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Dating: Dealing with the bait and switch?

Many of my guy friends complain that women have a bad habit of changing things up once they get comfortable. Some “changes” are easier to tolerate than others but in those extreme cases, things can get dicey.

Take for instance, drinking or sex. How do you feel about dating someone who did/did not drink or have sex when you started dating but stopped/started after you were a couple?

I have two friends dealing with this bait and switch dilemma. Liz says she met her guy at church and he supposedly did not smoke or drink. After they got serious, he “suddenly” has a cigar hobby and drinks when he watches the game. Is she wrong to dump him if she believes he did the bait and switch?

My friend Keith told me that he really decided to date his girlfriend exclusively after he realized their sexual chemistry was “out of this world” great. She recently told him that she wants to abstain because of her spiritual journey and he is having a hard time dealing with this kind of change. Is he wrong to dump her now that the thing that made him like her so much is missing?

How common is this bait and switch problem in dating? Has it happened to you before? How did you handle it?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

222 comments Add your comment

Single and Happy

October 9th, 2013
7:20 am

Hello all

Sometimes it’s people being who they think the other person want’s them to be “bait and switch”! And other times people just change over time. How long before this change happens determines what it may have been. But if you don’t like the person that they have become then maybe you should move on, there’s no rule that say you have to stay with someone.

Lee

October 9th, 2013
7:21 am

How common is this bait and switch problem in dating? I think it is a major problem, people act all the time–excuse me i was going out with this type of person, just who are you now?!

Has it happened to you before? How did you handle it? Yes it has happened to me, i got divorced that is how i handled it. No one has time for lies and games.

Keith problem is he only focused on the sex part there is more to life than that, if they were married and she had a “women issue” what would he do then?… Since it was just the sex he needs to dump her, and let her find someone that likes all of her

If i was Liz i would be asking so when did you start this smoking and drinking? depending on what he said is what i would do, how long did they date for ? I mean if its been a year and he never once smoked or drank around her i would be wondering why the change now, it is cause you feel you have me now that you can be who you really are, if so then buddy i am gone, like the wind … actors are not wanted go to hollywood and try your acting out there.

HAGD

Hazel

October 9th, 2013
8:11 am

You are suppose to get more comfortable as you go on in your relationship. But drastic changes are def going to effect the relationship as you didn’t reveal that to your partner. It depends on how serious the new change is. Drinking/smoking ..ehh, not that big of a deal (in my book). Physical, however is something big, if you started off with being physical and then just stopped. If he likes her enough to stick around then good for her. If he leaves, can’t blame him.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
8:16 am

Its not necessarily bait and switch but just that folks grow and change!

As for the sex part,so if she didn’t lick back then but he liked it still and he gave her a starter role but now that they’re an item and he discovered that she could crawl(lick it) and purr to add excitement,that should be considered a bait and switch?

Da hell? (to quote 2C) :lol:

Folks live and learn and change!

No bait and switch.

Either you stay or u go.

Your choice.

..good merning MIA!

SlimNu

October 9th, 2013
8:32 am

I’ve been with a dude that, after some time really slowed down on the bedroom action….and it definitely was hard to deal with. Usually, it’s women that come up with some spiritual guilt or some other reasons why they no longer want to get it in. Very rare to hear it from a guy.

Drinking wouldn’t be a big deal to me unless they were a closet alcoholic…but if a dude lied about smoking, I would have a hard time with that.

Button

October 9th, 2013
8:51 am

People change daily, what are you going to do, dump a date everytime they change? The guy that is all of a sudden smoking and drinking was already smoking and drinking just not around LIz. He didn’t change, he LIED! The girl who wants to explore her new found religion has a right to do whatever it is she wants to with HER body. She changed her mind about having schex outside of marriage. If Keith is not on board then he should move on if he’s not willing to put schex aside and date her.

we grow, we explore,we change/ our mind!

Good morning!

Reio

October 9th, 2013
8:54 am

Morning all!

Some of you guys/gals on here wonder why I was so quick to dump women back during my dating years. Well, here’s one reason, among others, why.

If they change into something, not to your liking, Dump’em. Simple. Sorry. Don’t look back. Just the way it is.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
8:56 am

Buddy didn’t just up and start smoking cigars and drinking. He did what he had to do to get it. Such a cheap cheesy move.

The woman in Diva’s post is on a spiritual journey. She owes no one an explanation for that. Her walk is with God, not him. People change and usually for the better. I don’t see how smoking and drinking is a change for the better.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
9:06 am

I know it’s early on this topic today, but for some reason, I get the feeling that this will get over analyzed. When it’s actually quite simple. If the change is something that bothers you, give them the boot.
It always amazes me how some people will stick around and try to talk things out, or even, try and change the other person back into what you thought they were. I never had time for this. No patience for such foolishness. You have to first be true to yourself, hold your head up, be proud, and demand respect. Everyone should have a list of things they will not put up with. Lying, deceiving, deception, and cowardice should be right at the top of this list. IMO.

Button

October 9th, 2013
9:07 am

My ex always accused me of changing. He said I went from being a fun party girl to a prude. I changed for the better, no more partying like a rock star instead staying home more often and going to Bible study.

Button

October 9th, 2013
9:11 am

Reio – Even if you’ve been with them for months/years?

I expect change for the better, If a person starts to work out and eat healthier that’s a good change. If a person is on a religious path I’ll respect that person. Who am I to tell a person no you can’t change? IF anything it will inspire me to take an inventory of my life and do some changes for the better.

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
9:19 am

Morning everyone!

I’m sure bait and switch happens quite often. I feel it happened with The Ex…it just took some time for the switch to happen! I will always be myself from the beginning…you either like me for me or you don’t. No worries!

The smoking and drinking dude…it all depends. I don’t think it’s that big of a deal unless he is an alcoholic and/or gets nasty when he drinks during the game. Most people with a cigar habit don’t tend to smoke that often. I wouldn’t make it a dealbreaker.

Now…the girl who claims she is on a spiritual journey now…I don’t understand how you can steadily have sex with someone and then cut it off because of “religion.” I question if she’s being honest. If they haven’t been together that long…he should move on. If she doesn’t give it to him, chances are he will find someone who will. It’s better to move on now than to cheat on her later…

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
9:21 am

Morning All!

As has been said, people change over time. I would not have a problem with someone who, say tasted a margarita and decided they liked it and wanted to drink more. I would have a problem with you deciding you liked it and becoming a raging alcoholic.
The bottom line is that you have to know what you cannot accept. If the change is too big or you can’t accept it, then you owe it to both of you to move on.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
9:25 am

First off, it’s not fair to stop having sex w/someone because you are now on a spiritual journey. What you need to do is end that relationship because it’s not fair to the man.

If you supposedly didn’t smoke or drink when we got together and now you do, yes, I’m ending the relationship because you came out the gate lying. Not only that, cigars stink.

However, I do drink and being in a relationship w/someone who doesn’t may prove troublesome because one drink may be too many for him, let alone three because I’m not a one drink kinda gal (lol).

Good good morning! HUUUUMMMMPPPP DAAAYYYY!!!!

Reio

October 9th, 2013
9:28 am

“Reio – Even if you’ve been with them for months/years?”

Yes. For one reason only. It only gets worse over time.

Met a young lady. We hit it off. Early, she told me that she was basically a homebody. Didn’t go out much. Didn’t like big crowds. Enjoyed dinner out, maybe a movie, show….from time to time, but not very often. Hell, sounds god to me. I’m kinda that way myself. Small social gatherings with friends/family, anniversaries, birthdays,…black tie events, ceremonies..every now and then. Great. Over time, she started wanting to go out more. “Tired of just you and me.”, “We need to get out more.”, “What about all them parties we been missin?…….” She got the boot after almost two years together. Got tired of this. She changed, or, she just reverted back to what she really was. I didn’t mention it to her, but I used to wonder, early in the relationship, how she seemed to know the names and location of all the hot clubs and nightspots around town. Never expressed a desire to go to any of these places until later, but she sure seemed to have a certain fondness for them. This was a change I didn’t want to deal with. I could have, of course, but chose not to. She got the boot. Never looked back.

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
9:31 am

Reio- And I think that is more what it is (in those extreme examples), people revert back to what they were in the first place, rather than changing per se. They tried to be different to please you and fall short.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
9:36 am

@Reio..i bet she was cheating u all this time(2 years) and u didnt know bout it…….

she was the chic that smashed other dudes she partied with and they proly knew u and they wld brag and say,”her dude is so soo slow,stays at home..while she parties with us!” :lol:

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
9:39 am

MMeello – Imma start calling you and your “kinfolks” the blog creepy crawler. You only come out when it’s time to belittle or take it to the nasty. You know, tatas and coochie convo….

SMDernH

You are never NOT what you are. Everyone is born a sinner, including you that don’t understand the inner working of sin. If you are converting or a convert, your sins (as with the rest of the world) are still there. When you are a convert, a believer, your sins are held in remission. They are not done away with until you cross over and make it to heaven. If you move away from your conversion and you stop walking, talking and being fed from the word, those same sins will come back up.

Reio – Maybe you was her distraction and she fell into “backsliding”

Button

October 9th, 2013
9:40 am

Reio – her key words were “Didn’t go out much.” now if she had said didn’t go out at all then she changed, looks like she just slowed down on going out. jmo.
“Didn’t like big crowds.” but small gathers will do.—-she was talking in riddles.

Button

October 9th, 2013
9:40 am

meant small gatherings will do.

Button

October 9th, 2013
9:44 am

Celisea – where in the Bible do you find that??

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
9:47 am

Good morning everyone! Hope the week has been good to you all thus far! :)

Like Reio said it is very simple and we overanalyze it. A bait and switch is really just a lie. So already you’ve proven yourself untrustworthy with. The little rope I gave you to hang yourself, you actually went and hung yourself! At that point there is nothing left to talk about.

Many moons ago, I might have tried to work it out, make excuses such as the stress of school, work, or family is causing the behavior and wait for the “stress” to be over. But truth be told, the way a person feels entitled to act during “stressful situations” says a lot about their character.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
9:49 am

You only come out when it’s time to belittle

Celisea…I do not “only” come out to……I am up and about ALL the dern time..ur eyes are selective?

SlimNu

October 9th, 2013
9:50 am

Reio – What was wrong with going out a LITTLE bit more than you had been? I’m can’t say for sure but did she bug you about wanting to go out every weekend or something to want to end it just like that?

I used to go out quite often but I just do not have that desire anymore. There is nothing wrong with every now and then but i guess my mind frame just isn’t with all the clubbing, lounging, night spots etc I rather meet up with some friends for dinner, drinks, bowling, paint balling, zip lining, go-cart racing or something like that.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
9:59 am

Button, here you go….

Luke 24:47.
And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.

Acts 2:38
Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

Romans 3: 25
Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God

Acts 10:43
To him give all the prophets witness, that through his name whosoever believeth in him shall receive remission of sins.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
10:03 am

“What are we gonna do this weekend?”, “What do you mean?”, “Where we goin this weekend?”, “I don’t know, haven’t thought about it.”, “You haven’t?”, “No…. Maybe we could go to the zoo Saturday, we haven’t been there in a while. I heard about a new baby Giraffe that was born about a month ago.”, “A what!?”, “A baby Giraffe.”, “A baby Giraffe?, Hell, we can see that anytime. What about ‘Slazies’?”, “What ABOUT ‘Spazies’?, “I want to go there.”, “We were just there a few weeks ago.”, “I know, I liked it.”, Yeah, but seems like you want to party a lot lately.”, “Well, what’s wrong with that?”, “Nothing, actually. But you wasn’t like this when we met.”, “You just stuck up. Ain’t nothing wrong with going out sometimes.”, “I agree, but every weekend you want to go to a club or party somewhere.”, “It ain’t every weekend, just more than we been going….”. On and on about it. So, I had to cut her loose. Glad I did. She wanted to talk about it….Started backtracking once she saw how bothered I was. “Well, I’m not really like that. I just want to be seen with you in public. You know?” Trying to butter me up. But to no avail. I pushed her over the cliff.

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:04 am

Celisea – none of those scriptures ties into what you said @ 9:39. by doing a word search on remission of sins.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:05 am

Button – I’m not going to go into a long drawn out lesson :) I don’t think it would be fair to this forum.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:07 am

And yes, they do. It can’t get much simpler than those verses. You repent/convert and believe in exchange for Christ retaining/holding/keeping your sins in remission…thus “repent for the remission of your sins”

disco

October 9th, 2013
10:09 am

good morning.

the topic on doug banks radio show the other day was who tries to change who more, men or women. some interesting stories of failed and successful change attempts

bluz – I’m with you re old girl’s spiritual journey. it could be legit but religious game is just as real as all other forms of game.

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
10:12 am

Morning Gang!

Sometimes it’s bait & switch, sometimes it’s lying, sometimes it’s change. Depends on the situation. The dude drinking & smoking is probably a bait & switch since he met Liz at church. He thought she would not accept him. A mistake, but Liz has to decide if it’s a dealbreaker for her.

The Keith situation is tough. I want to believe that their relationship is more than physical even tho their sexual chemistry is off the chain. I don’t see that being the absolute only reason they are exclusive. Physical chemistry and affection are important, let’s be real. It would be tough to remove it once it becomes part of the relationship. Now you’ve taken away a big piece of the puzzle. I don’t see this as a bait & switch. She is trying to reconcile her growing spiritual side with her inner freaky side. One of my good friends struggles with this. She has not given up the freak, but for a long time there, every time she was intimate with her boyfriend she would feel guilty. I got sick of hearing about it. Told her she just needs to find a way to deal with it and decide what’s most important to her. Obstain & break up with boyfriend, yall go on and get married so you can let your freak flag fly or continue as you are and stop whining to me!

disco

October 9th, 2013
10:13 am

atl – what if you are an alcoholic, just not raging? lol.

leggs – I’m with you. so not a one drink kind of girl. lol.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
10:13 am

Celisea and Button..uall need to come to my church….we dont tithe! :lol:

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:13 am

Speaking of “gaming”, I’ve seen snippets of The New Atlanta (or whatever it’s called) advertised during commercials and watched a snippet of the actual show last night. Vawn is such a playa. He held a men gathering because he wanted feedback for some book he’s writing. He said as long as he’s honest and upfront in telling women that he’s not exclusive he can sleep with hundreds a day if he want and he’s not wrong. I thought about the blog when I heard that.

Of course Tibble, the white dude that’s digging the girl Vawn is gaming stood toe to toe with him (kudos) and told him how foul and jacked up that was.

That was my first time seeing that show.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:14 am

MMeello – Nuh uh, I like my church…lol

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:17 am

A few years back we had nothing but well positioned fine brothers up in here and one nice looking wholesome dude in the bunch. He was saved as well as his fiance. They dated six months and got married. My guess is they couldn’t continue to hold out…so they married. Last I heard (cause I saw him earlier this year) is that things were great, they had two kids. I know what he does for a living so he’s making mad money.

Sometimes change is good. He wasn’t always saved.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
10:18 am

But to no avail. I pushed her over the cliff.

:lol: :lol:

I like that Reio! :lol:

push her over the cliff…dang!

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:22 am

they “have” two kids

disco

October 9th, 2013
10:22 am

ex / reio – pushing someone over a cliff does sound like a good fantasy. still, y’all are menfolk. y’all have muscles. y’all can actually lift someone up, swing them around and then toss them over the cliff. wouldn’t that be more satisfying than just pushing them? ijs.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
10:30 am

Disco….Reio writes good stories/fantasy…..i am glad they’re not literal because he seemed really brutal but forthright and decisive in his decision making…he did not look back…

some of uall ladies could learn from his decison making because uall have let dudes get the full galons of milk at zero or half price then watched as the dudes ditched the ur cows fro another fresh one …for too too long. :lol:

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:31 am

Celisea – Not trying “start” anything just wanted to know where did get what you said at 9:39 from. Hope you know it’s talking about past sins.

Melo -No thanks! I’m good :lol:

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:33 am

Reio – did you ever stop to think that you were boring? that could’ve been why she all of a sudden wanted to go out to not be alone with you. you know some outside excitment. ijs

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
10:34 am

Disco- Raging or not, no alcoholics, lol.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
10:36 am

“What about all them women lookin at you?”, “What women lookin at me?”, “All them women at ‘Spazies’”, “What women at ‘Spazies’?”, “All them women that were checking you out.”, “I didn’t notice any women checkin me out at ‘Spazies’.”, “You lying, you kaint tell me you didn’t see all them women looking at you. I was looking at them, while they were looking at you”, “I can, and I am, telling you I didn’t notice.”, “Well they was. And if I hadn’t been there, they would’ve done more than just look. That’s why you need to go out more.”, “Now, wait a minute. You mean, if I went out, by myself, I’d have women approaching me?”, “Yeah.”, “Well, why would I do that? I got you.”, “Um jus sayin, you need to get out more and be around other people.”, “Honey, you’re makin no sense. I don’t understand….” I was dizzy trying to figure her out. Much too much confusion. Just changed over time. Became weary and ended it.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:36 am

Button – If you believe today, everything…yesterday and back is past.

I’m done :)

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:37 am

Reio – What’s up with the play by play skits???

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
10:40 am

Celisea ~ a friend was over and wanted to watch The New Atlanta. Everyone is crazy on that show. The light skinned girl with the black roots and golden hair is trying to become a “standout” so she can get a spinoff like NeNe…ain’t happening. Vawn definitely has game and Tribble (white dude) stood toe to toe with him. Afrika is the girl Vawn is seeing and she says mixing business with pleasure has never worked for her. Well, honey, it’s not going to work this time either.

As a matter of fact, my EOD is taken from that gathering of men.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
10:41 am

Button – Could be. Can’t deny that. But here’s how I see it. If I’m boring enough to try and change me, why not move on to someone that’s not boring. Or, cut me loose, and wait for a non boring person to come along. I was boring when we met. And she knew it.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:44 am

Leggs – I was so amazed at his game and he ain’t all that. Not knocking him but if you’re gamming like that, you better have it going on. Like her friend asked, “have y’all even gone out yet?” She’s walking around smitten and junk and he, RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER YES flirted with the young crazy chick. They at his APARTMENT! Not palatial mansion, not house in the burbs, but his apartment!!

I definitely like Tribble. I like the fact that he can see through all the BS and called it. I like the fact that he was geniunely interested in Afika. She just brushed him off cause Vawn gave her a few chocolate covered strawberries and a salad…on the coffee table!!! I have a feeling she’s gonna circle back and see what Tribble has to offer.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
10:44 am

“Reio – What’s up with the play by play skits???”

Ain’t skits. Don’t know how to construct skits. Just actual conversations, as best I can recall, in contributing to the dialog and topic this morning. Thank you.

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
10:45 am

Exiled – Your 10:30 – It took me a minute to come to that understanding, the part about not letting things drag on with a dude when it’s clear it’s just not working out. Once I did though, things got much better for me. Quit wasting my time and precious good years. And bump that “well as long as you learned from it, your time wasn’t wasted.” If it’s not working, keep it moving. It’s not gonna get better over time. It’s just not meant to be.

The only person I would try to “work it out” with is a SPOUSE.

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:45 am

Celisea – yeah if you were baptized today! plus you have to do more than just believe, even Satan and his minons believe!

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:45 am

Reio – My apologies…wasn’t trying to be offensive. You just break out with a play by play. Carry on.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:45 am

Button – Okay :)

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:48 am

Reio – I don’t know if you’re boring or the life of the party or even somewhere in the middle, I’m just adding to the convo. but it appears that you fault the ladies for the demise of your relationship a bit too much.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
10:53 am

you fault the ladies for the demise of your relationship a bit too much.

@Button..if u pulled the trigger because u didnt like something he did,wldnt u fault him for not living up to ur standard?

and Reio has admitted that he benched ladies A Lot!

didnt give them second chance…..so his bating average sounds true to his words.

plus he is the narrator and Main actor….im sure the ladies(exes) wld fault him if they were telling the story on this blog.

disco

October 9th, 2013
10:54 am

anyone have an actual bait and switch tail? something like old girl/boy fixed a bomb azz meal only to find out her sister/his momma cooked and they passed it off as their own. lol.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:54 am

im sure the ladies(exes) wld fault him if they were telling the story on this blog

Or have a different version

Button

October 9th, 2013
10:56 am

Celisea – Or have a different version—EXACTLY!!!!!!

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:58 am

Button – :) I didn’t wanna say it, you made me segue into it…lol

Just funning, Reio :)

I’m gone to lurk and work. Got an appointment today.

disco

October 9th, 2013
10:58 am

I just saw my tail instead of tale. I bet that really would make an interesting bait and switch story. lol. anyone accidentally/on purpose sleep with the wrong twin or a relatively that closely resembled?

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
10:59 am

Well, MMello made me segue into it, but I was thinking or wondering (I should say) the same as your 10:48….

Button

October 9th, 2013
11:00 am

Reio

October 9th, 2013
11:00 am

“….but it appears that you fault the ladies for the demise of your relationship a bit too much.”

As I’ve said before on this blog; I’ve never been dumped. Never asked a woman out, that said anything other than “Yes’. So, as a result of this fact, it would stand to reason, that every relationship that has ended, ended because, I ended it. Not bragging, or boasting, or anything like that. The truth is, I’m a regular fella. A bit better educated than most, a higher income than most. So what? Big deal. Doesn’t make me a better man or better person. Just the way it is. I wish my wife had been my first girlfriend. That way I would not have gone through what I went through to find her. But, she wasn’t. I obviously, eventually, found her. She tells people that she was lucky. Perhaps, perhaps not. I know one thing; I’m the lucky one. No doubt. No doubt.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:00 am

Or have a different version—EXACTLY

Exactly!

three-signed!

Button

October 9th, 2013
11:01 am

Celisea – either way it’s still :lol:

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:02 am

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
11:02 am

Disco- I don’t know if it’s a bait & switch, but all of his photos of his apartments were spotless… then I found out it was because he hired a maid and didn’t like to clean.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:02 am

I’ve never been KNOWINGLY dumped.

as u well know ladies,there is always somebody with a better tongue! :lol: :lol:

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:02 am

I’ve never been KNOWINGLY dumped.

as u well know ladies,there is always somebody with a better tongue! :lol: :lol:

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:04 am

Reio ~ your 10:36 made me dizzy!

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:06 am

Leggs..u need an iron shot?

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:07 am

your 10:36 made me dizzy!

I just hollered….LOLOLOL I’m tryna work and lurk

Miss Moni

October 9th, 2013
11:10 am

GOOD Wednesday Morning MIA!!! :-)

The bait and switch huh. . . I always think of a bank robbery when I hear this term.

Oh well, as Single and Happy stated earlier, no one is making you stay with a person. If you feel like you’re not getting what you should OR you got hoodwinked, then keep it moving. The choice is YOURS!!!

Button

October 9th, 2013
11:10 am

Reio – if you make more than minimun wage then you make a higher income than most. I still find you stories interesting even if you are not the villian.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:11 am

“They at his APARTMENT! Not palatial mansion, not house in the burbs, but his apartment!!” – I was surprised too, but perhaps he’s subleasing while in town (rofl). And, from the looks of it, she gave it up on their first date! When she said she was a hair model, I thought the hair was hers until she went into the wig shop (lol).

Did you see her group’s perfomance? I give Vawn props in telling her she should have given him the rose and not the girl. Don’t temp him by now looking at another woman (lol).

Laughing at you Ex. Yes sir, I’m low on iron.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:13 am

And, from the looks of it, she gave it up on their first date! When she said she was a hair model, I thought the hair was hers until she went into the wig shop (lol).

Yes!! She did. I think her friend gave her great advice. She was very nice about it too. Of course Afrika ain’t really “hearing” too much right now. I also thought that was her hair. Especially when her friend was flat ironing before the date. Then she started trying on wigs…lolol

I missed the group’s performance.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:13 am

A bit better educated than most but making just “more than minimum wage”.?.

@Button..u stretching just to minimise Reio? :lol:

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:14 am

We have got to get our sisters to aim just a wee bit higher. On the preview for the next show, she and the young chick were in the restroom fighting :shock: I couldn’t do a reality show. Nuh uh.

Reio

October 9th, 2013
11:18 am

Look. I used to dump women. I don’t deny this. Never bragged about it. Never saw it as a macho “Hump’em & Dump’em” Kick, that some guys seem/seemed to get off on. Hell, there were several that I really hurt. And I knew it. And as a result of my witnessing this genuine hurt that they felt, I too, began to hurt. Saying to myself; “Maybe you should give it/her another try.” or “She’s actually pretty nice”, or “She’s as sweet as she can be.”, or “She’s absolutely adorable, just kinda young and a bit wild.”, or “You can put up with this aspect of her personality, if you tried harder.”, or “Well, she……….” All kinds of things would run through my head. But I thought better of it and moved on. Primarily because, the overriding factor in my decisions to end these relationships, was my desire for matrimony and an unwillingness, on my part to just settle.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:18 am

“…anyone accidentally/on purpose sleep with the wrong twin or a relatively that closely resembled?”

That is too funny. Twin I can somewhat see (not really), but definitely not a relative that closely resembles your SO…that’s not a slip up, that’s a wish wanting to be fulfilled.

I love Reio’s stories too.

Button

October 9th, 2013
11:20 am

Exiled – I’m just sayin :lol:

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:21 am

Celise a ~ let’s just say her voice isn’t “stellar” and Vawn told her so in not those words (lol). They need work, but they’re decent. Need a little polishing. Fighting in the restroom? I missed that preview.

Where’s Klymaxx when you need them?

disco

October 9th, 2013
11:26 am

leggs – i changed schools in junior high and befriended a twin not knowing she was a twin. I go up to the other twin all chitchatting and whatnot and of course, you know they clowned me. I felt like the village idiot. lol.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:26 am

Leggs – It was a hot mess. I’m guessing they’re at some function and Afrika is in the restroom. The young chick comes in. Afrika remark that she’s stalking her. A few more works and hair is getting pulled.

I guess I’ll have to set the DVR on Tuesdays, if I’m not home….lol I just happened on it last night.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:27 am

Vawn strikes me as that dude that can say that kind of thing re her voice and it’s okay. Not saying he’s not right or on the mark, but he just strikes me as being able to do and say and act however he pleases.

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
11:28 am

afternoon….

bait -n- switch……them Craigslist, and Backpage gals good for that kinda mess……chic shows up and you be like, “da hell” (I saw ya Ex )

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:28 am

words, not works

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:28 am

Reio..since u admittedly dumped a lot of ladies,are there women that u honestly “saved”from the smash/hunch,even when they wanted u to smash,simply because u knew u waz not compatible with them and their ways?

any crazies coming at u after the dump?…just because or because they felt violated after u hunched?

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:30 am

chic shows up and you be like

:lol: i aint say none

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:31 am

Celisea ~ are you are aware that Vawn is a music producer. He’s “industry.”

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:31 am

them Craigslist, and Backpage gals good for that kinda mess……chic shows up and you be like, “da hell”

Lawd, I’m am ca-racking up today. Just the visual with this. I can imagine a “shim” showing up a time or two. This don’t seem safe though… Still, funnneeeee

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:32 am

Leggs – Yes, I heard Tribble say it last night. I get he would be the one to “critique” her voice, but he’s just waay too much of “da man” for me, right now…lol

What’s Backpage??

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
11:35 am

Celie…..real talk….I was staying in Marietta, off Powers Ferry….it was late one night….so I was like wth, lemme see what’s on the “list”….talkin bout this bad ass broad was advertising for the low-low….so hell, why not…..low and behold, broad shows up looking like a wilderbeast….I slammed the door in that broad’s face….

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:37 am

I am having a massage this afternoon…im drooling at the prospect of good vibes im gon be feeling…

i hope her fangas are heaven!

Reio

October 9th, 2013
11:37 am

Actually, yes , Ex, I did. Once I decided that it would be best for me to end it, I did. Didn’t care whether we had been intimate or not. And, I suppose, this will sound like I was only out for the puzzy, but as I look back on it, most of the relationships that I ended, ended after we were intimate. Some, I ended beforehand, but most were afterwards.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:37 am

O/T: 2C, I thought of you this morning. You might be proud of me but more than likely you’ll make fun of me. I have on a beautiful, long skirt that I bought 20 years ago (lolol). I still get compliments on this skirt.

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
11:38 am

EX….does the massage come with a “happy ending”…..

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:40 am

Celisea..these low down reality shows are not good…they condition u in time.

Trust….u subconcously get nuggets from there in ur head and if its low life.it rubs in somehow….

its like going to the strip joint every other weekend…cant see how thet can be good for any man….or woman….

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
11:40 am

Leggs….fa real, I ain’t mad at anyone who can keep their clothes fresh all this time, and still rock it…..let alone, fit in it!

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
11:44 am

2Can – That is hi la rious….lololol

MMeello – I have watched more trash t.v. than planned. I think I’m okay though. I’m disagreeing with the shenanigans and what pops off about 80 percent of the time. I don’t think I could be influenced…lol You definitely won’t see me scratching and clawing over a dude. Neither throwing drinks….unless someone comes for me :) :)

Dern, I wanna go with MMeello…for real…lol I’m be in the dentist’s chair. No massage there.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:45 am

2C…that depends on the hosts and how we gon respond to her/them…u got be spontaneous if the situation warrants it…

but nah,we aint going to buford hwy or any of them ching chong under cover places..

disco

October 9th, 2013
11:45 am

leggs – ouch. that there is a sure sign of age. I think back on my grandfather and uncles talking about “girl I got belts/hats/shoes older than you”.

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
11:47 am

2C..im gon with the Queen..so it will be str8 and narrow…no side eye drooling..nada!

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
11:52 am

disco ~ no “ouch” here. No one would even know this skirt is that old. Looks like any other skirt hanging in stores right now. And can’t be an ouch because I can still fit in it! That’s a blessing. Also, it’s a sign of buying quality clothes, not necessarily age (lol). Wish I could take a pic and send to you.

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
11:57 am

C~ I didn’t make it past the 1st page reading but you were spot on chica! great assessments! :) Howdy MIA!

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
11:59 am

kimmie great 10:45 chica!

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:00 pm

leggs – I’m not judging you or the skirt. just saying “ouch” in general because of the statement that I grew up hearing. I now find myself thinking about how old this suit is or when I bought this purse. having old stuff that you bought new can only mean one thing. again I say, “ouch”. lol. I recently attended a white party in a suit a friend gave me close to 10 years ago. I sent her a pic and she was like “dang you still have that?” that’s it. I’m going shopping this weekend. getting me something NEW. lol.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
12:02 pm

Hey there Lady! Good to read ya!

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
12:03 pm

:lol: :lol: @disco!

I bought a gorgeous hot pink dress over the summer but haven’t found the right shoes. Now this goes to show that I have too many shoes (I didn’t really say that). About a week ago I came across my brown and pink sling back shoes that would go perfectly with that dress. Now, I have to wait until next summer to wear it since it’s sleeveless. Bah Humbug!!!

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:06 pm

leggs – hot pink???? I’d ask if it could transition into fall but hot pink??? lol. I already went through my summer dresses to see which ones would work with boots and a jacket. hey, you gotta make it do what it do.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
12:08 pm

Yep, a deep hot pink (lol). Perhaps it’s a deep fuschia. I know it’s not mauve (lol). It’s a deep, rich pink.

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:12 pm

forgive me blog but it’s slow and folks are probably at lunch.

leggs – so, on a humbug I watch scandal last night. must say, I stand by my opinion from the end of last season. I no longer like Olivia. she just irks me now. she may be book smart but she’s man dumb and she’s still soft. just uggh. I found myself wishing mellie would have just whooped her behind in the bunker. I think mellie can take her.

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
12:14 pm

disco, I do agree with you there…..Olivia is quite man-dumb!!! and when they were going over her past, she also seems like she hunched her way to the top…..

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
12:14 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: oh, disco! I am not surprised. Your post reminded me of what you said about her earlier this year. Yeah, I don’t think you could stomach watching Olivia slide into stupidness on a regular basis.

Robert

October 9th, 2013
12:17 pm

“How common is this bait and switch problem in dating? ”

Once upon a time I dated a woman who I thought, had long hair and pretty green eyes. I thought her hair and eyes were real. One night she was taking a shower and I noticed her fake long hair and her fake green eyes (contact lenses) were on the table. She looked totally different without her accessories (10 years older or more). Her natural hair was cut short, but looked good on her, and her eyes were brown. I wondered why she would try to change her looks? Sometimes we can over do-it when all we have to do is be ourselfs. She was already naturally beautiful.

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:18 pm

2C – I ain’t even mad about her making it to the top I just can’t stand that she has no backbone. always talking about “no. don’t. stop” and then being bent over something. she’s a dingbat.

leggs – I do get quite annoyed. lol.

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
12:20 pm

yeah I think mellie will give her a round! but to know your husband don’t want you how can you beat the mistress down……shonda rhimes is doing it prime time lol

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:21 pm

Thanks Lady! Good to read ya!!

she also seems like she hunched her way to the top…..

2C – Okay???? Yeah buddy!

disco – Even though I love Scandal, I agree Olivia does get on my nerves sometimes, especially with all the trembling!!!

And I still can’t understand why they put Harrison on those same country-behind checkerboard shirts!!! Olivia is so sharp, but come on with Harrison!!!!

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
12:21 pm

Robert ~ I agree. I’m not a fan of colored contacts, but people want to enhance what they already have. If God didn’t give it to me, it’s not meant for me re: cosmetically changing my features.

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
12:21 pm

cute robert~ lol

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:23 pm

lady – olivia’s beating wouldn’t even be about her sleeping with my man. it would just be because “I don’t like her”. she stay crying all the time anyway. might as well give her something to cry about. lol.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
12:24 pm

In first few episodes of first season, I didn’t care for Millie too much. I’ve changed my mind simply because she’s ruthless. I admire ruthlessness.

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
12:25 pm

wow robert. that was insightful.

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
12:26 pm

disco now that is grown woman and honest sis!!!! :) I respect that beatdown lmbao! :)

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:26 pm

. I admire ruthlessness.

Leggs – Me too, especially for tv. That’s why I like the show, they get straight gangsta with it sometimes!!LOL!!

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
12:27 pm

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
12:28 pm

If God didn’t give it to me, it’s not meant for me re: cosmetically changing my features.

Most definitely. First find your beauty within and it will radiate. Next, folks that can’t appreciate the beauty God bestowed, tell ‘em to kick rocks. All this being “overdone” is just way overboard these days. I was watching the parade Saturday morning with my mom and I tell you, not a single chick, had short hair. And I remember back in the day, either you was born with it or not…mostly not (for black hair). Every chick had hair to her butt. Now, I’m not saying there weren’t any naturals out there, but c’mon all of y’all?? Girls 13 – 17/18, heavily made up to the point of clowndom…but hey, do you.

Your natural beautiful self is “where it’s at.”

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
12:29 pm

Yes, “at”

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:29 pm

Disco – You know, reading your description of your Olivia beatdown gives me an idea. They should have a kinda “street” Gladiator or character of some sort on the show, maybe a friend or relative of Olivia. She could roll in from time to time and go off on Olivia and try to shake some man-sense into her. That would be good!!

Lady~

October 9th, 2013
12:30 pm

funny bluzgirl lol #dead

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
12:31 pm

“no. don’t. stop” and then being bent over something.

ain’t that usually how it works……

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
12:34 pm

@Celisea if everyone went by “natural beauty” a lot of people wouldn’t have a chance. I think it’s ok to enhance yourself a little. Just don’t transform into a whole new person.

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:37 pm

Cel – I don’t knock folks doing what makes them feel good or confident about themselves. But this weave thing has gotten outta hand, along with the gigantic Betty Boop fake eyelashes! The colored contacts thing I thought had played out.

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
12:38 pm

and why does Condoleeza Rice feel Olivia’s character is about her??? was she doing Billy Clint too?

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:41 pm

2C – Condo said that?

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
12:42 pm

YSIC – I disagree with no one would have a chance. People didn’t make themselves and for many many many reasons we see folks we consider “mix-matched.” Apparently there was something about them they found beautiful :)

Kimmie – Yes yes, it’s just dang “unbeweavable” all the dang time now….everywhere? I mean I see folks with “Indian” or “human” hair and they are “beedy bee” everywhere else…lol I mean, get the stuff that fits. Chicks all ashy and looking like chicken heads but got hair to their butts. C’mooon with that!!

We laughed at my cousin’s husband that wear the light brown contacts. Seriously dude? For real?

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
12:44 pm

Kimmie……YES!!!! I was like wth? don’t know if she’s trynna stir controversy or what, but she damn sho did….

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
12:44 pm

Oh, when I go to the hair salon, those ladies that’s spending a grip, say $350 ish for their weaves are crazy…lol There was one lady there last Saturday, AN OLD OLD OLD WOMAN, getting her weave on…lolol

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
12:46 pm

kimmie….in hindsight, tho, the whole black powerful chic, with a white prez, and crazy wife does kinda fit Condi…..and Condi did go to Princeton, as well…

disco

October 9th, 2013
12:55 pm

2C – the problem with the theory is that condoleeza looks a hot mess. on a good day she looks like a lukewarm mess. she’s just, just, just. lol.

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
12:58 pm

2C – Yeah, you right it does fit her!

Durty Burd

October 9th, 2013
12:59 pm

Good Afternoon!

On Topic: It’s funny how all the comments are just dump the person who changed/lied but we all know quite a few of you tried to work it out.. Liz needs to simply ask why he choose to hide his vices and if the answer is tolerable the work it out on the promise this cannot happen again or if you think the dude is worth it.

Dude actually telling WD since the sex is off da chain, they became exclusive does that mean you were still sleeping with other ladies after the First to six smash? She should dump him!

How do you say you are leaving and going to do some work then continue to blog? What is that about?

REIO…Great stories line keep it coming!

That Robert is starting to win over YSIC….

Disco those are some funny bait and switch possibilities

Durty Burd

October 9th, 2013
1:01 pm

Disco….But Condi is the opportunity who is available right now with a limited possibility of being discover..Also Condi might have that fire! :)

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
1:04 pm

Leggs- Rock that dress with a shrug to cover the shoulders.

Re: transformations- I have tried colored contacts just for something different, but I didn’t wear them every day. I’ve also tried weaves and braids. Right now my hair is natural but I rocked a short weave to get through the Chia Pet season. I didn’t want to cut my hair that short and I didn’t want to relax it. I saw the weave as an accessory.

Celisea- $350?!!! What-the-what? That’s a darn car payment!

Exiled

October 9th, 2013
1:06 pm

Lernch..,then I’m gon get touched and felt..

maybe molested in a nice way! :lol:

Tmr tmrw (to quite 2Chainz)

See ya..

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
1:07 pm

Leggs/Disco – To chime in on your earlier, I am not that one-drink woman either. And I don’t have a problem with a person not drinking, especially if you have a drinking problem or health issue, religion, I respect that. Some folks go overboard with the self-righteousness with it though, and try to make others around them feel guilty about it. They spoil the fun. I went out a few times with a dude like that. I told him I was a responsible, social drinker and I am going to enjoy myself and he could do what he wanted.

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
1:09 pm

@DB I admitted to trying to work it out in relationships of yesteryear. Now I don’t have the time for all that.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
1:11 pm

kimmie ~ that would be good.

disco ~ you would be great for that role, except you would want to put your “paws” on her.

If Condo said that, then her ego needs stroking and she’s dumb.

“We laughed at my cousin’s husband that wear the light brown contacts. Seriously dude? For real?” – The only man I laughed and cringed from at the same time with colored contacts was Nick Ashford (Ashford and Simpson).

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
1:13 pm

MsAtl – Noooo lie. She charges about that much. Sometime more, sometimes less. And if I must say so myself, you CANNOT tell that’s it’s a weave. If I had to get one, she would be the one to do mine..lol :)

I was asking/whispering to my stylist on what the chick charges that does it (as there are a couple more but she’s the best). Well heck, she didn’t get to answer. The chick in the chair said she asked that stylist how much it would cost her daughter and she said $350.00. My stylist said, yep that’s about right.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
1:16 pm

I just might do that, Ms.Atl.

Never worn braids or a weave. I did wear a wig when I dressed up as Diana Ross and a hairpiece for my dance recital.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
1:16 pm

My cousin’s husband is probably leaning toward 450 pounds, almost 50 and it’s funny (to us) that he feels he can still pull….with those pretty brown eyes. He’s not a bad looking dude, but c’mon you still thinking like that at this point in your life?? My cousin left him cause him and his brown eye would have chicks in their pool while she was gone.

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
1:20 pm

Leggs- I’ve worn braids twice; I had braids a few years ago, which I wore in an updo and this years I wore tree braids for a little more than a month. I have a formal to go to soon and will likely get a quick weave updo for that. I’ve never tried a wig.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
1:23 pm

Of course that was some years ago….frolicking the the pool

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
2:01 pm

Where is everyone?

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
2:02 pm

I agree, Condi does look a mess….however, the more I think about it, the theory ain’t too far fetched….I mean, seriously, before she became Sec of State, who had ever heard of her? Then, when Olivia’s dad was ripping into her, he even said, “you could have been Sec of State…” so, there could be some truth her statements…..hell, don’t all TV dramas have some semblance of truth/reality to them???

Single and Happy

October 9th, 2013
2:07 pm

2C so you think condi was bent over for Gdub? (LOL) taking his wmd??

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
2:07 pm

Single and Happy

October 9th, 2013
2:08 pm

Enter your comments here

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
2:09 pm

Scandal is based on the job that Judy Smith does in Washington helping bad folk restore their image.

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
2:13 pm

Single- Yes, I kinda do. I recall seeing an interview where she had a Freudian slip and refered to GDub as “my husband.” Look at Item 17 on the most embarrassing political moments.

http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/politicalgaffes/tp/most-embarrassing-moments-of-decade.01.htm

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
2:18 pm

Leggs…..that’s what they want you to think….

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
2:33 pm

If you say so, 2C!

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
2:43 pm

shoot, I didn’t make it up….and how does one make a faux pas like that? Would you EVER refer to someone that wasn’t your husband, as your husband, if you weren’t messing around with him? c’mon Leggs, use some common sense…..

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
2:46 pm

Not to mention, Condi has never been married….so how you let your mouth slip to even say husband???

it’s quiet in here….errybody must be googling, and reading up on Condi and GDub, and the correlation between her and Liv….

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
2:49 pm

@2C I agree with you. But just to give the benefit of the doubt it could be an inside joke. I’ve referred to my godbrother as my boyfriend accidentally on NUMEROUS occasions but we’ve never so much as flirted with each other so I’m not sure why I kept saying my boy— I mean my brother.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
2:50 pm

And, she very well may refer to him as her husband because they spend so much time together. She says it so much behind doors that it slipped and she caught herself. A running joke that would have fallen flat.

“Would you EVER refer to someone that wasn’t your husband, as your husband” – I wouldn’t but many do. Especially in offices. There are many office husbands. I was at a baby shower where the woman’s office husband put together most of the shower and where she referred to him as her office husband.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
2:52 pm

YSIC ~ yes ma’am re: inside joke.

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
2:57 pm

ok……and while she says it so much behind closed doors, that she just inadvertently lets it slip out while talking to others……all the while, Laura is just sitting idly by….yeah, that makes a whole lotta sense…..

anyways…..I’on care….just makes it all the more interesting now that she’s said it….

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:00 pm

And, if it is about Condi, I could care less.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:01 pm

If you think Laura is sitting in on all those behind closed door sessions, how did an affair start?

Adam

October 9th, 2013
3:03 pm

Major reason I stay single, Take me for who I am or get the fudge on. Why is it ladies “say” they won’t try and change you but after you have been together for a while, they always try too.

My personal rules of engagement:
1. Take me for who I am don’t try and change that.
2. Don’t try to wear the pants in our relationship, this is a partnership, not a dictatorship, I don’t ask women out to be my boss.
3. Be fair and civil, this ain’t no one sided street.
4. Don’t Cheat or expect this to be an open relationship.

Simple!

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
3:06 pm

@2C I know I was googling when you said it!

Single and Happy

October 9th, 2013
3:07 pm

Adam, blog rule: must have 10 rules!!!

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
3:17 pm

Adam – Yeah, stay single cause you sound bitter!

DuShawn

October 9th, 2013
3:34 pm

“but we’ve never so much as flirted………” funny you should mention this. I got a fine female “play” cousin. Her parents and mine went to school together and have been friends for more than 50 years. She and I have known one another from birth. We’ve always been mad cool. When we were around 25 or so we slept together. We got it in a few more times over the next several years, but never told a soul (at least I didn’t). Decades have passed since I last hit that. Through the years there have been several family functions where she and wifey would be together. She and her mother were in town this past weekend for the Classic. My mom cooked a big dinner and everyone hit mom’s crib to grub. I told wifey I’m about to swing thru and does she want me to bring her a plate. She said; “Yes, and tell your kissing cousin I said wuzzup”. I’m thinking, dayum how could she possibly now that? That women’s intuition is a muffugga.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:36 pm

Bad news: Just got a call from home. Entire immediate family is driving back to NYC to attend a funeral. My brother’s wife just found out her mother and younger sister was killed by the sister’s boyfriend because she was breaking up with him. She was 23 and the mother was 65.

I will never understand the mentality of “if I can’t have you no one will.”

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
3:40 pm

@Leggs omg I am so sorry to hear that. I’m so sorry for the loss :’(

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:43 pm

Thanks YSIC…People are simply unstable and fragile and shouldn’t be in relationships point blank period!

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
3:45 pm

dang Leggs…..

kimmie

October 9th, 2013
3:47 pm

Leggs – I am so sorry. Your entire family is in my prayers.

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
3:50 pm

Leggs- I am sorry to hear that. Wow! I don’t understand that mentality either.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
3:50 pm

Leggs – Sorry for you lost. Such a tragedy.

Dushawn you get all kinds of side-eyeSSS for that.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:51 pm

That’s why when I first came to this blog (newly divorced) I would always say “stay alert and keep your antenna up.” People are just twisted.

Mrs. SexyCool

October 9th, 2013
3:51 pm

Leggs – {hugs}

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
3:54 pm

“People are just twisted”…..and the sad part is, we never know until the tragedy occurs…..

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
3:56 pm

Oh my God Leggs!!! Many prayers for your entire family! Wow…

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
3:56 pm

I’m almost numb sitting here. Anyway, thanks guys.

DuShawn gets lots of side eyes for his stories, but they are interesting.

YesSheIsCute

October 9th, 2013
3:59 pm

@2C That’s so sad but true. Most sociopaths are very good at hiding their dark side and appearing to be very charming. I feel really bad for the girl and her mother who were murdered and the rest of the family that is affected. It’s so sad to think her life is gone because some twisted guy can’t handle rejection. :(

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
3:59 pm

Yes, he does. He and Reio should keep right on blogging. Sometimes, at my desk I’m hollering. I don’t alway say that though…lol

Leggs – Are you going home with your family?

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:05 pm

No, they’re almost there. They called me from the car saying they will be in NY in a few hours. I have always told them I’m the last to know anything. So, Mama remembered to call me while they were in route. Tsk tsk tsk!!!

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:07 pm

I guess it was her way of shielding me from bad news over the decades since I didn’t have any family here. They never told me much of anything of deaths or sickness. I always found out after the freaking fact.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:09 pm

The wake is tomorrow!

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:10 pm

Leggs – Okay. Sometimes it’s like that with family.

Most sociopaths are very good at hiding their dark side and appearing to be very charming

Yep, definitely. Even here……we have a talented “special” smart, logical, multi faceted, ever so charming blogger. ..IJS I’m wondering if he and Durty Burd are related. :)

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:12 pm

It’s beyond me folks that take other folks lives…and their relatives. Just selfish to say the least

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
4:21 pm

who is Celie referring to?

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:23 pm

LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Nobody 2Can, nobody. Just funning!! :mrgreen:

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
4:24 pm

Leggs – I can imagine you are numb right now. Go home and relax tonight. This is just more proof that you never know what can happen with your life and you must live each day to the fullest and tell people you love them…

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
4:26 pm

Celie, that’s a harsh thing to say, though….sociopath? you should apologize for that one…..

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
4:27 pm

I’ve been trying to bite my tongue, but I just have to say something…

There’s something serious going on in here with Leggs this afternoon and Celisea just had to bring up her own blog conspiracy! Seriously?!?! Not the time to just be “funning”……….

I’m sorry…I couldn’t let that go without saying something. How rude…

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:31 pm

Naw, Bluz, this is the time to be funning. I shared that not to bring the blog down. Seriously, clowning is what I prefer right about now. I was just sharing something with my blog friends.

Willie Dynamite

October 9th, 2013
4:31 pm

Afternoon all,
Stepping in before closing just cause sometimes I do it like that. What?

Leggs- condolences

Cel- aww thank you. I am smart (very, but not special), logical (of course), multi-faceted (only on Tuesdays and Thursdays), and charming (extremely). However I am not related to Durty (sorry). Hahaha

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:32 pm

Thank you anyway.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:32 pm

2Can – Between you and MMeello, y’all say and insinuate more degrading things, especially about woman almost daily. I’ve seen you have some pretty harsh dialog with Beautiful, you being the end of her crush…some REAAAALLLY degrading remarks. I’ve never seen you apologize or even have knowledge that it was a pretty low cut. Again, both you and MMeello. Mmeello NEVER apologizes for the reall really crass things he say.

Again, if we’re going to police folks, then we should tow the line. Like I said, I was just funning. Durty constantly comes on and naaaags folks. I didn’t think he would be offended. Like I said, I was funny with Durty.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:34 pm

Heeeey WillieD!! What’s crackalackin? You are smart, charming and all taht other stuff you named :)

Leggs – I will apologize directly to you if you are offended, but I didn’t “read” you to wanting to be down and out. I took it that you’re going to keep your head up and on the upbeat

Bluzgirl

October 9th, 2013
4:35 pm

Leggs – I hear ya. Looking out for my girl! The word “funning” wasn’t said until after the post. The blog conspiracies get old. Think I’ll be taking a break from here for a bit…

I’ll continue to pray for you and your family Leggs…

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
4:36 pm

here’s what being an outsider gets you….Beautiful and I happen to know one another personally….so our dialogue on the blog extends beyond 5pm when this thing shuts down….and tell me one female that I’ve degraded?

But to call someone a sociopath? You, my dear need to check yourself!

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:37 pm

Celisea ~ like I said at 4:31. No need for an apology. I wasn’t offended

Reio

October 9th, 2013
4:38 pm

Leggs – Sorry to read of your loss and hope and pray for God’s grace upon each member of your family.

disco

October 9th, 2013
4:40 pm

you guys, dushawn told that story once before. well he mentioned the play cousin situation. it might be some truth to it or he writes down his lies. lol.

leggs – I would be livid at getting late information. my momma jokes that I act like I need to know everything. I simply let it be known that I don’t like hearing anything about my people from the streets.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
4:43 pm

Leggs – I know you didn’t :)

2Can – I was talking about myself :) No one here :)

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:46 pm

disco ~ I have told Mama many times how I do not like getting info last minute. I too need time to make arrangements if necessary.

Leggs

October 9th, 2013
4:50 pm

”The new generation of women want men like their fathers but aren’t half the woman of their mothers.” ~ The New Atlanta

That’s a bunch of BS! Men want women to act like their mothers did accepting their leadership simply because they wore pants. Show us you can lead and we will gladly follow. Until then, these boots were made for walking…” – ME!

PEACE!

DuShawn

October 9th, 2013
4:53 pm

disco – my truth is definitely stranger than fiction. I’m sure I have repeated several stories in this forum. I only have so many. All I am now is a played out playa with a bunch of old stories and some dusty azz nutz (with a few gray hairs one um)

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
5:02 pm

2Can – Big ole apology to you, special and a big ole blog hug.

Bluzgirl – MUTE MUTE MUTE MUTE MUTE MUTE….

Night!!

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
5:04 pm

Leggs- I read the first half of your post and started with “Bull..” then read the rest. I agree with your assessment. I will no longer follow someone or allow them to lead for the sole reason that they were born a male. Age makes you a legal adult, your behavior and actions make you a man.
I was listening to the radio yesterday and one man said his grandfather told him that the man manual has been lost and now information on how to be a man has to come from memory. It made me wonder if that is the reason this generation is in such dire straits, because it is not getting passed down from men like it should and women simply do not have a “memory” of being or becoming a man.

MsAtl

October 9th, 2013
5:05 pm

DuShawn- “a played out playa with a bunch of old stories and some dusty azz nutz (with a few gray hairs one um)”- Well Damn!

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
5:11 pm

Celie…..in all seriousness, I NEVER try to degrade any of y’all ladies….yes, I’ll kid, and joke, but degrade? No….and I am not above reproach that I can’t be checked if I ever step out of line….any I apologize to you as well if you’ve ever been offended by any of my remarks……

now c’mere, and give daddy some sugar….

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
5:12 pm

oh, and me, Durty, and Ex are play cousins….

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
5:15 pm

2Can – Thanks…and yep I’ve thought OH NO HE DIDN’T…lol And 2Can, boo (see I called you boo), it’s just not that serious. You might not have tried, but sometime the lack of respect for women is unnnnbelievable. But, I think most women on here know who and what they are and answer accordingly, so we don’t get all bunched and tight wad….we just pass right on by it ;) :)

Now, Imma take a pass on your sugar.

Celisea

October 9th, 2013
5:15 pm

2Can – Long as y’all don’t take it there like Dushawn did with is “play cousin”…..ha ha ha ha

2CPTG©

October 9th, 2013
5:20 pm

No, in the totality of things, it’s not that serious, but one doesn’t want to viewed as someone who degrades women……

so, to all my blog ladies, I apologize if I’ve ever degraded any of y’all……”readers”, y’all too (chumps!)