Do women prefer to be dominated?
I once heard a woman say that dating a man that allows her to walk all over him can be a major turn off. While she wants a nice guy, she does not want a doormat. She prefers a man that can exert some dominance over her and won’t let her get away with anything.
I can see her point when she refers to not dating a doormat, but wanting a man to dominate you seems like a slippery slope. What kind of boundaries would you want to have? How do you know when the man’s dominance goes beyond a “healthy” dominance and gets eerily close to the scary kind?
I am not referring to the sexy Christian Grey/Anastasia kind of arrangement, here. (I am sorry for making a Fifty Shades of Gray reference, forgive me?) I am talking about having an adult relationship with one dominating partner – the man, having most of the power in a relationship.
Ladies, do you think that you prefer some degree of dominance over you? Would you get bored by a man that “let’s you walk all over him?”
Men – in your experience, do you get a favorable response when you exert your masculine energy in a relationship?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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289 comments Add your comment
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
3:42 pm
Robert ~ you didn’t say anything we don’t already know, but thanks!
swiss ~ I see we said the same thing at 3:38. Yes sir!
Exiled!
December 5th, 2012
3:42 pm
About to come out
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
3:45 pm
Ex, I’m not saying never ever either, but I can say it aint going to happen while she’s behind bars.
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
3:46 pm
Martha Stewart is a dateable felon
Exiled – Dang, I keep forgetting Martha went to prison!! Now THAT is a different case right there.
i'm swiss
December 5th, 2012
3:46 pm
Leggs — I know, right? I mean, the b!tch was definitely wrong for that, but anybody stupid enough to fall into that trap kinda has it coming…
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
3:48 pm
Okay I might have dated inside Martha, as long as I had the unlimited cash flow (LOL)
Jake-SPJTWB
December 5th, 2012
3:48 pm
I am sure today has been interesting and ya’ll prolly off topic, but of course she want man who will put his foot down and tell her to shut-up every now and then.
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
3:50 pm
Yes, they do, swiss! That’s my take as well. You clearly see the bottle with the skull and bones on it and you drink from it anyway…you might as well say that’s what he did. Horny, Greed and macho man syndrome always lead to disaster, or in this case, jail.
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
3:51 pm
In regards to not knowing about what goes on behind closed doors (trying to catch up), several people were surprised with the Ex and I broke up. In public, we looked like the happy, perfect couple. But behind closed doors, it was a whole different story.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 5th, 2012
3:51 pm
I’m not going to prison or getting in trouble for any dude, ain’t that much love in the world.
Cosign on that,too. No man is worth my freedom. I was watching “Women Behind Bars” and saw a woman get 12 years so her boyfriend wouldn’t get locked up again. I can’t do it…I might love you but I love me waaay more..
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
3:52 pm
Oh…and I just saw the reference to “Locked Up.” Ex was featured in an episode of “Locked Up Abroad”! LOL! I thought it had changed him for the better and it did for a while, but then he turned into the same ole user/loser/jerk!
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
3:54 pm
Man or woman, I’m not taking the charge. I’m not even going to take it for my own child.
disco
December 5th, 2012
3:54 pm
kimmie – re old girl still looking 12. I have a cousin like that. she’s around 40, has several children, wears a size zero and still looks exactly like she did when we were teenagers.
Exiled!
December 5th, 2012
3:55 pm
Kimmie…being lonely is a biastch,can be very depressing indeed.
And mist of these folks who date prisoners are proly in bad psychological or emotional situations
It can start with an accepted collect call from someone in prison and they offer good talk and companionship
Then you get to like them,they open up are seemingly contrite about their crime.
Then the rest is history!
It’s the same way playas bang good upstanding chics!
Women aren’t difficult to woo if a man zeros on their inner emotional spots.
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
3:56 pm
Leggs – I know that’s right, my mom used to tell us all the time she was not taking the rap for any of us! She & daddy might have hired us the best attorney they could, but that’s about it!!
Jake-SPJTWB
December 5th, 2012
3:57 pm
Wait, what?? Bluz…your ex was on Locked up Abroad.
For Real
December 5th, 2012
3:57 pm
Blog ladies would you expect your man to take a bullet for you?
Celisea
December 5th, 2012
3:59 pm
I’m having a time keeping up, being in and out.
Did I miss something or did Robert talk about him prison stint??
Sassy’s 3:38 lololol
disco
December 5th, 2012
4:00 pm
for real – would I expect it? no. would I appreciate it? of course. now I can’t have a man using me as a human shield either though. he ducking and dodging and trying to hold me out in front. no haps.
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
4:01 pm
Exiled- About accepting those collect calls:
Tom Joyner had Jesse Jackson on talking about how much phone companies charge prisoners for those calls in some states. It’s only like 2 phone companies that are contracted to prisons so they have a monopoly. I think GA is one that charges $15 a minute or something crazy like that and there were states that charged even more. Jesse said they were being ripped off and it should be looked into, but I don’t feel sorry for them. Just another price to pay for getting yourself in trouble. We have more important pressing problems for people on the outside that are doing the right thing!
DuShawn
December 5th, 2012
4:02 pm
-On topic- Over the years of marriage, I’ve learned to submit to my wife. After a decade of research, I’ve discovered four words that help you avoid a lot of bullsh*&t: YES BABY, YOU’RE RIGHT. If you can master saying those words at the right time and more importantly perfect the art of zoning out and making her voice sound like the teacher on Charlie Brown, you are ahead of the game in keeping your thing together.
Celisea
December 5th, 2012
4:02 pm
No….I don’t think so. I would hope that never happened/presented
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
4:03 pm
ForReal ~ no, I wouldn’t expect it. If he pushed me out of the way and took the bullet, that would be his decision, nothing I expect.
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:04 pm
Jake – Yep…the dummy decided to try to smuggle out of Venezuala and got locked up down there for 18 months, then 9 months in Miami. He was desperate for money at the time. Such an idiot! But…he was lucky to live through prison in Venezuala. That’s a rough place for sure, where they allowed guns, drugs, and other stuff inside.
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
4:04 pm
Jake ~ I purposely let that go. I was afraid of what she might say (lololol).
Celisea
December 5th, 2012
4:06 pm
Off topic:
We should have a blog career day
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:06 pm
Kimmie…they actually charge the person the prisoner is calling. My friend’s friend was recently locked up and she has to buy minutes so that he can call her…That is crazy to me…
disco
December 5th, 2012
4:07 pm
big ups bluz. lol. none of my people have made appearances on the prison shows (at least not yet). I did have a cousin appear on an episode of america’s most wanted though.
i'm swiss
December 5th, 2012
4:07 pm
“We have more important pressing problems for people on the outside that are doing the right thing!”
kimmie — I agree, except that we do need to look at why we have so many more people locked up, per capita, than anywhere else in the world (ahem, war on drugs, ahem). The majority of folks in jail (even those who are truly guilty of the “crimes” with which they’re charged) don’t need to be locked up. But prisons are a huge industry, built primarily on what amounts to slave labor, so they’re not going to give up those “resources” without a fight.
disco
December 5th, 2012
4:08 pm
bluz – when folks started letting go of the house phones they had to figure out another way for inmates to get through. so now there are packages of pre-paid jailhouse minutes that you can buy so you can get prison calls on your cell phone.
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
4:08 pm
That is crazy to me
Bluz – Me too!
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:09 pm
disco – He definitely loves the spotlight and got paid for doing the show, so he was more than happy. Anytime they played reruns, he would run to Facebook and tell everyone to watch it! I told him flat out that he looked like a real dumb a$$ and she shouldn’t promote that! LOL
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
4:10 pm
swiss – Okay, but that’s WAY down the list of priorities to me!
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:10 pm
I had a friend years ago who got locked up on bogus charges in California. We would write letters to each other. No need for quick phone calls that cost an arm and a leg. Sure, letters may take a few days to get there, but what’s the big rush?
disco
December 5th, 2012
4:10 pm
swiss – you are right to say that prison is big business here. not to mention the entire concept of parole is nothing but a con and a hustle. heck I’ve never even been to prison and I violate parole on the regular.
Jake-SPJTWB
December 5th, 2012
4:12 pm
Well I will be dayumed, I saw that episode, a musician right…Bluz, you sure you aren’t pulling my chain, if not, you have had some experiences with some intereting cats.
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:12 pm
I did know someone who showed up on Cops in the 80’s I think. He was very well known in New Orleans and the cops came in during Mardi Gras because of some crazy stuff on the balcony. He opened the door and they were like…”of course it’s you George. Just tell them to calm down and have a nice night!”
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
4:13 pm
My mom always told me that if I ever went to jail don’t call her cause she wasn’t coming to get me, needless to say I wasn’t about to test that one out. I also told my son’s I don’t visit folks in prison, and I ant putting nothing on your books!!
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:15 pm
Jake – yep…blues musician from Atlanta. The chick in the show, who was his girlfriend at the time, is the only girl I’ve ever gotten into a fist fight with and it had nothing to do with him! She shouldn’t have had her moment in the show because she knew all along what he was doing and helped set it up, yet she acted like she was totally innocent and didn’t know anything.
Leggs
December 5th, 2012
4:17 pm
Single ~ I told my child if she decided to make jail her home, I won’t visit. I don’t like the food or the furniture!
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
4:18 pm
Bluz, I remember that episode I think
Swiss is it possible that we have more folks looked up because we have made prison life so easy? you will hear some of these guys say they don’t mind doing time like it’s okay
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:19 pm
If I ever got arrested for anything, I would not call my parents! They would kick my a$$!!!!
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:22 pm
S/H – If you think about it…folks go to prison and get a bed to sleep in, food to eat, equipment to work out, tv to watch. It’s not as bad as it should be…
disco
December 5th, 2012
4:23 pm
lol. am I the only person here with a “get disco out of jail plan” in place? not wishing it on myself. not living a jailbird lifestyle. still I know things can happen. it’s easy for anyone to land in jail on a humbug. now prison, that’s different but a weekend in a holding cell isn’t so far-fetched.
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
4:24 pm
Bluz, prison needs to be a deterrent, not somewhere you go and relax. Slave labor, I think not, need to bring back the chain gangs, Make it a place that no one would want to go.
i'm swiss
December 5th, 2012
4:24 pm
“is it possible that we have more folks looked up because we have made prison life so easy? “
Well, once you’ve been to prison, it’s definitely easier to go back than to go straight on the outside — we’ve made sure of that. But prison life here isn’t any easier than other western countries, and yet they don’t have the same huge prison populations we have. My general rule of thumb on any issue is follow the money. Want to know why we have the laws we do, that produce the large number of non-violent “felons” that we have? Just look for who benefits from such a system. And how they spend their lobbying $$.
kimmie
December 5th, 2012
4:24 pm
Bluz- We actually had a friend of the family that kept going in and out of prison. He admitted he just could not make it out on his own.
Bluzgirl
December 5th, 2012
4:24 pm
disco – I guess I should memorize a couple of my friend’s phone numbers so that I wouldn’t have to call my parents! I sure hope it never happens, but you never know!
Single and Happy Wondrous Wednesday
December 5th, 2012
4:25 pm
Disco, you have to learn how to walk away, look at the bigger picture.
Jake-SPJTWB
December 5th, 2012
4:27 pm
They also get to watch for shanks and azz-rapers in Prison. People die in there daily, we don’t hear about it because no gives a dayum…I will stay out here where I belong!!