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Your first

Every misadventure we go through brings us closer to meeting  The One.  That’s good news, right? Even the messy break ups and God-awful dates can serve as a learning experience.  If we consider all of our experiences as lessons, we can appreciate the sum of our experiences, including the first person we fell for.

There is something sweet and nostalgic about flipping through old photos or remembering the moments that you felt loved.  Reflecting back on those moments when you felt yourself falling can even be kind of thrilling.

Do you ever randomly think of your first love?  What about your first kiss? Who from your past left the biggest impression on you?

Happy Friday!

By  Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

162 comments Add your comment

Lee

March 22nd, 2013
6:43 am

My first kiss: I was in 1st grade walking home with the boy down the street, he wanted to tell me a secret, at the top of his hill he goes to whisper something in my ear and instead kissed my cheek. I was appalled–i started crying and ran screaming i’m telling –all the way home. We are friends to this day, and he never tried to kiss me again. LOL
Do you ever think of your first love? Yes i do, he died some years ago. :(
Who from your past left the biggest impression on you? They all have; that is why i reframe from dating now.

Single and Happy

March 22nd, 2013
7:15 am

Wow, can’t remember back that far (LOL)

Hello All

Penelope

March 22nd, 2013
7:32 am

Not much reminiscing going on with first or former loves. My husband does an exceptional job filling up that space!

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
7:47 am

GOOD Friday Morning MIA!!!

Do you ever randomly think of your first love? Yes, every blue moon. . .

What about your first kiss? Not at all.

Who from your past left the biggest impression on you? It’s Friday and I don’t want to rehash that on today! ;-D

Exiled

March 22nd, 2013
8:27 am

No I cannot remember my first kiss. I remember my first smash. Aagh..I didn’t know if that was it….to go on or what…hmmmm.

My first love? I think I do..I don’t know if I was in love or it was she who was in love. She kinda made me scared somewhat because she certainly wanted to be wifed. That was in college. She was a good girl,a high school junior of mine. Very sweet and I was her first. Yea,I took her Ozo title!

But college times were Fun times. And as much as this girl was wife material,I was not husband material. That’s the problem with chics! They don’t wanna loosen up and just enjoy and savor the juicy moments.

College?!!!!! :lol:

The very Best Three years of my Life,Pants Down!! :lol:

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
8:35 am

-Exiled I agree that college times were FUN times, but I would also like to point out that first “smash” and first love are 2 different things.

Button

March 22nd, 2013
8:53 am

Do you ever randomly think of your first love? Not unless it’s brought up. Then I remember him and how he broke my heart and I quickly put him out of my mind.

What about your first kiss? I can’t remember. I remember the slumber parties when me and my girls used to kiss the pillows. lol silly as it was, it was fun. The pillow was our learning device. Then we graduated to spin the bottle where we had a kissing feast.

SlimNu

March 22nd, 2013
9:02 am

I do not really think about my first love, at least not in a Oooohhhh I miss that kind of way. I just make notice of the difference of the freshness and newness of a ‘first love’, or what we assume was love, versus how things/feelings/outlooks change as you get older. (especially after being hurt, disappointed, betrayed or whatever) The only thing I recall as a first kiss I believe happened in 1st grade, and I got caught lol

disco

March 22nd, 2013
9:03 am

good morning.

moni – in theory first love and first smash are two different things but for some folks they very well could be one in the same. lol.

button – really? y’all kissed pillows? and played spin the bottle? I only ever saw that game on tv. guess it missed my neighborhood.

first love? I’ve never really been the “in love” type. I liked some more than others but…. I do occasionally flash back on some of the better – to quote exiled – “smash moments”. lol.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:05 am

-disco I get it, some folks actually do view it all the same. . . I didn’t kiss pillows or play spin the bottle either, LOL!!!

Bluzgirl

March 22nd, 2013
9:06 am

Morning!

My first kiss…I was in 3rd grade and he was in 4th grade. Our parents were (are) best friends. We were left with a babysitter as our parents went out and he and I went into the closet and decided to try to kiss. After we kissed, we both went “yuck!!!” Back then, it was gross to have someone’s tongue in your mouth and we didn’t get why people liked it! LOL

Hard to say about my first love…I thought I was in love in middle school…I don’t think you can truly love then, but I still think about him and how he dumped me for my best friend.

Button

March 22nd, 2013
9:08 am

dissco/MissMoni – l@spin the bottle —ol weird as it may seem it was popular in my hood,

SlimNu

March 22nd, 2013
9:11 am

Button – I think I broke my first loves heart because after high school I went on to college and stayed home. So it pretty much dwindled out as far as my interest went. He was a sweet heart but I just staRted to feel disconnected due to the distance and college life. We are cool now but he does not date black women AT ALL anymore…not sure if that’s because of me or not :???:

MsAtl

March 22nd, 2013
9:13 am

Morning All! Happy Friday!

No, I don’t think of my first love in a nostalgic wistful kind of way.

Disco- Spin the bottle was popular when I was a kid too.

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
9:21 am

SlimNu – Your first love is a bonafide, first degree, premeditated, certified, stupid, damn fool. Perhaps not back then, but he is now. I can’t imagine completely dismissing an entire group of people because of what God gave them : black skin, white skin, brown, blue, green, yellow, red….whatever.
A real loser for sure. Not your fault.

Button

March 22nd, 2013
9:21 am

SlimNu- I always wonder what happened to a person for them to make a decision such as that. To say you’ll never date someone of your own race is some serious hatred. jmo

disco

March 22nd, 2013
9:25 am

slim – now that’s a heavy burden to bear. turning a brother off sisters. shame on you. don’t know what’s worse. turning a man off black women or turning a man gay. lol. I’ll have to ponder.

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:30 am

IMO, folks that reminisce over their first love say 30 or 40 years later, never really found love, at least I don’t think. If you found or find love, you won’t have the capacity to still pine over something that happened during a time it was meant to happen.

My first kiss was the 8th grade, with a “high yellow” boy in the 9th grade…lol My friends coerced me to meet on the basement floor at school. Back then there weren’t really that many “middle schools” in Atlanta….all mostly high schools. So yeah, I was with the grown folks…lol He wasn’t my first love though. Anyhoo, that’s all that happened. Y’all know I was hold the goods captive back then…lol

My first smash was DEFINITELY not my first love. He was sloppy and all over the place. Believe it or not, I didn’t smash again for a looooong time after that. I was like “ugggh is that what it’s like?” Then someone came along and convinced me otherwise…lololol It was on after then :mrgreen:

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:33 am

-Celisea I do believe that once you are in love with the “one” then you won’t have time to reflect back over the love(s) of your past. The catch is when you’re single and you have lots of FREE time for reflection, LOL!!! ;-)

disco

March 22nd, 2013
9:34 am

C – I don’t think reminiscing over a first or past love is necessarily the same as pining over it. like we say all the time, everyone has a past. just because you are “in love” now doesn’t make the past love go away. remembering it is no big deal. harping on it might be a big deal.

I just thought of lauryn hill “I used to love him but now I don’t”. lol.

SlimNu

March 22nd, 2013
9:35 am

disco – I don’t think i could deal with turning a man gay :lol:

Reio – He never said it was because of me but ever since then, he has definitely not ever went back to black. If you were to look at his fb page, it would be like searching for gold to find another black person on his page. It is what it is but I do not believe I did anything to him that would warrant him to be completely turned off from black women. I was his first though so not sure if that has something to do with it :???:

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:35 am

MissMoni – LOLOLOLOL, yep that’s exactly how I think about it too! Lots of free time might not be good. Might not be all bad, but it leaves you too open and IMO, sometimes those woulda coulda shouldas will rear.

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
9:36 am

Celisea – Now I understand what ’smash’ means. Had an inkling, but didn’t really click till your post. Too shy to ask also. Learn something new every 11 days, I guess.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:37 am

-disco That is 1 of my fav tunes. Well, anything on the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill album is my FAV!!! :-)

You can’t live in the ghost of boyfriends/girlfriends past. Assess what you did and didn’t like, work on being the best that you can be and move forward. Life is too short to live in the past!!!

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:39 am

disco – I guess the only think I was thinking about when I made that statement are those folks that are on talk shows, crying (tears of joy) and just overwhelmed at the thought that s/he is about to walk out on the stage, that they haven’t seen them in 45 years and that a day has not gone by where they didn’t stop thinking about him/her…since the day they parted. Whether that was the person riding off with someone else, moving to another state, going off to school, etc etc etc…lol

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
9:39 am

SlimNu – Trust me, you had nothing to do with it. He became a stupid damn fool on his own. And when they lower him into the ground, perhaps years from now, he will go to his grave a stupid damn fool.

kimmie

March 22nd, 2013
9:40 am

Morning All!!

Well let’s see – I was a rather late bloomer in the 1st kiss catagory – I was in 8th grade. I remember it being disgusting, the tongue and all! Now my SECOND kiss was all that!! I was “slowdragging” at a cousin’s house party with my cousin’s very cute friend! We were dancing to “There Never Be” by Switch. Our faces touched and next thing I knew we were kissing like mad. He really knew what he was doing in the kissing department and he has stood the test of time with me as the best kisser next to my hubs, no joke. He’s a politician now and every now and then I see him on tv and I cannot help but think about it!

My first smash was just okay. I don’t think about it unless someone brings it up like today. Again, late bloomer in that catagory as well, I was 19. Was going to try to make it to 20 for some reason. I won’t say he was my first love, but he was my first “serious” boyfriend. Don’t think about him much either. He broke my heart, but I recovered just fine. He was in the Air Force and last I heard he had a slew of kids!

DuShawn

March 22nd, 2013
9:41 am

I wake up to my first love every morning. Any chick before her was merely practice.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:43 am

-kimmie My 1st kiss was the Summer before my 8th grade year. You were not a late bloomer, 19 was my age as well. . .

SlimNu

March 22nd, 2013
9:43 am

disco – I agree. The question was do you ever RANDOMLY think about past loves, first loves etc…Even though I may think about a past relationship, it doesn’t mean i want to get back with them or pine over it. Sometimes you can’t see certain issues, lessons or whatever until you’re out of the midst of it. Sometimes it’s good to reflect and see from whence you came to appreciate where you are. ;-)

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:44 am

Reio – LOL

disco

March 22nd, 2013
9:46 am

moni – living life involves making memories. that’s why people do things that are special to them. to make memories. sometimes those memories involve past loves. thinking about the past occasionally isn’t necessarily living in the past. living in the past is a whole new set of issues.

C – yep. those are the extreme cases (of idiocy). lol.

reio – why you going so hard on old boy? if he wants white chicks, let him have at it. more black chicks for the ones who actually want them.

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:47 am

I was a late bloomer too

MsAtl

March 22nd, 2013
9:48 am

DuShawn- Wow! Are you feeling okay today? Or is this the one day you ARE feeling okay? Lol. That was actually a decent response instead of your usual Tomfoolery…

Exiled

March 22nd, 2013
9:48 am

MissMoni..I know there is a difference tween first smash and first luv and kiss.

Wise Diva,unwisely glaringly left out first smash,as if that doesn’t exist or is not marked in our mental calendars and journals.

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
9:48 am

I married my first love. Still am. Ain’t easy though. Never has been. I thought I was in love a number of times before her, but it was probably just lust, nothing more. I was quite young. One of the earlier one’s had some grape bubble gum that she would not share one day , so I fell out of love with her that day. Hehehe.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:49 am

-disco My comment was in reference to those that constantly think about past loves. I agree that life is about making memories, but the key word is to make NEW memories, not continue to relive the old ones.

Once you are married or in a relationship leading to marriage, IMO you shouldn’t still be thinking about what used to be with someone else. That’s all I’m saying, move forward and Live, Love, Laugh! :-)

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:50 am

-Reio Great point. Some people don’t know the difference between LOVE and LUST.

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:51 am

My first love was after my kid’s dad…if that’s possible. I was digging folks and having a good time, but I don’t think I really “hit” with it until I met him.

SlimNu

March 22nd, 2013
9:53 am

Reio – I’m not sweating who he wants to date, it’s definitely his perogative. So no ill-will wished upon him or his death bed. ;-)

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:53 am

MissMoni – Once you are married or in a relationship leading to marriage, IMO you shouldn’t still be thinking about what used to be with someone else

Eeexactly. This is exactly where I was going. Something (IMO), is awfully wrong, if you’re married or seriously booed and still about someone from the past.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
9:55 am

-Celisea We’re on the same page!!!

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
9:55 am

disco, SlimNu – I wish no ill will on the fella. More power to him. I just don’t see the point, or how it’s even possible. To each his/her own. My my my.

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
9:58 am

Reio – You just can’t fathom how someone can take a pass on all the luscious chocolatte/brown/pecan sandy…etc etc etc, walking around, huh?

Reio

March 22nd, 2013
10:01 am

Celisea – You got it. How? Would be my only question. I don’t care about why. Oh well…..

Celisea

March 22nd, 2013
10:03 am

Reio – Mmm hmmm, I don’t blame you…lol

disco

March 22nd, 2013
10:04 am

celisea / moni – y’all are romantics. I am more practical. lol. my point is not to sit around recalling memories but you can’t deny them. anything can trigger them. a song on the radio, a movie on tv. I was listening to biz markie this morning. albee square mall and vapors triggered all kinds of memories.

MissMoni

March 22nd, 2013
10:07 am

-disco Yep, you pegged me just right, I am a romantic. I’m also a realist, just a balanced combination of the two, LOL!!! :-)

disco

March 22nd, 2013
10:08 am

lol. I was just sitting her thinking about memory and that led me to think about all the folks with “selective memory”. boy we know we can get brand new when we want to. acting all like we don’t know what somebody is talking about.

Leggs

March 22nd, 2013
10:09 am

I will start by saying my mind went to something else reading the title. Wasn’t even thinking first love.

Good morning.