Best (worst) online dating profiles
A reader of our blog decided to give online dating a try. He is brand new to the whole process and wants to know what women notice as good, bad, or ugly. It’s been a hundred years since I’ve tried it, so I’m admittedly a tad rusty. Maybe you could give some tips to help the brave man?
I remember thinking that half the men on dating sites were likely married, living with a woman, or in federal prison. Sometimes these types get bored and starved for attention. Therefore, if there was no picture, I bypassed immediately. I don’t care how witty the profile was, either.
I think that trying to be too funny or verbose can come across kind of dull. You can’t be Seth McFarlane in a dating profile. Leave the comedy to the professionals, please. A sense of humor is great, though! Wait. I don’t think I’m helping much, here!
What are the best and worst online dating profiles you have seen?
What would make you take a closer look at one? Do women have to be virtually buttnaked and wearing heels to get a response? Do men have to flaunt their success and rave about wealth to keep a woman’s attention? (I know. Totally stereotyping genders – you get my point, though!)
Should you include pictures of your children?
Other than a boatload of patience (Carnival cruise, anyone?) and great internet connection, what will you absolutely need to manage online dating?
HAPPY FRIDAY!
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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127 comments Add your comment
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
10:54 am
Cel…if the women aint satisfied but they aint verbal about it,for whatever reason they offer their goods elsewhere, rather than cause a scene and confrontatio nwith that fat hubby.
Mmeello – Honestly, I can’t even speak to this or this mentality. I don’t date fat dudes….trrrrrrust me on that. And I’m not fat….trrrrust me on that as well
disco
February 15th, 2013
11:01 am
ex – in general, I don’t help dudes out. if you have something to say then you need to be prepared to bring it. now, if I’m checking some dude and he ain’t checking me (fast enough – lol) that’s when I sashay my little behind across the room and get up in his face. difference between me and the average dude is that when I get in old boy’s face I know what I’m going to say and it’s not the first crazy that pops in my head.
Exiled!
February 15th, 2013
11:14 am
@Disco..if I’m checking some dude ….u seem kinda aggressive tho, so u better watch out
I am all for chic checking dude but please dont eye ball dude so glaringly the same way us dudes wil undress some bootey pimped,leggy ,pretty chic ,some times.
If im checking u and u are checkking me and all u do is coyily make urself available for me to step without making it obvious,then thats cool
I will frown on a chic that checks me,eyeballs me glaringly with the come_get me look or worse, eye ball me while zero her eyes on the Ding_Dong package.
….some of it is so obvious…
Unless I am really starving sexually, I aint gon to holla!
Lady~Sunshine~
February 15th, 2013
11:15 am
Really C?!? Girl I’ve been in the wind but FINALLY slowing it down~ gotta hang soon and catch up! I am serious this time lol I am open lol hahahaha
disco
February 15th, 2013
11:18 am
ex – I am somewhat aggressive but then let me tell it most dudes are a little bit punkish. yeah almost all talk a good game but most aren’t on their game. I’m not necessarily mean when rejecting guys. I appreciate that they stepped to me. I just expect them to step to me with something. don’t expect me to give them a gold star just because they are in my face talking about “hey girl. what yo name is” (had that happen before). as for being aggressive, I know plenty of chicks on that “the man is supposed to approach” tip. I respect that but I don’t see anything wrong with stepping to a man, introducing yourself and striking up conversation. sometimes a closed mouth don’t get fed and if you snooze, you lose.
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
11:19 am
Ex, tsk tsk tsk. Not necessarily at you, but you chomping all the same things we don’t like you guys to do. That’s rich!
disco
February 15th, 2013
11:19 am
ex – oh and I didn’t miss that coyly make yourself available. that’s the game to be played by the chicks that want the man to approach them. me, personally, if I have to set it up for you then I’m helping you too much. man up and handle yours. ya feel me? lol.
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
11:25 am
Lady – Okay. Imma check in when I’m back in the building.
M Kerry
February 15th, 2013
11:36 am
Saw a show earlier this week about online dating. It has grown from a $40 million industry 15 years ago to a $4 BILLION industry in terms of annual revenues. They use complex algorithms designed to match anything and everything from your hand lines to facial expressions to determining your match based on your favorite colors, etc, etc. etc. Anytime an industry generates that much revenue – and keep growing – it attracts everyone and their grandmother in an effort to get a slice of the pie.
Our parents never needed such complex matching algorithms and yet, that generation had far longe rmarriages than our generation does. Funny how that works… :=)
For Real
February 15th, 2013
11:39 am
What up blog Fam!
On topic: Internet dating is not for me. People tend to feel empowered behind a keyboard.
Disco: What do you say to a dude you checking for?
kimmie
February 15th, 2013
11:40 am
What’s up gang?!!
Nothing to offer on the topic
Leggs/Celisea/Disco/others that watch it – Okay whachall think about Scandal last night? I feel sorry for David, I really like him!! I think Olivia should hire him! That FL is a lying beyotch!! That was a big surprise at that christening – wasn’t expecting that little brown baby, but it ended up being the other couple!LOL!! Somebody on another blog said even though it was supposed to be 3 months later, America’s baby looked about 30!LOL!!
For Real
February 15th, 2013
11:44 am
Mkerry: I don’t think you can compare the reason one generation got, stayed and/or divorce from marriage to another generation. Reasons and conditions for marriage are constantly changing… And I don’t know how old you are but your parents marriage rate is probably pretty low unless you are 65 years old.
Dirty Birds ( RISING-UP)
February 15th, 2013
11:49 am
Online dating is another vehicle to meet a person who may have similiar interest if they are being honest. Although, I have never participated in online dating, there benefits to online dating for those who are busy and do not have time go out and meet folks or those folks who are shy and a have more courage behind the keyboard.
Happy Valentine’s day BluzGirl!!
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
11:51 am
kimmie ~ I feel sorry for David too, but I don’t think he has the guile just yet to join Olivia’s team. He hasn’t hit the bottom yet. The FL is truly an ….itch. A lot of alcohol shown last night. Fritz is losing/has lost control.
disco
February 15th, 2013
11:54 am
M Kerry – there are so many variables at play re marriages/relationships of yesteryear. and even all of them didn’t last.
for real – depends on the situation. where I am, how I’m dressed, what’s going on around us. trust me, I work out a plan in my head though before I make my approach.
kimmie – I thought it said 10 months later but I’d had a couple of drinks so don’t trust me. I think david would make a good member of the team but frankly if I were him I wouldn’t eff with Olivia.
For Real
February 15th, 2013
11:59 am
Hey Kimmie you know Archer is back on.
Disco: Can I get a sample of past approach lines you have used?
I don’t understand how someone can be too busy to meet someone but will have enough time to date.
Hazel
February 15th, 2013
12:07 pm
@ Celisia – phew. ok. i just had to make sure i got you ok. Speaking of creepy.. I did have a date with a guy that was MUCH older then his pic and (never saw him again) on top, saw him at this event with his wife and teenage daugther.. Whoa. So you are right too.
disco
February 15th, 2013
12:09 pm
for real – you are trying to make me think too hard. I’m in retirement remember? lol. haven’t been at it in a while. I think my last approach was last may when I was checking for a tall, chocolate brother dressed in white at the spot when I was in nashville. his boy introduced us and everything and dude just went on about his business like I wasn’t nobody. I sat right there and developed my plan, waited til he was alone (he seemed to be quite popular) and went in for the kill. he’s tall, I’m short so I had to do that tap and ask a brother to lean down move. i don’t even recall what I said. maybe something about it being his bday (I got that during the introduction) or maybe I said something about the band. I really don’t remember). he then turned super chatty (go figure) at which point I suggested we go find a quiet corner to sit in. we sat in that quiet corner almost til closing time. turns out he had some dealbreaker issues but we still speak from time to time.
another time, some years ago, again at a club, I was eyeballing another tall, sexy thing from across the room. he was with two friends. I got up from the table and told my girls “watch me work”. they all laughed talking about girl you crazy. I went up to the group. greeted all of them, told them I didn’t want to interrupt and told the one I was checking for where I was sitting and where I would be when he was ready to come and get me to dance with him. I went back to my table. my girls were like what. I was like just wait. sure enough. old boy came over. that was that. turns out this guy lived a couple of hours away. we still “kicked it” for a little while though. every now and again I wish I wasn’t so quick to delete phone numbers. lol.
Hazel
February 15th, 2013
12:11 pm
I tell my bestfriend to start the online thing as she has yet to find anyone decent on her own in atl..
@ For real – “I don’t understand how someone can be too busy to meet someone but will have enough time to date”
I think a good example would be going out to potentially meet someone ( one may not have time for that) but with online dating, you can shoot an email while at work, a text, maybe even a phone convo on the drive back home etc.. Then if you like…you can date that person. Thats what I think.
Dirty Birds ( RISING-UP)
February 15th, 2013
12:14 pm
Damm,Damm now I am going to have to take down my shirtless online picture…lol
When I get to 50yrs old I still want fine,phatt, and under 40 yrs old. YEAH!!!!
Exiled!
February 15th, 2013
12:24 pm
every now and again I wish I wasn’t so quick to delete phone numbers. lol.
@Disco…thats whats up, realest of u?
itchy cob-webs are a mufgga!
disco
February 15th, 2013
12:27 pm
for real – just flashed back on a dude I was crushing on in texas forever ever (well like 2 years). I liked him and one of my girls was checking for his boy. when I did finally decide it was time to get a piece of that I straight told him to cancel whatever chick he had lined up for that night because I was coming with him. his eyes got a little big, I’m sure he was surprised but I went home with him that night and another night and another night. lol. well, you get the picture. heard he got married a few years ago. that’s too bad because I was in texas recently and most def would have hollered. oh well.
kimmie
February 15th, 2013
12:28 pm
For Real – Yeah we dvr it and watch on the weekends. Still loving it!LOL!!
Bluzgirl
February 15th, 2013
12:29 pm
What up Dirty?!?!
kimmie
February 15th, 2013
12:31 pm
Disco – I had a little spirits too, so it may have been 10!LOL!!!
That new dude Olivia “accidentally” bumped into at the coffee shop is a real snake too, with his cameras all up in her house!!
disco
February 15th, 2013
12:36 pm
since we back on Olivia I wish she would stop playing the fool. it’s one thing to be all up on fitz when she’s feeling him and he’s feeling her but after he straight played her like he did she should have got her “eff that MF” on and let him kick rocks. you don’t do me that dirty and then still screw me in a closet. the whole thing makes me angry. I’m sure some think it’s sexy or even romantic but I think she’s a daggone fool.
kimmie
February 15th, 2013
12:45 pm
disco – I’m pissed about that ish too, cause he could put his hands on me!! That was her way “out” of that situation. It’s easier to get over someone when they’ve done you dirty! He & that beyotch FL could have each other!
I HOPE she’s on her game with that new dude!!
kimmie
February 15th, 2013
12:46 pm
Could NOT put his hands on me!!
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
12:50 pm
disco ~ I have to side with you on that one. Olivia is looking weaker and weaker to me. I like her, and love her wardrobe, but come on. How you going to let this man use you. Unforbidden love can yield some of the hottest sex, but no matter how you slice it, you still a side piece!
disco
February 15th, 2013
12:58 pm
leggs – and I ain’t even knocking side piece if you are getting yours but from my viewpoint it doesn’t look like she’s getting anything but freaking played. you talked about david hitting rock bottom, heck, Olivia might get there first. she’s been on an emotional dive for a minute. she ain’t no gladiator. she just a regular chick with a good talk game but she ain’t no gladiator. lol. well maybe she can be but she’s got to man up. lol.
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
1:23 pm
I’m not knocking side piece if that’s what you want. She doesn’t want that, but is going along so she doesn’t lose him completely? That’s what I don’t like. Don’t settle/lose yourself for that which you don’t want just to make him happy.
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:24 pm
Lady – Girl I’ve been in the wind but FINALLY slowing it down~ gotta hang soon and catch up!
Lady, I have your text and we are good for Monday!!
Kimmie – I didn’t get to see Scandal. I didn’t DVR it either….pooh
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:24 pm
Don’t tell me Olivia don’t gone and got hit with the dumb rubber brick (or something like that).
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:25 pm
DONE gone and got hit…not “don’t gone and got hit”….my baaaad
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
1:26 pm
Yep, Olivia might hit bottom first. From day one, I told everyone to keep an eye on the FL.
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:26 pm
I’m getting Scandal tidbit updates online…yaaaah!
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:27 pm
Olivia might hit bottom first.
Oh, Lawd
Let me get “read up” and see what’s up
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:28 pm
So online dating fizzled huh? Alright, getting on the grind
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
1:36 pm
Can it get any worse, the Carnival cruise makes it to Alabama. Some passengers load onto a bus. En route, it breaks down in the middle of the highway. Had to pull down all their luggage and wait for a replacement bus.
SlimNu
February 15th, 2013
1:36 pm
sigh
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
1:39 pm
SlimNu
February 15th, 2013
1:44 pm
Leggs – OMG, That’s what you call a great FML moment (fugg my life)!! I’m sure those folks are sooo over the whole vacation deal at this point. We were discussing this in the office today and I wonder if they’ll be a class action law suit filed. Because $500 and a free cruise is a drop in the bucket for the conditions they had to endure
Leggs
February 15th, 2013
1:47 pm
Unfortunately, it would probably sour me on ever taking another cruise. All that body of water already frightens me so to endure something like that, put a fork in me, I’m done!
Exiled!
February 15th, 2013
1:49 pm
the Carnival cruise makes it to Alabama. Some passengers load onto a bus. En route, it breaks do
@Cel…the mistake right there was to go thru Ala_Bamas!!…
how u gonna have Bamas in ur plans when u have been traumitised like that thus far?
Dirty Bird (Rising Up)
February 15th, 2013
1:51 pm
@BluzGirl….Nothing is up,I just wanted to wish you V-day again because you deserve something special. You are good peeps!
Celisea dude is putting it down, she cannot stop posting, talking….lol…I like that Celisea, you are showing how exciting and positive what a good relationship will do for you.
Disco has mad game a tip of the hat to you playa!
Carnival is the absolute worst cruise line.
It raining meteors is Russia, the place with no limit religion…. IJS..
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
1:59 pm
Mmeello – That wasn’t me that comment on the cruise mishap..lol I still have Bamahas in the plans, just not going by way of water. Shoot, I’m deathly afraid of being in all that water? You ever just sat and looked at a globe?? We are sitting in water.
Remember the creation….water was everywhere. God divided and placed us here. Shoot, just think if he turns everything aloose what it would be like…. Water above us and water beneath use. Nooooo buddy, I ain’t doing a cruise…ever!!! I can do the beach but I got control over how far I’m going…lol
Dirty – You just made me laugh out loud, and I mean loud. Keep on and you might just be alright with me. I can’t say that too quick. I have an apparent enemy that lurks. But, 2013 is a good year, I ain’t doing, buying or feeding into bullcrappery. So if you do turn on, I’m just gon put the igg on you
Bluzgirl
February 15th, 2013
2:02 pm
Dirty – Well…happy day after VDay to you again!
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
2:03 pm
commented and Bahamas….
I was laughing too hard at Dirty….lololol
Celisea
February 15th, 2013
2:06 pm
They’re getting the butter from the duck today….gheesh I’m doing good to stick my head in here…
disco
February 15th, 2013
2:22 pm
LOL. and me? I love cruising. hoping this little mishap will bring prices down. I’ll be on the lookout for my next cruise soon. C – yep. it is a lot of water but I think standing on deck looking out at all that water and seeing 2, 3, 4 other cruise ships off in the distance was a very humbling experience. you just think there’s X thousand on each ship and there’s plenty of room out here for everybody.