Is this a bad time?
I think many failed romances are a result of bad timing. You can appear to be very compatible and show great potential, but if the timing is wrong, it all falls apart. We don’t always realize that it is the wrong time, though. I believe we get caught up in attraction and end up realizing it way too late that it’s the right person, wrong time.
This is especially true when someone is nursing a heartbreak, mourning the end of a long relationship or marriage. I think people need to just have fun and let dating be about the “palate cleansers” to clear the lingering bad taste you may have from the ex. Even when we feel ready, it’s not until things get hot and heavy with the rebound relationship that we can see how important timing is.
Have you ever met someone really great at a really bad time in your life? How did you handle it?
I think if we were more honest with people we date about where we are – emotionally, it could save a lot of heartache. When you let folks know what head space you are in – you would be surprised at how understanding some people can be. Many of us have been there and know that it takes time to be in the right place to start something new.
How do figure out if it is a bad time to start a serious relationship? How do you let the person you just met know that? Is it fair to ask them to wait until the timing is better for you?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blof
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© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
181 comments Add your comment
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:52 pm
Leggs – Leviticus 15 (read the entire chapter), Leviticus 18:19. There are other places, but those two chapters are what I recalled. Also, Rachel (Jacob’s) wife stole Laban’s image and when he went chasing after Jacob (cause he just needed a reason), he said someone stole his image. Jacob, not knowing Rachel had stolen, said if you can find it, the person will be punished. Well, when he came to her tent to search for it (cause he was searching everybody), she told him she was on her period, so he wouldn’t make her get up. She was sitting on it.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
12:56 pm
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
12:59 pm
This is the stuff that turns people off the blog.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
1:00 pm
What, the nasties or biblical stuff??? Leggs asked so I provided.
Willie Dynamite
January 30th, 2013
1:04 pm
Afternoon all,
Just read the last few posts and talk about bad timing, touché~
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
1:06 pm
Celisea – I’m not a prude, but I’ve just never found discussing body fluids entertaining, especially with men.
Button
January 30th, 2013
1:06 pm
Courtside yes dates should be an interview and you should but some thought behind why you are spending x amount of time and money with said person other than just because. I agree you should have fun while dating but not dating just for the fun of it. Most people invest emotions and bonds are made quickly for some so taking those two things into conderation should be the kept in mind. I don’t know about most people but as for me I date for a reason not because a man asks me out. Call me old fashion but that’s how I date.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
1:09 pm
kimmie – Me either but it’s kind of gross….IMO
Okay changing the topics
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
1:16 pm
I hope u folks are safe by the time u drive home coz the weather has gon real left right quick…wet,windy and cold…dark!!
but for us Lucky folks fuggin tonite…it’s Heaven!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
1:28 pm
Random O/T I just had a creepy/funny experience. I was waiting on the elevator here @ work and another guy who was also waiting turns to me and starts trying to mack me. One of his eyes was moving around(like it had a mind of it’s own) and the other was looking at me(I think)…and the more he talked it seemed like that wayward eye would move more. I tried not to laugh…and that fact that his game was wiggety-whack made it even funnier…I know he heard me laughing when I got off of the elevator. Don’t judge me
Alright…back to lurking…
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
1:29 pm
Ex, you never cease to amaze.
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
1:31 pm
Sassy –
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
1:31 pm
Your beauty had the eye jumping….
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
1:32 pm
One of his eyes was moving around(like it had a mind of it’s own) and the other was looking at me(I think)…
I just burst out laughing. Wasn’t expecting that. Folks should know their lanes….lololol
Gotta grab luch
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
1:37 pm
@Leggs…this weather is fuggin weather..u disagree??
Cnbc got some nice bimbos…very pretty white chics…we need more sisters doing business reporting..
I am sure African Americans will proly be encouraged to invest even more if that were to happen.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
1:37 pm
Your beauty had the eye jumping….
Awww thank you chica
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
1:39 pm
..is it too soon to turn the topic to valentine’s day……Last Valentine’s day I didn’t spend much. I picked up some seafood, and cooked some lobster tails, mussels, and a cajun pasta dish, with a salad and dessert. The kids turned our dining room into a 5 star restaurant. We all dressed up and had a candle light dinner. My son was our waiter and my girls played their violins softly for ambiance while we ate. Wifey really enjoyed it. This year Imma take her to check out Laylah Hathaway at the Variety playhouse. I’m still working on the rest of the evening.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
1:39 pm
Kimmie?!…what’s a girl to do?…it was just the two of on that elevator and the ride up seemed extra long for some reason…bleck
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
1:41 pm
I don’t disagree, Ex. That wasn’t the point I was making. It’s not important.
Willie Dynamite
January 30th, 2013
1:42 pm
Sassy- ill leave the eye thing alone cause that’s just funny. Far as dude tho they say nothing ventured nothing gained. Some dudes take the shotgun approach and just spit at 100 chicks. 1 or 2 bound to fall for it. Then some dudes are like snipers. Ole boy sounds like a shotgunner. He’s use to and comfortable with the rejection. He will try you again every time he see you.
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
1:43 pm
Sounds like it was a nice evening, DuShawn. Cute son as waiter and girls providing background music.
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
1:46 pm
Du – That sounds fabulous!!
It’s actually hubs birthday today! I got him a really nice jacket he has been wanting and the kids gave him cards. We’re going out for lunch with the rest of his family on Saturday, but I am grabbing him some Smashburgers & fries for dinner tonight with the kids. He loves burgers.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
1:49 pm
He will try you again every time he see you.
He just might…but I’ll shut him AND his wayward eye
down every time,too.
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
2:11 pm
It’s pouring!!
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
2:16 pm
U like Pouring ladies?
U like Pouring gents?
disco
January 30th, 2013
2:18 pm
sassy – I feel you on the stray eyed brother. to that experience I say better you than me. lol. I probably shouldn’t laugh though. I’ll be on here next week talking about the lazy eyed fellow at the grocery store who asked me what I was cooking. my laughter is hereby withdrawn.
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
2:21 pm
@Disco? U mocking the disabled?
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
2:22 pm
Why yall so shallow. That man could be a good brother. Women always talkin bout there are no good men left. You could learn to love that eye.
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
2:26 pm
Ok, along with stank boy and lazy-eyed fellow, we now have jumping eye guy to join the club.
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
2:31 pm
Dushawn – I don’t see yall checking for no lazy eyed women, unless it’s just to smash & run!LOL!! Plus she didn’t say he wasn’t a good man, but his mack was wack on top of the lazy eye! Plus, Sassy got a good man!!
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
2:32 pm
Excuse me, not lazy eyed, jumping eyed!
disco
January 30th, 2013
2:36 pm
kimmie – one of my cousins married a chick with what the family refers to as “scattered eyes”. lol. she loves his dingy azz drawers. we joke that that’s part of the reason why she feels like he is such a prize when the truth is he’s not worth the spit it would take to cuss him. she loves him though and I guess that’s all that matters.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
2:37 pm
I’ll be on here next week talking about the lazy eyed fellow at the grocery store who asked me what I was cooking.
You going down Kimmie
I was trying not to look at the wandering eye…but kinda kept looking at it anyway. I wonder if he ever thought about a patch?
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
2:38 pm
“scattered eyes”.
I almost sprayed my monitor
disco
January 30th, 2013
2:39 pm
D – I own my shallow. I went out with a guy once that had a deformed leg left over from some childhood illness or other. I was so not feeling that. didn’t take away from the person he was but I was always telling him he needed to wear pants (all the time) and he insisted on wearing shorts. it was not a good look. I know. I’m wrong. oh and don’t get me started on the “fatties”. again they can have the best hearts/character/personality in the world but I don’t want to be laid up under no 400 pound somebody. ewww.
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
2:39 pm
Sassy, that was Disco talking about the grocery store dude!!LOL!!
disco
January 30th, 2013
2:40 pm
sassy – her eyes are scattered and she wears pop bottle glasses to boot. she’s a cool chick and all but she’s most definitely not a looker. or maybe she is since she can see in so many directions at once. lol. okay. my bad. I’m sorry.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
2:41 pm
oh and don’t get me started on the “fatties”. again they can have the best hearts/character/personality in the world but I don’t want to be laid up under no 400 pound somebody. ewww.
_________________flatline________________________
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
2:41 pm
Disco – Actually, that leg probably would not have bothered me. I can’t do fatties either though.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
2:43 pm
I’m still laughing…..lolololololol
It’s always the cockeyed, fat, “just shouldn’t” dudes that tryna holla or commenting or looking….
Back to lurking and working….I’m still laughing
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
2:43 pm
How bout this brother in IT is overly sweating Ms. Office New booty. My man don’t have any covert office decorum with it. She and I came in the office the same time this morning. She bent the corner towards her area and I was walking to my office when Buddy appeared from nowhere huffing and puffing like he’d been running, looking for her. He saw me and asked “Did that female go this way”. I chuckled and said “ yeah man, she went that way” he tore out after her.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
2:46 pm
I just re-read that statement and burst out laughing again…
Whew Lawdy, back to work
disco
January 30th, 2013
2:46 pm
celisea – they don’t even have to be full fledged fatties for me. I can’t even get with an average size guy with an above averaged size belly. that just turns me off. nothing sexy about the stomach hanging. throw some man boobs in the equation and the whole thing is just wrong.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
2:49 pm
throw some man boobs in the equation and the whole thing is just wrong.
I just hollered…..whew buddy. But it’s all soooooooo true. Cannot do fatties…no way
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
2:51 pm
My bad kimmie….
her eyes are scattered and she wears pop bottle glasses to boot.
Awww then…the poor baby
throw some man boobs in the equation and the whole thing is just wrong.
that’s a sho nuff deak breaker…
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
2:56 pm
Damn….. Dude pick up a few extra pounds and He gets NOTHING for you ladies…… Haven’t you heard…Fat can be fixed……
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
2:59 pm
You all are cracking me up now!LOL!!
disco
January 30th, 2013
3:01 pm
courtside – if it makes you feel any better I’m equally biased against petite men. you know the ones that are too thin. if my legs or arms are bigger than dude’s then it’s not going to work. lol. I’ve joked about trying to do the do and feeling like you are playing pick up sticks with his little teeny tiny legs. naw. I can’t get with that.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
3:06 pm
. if my legs or arms are bigger than dude’s then it’s not going to work.
————flatline———
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
3:15 pm
she’s most definitely not a looker. or maybe she is since she can see in so many directions at once.
disco ~ off to corner!