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Should you date older?

I believe most people have an age range that they target for dating.  We know the youngest we would be willing to try.  What about the oldest?  How many years older you are you comfortable dating?

The difference in age can become a problem but I don’t think it is something that is insurmountable.  A friend of mine dated and married a much older man.  The concern she had was having children with a much older man.  They are now pregnant for the third time and he is in his 60s.   Clearly they worked things out!

If you have not considered dating older, what apprehensions do you have for giving it a try?

How much older would you date?  What is the youngest?  What difference do you think it would make in dating a younger person versus dating an older one?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

248 comments Add your comment

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
7:41 am

GOOD Monday Morning MIA!!!

How much older would you date? I would date up to 10 years older. I’m not comfortable with anything beyond that.

What is the youngest? No more than 2 years younger. . . but this is negotiable based on maturity level and life experience. ;-)

What difference do you think it would make in dating a younger person versus dating an older one? Personally, dating someone younger is primarily based on their maturity level and what stage they are going through in life. If they are still trying to “discover” who they are, I’d prefer to bow out. I’d rather be with someone who confidently already knows who they are.

Courtside Seats (With no PSL's added on!!!! )

April 29th, 2013
8:21 am

Morning MissMoni!! :D

I hope your weekend was as FANTASTIC as mine!!!!
Oh and by the way, Dating older is on point….Its the dating of 20 somethings that I can’t understand….. The kinds of things that I present are so far beyond where most of them are………

Hazel

April 29th, 2013
8:28 am

I was always attracted to men at least a decade older than me. I felt that it matched my maturity, and I also wanted someone to guide me and not be on the same page as me as far as life went. My husband is 12 years older than I am. We work very well together. ” I’d rather be with someone who confidently already knows who they are.” MissMoni.

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
8:30 am

Morning, all!

I’d rather be with someone who confidently already knows who they are.
Worth repeating.

Court – do you have the coffee made? I’m sleepy…..

Courtside Seats (With no PSL's added on!!!! )

April 29th, 2013
8:39 am

Morning ITL…No coffee this morning, but I do have fresh fruit and Hibiscus tea……

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
8:43 am

-Court I see you had a FANTASTIC weekend. . . Care to share what you got into??? :-)

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
8:44 am

@Court – Hibiscus tea on a Monday morning? Surely you jest. I need full-lead Sumatra to get me going on a rainy Monday……

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
8:48 am

-Hazel Thank you for sharing your perspective. I see you wanted someone to guide you and that worked for you. Is it safe to say that although your husband is guiding you, that you two are still growing together in the overall relationship?

Single and Happy

April 29th, 2013
8:53 am

Hello all

How much older would you date? 11 years at age 20

What is the youngest? 22 years at age 50

18 to 80 blind crippled or crazy date all (LOL)

Courtside Seats (With no PSL's added on!!!! )

April 29th, 2013
8:55 am

MissMoni, I took a friend to the Hawks game on Saturday…… After the game we went back to my house and feel asleep watching old movies… Got up Sunday morning and went to the Dekalb Farmers market, pick out great freash veggies and seafood..went back to my house and spent the day cooking and watching basketball!!!!

Hazel

April 29th, 2013
9:00 am

@ Missmoni. absolutely. There are a lot of things that we are still learning from each other everyday, while growing together. I will have to add that he sometimes does act like he is 5. ha ha. Guess all men have a kid somewhere hiding in there.

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
9:04 am

@Court: That sounds like a perfect Sunday. *sigh*

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
9:04 am

-Court Awww, that sounds FUN!!! So is this “friend” someone you could see yourself in a committed relationship with? :-)

-Hazel LOL, I agree & think we all have a little kid in us somewhere! :-)

Hazel

April 29th, 2013
9:09 am

@courtside – Dekalb farmers market is a great date place I think. Go get desserts..explore the wonderful nationalities/food there.

Courtside Seats (With no PSL's added on!!!! )

April 29th, 2013
9:10 am

MissMoni…In a word ..YEAH……. :)

DreamsMaterialize

April 29th, 2013
9:11 am

Morning
I date women who are compatible with me. I don’t have a limit, although women in my age group tend be the most compatible with me. Just find what works for you and be happy.

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
9:14 am

Awwwww, Court. That’s so sweet. :)

Morning, Dreamy. :wink:

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
9:18 am

Awww Court, I’m happy for you!!! :-)

Reio

April 29th, 2013
9:27 am

Mornin all!
Can’t really say much here. I don’t recall dating anyone more than 5 years younger or 3 years older. Never thought much about it during my dating years. I’ve always wanted children, so that was always in the back of my mind when meeting someone. But it was never an issue cause everybody that I dated was within, what I thought to be, the proper age range. Although, I must admit that I wanted to date a few that were not. Two were well below my range. Never went out, but thought about it. And, If I’m remembering correctly, there were three that I really wanted to ask out that were beyond my range. One of those was a high school math teacher. I lusted after her while in school, all the boys did. We knew she wasn’t married. Then, after I started college, I attended a high school football game and she was there. We had chit chat and reminisced. Came REAL close to asking to see her at a later date. Cause she asked me “Have you found a girlfriend yet?” I replied “no”. She then responded with “I’m alone as well” or words to that effect. After the game, we lost, by the way(what else is new?), we said our goodbye’s and she walked off after saying “Don’t be a stranger.”
Wanted to go back to the next home game, hoping to see her, but was too afraid she might laugh at me if I asked her out. The car I had was a beat up ford LTD, didn’t want to put her in that jaloppy. So I never pursued her. Probably would have told me to, in so many words, “go to hell and burn.” At least, tha’ts the way I would have interpreted it, had she decided against going out with me. I’d say she was about seven years older tha me. Her name, Miss Jan Morton. WOW! Hehehe…

Courtside Seats (With no PSL's added on!!!! )

April 29th, 2013
9:31 am

LOL…. Seafood etoufee, cucumber and tomato salad…… Yeah…i got all the way down with that!!!! :)

Reio

April 29th, 2013
9:33 am

Hazel – Hi. I’m in Birmingham, but we know about that DeKalb farmes market here as well. Great place. Been there dozens of times. Off Ponce DeLeon Ave, or something like that. Very long road somewhere out there. We always enjoy it. Load up on seafood and spices…..Been telling people around here about it for years.

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
9:40 am

Speaking of spices, Reio, I bought some cherrywood smoked sea salt at the Marietta Farmers Market last week. It is INCREDIBLE. :)

Anyone catch GOT last night????

disco

April 29th, 2013
9:42 am

good morning. I think I’ve reached the age that I don’t really check for age. lol. unless a guy looks incredibly young I don’t even bother asking how old they are. if they look incredibly old there’s really no need to ask. lol. I’d probably be more concerned with how old a man’s kids are.

Reio

April 29th, 2013
9:45 am

Into the Light – This Marietta Farmers Market, is it like the Dekalb one? May need to check it out on my next trip to Atlanta, although it may be a while, cause we crossed the state line this weekend and bought lottery tickets, I’m going to win, so travel to Atlanta will be put on the back burner. Hehehe..

Into the Light

April 29th, 2013
9:54 am

@Reio: No, it’s a lot smaller and only there on Saturday mornings. It’s a fun way to spend a Sat morning, though, just browsing the local vendors.

SlimNu

April 29th, 2013
9:54 am

Good morning All,

I’m finally trying to crawl out from under this sinus rock. As far as the topic, i’m not really interested in dating someone too many years my senior. I tend to stay in a 3 to 5 year radius of my age and 5 is actually really pushing it. (I’ll be 35 in June)

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
9:56 am

-Disco Hey!!! You brought up a great point: “I’d probably be more concerned with how old a man’s kids are.”

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
10:00 am

So Slim, are you more open to dating 3 to 5 years younger?

DreamsMaterialize

April 29th, 2013
10:02 am

Hey ITL. How’s it going?

SlimNu

April 29th, 2013
10:05 am

MissMoni – I was thinking more in the range of my senior, not my junior. I can’t say that dating a younger man appeals to me. So maybe I shouldn’t have said ‘radius’. lol My mom said she see’s me with an older guy but I know I wouldn’t want to go too old. I often hear about issues with dating a guy too far ahead of you because he then feels like he knows everything about everything. I still want to have new experiences together. Not a know -it-all…

Reio

April 29th, 2013
10:08 am

@Into the Light – Saturday is usually the day we head over. I’ll put it on my calendar and check it out. Thanks.
On topic, One of the two women that were too young for me years ago, happened to be the niece of a friend. That fact alone pretty much put her off limits for me, in addition to her youth. She was attractive to me for a number of reasons. Not the least of which, was the fact that she was a wiz kid. Very smart. Entered college at 16. Last I heard, she was in Houston, TX., working for NASA. Cute as she could be too. Hehehe… Hope she found a good guy and not one of these stankin, corroded, corrupt, three legged, demented, used tampons, masquerading as men,walking around. Hehehehe…

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
10:08 am

-SlimNu Ok, I’m tracking now. I too see myself with an older guy, maybe by 2 to 4 years. I totally agree with you in still wanting new experiences together, not someone who’s been everywhere & done everything, LOL!

Single and Happy

April 29th, 2013
10:09 am

Slim knowing it all has nothing to do with age. Most of the times those are guys that just like to control things.

disco

April 29th, 2013
10:11 am

moni – imo, once you are no longer a teenager 2-4 years is essentially the same age. lol.

hey single.

Punkin Eatta

April 29th, 2013
10:13 am

Where are all the regulars? he he he Miss the old heads. he he he

Never mind me, I’m is smart, I’m is important, I’m is kind! :)

SlimNu

April 29th, 2013
10:14 am

Single – Well, i most definitely am not into control freaks either. I briefly dated a guy that started exhibiting those types of traits and it didn’t go over well with me at all. He was older lol

Single and Happy

April 29th, 2013
10:14 am

disco

April 29th, 2013
10:15 am

PE – lol. fat and ugly are you? lol. so many people missed that smart, important and kind was meant to make up for fat and ugly.

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
10:17 am

-Disco I can see that, LOL!!!

Single and Happy

April 29th, 2013
10:19 am

Slim, how much older?

Punkin Eatta

April 29th, 2013
10:23 am

hehehe @disco

Where is Sexycool, Willie Dynamite, Carrington, QC, Luvbug, TheRealKimmie, Grace, Lady J????? A reunionis in order. Calling all you old heads. SHOUT OUT!

abc

April 29th, 2013
10:24 am

I think 10 years in either direction is a practical limit. But, hey, what floats the boat.

Hazel

April 29th, 2013
10:25 am

@ Reio – Yes, Dekalb Market is awesome. Worth at least going once

disco

April 29th, 2013
10:26 am

reio – is Birmingham worth a weekend getaway? I was contemplating hitting up the civil rights institute and whatever else I could scrounge up.

DreamsMaterialize

April 29th, 2013
10:28 am

fat and ugly are you? lol. so many people missed that smart, important and kind was meant to make up for fat and ugly.
disco you would be the one to point that out. lol

disco

April 29th, 2013
10:30 am

dreams – I call that good looking out. just want folks to make sure they know the code. lol.

The man formerly know as Dan - still...Superior

April 29th, 2013
10:31 am

I personally dated women of all ages at varying stages (older by as many as 20 + years and younger by as many as 8 – 10, never anyone under 21).

What I’ve found is that the age of the woman is separate and distinctly different from her mental capacity. I dated older ladies with the minds of teenage girls.

Comparatively, I have dated young(er) women that had some…shall we say…life experiences that forced them to be wise beyond their years.

All that to say, age ain’t nothing but a number; being immature is nothing but a thang

MissMoni

April 29th, 2013
10:33 am

Speaking of age differences. . . Michael Jordan is 15 years older than his new wife.

Punkin Eatta

April 29th, 2013
10:33 am

Just rolling through. I popped in here Friday, didn’t see no recognizable faces…hehehe Thought maybe people jetted early. The scene had drastically changed. Not so good vibes. I’ll get atchall another day.

Peace Out!!

kimmie

April 29th, 2013
10:44 am

Morning Gang!

On topic – I have always dated around my age range and that’s what I married. Can’t stand too young and REALLY can’t stand too old (10-15 year range for both). I never wanted another daddy or one trying to mold or guide me. I’ve always reveled in my growness, and never could stand being told what to do unless it was my dad or my boss. I always wanted someone to build a life with and grow with thru the different stages of life. And I would feel silly with a really young guy, no boy-toy stuff for me, This is all me and what works for me.