Dating Dilemma: Didn’t meet the family?
Keith is trying to reassure the woman he is dating after he decided not to introduce her to his family at Thanksgiving. They are in a new relationship and things were not at the “meet the family” stage…according to him. She is seeing this as rejection and is now questioning everything and second guessing her feelings about him.
I feel for her, I really do, but she seems to be overreacting and over analyzing the situation. Shocking, right? So yeah, women are known to do this and it isn’t really fair. When Keith is actually being a good guy by taking things slow and not giving her false hope, she is letting insecurities show.
Would it bother you if the person you were dating has yet to introduce you to his inner circle of family/friends? I remember meeting families really early in relationships, but I didn’t think that was a sign of how much the guy liked me. Is meeting the family still viewed as a big deal like it was back in the day?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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208 comments Add your comment
disco
November 27th, 2012
11:01 am
S/H – hush. ain’t nobody talking about time actually being faster or slower. we just comment when it feels faster or slower. don’t go being all persnickety and whatnot.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:02 am
Lady – Cool! I’m off the first week (I think…gotta check my calendar) and come back to cover for my teammate in Florida, who’s going home to the Carribean. Then I’m off the week of Christmas
I haven’t really decided what to do during this time. I think I’m still gonna lose a few days. It’s okay though. That’s how it is every year with me, it seems…lol
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:03 am
Lady – There’s a bunch of stuff to do here in the city. Honey go ‘head then and paint the town! Have fun!
Single and Happy Terrific Tuesday
November 27th, 2012
11:06 am
@disco
czBrat ♀
November 27th, 2012
11:10 am
cool, celisea. savannah is pretty but i’ve never thought of visiting this time of year. my boss was in tybee last week. she said the weather was beautiful. glad you had a blast.
panama was a.maze.ing! we had a fabulous time. s/o got exactly what he wanted. he met my extended fam, my childhood bff, and checked out some of my old stomping grounds. he was very impressed. it’s a beautiful place. we’re now trying to work another visit into the next two years’ travel plans.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:12 am
czBrat – That’s fantab (for you and him)
It much have been with the “a.maze.ing” Love that…lol Glad everything with well for you and boo 
We initially talked of going to Tybee Saturday but got sidetracked and ended up not going. The weather was BEAUTIFUL. A little chilly on River Street, only though because of how the buildings are positioned and it’s mostly “shaded” there.
Leggs
November 27th, 2012
11:16 am
czB ~ glad you guys had a blast, but I knew you would.
Lady~sunshine
November 27th, 2012
11:17 am
going to Fla is a getaway within itself sis~ Glad you are getting your travel in on both ends!
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:20 am
Lady – While the Carribean has been postponed, I can’t complain. I’ve had much fun these last few months. Heck, if you’re going next door and gonna get the much needed rest we’re all probably are in dire need of, I’LL TAKE IT!!! lol Hopefully, I can better plan next year.
Hit me up, while you’re out on the town
czBrat ♀
November 27th, 2012
11:22 am
awww, thanx celisea & leggs.
was lil leggs home last week?
Lady~sunshine
November 27th, 2012
11:27 am
will do! a meet & greet is in order~
Leggs
November 27th, 2012
11:29 am
Yes ma’am. She was home for 10 days! We did a lot in those 10 days, and I was pleased that she spent so much time with me. Her friends came over instead of her leaving to go see them. I liked that!
czBrat ♀
November 27th, 2012
11:32 am
ain’t it lovely when you start to feel that shift toward actually liking your kid, for no reason other than they’re just cool to be around.
thing 2 is in town til tomorrow. he still has his moments of making me wonder why i didn’t stop at one.
Leggs
November 27th, 2012
11:34 am
It’s quite lovely, but she’s still a sloppy pig! I didn’t miss that part.
disco
November 27th, 2012
11:35 am
y’all are funny. I like my kid and all but I don’t know if I want him around for 10 straight days. lol. it’s messed up to admit but I miss my son the most when something needs doing that I don’t want to do or if I need something from the store and don’t want to go get it. I don’t deny that an “errand boy” would be nice.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:38 am
<em<ain’t it lovely when you start to feel that shift toward actually liking your kid, for no reason other than they’re just cool to be around
This made me laugh, but it’s oh so true. My kid is out for 3 days because she got into a fight preholiday. She and bf!!! WTHeck?!?! He told me yesterday that somebody “disrespected” her and he was defending her honor….blank stare here
I asked “ummm, y’all getting married soon?” Don’t get me wrong, I can dig that but…I’M JUST SAYING!! I mean y’all getting suspended together…IJS Yeah, a couple of months til 18…hurry up please….lololol
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:38 am
I was tryna do italics…pooh
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:40 am
I was recopying, making the point that I can dig a parent feeling that way. Like getting to a point where it’s cool having the kid around. I can dig that cause I have yet to get to that….
I KID I KID
Lady~sunshine
November 27th, 2012
11:43 am
oh my C~
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
11:47 am
Well, I can’t even focus on mine being away yet. That’s too many years to even think about. The boy I don’t mind so much, but that girl? Whoooosaaaa! I told my hubs she is either going to be a rocket scientist or a serial killer so we need to be diligent in how we are raising her to make sure that one goes right!
Jake-SPJTWB
November 27th, 2012
11:50 am
Sounds like the holidays been good to everyone.
Hey Lady, so mama gave you the keys to the store on the S/O…you in now…lol
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:50 am
Lady – Guuuuuurl
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:51 am
Both of them looking like dumb and dumber yesterday….seriously
SlimNu: Life always happens
November 27th, 2012
11:52 am
I spoke to my stepdad last night and he told me he had a dream that my sister shot him and my mom.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
11:54 am
I love my kid dearly and would give my life for her (I think….lol), in a tight situation, but I’m HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY I didn’t do the dang thing more than once. Honestly, not because of her, she’s okay, just experiencing growing pains. But, it’s real work raising kids.
disco
November 27th, 2012
11:55 am
Celisea – not that they got suspended together. how romantic. lol.
CC – a rocket scientist or a serial killer? dang. the gotcha would be if she was both. rocket science by day, dissolving bodies in acid by night.
kimmie
November 27th, 2012
11:55 am
Sup Gang!!
Didn’t have time to read thru all, but Cel I’m feeling your first post and totally agree!!
I’ve had dudes in the past act like meeting their peeps is some sort of prize, and I guess for some it still is. They would seem to dangle it over my head like if they finally “decided” to bestow upon me that great honor, I would somehow be crowned a princess like Diana!! When I acted non-chalant about it, it really confused them. They didn’t realize I never have problems meeting the fam! Heck, most of the time I ended up getting along with the fam better than I did the dude. Parents always like me, I’m a respectable woman. I had one mother to tell her son after meeting me to not mess over me!
Shoot, if anything the dudes needed to worry whether or not I deemed them worthy to take around MY family! I never dealt with just anybody and sho wouldn’t bring them home!!
czBrat ♀
November 27th, 2012
11:55 am
i decided last night that i have the utmost respect for my daughter. she moved out almost 3 years ago and has resolved to do whatever it takes to remain independent AND responsible. she kept my dogs while i was on vacay; taking on the task of introducing them to a cat household. she checked on my place and collected my mail, and even kept her brother his first day in town before i got back.
then she popped in last night to bring me a b-day gift and hear all about my trip (and, um, drop off her dirty dainties). all in all, she’s become a woman that i could easily consider a friend. never woulda thunk it five years ago.
i’ll try to remember that the next time i’m scowling at my son, wondering how the hell he’s gonna get a grip on life.
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
11:57 am
a rocket scientist or a serial killer? dang. the gotcha would be if she was both. rocket science by day, dissolving bodies in acid by night.
See, disco, you on some real Dexter isht right now…
Jake-SPJTWB
November 27th, 2012
11:58 am
Kimmie, that’s what I meant…nobody brings “just anybody” home, or they shouldn’t.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:01 pm
disco – not that they got suspended together. how romantic.
Yeah, you got it…at least I can tell that’s what those dummies were thinking. I’m just looking at them like, for real??? How about the both of y’all slow y’alls roll and sit on down somewhere. I told her, sticks and stones baby, sticks and stones. What a person says about you only make you that if you believe. Mmmm hmmm, side eye to both of them. Then he had the audacity to look like he might wanna buck a bit when I was talking to them and getting on her more so. He answered saying “yeah.” I was like “yeah??” He said “oh… yes” and I again said “yes??” Then he said “yes ma’am” He ain’t been saying “yeah” to me and she don’t either. Ain’t gon start now…IJS
I know, all old fashioned and stuff.
Kimmie – Thanks!
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
12:01 pm
cz/C~ I hope that your stories end up being mine, but realistically I could see me having a “disco” type relationship with my daughter. She would move accross the country and talk to me all the time but I would know nothing about her life. (Like finding out she had a baby via FB type of stuff)
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:07 pm
czBrat – I’m proud of the kid for you. Not that your son won’t get there. Sometimes it takes a little longer for some than others. At least we can chaulk it up to youth. Not some 39 year old still living at home with mama
CC – I sure there will be that open back and forth. I’m finding out the more you loosen the reins (not give them full range), the more independence they’ll take on as well as being more open with you. At least for now that’s how it is/has been. I will say though, SHE KNOWS EVERYDANGTHING….sheesh. She was busy saying yesterday, she’s determined to make it on her own by way of doing it herself….blah blah blah That’s all well and good, but you still need guidance and stepping stones. That’s gonna be her downfall, if any. Not in a bad way, but she’s the typical “almost 18 but knows more than you.” But how many ain’t been down that road???
czBrat ♀
November 27th, 2012
12:10 pm
hot lunch date!
i mean, hot date for lunch, not that lunch will be hot.
the date will be hot.
well, i guess the lunch might be hot too but …
aaargh! yous know what i mean.
ciao
disco
November 27th, 2012
12:10 pm
CC – I think you can get away with a “distant” relationship with a son moreso than a daughter because folks expect mothers/daughters to be all tight like that. a mother/son combo being too tight would reek of punk A momma’s boy. my son and I are cool but I’m not all up in his mix and he’s not all up in mine.
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
12:10 pm
But how many ain’t been down that road???
You should hear crickets in response to that question!
My grandmother used to tell me “You know everything but don’t know nothing!” LMAO! How right she was!
I’m convinced that you don’t get wiser as you get older, there is just less stupid isht that you haven’t already done.
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
12:12 pm
disco~ Et tu, Brutus? You don’t get with your mom like that from what you’ve said so how do you get away with it?
Lady~sunshine
November 27th, 2012
12:15 pm
C you read my mind on that assessment~
J yup she did! I didn’t even see it coming but she sees right through both of us as she should~
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:17 pm
CC – Yup. Gonna see that stance change over the years. This I know to be true. ESPECIALLY when she start having her kids and see all the DUMB stuff they do…lololol
Lady –
Lady~sunshine
November 27th, 2012
12:24 pm
C I feel your 11:54 and very content with the same stance and making my executive decision! I am GOOD! lol
disco
November 27th, 2012
12:25 pm
CC – I get away with it because I’ve always been “funny acting” and living several states away helps too.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:37 pm
Lady – You got it. I wasn’t really thinking I don’t want more kids, because at one time I did. But, now that I’m waaaay down the road, I’m glad I didn’t. I and guess because I didn’t, it wasn’t meant to be anyway
Leggs
November 27th, 2012
12:38 pm
Dayum, SlimNu! That could be your stepfather’s way of indicating how messed up your sister is and needs help. Glad she’s going to start therapy. Some dreams can be our warning signs.
Leggs
November 27th, 2012
12:42 pm
“…I’m HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY I didn’t do the dang thing more than once. Honestly, not because of her, she’s okay, just experiencing growing pains. But, it’s real work raising kids. – Most definitely!!!
disco
November 27th, 2012
12:46 pm
when I was raising my one child I was all good with one. now that he’s an adult I do feel like I deprived him of a sibling. the fact that my son and brother are only 4 years apart (and get along well) takes a bit of the edge off of that though.
Comon Cents
November 27th, 2012
12:53 pm
Slim~ FYI…
To see murder committed in your dreams, foretells much sorrow arising from the misdeeds of others. Affair will assume dulness. Violent deaths will come under your notice.
If you commit murder, it signifies that you are engaging in some dishonorable adventure, which will leave a stigma upon your name.
To dream that you are murdered, foretells that enemies are secretly working to overthrow you.
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:54 pm
On the one kid thing, I don’t think back then I could have handled more than one. Financially, mentally, none of it. I don’t really think about her not have other sibs, never have. I use to wonder what it would be like once she’s gone, even with that, I don’t really think about that no more. My thoughts are now, life will hand me back a few good years to take up where I left off, but with a better mindset, better finances, better footings (underneath me), a stronger backbone, so forth and so on. So, when the few goods years are totally handed back to me, I know now how to navigate void of the dumb stuff I did prior to kid. It’s like I know where I wanna go and how much time it’s gonna take me to get there. As opposed to feeling my way through as a kid and wasting time and years on stuff and people (going nowhere). Lord willing (on the how much time it’s gonna take to get their part).
Celisea......refreshed!!!
November 27th, 2012
12:59 pm
And what I ain’t gonna deal with. Not that I’ve been one for taking much crap…lol IJS
MsAtl
November 27th, 2012
12:59 pm
The last of my three will be headed to college in a month. I had three others that were not mine biologically and they are grown with children of their own. Now, to find something to do with myself…
disco
November 27th, 2012
12:59 pm
C – I didn’t think about the sibling thing when he was younger. I figured my brother and assorted cousins would have to fill in the gap and make it do what it do. I only considered the whole aspect of the sibling thing (a day late and a dollar short I might add) in regard to his adulthood. I remember thinking it was crazy when I met folks who didn’t have cousins. I grew up with dozens of them and to not have any seemed unbelievable to me. now I realize my kid can very likely be that person who has a child with no cousins. also, I think about after the parents are gone how it’s nice that the siblings have each other. naturally I wasn’t thinking any of this then, only now. oh well. he’ll be alright.