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Dating: When cultures collide

I think one of the best parts of dating is when you get to meet someone new who can expose you to new experiences. Whether they hip you to a new language, different foods, or even music, our lives can actually become richer from some of our dating misadventures!

While having things in common can be good, dating someone from a totally different background, culture, or race can be enlightening! One of my friends is dating a guy from India. She is from Atlanta and has never been out of the country. Since she has dated him, she says that outlook on the world has really changed.

Of course, dating someone from a different culture can have its challenges. Sometimes customs, traditions, and values differ so much, it becomes hard to manage a relationship that has to merge all these things.

Have you ever dated someone who is from a different cultural background? Do you think it made things more interesting?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

225 comments Add your comment

Lee

November 15th, 2013
7:12 am

I love meeting people of different interests and cultural backgrounds — then again i am open minded.

Like any other relationship you bring your experiences and they bring theirs, how you mesh that together might depend on how you look at everything , closed minded and only seeing one path you might not have a good relationship with anyone since your believe you and only you can be right.

Happy Friday!!!!

YesSheIsCute

November 15th, 2013
8:34 am

Good morning :)

Yes I’ve dated people from different cultural backgrounds. It does make things more interesting and there are more challenges as well. As an American I find that even dating someone who is also American but part of a different subculture will have it’s challenges and interesting nuances.

SlimNu

November 15th, 2013
8:53 am

I love meeting people of different interests and cultural backgrounds — then again i am open minded

Lee – I’m right there with you.

My exes family was from the island (Trinidad & Tobago) and i really embraced their culture, especially the food. I must say at first, it was hard to understand them but if you’re around long enough, you start to pickup on things. I feel like his family appreciated that I was open to learning about them….doesn’t mean me and his mom didn’t get into it though. lol

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
9:11 am

I too love meeting people from all walks of life. I’ve dated this guy from Nigeria but he was entirely too controlling and deodorant wasn’t his friend. Nonetheless, given the opportunity, I would embrace dating outside my culture. Always good to learn new things and learn about other peoples’ walk in life.

Good morning.

Can’t contain myself SCANDAL WAS ON FIRE LAST NIGHT!!!!

Button

November 15th, 2013
9:30 am

Dating someone from a different culture is very exciting esp when that person is enthused in teaching you about it. . Everything from art to cuisine and the way of life is so facinating again only if the person telling you is enthused about his/her culture. The only problem I’ve had in dating a guy from a different culture is sports. Most of the guys are from spanish background and their favorite passtime is soccer and I’m not a soccer fan.

Good morning!

MsAtl

November 15th, 2013
9:30 am

Morning All!

I have never dated someone from a different cultural background. I imagine that once you get used to it, it can actually be rather interesting and fun. I am open to it.
Leggs- You know I am laughing at you (your Nigerian experience), don’t you?

YesSheIsCute

November 15th, 2013
9:36 am

@Leggs did he expect you to pursue him? What happened? I am interested in this so called “Nigerian experience” :lol:

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
9:39 am

“…esp when that person is enthused in teaching you about it.” – That’s the key because if they’re not and you keep asking about this, about that, and they become frustrated, slow demise.

MsAtl ~ the first time that scent hit my nostrils I chalked it up to him just getting off work and perhaps it wore off. The next time I was like “WTH?” I asked if he would like to use my deodorant before we went out and he said he doesn’t like to use it. Huh, how do you walk around like that all day. Do you not smell yourself. Your armpits have their own racing flag alerting people to run for cover. I remember laying on the couch in his arms watching a movie thinking to myself “I can’t do this, I just can’t.” Every time I hear “I’ll do Anything For You, by Denroy Morgan” I think of him. We got down on the dance off that song one evening.

MsAtl

November 15th, 2013
9:42 am

“I can’t do this, I just can’t.” – cracking up!

YesSheIsCute

November 15th, 2013
9:48 am

LOL@ I can’t do this, I just can’t. Hilarity!

So which do you think is worse B.O. when the person don’t want to use hygiene products (deo, fds, etc) or bad breath and person doesn’t want to use gum or mints?

Celisea

November 15th, 2013
9:57 am

I’m all about learning about other cultures. I’m that coworker or neighbor that’s gonna ask you 10 rounds of questions….what’s this, how did y’all celebrate that, same something for me in your native language, what happens in your country around this (that or the other), how long have you been in the states, why did you leave, do you miss home, do you have relatives there…..so forth and so on. lolololol I’m that person that can sightsee and take pics, talk to the natives and spend every vacation (if I could), in another country.

Now, for all of that, I’m not really big on dating outside my race or other cultures. Just my preference…..especially Africans.

O/T: On BO: My fomer coworker always kept a small container of FDS in her purse. She was super clean…lol She’d give herself a hit before getting on the train (heading home). Now, I always though if you gotta use FDS then you might need an appointment…lololol Masking odors ain’t a cure. Deoderant, yes, a feminine spray ummm, not so much. Not saying she had an ordor, cause I never detected anything, but in general, folks itching or needing to cover an odor needs to see they gyn. Leave them (yes them) sprays alone and getcha yaself seen about…lolololol

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
9:58 am

YSIC ~ don’t think he expected me to pursue him. He was very dictatorial in that when I was looking for a new apartment he demanded that I live close to him if not in the same subdivision. When I wouldn’t agree to that, he offered to pay my rent for a year. I didn’t agree to that either, although as a struggling student it did sound good. I knew, even at the tender age of 20, I couldn’t be indebted to someone just to make my college years more bearable. From there things just went down hill. We were together for only 3 weeks. So, I don’t really consider having truly dated someone outside of my culture. Three weeks of stench can last a lifetime.

Celisea

November 15th, 2013
10:01 am

Same thing with mints or gum. Don’t get me wrong, I keep a pack in the car….wanna have that stay fresh feeling. Sometimes you can’t get back by the house to bush midday…lolol But, I don’t feel like I can’t talk or ever be without….cause I don’t have the funky breath. :) Now if you’re doing that to cover up you bad breath, see the dentist or the doctor. It’s either in your mouth or likely your belly.

Okay, I’m done…and laughing while I type this.

Celisea

November 15th, 2013
10:05 am

Oh, one more….the extreme is folks brushing their teeth throughout the day…here at work….IMO I’m holding my breath and keeping my mouth closed in the restroom, tryna get in a out of that sea of germs, but you got your mouth wide open brushing and cleaning, while swallowing the germs from that funk!! I’m just kidding…sort of. That same FDS coworker made sure she brushed a couple of times at work. I ain’t doing that!! This other chick is in there everyday doing the same. I mean, I brush and floss and usually get a good report when I go for my cleanings. For me that suffices.

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:07 am

Leggs – Lol…laying on the couch in his arms…you actually did this!??? LOL nothing like b.o. to kill the mood! most indians are like that too. the stench in the elevators, I likened to faint everytime they are on it with me.

Yes – b.o. vs stank mouf? well with a stank mouf you only smell it when they talk, if it’s really stank it comes thru the nose….sometimes even mint can’t cover it up!

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:09 am

I think I’m going to go with bad breath. I work with a woman who’s breath smells like she eats dirty socks for breakfast every morning. I just don’t get it. No, I’ve never told her, but I’ve come close to saying something. Even as outspoken as I am, I didn’t speak up. I have left mints and toothpast and mouthwash on her desk. Don’t think she knows it is I who have left her such great party favors.

disco

November 15th, 2013
10:11 am

good morning. I guess the general consensus is that we are all open to different cultures. kudos to the blog. I know I’ll certainly date another race. shoot, right about now I’m getting fed up with American men. lol.

C- I’m all for a closed mouth don’t get fed and you don’t ask you don’t get but dang girl. that’s way too many questions right out the gate. lol. maybe it’s me. maybe it’s just too early. lol.

button – I’m not a soccer fan either but I’ll tell you that when there are two Spanish countries playing in the “whatever the big soccer game is”, it ain’t nothing but a party y’all. I don’t care for soccer but I do love a good time.

Celisea

November 15th, 2013
10:13 am

disco – Well, that’s just me and how I do it. :) I’m always always always inquistive about places around the world and the people that live there….inquiring minds want to know

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:15 am

“if it’s really stank it comes thru the nose” – that’s my line of thinking. They don’t always have to talk for you to smell it.

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:15 am

Morning All!!

Oh yes, coming off that Scandal high!!!! Off The Chain!!!! All I gotta say is with what Millie had to deal with, she can have anything she wants as far as I’m concerned!!

Topic – I’m with Cel on this. Love to learn about different cultures, meet people, travel, eat different foods, what have you. I’m very open-minded where that is concerned. I am open to doing all that – with my Black American Christian husband.

I absolutely could not deal with the cultural differences, expectations and treatment of women (and children) that entail many other ethnicities and religions.

What’s going on this weekend, gang?

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:16 am

disco ~ if you didn’t watch Scandal last night, let me tell you it’s really no longer about Liv and her weak libido. It was juicy, as a friend said, EPIC last night. So many twists and turns. So much to sink your teeth into.

Celisea

November 15th, 2013
10:16 am

with my Black American Christian husband.

:) :mrgreen:

MsAtl

November 15th, 2013
10:19 am

Kimmie- Tomorrow is Ladies Nite Out; a group of us are going to see Best Man Holiday. We get together once a month for activities.

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:19 am

Leggs! – oh no you didn’t LOL you left tooth paste and mouth wash on her desk? wow! what was her reaction? did she go around looking a certian kind of way after that? Some ppl have coffee breath, cigarette breath esp if they eat eggs and garlice or onions. That I can understand but that ol funky funk is too much.

Reio

November 15th, 2013
10:20 am

Morning all!

“What’s going on this weekend, gang?”

Them stankin DAWGS gonna come over to Alabama and get whooped by Auburn. That’s what!!

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:20 am

disco ~ I was looking at my lipstick. I mix two shades together. Plum Brown (which is really a red) and Smokey Brown (which is a dark brown). I use the Smokey Brown to tone down the redness of the Plum Brown. It’s #701 (Smokey Brown) in most beauty supply stores.

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:22 am

Reio, go sit down somewhere. As long as we beat Florida(which we did, barely but a win is a win) and we sit the North Avenue Trade School down, I don’t care about the rest!LOL!!!

YesSheIsCute

November 15th, 2013
10:23 am

@MsAtl Enjoy! :) Also, let us know how the movie was!

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:23 am

disco – that’s nothing like a soccer party. hmpf they will party like it’s 1999, if their team win that is, it they lose, watch out and stay in doors. I ain’t playing those folks are somehing serious about soccer.

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:23 am

Button ~ I heard she asked those in her area if they saw anyone by her desk. One of the two that saw me that day told me. They shook my hand as I left so I’m pretty sure they didn’t rat me out. If they did and she had come to me, I would have used that opportunity to speak up. She didn’t come to me.

Mrs. SexyCool

November 15th, 2013
10:26 am

I guess you could consider my brief relationships with the occasional White guy and the African who considered elephant a delicacy dating outside of my “culture” – Been there. Done that. Moved on.

And in SexyCoolNews – yesterday, I bit the bullet and bought a Mac. On FB, I called it a Life Event. (lol)

Now…gotta go walk the dog.

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:28 am

this w/e? I’m staying in. too darn cold for me to be out mixing and mingling. I’ll cook something simple but delicious to nibble on while we watch a horror movie.

disco

November 15th, 2013
10:29 am

leggs – last night I tried to catch up on scandal. got all comfortable, pulled out the laptop. watched about 10 minutes of an episode, wasn’t feeling it. watched about 10 minutes of another episode, wasn’t feeling. finally said “later for scandal”. I’m just not there this season.

disco

November 15th, 2013
10:30 am

kimmie – since leggs reminded me of lipstick, I looked up the mac you mentioned yesterday. it was more red and I’m looking for more brown. dark brown. dark dark brown. almost black brown. lol.

disco

November 15th, 2013
10:33 am

my weekend will be best man after work, an old school music playing incense burning house cleaning tonight, running and grocery shopping in the morning and then whatever happens.

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:34 am

MsAtl – I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to go see it – I could do a date night thing with hubs, cause I’ve heard it’s not just a chick flick. Grab a meal and hang out a little, he would go along though I know he would rather see Thor. I’m sicka that superhero shid though!LOL!

Or, hook up with my girls and do our Girls day out thing.

Either way, definitely gonna see it! Morris is my man!

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:34 am

I use black brown on my eyebrows (lol).

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:35 am

Leggs – well did she use it? or is it still stank? so many quesitons ~ sigh~

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:36 am

Disco – It does look redder online, but even in person it’s probably not what you want. Check out Iman’s line though, or the stuff Leggs mentioned.

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:39 am

Disco – Come to think of it, Urban Decay can be a little cutting edge and might have something interesting too. Check them out. I love their eyeshadows and their eye primer is fantastic. Whenever I would wear eyeshadow in a few hours it would fade because I have oily skin. I started using that primer, and my eyeshadow lasts until I take it off at night!

MsAtl

November 15th, 2013
10:40 am

Kimmie- Tell me about it! There is man meat eye candy in this movie!!! Anyone know where I can get a cute ladylike looking bib?

Miss Moni

November 15th, 2013
10:41 am

Good Friday Morning MIA!!! *It’s the WEEKEND baby!* :-D

I went out on 1 date with someone from a different culture, at age 18. The next day he concluded that he preferred to date from his other half. Go figure. . . At first I felt like he was being racist, then I realized that he was just being honest.

Button

November 15th, 2013
10:42 am

I don’t like wearing red lipstick, growing up I was told that red lipstick are for loose women, harlots lol oh and red nail polish too…heck anything red for that matter. I rock my read minin skirt and red blazer but not around my older kin folks

Miss Moni

November 15th, 2013
10:46 am

-Button I grew up hearing that as well. Oh well, LOL!!! I do rock a nice reddish lipstick from MAC called: Rebel! I absolutely LOVE it.

I think women who choose to wear red makeup just have to find the RIGHT shade of red for them.

YesSheIsCute

November 15th, 2013
10:47 am

@miss moni he preferred to date from his other half so did he have a girlfriend? I’m confused about that statement.

kimmie

November 15th, 2013
10:47 am

Button – One of my good friends mom is Cuban. She said her mom used to tell her & her sister the same thing growing up about red lipstick & nail polish. Once she grew up and moved out, she & her sister wear it when they want though. They grew up in Miami and my friend loves wearing bright colors and she said she can’t see excluding red just cause of her mom’s outdated views!LOL!!

Leggs

November 15th, 2013
10:48 am

Button ~ I’d like to think she used it. Somedays I see and speak with her and all things are freshy fresh. Other days I give her a little more personal space when speaking with her.

Miss Moni

November 15th, 2013
10:49 am

-Kimmie/MsAtl I’ll check out the Best Man Holiday next week, when the crowd dies down. As much as I want to go opening weekend, I don’t like overly crowded theaters and folks talking during and to the screen. I want to enjoy it in peace so I can actually hear what’s going on, LOL!!!

Miss Moni

November 15th, 2013
10:49 am

-YesHeIsCute He was half black and half asian. So he preferred to date asian girls.

SlimNu

November 15th, 2013
10:50 am

kimmie – This weekend i’m going to pickup my sis and niece in Auburn to head to Birmingham for my cousins baby shower. It’s weird that I’ll be celebrating life and Mr. Man is off to go to a funeral to celebrate death.