Dating: Unlearn bad habits!
There comes a time in every person’s romantic life when you have to stop and take self-inventory. You know those gut check moments when you start to realize that a lot of misadventures, drama, and disappointments all share something in common: YOU.
I know, it’s not sexy or fun, but it is definitely necessary. How many old attitudes and bad dating habits are we clinging to that run off potentially great matches? There is a lot to be said about self-awareness. Many of us lack it!
Some men think they are projecting some alpha male image and it attracts women to them. They may not realize that they go overboard sometimes and can appear cold and distant. Some women believe they have the hot body and great sex to offer and that is enough to get and keep a man (It’s not, by the way).
So maybe it is worthwhile to figure out what dating habits we need to drop. Determine those old attitudes about the opposite sex that are most likely making us bitter about love. Are you guilty of clinging to bad dating habits?
If you meet someone with awful dating behavior, do you take the time to call them on it?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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299 comments Add your comment
disco
October 9th, 2012
12:31 pm
leggs – I figured you meant it but didn’t want to be putting words in your mouth. you know how folks on here can be sometimes. lol. trying to minimize the drama. glad you like the “respect the truth” mantra. it’s amazing how many folks never learned it. I know there’s at least one little girl in the world who’s working on it. her momma meant business. lol.
MrsSC – I’ve been told that I should watch that show. haven’t got around to it yet.
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:31 pm
And what state is CH?
disco
October 9th, 2012
12:32 pm
CC – I figured he meant good old chi-town. of course, he could have meant Chattanooga.
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:33 pm
Sorry, What state is CH in? I’m familiar with DC, NY and ATL. Not familiar with CH. Did he mean CHI?
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:33 pm
Ok, disco, I thought it was just me…
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:35 pm
Leggs – I see what you’re saying. The way I see it, though, is that had this been a couple of years ago, I would have been chasing him down, even with the bs. I haven’t posted on here about him in a while. There has been some bs just at the friend level in the past month and I’m not having it anymore. Trust me when I say that it’s way different for me than it would have been (or has been) in the past. I only put up with a very small amount of bs from him…after that, I was done with it. He’s still trying a little, but I’m not falling into that trap.
disco
October 9th, 2012
12:37 pm
good for you bluz. good for you. you let those busters know that the new and improved bluz “don’t play that”
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:37 pm
Mrs. SexyCool
October 9th, 2012
11:40 am
And yes, like Comon said…UPS = solidly employed.
But then again, I guess he really didn’t compare to all of the professional men who caught your eye instead.
And probably made just as much or more than those “professional men”
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:37 pm
That’s right disco…I am seeing the bs a little faster than before. I ain’t putting up with it anymore!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:38 pm
Enter your comments here
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:39 pm
Good job, Bluz! Now, if you can just break the pattern to begin with, you will really be getting somewhere. No busters!!! (And no breathalyzers… lol)
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:39 pm
I just have to point something out real quick…S/H – if we are the same person, how can our posts have the same exact time on them? LOL! Ok…enough with that!
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:40 pm
CC – Trust me…I’m working on breaking those patterns too. I’m becoming more and more self aware and “growing up” and will not continue down the same path I’ve been on.
disco
October 9th, 2012
12:42 pm
S/H – I’m not going to shoot down halo. sure she complained that he showed up in his UPS gear. maybe that’s not what she was expecting. still, it seems like she was more perturbed by the skullie and the silver tooth. may have been another faux pas in there but I don’t recall. did she come off as a tad bit superficial? yeah, maybe just a little but it is what it is.
bluz – don’t front. one of you could be sitting some place with two laptops, have entered two comments and hit enter at the exact same time. lol.
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:42 pm
Bluz, I’m using 2 computers to keep everyone on their toes (lmao)
Exiled!
October 9th, 2012
12:43 pm
A real man will try invite u to the crib,he’s most comfortable in his den..
If u accept,expect he will press!
Now don’t fake by saying previsit,’oh so nothing is gon happen,right?’
The mere statement and question is an acknowledgement to him that u expect it to go down.
Go if u want it.
Decline if u don’t.
No 3 ways on this!
i'm swiss
October 9th, 2012
12:43 pm
“if we are the same person, how can our posts have the same exact time on them?”
Pretty easy, actually. Two separate computers (or really even just 2 separate browsers), signed in as different people, type messages, then hit submit on both at the same time. Plus the time shown here only goes to the minute, so there’s a pretty big window.
I don’t think y’all are the same person, but from a technical standpoint, that’s not a solid alibi. (Sorry, the nerd in me had to point that out).
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:44 pm
Disco, I’m not shooting her down, but being blue collar I get that professional man all the time, at the end of the day for me it’s about the income, not the job title.
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:45 pm
LOL disco and S/H!!! Shhh…don’t tell our secrets!
A lot of UPS men look hot in their uniforms. I guess this one didn’t cut it. What a shame!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:45 pm
Disco, we must be the same person, we were typing practically the same thing at the same time (LMAO) again
i'm swiss
October 9th, 2012
12:45 pm
S/H & disco — I think we all 3 forgot to add or so I’ve heard to the end of our posts…
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:46 pm
Ex~ Off topic: Were you able to get the Queen Albertina’ed this weekend?
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:46 pm
Well bluz you can’t blog for awhile, I have to go the dentist (LOL)
Tomorrow peeps
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:47 pm
Swiss, this blog is not that serious to try and fool someone (LOL) or so I’ve heard (LOL)
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
12:48 pm
Disco, I’m not shooting her down, but being blue collar I get that professional man all the time, at the end of the day for me it’s about the income, not the job title.
My hubby is blue collar and I love him. I deal with “professional” tpes all day and I’ll be damned if I want to go home and deal with the same stodgy atitude at night. Blech! However, I don’t think that blue collar was the problem with halo’s UPS man. I think silver (gold) tooth might have been more of an issue than not professional. IJS. M hubby may be blue collar, but he is always sharp as a tack. I couldn’t do sloppy either and what she described sounded sloppy to my ears.
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:49 pm
swiss – I didn’t think about that. BUT…I think most of ya’ll can tell that we are not the same people due to our writing styles and thoughts are very different from each others! I just get tired of the accusations…
SlimUno
October 9th, 2012
12:50 pm
Damn Leggs on that 12:21!!! That truth for yo ass
disco
October 9th, 2012
12:50 pm
S/H – I know. you be repping for our blue collar brothers. I know some of them are making mad bank. I have a few friends who consistently make six figures (even if some of it is attributed to overtime). if anything, I don’t think halo’s issue was that he worked for UPS (she probably knew that going in), I think she was a bit put off that he showed up in his uniform. apparently appearances matter to her. personally I may have been able to get past the uniform but the tooth would have been a problem for real.
Bluzgirl
October 9th, 2012
12:50 pm
See ya S/H!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 9th, 2012
12:59 pm
CC, Disco, I didn’t think it was the ups thing either, but more of the image he put out there, and it had nothing to do with his job.
gone for real this time.
Exiled!
October 9th, 2012
1:01 pm
Common..no I did not coz the weekend was eventful with kids etc..we went vacationing.
But today is her birfday so when we chat again tonite,I’m gon be lovey dovey and slide the Albertina in there somewhere. She don’t know what that is,I’m sure but I’m gon slide ur website link in there for good measure.
I’m laughing coz u know us men know,to score with a woman,ask another woman!
What say u Common..tidbits?
SlimUno
October 9th, 2012
1:01 pm
She just felt stupid sitting at the spot with her pageant dress on sitting across from a UPS man.
Robert
October 9th, 2012
1:03 pm
@Common Cents – “Possesion, not perception is 9/10ths of the law”
Once a person says it they can not take it back. People will preceive what they think. No matter how much you try to change their “perceptions” the damage is already done. You can tell the truth 100% but women will only remember what she already thinks and believes.
Exiled!
October 9th, 2012
1:06 pm
There are some ups truckers who owner operate their trucks and make good bank for sure.
Don’t sleep in the truckers.
The downside:they’re like Delta pilots especially if they go long distance.
Small houses in every state!
Robert
October 9th, 2012
1:10 pm
@Disco – “will someone please hook a brother up”.
I am always searching for a new love. I am an equal opportunity lover and I do not discriminate. I love women in all colors, shapes and sizes. My Daddy told me a long time ago. He said “never turn down any woman. All women need love and happiness”
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
1:11 pm
Robert~ And men are different how?
You kill me with your cro-magnon values and then wonder why you ain’t got a woman. So, you gonna fill us in on what happened with bonita Benita? I noticed that you skipped over that question…
halo46
October 9th, 2012
1:18 pm
You guys are so right. I love a blue collar man, probably moreso than the professional men who don’t know how to let loose and have some fun. I knew he was blue collar working full time at UPS and part time at another blue collar job. He says he is also working on his BS in Management, finishing in February. The thing was the silver tooth and the skullie and unshaven. His pics showed him having all kinds of muscles, and i go for that. But, why brotha, didn’t you just clean up your act. I am now saying show up in a suit, but at least shave and show off that curly hair I saw in the professional photographs. He is still texting, and we may move into the friend zone. I may give him another chance to make a good impression. He seemed like a geniune brotha.
Robert
October 9th, 2012
1:21 pm
@common Cents – “So what happened with Benita”
She is still a good friend and I am very lucky to have known her. We had a great time together and I hope and pray one day she can trust me enough to leave our past in the past and move forward. She was afraid to love me as much as I loved her becuase she was afraid of getting her feelings hurt regardless of how much I loved and adored her. This is a good example of trying to undue your bad habits and how women will have a perception problem with your past life.
Leggs
October 9th, 2012
1:22 pm
Glad to read all that, Bluz. Now, stick to your guns and keep working on the re-wiring. Don’t short circuit yourself!!!
Ex~ Off topic: Were you able to get the Queen Albertina’ed this weekend? – Comon, now you know that’s going to take quite a few conversations. Suggesting it one time isn’t getting those lips cut!
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
1:23 pm
Ok. I am now thoroughly confused. Didn’t y’all just meet and hook up on the blog like 2 weeks ago?!? How could you be at the “She was afraid to love me as much as I loved her becuase she was afraid of getting her feelings hurt regardless of how much I loved and adored her.” phase that quickly?!? I call BS…
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
1:24 pm
Leggs~ With enough drinks it will…
That’s all it took for me. IJS
Leggs
October 9th, 2012
1:26 pm
“She just felt stupid sitting at the spot with her pageant dress on sitting across from a UPS man.” – Girl, you wrong for that. Still funny…
Comon Cents
October 9th, 2012
1:26 pm
halo~ I vote for a second chance. While you never get a second chance at a first impression, maybe he will come forward with some explanation for his appearance that first meeting. Maybe he’s like S/H and he looks at a blind date as not needing to bring his A game. Maybe he IS S/H…
I kid, I kid…
Leggs
October 9th, 2012
1:28 pm
What have I missed? S/H hooked up on the blog? Now the short-lived relationship is kaput???
Robert
October 9th, 2012
1:28 pm
@Common Cents –
We met In Jan 2012 and her name is not Benita. Perhaps you have me confused with someone else.
halo46
October 9th, 2012
1:32 pm
I had on jeans and a sweater. I threw on stilletos for the sex appeal, that’s all. I was thankful I didn’t wear the sweater dress with booties that I originally had on. See I knew I was going to meet a potential suitor, so I carefully considered what to wear. I would have just liked him to do the same.
SlimUno
October 9th, 2012
1:33 pm
I haven’t posted on here about him in a while. There has been some bs just at the friend level in the past month and I’m not having it anymore.
Bluz – I thought yall were good friends before dating attempt occurred. So what did he possibly do within the last month on a ‘friend level’ that ticked you off?
SlimUno
October 9th, 2012
1:39 pm
halo – You ever think that he was testing YO azz? POP QUIZ TIME
Robert
October 9th, 2012
1:40 pm
Laides I hate to bust your bubbles but most blue collar Men who work for UPS, FedEx, etc. are hired part-time. It takes years to make it a full-time job.
Exiled!
October 9th, 2012
1:41 pm
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