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Think outside the box?

I read somewhere that women should consider sending a thank you gift after a first date. I’ve never done this personally, but I imagine that is a surefire way to make a great impression. Maybe more women should think outside the box when it comes to dating?

Guys, what would you do if someone gave you a thank you gift because she really enjoyed the date you planned for her?

Ladies, have you ever felt compelled to send a note or thank you gift after a really fantastic date? Would you feel uncomfortable reciprocating a man’s effort that soon after your dating relationship began?

We all can get in dating ruts from time to time! What are some unique ways to think outside the box when it comes to dating?

Happy Friday!

By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog

337 comments Add your comment

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
6:50 am

Knowing you had a great time, is gift enough for me.

Exiled!

November 2nd, 2012
7:44 am

With some of the Big egos out there,it is an idea that proly won’t get mileage!

But a decent and nice lady should consider trying it,even when you font feel dude after that one date.

Better yet,say the Thank Yous in bold somewhere in the middle and then slide in the crotch kicker in small print at the bottom:

I’m sorry it won’t work out ‘tween the two of us.
:lol:

Exiled!

November 2nd, 2012
7:45 am

Don’t

And Good Friday Morning Good folks!

Exiled!

November 2nd, 2012
8:01 am

So University of GA football recruits criminals who can play football?

Seems that’s their MO…

I can see how that might be a ‘good’ idea considering football is a tough physical sport….get some tough hood gang bangers.

Button

November 2nd, 2012
8:35 am

That’s a good idea but I wouldn’t go as far as giving a gift after a first date, instead a nice text after the date is over saying thank you for a great date would be suffice, now if we go for a second date then I’ll give a nice little gift as a thank you for a second date.
I dated a guy who gave me little trinkets everytime I saw him from day one. It was annoying! He meant well but I wasn’t feeling it. Looking back it was a sweet gesture and what was weird and annoying to me then is something I’m all for now.

good morning—–TGIF!!

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
8:58 am

Good morning folks,

SH – I see you rolled yourself in this morn ;-)

I have never sent a thank you card after a date but I’m always letting the dude know I appreciate xyz…Even if the beau and I go somewhere and he pays, I still say, Hey babe, Thanks for dinner or thanks for grilling me some weenies, thanks for picking me up some blah blah blah. I never want whomever I’m dating to feel they are merely a sponsor for me and that i’m ungrateful.

Button

November 2nd, 2012
9:00 am

Single and Happy your a simple guy :)

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
9:01 am

Oh, I did send his parents a thank you card though after hanging out with them in Orlando a few months ago. ;-)

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
9:01 am

Button life is simple, it’s people that make it complicated :-D

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
9:05 am

I wouldn’t send a gift, but I would definitely let him know I was flattered by certain events during the date.

Button ~ that’s funny. We do tend to miss what we felt was an annoying trait of a mate. When it’s gone, that’s when you realize….awwww, that was sweet (lol).

Morning!!!

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
9:06 am

Slim I need that big push to get out of bed in the morning, after that it’s all down hill :-)

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
9:12 am

SlimNu ~ excellent example of when a thank you card would be appropriate.

LeeH1

November 2nd, 2012
9:12 am

It used to be done all the time by ladies. It is called a “Bread and Butter” note, and it is a “Thank you” for a nice supper or date or excursion of some sort.

Sigh. There are so few ladies around anymore, that this is considered a new idea.

MsAtl

November 2nd, 2012
9:15 am

Morning All! I wouldn’t send a gift after a first date, but I would always say thank you and show that I appreciated the efforts. I did invite him on a date to a nice restaurant (and paid for it) after several good dates.

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
9:15 am

When it’s gone, that’s when you realize….awwww, that was sweet (lol).

Leggs yeah, that’s the way Love goes lol I’m sure the beau get’s tired of me giving him cards randomly lol

I recall one night I sat up and cut up little hearts of paper and on each one I wrote the different things that I liked/loved/missed about him. I stuck them all in random places over his house. For instance, if I said something about how I look forward to having our morning tea together, i’d put that paper in the box of tea for him to find when I was not there…or if I mentioned how I looked forward to laying next to each other at night, then i’d put that note on the pillow or something… :oops:

MsAtl

November 2nd, 2012
9:16 am

Hey Leggs- I saw a car driving down I-20 a few days ago & the license plate looked like it said LEGGS, lol.

Exiled!

November 2nd, 2012
9:17 am

Bluzgirl

November 2nd, 2012
9:25 am

I would think a lot of men would see that as psycho if I went and bought them a gift after the first date. I would definitely say thank you. When I went out with Youngster, I sent him a text when I got home that said thank you for a wonderful evening.

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
9:27 am

Really, someone’s driving around impersonating me (lol).

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
9:32 am

Good Morning & Happy Friday!

Buying gifts for an enjoyable date? Negative, ghostrider. I have no problem with showing my appreciation. I am even willing to plan a second date. However, there will be no post date gifts.

Ex~ You’re just salty that the GAYtors got beat. Please lick your wounds in private. No one wants to hear that isht this morning…

Blog love!

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
9:38 am

Comon ~ he has a lot of licking to do. Remember the lion ripped open his throat yesterday.

Enigma

November 2nd, 2012
9:51 am

“I read somewhere that women should consider sending a thank you gift after a first date”

Funny that Wise Diva should post this as a topic because just today I was thinking: If I go on a first date that goes pretty well, I will send a handwritten thank you note.

Kd21

November 2nd, 2012
9:51 am

Morning all. On topic, I’ve done it before. It was a giftcard to Starbucks. Our first date was coffee and little get-to-know you conversation. I found out that he was a bit of a coffee junkie(my word)/ connoisseur(his word).

I wanted a thoughtful and open person so I was thoughtful and open about my feelings. Can’t get what you won’t give. Little things still count to many of us.

Kd21

November 2nd, 2012
9:54 am

@Enigma I think that’s really sweet. The fact that it’s not simply a pre-generated Hallmark standard issue Thank You card is nice as well.

Lee

November 2nd, 2012
9:54 am

No, I would not send a man a gift after the first date. I think that would be a weird, and he might think im a crazy-desperate- which i am not. I have bought little things later – if he talks about something and i happen to come across it – other than that no.

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
9:54 am

Can’t get what you won’t give. Little things still count to many of us – Yes ma’am!!!

disco

November 2nd, 2012
9:57 am

wow. before even reading comments I’ll pipe in and say that it has never ever occurred to me to send a thank you gift after a date. I’ll say thanks during the date or after the date or in a phone call following the date but it has never occurred to me to send a formal note of thanks or an appreciation gift. frankly I think that could either work for you or against you. on one hand folks like dealing with appreciative people. on the other hand you might seem clingy for lack of a better word. don’t know if this is a trend that I’m going to get on board with.

Enigma

November 2nd, 2012
9:57 am

Thanks Kd21. Now all I have to do is hope and pray for a first date. :-(

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
9:58 am

Sigh. There are so few ladies around anymore, that this is considered a new idea.

And men used to put a lot more thought into dates and were much more courteous. They didn’t expect some puddy just because they bought dinner and a drink.

Sigh. There are so few gentlemen left today that that’s considered a new idea.

Button

November 2nd, 2012
10:01 am

Single you got that right :wink:
Leggs, girl aint that the truth! :o l:

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
10:04 am

Comon ~ you spinned it exactly how I would. Thought about it, but since it’s typical of me to do so, I left it alone (lol).

Button

November 2nd, 2012
10:06 am

If I were a man and a woman gave me a gift after a first date there would not be a second date. ijs

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
10:10 am

Leggs~ You know we’re >>>>>here<<<<< :lol:

disco

November 2nd, 2012
10:10 am

CC/leggs – maybe lee comes from that generation where women were actively, aggressively seeking mates but they masked the entire subliminal attack behind a veil of feminine wiles. you know the women who always have event tickets that were “gifted” to them and that it would be “oh such a shame to let said tickets to go to waste”. then some sucker comes along and escorts them to the event. after the “date” as part two of her scheme, she sends him a thank you card or a thank you gift depending on his eligibility. the whole thank you nothing but a barrage of words carefully selected to stroke his ego. lol. it was all game. a nice little song and dance where everyone knew their roles. just because ladies have changed the game doesn’t mean they aren’t ladies anymore.

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
10:13 am

Comon, some of us still put thought into our dates, not always about the puddy.

Kd21

November 2nd, 2012
10:14 am

Disclaimer: I am a romantic at heart and not afraid to show my feelings.

That being said, “courting,” as the old folks called it is such a lost art. *sigh* It is a two-way street that very few are willing to cross.

I’m not afraid to both tell and show the person I’m with that I’m enjoying the vibe between us. If he’s not feeling the same that’s ok. THIS is how I’ll know that he’s not where I am or perhaps not at all what I need and cease to waste my time.

Fear of rejection or fear of coming-across the wrong way is for kids. When what you truly wish to say or do is impeded by YOUR thoughts of the impression that will be made, that is fear.

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
10:14 am

A thank you card after a first date could very well come off as desperate…Even though the card would say thank you, he could interpret it to mean, Wow, a man has not showed me any attention in a while, my other prospects are sh!tty, i’ wanna get this thang wet, please don’t ditch me anytime soon. :lol:

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
10:16 am

disco~ True (Damn! You made me pull out the 2Chainz voice early today!) :lol:

kimmie

November 2nd, 2012
10:19 am

Morning Gang!

I’ve heard of guys sending flowers after the first date. My now husband showed up at our first date with 3 pink roses for me! I had a few in the past to show up on the first date with a flower. Incredibly sweet and thoughtful, even before we went out! I’ve always had at least several phone conversations before I went on any 1st date though.

As for a lady sending a thank you gift after a great first date, I don’t know about that. People misinterpret so much these days. I would not want to come off as desperate, especially if it was a simple first date, which I think all 1st dates should be. Now if he took me to the Grammy’s or a state dinner at the White House for a first date, I could see it then. In fact, at the very least I would send a handwritten thank you. But if we just went to a movie and grabbed some coffee and dessert, a thank you will suffice.

I always say thank you for a date, though. Even now that I’m married, I still say thank you for nice evenings and gifts. It’s the least one can do and goes along way in relationships and in your career too.

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
10:19 am

S/H~ While I am not suggesting that you don’t put thought into your dates (I mean, honestly, how would I know?!?) While you are single and happy, you date online. If you truly want to stay single yet, you’re not saying no to puddy, the most logical explanation is you date to get puddy. You don’t need these women for company (you already have that in your current friends) You (according to your own posts) don’t want anymore children. You’re happy with the fasmily you currently have. Ergo, dating= puddy. IJS…

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
10:21 am

Kd21 ~ I definitely agree that the concept of “courting” is lost for some. But, I do see it in action from time to time.

SlimNu ~ too damn funny, but bet very much on point!

THE INFAMOUS DK

November 2nd, 2012
10:24 am

I would consider it a nice gesture. And would call her agin for another date. She would definitely get more consideration than anyone else.

HOLA EVERYONE!!! I’ve missed ya’ll!!!

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
10:26 am

It’s the least one can do and goes along way in relationships and in your career too

kimmie – After I was chosen to go to Dallas for the job, I didn’t send a handwritten note but I did send out a thank you email to my superiors. ;-) And i’ve only been out with one dude that gave me a rose on our first date. It was one of the best 1st dates I’ve ever gone on but too bad buddy was a conceited DOU-CHE :lol:

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
10:29 am

Comon, I’m single as in not married, happy meaning people act like I need to be married to be happy. that’s where the name came from, 50 not looking to have kids in high school when I’m trying to retire. Since I’m in a relationship, not looking to “date” anyone. so anyone I go out with right now is just friends, I want something to eat, you want something to eat, lets eat, no puddy involved. and when I did “date”, it was more than just online (LOL) When I’m actively dating to get to know someone puddy is the last thing on my mind.

Leggs

November 2nd, 2012
10:29 am

Buenos Dias, InfamousDK!

DuShawn

November 2nd, 2012
10:30 am

DK – Thats one of the old heads from years ago.

Button

November 2nd, 2012
10:33 am

buddy was a conceited DOU-CHE @ SlimNu I dated his twin brother :lol:

SlimNu - Finally Friday :-)

November 2nd, 2012
10:33 am

puddy is the last thing on my mind.

SH – Yeah but you always start at the bottom of your mental list, making puddy the first on the agenda lol Just messin witcha

Comon ¢

November 2nd, 2012
10:34 am

S/H~ C’mon. Admit it. Online dating is a euphemism for looking at porn. You can tell us. We blog family. :lol:

Single and Happy

November 2nd, 2012
10:35 am

LOL @ Slim, I have actually had women stop seeing me because I was taking to long to try and get the puddy