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Dating: Failed the cooking test

My friend Grant wants to ask his latest romantic interest to go take cooking lessons.   After getting a little sample of her culinary treats, he actually believes this idea will not offend her.  Grant grew up with a Mother who did not work outside the home.  He always does this cooking test to any woman he dates.  If she fails, he literally loses interest in her!

Of course, this is one of the reasons why Grant is so picky and therefore still single.  He believes that a woman should know how to cook some things.  He even thinks it is fine to let a woman know when her cooking skills don’t meet his standards.  I don’t know how I would react if a man asked me to go get cooking lessons, though.  This is something that seems a little extreme.

I understand the importance of anyone, man or woman, being able to cook.  What would you do if someone you were dating complained about how you cooked? Would you be willing to go get a cooking lesson?

Have you ever had to tell someone that their cooking was awful?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating

339 comments Add your comment

Lee

August 7th, 2013
7:15 am

What would you do if someone you were dating complained about how you cooked? It would be the last time we saw each other.
Would you be willing to go get a cooking lesson? I think that would be fun but i can follow recipe if i don’t know how to cook something.
Grant needs to go look at the date: 2013 where women work (some 2 jobs) and go to school have many different interests -climbing that corp. ladder with their goals and dreams.
My question to Grant is what would happen if his lady had to work late would he sit at the table waiting on her to fix his meal and if it wasn’t fixed he would drop her ??? or would he be a MAN and fix it himself. ???
My last day of Hell for this week, I so need a new job.
Going to Destin — never been heard it is nice there… Cant wait to sit on the beach listening to the waves hit the shore — Aaaaaa peace

Have a Wonderful rest of the Week

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
7:46 am

GOOD Wednesday Morning MIA!!! :-)

So Grant wants his GIRLFRIEND to take cooking lessons??? Well, if he doesn’t plan on making her a WIFE then I think he needs to stay in his lane. Cooking for a man is something I believe are WIFE DUTIES. As a girlfriend, I am not obligated to cook for my date. If I choose to share a meal with you then that’s me being kind, but don’t think that I owe it to you to do so.

As a BOYFRIEND, if you want your Mama’s cooking then go to your Mama’s house and let her cook for you! Or maybe he can offer to cook WITH her and pass on some of his kitchen secrets. Tread lightly because if the relationship is fairly new then Grant is more than likely going to get an earful!!! BTW, can Grant even cook?

Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s 2013 and in the world of Google, YouTube, Pinterest & Crockpots, there is really no reason why any person shouldn’t know how to make at least 2 good meals. If you choose to just NOT cook at all or improve your skills, then that’s a personal choice that you have to live with.

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
8:00 am

hey hey hey!

Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a wonderful day

Have a great trip Lee

Diva could you give the age of these people.

As far as cooking, I wouldn’t have a problem with a woman not knowing how to cook, but I would have a problem if she’s not willing to learn! If there is something I like prepared a certain way and she can’t seem to get it, then I’ll cook it myself. I would find US a cooking class so we both can learn.

Now to the testing part, when ever I find out someone is testing me, we’re through. have ALWAYS been too old for those types of games. Recently had a woman asking me to bake her a cake, told her I hadn’t baked one since high school. After weeks of going back and forth about it. She said she asked just to see how much I cared. If I really cared I would have done it. Then got mad because I told her I’m to old to be playing those games. Last time I talked to her :-)

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
8:17 am

-Single No she didn’t ask you to bake her a cake, LOL!!! I would have loved to see your facial expression!!!

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:21 am

Is it Hump day! hoodie hooo

My question: Can Grant cook? Can his mother cook? he may think his mother’s cooking is the bomb BUT to someone else it may not be. I can cook but someitmes even I’ve messed up a meal or two or let me hush. I think he’s being to hard on his date, give the girl a break. Not everyone has culinary skills, if he like the girl then he should be kind and patient and schedule cooking class for the both of them or make an evening of youtubing different recipes for the two of them to cook. That is IF he’s into her and want something meaningful. To dismiss a person because they can’t cook is a little shallow imo.

What would you do if someone you were dating complained about how you cooked? If I know it tastes bad and he says it tastes good then he’s not being honest and my feelings may be a lil hurt. I’d appreciate an honest feedback knowing that I’m not the only one thinking the food should be tossed.

Have you ever had to tell someone that their cooking was awful? Not to his face! :lol:

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
8:27 am

Miss Moni, the facial expression came after a couple of weeks of going back and forth when I had to state, Damn, what part of I don’t do cakes don’t you understand!! (LOL)

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:28 am

Lee – Destin is BEAUTIFUL, the water is turquise (sp) relaxing, have fun!

Miss Moni – you are bringing it so early :lol:

Single – I destest games too

ok if the one cook the other should clean the kitchen ijs
I shouldn’t have to cook AND clean the kitchen.

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:30 am

Single – that was detest not destest
turquoise —thank you google!

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
8:32 am

button, in my house my mom could cook, but my dad, he could throw down!!

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
8:34 am

-Button Once upon a time when I was 22, I did tell my boyfriend at the time, that I didn’t really like a meal that he prepared for me. Well that was the LAST meal he ever cooked for me, lesson LEARNED!!!

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:34 am

Single – I don’t do cakes, cookies et al

baking was never my favortie thing to do. I try but can’t get it right. So I stick with what I know, entrees. I remember making biscuts in home ec back in middle, flour everywhere.

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
8:37 am

-Single That is annoying when someone continues to ask you the SAME question, after you’ve already given them a response the first time.

-Button No time like the present to go ahead and state what it is upfront, LOL! Oh yeah I agree, whoever cooks shouldn’t have to clean the kitchen unless you live alone!

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:39 am

Single – my dad too! I became a professional plate licker bc of him :lol:

Miss Moni – girlllllll neba eba eba tell a man he can’t cook to his face :lol:

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
8:40 am

Button, I told her I would bake her some brownies, but she didn’t want that, she wanted a cake, so that was the end of that conversation as far as I was concerned.

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:43 am

Momma throws down was favorite cooking show.

Sometimes I hate cooking. If I was a genie I would snap my finger or twinkle my nose and BAM dinner would be done and the kitchen cleaned.

Does anybody else clean as they cook?

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
8:44 am

Miss Moni, isn’t that how most women are, tell them you don’t like something or give instructions on how you like it done, and you’ll never get it done again! (LOL)

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
8:45 am

-Single I definitely learned that was NOT the thing to do, LOL!

-Button YES ma’am, we have to use discretion!!! ;-)

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:46 am

Single – she was a lil miss bug-a-boo — Oh well her loss.

LeeH1

August 7th, 2013
8:58 am

If I was asked about this, I would suggest that both of us take cooking lessons, and see how well he does. It is easy to judge when you don’t have the work or responsibility. But after the girl gets to smaple some of Grant’s cooking at the classes, then she can see if he is justified in criticizing her. And by the way, would he marry a good cook if she insisted that since she cooks, he cleans? Somehow, I don’t think so.

Meanwhile, Grant seems to be taking the authority view that he is the judge of her. Perhaps his test would be to see if he earns enough money to hire a full time cook and cleaner for the wife- if not, shove off, since he doesn’t meet her standards.

Button

August 7th, 2013
8:59 am

Miss Moni – you live and you learn, you live and you learn.

I’m a semi vegetarian, eating small serving of meat sparingly, soon I’ll be full blown vegan eating a raw diet giving up the stove and invest in a good food dehydrator.

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
9:02 am

-Button I don’t have to have meat, but occasionally I do crave a big juicy steak. I absolutely LOVE seafood too much to ever give that up, LOL!!!

Button

August 7th, 2013
9:03 am

after a couple failed attempts I’m doing good with eating meat sparingly. of course I had to give up the pulix chicken tenders, my weakness, but, with determination I will combat the meat all together!

Button

August 7th, 2013
9:05 am

Miss Moni – for me this is a process, weaning myself off of meat, right now it’s fish, and when I do cook meat it’s organic chicken or grass feed beef. I’m learning to be picky with what I put into my body just like I’m picky with what I put inot my car.

Button

August 7th, 2013
9:08 am

I can change out my car if it gives me problems, break down but this body, chile I only get one, no changing out!

Leggs

August 7th, 2013
9:08 am

“Would you be willing to go get a cooking lesson?” – I would, but since I’m a very good cook it wouldn’t be a slight to my abilities, but rather him wanting me to expand my skills. But, I do realize that’s not the gist of the question.

However, if I was an ok cook and was asked to take cooking lessons on his dime, I still wouldn’t be offended. It’s simply an opportunity to become a better cook.

I got stuck on “wants to ask his latest romantic interest…” – if he’s ending relationships solely on her cooking skills, perhaps the problem might be his palate and the memories of his mom cooking whereby no one will be able to stimulate those tastebuds like his mom did. Is it even possible since he grew up on his mom’s cooking and was so used to her flavor and spice that perhaps she was just ok too. It’s just somethig he grew accustomed to. Since he feels it’s ok to tell the women they’re not meeting his cooking standards, perhaps he should take the classes himself and cook for himself.

Good morning!

Button

August 7th, 2013
9:10 am

Leggs – you said that!

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
9:12 am

-Button Kudos to you, I’m sure you’ll do just fine!

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
9:17 am

-Good Morning Leggs! I’m with you on that! His tastebuds are partial to his Mama’s cooking therefore, no one is going to be able to duplicate that, regardless of how many cooking lessons they take. And so I go back to my original stance, he needs to eat at his Mama’s, LOL!!!

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
9:17 am

Leggs does your arm hurt from patting yourself on the back (LOL)

Button

August 7th, 2013
9:19 am

Miss Moni – thx, I sure hope so. I’ve already had a dream of a fried chicken drumstick chasing me saying eat me eat me and the hotsauce bottle wasn’t far behind it. :lol:

disco

August 7th, 2013
9:20 am

good morning.

HA!!! grant sounds like a little piece of work. his stomach could touch his back for all I care. first things first, later for everyone who expects someone to cook like their momma. the solution to that is to 1) stay home with your momma or 2) let your momma teach you. please.

second, some folks are into cooking and some folks aren’t. little pissy grant (oops, it’s too early for name calling) can’t force cooking on someone who isn’t interested. later for him.

whew – okay, now I’ll read some posts. lol.

SlimNu

August 7th, 2013
9:22 am

Good morning,

I’m an ok cook but I’ve always wanted to take a cooking class. I’m open to learning how to cook new things because simply, you can get tired of eating the same things. As far as feedback on if something wasn’t as good, there is a way to go about it. “I don’t even know why you try” really would not go over well. THEN I’d probably not cook anything else for yo ass. lol

2CPTG™

August 7th, 2013
9:23 am

g’morning……

how to start this off…..ummm, I can cook, so I kinda expect my female companion to be able to cook as well…..one thing about dating women who were raised by a big mama, they usually know how to throw down in the kitchen….you gimme a gal that can take a chicken, and cut it up three ways to some giblet gravy, and you’ve got a winner!!!!
disco, you listenin????

disco

August 7th, 2013
9:23 am

single – really? baking a cake as a test? she was a real dingbat.

Miss Moni

August 7th, 2013
9:26 am

-Disco LOL at the name you called Grant! Tell us how you really feel, LOL!!!

-Slim Yes, there is a way to go about saying things. Grant gone mess around and be single AGAIN!!!

Celisea

August 7th, 2013
9:31 am

My issue is not him wantng her to be a better cook, it’s his attitude over something that’s doable, given the right solution. Yes, I have definite deal breakers but real ones (lol), but what’s up with these dudes Diva writes in about that hand out ultimatums and stuff?? What’s up with that? IMO, save the rank pulling and heel digging for deeper issues, real stuff, things that are a detriment to your relationship, your health, your well being. Not saying he’s wrong for wanting his woman to know how to cook. I don’t disagree with that. He’s entitled to want home cook meals. But that should come with him willing to cook a few for himself. Calling it quits or not offering to pay for cooking classes or not willing to get in the kitchen with her and you’re not her husband, while making demands, is where I have a problem. I’m almost positive if you ask her what are some things or something she’s not pleased with, with him she can name a thing or two.

I tell ya, these new aged folks. He’s gonna run out of women soon…lolol People kill me making demands and stuff.

Grant sounds like he needs to grow up a bit.

Into the Light

August 7th, 2013
9:34 am

Morning, all…

Later for Grant. I wish he would tell me I don’t cook like his momma. Some people…..

LOL@disco. You nailed it with that name. pissy little grant… :lol: :lol:

MsAtl

August 7th, 2013
9:41 am

Morning All!

Generally, it is okay for Grant to believe that a woman should know how to cook; I believe that also. However, Grant is feeling himself a little too much if he considers the lack of cooking skills a deal breaker. Like others have said, it is something you can learn. And as far as a “test,” yes it is time to grow up. He can also find a Groupon and make the cooking class a date.

Leggs- I also noticed that “latest romantic interest.”

Single- I am cracking up at your cake story!

I didn’t learn to cook growing up; I learned as an 18 year old wife. I burned a few meals, but I learned and have been cooking ever since. I made sure my family had home cooked meals at least 5 days a week even when I worked and went to school. I cooked for the last man I dated, but he cooked for me also. If someone complained about my cooking, I would invite him to cook the next meal.

Leggs

August 7th, 2013
9:45 am

Single ~ are you referring to me tooting my own horn on knowing how to cook? If so, No, my arm is not tired (lol).

Leggs

August 7th, 2013
9:47 am

MsAtl ~ sounds like he’s running through women, dismissing them atfter a few weeks or 3 months. Grant has the 90-day rule in cooking like some women have in sexing. If you don’t know how to cook and after 3 months haven’t perfected one of my favorite meals, it’s tims to BOUNCE! Get to stepping (thanks disco).

2CPTG©

August 7th, 2013
9:47 am

original comment is still awaiting moderation, so I’ll post it again…..

g’morning……

how to start this off…..ummm, I can cook, so I kinda expect my female companion to be able to cook as well…..one thing about dating women who were raised by a big mama, they usually know how to throw down in the kitchen….you gimme a gal that can take a chicken, and cut it up three ways to some giblet gravy, and you’ve got a winner!!!!
disco, you listenin????

SlimNu

August 7th, 2013
9:48 am

are you referring to me tooting my own horn on knowing how to cook? If so, No, my arm is not tired

:lol: :lol: Ya’ll getting off to a good start this rainy, humid, muggy morning.

Whatever curls I had in my hair when I left the house this morning, must’ve stayed at the house. Que the chia pet look in 5…..4…..3…..2……. POOF! :shock:

disco

August 7th, 2013
9:50 am

atl – I have a friend who was child number 10 out of 11. consequently she grew up being told to simply stay out of the way. got grown and couldn’t cook a thing. she was determined to learn though. she spent some years as a stay at home mom and dedicated part of her day to practicing cooking.

2C – that’s just so country. some years ago I had bought a fryer chicken (on sale apparently) and got up and went about cutting up a chicken for Sunday dinner. mentioned it to a friend who said why didn’t you just buy it already cut up? seems like I saw light bulbs, heard angels singing, the whole nine. haven’t bought a whole bird since. lol.

SlimNu

August 7th, 2013
9:51 am

Grant has the 90-day rule in cooking like some women have in sexing. If you don’t know how to cook and after 3 months haven’t perfected one of my favorite meals, it’s tims to BOUNCE!

Who want’s to wait there while you clean your plate before you tell me I passed or not. This was too dry, too salty, not seasoned enough, not smooth enough, not thick enough….. GTFOH! Buddy will be wearing those lumpy mashed pertaters lol

Leggs

August 7th, 2013
9:51 am

MsAtl ~ same here. I left home at 19 not knowing how to make much of anything. I’ve burnt many pots of rice. My friends regulated me to making salad and I didn’t like that. I got tired of people saying this was good or that was good and here I am with a freaking salad a blind man could make. Through trail and error and finding the proper balance of seasoning, I’ve perfected many dishes, not just for my palate for apparently my friends as well. Now baking alludes me. The three things I can make from scratch is a sour cream pound cake, blintzes and peach cobbler. The blintzes aren’t really from scratch since its made with store bought bread.

2CPTG©

August 7th, 2013
9:54 am

country?????

So I guess Thanksgiving dinner round your way is all store bought?

MsAtl

August 7th, 2013
9:55 am

Disco- I am right on board with your friend. I was child #8 and told to stay out of the way.

Leggs- I latched on to Uncle Ben’s shortly after I left home; it is impossible (almost) to mess up a pot of Uncle Bens rice. Lol @ having to make the salad. I have a friend that is relegated to bringing the drinks or store-bought things.

disco

August 7th, 2013
9:58 am

2C – thanksgiving is a special occasion and it entails simply baking the whole bird, not cutting the bird up into little cast iron skillet sized pieces. big difference player. lol.

2C – and by the way, I have bought turkeys. I have not bought any more whole fryer chickens. lol.

Single and Happy

August 7th, 2013
9:58 am

2C disco, do they still sale whole birds??

SlimNu

August 7th, 2013
9:59 am

Yes they still sell whole birds…I put one in the crockpot not too long ago ;-)