Defend her honor!
I completely missed all the brouhaha surrounding NBA basketball players Carmelo Anthony and Kevin Garnett. Apparently Garnett lost his cool and made the ultimate low blow by making a disparaging remark about Anthony’s wife (side bar: honey nut cherrios? Seriously stop referring to women as food guys).
As any man would do, Anthony got angry and then confronted Garnett. It made me think about the many times I’ve been with a guy who sat by while I was being disrespected. Obviously I am not a wife, but when you are with a woman, is it wrong to expect the man to defend her?
What would you do if you found yourself faced with a situation that required you to speak up on behalf of your date? Would you do it without hesitation? Would it bother you if someone defended your honor?
I remember once I was on a date and this rude drunk kid said something insulting to my guy. Before I knew it, I was up in that kid’s face fully prepared for a smack down. I know, classy, right?! Anyway – my guy was NOT happy at all that I didn’t let him handle it himself. I practically broke a fabulous shoe and this ungrateful dude did not even give me credit for having his back!
Needless to say, I am way more careful how I defend a dude’s honor. I let him go first and I have his back ..at a safe distance. What do you think? Is it best to let men defend themselves?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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291 comments Add your comment
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
2:39 pm
IJS that you can be quite judgemental…
cosign Bluz…
It’s funny how some folks use their experiences to define the whole situation for hundreds of thousands of people ALL around the world. Talk about painting with a broad brush…but oh well everyone’s opinion is just that…theirs and you know what they say about opinions.
Exiled
January 10th, 2013
2:41 pm
ok they like it but u know Mexicans and folks of their ilk hunch a lot…
catholics..no birf control…plenty kids..
so i aint too far in my analysis
@abc.. no offense to my puerto rican fo
Bluzgirl
January 10th, 2013
2:41 pm
Hmmm…never met one person that you knew the next year. That says more about you, I think.
I met several of my closest friends at the clubs I used to frequent. The ones I’ve know for over 10 years (heck, even the ones I’ve met within the past year) are very genuine, good hearted, and would do anything for the people they care about…
Jake-SPJTWB
January 10th, 2013
2:42 pm
they eating my posts today
Jake-SPJTWB
January 10th, 2013
2:44 pm
Anyway…good women/and skankers are everywhere…in same places…you just gotta choose appropriately
Exiled
January 10th, 2013
2:47 pm
does withdrawal ever work…..for some..??
i cant imagine a dude taking it out when the guud is getting sweeter.
@Catholics
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
2:48 pm
Challpee ~ we already know the answer. You may be the only one left curious.
DuShawn
January 10th, 2013
2:50 pm
I’m still on the topic of defending a women’s honor. I could remember in high school I used to date this pretty little dark-skinned cheerleader. We broke up my senior year. I went away to college and a friend of mine started dating her. When I came home on breaks, I would still hit her. Some of our mutual friends knew, but kept their mouths closed. One afternoon, I’m knockin her down at her moms house, her brother was on the porch, and my buddy pulled up and asks if she was home. The brother covered for me and told her boyfriend she wasn’t there. About an hour or so later we finished up, showered up and I’m in the kitchen eating the lunch she prepared. By this time her brother had gone, my buddy pulls back up, sees us in the kitchen thru the screen door, comes in the house looks at me and immediately grabs her by the throat and slams her back against the refrigerator. I jumped up…walk towards him…..and said “playa that’s between yall I’m out”…….As life would have it; they ended up getting married and are still together today.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
2:51 pm
good women/and skankers are everywhere…in same places…you just gotta choose appropriately
My point exactly Jake…
MsAtl
January 10th, 2013
2:52 pm
Challpee & Leggs- Right, because one of those is attempted murder.
abc
January 10th, 2013
2:52 pm
That doesn’t surprise me, Bluzgirl.
Now, ex, you should check it out — first time I was in the middle of it was on a cruise ship that ported out of San Juan, a mostly Puerto Rican populated vessel. The salsa band on that boat was incredible! Until you’ve seen a room full of Puerto Ricans tearing it up with an awesome band, you haven’t seen salsa dancing. It motivated me and my wife to take some lessons and join them. They thought it was unusual to see us out and among them.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
2:52 pm
yawn…
Bluzgirl
January 10th, 2013
2:54 pm
What do you mean by that abc?
Du – you should write a book with all your stories!
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
2:54 pm
What is Chapelle aksing actually…
me no get it
Challpee
January 10th, 2013
2:55 pm
Hey, all I wanted to know is how to Axe one….
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
2:57 pm
@abc…I know,when in Rome do them (I’m giving u the Negro version of it)
U and wife were gracious and kind!
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:00 pm
Sassy, my point too.
Challpee ~ all you want to do is start trouble!
Ex, don’t worry about not getting this one!!!
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
3:00 pm
@Du…So the brother was on the porch,looking out to wad off enemies?
and u smashing sis? Daaamn!
that’s gutter!
I doubt they do that even in Disco’s hood!
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:03 pm
Seems like many men will walk away while a woman gets snatched up by her man. I understand the beef may be between the two of them, but how would you really feel if him snatching her up got out of hand and he murdered her. Would you feel bad you didn’t step in…seriously, not looking for humor here.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
3:12 pm
Would you feel bad you didn’t step in…seriously, not looking for humor here.
Leggs I wonder what the blog men will have to say to that…
DuShawn
January 10th, 2013
3:14 pm
I’m sitting here thinking about life and the Journey of the people in that last story. My pretty fine 18 year old cheerleader is now overweight, in her mid forties with three kids. Her husband, my buddy, got shot in the head in 2004. He survived, but it’s like he had a stroke, permanently disabled. She spends most of her day taking care of him, I respect her for that. Her brother, who covered for me, got killed in a motorcycle accident about 15 years ago. Whew…….Sometimes I truly wonder why God favors me so.
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:17 pm
Sometimes Karma hits the wrong target before finding the intended target.
Not saying I want anything to happen to you DuShawn, but man seems you’ve dodged an arsenal of fire power!
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:24 pm
Alphabet man, I agree with you on the dancing. Salsa as well as swing dancing is not only invigorating and good exercise, it provides great opportunity for couples to communicate and touch incorporating coordination and trust while having fun. Not to mention Salsa is a very sexy dance.
Challpee
January 10th, 2013
3:24 pm
Anyway, did yall know airplanes are very, very, very poisonous?????? All it takes is a drop and you’re a gonner. Man I am on a roll, no seriously I am sitting on a roll left over from dinner toady. Trouble? me? never!
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
3:24 pm
Leggs…u call the popo…
snitch on him.
But I ain’t gon go in between unless I pack heat myself to back me up.
America is full of crazy folks with guns,unfortunately
kimmie
January 10th, 2013
3:31 pm
Hey Raqi!!
What’s going on lady?? Long time, no read!! How are the kiddies & hubs? How are you?
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:31 pm
Ex ~ fair enough, call the po po. Sounds like many simply walk away and what happens, happens.
Good to see you Raqi (if you’re real).
Who didn’t see he wanted to start some isht, literally?
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
3:32 pm
Wrong target before intended target
@Leggs..seems u guilty of instigating to God or Satan here.
What if Du is truly different but jest re-telling a story?
Actually,karma is a human figment. Nothing Godly bout it.
It ain’t real.
Otherwise I need a bible authority to convince me bout that.
I know ‘u reap what u sow’
But then there is repentance!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
3:34 pm
Who didn’t see he wanted to start some isht, literally?
Okay?!
get better honey boo boo…
Exiled!
January 10th, 2013
3:35 pm
Another shooting at a school
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:35 pm
I’m back, Leggs, what you suggested actually happened in Carollton I think, a “couple” was in the parking lot “aruging” and people just walked by the girl was crying and people just walked by, the man dragged the girl away and people just walked by. A few days later they find the girls body!
It’s funny how some folks use their experiences to define the whole situation for hundreds of thousands of people ALL around the world. Talk about painting with a broad brush…but oh well everyone’s opinion is just that…theirs and you know what they say about opinions. = HEADACHE (LOL)
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:35 pm
kimmie ~ I’m always leery now (lol).
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:39 pm
Ex ~ then I came across wrong. Not wanting it to find “intended” target. Wrong choice of words on my part. Instigating??? Naw, nor am I praying to God or hissing at Satan!
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:39 pm
Defending someone’s honor and fighting their battles are two totally separate events IMO. Grown folks shouldn’t be fighting.
As an adult, until the attempt of hands being laid on me or mine, any and every situation while with my mine, of verbal attacks is merely cause for removing ourselves from the hostile environment.
I truly feel that the best Defense of Honor is when someone, mainly friends and/or family, get out of pocket with their words about “mine” when he is not present. See if he is there he will be the man that he is and speak for himself. But when it’s someone getting sassy or rude and he is not around, I will speak highly on his behave and keep it moving.
And this goes for even if I mentioned or said something to you negatively about him on a previous occassion, that does not give you permission to take shots or verbally attack him.
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:41 pm
Hey, Kimmie. All is well with my clan. I hope you and yours are doing well also.
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:41 pm
A bible authority
is there such a person?
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:42 pm
BTW, Ex, no one said anything about Karma being Godly or Karma being a real entity. It is a superstition passed down over the centuries.
DuShawn
January 10th, 2013
3:43 pm
u call the popo…
snitch on him.
What’s a trip, when my man got shot, I was living in Atlanta. I must’ve had about 14 messages from my potnahs at the crib. One of them, whom has yet to grow up, was like “man I heard who did it, we need to mask up and go handle that.” I’m like that’s exactly why I moved away to escape that negative sh&^t.” Another one of my friends with sense said “Man…..we are grown with families now. Those days are done. If you know who did it, tell me and I’ll tell the police. Call me a snitch or whateva you want to.” Dayum…now that I think about it, my potnah “lil pop” said that. He died in 2010.
-As far as the Karma- If one was to consider my total life’s work. I have done far more good than bad. My good deeds are less interesting, so I tend not to share them in this forum.
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:44 pm
LOL Leggs. It’s me.
Has someone being trying to pass themselves off as me?
Girl you know can’t nobody top this fabulousness that exude. There is only one Radiant, Ardent, Quaint, Intense one. LOL
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:44 pm
Raqi, when someone defends you honor when you’re not around because they will never mention it. Only people that want to start some mess come back telling you what others have said. My response to anyone that wants to tell me what someone said about me is if you can’t tell me what you said then don’t tell me anything at all because I really don’t care.
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:46 pm
No such thing as karma, life happens it’s how you handle it that makes the difference.
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:47 pm
Good to read you Raqi. You cross my mind often. Glad you and your family are well.
Tks Sassy.
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:47 pm
I mean you will never know, because they will never mention anything about it.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 10th, 2013
3:50 pm
You’re welcome Leggs..
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:50 pm
Single & Happy, I don’t quite understand your statement.
All I am saying is defending my honor is not letting someone talk crap about me when I am not around. See that’s when it matter the most because it’s then when you are not trying to just impress, but truly defend.
There are a lot people that will sit back and allow crap talk about someone when that person is not there to be offended by their silent betrayal. However on the other hand will seek to impress in your presence possibly hoping for a payoff or payback later down the line.
Raqi
January 10th, 2013
3:51 pm
You too Leggs.
Leggs
January 10th, 2013
3:51 pm
Ok, Raqi’s in the house. Nobody has tried to come as you, but people do try to come on as others. Just checking to make sure. I sure was going to ask a question that only Raqi would know.
Single & Happy
January 10th, 2013
3:54 pm
. Raqi I’m agreeing with you about the defending honor. usually most people don’t sit back they either defend, or join in
Celisea
January 10th, 2013
3:55 pm
Catching up……..I see y’all still going. lol
For the troublemaker, someone please just let me know they’re being reported to Diva??? While Challpee tryna be funny with the “axe you a question” statement, he/she should know it’s “an answer” not a answer. Usually I’m the last to point out that kind of stuff cause it’s just a blog and should be laid back, but if you’re picking and poking, make sure your stuff is all good.
I say we leave sh!tstarters and trouble makers back in 2012. The blog seems to have gotten off to a decent start this year. How bout we keep it this way.
Celisea
January 10th, 2013
3:56 pm
but people do try to come on as others.
So, I’m not crazy huh? Yeah, that’s been going on for sometime now. I say leave all shenanigans back in 2012 and let the blog flow.