In his new book, It’s Complicated (But It Doesn’t Have to Be), my buddy Paul Carrick Brunson actually titled a chapter “Butt Pads Have to Come Off” and yes I giggled like a 3rd grader.
We have all been guilty of “playing up our strengths” and “putting our best foot forward” when we first meet someone. Unfortunately, some people take it too far. I always make a point to have brunch with a new guy I am dating. I secretly call it my Diva-light Brunch (shut up, it’s cute).
I purposely dress down, wear no makeup, and show up barely looking presentable. I do this because as much as I love to go all glam and girly, I want the guy I marry to know the real me. The me that gets cranky in the mornings (most?). The real me that hates being ignored but does not jockey for attention. The real me who hates wearing uncomfortable shoes for countless hours. That is the me he is obligated to love too, right?
I have heard that men sometimes wonder who is really underneath all the hair extensions, makeup, butt pads, push up bras, and Pollyanna personality. The woman they see in the early stages of dating is who they like, but who will they love? The sooner a woman shows her vulnerable, stripped down, unsavory flaws, the better they seem to feel about going to the next level with her.
Even though it is scary and slightly terrifying to let your guard down, eventually you have to take the butt pads off people! What kind of butt pads do you have to take off so people see the real you?
How long does it take before you are supremely comfortable with the person you are dating?
How do you know when the butt pads are off – and things get REAL?
P.S. For the record? I do not own, nor have I ever worn butt pads. Just sayin’
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog