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Office romance: good, bad, and the ugly

Considering the amount of time many of us spend at work, it is not a surprise when romance enters the picture. I believe dating your co-workers is probably one of the riskiest moves a person can make. There is potential for a lot of drama and if things don’t work out, you are left to carry the burden of your bad romance in the office.

I have heard of couples who say that dating someone at work was the only way they were ever going to find anyone. I have also witnessed a really bad break up among co-workers. Worst case scenario has to be the couple who literally got into a physical fight when one dumped the other.

Do you think that dating a co-worker is appropriate? What if the person was your boss?

What are the pros and cons of dating at work? What are some tips would you give on office romance?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

240 comments Add your comment

Leggs

November 19th, 2013
10:55 am

2C ~ honestly, I don’t think “what does she see in him.” My first thought is “he’s a good provider” and that trumps looks. I do give him props for having confidence to approach a beautiful woman. But to be honest, my thought usually goes to him being able to provide on whatever level that woman was needing. Then, I think she likes his personality because you have to like the person. Looks fade, a good soul stays front and center!

Button

November 19th, 2013
10:57 am

Reio – LOL I can always count on a colorful story from you!

we found con doms once, yeahh boy it wasn’t the colorful ones either lol

Reio

November 19th, 2013
10:58 am

“Looks fade, a good soul stays front and center!”

Here here!

Father Time & Mother Nature will remove all good looks, but can do nothing to eliminate a kind heart.

Celisea

November 19th, 2013
10:58 am

LOLOLOLOLOLOL at Big Ole Azz (like what, 50 times in that post)….that was hi larious. Stuff happens. Anytime you put folks together for a number of hours throughout the day, everyday, it’s bound to happen. Gotta be careful. Draw the lines and let folks know what’s up. If not, folks will be hitting on you, on the sly, all day.

I was riding with the good looking white guy one evening coming back from a client visit and he made a sexist remark. I think though it jumped out of his mouth before he realized. Well, it was neither here nor there to me…..cause I already know, “don’t play with me.” Well, when we spent pretty much an entire day with another client about a month ago, meeting and doing lunch, I made the remark (cause they all giggle and fawn over him) about them needing more testosterone in their organization so all that estrogen ain’t unleashed on him (which he burst out laughing btw), he was quick to say we’ve even the score of sexist remarks….and then apologized….again. Mmmmm hmmm, you know you were out of bounds.

CoolShadow

November 19th, 2013
11:03 am

disco – that’s the thing about dating while broke or unemployed; women can have a rotation and still maintain a quality social life while men become social outcasts and undateable. Such are life’s inequities…

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:03 am

I guess the ugly would be a schexual harassment charge if you do want to date someone and they aren’t interested so any pass you make on them you’ll be reported to HR.

Single & Happy

November 19th, 2013
11:05 am

Looks don’t fade! people let themselves go!

Father Time & Mother Nature will remove all good looks, unless something physically happens, beautiful young people will grow up to be beautiful old people.

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:06 am

2C – I know you were talking to Leggs & Disco, but I wanna comment.

It’s not unusual to see pretty women with less than attractive husbands. I personally think females are not as visual as males and are designed somewhat to be attracted to other things beyond looks. And no, I’m not just talking about money either. These dudes sound like average guys in that area. I bet these guys were incredibly kind to their ladies and had more to offer them in terms of character and caring than some pretty boys they may have encountered. These ladies recognized the diamonds these men are under a not-as-pretty package. I say more power to them both.

2CPTG©

November 19th, 2013
11:10 am

Father Time & Mother Nature will remove all good looks

most folks fear dying alone….I can’t lie…..I fear gettin’ ugly! That’s why I couldn’t be like MsAtl and her hubby of 25+ years and then get a divorce…hell naw!

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:11 am

2C – the guy I’m talking about was actually nice looking himself. old sexy chocolate brother. if anything I was impressed because his wife was bodied up. according to him she’s a hardcore gym rat and she’s pushing 50. as far as looks, she was cute enough and stylish enough but that’s not what really drew me in (she was light skinned anyway and i’m color struck – lol). now to really answer the question, more often than not the woman looks nicer than the man in the relationship. not all the time but often. typically if I see a really fine dude and a busted chick I personally think dude has issues that no one else wants to bother with and busted chick just feels good to have a fine man. ijs.

Leggs

November 19th, 2013
11:11 am

Reio ~ I remember you telling us that story last year and I got the same thing out of the story this year I got last, Jan got a big o butt!!!! You must have mentioned it a good 20x (lol).

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:12 am

According to Judge Judy – “Beauty fades, dumb is forever”

Celisea

November 19th, 2013
11:12 am

I personally think females are not as visual as males and are designed somewhat to be attracted to other things beyond looks

I’m so glad someone touched on this. I’d written a post and deleted it. But for me, I’m good cutting up all day on “eye candy”, but that’s just in fun. Nothing wrong with a good looking brother, but what gets to me core is just an all out good dude. And yep, there’s been a time or two I wasn’t feeling a brother intiially, but how can you not be drawn to a really really good dude.

Silky was NOT my type….at least I thought. Not one I’d ever turn twice to look at. He wasn’t bad looking, he just didn’t catch my eye. Well, he kept coming around and coming around and coming around. Saying and doing all the right things…..and flashing dem pearlys (ding!!)….Lawd help meh :)

“A” is leaning towards handsome, but that ain’t it. Honestly, I can do with or without. Like I said, a brother that can say AND DO the right things, words and actions align. Ain’t tryna play games. Good to his core. Melt like butta :mrgreen:

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:14 am

I mentioned a cousin of mine who is a really decent looker. problem is he ain’t got eye water to cry with. he’s the one who married an old cross-eyed pop bottle wearing chick who is overweight to boot. that chick loves him like no one else will ever love him. can’t tell her nothing bout her man.

SlimNu

November 19th, 2013
11:14 am

“Do you think more power to her, or be like……wonder what she see in him?”

2C – I assume he must be BALLING. lol But sometimes folks have just one helluva personality

Reio

November 19th, 2013
11:15 am

“….. unless something physically happens,…….”

Yeah yo azz gets old. That’s physical.

“……. beautiful young people will grow up to be beautiful old people…….”

Never seen a beautiful old person. I know a number of old people, elderly even, with beautiful hearts. But I would never put them in the beautiful category. Old, wrinkled, humped-backed, gray, damn near blind, toothless, DEPENDS wearing, bed-ridden, coughing, snuff dippin, droolin, cane using…folks caint be beautiful physically. Jus sayin.

MsAtl

November 19th, 2013
11:16 am

2C- Are you saying you are afraid of becoming aesthetically challenged as you get older? My looks were the least of my worries. The stress and fear of catching something would have had me looking old before my time…

MsAtl

November 19th, 2013
11:17 am

Reio- Well tell us how you really feel! Wow!

Leggs

November 19th, 2013
11:18 am

Reio ~ I now see others posted on Jan’s big o butt and we each put different amount of times you mentioned it…that was quite funny.

A good hearted person is a good hearated person, no masking that. That makes a person even more prettier/handsome! No wolves in sheep clothing, one’s soul is bare and you can see THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE…that’s beautiful and an aphrodiasic if you like the person (lol).

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:20 am

Disco – There was a couple that lived in my old neighborhood where I grew up. Both were attractive, but the husband was the best looking older man I had ever seen in my life. He was tall, nicely built for 60-70+ and had a head full of thick grey hair. He looked nice in anything, but he could rock a suit like nobody’s business. I’m talking movie star goodlooking, hands down. You could tell his wife was a looker in her day too, but she overdid it on the makeup and hair color a little. They were truly a striking couple. The hubs was a retired pilot and really involved with the Tuskeegee Airmen stuff. They both have passed on. Both the nicest folks you ever wanted to meet too, good people.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:21 am

good personality or not, ugly is still ugly. fat is still fat. out of shape is still out of shape. funky is still funky. broke is still broke. let’s not get it twisted.

Celisea

November 19th, 2013
11:22 am

And alone is still alone :mrgreen:

I’m gone to work when the tide changes….if that’s possible

Celisea

November 19th, 2013
11:23 am

TIL the tide changes….same ol same ol

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:23 am

Reio- you’ve never seen a beautiful old person? I have, I’ve seen a few. shoot you don’t have to be old to have all those ailments you described lol.

Single & Happy

November 19th, 2013
11:23 am

I meet several women last week, I thought they were in their late 20s to early 30s, ended up the youngest was 43, the oldest 52, which looked to be the youngest, and all were gorgeous. It’s all about how you take care of yourself.

I also have several co-workers who are married, and one couple that got a divorce, and she married and divorced another coworker. All seem to be handling it well. Then there are those that are dating also and seem to be handling it well.

2CPTG©

November 19th, 2013
11:25 am

Yes, MsAtl…….

you gotta understand……I was/am a pretty mufvcka!!! RNS, to this day, I get the “something about you…..you have such a distinguished look!” And I hope it doesn’t come off as sounding vain….but hell, that’s what I’ve been told my whole life….

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:25 am

Reio – That’s sad, your 11:15. Beauty comes in all forms and is not limited to the young. And getting older, especially if you are healthy, is a blessing.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:25 am

C – I could go all philosophical and question if any of us is ever really alone but I won’t. I’ll take it the way I think you meant and respond with alone is often (not always but often) a personal choice. ugly – never. fat – I doubt it. broke – who wants to be broke? they might be circumstances but I doubt they are choices.

Single & Happy

November 19th, 2013
11:25 am

Reio, sad sad sad

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:27 am

2C – you’re so vain lol

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:27 am

Button – You are so right, these days those ailments are not limited to the old.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:28 am

as far as I’m concerned, it stands to reason that if there are ugly babies in the world (and there are) then there are likely beautiful seniors in the world. lol.

Leggs

November 19th, 2013
11:29 am

disco ~ what we’re I’m saying is what one may find unattractive another can bypass it because of their income/kind heart, good soul. I always say the same thing, Biggie Smalls is unattractive to me on many levels, but Faith Evans loved that man. Supposedly, there’s someone for everyone and because I don’t walk up to doesn’t mean the next person won’t run to take your hand and take you off the market.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:33 am

leggs – I get it / got it. just making a point about that personality thing. it goes a long way but it don’t go all the way (at least not with me – lol). I understand that it takes all kinds and also subscribe to there being someone for everyone. I suppose the real catch is finding your someone but that’s why eharmony and ‘nem are making all that money. lol.

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:34 am

for the first time in my life I saw an ugly baby. that baby was somehting ugly, it looked reptilcamelish a cross between a lizzard and a camel. and what about the old looking babies? somoe babies look so darn old.

Reio

November 19th, 2013
11:35 am

Yeah yeah yeah….Yall can put me down all you want. Don’t care. Physical beauty is a gift to the young. Mother Nature & Father Time combine to destroy it as we age. That’s the truth. I’ve seen older women that I suspected were “quite the looker” as younger women, but none that I would consider beautiful. So, I guess it is sad for me, cause I ain’t seen it yet.

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:38 am

ppl say denzel washington is handsome, I just can’t see it. He’s just average to me.

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:40 am

geroge clooney, brad pitt, idris elba all of them are just average to me.

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:43 am

Reio- I’m not putting you down, that’s your opinion. Stop being so sensitive.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:45 am

button – denzel doesn’t do anything for me either. Clooney looks like he stinks. I like brad pitt with short hair and clean shaven. he looks nasty with long hair. idris elba? I’d do him and then I’d do him again and the I’d do him one more time for good measure.

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:45 am

Alot of men are attractive to me not necessarily because they are all that gorgeous physically, but they just have a presence about them. The way they put themselves together, the way they carry themselves, their build and stature, their voice.

Reio

November 19th, 2013
11:46 am

Button – Don’t put me down. Ok? Pleeeeeease?

Single & Happy

November 19th, 2013
11:47 am

Reio, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so you have a right to your opinion.

Leggs

November 19th, 2013
11:47 am

For me, those three are little above average (lol).

Button

November 19th, 2013
11:49 am

discoooooo :lol: :lol: :lol:

Kimmie – exactly!

MsAtl

November 19th, 2013
11:50 am

2C- Funny; vain, but funny. I get it. Like Kimmie said, sometimes there’s just something about a person.
Disco- Oh yes- Idris!

kimmie

November 19th, 2013
11:50 am

Idris doesn’t do it for me in the looks department, but he has that swag and when I here the British accent, I like it.

I love Denzel, always have. He’s always been attractive, but not too pretty, nice pecan brown skin and nice teeth and I like his voice. I can’t stand the pretty boy types, not masculine to me.

Like Brad short hair and clean shaven too. He looks like trailer trash with that long stringy hair.

disco

November 19th, 2013
11:56 am

kimmie – I agree on your denzel take. I like him. I think he’s easy on the eyes. he just isn’t sexy to me. if I had the opportunity to get with him, I’d have to pass. I’d be like “come on D, don’t you have 50’s number”?

disco

November 19th, 2013
12:00 pm

I’m continuing my convo with denzel. “okay. cool. I understand 50 ain’t your type. what about ving rhames/michael jai white. you got their numbers? can you hook a sister up? oh. you tripping dee. fine. what about don cheadle? I know you got his number. I can get with that. holler at your boy for me”. lol.

MsAtl

November 19th, 2013
12:19 pm

Disco- You’re picturing that Ving Rhames scene from “Baby Boy” ain’tcha? Lol