 pm

YSIC ~ men can’t hijack this blog like we women can. Well, they can with talks of sports all day.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:29 pm

following will speak or shall we say instantly react/say something during a situation

Stereotyping much? Somebody raised somebody wrong to believe women should just shut up and if she don’t or what you feel “can’t”, she ain’t getting any, she’s “loud moufed” (as MMeello says it), she’s untamed, blah blah blah

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
1:30 pm

@Leggs I know! Probably because we outnumber them. At least it seems like we do. I don’t know some days.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:30 pm

I would LOVE to be a fly on the wall in the homes of dudes that hate women that talk. Any talking will be talking too much. The bedroom and the kitchen, huh?

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:34 pm

Yes, maLord

No, maLord

You’re right, maLord

I was wrong, maLord

Forgive me, maLord

Draw your bath, maLord?

Your vittles are acoming, maLord

Your slippers, maLord

Yes, you can have more than one ( :evil: ), maLord

You’re never wrong, maLord

:evil: :evil:

GOHWTM

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:38 pm

And nope, I don’t clown in the streets nor get in “situations.” Sorry, boo

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
1:41 pm

I read “Go On Home With That Mess” when I realized you were saying Get out of Here With that Mess. I think that’s what you were saying (lol).

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:42 pm

Yeah, I had to think about it…lolololol I wanted to use the recognizable version, but I’on cuss :)

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
1:42 pm

Yeah, I don’t clown in the streets either. Never air my laundry in public and I’ve never thrown a man’s clothing out the window. Has anyone here done that before.

O/T: In 2.5 more hours, I will be taking my first kick boxing class. I’m excited and scared.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
1:47 pm

Okay, yeeeears, as in EONS ago, I threw the kid’s dad stuff out the door and down the stairs. Just opened the door and tossed…lololol Another time I bleached all his new stuff SHE (his grandma/girlfriend) bought. Brand new…I bleached every bit of it. All of it. That woman (his grandma) couldn’t stand me cause I wouldn’t tolerate him walking all over me. She said he was a fool to keep coming back and getting that kind of treatment.

I’m sure some dude is gonna call me crazy. That was yeeeears ago. I’ve calmed down a whoooole lot and just walk away (said like the baldhead dude from Love Jones…laid back and collected)

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
2:01 pm

Well, Celisea, you did say you were a hellcat back then and didn’t take no mess from a man and you went from 0 to 60 with the quickness.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
2:05 pm

Yep, I’m nuuuuuthing like that now. I mean I quick on the draw sometime, but all that hellcat stuff is pretty much simmered and laid to rest. I don’t think a dude (as it relates to relationship stuff) could take me there. Now someone attacking me just sticks in my craw

When I say “grandma/girlfriend”, I only mean his grandma who had an unnatural affection for him. She’d go broke for him.

Anyhoo…enough about me…lol I’m gone back to work, I reckon

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
2:07 pm

@Leggs my mother has. After she emphatically poured bleach all over them, cut up his loafers and tossed them out the back window. We were on the 3rd floor of a New York City apartment building. She has also been known to stab/cause bodily harm to her husbands. Yes I said husbands with an “s”. I used to be crazy impulsive like that when I was younger but I just don’t have the energy and I see things way too logically now. I mean what do I look like wasting gas to go someone’s house late at night when it’s cold and confront them about some pictures on facebook and then I didn’t even like you that much anyway? I’m good in the comfort of my warm house watching Netflix. But that’s something she would do. With a boxcutter or knife. smh.

Exiled

November 20th, 2013
2:11 pm

@Celisea….so u kinda like in Church but still, like a recovering addict? :lol:

any mess seemingly popping may set u off in the church parkin lot….parishioners screaming and dashing inside,screaming ..”Hell!!,sister Celis is pounding deacon Johnson’s head to the pavement ..Help..”"..

church folks rush out… :lol:

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
2:12 pm

My sister threw my clothes out the window down into the alley, that’s my own experience with clothes being tossed. I never ran after a man, jumped on the hood of this car in a bathrobe, but I have been that friend who rode with you to slash a tire, key a car or just stalk. I went not because I condoned any of it, but she were to get caugh, I foolishly thought I could get her out of there in one piece and not have to bail her out of jail.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
2:14 pm

MMeello – Stereotyping much??

Single and Happy

November 20th, 2013
2:14 pm

Disco, on your earlier question. The other night, I was over my neighbor house, her daughter went to let the dog, out and started talking about the front door being unlocked. I was standing close to it, I told her if someone had rushed in, I would have tried to hold them off long enough for them to get out the back door, but they better be moving. Somebody needs to be able to tell the story.

I’m like Reio, except for the bury me part, hell have me a cheap funeral, cremate me, don’t throw all that money in the ground.

Exiled

November 20th, 2013
2:16 pm

Celisea..its a question?

meaning..are u out of it?

Leggs

November 20th, 2013
2:20 pm

hell have me a cheap funeral, cremate me, don’t throw all that money in the ground.

Single ~ I sat here thinking the same thing. I don’t need to be in anything elaborate. Cremate me and keep me on the mantle. Somewhere out in the open because I’m afraid of the dark.

Celisea

November 20th, 2013
2:22 pm

MMeello – I knew that…I was being a snot :)

We’re saved for real, as in for real (none of this playing mess) in my church. You won’t see anything popping off.

If you’ll not selectively read (and I say that softly), you’ll see I’m talking past experiences, mostly….”a long time ago” or “eons ago.” Don’t assume I’m any kind of way, but kind. Chile please, I’m grown, I wish I would be caught up in some mess. I ain’t gon be caught up in nothing. I will though, say what I think. I’m not scrapping though.

disco

November 20th, 2013
2:24 pm

we on crazy stories. let me think. lol. I think my baddest crazy move was when this cat was messing with me and an oldhead chick. after having words with her out one night I got him to come home with me. while he was asleep I went outside and cut the leather interior in his car (a blue caddy) and squirted hair dye all over the outside of the car. I then went back inside and got undressed and got back in the bed. to this day (and I know because we’re still cool and have laughed about the incident) he believes the other chick did it.

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
2:25 pm

@disco I bow down to you on that one

disco

November 20th, 2013
2:26 pm

I was also on hand when my cousin threw a hammer down through her boyfriend’s tv (one of those original old school big screens). they were on some breakup stuff and he wanted to take the tv. my cuz was like you ain’t taking jack and smashed it with a hammer. dude looked like he wanted to do something but he wasn’t that mad (we had him outnumbered – lol). he took the loss and went on about his business.

YesSheIsCute

November 20th, 2013
2:28 pm

My craziest story? I have quite a few but the one that tops them all didn’t really involve a man per se. I just had the nerve to go crazy on a landlord in Germany while I was on an expired passport. He slammed the door in my face while I was talking so I took the biggest knife and went Michael Myers on his door. He came out screaming about how much his door was going to cost. I told him since he didn’t want to listen to me he could listen to that. This whole exchange happened in German language by the way. :lol: He was livid.

disco

November 20th, 2013
2:29 pm

yes – I was playing games on some realla realla stuff back then. me and this dude and that chick. boy oh boy. she was probably in her 30s but I thought that was super old back then because I was still a teenager. lol. she (and her daughters) used to always pick. one night in the club (yeah I was underage in the club) my aunt was like “is that the chick”. I was like yep. my aunt went up to her smoking a kool filter king and commenced to burning that chick’s face with the cigarette. yep. it popped off up in there that night. this is the same auntie that I mentioned on here said she wanted to be healthy but she wanted to get high too. lol.

Exiled

November 20th, 2013
2:31 pm

Where is Bluz aka ITL?

Seems she has disappeared from the face of the earth!

If they are two separate people then seems thru are a rare breed of fraternal twins.

Walk the same walk.
Makes me think of Luda’s song,’u move I move’ :lol:

U disappear I dissappear ! :lol: