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Swing my way

If you didn’t already know that Atlanta was Reality TV Capital of the South, you should know now:  TV producers LOVE filming here.  The latest foray in Atlanta “reality” on television is about the secret sex lives of swingers.

As I read about the upcoming series, I remembered the guy I met a long time ago through online dating.   I was so excited about him until he explained exactly what he was looking for: a wife. A wife who would also be his swinging partner. Without getting too graphic, he basically wanted his wife to pick someone out to bring home and enjoy. Um, yeah NO.

This caught me off guard because up until that point, this guy was a home owner, entrepreneur, and a devout Christian.  At least that is the image that he projected to me.  I had a preconceived idea about what a swinger was – and he was not it at all.

What would you do if your date asked how open you were to swinging?

My apologies for yesterday! I did not set the blog correctly.  Bad blogger, I know!

by Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta

244 comments Add your comment

Lee

September 6th, 2013
6:37 am

Swinging is for swings in the park only in my world. I can’t image it ever being a good outcome for those involved, in my opinion… I am sure there are those who will claim our relationship is stronger (i don’t believe you) until the other falls for someone else everyone is smiling roses and daisies..

On a personal note a guy that i was dating (we departed out ways in Jan) called me last night late ( i think he thought i would pick up the phone in my sleep, no not going to happen) I told him to delete my number in Jan.. He needs to stay where he is at. smh

Lee

September 6th, 2013
6:38 am

I accept your apology, no one can be 100% all the time.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!!

Single and Happy

September 6th, 2013
7:06 am

Hello all.

While it’s not my thing, everyone has to find something they’re happy with. So do you.

Without getting too graphic, he basically wanted his wife to pick someone out to bring home and enjoy. Now what if she brought home a guy!! Would he have been okay with that?

This caught me off guard because up until that point, this guy was a home owner, entrepreneur, and a devout Christian. At least that is the image that he projected to me. I had a preconceived idea about what a swinger was – and he was not it at all. so just what did you expect them to be like??

Celisea

September 6th, 2013
7:30 am

Ummm, naw I can’t do it. I like my man all to myself. :) Nuff said!

We were watching a piece one evening on swingers and apparently some sort of convention, and really I was about grossed out. These were middled aged to outright old folks! I wouldn’t want to grow old with a bunch of quirks and fetishes still going on….IJS and yep, that’s just me and how I feel. I’m entitled. :) To see folks 50, 60, 70, sagging and wrinkled, big guts, drooping butts, hanging and falling out of their lingerie pieces was just nasty. They had belts and whips,chains and toys. And frankly, walking around half naked was so NOT sexy…lol Bodies turned to mush and you still tryna switch and swap?? Ewww and ugggh. IDK, it all seemed nasty at that point. I say all that to say again, for me, I wouldn’t want to grow old with these kinds of hang-ups, meaning…can’t get enough WITH JUST MY MAN, one person. Headed to a retirement home, while still looking over in your backyard? Nuh uh!

Now, I get swingers start out young, hawt, vibrant,insatiable appetites, but again I wouldn’t want to be doing this sort of thing because for me, IMO if you don’t put it to rest,likely it’s what you’ll be doing while turning old. I wouldn’t want to be that old person in a home, still reaching and grabbing at the staff (cause I’m horny) but can’t get it up or can’t thrust without tearing or breaking something…lololol Just let me and my boo do the dang thing together. Just us, growing old, on the front porch, enjoying life. :mrgreen:

I might seem narrow minded to some, but hey it’s my mind!!! lolol Swinging??? Got no time fa dat!!

Alright, let me get up and at em. Headed towards the Tennessee state line for a client meeting and luncheon!!

Toodles

Celisea

September 6th, 2013
7:35 am

Thank God for miracles! GMA just played a story where two teens were checking a chick in the next car only to realize she was being kidnapped. They followed the kidnapper and called the cops and she was rescued! Angels watching over her! Fantastic!

Celisea

September 6th, 2013
8:12 am

Enter your comments here

Celisea

September 6th, 2013
8:13 am

Ooops, was unplugging the laptop

The man formerly know as DAN - still...Superior

September 6th, 2013
8:21 am

When I was single, I played that game; but never really understood how a man could share his wife. But hey, to each his own.

Celisea

September 6th, 2013
8:29 am

Ooops, was unplugging the laptop.

YesSheIsCute

September 6th, 2013
8:40 am

If my date asked me if I were open to swinging I would tell him no. Plain and simple that is not my thing. I don’t judge others that choose that type of lifestyle or have that type of fetish. I, however, enjoy monogamous relationships. Polygamy, polyamory, etc. all those things are NOT for me.

Robert

September 6th, 2013
8:56 am

Back in the day (1990’s) my best friend talked me into going to a swingers club in Miami, FL. This is what I saw;

The Women
- To me it looked like most of the women were bi-sexual
- Most of the women were middle age (35-45) – Cougars
- Younger women (20-30) were hired help to attract men – Prostitutes
- I saw very few married couples

The Men
- Like most of the women, they were bi-sexual – Down/Low Brothers
- Most of the men were middle age, acting young(35-55) – Players
- Younger men (20-30) were hired help to attract women – Prostitutes
- Most of the men were aliens (hispanics, africans, etc.) – Green cards

So if you are a gay, bi-sexual, down/low, illegal alien man or woman the swinging lifestyle might be the right place for you.

Swinging is not for me.

2CPTG©

September 6th, 2013
9:09 am

morning…..

I like a lotta stuff, but swinging ain’t one. hell naw!

Reio

September 6th, 2013
9:12 am

Morning all!

“My apologies for yesterday! I did not set the blog correctly. Bad blogger, I know!”

Apologies excepted. Wondered what was goin on. Thought my computer was on the fritz.

Anyway, I’ve never done this. Never thought about it seriously. Always a one woman man. If a girlfriend would ask me if I were interested in this, with an eye on convincing to try it, obviously I would say “no”, and then proceed to prepare to let her go(I used to dump them fairly quickly). One slip up from my “No Slip Up” list, and they were gone. This would be a slip up from that list.

As I understand it, you have to have a partner. But I was watching a documentary on A&E(I think), where they said that some swingers were letting some single black men(who didn’t have a partner) in cause they tended to pack quite a bit extra stuff. They specifically mentioned black men as the ones most likely to be let into their swing club without a partner. So, I don’t know, I guess rules will be broken, if enough people want it. Not for me though. Most of the people seemed to be between, say,30-50 though. No elderly. They aired this documentary about 3 years ago, I think.

The man formerly know as DAN - still...Superior

September 6th, 2013
9:13 am

@Robert,

If there were prostitues there, I never knew.

Most of the parties I went to had more single males than unicorns and couples. There were more than a few young couples that were “experimenting”. The older couples were “having fun”. Most everyone was straight, unless they were getting it in behind closed doors.

And your “alien” comments disturb me. So I’ll not be commenting on your posts further.

Bluzgirl

September 6th, 2013
9:15 am

Morning!

No thank you on the swinger stuff. I’m too jealous to see my man with another woman! LOL! I won’t judge anyone who does choose this lifestyle, though, even until they are old and wrinkly. I guess elderly people are supposed to just have vanilla sex if they are even supposed to have sex at all…

Miss Moni

September 6th, 2013
9:17 am

GOOD Friday Morning MIA!!! :-)

Nope, swinging is absolutely NOT for me.

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
9:17 am

Good morning and regarding the topic, I was never brought up to be stingy….However, when it comes to my man and intimate goings-on, that is not something I’d be willing to share. I’m just not wired or equipped to deal with all the things that come along with that type of situation….lesson learned. TGIF!

The man formerly know as DAN - still...Superior

September 6th, 2013
9:22 am

@Slim

A “lesson learned” comment requires explanation…..

Bluzgirl

September 6th, 2013
9:25 am

I had a married friend who decided to try the swinger stuff and brought another man into the bedroom. She ended up falling for this man and started seeing him on the side. Her marriage was messed up after that. I think they stayed together for a while because of their daughter…I haven’t been in touch with her in years…

Miss Moni

September 6th, 2013
9:28 am

-SlimNu When I say I feel you on the “lesson learned”, LOL!!! Oh YES, TGIF!!! :-D

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
9:32 am

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
9:34 am

Dan – Let’s just say an experiment in theory might sometimes seems like “fun”…however, when you actually conduct the experiment, a formula is off, something isn’t mixed right and BOOM, experiment failed. Let’s just say I ended up leaving the lab during said trial run. ;-) I have filed that away in the “Young, fun, and dumb” cabinet.

The man formerly know as DAN - still...Superior

September 6th, 2013
9:39 am

see, and there’s the rub. I the hands of a competent scientist, experiment variables are planned for and responded to in the moment.

But I gotcha

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
9:40 am

Dan – I guess I wasn’t much of a scientist…at least not that kind. lol

Reio

September 6th, 2013
9:42 am

I can’t even remember anyone in my past that was even rumored to be into this. I knew guys and gals that would pretty much sleep with anybody, anytime, anywhere, but no swingers in a swing club.

Just wondering, if anybody knows, or has heard; Does this activity take place in one big room? Do they go to separate rooms? Is anal a prerequisite? Does ANYTHING go? What kind of air freshener is best? Cause I would imagine a ‘Professional Strength’ air freshener would be what’s needed, during this and afterwards. Just wondering.

Miss Moni

September 6th, 2013
9:43 am

-Reio I’m cracking up at the “Professional Strength” air freshener!!!

YesSheIsCute

September 6th, 2013
9:44 am

This swinging thing and the other marriage blog post makes me thing: out of curiosity how many of you guys on the blog (married or single) are perfectly happy with the thought of having one partner and one partner only?

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
9:48 am

“What would you do if your date asked how open you were to swinging?” – I would tell him I wasn’t open to swining. If he doesn’t immediately ask for the check, I’d enjoy the rest of the evening until date was over. If that’s his thing, more power to him. Who am I to judge what turns another on.

Good morning.

2CPTG©

September 6th, 2013
9:49 am

Cutie….I’d be perfectly happy to find the ONE…..

disco

September 6th, 2013
9:54 am

good morning. what fun we are having up in here this morning. my very first thought was that song from back in the day “shorty swing my way, shole look good to me”. anyway, folks want to swing? I say swing on. I, for one, can see how things can get boring. I know couples claim they do this that and the other to keep things spicy but let’s face it, some folks get caught up in their routine. same moves, same way, same order, over and over and over. for that reason I can see the appeal of swinging. might be the same trick but a new dog puts a new spin on it. lol.

Reio

September 6th, 2013
9:59 am

YesSheIsCute – “…perfectly happy with the thought of having one partner and one partner only.”

Well, I am. Always have been. As a younger man, with the same hormones as others, sure, I wanted to jump on pretty much everything I saw. It was biology. Nothing I could do about that. But, even as a much younger man and teenager, I knew that the girl/woman I was with, was also a human being, with feelings and emotions, whom deserved respect. I could have played around, hell, I can do it now, but I believe in respecting women, above all else. So to go out and cheat on them would/will be to disrespectful for even me to have to contend with, even if she never found out.

Miss Moni – Yea. Glade, AirWick, Lysol, Fabreez…or any of that other sh!t they sell at the grocery stores or COSTCO or WALMART……..won’t cut it. Probably gonna need some powerful stuff. Perhaps even a hydrogen bomb to wipe out all of the germs and bacteria. Just sayin.

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:00 am

Reio ~ when you see that the topic is the same as the previous day’s topic, go see if submit box is still open. If it is, we still blog. It’s called “back dooring” or “hijacking the blog!”

The man formerly know as DAN - still...Superior

September 6th, 2013
10:01 am

@Reio

There are house parties, hotel parties, and various clubs throughout Metro Atlanta…so depending on where you go, the action takes place in different places.

Reio

September 6th, 2013
10:02 am

Leggs – Thanks. I’ll make a note of that.

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:04 am

Celisea ~ I saw the segment of the two boys helping the kidnapped woman on the news the other day. Warmed my heart. Bet more people will be looking into cars now.

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:07 am

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
10:09 am

how many of you guys on the blog (married or single) are perfectly happy with the thought of having one partner and one partner only?

Me, me, me, meeeeeeeeeee (said waving and jumping up and down)

Reio – funny guy ;-)

Reio ~ when you see that the topic is the same as the previous day’s topic, go see if submit box is still open. If it is, we still blog. It’s called “back dooring” or “hijacking the blog!”

Leggs/Reio – No industrial strength air freshner needed :lol:

MsAtl

September 6th, 2013
10:09 am

Morning All!

I will say it again- I do not share; keep your toys out of my sand box. If swinging is for you, then that’s fine, but no I will not participate. Also, if you are into swinging, then you are not for me. Other than that, consenting adults can do whatever. If I were asked, I would say no, plain and simple. I consider myself almost much open-minded and will try a lot of things (once) but that is not something I am interested in trying.

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:16 am

Oops, didn’t notice WD posted a link.

Reio

September 6th, 2013
10:17 am

Also, just wondering. Do they designate one or two individuals to go around spraying air freshner? If so, do they spray at regular intervals?, say, every thirty minutes or so? Who buys the air freshner? Do all of the participants have to chip in on the cost? What if the one designated to spray, leaves? How do they decide who the next sprayer will be? What if he/she refuses to spray? What if they can’t find the can, cause the guy that left, put it down somewhere? What if he took it with him in anger? What if he stole it? What if the spray is the wrong scent for some participants? What if they run out of spray? What if the spray gets in somebody’s eyes by mistake? What if th……….Too many questions…………..too many questions. Not worth it. Just wondering.

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
10:20 am

Reio – WIth all the unanswered air freshner questions, I’d say just say No to swinging. It’s obviously too complicated. lol

disco

September 6th, 2013
10:21 am

seems like there is a lot of emphasis on swingers clubs. also seems like more than a couple of folks have been to swingers clubs. why? curious? intrigued? lol. actually the few folks that I know that are into the lifestyle don’t frequent the clubs. they swing/swap/share in the privacy of their own homes.

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:23 am

Reio ~ I’m here eating a banana when I spit some out laughing at your post re: who sprays…very funny.

Bluzgirl

September 6th, 2013
10:24 am

I had another friend who was going to start a business of throwing swinger parties in Atlanta. She wanted my ex’s band to perform at the parties. I wasn’t too sure about that, but was going to go with him to keep an eye on him!

Durty Burd

September 6th, 2013
10:24 am

Good Morning!

Did you see the pictures of the 4 young ladies who are swinging 3 are not bad, I think I need to find me a swinging lady…j/k

I know a few folks who either are swinging are have swung before…These folks are not old, their are some real lookers who participate. I mean some real fine women who likes to get the strange dizzle…

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:28 am

Durty ~ I’m a woman and I thought same, 3 aren’t bad.

Bluzgirl

September 6th, 2013
10:28 am

disco – I would be curious to go to a swingers club…not to participate, but to observe. I don’t think I’d make it too long. I’d rather watch p0rn at home!

Leggs

September 6th, 2013
10:28 am

That’s what I don’t understand, getting strange dizzle increases chance of strange diseases.

MsAtl

September 6th, 2013
10:29 am

Reio- “Perhaps even a hydrogen bomb to wipe out all of the germs and bacteria. Just sayin.” Lol. See, I don’t even like using the gym equipment or taking my shoes off at the airport. I would not do well with germs and fluids all over the place.

SlimNu

September 6th, 2013
10:30 am

Bluz – I must say i’ve never heard of having a live band perform while others are getting it in. I’m sure it would take a lot of talent and concentration to keep a beat with a stiffy. :shock:

Seriously fellas, do you really think you could handle watching your woman get pumped by some other dude?…then come back to you?