Happy Valantimes for Lovers!
Happy :eyeroll: day for the Non Lovers!

On topic:

Half truths and Omissions are common and to be expected even when u like her/him that much because you just cannot disclose 1hundred when the relationship is in it’s early stages.

Drip,drip,drip,drip in small details,is how you feed her your history and some of the intimate trufs about your life.

Remember,everyone,men and women go in,putting their best foot forward. The sordid,smelly and croocked past is wrapped tightly wound and concealed while you work on her/his pshyic,convincing thru some mental hallucination of love,passion and desire.
And ofcourse some women will put on some naked show,making the man purr, humpfff and moanfully groan(like Rick Ross), in an acknowledgement of physical sexual delight.

When the fogg of love and lust finally wears off,and her sordid and beyeotch past drips drips out,you are her Biggest defender!

That’s a winning strategy.

Happy valentines Day folks!

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I do not understand the need to outright lie…. I owe you nothing so I give it to you strait with no chaser,,,That being said, some things are just not your damn business…. Call it omission if you like or attach whatever lable you choose, but no one needs to know all of my details and depending on the nature of the question, you might get called out for asking……

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good morning.

ex – I like that. eyeroll day. good one.

s/h – I’m with you. don’t come at me with all kinds of questions that don’t concern you and I won’t have to tell you to mind your business and stop worrying about stuff that doesn’t concern you. in short, I’m not likely to lie when questioned. I’m likely to tell you to shut the eff up and get out of my face. lol.

now do I lie? yep, but if you ask me everyone lies. it might be a big lie, a little lie, a polite lie, a trivial lie. folks lie. it is what it is. heck, most people lie to themselves at some point. if you can lie to yourself you know you can lie to others.

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Diva, tell your friend Sean, he’s not ready. lol

That mindset alone is a set-up for failure. I don’t have to lie and I won’t lie. On the flip side, IMO, I don’t think it’s necessary to get offended, stern or adamant if someone does asks questions about things they want to know. Many many folks live under the “don’t ask don’t tell”, or “she didn’t ask, so I didn’t volunteer”, shoot you better be asking…lololol IMO, asking comes with the natural in the progression of things. Now, it may not be the right time to answer, but that’s easy. Simply say so. It’s a person’s peragotive to disclose or not. Neither way is wrong…unless you’re hiding your third wife and never divorced your second one…lololol…I kid I kid. Really, if you’re not ready, no need to lie, just make it known that it’s not time or you’re not “there” yet.

Nothing EVER good comes from lying or is there justification to lie.

As the good book says, “the truth shall set you free.” Now if the good Lord places emphasis on, and let’s me know telling the truth is the way to go, no way I’m going to refute that

Anyhoo, it’s gonna be a fantab day! Gotta get coffee.

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nor is there…….. not or is there

Dern, I need coffee REAL bad

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disco, did you see the Seinfield episode with the ugly baby (LOL) yea that’s a good time to die.

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Disco…at my other job there was this lady that is always upbeat….’Its a good day!’ said with gutso and firmness,according to her. And she expects everybody to respond that way when probed for the ceremonial and meaningless ‘good morning’ response.

One morning I was really off,feeling real awful for some reason and we meet in the breakroom as I was filling up my gazzlionth round of coffee.

‘good morning!!’ ,with ummpf,she prodes me.

I looked at her with a lazy eye and said ‘hie’

‘you are supposed to respond with blah blah..’.she goes off,imploring me to respond with Energy.

My top went off! Pop!! Damn I was mad and I went off on that lady…

For a cpple of months..she wld not talk to me..

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disco – Take your example of the “awwww, what a cute baby”, I see babies all the time that ain’t came into their own yet, I say, “s/he is soooo precious”, and I say that in sincerity.

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Let me tell you, I’m not lying when I say “I say good morning” with a smile. It took me years for to change my outlook and how I felt about things and people and eventually, I learned how to do it. It’s second nature to me.

Too bubbly today? lolololol

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Faking is another form of lying. For the fakers around me, they get a good morning with a smile, cause I’m the bigger person but THAT’S ALL!!! LOLOL I ACT OUT THE TRUTH, by not playing, joking, shooting the breeze….NONE OF THAT!! I can SHOW them better than being on the spot to tell them, “I think you’re fake.” lololol It’s funny too, cause I got this down to a science and it’s even more funny that they ALWAYS seem to get the picture. We got a few folks around here that get that treatment from me…lolololol That way, you stay clear and free of mess, of accusations and folks saying stuff you didn’t say. If I don’t say it, you can’t repeat. You gotta be REEEEEAL smart around folks.

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disco – yeah. always trying to get in a dig.

Why am I not surprised? lololol Zingers and digs and stuff along this line can tetter either way…IMO

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Cel..u say ‘good norning’ to those other folks u don’t like that much in the office?

Or u like eeeerrrbody?

u remember u have said u and ex were into some sexual debauchery untill u didn’t feel good bout it….Now if u and current were just lounging around at the crib upstairs and in a moment of discourse,he calmly asks u if u have ever did such and such,which u did in ur past,wld u be so open to saying Yes?….without wanting to not to jeorpadize ur current good place.

Never mind what u think he wld or wld not do after hearing the truf.

There mum…lemmme hear!

Happy valentine’s day by the way.

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Mmello – I speak to everybody (at least in passing). I mean I don’t walk around looking for folks to speak. I do it because it’s polite and and it displays manners and it’s free. It takes no effort. Now, anything outside of that to the fakers, not happening. Nope. I’d be lying to put up a facade. Get it? “I’d be lying” I’m on a roll today

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disco – We agree on speaking. Now, I’m bad with “how are you”…lol So, that’s where we differ. But in all honesty, I’m looking for “I’m well, thank you.” Well, they are. If you ain’t dies and crossed over, in spite of aches, pain, broke, busted, you still living….right?

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disco – some folks deserve those subtle digs. I wish I could go at them full on. fix a few little red wagons

LOLOLOLOLOL….stoooooop

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celisea – I think about making the mistake (lol) of asking my grandmother or certain elderly folks in general how they are. girl they will tell you about their ailments, their doctor’s appointments, their medications, their bowel movements and on and on an on. no pun intended but “how you doing” can be a loaded question. I generally don’t ask it unless I really care just in case I get the truth. lol.

my son’s general response to how you doing is – “I ain’t locked up”. lol.

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If the baby is just damn Ugly I ain’t saying none!

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are you a convicted felon?

do you do illegal drugs?

are you now or have you ever been a chain smoker and/or alcoholic?

do you have baby mommas/daddys?

are you on doctor-prescribed psychotropic meds?

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Happy Love Day everyone.

Love Actually =I love you even when you’re sick and look disgusting.

On topic…….What about white lies?
In the beginning, I guess its ok. But as the relationship starts getting serious, one needs to be 100% devoted to the person.

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do those jeans make you look fat, nah it aint the jeans (LOL)

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Morning All!
Diva- Sean needs to wait to date until his mindset changes.
I believe in honesty in relationships. If there is a question I don’t like, I would prefer to tell you I am not answering certain things, but I am not going to make ish up. You do not need to know my life from the Magna Carta forward.
Single- I like your list, but there are a few more in my “survey.”
Celisea- That is usually my response too; she is so precious (which is not a lie). Now, if the ugly baby is yours, just acknowledge it, dress it cute and keep it moving, lol.
When I am asked how are you and all is not fine, I will say “I am well,” which is true; I may not be happy at that particular time, but I am healthy and therefore I am well.
That is not to say I never lie (that would be a lie)- I just believe a relationship should be based on honesty.

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disco – Your son’s response is along the lines of what I’m expecting.

I’m well
I’m alive
I’m living
I’m making it
I ain’t locked up
I’m good

etc etc etc

MsAtl – Right. Babies are just the outcome of that process. No point in hitting them (indirectly) with that. Just compliment their preciousness and K.I.M.

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C and ms atl – but y’all both have to be aware that “precious” can be southern belle code? shoot, precious can almost be an insult. along with special. I am definitely guilty of saying “so and so is special”. I may be joking or clowning when I say it but I know I don’t mean special in a good way.

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C – in my mind all those are pretty much lumped together. oh well.

btw – I heard them on steve Harvey this morning talking about the difference between strange looking and ugly. I thought that topic had the potential to be entertaining but I changed channels. anyone hear where they went with that?

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Lady – If you’re reading….WE MISS YOU!!!

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Connotative special

One thing with me is I wont lie if I don’t like it and I won’t endorse your opinion if o do not feel the same way bout it..

‘Does this fit on me or how do u like this’…that’s Queen,trying different dress outfits.

I just tell her how Iam feeling.

Sometimes she will just dismiss me,’you don’t know fadhion’ coz she also has a fad fetish,sometimes dressing up the way that seems trendy.

But for me,if it don’t fit,it just don’t,why lie!?

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disco, I’ve known folks to use precious in a sarcastic way, do it all the time

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(waving) Hey Stamps!

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s/h – I don’t know if it’s always meant that way or not but that’s usually how I take it. lol.

ITL – I just trembled a bit. all those little southern belle-isms will keep a chick on edge. now those heffas had phoney down to a science. it was passed down from generation to generation. lol.

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LOL@disco. Sorry, I couldn’t resist when you said you were a yankee.

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hola, leggs! miss ya

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LOL @ disco @ 9:40

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still I appreciate the up north way of simply telling it like it is. this down south way of sugar coating everything isn’t for me

In all seriousness, I prefer that folks be straightforward and to the point. The problem is that there is a fine line between straightforward and rude. I often find northerners to be a little TOO blunt in their delivery. *shrugs*

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Disco- I am a yankee also.
No need to lie, either i will tell you or i won’t.

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Disco- The first time I was called a yankee was when I moved to S.C. and went into the gas station. As soon as I began talking, someone said “you onea dem dang yankees, aintcha”? It took me a second because I had to make sure they weren’t fighting words, lol.

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Disco, i know that was a rhetorical question about holding a grudge? (LOL)

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s/h – how many times did you see me type “I wonder”. rhetorical or not, sometimes I wonder.

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O/T Head shaker….

Highest grossing sales perrson In our region just got suspended for 10 day without pay for walking around the office with a Jar of Marichino cherries offering to to V-Day tricks with the stems…….

Dumbazz Boy!!!!

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Well disco, I don’t wonder, I know a lot of them still do.

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@Court: Not the old “tie a knot in the stem” trick.

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Dang Court!LOL!!

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All he needs is a dark alley and a trench coat!

…..and a van with tinted windows. CREEPY!

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@cz: I hope it was an accident. But early reports aren’t in his favor – she was shot four times, there had been “domestic incidents” at the house before, and there are eye- (or I guess ear-) witnesses who heard the whole thing.

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i thought it was kinda janky that he had armed guards at his home but thought a prowler somehow made it past the guards and through the door just like that. i mean, she didn’t come bustin in thru a window so …. (smh).

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random – am I kind of wrong to be considering skipping work just to hit the sale at ikea? lol. I’ve been needing some new duvet covers and they will have them on sale Monday. I know by the time I get off work they will be gone or picked over. decisions, decisions.

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What’s wrong with being a Yankee! Most shoot straight from the hip.

And with some of them, that’s the way I feel after an interaction – like I’ve been shot, or at least shot at. I’m not a sugarcoater, per se, but I’m not going to be blunt and rude, either.

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Can you believe I’ve never been to Ikea?!?! Maybe I’ll go Monday since I don’t have to work!

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ITL ~ I understand how you feel. We often dull down our bite for those thin skinned. However, if a thin skinned person feel like “bucking” buckshot coming there way (if that’s the situation we find ourselves in).

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D – trust. I’m not getting all grand. I am a fan of down. I have down feather beds and down comforters. I like to keep the comforters covered hence the need for duvets and every now and again you have to change things up. my son has been out of my house for 5+ years and I still refer to the room as “his room”. folks be like why don’t you say guest room. I can’t. to me guest room sounds all pretentious. I didn’t grow up in a house with a guest room.

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disco – I HATE Ikea….lololol The comforters any good? I need about 4 new sets for my new bed There’s an Ikea near me. I could run in there on my way home.

You know what, I shouldn’t say I hate Ikea, because I’ve never even stepped one foot in there. My sister though, has purchased and everything looked cheap. Not only that, but that stuff just fell apart.

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BTW, shooting straight from hip doesn’t necessarily mean “being mean and rude.” Blunt, perhaps, but not mean and rude.

Chile, I so cosign. I just live and let live. Can’t worry about coddling folks and how they’re gonna take stuff. I think as long as a person is saying the right thing, with the right intentions, nothing else should matter too much.

Can’t we all just get along? lololololololol

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All this talk of shopping, I might have to hit the mall on my lunch break. Or Tuesday Morning. I haven’t been there in FOREVER.

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“……I have down feather beds and down comforters”……Did I misread that or was that an invitation?

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I’m waiting on disco. I got bonus money

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If it’s something he wants to try, I’d much much rather he just put the moves on me

Celisea…actually, that wld be a good come back on your part coz, like u say, u dont know why hes asking, so,rather than trying to deflect(or lie) or even start an argument…..”why u asking me that..(yelling)” u wld rather just move towards him…in a sexxy knda way…and just respond back,” so Darlin, u wanna put that move on me”..

Just make sure u make it look like he is the champ and Inventor of the move!

otherwise its not gon end there after he enjoys your expertise…the next question is gon be…

Who taught u that!?

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Mmeello – Just make sure u make it look like he is the champ and Inventor of the move!

I agree with all of your 11:41 especially that “who taught you that” question….lol We know how men can be in that department. To the copy and pasted I just bolded, I almost said (when I initially responded), that I would just “act” like he came out of the box with it. You are spot on my man…lol

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celisea – funny I am not an ikea groupie like a lot of folks I know. I do go there from time to time just to walk around. I’ve bought a few sets of drapes there and not much else. I haven’t tried their duvets or comforters but for $10 I’m willing to try them.

ms atl – I too say hot dogs. and I say pop instead of soda.

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My mom’s caretaker and a couple of other elderly ladies in her group, will have a day trip to Ikea. They look around, squat awhile and grab lunch. My mama LOVES it.

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ITL…northerners border on rudeness coz for most, unless they work in the finasncial district,the life aint grand!

Northerners experience the cold and the little money but taxes are high and theior money dont go far,cost of living is waaaay expeensive…its just a hustle…

Let alone living in match boxe houses and high rise box apartments that birds rather envy! and paying thru the nose for rent..not even mortgage.

No wonder they are kinda rude….

Its pityful

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Y’all, I have been racking my brain this morning. I keep my account balanced to the penny or most times, I keep a mental tab going of what I spent and deducting from the balance as I go (keeping receipts and stuff), but I’m off this morning by about $700 There’s more in there than I expected but I don’t see any incoming credits other than what I was expecting I’ve gone over it a gazillion times, so now? I’m about to move most of that balance to a different account I’m saving money in that account.

Just something I’ve been pondering over since about 7:00

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disco – Nuh uh…lololol Okay, for a guest bedroom okay, but main beds and bedrooms, nuh uh. I say that cause you’re gonna be spending $10 a million times to a good 80.00 plus comforter set. And I just tossed out $80.00 Shoot, you catch Macy’s at a good time, you can get them bad boys (and the whole set) for the low low…as low as $39.99 sometimes.

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I believe in respecting you until you give me a reason not to

co-sign.

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Alright folks, I got a call at 1:00 so I need to grab lunch.

disco – Let me know if you skip work and if it was worth it, if any good bargins.

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Cel…its mid month and u balling!

I got 35$ in mine..

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“northerners border on rudeness coz for most, unless they work in the finasncial district,the life aint grand! – What a silly, blanket statement. Working in the financial district would seem to make many northerners more rude than other professions. Are you kidding me??? Stress is stress, but not working in the financial district definitely doesn’t say one’s life isn’t grand. Good gosh o mighty….

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disco – Gotcha. Well, check out Macy’s sales, cause they have greeeeat prices for comforter sets during that time. Marshalls/TJMaxx have pretty good priced sets as well. Shoot, a comforter set can get dang expensive. I ain’t dropping $200 or $300 for one. Nuh uh…lol

Mmeello – Stop….lol This one stumped me. I didn’t post that to brag or anything, but this place is my “twitter”, so I tossed it out there….lololol

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My sister, bless her heart, said take it for what it is…lololol

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NO, I meant the grand part….life is hard for most..general blanket statement but true..the rudeness is like Osmosis..once u live there and experience the rudeness from taxi folks, general folks on the streets, even if u have it, u become obnoxious as well with time…

U think The Donald is rude coz he dont have it or he just hapened to live in a city of obnoxious people…

I was up there last year,New york ..new jersey, Connectcut….I dont even know why the average joe blow pumps up Brooklyn coz its pitful sight up there,looking at where they live….

That gottra make an average person feel miserable and just rude and unkind coz there have to do so much just to make it.

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Celisea ~ I thought to do that. I want new ones, but know it’s not really in the budget. Repainting isn’t a bad idea.

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Perceptions of northern rudeness vary per location. Philly, yeah, pretty rough; NYC, sure. But Staten Island is a nice place full of nice people. Jersey Shore is nice, nice folks (I never watched the show of imbeciles by the same name). Other towns in PA, Ohio, WI, MI, mostly nice folks, especially away from cities. Shoot, most of GA considers Atlanta to be the southern center of rudeness. I guess it’s relative.

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Get this…the courier who comes into our office every day is very loud and talkative. How about he comes to my office and says “What? You don’t have anything? It’s Valentine’s Day.” I gave him a funny look and said “I don’t have anyone and really don’t care about it…” Seriously? You gonna make it loud and point me out? Sheesh!!! LOL

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Leggs, if you want to see pics of some he’s done, let me know. Absolutely gorgeous.

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disco ~ not quite pub height, but taller than your average dining table. I look over to the spot and visualize it. I’ll know it when I’ll see it and feel…yeah, that’s the table!

MsAt; ~ I’m hollering over here. That was FUNNY! Thanks for the laugh. I definitely understand (rofl). Always, always sneakers!!! I can’t even imagine going in closet to get my tennis shoes (lol). I have a friend who gets on me every time I say I’m going “food” shopping. She doesn’t understand why I don’t say “grocery” shopping. Simple, I didn’t grow up saying it that way.

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MsAtl – We said “tennis shoes” growing up. I say sneakers most of the time now.

Let me go get lunch before the time slips away.

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Celisea- Did you twist your lip when you said “mmmmm hmmmm?” Lol
Disco- That is too funny. I bet next time she will be more specific.
Leggs- I say food shopping also. Some of my friends say they are going to “make groceries.” What???

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ms atl – I have to ask. where are those friends from? you just saw my post right? lol.

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why do Northerners not get nice when they have lived in the kind south for a long time?

do they remain rude to maintan a facade?

u Disco?

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Leggs – Okay, he’s gonna send them to my phone.

MsAtl – That was funny. I’m not conscious but I probably did twist my lips….lol

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Generally, I’m a nice person (so I’ve been told), but come at me wrong, I can go toe to toe.

I hear you Leggs!! Gotta let ‘em know sometimes..

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Coming back up from the cafe, I saw a chick that works on the floor where there’s a gang of folks (mostly women). I can just see folks now. It was a nice arrangement I must say. If there any group that does show and tell, it’s definitely that entire floor.

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“but do u realise that Not having a vDay partner urwself tends to put a dark cloud and damper on ur own mood and feelings” – you’re on a roll w/ur blanket statements today.

Definitely not true. Everyone not involved in a relationship is in a dour mood. It’s simply Thursday to them (lol).

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ex – naw. I don’t think that’s me reflecting my single-ness. I won’t say it’s inappropriate I’ll just say I don’t get it. coupled up or not I wouldn’t walk around wishing folks a happy valentine’s day. I’d be more likely not to acknowledge it at all. after all, it’s a personal holiday more so than a general holiday. I could see a co-worker on the phone wishing their S/O a happy vday but a client? naw. I’m not feeling that one.

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I’m with you, disco. My neighbor’s husband text me with a Happy Vday wish. I know it wasn’t just too me, but it’s still weird.

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Bday is a couple’s holiday, not a general holiday. Yes ma’am.

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Dirty – Happy V Day to you too!

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misery loves company…?

that seems,to me at least, buttress what im saying….u happy,move with happy people

u married, befriend married folks….

single folks, maybe unhappy themselves, looking at married folks doing their thing put an unhappy cynic spin on what, to married folks looks like happy play…happy valentines day..

thats what misery loves company means there….

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It has been weird having customers tell me Happy VDay…I say it back, but it’s not really something I think should be said to random people…

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There is a chick in my office that is miserable and she purposely wore black today so she could BAH HUMBUG all day long. This is the same chick that tried to convince another co-worker to leave her hubby and allow her to move in with her so they could start going out together. lol

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Slim…that was me last year, but I had just gone through a rough breakup…this year…it’s just another day! I’m actually proud of myself for not being bummed today!

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This is the same chick that tried to convince another co-worker to leave her hubby and allow her to move in with her so they could start going out together. lol

@Slim..misery loves company…ALL Day!

wearing black on Vday???

now thats extreme…….even Disco would not go there!

Is it a funreal really?

LOL

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I tell y’all, there are the pros and cons to being in a “self starter” role, where your managers is miles away and you can pretty much come and go as you please. You better be dern straight that you’re accountable for EVERYTHING.

There is soooo much information downstreamed to us as a team and it’s almost information overload. And trust me, my manager will call you on it and give you a handslap if you can’t answer or don’t sound like you know what you’re talking about. This company is so big, most time looking for polices and stuff is sometimes like looking for a needle in a haystack. Most times though, for the job, you need to have the policies handy. Pros and cons folks, pros and cons. Right now, listening, I’m feeling all cons….lololololol

It’s all good, I’m grateful to have a job

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Bluz – Maybe that’s why that’s her this year because her and her hubby have been separated for quite some time and now she’s close to losing her house.

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Okay, back to listening. I can’t afford to miss NATHEN (nothing)!!!! I need to be in the know.

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Hahahaha…just had a coworker to IM me, asking for clarification and said she hated to ask because she thought she would feel dumb.

Told ya. It’s fast pace and fast moving and you better keep up.

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ex – hush man. hush.

ex – I would wear black before I wore pink or red. as it stands I don’t own anything pink or red. lol.

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well I’m hoping for some discussion up in this camp or else I’ll have to start responding to ex. lol.

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This company is so big, most time looking for polices and stuff is sometimes like looking for a needle in a haystack. Most times though, for the job, you need to have the policies handy.

Chile talk about policies…we have to have one for everything as well….either a policy or a protocol and if there is no protocol you’d better get with your team and come up with one…our accreditation is crucial so we’ve definitely got to dot our i’s and cross our t’s…

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I guess VDay has passed….lol

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C – yep. vday is so much hype that it fizzles out fairly quickly. lol. now eyeroll day? that has some staying power. lol.

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Bluz..u know me I’m as real as Disco in some of this superflousness and artifialness of contrived ‘celebrate day’s but I had to spend 56$ on a whim when I went to Publix dis mrning.

Seeing Publix all decked up in Vday goods I just had to represent ,buying a heart shaped box set of chocolate and champagne for Queen, just becoz!!

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Random – I’ve always wanted to take a cruise, but with all the mishaps over the past couple of years, I don’t know if I would want to now!!!

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I ran in Publix to pick some stuff up for my mom last night and there was so much VDay stuff that I couldn’t help but stop and browse. I wondered though, they gotta know they ain’t gonna sell all that stuff. So, then today you can get the 5.99 heart shaped cookie for .01 cent. Now that’s gotta be a treat!

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ex – did you pay for it with your healthcare flex spending card? lol.

bluz – re crusing. I’m hoping like heck this mishap makes the prices fall. I’m already checking for my next cruise and hope to be sailing somewhere in the next couple of months.

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Bluz – Check it out, Raylon is hot!!

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“How hard is it to hear the truth? ”

Once upon a time I had a really good woman. She was pretty, hot and tempting (PHAT). We would go out and spend the night out on the town dancing the night away. She made me very happy. But, there was a problem. The problem was “trust”. Even though we had a great relationship she did not feel she could trust me when I was not in her presence. She told me that I was a great guy and any woman would be glad to have me. I asked her what can I do to gain her “trust” ? She told me there was nothing I could do because my past was too much for her to overcome. She loved the way I treated her but could not “trust” me.

Sometimes the “truth” is hard to hear when you really like someone.

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Robert – Why did you share your past? I know we talked about not ommitting some things but if it’s a past that you’ve abandoned and changed behavior, I don’t see the need to discuss.

I’m there with her. Totally understand her apprehensions. I’ve soooo been there.

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admitting not omitting

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No Disco,I came correct on this…

but I wldnt mind pumping Queen,being very thoughtful and buying her something nice or a wimp

Using her own bank card.

It’s the thought that counts.

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Kimmie – Girrrrrl, that’s just plain awful. You should have told him thanks but no thanks buddy. If there’s ever a time to be outright frank, and no bones about it, this is one. No feelings spared so he’d know not to try that again. Just no class at all.

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Pimping

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bluz – you know my take on trust. you likely can’t trust anyone 100% including yourself. you learn folks as much as you can learn them and then you trust them to do what you expect of them. imo, that’s about as good as it gets. I always use the example that I have two brothers. if I lend them both money I trust that one will pay me back and the other will never mention it again. I don’t trust one more or less than the other, I just know what to expect from them. same goes for folks in relationships. learn what you can expect and determine if you can deal with it.

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@Celisea – When I was a young man I lived, loved and learned many lessons. Today I have a chance. Sometimes you have to go through something in order to understand how to have a meaningful relationship built around respect, trust and love for each other.

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Robert, I get that. I’m sure most have traveled that road. What I don’t get is, if you’re truly learned, turned over a new leaf, why not leave the past behind you? Why would a woman have to know of your past or past behaviors….unless she was privy/a victim or knew you prior to moving into a relationship. I wouldn’t think you to be dishonest, if having a “wild” past is kept in the past. No point in reforming if you’re still being penalized for it.

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Dayum! why she gotta get saved when its my turn.”

Du –

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Cel –

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Afternoon, all. I’m skimming to catch up…..

We straight from the hip shooters don’t walk around being mean or rude. Like others have said, you get what you give. Generally, I’m a nice person (so I’ve been told), but come at me wrong, I can go toe to toe.

That’s true most of the time. But some people are rude, even when it’s unprovoked. I know I’m a nice person, but every now and then that rotten apple rolls across my path.

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disco – I hear ya. I guess I should say that I should at least trust you 90%!

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Cel – Yeah, he “called himself” being funny!!

I was in TJMaxx at lunch and when I came to the counter to pay for my items. the sales lady hits me with the “would you be interested in saving 10 percent today?” I know she was just doing her job, but don’t they know everyone is hip to that, trying to get you to apply for a card?lol

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ITL – Nope…can’t go wrong with that!

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Dang…the tow line bringing in the cruise ship snapped! Those poor people were excited to get him this evening and now…who knows when they’ll get it?

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Ex, no, I don’t get it, but that’s ok. Been in mtg past 2 hrs.

I see you guys are chatting away.

kimmie ~ a friend called one year saying he had a Vday gift for me. He bought it over about 2 days after Vday. He sold baskets and crap to the patrons at clubs. I looked at him and thanked him for the gift, but told him I had no use for a smoking smelling teddy bear, a chocolate flower, a holder w/no candle and a ripped basket. He said it must have gotten tossed around in his car. I smiled and said possibly, thank you. I never accepted it because he needed to know I knew the real deal. Also, the feeling was too darn strong to throw it away while still in his presence.

ITL ~ we are humans and when pushed, we all have the capacity to be rude.

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Thus the saying….”what did you expect”

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For me, I trust folks to do exactly what they’re gonna do. The old them, the new or the reformed. If you’ve reformed, I expect reformed behavior. If you’re a liar, well no more than that. If you’re stand, why should or would I expect less?

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Now, I’m just rambling…lololol

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@disco: You were talking about chocolate-covered strawberries yesterday, and now I’m craving them. Thanks a lot.

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@disco- Ignorance is bliss, I wouldn’t want to know.

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learn what you can expect and determine if you can deal with it.

@Disco..hey Relationship counselor!

so u aint in none coz u cant deal with none?

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I’m just trying to be on the list just in case it doesn’t work out.

@Disco…so how is he putting you on the waiting list or it is u putting urself on a waiting list?

For me, if i were the guy, u aint on my waiting list unless I am smashing..then telling you, yea, ima come back for more coz u cool like that.

so..how are uall rollling and spending quality time?

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purple iris and stargazers!!??

flowers? @Kimmie?

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“… how would you react to a chick inquiring about being wait-listed? can I ride the bench til I get a chance to play?” – Curious what kind of proof would you ask for that he actually is no longer seeing his gf??

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disco – That don’t sound like the normal blog you. That’s sounding a bit desperate…no harm when I say that. IMO, you’re talking like a dude. IJS Not a good like, girlie!

Shake that zero and get yaself a hero!! Remember that from Ricki Lake?? That was her mantra…lol

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leggs – if it gets to that point he won’t have to prove to me that he’s not seeing her, he’ll have to prove to her that he’s not seeing me. I’m not playing this game to creep, I’m playing this game to win. lol. (of course, I’m trash talking and serious at the same time).

C – actually this is me. the me from back in my “man-chasing” days. I was going to get what I want. I can see how some might think it reeks of desperation. trust me when I say I’m not going to throw myself at him. I’m just going to ask questions. thing is if you knew me, you’d be like my friends. they all wanna know who is this dude because apparently I don’t like anybody. like I said, I’m not in it to break it up. I’m just gauging how serious it is. I know some folks are in relationships just because. if what they got ain’t strong and there’s a chance to move in, then so be it.

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C – if he says I love my girl and I’m planning to marry her. I’ll march on but since nothing beats a failure but a try I have to put my bid in. listen at me. “bid”. yeah I am going back into game mode. lol.

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disco – All is fair in love and war… I just think it’s all a little, I dunno, “something” to be going after a dude not really strong in his relationship, or him talking to another outside of his relationship, almost like “stealing” him away. I just tend to think how people are, is how people are. And if he’s “talking” and almost willing to become intimate while with another and you pretty much know this, not a good look. If you’re zeroing in on all of this, IMO it says a lot where this dude lack.

I don’t think I’d be having conversations while I’m booed, to another. Even if we ain’t, weren’t didn’t, maynot (so forth and so on) make it. IMO, the honorable thing would be to end it. Too, who stays in a relationship going apparently nowhere? Seems like betrayal on one end and selfishness by “taking” on your end.

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Almost like preying on the weak. You don’t strike me as taking on the weak. I can see the feathers of the bird disappearing as you close your mouth around the canary…lol

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ex – I am confident. as far as I’m concerned in relationships there are spouses and everybody else. period. she’s an everybody else and I’m an everybody else. lol.

leggs – in my original post I started to say I was really just seeking male input. for the most part I knew what stance females would be taking. it is what it is. as for the in it to win it/break them up aspect, that’s one I’m still pondering. if I wanted to secure a jumpoff position I’m sure I could and little miss girlfriend would likely never know. thing is I’m not going to take that route. shoot they might break up 3 months from now for reasons unrelated to me. he just needs to know if that happens he needs to holler at his girl (me).

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Thanks for the clarification, disco.

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okay. since my business is now officially in the street let me throw out the wild card. where’s swiss when I need him? lol. old boy is white. yep. white. I have never ever checked for a white man in my life but old boy is fine, fine, fine. oh and this ain’t just all out the blue. we been chitchatting since the summertime.

dushawn – yep. I swear some days I have that little angel/devil thing going on my shoulders. right now I’m still chilling but don’t think I ain’t thinking, planning, weighing pros and cons and all that.

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Had to laugh at your post Celisea, but disco doesn’t know if his girl is weak just yet. She might be, but disco doesn’t know that. Hell, she could be another disco….scratch that (lolol).

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@Disco.there are wives out there who ho their hubbies 24/7 coz they know the hubbys have very good apetites…if they dont deliver physically and sexually,the bull destroys the bullpen,sniffing elswhere.

u got as skrong back to maintain what u wanna start…??

if u a good chic, all in all,ur money good, ur looks good, ur vibe good, ur mouf dont pop off nonsense..all a man needs is good kneck show to win him over…..

play the good wife

u cook by the way!…

coz ther e is nothing better than a chic that runs downstairs to make some thing hot after he empties his sack!

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Leggs – I done gone and pictured some mousy dude staying and hoping and hoping and hoping…kind of like a chick hanging on, KNOWING she’s a stand in for a dude until better comes along. Shoot plenty of dudes have a stand in when chicks are mousy and push overs. I just pictured dude getting devoured.

At this point, since they’ve been communicating and disco been tryna get in a long time now, I say step to his girl and say, hey chick, I’m taking your dude. Guarantee, that chick ain’t gonna hardly care cause that dude has been a stand-in ONLY all this time. Sort of like keeping one until something better comes along. Well, in this case, disco can “rescue” and get it done. Just TAKE him from ole girl…lololol

disco – GO FOR IT!!! Then you can join the rest of us “booed” folks on here

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old boy is white. yep. white. I have never ever checked for a white man in my life

Me either…do your thang mami…

right now I’m still chilling but don’t think I ain’t thinking, planning, weighing pros and cons and all that.

disco…trust me, he knows whats up and the opportunity WILL present itself…been there and done that so I know. Watch,wait and see…plus if y’all been all chatty for a minute, he might be waitin to make a move of his own. Girlfriend, smirlfriend…if it’s serious then govern yourself accordingly but if it ain’t then…

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Celisea ~ she’s not going to step to the woman and flat out tell she’s taking him. I’m on the floor laughing. I know back in the day women did just that. Hell, game the same, players change. So….

disco, step to him, leave her alone (lol).

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Damn, I am laughing my a$$ off at disco telling another woman she’s about to take her man, and the competition begins as to who will keep him and who will GET HIM…

Ding, ding, ding….off and running.

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there ain’t never been no shame in my game. I own me and I own mine. so far I’ve done nothing wrong but I am feeling this dude.

Me either disco and that’s part of what some folks can’t/couldn’t deal with when it came to me.. I’ve never been shy about it either so I’m with you on that. Shyyd…make it do what it do…

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Celisea is going in all cave woman style. Grab him by his knutts and sling him over your shoulders back to your cave!

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sassy – thanks. I like it when someone really truly seems to get where I’m coming from.

C – you crazy. I ain’t bit more thinking about his woman like that. I’m needing for old boy to have a “sunshine” moment. remember harlem nights? I’m never coming home? lol. that’s what I’m talking about.

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Leggs – I just laughed at your 4:40…I’m just having fun these last few minutes.

I say folks should get in where they fit in. Just like me and mine

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skip over my post, Celisea. I read wrong.

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C – have at it. I ain’t even mad. child my real life friends are like “who is this dude? he got you wide open”. lol. yep. it’s like that and he don’t even know. this is why I absolutely will go for mine when it’s time.

oh. and y’all oughtta know I ain’t checking for no punk azz brothers. no I ain’t trying to get with no punk azz non-brothers. lol. he’s bout it. trust.

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Howdy, @disco.

You already know my opinion on your situation. You go & get your swirl on, chica. Lol

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disco – I want nothing but happiness and the best for you. Get in where you fit it. Just might be your soulmate

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@DuShawn. You’re telling disco to go “school” him!!!

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swiss / sassy – that’s the biggest dilemma. I wish I was just trying to swirl. I think that conquest would be easy. like I said, I’m trying to set it up to be next in line when he breaks up with his current. I’m claiming him. lol.

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Oh, and my car rides nicely…just need washing

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@disco — Hey, I’m all in favor of the long term to permanent swirl, too. Lol.

Plus — and, granted, I am a bit biased here — but I’m living proof that swirling produces the cutest babies. Lol

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disco – be careful…you’re starting to sound like me! LOL!!!

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No she’s doesn’t Bluz (lol). She’s looking for more than just Magnum!!

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bluz – but trust I’m so not like you in this regard. no offense or anything but you see how much thought, energy, strategy I put into all this (heck, I even tossed some prayer into this one). you just dive right in on emotion, I’m on a mission. I plan. we way different sis.

swiss – unfortunately I’m a bit color struck. I was perturbed that my son came out a little bit on the light skinned side. lol.

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disco – you know I’m kiddin with ya! I know you’ve been thinking and planning for a bit. That’s how I’d rather be!!!

Ok…I’ll check in when I get home…

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C – eyeroll. lol.

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disco, so if you get this man, will you be able to trust him?

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well you can already expect him to cheat

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that is cheating. it will be downhill from there

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