Should you unlearn some behavior?
I had a long talk with a guy friend about his constant dishonesty with women. He admits that his motivation to mislead women is rooted in deep distrust – mostly unwarranted. I was surprised to hear that he learned this from his own father. He has always believed that lying to women was basically part of being a real man.
He says things like “need to know basis” or “I tell her what I want her to know” all the time. Then is genuinely shocked when his flings or relationships don’t last. This made me think about the many attitudes, and ideas we have about love and relationships are learned from what we have seen or heard from other people. It can be a dangerous trend, though – especially when our behavior is shaped by them.
Do you ever wonder if there are some dating habits you need to unlearn? What about some of your attitudes or behaviors about the opposite sex? Are they informed by your own experiences or from others?
Do you remember that little kid Kenny from The Cosby Show that had jacked up ideas about gender roles from his big brother? I told my friend he was Kenny. Kenny was a kid, what’s his excuse?
Happy Monday!
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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316 comments Add your comment
Jira
December 17th, 2012
5:04 pm
Often lurks…but I must say, Celisea you do take a special interest in many of Dushawn’s rendevouz (past and present)…and that’s cool. But if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re somewhat fascinated by the debaucherous escapades. LoL
He and the Mrs. are clearly “swingin”…a mutual agreement between the two – otherwise she wouldn’t be down. Afterall not everyone can roll with their system.
Sassy Me...Juicy Fruit ;-)
December 17th, 2012
5:04 pm
Great discussion (at least I think so) today.
It was Celi…
this thing is addictive…must go home….
Dani
December 17th, 2012
5:06 pm
Single- I know it was joke, just didn’t want the vultures circling around..lol
Single & Happy
December 17th, 2012
5:07 pm
you talking bout home made meal, lunch and sex (LOL) yea we circling (LOL)
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:08 pm
Jira – Okay…lol If you say so, but again I don’t get down like that. I rarely speak to DuShawn. But, if you saaaay soooo
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:08 pm
Sassy – We should do it again tomorrow. It is addictive….night
Single & Happy
December 17th, 2012
5:09 pm
WTH check out this story
http://www.yourjewishnews.com/Pages/23463.aspx
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:10 pm
Jira – Are you interested in what I’m interested in? I’m just saying, you watchng me? I can’t do swingers or swinging. My heart ain’t out for that…lololol Is that your thing?
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:11 pm
Hey Jira – One more, I don’t do debauchery…unless it’s done on me…and me alone, by him and him alone
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:11 pm
Yaaaaay, seven pages!! Woo hoo
Jira
December 17th, 2012
5:27 pm
Celisea, my decision to speak up on this particular observation does not serve as confirmation of my sexual preferences and such speculation will not keep me from voicing my own perspective from time to time.
I’m simply all for consenting adults being honest enough to simply state and follow through with what they themselves take pleasure in, not based on the judgments of the masses who are one relationship away from resigning themselves to the daily use of KY jelly & blow up dolls. But again, whatever blows your/ their skirt(s).
But please don’t gas yourself anymore than you already have, my dear…I read everyone. The man seemed to be on to something with his previous conclusion. And though some of his views may be skewed to some degree, I can always appreciate a person’s honesty.
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:36 pm
Heeeey, where’s my post to Jira???
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:37 pm
Since my post was eaten, I’ll just bold this —> But please don’t gas yourself anymore than you already have, my dear and chaulk it up to some fan that’s always tailing me.
Night boo boo
Celisea
December 17th, 2012
5:40 pm
Oh, and this….which I found hilarious
I’m simply all for consenting adults being honest enough to simply state and follow through with what they themselves take pleasure in, not based on the judgments of the masses who are one relationship away from resigning themselves to the daily use of KY jelly & blow up dolls. But again, whatever blows your/ their skirt(s).
Night….again
sideeye
December 17th, 2012
6:16 pm
1 dude = 4 or 5 monikers….hmmmmm
LOL
December 17th, 2012
6:48 pm
u noticed 2?!?!?