Is this a bad time?
I think many failed romances are a result of bad timing. You can appear to be very compatible and show great potential, but if the timing is wrong, it all falls apart. We don’t always realize that it is the wrong time, though. I believe we get caught up in attraction and end up realizing it way too late that it’s the right person, wrong time.
This is especially true when someone is nursing a heartbreak, mourning the end of a long relationship or marriage. I think people need to just have fun and let dating be about the “palate cleansers” to clear the lingering bad taste you may have from the ex. Even when we feel ready, it’s not until things get hot and heavy with the rebound relationship that we can see how important timing is.
Have you ever met someone really great at a really bad time in your life? How did you handle it?
I think if we were more honest with people we date about where we are – emotionally, it could save a lot of heartache. When you let folks know what head space you are in – you would be surprised at how understanding some people can be. Many of us have been there and know that it takes time to be in the right place to start something new.
How do figure out if it is a bad time to start a serious relationship? How do you let the person you just met know that? Is it fair to ask them to wait until the timing is better for you?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blof
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181 comments Add your comment
Mark
January 30th, 2013
11:09 am
disco @9:49: A guy would be crazy to marry just anyone these days. Remember the alimony/child support, etc?
disco
January 30th, 2013
11:13 am
mark – most of these jokers that I’m referring to are living off of their women anyway. alimony, child support, shoot paying the cable are the furthest things from their minds.
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:19 am
disco ~ every time I eat an ice cream cone I think of the little perverted man that used to take pictures for Jet magazine. I was walking downtown eating a cone when this man approaches me about being in the magazine. I knew he was talking smack because I was too skinny to be one the ladies of the week featured therein. I thanked him and said no thanks. He then asked what flavor ice cream I was eating with his gleaming eyes. I told him it doesn’t matter, he can’t have any and walked off.
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
11:21 am
disco, Not tryin to fugg up your meal time, but Leggs dropped all of the key words that feed into the visual….
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
11:21 am
Morning All!!
I have been in some “bad timing” situations and they are heartbreaking. What I would call bad timing is meeting someone a few months before they are getting ready to move to California or to Paris France, or shipping off to take that contract postition in Saudi Arabia. You have gone out and gotten to know each other enough that you hit it off and the chemistry is off the chain and this is a great person. But not enough to be making plans to get engaged and move with this person. So you try the long distance thing, but of course that does not work. That’s what I call bad timing, not the agenda stuff.
This “agenda” stuff has been coming up alot lately from you blog dudes. Some of you really have a problem with some women that know what they want and don’t want to waste their time “just seeing how it goes” for months and years on end and not buying your BS!!! LOL!! Sucks to be you, don’t it?LOL!!
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
11:22 am
@Leggs – just curious, can you eat a banana in on bite
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
11:23 am
Just wow…..just dang wow
disco
January 30th, 2013
11:24 am
courtside – it doesn’t really mess up my meal time (I live alone, I eat alone, I can go at it – lol). just saying how it is kind of trifling how fellas get caught up in something so basic and innocent. dang. a chick can’t enjoy a popsicle or ice cream cone on a summer day if she’s in a man’s presence. that’s jacked up. what’s funny though is when you tell a man he’s tearing that popsicle up. dude be ready to just throw it I away. lol.
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:31 am
I used to call her “Legs” (no disrespect to the one on here). – Then let’s keep it that way!
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
11:32 am
@disco ..lol…Real men don’t eat popsicles.
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:33 am
Forgot the lol
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:34 am
Real men eat popsicle toes….
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
11:37 am
LOL…. Come on disco, What do you think of that grown azz man you see walking around the park slow eating a popsicle???? For us, seeing women doing things that carry suggestive double meanings is FUN…. Women eyeball guys the same way…
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:40 am
When I see a man eating a banana, I think and see a man eating a banana. No suggestive double meaning there (lolololol).
disco
January 30th, 2013
11:46 am
dushawn – uh huh. I know fellas be having at the popsicles, the bomb pops, the push ups, all that. still you remind me of an episode of jenny jones. yes I said jenny jones. this is going way way back. she had some kind of sexy man show and there was one guy who was incredibly sexy. tall, thick, muscular, chocolate brown. mmm he was nice. anyway, how come there was a talent portion and old boy’s talent was licking ice cream out of a bowl. yep. licking ice cream out of a bowl. the audience went wild. mm mmmm mmmmm.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
11:46 am
This is my new Hollywood crush. Alongside Laz
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://handson.provocateuse.com/images/photos/michael_vartan_05.jpg&imgrefurl=http://handson.provocateuse.com/show/michael_vartan&h=576&w=735&sz=57&tbnid=VoFSjXVtkJXg9M:&tbnh=82&tbnw=105&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dmichael%2Bvartan%26tbm%3Disch%26tbo%3Du&zoom=1&q=michael+vartan&usg=__j8o4AbU23snG_l50jHJrAP1tbn4=&hl=en&sa=X&ei=_k0JUeO8NeP7iwK224GYDw&ved=0CDEQ9QEwBA
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
11:47 am
He’s digging ethnic chicks. He’s done a couple of onscreen “black” loves. That just makes me dig him that much more
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
11:48 am
Please pardon me. Y’all was having the banana discussion. Okay, back to work. Or back to looking at stuff on the net, while working…lololol
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
11:49 am
Courtside ~ disco beat you in the visual department!!!
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
11:50 am
I can’t lie, them bomb pops are the joint. But I bite mine and chew hard like a man!
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
11:58 am
Ok….. Here we go…. Just got a text from a “friend”…. Says she is feeling some kinda way and wants to know if I can swing by afterwork and “hang”…. No problem, except she has “company” in town… Thoughts???? How big are you ladies on that level of taboo????
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
12:01 pm
@Leggs? ..how bout when u see a tall man with long pair of feet?
U just think,’damn he is so proportionally created?’
No double meaning for ya?
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:03 pm
That text is laden with mixed signals. See that “feeling some kinda way” needs to be voiced so you can hear the inflections in her tone to pick up on the true meaning. Is her company staying with her? Is her company someone she used to sleep with, still sleeping with, but wants you?
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
12:03 pm
Courtside – I don’t understand, is she talking threesome?
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
12:04 pm
Court? Company as in her girlfriend or boyfriend?
If gifriend maybe a 3sum in the offing.
If guy friend maybe she gon use u to dump him
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
12:05 pm
yawn…
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:05 pm
No, Ex, because I usually don’t think that. I usually think “that’s one tall dude” and k.i.m.
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
12:06 pm
Company and in Aunt Flow….. Hence the taboo…..
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:07 pm
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrkkkkkkkk…..Aunt Flow is a no no
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:08 pm
If guy friend maybe she gon use u to dump him – good one.
Or, Courtside is about to get ambushed!! Why would she be inviting another man to handle her “feeling some kinda way” while she has company in town? Is company the jealous type. Is she trying to make him jealous. Just stay away!
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:09 pm
I thought “company” was that time of the month??? Maybe I misread
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:09 pm
Pump your brakes….no one thought Aunt Flow. Again, just stay away! She shouldn’t be calling you up to handle her. I digress, I know some women don’t care and use that time to let the body to do what the body needs to do. To each their own….
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:10 pm
Well, Celisea thought that. The rest of us went left…
kimmie
January 30th, 2013
12:11 pm
Imma go on to lunch. Aunt Flow & banana’s are snooze topics for me. The topic discussion was interesting before all that mess.
disco
January 30th, 2013
12:11 pm
leggs – uhn huh. especially since we know that all those “tells” are often just a myth anyway. tall, big hands, big feet none of it matters. dude can still be packing cocktail shrimp.
courtside – you might want to clarify some thangs. you might be getting set up for the okey doke. lol.
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:12 pm
I agree. I was just sitting here thinking, the body is doing what it needs to do. Don’t mess with that.
Don’t shoot me, but there’s a place in the scripture that speaks to a man not laying in a woman’s blood…IJS
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:13 pm
I didn’t think it. I wasn’t gonna comment case I was “yawning” like Sassy. When he said company as in Aunt Flow, is when I jumped in. Frankly I thought it was to spark convo….lololol
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:15 pm
Frankly, it’s just nasty….in my humble opinion. Folks say it helps with cramps. She ain’t cramping, she’s just wanting some. She can wait! My face is twitching up as I type this.
DuShawn
January 30th, 2013
12:15 pm
@Court- Man, ain’t no taboo. Just lay a towel down. It’s biblical, even Moses parted the Red sea. Just don’t wake up with dried up tomato sauce in your mustache the next morning.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 30th, 2013
12:17 pm
Aunt Flow & banana’s are snooze topics for me. The topic discussion was interesting before all that mess.
I sooo cosign…
disco
January 30th, 2013
12:17 pm
OOO-kay. y’all done went left and turned the corner with it. courtside, just leave it alone. all coochie ain’t good coochie. how bout that? lol.
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
12:26 pm
Moses parting the red sea! Lol
@DuShawn!!
Craazy!!
Court wld have to be real hengrrrry to have to lay a towel to get sum
Gross!
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:27 pm
Don’t be misled….
Leviticus 15 (read it all), Letivicus 18:19, Ezekiel speaks of it as well….IJS
Celisea
January 30th, 2013
12:28 pm
I know for the most part we’re anonymous, but that ain’t cool man. IJS Some things are TMI…for real!!! lololol
I thought it was a pretty good flow going as well, until we were brought to a screeching halt. I was doing good lurking and working
Exiled!
January 30th, 2013
12:31 pm
But I won’t lie,in my single hungry days,we could work that out,hit a home run then take a shower soon after..
Please don’t judge me too harshly!
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:33 pm
I do too, Celisea. The body is cleansing itself. Let it do what it’s designed to do. I would like to read that scripture. Do you know where it is?
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:34 pm
Just don’t wake up with dried up tomato sauce in your mustache the next morning. – EEWWWW!!! Who does that!!!!
disco
January 30th, 2013
12:35 pm
so… is it too soon to turn the topic to valentine’s day or do we want to avoid that topic altogether?
Leggs
January 30th, 2013
12:43 pm
Tornado has hit Bartow County:
http://www.ajc.com/news/news/local/tornado-watch-issued-for-northwest-georgia/nT9xH/
Courtside Seats!!! Caught on the Kiss Cam :)
January 30th, 2013
12:47 pm
wow…did not mean to kill the blog flow….. Just wanted to know what some of you ladies thought about that… had no idea I would be hit in the head with the good book….