Substance over superficial?
My friend Panama participated in a relationship panel that listed “substance over superficial” as part of a man’s wish list. I won’t come out and call shenanigans on this title completely, because women are known to be superficial creatures too. However, I want to know how many men can truly say they value substance more than superficial things?
I have seen a lot of men who get blinded by the beauty and completely overlook glaring red flags. When they learn the woman’s character is horrendous, do they take their lesson and choose better the next time? If so, what age do you think men become more enlightened?
When we tout all the things that are meaningful traits that would contribute to a lasting, long relationship, are we putting all that above the physical? Obviously we want the both of best worlds: personality and looks, but what is more important?
How many people have you asked out or dated strictly on their looks? If you had prior knowledge someone that you were attracted to is a raging jerk, would that turn you off enough to keep it moving?
Basically, what I want to know is..how superficial are you? If you were to rate your superficial number based on 1 to 10 scale, with 10 being SHALLOW HAL.
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
accessAtlanta Partner Sites
Sections
Advertise on accessAtlanta.com »
Reach the audience you want by advertising on accessAtlanta.com
Join the Access Atlanta Network »
Advertisers and Publishers, expand your reach by joining the Access Atlanta Network.
Tell us what you think about the site
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement | About our ads
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
261 comments Add your comment
Robert
December 4th, 2012
12:49 pm
@MsATL – “I think I may be too headstrong for you.”
Perhaps….But I think my “head” may be too strong for you. lol…
Lady~sunshine
December 4th, 2012
12:49 pm
oh my!
Bluzgirl
December 4th, 2012
12:54 pm
I would say that I rate a 6 on the superficial scale. I definitely will take substance over looks. I’ve dated men in the past that may not have been the best looking men, but had a lot of great qualities (well…at the time). The Young One is a cutie, but doesn’t have enough substance for me.
And swiss…you’re right. I’m not a huge girl, but I’ve got some meat on my bones and I have to say that I know how to lay it down in the bedroom!!!
MsAtl
December 4th, 2012
12:56 pm
Robert- I am just going to leave that one alone, lol.
i'm swiss
December 4th, 2012
12:57 pm
“I’ve got some meat on my bones and I have to say that I know how to lay it down in the bedroom!!!”
Well, hello there, Bluz. How you doin’?
disco
December 4th, 2012
12:57 pm
lol. I always heard little, skinny chicks were “deeper”. fellas, any truth in that?
Bluzgirl
December 4th, 2012
1:00 pm
LOL swiss…I knew I’d get a reaction out of you! Too bad you have a Mrs. swiss…You’ll never know how I can lay it down!
Leggs
December 4th, 2012
1:01 pm
That was a nice spin, Robert. Good for you (lmao).
Leggs
December 4th, 2012
1:03 pm
Cool, Celisea.
Ex – why waste typing anything!!
Exiled!
December 4th, 2012
1:12 pm
why u gotta double down by saying little and skinny..
Disco?
now Slim wont chime in now…. lol
but Slim/Skinny = Deep
Big = Tight
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
1:24 pm
Sag’s time to rise.
Whateva…y’all only got a few more weeks then it’s Capricorn season…right in time for the festivities of Christmas and New Year’s.
December birthday celebrants should do something…drinks n dinner mayhaps…
SlimNu: Life always happens
December 4th, 2012
1:41 pm
Ex – You raaaaaaang lol I think that saying about skinny being deep is probably just a fable. And if you’re big, are you really tight or your extra meat is creating the illusion that your puddy is extra tight? Hmmmm
Robert
December 4th, 2012
1:42 pm
@Disco – “I always heard little, skinny chicks were “deeper”. fellas, any truth in that?”
Well, it depends on how many kids she had. Some women regardless of size after children need to get it “tighten-up”. Skinny chicks cause other problems such as “blue balls”. I need a healthly woman with meat on her bones to go as deep as I like to go.
i'm swiss
December 4th, 2012
1:45 pm
“And if you’re big, are you really tight or your extra meat is creating the illusion that your puddy is extra tight?”
For that matter, if she’s really that big, is it actually good puddy or just a sweaty fold?
Robert
December 4th, 2012
1:52 pm
@i’m swiss – “I’ve got some meat on my bones and I have to say that I know how to lay it down in the bedroom!!!”
Hello. You can reach me at 770 ROBERTS. Look forward to hearing from you soon.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 4th, 2012
1:57 pm
Yes Cely I still have your email, Pappa Deax’s is good for me. Leggs you and Lady are welcome I’m good on the 20th. It will be a pleasure to be in ya’lls company.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 4th, 2012
2:01 pm
Hey Sassy that’s right you’re a child of December, come on board the ship.
i'm swiss
December 4th, 2012
2:01 pm
Robert — Just so there’s no confusion, I’m going to forward your previous post over to Bluz, who, I hope, was the intended recipient. In any case, you won’t be hearing from me anytime soon. Or ever.
SlimNu: Life always happens
December 4th, 2012
2:01 pm
swiss – I learned on the Bert show a year or so ago that those sweaty folds are called panis’. lol
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:03 pm
Blackfoote – Hit me up
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:06 pm
Boooo, my salad was NOT good today
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:07 pm
The 20th is the Thursday before my touch-up. NOT gonna be a good hair day….lol IJS
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:07 pm
come on board the ship.
Why thank you Blackfoote
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:07 pm
And look at Robert getting all bucky and spreading his wings. Awwww sookie sookie now.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:08 pm
Why are you saying that Celi?
You planning something?
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:09 pm
That was in reference to your first 2:07…
Lady~sunshine
December 4th, 2012
2:11 pm
cool beans!
Lady~sunshine
December 4th, 2012
2:12 pm
no red lobster?!? lol
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:13 pm
Sassy – Just hate to do stuff with a nappy head….lol Really I’m kidding and saying that that lightly.
Bluzgirl
December 4th, 2012
2:15 pm
LOL Robert! I’ll call you in a few!
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 4th, 2012
2:17 pm
LOL…..@Lady that made me blurt out loud that got all my folk looking and wondering why am I snickering at the computer screen.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:21 pm
Celi just checking…didn’t recall anyone suggesting anything so I wondered if I missed something…no problema
Bluzgirl
December 4th, 2012
2:23 pm
Going back to yesterday’s discussion about the difference between hair on black and white people…do black people have issues with dandruff? Just curious…
Lady~sunshine
December 4th, 2012
2:26 pm
lol I knew you would laugh sir! ha! #carryon
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:27 pm
For 9100 points I can redeem and purchase a Whirlpool Range or a laptop or an iPhone! Too bad I only have 5000…lol
For 5000 points I can redeem and purchase (just to name a few), a $250 BB gift card or BR or BBW or Gap (that’s just some merchants). A few restaurants, etc. For less for 5000, I can purchase Kate Spade bag(s), KC watches, B&B bag(s), CK watches, motor bike, Gucci bracelet, ACOUSTIC GUITAR, Coach legacy duffle bag and so much more…. I think I like the stuff that’s going for less than 5000…
Just checking out our site while I take a break…sigh…I’z tied
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:28 pm
Sassy – Blackfoote asked me to pick a spot for hanging out….for the Dec birthdays.
Leggs
December 4th, 2012
2:29 pm
We all get dandruff. Some flakes are bigger than others, but what else is new in life.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:33 pm
Blackfoote asked me to pick a spot for hanging out….for the Dec birthdays.
That’s cool but it seems as though sometimes these things gather alot of steam on the blog but end up being a bust in reality. You guys party like it’s 1999 when y’all hang and drink one for me.
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 4th, 2012
2:35 pm
A lady just called from a law firm needing information on a client. After giving her what she needed she started flirting by asking me do women compliment me on my voice, I said yes. The flood gates blew open she started asking my height, weight and finally phone number. I don’t have a big head and I do get hit on over the phones a lot, some I’ve met and some I haven’t. Could this be an early Christmas pakage or a bust? Hmmmmm.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:37 pm
Enter your comments here
Leggs
December 4th, 2012
2:38 pm
So true, Sassy, so true!
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:38 pm
Sassy – I started typing something and then erased. I agree. I’ve only met up with Leggs and once with Willie, Jake and Swiss (which all showed up). But yeah, that’s a common thing I’ve noticed too. And partly why I sort of pass/passed on the idea when it’s tossed out there. Lady and I have met up a couple of times and WillieD (sorry boo….it’s innocent and all good) will meet for drinks and wings and cut up and laugh and have a blast. Not so much group gatherings though.
Blackfoote – You ain’t gonna bamboozle us are you? I’m calling your bluff (sorry that’s strong but I have no other word…lol). Don’t have some other dude showing up saying, oh btw I got an invite too cause you don’t really exist or it’s some other 4 foot dude turning the knobs behind the scene daily…lol You done told us how tall you are so don’t bail on us. I’m looking for a dude on stilts
Leggs
December 4th, 2012
2:38 pm
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:40 pm
Blackfoote guess you won’t know ’til you try,huh?…
Anyhoo, I really,really don’t want to go to the gym…but read y’all in a few…
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:40 pm
Blackfoote – I thought you was booed up? No? If not, go for it my man!!
Blackfoote: The Real Blackfoote
December 4th, 2012
2:41 pm
Damn she just sent me a picture and she’s goreous. WTF!
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:42 pm
Not so much group gatherings though.
I’ve noticed that as well…so I won’t be doing that anymore… It’s all good.
Sassy Me...Exhaling ;-)
December 4th, 2012
2:43 pm
Treadmill here I come…ugh..
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:46 pm
Damn she just sent me a picture and she’s goreous. WTF!
Is that your exit?? LOLOL I KID I KID You ain’t responded to none of our posts since 2:00. You know it’s all good.
Celisea
December 4th, 2012
2:47 pm
Where is MMeello?