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Is dating making you broke?

Cody has been only been seeing Sabrina for a couple of weeks now and he already has to adjust his budget. Why? Apparently, Sabrina likes the finer things in life. Cody likes the fine Sabrina. Now he is doing way too much to pursue her. He feels that she is worth it. I don’t think any man should go to these kind of lengths to get a woman.

Eventually, she will find out he is strapped for cash. If this is the kind of thing that would be a deal breaker, he needs to know it sooner than later. Why would anyone want to go broke trying to date someone? I understand wanting to impress a person. I even get that men want to show that they can be a provider. Where do you draw the line, though?

Cody felt that Sabrina was out of his league from the moment he met her. Instead of letting her see him for who he is, he took the impress her with shiny things route. What happens if (when?) she gets distracted by the next man offering her more? Is he going to regret the money he invested in pursuing her?

I have met men like this before after they have been used by women who like to date men for sponsorship. They end up questioning the motives of every woman they meet after that. They also suddenly become a lot more selective about spending money on women to impress them.

What happens when you spend too much money dating? What kind of impact does that have? What is the most money you have spent on one date?

Do you think it is possible to date someone without blowing a lot of cash and still manage to impress them?

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

182 comments Add your comment

Alberta

March 1st, 2013
8:13 am

“Do you think it is possible to date someone without blowing a lot of cash and still manage to impress them?” Absolutely. The amount of money a guy has to spend “impressing” his date is directly proportional to how little self-confidence he has.

MissMoni

March 1st, 2013
8:34 am

GOOD Friday Morning MIA!!!

What happens when you spend too much money dating? Well if you are spending ABOVE your means, then you end up BROKE or another financial area goes lacking (unpaid).

Do you think it is possible to date someone without blowing a lot of cash and still manage to impress them? I absolutely think that it is possible. Although it may seem sweet to the female that he is lavishing her with only the “best”, it is so not sweet if he just can’t afford it. It’s just as nice to do what’s within your budget without breaking the bank. Use common sense people, it’s not that difficult. If your wallet says Ruby Tuesday’s then stick to that until your financial situation increases or you save up enough for a more expensive date. Going broke dating is just uncalled for. If a person really likes you, then they really like you.

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
8:46 am

Use common sense people, it’s not that difficult. If your wallet says Ruby Tuesday’s then stick to that until your financial situation increases or you save up enough for a more expensive date. Going broke dating is just uncalled for

MissMoni – I believe you summed it up quite nicely….NEXT topic please lol

And happy First Friday of March folks ;-)

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
8:54 am

Good Morning ladies….

I know the ladies are going to come in and say that the money and date spending does not matter, but coming from a real guy that dating in the real world, I gotta say that sentiment is only partially true…… The amount of loot one is willing to spend directly effects the amount of time and energy a woman is willing to invest in him. If you wallet is only and Applebees level, then you will never get more than Applebees invested in you. Now I am not talking about pyhsical investment, I am talking about her interest….. Long money will make every guy a star…..

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
8:58 am

Whiche explains why beatuiful women are throwing coochie at the likes of Little Wanye…..

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
9:10 am

If you’re going broke while dating, then you’re hanging out above your means trying to impress. There are a lot of places to take a date w/o breaking the bank.

Good morning.

MissMoni

March 1st, 2013
9:12 am

-SlimNu Good Morning & Happy 1st Friday of March to you as well!!!

-Courtside For the record, I am a beautiful woman and I don’t find Lil Wayne attractive and wouldn’t throw myself at him. Also, a woman (no matter what she looks like) if she’s ONLY interested in how much he can spend on her then that would qualify for the “Golddigger” category right??? Besides a guy can be a millionaire and still be a jerk.

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
9:16 am

MissMoni, I have no doubt that yo are STUNNING!!! and as a woman of quaility, also have no dought that you would not throw yourself and anyone (But I would be ok if you did at me :) ) But my staments were general, and as an activly dating guy, i can so for sure, that even for non golddiggers, if your money is long, your prospects go up…regardless af what you are looking for…..

disco

March 1st, 2013
9:18 am

good morning.

Alberta – I don’t think spending (to impress) and self confidence are necessarily linked. granted I understand that they can be but I don’t think that’s always the case.

courtside – hey. I wasn’t going to say it doesn’t matter. lol. still, I think you didn’t get it quite right. I don’t have a problem with applebee’s and if I’m with a man who can only afford applebee’s, that’s cool. now if dude has bank and is still acting like I’m only worth applebee’s to him, well that might be a little different.

slim – what you wanna talk about?

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
9:22 am

If you can’t comfortably spring for a burger, you might need to take yourself out of the game….all the way of of the game. No need in going on and on and on about getting creative…nuh uh. A grown man, by now in life, should be able to spring for a date, a nice date at that….IJS and LOL No on on here is early early early twenties. Yes, we’ve all made financials boo boos in the past, if not all most, if not most, some. Frankly, I can’t do it. I wanna go out and not worry about the tab and if the dude is going to experience a short fall or if he’ll turn to me…lol Again, if you cannot spring for a date, comfortably, stay home…PLEASE

I’m all for creative juices flowing, but for other reasons.

MissMoni

March 1st, 2013
9:24 am

-Courtside I get your point. “I ain’t saying she a golddigger, but she ain’t messing with a broke ni. . . .”

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:25 am

Good First Friday morning to ya! Do you think it is possible to date someone without blowing a lot of cash and still manage to impress them? Yes, that’s where you have to bring out your creative side. Surf the net and find deals for a plane tour around the city after a picnic in the park. Hire a chef from one of the local culinery school to prepare a meal in your home. The possibilites are endless. Just be creative.

The most I’ve seen a guy spend on a dinner date for us was @150.00 not including tip at Impreial Fez.

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
9:25 am

I ain’t saying she a golddigger, but she ain’t messing with a broke ni. . . .”

Ha Ha Ha…this is what Kevin the Kappa said to me….lolololol Nope, shole ain’t!! Don’t judge me.

I got a fire drill…BBL

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
9:25 am

MissMoni, There you go….. :) :) :)

disco

March 1st, 2013
9:28 am

button – huh??? your creative ideas sound like they require a bit of cash. lol. I can just see a dude who is gassing up his car $20 at a time looking online for a plane tour around town. lol.

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
9:29 am

Now on the other side of that, I have dropped as much as 12 hundred on a date before…..

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:35 am

disco – that’s why you have to surf the net and find deals.

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:37 am

no money no honey!

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
9:38 am

Courtside, if you don’t mind, can you break that date down for us, for me?. Sounds interesting.

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
9:39 am

disco – I really haven’t figured that out yet lol

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:41 am

If you’re broke there’s not need to date. that’s the reason you date to show the lady that you can provide for her. If he you can afford only the bear minimun then that’s how it’s going to be going forward. IF he can only take you to applebee’s then that’s all you most likely will be getting is applebee’s and the like.

MissMoni

March 1st, 2013
9:41 am

Leggs, I’m with you on this. . . I also want a breakdown of the $1200 date!!!

MsAtl

March 1st, 2013
9:43 am

Morning All!

Disco- I’m with you; to me it doesn’t matter how much money a man spends on a date, on the high end or the low end. I agree with your Applebee’s statement also.

Courtside- Lil Wayne? Ugh! Reminds me of the joke that money made Chris Rock handsome when he was playing the crackhead in New Jack City. I don’t judge a man by his bank account, I judge him by his character. That is not to say I am going to support him, just that the man is more important than his money.

MIA- I thought dating men for sponsorship was just a nice way of saying “prostition.” I do not believe a man should spend above his means or go broke trying to date a materialistic woman. He should just be honest about the situation. If all she cares about is how much he can lavish on her, then at some point she will realize he was fronting and bounce to the next one.

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
9:46 am

Button – I just went to Imperial Fez this past weekend. I like the atmosphere and the service but the food fell short for me. My palate is obviously not that diverse lol But out tab was $140 (tip included in that)

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
9:47 am

I hadn’t read the opening post…just the comments. Now that I’ve read it (and I how to how I feel), I think Cody is doing a disservice to himself. He should keep it real and lay it out there. If he can’t spring for dates, tell her. If she likes him, she’ll roll with him.

I still say grown folks that can’t spring for a burger should get out of the game. You cannot date without spending. It’s par for the course. You ain’t gotta go broke but you shole can’t date.

disco

March 1st, 2013
9:48 am

button – never mind. you obviously don’t get it. lol. look for deals. if you ain’t got it, you ain’t got it. the best deal in the world doesn’t matter if you ain’t got it. lol.

ms atl – sometimes chris rock doesn’t look too bad (sometimes. lol). my bigger issue with him is that he is just so freaking frail. talk about skin and bones.

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
9:49 am

My ex just told me a broke woman can get laid a lot quicker than a broke man. I could only laugh.

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
9:49 am

hold to how I feel

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
9:49 am

I’ve never went out with a guy for the very first time expecting a limo to pick me up, or to have $200+ dollars spent on dinner. I just do not want that kind of expectation before I know I even want to call or hear from yo ass again. lol Shole don’t need a bugaboo calling me after an expensive date tombout I owe him some more time for the money he spent. :lol:

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
9:51 am

Courtside ~ are you tallying up your bill?

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:54 am

SlimNu – I fell in love with that place, the waitress washed my hands and rubbed it with a sweet smelling oil. The food was pretty good too, I had the lamb dish. I love lamb.

disco – I got it….I figured you were being sarcastic that’s why I went there b/c I was referring to guy who got it! of course if you don’t got it then no deal in the world will work.

Button

March 1st, 2013
9:57 am

I forgot about Nikolai’s Roof, now that’s a dig deep in the pocket restaurant! I didn’t even want to know how much that tab was.

MsAtl

March 1st, 2013
9:58 am

Leggs- Do you dispute that statement?

Slim- I know, right? I don’t “owe” no man nothing for a dinner date. Those two things are mutually exclusive.

A girlfriend told me that she went to Red Lobster on a first date with a guy and he got upset because she ordered … lobster! He said it was too expensive. There was not a second date.

Hazel

March 1st, 2013
9:58 am

Happy Friday Folks!!

When I started dating my husband.. after about the 4th date ( at Dolce, about 6 years ago) , he told me that I needed to give him a break as he was making THAT kind of money as he was still in his residency. Well, needless to say… I oblidged and we hardly went out after that.
I did however pay for EVERYTHING on our first date as he said he forgot his wallet! Im glad I stuck around and belived him.

On the topic, yes I do think that one can impress someone without blowing cash. So many creative and fun things to do in atlanta.

Hazel

March 1st, 2013
9:59 am

*** He was NOT making that kind of money.. is what I meant to say

Hazel

March 1st, 2013
10:01 am

@ Celisea – “If you can’t comfortably spring for a burger, you might need to take yourself out of the game….all the way of of the game.”

Ok Ok, you are right. Those types of dates are actually the fun ones, I think.

DuShawn

March 1st, 2013
10:01 am

“……..that’s the reason you date to show the lady that you can provide for her – ” wow…..really?

Hazel

March 1st, 2013
10:02 am

Ms Atl – your last comment made me laugh. I dont blame your gf.

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
10:04 am

Button – I did dig the hand washing and all but the appetizers and ’salad’ was not that great to me. I opted for the chicken kabob and that was good though. After that, we went and smoked some hookah lol

daddy swiss

March 1st, 2013
10:04 am

@DuShawn — Yeah, I had to read that line twice, too.

Button

March 1st, 2013
10:05 am

I understand dating can get expensive, esp starting out when you’re footing the entire bill. But when things get to the point of you treating each other it evens out. Hopefully the woman can treat the guy to some nice places just as he had in the beginning.

Yes Dushawn that’s what I believe.

Button

March 1st, 2013
10:06 am

SlimNu – oh the hookah is the boom! I think mine was spiked…lol I had the tickles.

disco

March 1st, 2013
10:06 am

hazel – “no money” dates can be fun. “no money having men”. well that’s different. lol.

Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)

March 1st, 2013
10:07 am

Leggs, MissMoni,
I was on a lunch date with a lady and we were having a really good time…. Conversation was flowing easily and to be frank I was a bit bummed when I had to get back to work.. i told her I enjoyed her compnay and asked when I could see her again…. She told me I came up with something really special, she would make herself available that evening…. During our lunch, I found out that she was as big a Jazz fan as I, and when given a chance to go over the top, I did it……. I am a huge Najee fan and a guy that works for our company ( He lives in Ocala) mentioned that he was excited to go see Najee in Tampa . I called ticket master and purchased 2 seats ( Best avalable of course) Called Airtran and booked 2 seats, called her and asked her to Trust me for a wonderful evening and to wear something really nice….. She did and we took a trip….. GREAT NIGHT!!!! caght the show, had a late dinner at this little dive in Tampa. talked all night… came back the next day….$1200 hundred down, but It was well worth it……

MsAtl

March 1st, 2013
10:08 am

Courtside- That just earned you a positive nod! Very creative and special.

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
10:11 am

I’m digging all of that 10:07, except for “Airtran”, NO CAN DO….LOL I declare the wings flap when their planes take off.

We don’t have anything planned this weekends, most weekends we don’t, unless it’s with his boys (and their mates) or a couples thing like last weekend. The weekends I enjoy the best are those that AREN’T planned. We just sort of fly by the seat of our pants and do whatever we feel. Not every weekend but mosts. We don’t really worry about what other folks are doing and how much they’re spendng. We just do “us!!”
:mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Celisea

March 1st, 2013
10:12 am

Give me Delta…first and foremost, US Air next…but AirTran, ummm NOT!

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
10:12 am

MsAtl ~ not disputing at all, just interested enough to see a $1200 date tab from stem to stern.

Leggs

March 1st, 2013
10:15 am

That was very classy, Courtside. Now, I know you don’t know this about me, I own every Najee record.

SlimNu

March 1st, 2013
10:15 am

MsAtl – Where buddy should have taken her to a place that didn’t have lobster or anything of the sort on the menu! Maybe Buffalo Wild Wings would’ve been a better choice ;-) (matter of fact, that’s where beau and I went for our first meet up)