I was watching Auntie Oprah (not related except in my head) and she was interviewing Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor. When Justice Sotomayor talked about her marriage that ended, I was struck by something her husband told her. He said that he could not be with her if she could live without him.
It seems her husband had known her since she was a young woman on the cusp of her path to success. At the time, she was inspiring to him because she worked hard. He figured that he would also work hard and achieve too. When he realized that her success was greater than his, things shifted.
I suppose it became a little difficult to be the less successful mate in the relationship as the man. If she no longer needed him, it was not enough that she wanted him. Actually, this kind of saddened me a little. I have seen this same dynamic in many couples. I often wonder if my successful girlfriends will have to temper their achievements so that the men in their lives are at ease. Should they have to?
I don’t knock them if they do. It is a choice, a personal decision every successful woman will have to make. This is why I believe it is important to find a mate after you have reached the peak of your journey. Of course it is harder to do so by then, but it is equally hard to end a marriage that buckles under the weight of success.
What do you think? In order for things to “work”, do you have to feel that you can not live without someone?
What kind of impact does success have on a dating relationship or new marriage?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog