Having doubts?
Sometimes a new year bring can bring a new perspective about your relationship status. The time and effort that you have invested in someone helps you to figure out if you are compatible. What happens when you feel that isn’t happening, though? What do you do if you are having doubts about the person you are dating?
Should you bring it up to see if the other person is feeling the same way? Do you wait it out and hope that your doubts are unfounded?
I believe there are times that we overlook our doubts because we get all distracted. Typical things like attention, sex, and money can cause one to disregard doubts. Have you ever ignored your doubts and ended up regretting it later?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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148 comments Add your comment
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
6:55 am
hello All
Life is about making decision and going with the outcome whether good or bad! Life happens for me with very few regrets but relationships aren’t part those! You should be able to talk about anything in your relationship. You should never over look, but rather make up your mind if these are things you can deal with and act accordingly!
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
8:24 am
….because we all get distracted. Typical things like attention(??),sex and money.
I would want clarity on the attention part but well well hello……
Glad to hear that from a womans……Wise Diva at that!
Ima come back and comment but it so happen that I was sleeping and thinking of a ‘person’ and marriage and the term ’sexual narcotic’ crossed my mind…..
I be back!
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
8:46 am
Morning,
Yes I have regretted ignoring that nagging sinking feeling that screams at you, “What the heyal are you still doing here?!!!” However, I guess those things happened for a reason and I’m still living so there you have it. Work in progress and hopefully not a work in REgress
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
8:49 am
Morning!
Haven’t had much doubt since my divorce so I’m good! However, if I’m continuously walking around with a dreadful feeling because my relationship seems to be one-side, a conversation (or a few conversations) will take place. If it’s still one-sided with him not contributing much nor caring, then it’s time to take care of me sans him.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
8:55 am
hey y’all. I hate to be my stereotypical self so early in the morning but my doubts aren’t the general run of the mill doubts. I doubt myself when I calmly discuss something negative with someone and get the same janky result. I wonder if I should have just blanked from the gate. then when a new situation arises I’m torn between diplomacy and just straight acting out. it’s unfortunate but often times angry black woman yields results where sensible black woman just buys time.
Lee
January 3rd, 2013
9:17 am
Morin–looking forward to Friday.
Disco 855 am–its the same for all woman, sorry to say, why must we have to go there when talking in a soft manner should give the same results. shrugs.
Miss Moni
January 3rd, 2013
9:18 am
GOOD Morning MIA!!!
I agree with Single & Happy, “You should be able to talk about ANYTHING in your relationship.” Open and effective communication is one of the keys to a good relationship. If you find yourself hesitate about discussing your doubts or concerns with your significant other then maybe there are some other underlying issues present. Just something to think about. Personally, I have no problem addressing any doubts, I don’t bite my tongue often especially when it concerns something directly effecting me.
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
9:27 am
I’m a believer in communication but it can be very frustrating when the person you’re communicating with doesn’t understand the concept. I’ve done the sit down and talk thing with a guy before and he had no feedback whatsoever. His pov was those were all MY feelings & thoughts so how could he comment on how I felt? And for him to say anything in regards to what I said, would mean he was also owning those thoughts.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
9:32 am
re: “should be able to talk about everything”. I think that one sounds good in theory. of course people in relationships (romantic or otherwise) should be able to talk about any and everything. the problem, the way I see it, is that just about everyone is going to hold something back. maybe for selfish reasons, maybe to protect someone else’s feelings. maybe because they just have some things they plan to take to the grave. they might talk about certain topics in general but never broach them on a personal level.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
9:37 am
SlimNu ~ that would probably drive me batty. Ok, your emotions and thoughts are indeed your own, BUT, if his actions contribute to your heartache, he needs to own some of why you’re feeling the way you are. Good grief, guys, if you don’t want to believe you in fact do dictate the emotions/actions of her heart then stop adding negative thoughts, stop ignoring the pain she’s in, and stop saying it’s all in her mind. If you’re withdrawing from her with no explanation, then you are too are at fault!
Miss Moni
January 3rd, 2013
9:43 am
Disco, I agree that people do choose to hold things back for a variety of reasons. In terms of a relationship, I would hope that if someone is doing something that hurts you or is offensive that you would let them know. Sometimes a person just doesn’t know that something they said or did rubbed you the wrong way unless you let them know.
SlimNu, I’ve been there and have heard the exact same line. I agree that your feelings are your feelings and in my case I just wanted them to be aware. If he had something to contribute fine, if not then at least he knew where I was coming from. Some men have a very difficult time discussing how they feel and that bothers me. I need a man that is able to communicate how he feels, especially when it comes to me.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
9:52 am
And, Miss Moni, the sad part is when you bring to their attention something they may have done that you felt was wrong, they look at you like you have 3 heads and 5 eyes!
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
9:52 am
stop ignoring the pain she’s in, and stop saying it’s all in her mind. If you’re withdrawing from her with no explanation, then you are too are at fault!
Leggs – Worth repeating!
Sometimes a person just doesn’t know that something they said or did rubbed you the wrong way unless you let them know
MM – EXACTLY! I mean, I may not be able to control every little feeling that you have. BUT, if you come to me and I care about how you feel or how I affect you, then I will do what I can, within reason, to correct those things…especially if it’s something that isn’t going to hurt me to do.
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
10:05 am
…..”I’m a believer in communication”……..” should be able to talk about everything”……..” I need a man that is able to communicate how he feels…….” Notice the theme? What is it with women and their innate need to discuss every dayum thing? From my experience, any conversation that begins with your woman saying “We need to talk” is not going to end well.
Miss Moni
January 3rd, 2013
10:16 am
Leggs you hit the nail on the head!!!
DuShawn- Many men like to discuss things as well, for example SPORTS and ANYTHING related to sports! So how come these same men get quiet when it comes to talking to their woman? It’s a choice and overall we have to choose to communicate and if we’re not good at it, again we have to choose to do better. It’s not that difficult.
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
10:20 am
DuS – Well what’s up with men IGNORNING issues or things going on? Just because you don’t talk about it, doesn’t mean it goes away.
Lee
January 3rd, 2013
10:33 am
Doubts we all have them about many different things. Regret we all have it, but i don’t regret the people in my life or those who are no longer in it , because of them i am stronger and i hope i became wiser for it. I try not to say “what if” those are dangerous words –they hold you back.
Another long day.. ugh hurry up friday.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
10:34 am
what’s up D? I understand that a few overly chatty chicks have ruined things for all of us. the ones who – like you say – want to discuss every dayum thing. lol. personally, I’m not for all the idle chit chat anyway. yep. this coming from a bonafide mouthpiece. still, as much as I talk I hate to listen to other folks talk about nothing, especially men. so, if you just talking to make sounds you might as well hush. I’ve always liked the “strong silent type” anyway. can’t stand a yapping azz man. and please don’t get him to yapping about his feelings and whatnot. ugh.
abc
January 3rd, 2013
10:36 am
Men typically resist discussions that are about issues with no resolution. Men want to fix it and move on, not talk and talk and talk, share feelings, blah blah. Chicks are like that, not men. If you feel the need to endlessly discuss, and the man doesn’t want to talk about that anymore, then yeah, probably time to pay attention to any doubts you may have.
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
10:36 am
Good morning all!!!
Leggs – I’m right there with you. I’ve had two exes who would do mean things and not own up to it and say “I can’t control how you feel.” I would yell back that they are the ones who did something to make me feel that way. That was the most frustrating thing. Yes…you can control how you make me feel by doing the right things. When you do me wrong, you can bet that I’m gonna be hurt/mad/upset…
abc
January 3rd, 2013
10:39 am
The other person is responsible for their actions, not your reactions. How you react is your own business and has nothing to do with them. They are not liable.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
10:41 am
Disco, when I say talk about any and everything I mean things that have to do with our relationship, nothing more. If you’re holding back to protect someones feelings, maybe you shouldn’t be in a relationship, because most people get made what they were holding back to protect ends up getting said to hurt!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
10:43 am
Moni…..Believe me, I get it. Women enjoy discussing their feelings, the direction of their relationships and a host of other annoying topics. So as a man, if you want to keep your woman happy, you have to become skilled in pretending that you are interested. Most men are of the mindset that if my undivided attention and enthusiastic participation in a discussion on the subject of her choosing, is the price I have to pay for some solitude, the remote, a sandwich and some sex, I’m willing to make that sacrifice. In other words, open lines of communication are a necessary, albeit often uncomfortable, part of a successful union. Just like a janitor cleaning toilets……its part of the job.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
10:45 am
ABC if you’re discussing and not fixing, what’s the point?
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
10:48 am
abc – I didn’t think women discussed things for the sake of talking. At least as far as i’m concerned, me bringing up anything in a serious discussion is because I’m seeking to first let you know my issue, problem, or whatever…then i’m wanting to know your take on said items, then ultimately, seeking resolution or game plan to make it better to address it. If the things are tended to, then there is no need to bring it up again outside of saying, Hey babe, i’m sooo glad we were able to fix/address/edit/change xyz…i appreciate you taking heed to my needs/concerns.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
10:53 am
abc – I cosign your 10:39. my momma told me when I was a wee little thing that she didn’t give a dang about my feelings and that my feelings were my problem. i can hear her now “sounds like a personal problem to me”. needless to say to me hurt feelings are a joke. not saying a person’s feelings can’t be hurt. just saying they need to deal with it without whining like little beeyotches.
s/h – of course I (me, myself personally – lol) don’t hold back to protect feelings. just saying that some do, or at least that’s the excuse they use. me, I don’t give a hoot about your feelings. some people do. blame it on my momma.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
10:55 am
I could be wrong but I don’t think the men are tripping off of women discussing valid situations. I think the men are fussing about women who want to come home and talk about the chick at work they can’t stand or the bad service they got at the salon or whatever all else that the man really doesn’t care about but has to pretend to care about so as not to get denied nighttime favors. lol.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
10:56 am
disco, why did the image of cat woman come into my mind, I could just picture you in black leather with the whip standing over some man daring him to cry!!
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
10:58 am
Disco, I’m not going to pretend I care about that isht, if you come home and won’t to tell you about your horrible day everyday, you either need to find a new whatever or stfu!
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
10:59 am
want to tell I mean
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
11:06 am
abc – I disagree…when you do something wrong to hurt someone, you are responsible for their hurt feelings or their anger. Especially if you purposely did something that you knew would hurt her…
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
11:06 am
“….talk about the chick at work they can’t stand or the bad service they got at the salon” -disco- Actually, those frivolous types of discussions are the kind most men prefer. Those are easy to fake. The hard ones are the ones that start out “let’s talk about us”. That’s when the man thinks to himself “aww sh&*t, here we go with this again…dayum! Now imma actually have to listen, she bout to ask me how I feel…f&*ck!!”
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
11:10 am
“How you react is your own business and has nothing to do with them. They are not liable.” – Cool.
You break into my home, attempt to rape one of my guest, I shoot you in the head, but my reaction has nothing to do with what you did. Cool, you’re dead and it’s all your fault!
disco
January 3rd, 2013
11:12 am
dushawn – granted but that’s only because what she’s talking about isn’t what you are trying to hear at the time. I think it’s the same. men want to talk about what’s important (to them). it’s why women can sit and talk on the phone with friends for hours about nothing and men call each other and give the important details (who what where when, they don’t even cover why) and be done. I think a grown man will sit and take part in a serious discussion. the key is whether or not what old girl is trying to discuss is important to him.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
11:12 am
Extreme example, but “reaction” and “liability” goes across the board. Doesn’t rest solely with relationships.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
11:13 am
Leggs, why they got to attempt to rape someone, if you break into my home you’ve already done too much. And it is all your fault!!
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:15 am
Morning Blog Peeps!!
In the past, when I had doubts about the relationship I was in, I absolutely hated it. I am not much of a talker about feelings and such, unlike “most” women, as you guys say. I have a tendency to be a worrier and keep things in, so my mind would be killing me with my doubts. They would force me to go ahead and take action.
Women enjoy discussing their feelings, the direction of their relationships
This has NEVER been me! I am sort of like a guy when it comes to talking about such. Big issues, sure, but even those I like to have a plan of action or solution right away. Otherwise, I don’t need to constantly talk about stuff with my man. Either I’m feeling you or I’m not, either we’re moving forward with things or we’re not. No need to beat it to death. Me & hubs didn’t even do the pre-marital counseling. He’s a psych major and thinking about going and getting his Ph D in it, but even he isn’t that “let’s discuss things all the time” type!
I say all that, but yes it is frustrating dealing with someone that expects you to read their mind or tries to play games with yours. Slim, per your 9:27, that’s a game dudes like to play. And don’t do the pouting thing with me either. Either tell me what’s going on or leave. It’s just that simple with me. I don’t even deal with pouting children, much less a grown A man!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
11:15 am
disco- 11:12..agreed. Girl you know you can say the right things. Sometimes I think you trying to pull a real ninja out of cyberspace.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
11:16 am
I don’t have a problem if you want to talk about something with our relationship, but I also believe in the time to start fixing it is right then. If we have to discuss it more than 3 times, Houston we have a problem!!
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
11:17 am
” the key is whether or not what old girl is trying to discuss is important to him.” – along with whether what she’s saying is so preposterous to him that he enjoys holding moot court simply in an attempt to prove her wrong. He’s no longer interested in the topic at hand.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
11:18 am
Single ~ just wanted to throw fuel on an already existing fire. To say someone’s reaction is there’s alone is so untrue!
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
11:20 am
Single, I get it’s my fault, it was done by my hand. Yet, my reaction is a direct correlation to your action. Without your hand in my reaction, nothing would have occurred. The end result is done by my hand, but your hand was there stirring the pot.
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
11:21 am
Women are just emotionally vane if not emotionally flamboyant.
If u want to make them ‘happy’,talk adnauseaum about how u luv her the house u want to build for her,the jewelry u plan to buy her,all the diamonds she deserves and how u are going to be making her breakfast in bed till death do us part. When u take her somewhere and u arrive maybe her friends are there watching as u two get outta the car,u go around to open her door,she’s looking fly and all the other females there are gasping ‘he luvs her,my…wish it was me!’
That is what makes a woman perpetually,constantly..Always Happy
When u Focus on her and talk about u and HER ALWAYS!
…….. YAWN!
(boiled egg fart)
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:22 am
Disco – Some stuff I just bounce off of my girlfriends and not my man. It’s not even that I think he won’t be interested, he just won’t “get it” like my girlfriends will, especially if it’s concerning another woman. Now stuff like folks I can’t stand at work or bad service – well both me & hubs exchange stuff like that. It’s just general talk and usually it’s either something funny or unique. Nothing my hubs would be rolling his eyes and saying “here it comes again” when I start to tell him.
Robert
January 3rd, 2013
11:24 am
My woman brought up this subject “we need to talk” over the holiday’s. I shut-uped and listen to her carefully and answer all her questions truthfully. For example;
Question – Where were you last night? Answer – Sleep.
Question – What time did you go to sleep? Answer – Early.
Question – When will I see you? Answer – Tomorrow night.
Question – Where is this relationship going? Answer – Someday marriage.
Question – Are you in love with me? Answer – Yes, I am. A lucky man.
Question – Are we getting married soon? Answer – Yes, I dream about you.
Question – Can we go to the jewelry store? Answer-Yes,buy diamond ring.
My woman only wants – A Very Happy Ending for 2013.
Single and Happy
January 3rd, 2013
11:26 am
Leggs, I meant it’s the dead guys fault, had you not broke into my house, I wouldn’t have blown your brains out!
Relationships are different.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:29 am
Leggs – I don’t even get into that “I’m not responsible for another person’s feelings” thought process with folks. Life is just not cut and dry like that and they know it. Usually when a person comes across like that, it’s a mind game and I refuse to play.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
11:32 am
leggs – re that 11:10. yep. they are dead and it’s all their fault.
D – hush. I just got my PhD in man-ology. lol.
hey kimmie!!!
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:34 am
When will I see you?
The thought that a woman would lower herself to ask a man this question grates at my nerves. No pride or self-esteem at all. Heck, if anything he should be asking me that and all those questions!
I just don’t believe in chasing or running down a man. Call me old school, I don’t care.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:35 am
Hey Disco!!
disco
January 3rd, 2013
11:37 am
kimmie – I can see that mentality/perspective being a mind game. especially when guys use it since they are banking on women being emotional beings. for me though, it’s not game. I was just raised to be responsible for my own feelings so I expect other people to be responsible for theirs. a chick accused me of hurting her feelings about a year or so ago with something I said to her. my response was a cut and dry grow the eff up. respect the truth. what I said was either the truth or a lie. deal with it and quit whining about your daggone feelings. that irks me right up there with tears. no coincidence the two often go hand in hand. lol.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
11:53 am
Disco – I can’t stand whiners either. I am teaching my girly-girl daughter to not be whiny and play that helpless female role. That’s why alot of women have trouble getting respect in the workplace and then they put all women in that category, like some men do with women in relationships. Thinking we are all overly emotional.
Having said that, a slip of the lip can sink a ship. I don’t believe in being crude, tactless and just saying the first thing that comes to mind, even if it is the truth. Once it’s out there, it can’t be taken back. I would almost rather a person outwardly shows that I’ve hurt them with something I’ve said. When they don’t say anthing or you see the hurt in the eyes of someone you love or you find out later how much it affected them, it’s not worth it to me.
SlimNu - More of me, less of you
January 3rd, 2013
12:00 pm
Are we equating having discussions about issues/concerns in a relationship, with being “over-emotional, damsel in distress whiners”??
disco
January 3rd, 2013
12:01 pm
kimmie – well the chick I hurt wasn’t a loved one. she was nothing to me. a mouthpiece who could dish it but couldn’t take it. to heck with her and her punk azz feelings. lol.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
12:05 pm
disco – Oh, one of those! Carry on, then! LOL!!
Slim – The dudes equated the two, you know they always go there!
disco
January 3rd, 2013
12:11 pm
kimmie – yep. carry on I would. I don’t mind calling somebody out. too many folks walking around unchecked. that’s what’s wrong with the world today. okay. I’m being silly.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
12:21 pm
kimmie – I just had a whole flashback in my mind re that situation. grown woman not just with hurt feelings but a grown woman with hurt feelings running around telling folks I hurt her feelings. really? please grow up. someone had the nerve to ask me to apologize to her. I’m like gtfoh. I wish I would. she ended up coming to me crying, snotting and apologizing to me.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
12:25 pm
Gotcha, Single!
kimmie ~ wish more would be old school. I know I am….you can’t pursue a man that doesn’t appear to be pursuing you. Yet women do it all day, everyday! Sorry to bring this up as an example, but take Kenya Moore (RHOA), that’s one thirsty woman who is having a conversation with herself although her supposedly boyfriend is sitting beside her. She keeps saying “we discussed this, or that” when in actuality she’s discussing what she wants and he’s looking at her like she’s a distressed signal.
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
12:29 pm
I’m not hanging on or around any one I have doubts about. If I have doubts, I’m talking…period, point blank. I’m not asking “can we talk”, we’re gonna talk. Once I lay whatever my issues are on the table, either we address or we walk away. I though, am not going to play games. I’m not bringing up anything petty, so if I have an issue it’s legit. And if you have issues, doubts or concerns about me and my role or places where you feel there’s slack on my part, I’ll give the same amount of attention and respect in hearing you out. All this other talk on trying to validate whether it’s a real issues or not, blah blah blah, I’m not hearing that. If there’s a cause or concern, then (in my world) it’s real and vice versa for you. So, we talk. Get it out there, address and hopefully move on.
I’m responsible for my feelings and you for yours. It’s enough trying to relate and maintain (speaking in general), I’m certainly not going to take on making sure I carry your feelings. Naw, you carry yours and I’ll carry mine. If you’re doing things that may hurt my feelings, I’ll speak up. If it’s not worth it for you to fix (and again vice versa), well I would be a dummy and a glutton to hang around for that. Again, we talk about and work to resolve. If we can’t, I’m not gonna keep saying to you, “you’re upsetting me” or “you’re hurting my feelings”…..ah, yeah you ought to with some petty adolescent BS like that…IJS I take my ball and go home
No shame in showing my back as I step through the door. The only shame is tolerating.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
12:32 pm
Post 100% on point, Celisea!
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
12:33 pm
Leggs – Thanks
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
12:37 pm
you can’t pursue a man that doesn’t appear to be pursuing you.
Sure can’t…and won’t either
abc
January 3rd, 2013
12:50 pm
Consider it like this, Bluz: my girl cheats, hits it with some other guy. She’s responsible for her own actions. She is not responsible for my reactions, though. If I have hurt feelings, those are mine, not hers; if I cut her loose on account of it, my call, not hers; if I harbor resentment it about it, that’s all on me, not on her. I have the choice on my own whether to not concern myself with the actions or inactions of someone; I will (or should) have learned that I’ve misplaced my trust, and move on the wiser.
Suppose she raided my bank account, sold my car, emptied out the house and moved in with the pastor. Same deal: she owns what she did, but I own how I feel, not her. Be responsible for yourself, not reliant upon others to foot the credit or the blame.
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
12:51 pm
I will say this and get on back to work….
Kenya is trashy…IMO. She’s that chick that’s made me feel more empathy for men than I’ve felt my lifetime…lololol. Laying heavily on “wanting to get married.” If that dude ain’t feeling mariage, he should be man enough to tell her, in plain english. She’s delusional and apparently most of the stuff she hears, is lost in translation. To boot, she’s bugging that dude to death about marriage but in front of him, disrespecfully shaking her tail and flirting with other folks’ husbands. Call me an alleybat cause Idda beat the breaks off of her, if it were me she asked (like she did another wife) if I could give two best friends to my man, who would it be???? Heck naw!! And for shaking her tail on the other chicks hub’s groin area? Three words….SIX FEET UNDER…IJS Somebody needs to tell her, “ummm, we don’t play like that.”
The hubs that didn’t “move out of the way” when she was shaking her tail and the hubs that grab her by the butt (literally) and tossed her in the pool would have some SERIOUS “splaining” to do.
I’on play with women that bring that kind of foolishness.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
12:59 pm
She’s delusional and apparently most of the stuff she hears, is lost in translation. – Bottom line!!! With her rubbing on the groin of that man simply illustrated that her and Walter are not dating. Two ways a woman in her right mind would blatantly disrespect their mate is (1) she no longer considers him her mate or (2) she sees him as a “wuss/punk” not fearing a beat down!!!
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
1:03 pm
And equally, I’on play with dudes that tolerate that kind of foolishess!!
Y’all have yourselves a good one
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
1:17 pm
abc – If I do something purposefully to hurt you, then I take responsibility for how I made you feel. Yes…you choose how you want to react or feel, but I made you feel that way. I cheated on you, so it is my fault that you are hurt…
abc
January 3rd, 2013
1:26 pm
Nope, not so much. My feelings are my problem. Now, you’d probably not get the time of day from me after that, but that’s on me, too. The only alternative is to give other people, likely ones that don’t give a flip about you really, control of your feelings, and control over you and your life. If someone wants to assign that to me, not my problem, it’s theirs, and vice-versa.
So, victim of others, are you? Hm.
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
1:29 pm
I guess we’ll just agree to disagree…I don’t get how you cannot be held responsible for making someone feel like isht…
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
1:39 pm
Bluz, I suppose it goes along with the argument of “free will.” You don’t have to act a fool if you don’t want to, no matter how much isht is thrown in your face!” I’m with you, agree to disagree.
abc
January 3rd, 2013
1:41 pm
Whether they feel good or bad is their own choice. I don’t have a guilt complex, I don’t try to impose one on others, I don’t let anyone impose that upon me, and I take responsibility for the way I feel — I choose to feel fine. I am ALWAYS fine. If the waters get choppy, my boat is still smooth sailing. Granted, I had to learn to be that way when I was young.
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
1:42 pm
I think Kenya is ‘acting’ and if so,she is acting good..same as the supposed boyfriend.
But I I agree with Leggs on the point about her acting or not.
Such women are just pityful!
@Celisea..I agree too on ur observation
The problem tho for most women is that men bottle up or keep their emotions in check so much so that a woman that ‘likes’ to hear validation is left in limbo…no wonder the ‘let’s talk’ talk.
A man can be doing Everything right but as long as he does not verbalize his emotions often,even the mundane,’ I luv u’,most women develop angst.
And that angst,from a female standpoint maybe valid.
Coz a man can be doing All the necessary ‘obligations’ for his girl but may not marriage. He won’t mouth nothing.
And if u are continuing to give him that ’sexual narcotic’, some men are content with that.
And he continues footing the ‘obligations’
But emotionally she is kept in abeyance.
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
1:43 pm
may not want marriage
disco
January 3rd, 2013
2:22 pm
abc – even though folks have already agreed to disagree I’m on your side with that one.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
2:30 pm
Leggs – Did you hear any of the Bert Show this morning? Jeff was talking about his frustration with “dating” if that’s what he calls it. He said since he went thru the divorce last year and is training for the marathon, he does not want to pursue a relationship or really date anyone regularly. But of course, he does want sex from time to time. He said he invites women to “hang out” and tells them up front he is not looking to date right now. He says they seem to not hear him and get disappointed when he does not call or ask them out again even though they both seem to have a good time. All the women he described seem like nice women, but of course they are not giving up the sex either. Bert said many men are just like him – say they are not looking to date until they meet that “One’ that causes them to change their mind. They then make the time for that woman and all women think they will be the one to change his mind. He just couldn’t see it. The whole time I’m thinking, why go thru all that? Just find someone you can be FWB with and leave it at that!!!
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
2:33 pm
If the Waters get Choppy,my boat is still smooth sailing.
Good one abc!
Ima steal that line…damn it’s good!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
2:33 pm
why go thru all that? Just find someone you can be FWB with and leave it at that!!!
True…that way there would be less hurt feelings. Even then it has the potential to go awry b/c someone may catch feelings but at least find someone you’re on the same page with.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
2:36 pm
kimmie ~ I heard all of that and couldn’t understand why Jeff was confused. You don’t want a steady girl, but you want sex. Get a FWB type of woman or pay for sex. One or the other. Because a woman is not going to sleep with you “knowing” you’re not interested in having a relationship. That’s why we now have a label = FWB!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
2:37 pm
Ms. new booty has been in my colleague’s office all day training. He was pushed into the role and keeps looking at me like, “why don’t you show her something for awhile, I need a break”. I’m tempted to tell her to cum in my office and get on my lap……top. (as I was typing this, baby walked in and struck up a conversation, I had to minimize my screen before she saw this sh&*t…lol)
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
2:38 pm
I am ALWAYS fine. If the waters get choppy, my boat is still smooth sailing. The only way your boat is sailing smoothly is if you’re navigating a different body of water! But wait we are in Atlanta where it can rain on one side of the street. Guess that’s the same as being in a one-sided relationship!
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
2:41 pm
just find someone u can FWB with….
there is no ’spice’ there for a man,a divorced one at that.
In other news,Queen just broke to me that she got a new job promo in same company.
I think ima have to fortify my back coz the sex tonite and next few weeks is jes gon be off da meter…
I think I need some of those label enhancer pills,’hard rock’,'All niter’, ‘Pummel It’ etc
Any suggestions fellas ?
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
2:42 pm
And if u are continuing to give him that ’sexual narcotic’, some men are content with that.
And he continues footing the ‘obligations’
Exiled – Your post above describes the type of women and men we come back and discuss on the blog when we run across them. Women that wait around forever, years on end, hoping such dudes will suddenly one day have an epiphany and see what a great woman they have and come on bended knee with that ring. We dog him, but he’s only done what he’s allowed to do. Some may even throw her under the bus and say if he’s giving her everything but marriage why should she let such a “good man” go? Bottom line, I don’t care how much he keeps things “bottled up” inside, at some point he needs to put his grown man drawers on and be straight with that woman on what he wants or doesn’t want. It won’t require a long, drawn out convo, just yay or nay. Give her a chance to decide what she wants to do and DON’T get financially entangled with each other.
It’s real simple, but folks try to make it hard!!
abc
January 3rd, 2013
2:43 pm
Depends on the size of your boat, just sayin
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
2:45 pm
Cute, abc.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
2:46 pm
Exiled – Yeah, he can go ahead and pay the price for “spice” or he can pursue the path of least resistance. Problem is, he wants his cake and eat it too.
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
2:48 pm
“….you’re navigating a different body of water!”I kind of agree with Leggs. It’s easy to dismiss another’s discontent if you care nothing about them, but if it makes you happy to see them happy, you will figure out a way calm those choppy waters so you both could sail smoothly.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
2:55 pm
Du & Leggs – I agree. If you don’t care, you’re each navigating a different body of water.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
2:57 pm
You got it, DuShawn. All this spin on words reeks of selfishness. If you care, both will find a way to sail smoothly. If not, date yourself, love yourself and stand at the stern of your boat all by your dayum self (lol).
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
2:59 pm
Kimmie…even for Jeff,who I think is in his 40s,the spice will wear off after a couple of weeks..
Spice is really for younger adults.
The old cats will do with a FWB and I’m sure Jeff is going to go that route,assuming he does not want to remarry.
If mine don’t work out that’s the route I will go..maybe even keep her in-house.
There are so many women out there who pine to call a man,’my man’,living in same house,or hus regular steady, even when not married legally.
For a single, old cat,regular pudy and no encumbrance,walk in and out when the man wants,is All that one asks for!
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
3:01 pm
Just regular steady
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
3:03 pm
For a single, old cat,regular pudy and no encumbrance,walk in and out when the man wants,is All that one asks for! – I would tend to agree, but don’t forget to look at the woman that allows that to occur! That old cat got him some old puddy, really old!
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:12 pm
just find someone u can FWB with….
there is no ’spice’ there for a man,a divorced one at that. – Exiled this is what you said first.
…even for Jeff,who I think is in his 40s,the spice will wear off after a couple of weeks..
Spice is really for younger adults. – And this is what you said next!!!
You are confusing me, Exiled!! But either way, some men never outgrow the spice! That’s why some have a hard time maintaing a monogamous relationship. Always looking for something new to provide the spice instead of making the spice with the one he’s already got. I just couldn’t understand his confusion. If any of these women he’s meeting and going out with have even an ounce of self-esteem, unless they too are looking for a FWB situation, their reaction to him should be a given.
abc
January 3rd, 2013
3:21 pm
Situations like these will almost always involve someone ending the relationship, in my opinion, either deliberately and intentionally, or due to exhibiting behavior that indicates strongly that they really don’t care about the other’s feelings — or, their own wishes supercede such concern.
Case in point: some years back I was dating a girl who was convinced that we were going to be married. This is in spite of my protesting that all we ever did was fight and argue over stuff she started. Then she’d want to talk about it to convince me that I was the big problem and I should change all that, which I was not really all that willing to discuss after awhile. So, I told her, that’s that. She’s heartbroken and it’s all my fault she’s so unhappy. I start seeing other people, that makes it worse for her and blah blah blah.
No, it wasn’t my fault she felt so bad. She wanted to talk it all over some more and I wouldn’t, she feels awful and it’s my fault? I don’t think so. I should feel some remorse because it’s over? More like I felt relief. Her reactions were absolutely not my problem. Her waters were choppy because she churned them up herself. Or maybe it was the result of my wake. Whatever, still not my problem.
Now, if she had taken responsibility for her own feelings and stopped blaming me for them, her world could have been a nice, serene place, no matter what I did or didn’t do. Rather than selfishly insisting on getting her way on her terms or else she’ll throw a fit, making herself and everyone around her miserable (her standard behavior anyway), she could have seen everything for what it was (and wasn’t) and pressed on. Either way, not my problem.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
3:22 pm
If any of these women he’s meeting and going out with have even an ounce of self-esteem, unless they too are looking for a FWB situation, their reaction to him should be a given.
It definitely should be a given…he probably knows that and said what he did as a form of bait…maybe he’s trying to cast a wide net and see what he catches. Hopefully it won’t be anything he’ll have to go to the doctor for.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
3:24 pm
her world could have been a nice, serene place, no matter what I did or didn’t do. – How is that even possible? Relationships have peaks and valleys, but it’s a “relationship” because it involves more than one person. If you’re with an A-hole how is it nice and serene. It’s only that way once you remove the A-hole, but not while you’re still looking at him.
abc
January 3rd, 2013
3:25 pm
Most guys know that they can just go get laid if that’s what they want. That’s easy. By contrast, finding a woman that you actually want to commit to is like 1 in a million, very hard to find.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
3:25 pm
or her….
abc
January 3rd, 2013
3:27 pm
If you let the a-hole determine how you feel about yourself, it’s your problem, not his. If you project feelings upon the a-hole that aren’t really there, thus resulting in your disappointment, it’s your problem, not his. If the a-hole lies, cheats and steals and you don’t see it, he’s responsible for his behavior, but you’re responsible for how you react. Are you sad, betrayed? You made yourself that way. Are you indignant, indifferent, disconnected, moving on? These are all choices you have to make for youself.
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
3:29 pm
abc – I see your point in that case. What I’m talking about is when you intentionally hurt someone. For example, right before ex and I broke up, he went behind my back and booked a gig with his ex girlfriend (who she and I mutually hate each other). He knew how I would react to that…I was very hurt and angry. He tried to say that he couldn’t help how I felt, but he was the one that did something he shouldn’t have done. That was actually the straw that broke the camel’s back. There were much worse things he did, but tried to blame me for my feelings when he was the one who intentionally did things to hurt me…
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
3:29 pm
“That old cat got him some old puddy, really old!”……..not necessarily, most of my older playa potnah’s will rather waste money than time. I can remember stopping by my dog’s house and he had this fine little chick vacuuming, dusting and folding clothes. Baby had on this tight little outfit, bending over cleaning sh&*t. I told him, I’m having a hard time not staring at her. He replied, “That’s what she here for bruh, look at her.” Point being, my man had put together a situation where his friend would come thru, clean up, break him off if needed, collect her little stipend and get the hell on. As time passed, I got to know her. She wasn’t a hoe or a maid nor did she have self esteem issues. She just dug my dude and knew that was the type of situation that benefited them both. That’s exactly what older cats are looking for. They have done the marriage thing, kids are grown and gone. They are not trying to have a relationship with anyone but themselves.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:29 pm
Most guys know that they can just go get laid if that’s what they want. That’s easy. By contrast, finding a woman that you actually want to commit to is like 1 in a million, very hard to find.
OR:
Most women know that they can just go get laid if that’s what they want. That’s easy. By contrast, finding a man that you actually want to commit to is like 1 in a million, very hard to find.
Bluzgirl
January 3rd, 2013
3:31 pm
abc – are you sure you’re not my ex?
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
3:36 pm
3:12 Kimmie?
I know,I was just being contrarian there to ur point but ’spice’ wears off.
I think.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:38 pm
Dushawn – I’m all about everyone doing what works for them, both of the parties involved. My thing is, don’t act surprised if what you’re selling I don’t want to buy. In my example with Jeff from the Bert Show, he was surprised he wasn’t getting any takers and putting down the women involved. When he needs to be looking for someone on the same page, in the market for what he’s selling. Heck, find another woman that’s recently divorced and focused on her job or some kind of goal she’s trying to focus on other than a relationship.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:41 pm
Exiled – I’m sure it does wear off, get old. Trying to chase that “thrill” constantly, never satisfied, dang I get tired just thinking about it!LOL!!!
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
3:42 pm
Du…I like ur choice of words… 3:29
That 3:29 has me laughing after reading just three lines
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
3:48 pm
Kimmie…”finding a man that you actually want to commit to is like 1 in a million, very hard to find.” You can’t honestly believe the playing fields are level. Men don’t have the societal pressures to be in a relationship nor do we have a biological clock that dictates when we should reproduce. Most women will commit to any dude that they like, with good credit, and a few coins in the bank. It’s not hard for a woman to find a man she actually wants to commit to……Its hard to find one that will ask her.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
3:51 pm
abc ~ when I say A-hole, I’m saying he’s being that way to you. She doesn’t pull his strings making him do what he do, he does it cuz he wants to. In that regard, I’m referencing your “not matter what I did or didn’t do.” If she responds or reacts ok, it’s on her but you being an A-hole in the relationship is on you so you do have a hand in it!
Her reactions are her own, but you can’t overlook the mitigating circumstances.
DuShawn ~ in your example, still goes back to what I was “referring” to. old puddy, really old puddy meant she had low self-respect and would tolerate much of anything, same thing with the young chicken head in your example. Old puddy or new puddy that allows a man to come and go, do what he wants when he wants lacks self-respect!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
3:55 pm
Most women will commit to any dude that they like, with good credit, and a few coins in the bank.
Is that what happened to yoU Du? Do you really think MOST women are that desperate…granted there are BOTH men and women who’ll “settle” because of one reason or another…be it a societal or otherwise. Just because men don’t verbalize it…they too want the same things women want.
Just don’t over generalize us all…
Its hard to find one that will ask her.
I’m just calling B.S. on this one…
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:55 pm
Dushawn – I didn’t say the playing fields were level at all. I’m just saying both genders can say the same exact thing. It’s easy for most to find someone to have sex with. But whether you are doing the asking or waiting to be asked, finding The One, not just the one you settled for, can be difficult.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
3:57 pm
Old puddy or new puddy that allows a man to come and go, do what he wants when he wants lacks self-respect!
Leggs – Bears repeating!!!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
3:57 pm
“……allows a man to come and go, do what he wants when he wants lacks self-respect!” Seriously Leggs!! There are so many things inherently disturbing about that comment, imma leave it alone. Well, I gotta say this……you allow children, not adults.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
3:59 pm
DuShawn ~ forget the word “allow.” I didn’t put the statement out there, just repeating it! Nonetheless, don’t get hung on on the word “allow” and pay attention to the sentiment of the statement. You guys love to act like you have no idea what’s being said!
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:00 pm
What’s disturbing is….awww, nevermind.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:04 pm
You guys love to act like you have no idea what’s being said!
Plain and simple…
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:04 pm
ok, I did use the word “allow.” Nevertheless, allow, tolerate, accept, act deaf and dumt, turn the other cheek, sleep with one eye open one eye closed, whatever word you like….is the point I was making.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:08 pm
Leggs/Sassy – Folks kill me trying to twist words! You know exactly what point is being made!!LOL!!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:13 pm
Folks kill me trying to twist words!
Exactly Kimmie…talk about playing with semantics.
He’s just trying to redirect it but that’s not happening. Maybe on a slower more naive audience that might have some credence. 
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:15 pm
kimmie ~ what’s even funnier is when they actually believe they’ve talked so much and flipped the script so much that we actually forget what we originally started out saying. Men love twisting words and a conveyed thought just as much as women!!!!
disco
January 3rd, 2013
4:17 pm
D – have to beg to differ on that 3:48. unless you are a low level, bottom rung chick where almost everything/every man is a step up that statement is wrong like a mug.
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
4:18 pm
I don’t think it’s lack of self respect
It’s a change in societal standards
Men used to value virgins more..not anymore
Bootey clubs to entertain men…lack of self respect
The list goes on
Nowadays we have a litany of websites devoted to niche relationship/sex folks
Fwb
Just bootey
Match.com
Nothing serious.com
U name it
A young chic bootey shacking to pay for college…lack of self respect
Ummmmm
But I luv it!
When a woman puts on a mini that near revealing her nether is that lack of self respect!?
Bootey clubs…to entertaI
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
4:19 pm
Do you really think MOST women are that desperate -Sassy- No, of course I don’t believe all single women are desperate nor am I suggesting that people should settle. What I am proposing is that it is far easier for a man to find a woman whom is willing to commit than vice versa. Rarely will you hear a dude say he has been in a long term relationship, but she refuses to marry him. Women say it all the time. From Barbie dolls to bridal magazines, women are subliminally conditioned to be in love. It is not my intent to brush all women with the same stroke, but generally speaking this is true.
disco
January 3rd, 2013
4:25 pm
D – I’m with your 4:19. I disagreed with your earlier comment that it’s not hard for a woman to find a man she wants to commit to. as I typed that I had an adverse thought though. lol. some women want to commit to any man that they are with whether he’s worthy or not. in that instance I guess your statement is true. other women have the good sense to try to determine whether or not a man is worth committing to before deciding to be with him. in that case, your statement is not so true.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:25 pm
Exiled – Whether you call it lack of self-respect or different/changed societal standards. each person has to decide for themself what they call it. And if what they call it is acceptable in a mate. You like watching her show her stuff, but you wouldn’t wife her or want your daughter to emulate her. Everyone is entitled to their own point of view.
Just sayin, being a contrarian like you! LOL!!
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:27 pm
I don’t think it’s lack of self respect -
Ex, I beg to differ because whatever relationship you get into almost surely corresponds with your level of respect you have for yourself. Some can tolerate this type, some can tolerate that type, but what one accepts definitely correlates to who they are as a person, a “damaged” person or a “whole/self-assured/confident” person.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:29 pm
Alrighty, kimmie!
disco
January 3rd, 2013
4:30 pm
dag. maybe I should have read ex’s post. I don’t deny that sometimes I just skip right over him. lol.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:32 pm
Dushawn – And actually, here is another play on words. ABC’s original comment, from what I gathered, said it’s easy to find a woman to sleep with, but not one you WANT to actually commit to. Meaning THE ONE, not just “I’m looking for a wife, she’s here, so she’ll do”. Shoot, even dudes in prison manage to find chicks willing to commit to them, but are these same chicks the one they would choose if they had their stuff together and could be more choosy.
Exiled!
January 3rd, 2013
4:32 pm
I don’t want u ladies to call me ‘Judgemental’ ever again coz u being hard on that young Du potnah lady. Lol
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:35 pm
What I am proposing is that it is far easier for a man to find a woman whom is willing to commit than vice versa. Rarely will you hear a dude say he has been in a long term relationship, but she refuses to marry him.
Once again Du..you’re making too general a statement with too broad a paint brush. Unless you can account for ALL men you can’t account for what “rarely” does and doesn’t happen.
It is not my intent to brush all women with the same stroke, but generally speaking this is true.
You’re contradicting yourself…still. Unless you’ve personally surveyed a large enough population of different women then how can you make that claim…it seems almost baseless. Now had you said that some of the women YOU come across have been living the fantasy then that “may” be a little more palatable.
From Barbie dolls to bridal magazines, women are subliminally conditioned to be in love.
And what are men “subliminally conditioned” to do?..are you serious?
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:38 pm
I don’t deny that sometimes I just skip right over him. lol.
Me,too…just ease right on by ‘em most times…
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
4:38 pm
Ex….I agree with u! Why all you blog ladies feel that my potnah’s female friend lacks self respect (one of yall even called her a chicken head) . All she did was clean the house, gave him some puddy and took his money…..Every wife I know does the same thing.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:39 pm
Sassy – I took abc’s original post to mean it’s hard to find QUALITY not QUANTITY. Du is stuck on the quantity part, thus his generalizations!!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
4:40 pm
Sassy – Do me a favor……skip over my post too.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:42 pm
Will do…ever so fervently from here on out..
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
4:42 pm
When a man tells his potnah “that’s what she’s there for, for you to look at” and she continuously bends over pretending to dust under the table, or walk seductively in front of the friend watching him salivate, you damn skippy she’s lacking respect because she’s letting her “man” call the shots and let his potnah oogle her like the piece of meat he thinks she is. She’s only looking after the $$$!
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:43 pm
Du – Sounds like a prostitute that offers extra/add-on services.
If she’s a wife, she’s not taking HIS money, it’s THEIR money.
See, play on words!!
I know your potnah’s situation is probably a lot of men’s dream, but don’t fault us on the other side for not seeing it that way!!LOL!!
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:44 pm
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:45 pm
you damn skippy she’s lacking respect because she’s letting her “man” call the shots and let his potnah oogle her like the piece of meat he thinks she is.
Eeeasy Leggs…that just flew over a few heads just then..
disco
January 3rd, 2013
4:46 pm
D – let me point out that I didn’t comment on that situation. I ain’t mad at her. get yours is all I can say to that. she’s a step ahead of the chick that does it and doesn’t have the good sense to get the money. ijs.
kimmie
January 3rd, 2013
4:49 pm
It’s been fun gang, gotta run!!
DuShawn
January 3rd, 2013
4:51 pm
Some of yall got hand diarrhea…….can’t stop typing bull sh&*t. I can’t lie, I do enjoy reading yall, especially you Sassy. You now have my permission to continue to read me…just don’t respond
. If you talk as much as you type, I know your man keep a migraine. -Disco- you know what it is. Can’t knock her hustle.
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:51 pm
Peace out blog…read y’all tomorrow
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
4:55 pm
Just popped in before heading home….
On Dushawn and his tales…..
And while I don’t “dislike” Dushawn, I disagree with his attitude towards women in general and overall. Because he’s dabbled and dealt with women of a lower caliber over the years, it’s totally unfair to assume all women are dummies or easy or not worth much, etc. It seems there’s such a low low regard from him about women…overall
And really, a man that’s dabbled disrespectfully don’t get off scott free just because you’re the “man” in equation and according to society, in a jacked up man/woman situation, she being the ho is the one relagated to bottom status.
If you ain’t “experienced” with you, the you can’t qualify her as a ho…IJS
Night folks
Sassy Me...Feeling like New ;-)
January 3rd, 2013
4:55 pm
I do enjoy reading yall, especially you Sassy.
Cosign…you’re fun to read,too.
You now have my permission to continue to read me…just don’t respond
What if I do…Who gone check me boo?!
Okay now I’m out…
Celisea....renewed and rejuvenated
January 3rd, 2013
4:57 pm
If you ain’t “experienced” hoe-dom with all women, then you don’ get to quality the rest as hoes…is what I meant…annnnnd IJS
So, I will be, get and stay scarce cause I don’t do folks that can’t respect women.
Now…I’m out
abc
January 3rd, 2013
4:59 pm
Now, some chicks — lots of them, really — absolutely love being the object of male attention without regard for any notion of anything else. They just want it such that when they walk into a room, everyone looks at them and considers them the hottest thing there. It’s not unusual. I think they may put a little too much importance on it — it’s not as if a man will throw down whatever on account of it — but, if that’s what they want and like, so be it. They’re not much concerned with what a bunch of other chicks think about it, that’s for sure.
I knew a guy once that advertised for a maid with benefits. He got almost a hundred applicants, and that was down in middle GA. If that works for them, rock on.
Leggs
January 3rd, 2013
5:06 pm
“everyone looks at them and considers them the hottest thing there. It’s not unusual. I think they may put a little too much importance on it — it’s not as if a man will throw down whatever on account of it —”
Elliott Spitzer, married men now finding themselves divorced, Bill Clinton, etc. Hell if you can put the Presidency on the line, you’ll thrown down “whatever” on account of it – Real talk!!!!