Temptation: Avoid or resist?
If you have a serious problem staying faithful to your significant other, how do you handle all the temptation that comes your way? I ask because my friend has a history of infidelity from his last marriage. He is just starting a new relationship and claims to have learned a lot from his divorce. Unfortunately, I see many of the same behaviors that led to his cheating in the past.
When it comes to temptation, is it better to avoid it all costs or find ways to resist it? I believe that a lot of people think they can handle flirting, number exchanges, or inappropriate conversations. The reality is, they don’t and it won’t be long before you are tempted…again.
If you are in a relationship, are you ever tempted to explore “extracurricular activities” with someone else? Have you ever been the person who tempted someone? What did/do you get out of it?
How do you handle temptation?
By Wise Diva, Misadventures in Atlanta Dating Blog
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134 comments Add your comment
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
6:46 am
Good Morning MIA~
Interesting Topic for this Terrific Thursday! Be Back Later!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
7:24 am
If you want to be faithful, temptation will not be a problem. No one can make you do something you don’t want to do, regardless of who they are!
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
7:28 am
Morning!!
Heading out soon to hit the road for the golf tourney. Working from home but I need to stop by the job. So, I’m up and online looking at emails early. Been IMing with a coworker
She’s in NC not heading anywhere so why is she up so early? lol
On topic: Each of us are human and not beyond falling into temptation. Temptations are around us everyday. Keep yourself away from situations where you know you’ll fall, grow weak or cannot endure. Not saying tuck tail, but knowing your limits and those things that will cause you to grow weak IMO is common sense. Too, always place yourself in the position of the person that will be hurt.
I’m sooooo trying not to turn the heat on yet. It’s chilly in here!
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
7:32 am
I don’t like bathing in the cold
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
7:34 am
Why do I have 56 emails before 8:00 am?
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
8:04 am
lol C~ pressing huh~
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
8:05 am
This topic makes me think of the Secret Garden song by the many old school r/b artists~
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
8:11 am
Yes honey…lol Alright, I’m heading out. Gotta get coffee and put something on my tummy..lol I’ll peek in later. Hold it down now!!
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
8:16 am
Temptation?
You can’t gouge the eyes,can you.
It’s hard!
Especially when you have a skewed women-men ratio.
The authorities need to legalize polygamy so we get over this damn one man, one woman monster.
Those with resources then get freed up to take on bigger responsibilities,and more enduring libidos (longevity,as uall say) etc.
Without that,some women are for ever going to be without and I don’t think God likes that!
So if a woman gets in where she can fit in,who can blame her,when her nether is feeling it?
The western world sells a monogamy lie,then we have the very rigid proponents of that lie stumbling…newt Gingrich,Eddie(even worse),Ted haggard,you name them…folks on the right!
You can’t blame the menfolk either.
Legalize it. Free the men!
Stay thirsty my friends.
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
8:47 am
Obama was a HUGE HUuuGe disappointment last nite.
No sugar coating it.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
9:02 am
If you want to be faithful, temptation will not be a problem. No one can make you do something you don’t want to do, regardless of who they are
SH – I think i’lll cosign this…not trying to toot my own horn but dudes try to hit on me often and it’s no thing to shoot down their advances before it even gets to a stage of be “TEMPTED” or having to decide over my mind and logic versus the CT in my pants.
Ex – I heard them discussing Obama on the radio this morning. The way they described him was as a chess player not a checker player. They believe that he was trying to keep cool to allow for Romney to expose his hand so that he could come back and use it in upcoming debates. Who knows…just a theory.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
9:07 am
Cel – You remind me of what my mom said her hubby told her once. He said, it’s best to prevent yourself from compromising sitautions because you never know what you’d do if your back is against the wall. He said he rather avoid any sticky sitatuations altogether because if you find yourself with a buck nekkid chick in front of you, you just might end up fugging her.
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
9:27 am
Morning All!!!
Slim, I heard the same assessment of the debate. That’s how he always plays it. Folks better recognize. Oh, and the fact-checkers are going crazy! All imma say about it!
On topic – Like Cel said, we are all human and have been tempted by something or someone at some point. The key is to recognize what your weaknesses are and manage them – not have someone manage them for you. If your relationship is important to you and you respect it, you will do what is necessary to preserve it. It’s not enough to give it lip service either. If you say you don’t want to cheat, yet keep putting yourself in compromising positions, well you guys know the rest……
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
9:34 am
Morning all!
I co-sign on S/H also. If you value your relationship, then you will avoid cheating. And beyond that, there are certain behaviors other than sex that are inappropriate if you are in a committed relationship. Furthermore, if you know you have the willpower of a six-year old, do not put yourself in a situation where you will be tempted. I know some folks that should just plain old be on a deserted same-sex island, lol. I don’t buy that “it just happened” or “it was a mistake” excuse. A person doesn’t just “happen” to slip & land in some puddy and there are plenty of moments at which you can extricate yourself from a situation before it goes too far; a conscious choice to do something is not a mistake; it is a choice.
O/T- Today is Thursday, otherwise known as Friday Eve. Where is five o’clock?
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
9:36 am
Slim..I hear u..but fact checkers are for the elite and folks who really read this stuff.
In front of millions I wld disagree with his consultant for playing safe. That gave the joker impetus to pounce….attack attack attack…and I was impressed with his defense.
Why not be hung HP and said ‘we killed Bin Laden period,Alq what their name is eviscerated in Afghanistan, why not said that blatant truth. ??
Ummm I’m not happy! And Iam a huge supporter
I wrote checks to this guy! So it’s not like..
Ok
Forget it
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
9:37 am
I wasn’t impressed with his defense(meantto say)
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
9:39 am
I guess the question that this topic raises for me is “Is emotional cheating the same as physical infidelity?” Many people are guilty of already committing the crime in their heart, even if they haven’t committed it with their body. Therefore, IMO, once a cheater always a cheater. And as my momma used to say, If he’d cheat with you then he’ll cheat on you.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:02 am
interesting CC~
Button
October 4th, 2012
10:05 am
Lead us not into temptation….
Temptation is all around, I’ve had times when I’ve gotten caught up and I have to remind myself that I’m not available.
How do you handle temptation? I think of my guy and what we’re headed towards.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
10:21 am
Lady~ Wouldn’t you say that Shawn is headed in this direction? While he says that he has not done the physical with little Miss Childhood Sweetheart, he is having lunches at her spot and draining bottles of wine with her. IMO, he has already cheated. He might as well go ahead and plow little Miss, because what he’s doing is actually worse. As a wife, I would be able to get past a physical relationship much faster than I could get past an emotional one. Physical weakness is weakness of the flesh. It happens. Emotional infidelity is symptomatic of a much bigger problem in the relationship IMO.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:25 am
yup more empathetic tied with long emotions of lust and fantasies of the “what if’s” or living for the moment without regard…..yup a bit clinical too but I digress
Button
October 4th, 2012
10:26 am
I agree @ Common Cents
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
10:27 am
Common- I agree with you on that being where Shawn is headed, but disagree that he should go ahead & plow her (although I think you were just joking there). Shawn- what say you???
Yes, emotional cheating hurts worse, but neither is okay, which is why it is better to avoid putting yourself in that situation in the first place. Whenever I would go out with my co-workers, I would let my ex know I was going rather than for someone to tell him I saw your wife with another guy. This way it is out in the open and known that it was a co-worker instead of some un-named male where my ex’s mind could wander. And he knew (or should have known) me well enough to know that I do not get my p & my paycheck in the same place. He didn’t subscribe to that philosophy, but still…..
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
10:28 am
Ex/kimmie – Blog monster ate my first post but I can’t believe I missed all the f-bombs that were dropped.
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
10:30 am
If you really care about someone, there should not be temptation to cheat. I told my ex that I would much rather him call me and break up before cheating on me. The problem with him is that he cheated with me over 10 years ago and I never trusted him 100%. I don’t think he cheated on me, but I may never know…
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
10:32 am
Absolutely gorgeous here!! Apparently we’re (blog folks) are the only ones that work. It’s packed here!
I pretty much agree with what everyone said on topic. Well, off to my post.
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
10:33 am
we are
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:34 am
enjoy c~
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
10:35 am
MsAtl~ I was being facetious about going ahead and plowing her, but you get the point. With what he’s doing, he has already committed the crime.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:35 am
I have finally caught up with all my work except one tasks plus a three day off weekend awaits! Can’t wait to close out tomorrow~
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
10:35 am
Thanks Lady!!
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
10:37 am
one last…someone is wearing Daisy Dukes!!
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
10:37 am
Bluz~ Can I ask you a question? (That’s rhetorical because I am going to ask anyway.) You can choose not to answer of course. But I am just curious, if he cheated WITH you why would you believe he didn’t cheat ON you? I have never understood women who cheat with a dude and then swear up and down it’s different when they’re with him.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:38 am
task
GlammourGirl
October 4th, 2012
10:42 am
Comon – You don’t think people can change? I have never been able to get past anyone cheating on me because the trust was gone. But I don’t necessarily think they’ll cheat on the other women they’re with for the rest of their lives.
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
10:46 am
CC – I guess I just thought that our love was different and he would never do that to me. It was so long ago that he cheated with me and I thought that he was reformed. I really don’t think he did cheat on me, although I’m sure he was tempted. Since I never found proof that he did, I will choose to believe that he did not.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
10:50 am
CC – I’m not sure if you’ve ever seen that show called Unfaithful. I believe it comes on the OWN network. But anyway, they said that 75% of relationships that start as affairs or from cheating fail.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
10:53 am
GG~ I think that most cheaters tend to be serial cheaters. There has to be something in you psychologically that would allow you to be a cheater in the first place. Without some counseling or some traumatic event that caused the pattern to change I don’t believe that the behavior will just “clear up on its own”.
Bluz~ When you cheated with him, did you guys get caught? If you didn’t, my question would be that even though you had no proof, how can you believe that he didn’t cheat on you?
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
10:55 am
Slim~ Exactly! No only that, but an affair creates an unrealistic environment for a relationship based on lies to grow. All of the day to day BS you put up with in a relationship, you don’t have in an affair. Cooking dinner, cleaning up after him/her, putting up with their mood swings, etc. The affair gets all the fun and the spouse gets all the work.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:57 am
chuckle cc~
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
10:57 am
potato soup for lunch~ yum brb
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
11:03 am
Bluz, yeah you told your ex that, but seriously? I also sat my ex down & explained that we got married young and that after all we had been through we could just divorce, remain friends and continue raising our children. I told him that if felt the urge to cheat (again) to let me know prior to doing it & I would be gone. Instead, he chose to have his Kate & Edith too. He cheated with several of his patients and attempted to hide the pregnant one by getting her a secret bank account & credit card. He had no intention of going anywhere. Of course I found out and was gone from there; now he mad!
Common- I won’t say that people absolutely can’t change, because I thought my ex would after counseling. However, with him, he was in counseling when he impregnated his patient and I believe he also cheated on her with another one while she was pregnant. While I refuse to say that no one can ever change, I will say that I am almost certain that my ex will not.
side bar- his mistress was also married. If both of you are married and cheating with each other, how can either of you be comfortable in the “relationship?”
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
11:06 am
CC – That’s exactly what happened in one of the stories. The guy started an affair with a chick from the strip club or ‘gentlemans club’ i should say lol. He ended up leaving his wife only after she had a PI follow him on all his out of town trips. Anyway, after he divorced his wife, he went on to try to make a relationship with the stripper lady but he said it totally changed being together all the time and said she couldn’t deal with the pressures of a real relationship. (basically what you said) The fantasy had worn off and reality set in so that eventually fell apart. I guess that’s why so many people cheat to get a break from the everyday stuff. Then after they get their fix, they hop back into reality mode.
DuShawn
October 4th, 2012
11:07 am
“emotional cheating”….lol, the female mind, you gotta love it. Only a woman thinks like this. Most men don’t “emotionally” cheat. Either we hittin it or we’re not.
”The affair gets all the fun and the spouse gets all the work…” That’s so true, but the flipside is that the mistress has no power. She accepts what she gets and is subject to an unceremonious dismissal at anytime.
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
11:08 am
CC – We did get caught. He and the girl he was with at the time had the bad habit of cheating on each other. She figured out pretty easily that he and I were hooking up. At the time, I thought they were broken up because that’s what he told everyone.
I have to believe that he did not cheat on me. I just have to…
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
11:11 am
Bluz, I will not interfere with your fantasy…
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
11:21 am
EMOTIONAL CHEATING 26 up, 3 down
An Act of Infidelity to gain an advantage over a partner that has formed trust or a commitment with cheater. Mostly going undetected by the uninvolved party and usually accomplished through lies of omission or commission. Typically, whether it is advertant or inadvertant, It can do emotional damage to the partner uninvolved. At times, more than physical cheating because sometimes physical cheating is just about the sexual relationship and not much else. emotional cheating is particularly hurtful because its two parties forming a bond that the uninvolved party don’t know about or may have been misrepresented.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=emotional+cheating
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
11:30 am
Cosign on MsAtl’s 11:11…
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
11:32 am
Shawn~ And that is why you see nothing wrong with what you’re doing. However, put the shoe on the other foot. Would you be staying with the wifey if she was off having long lunches and bottles of wine with the old sweetheart without your knowledge?
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
11:41 am
He may have cheated on me…but what I don’t know won’t hurt me!
If he did, I hope to NEVER find out!!!
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
11:41 am
Shawn – You may not be getting physical with her, but don’t feel that it’s wrong if you are doing something you can’t tell the wife?
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
11:52 am
“SCENARIO: LADIES, you and your S.O./SPOUSE have a dinner party. He has a female friend you have never met in attendance. She goes to make her own plate and BRINGS HIM A PLATE TOO. Is there anything wrong with this, in your HUMBLE opinion? What if the woman that was making your dude’s plate was a FAMILY MEMBER or better yet his MOTHER? Would it be an issue then? FELLAS, would you be upset if a DUDE made your S.O./WIFE’S plate, and brought it to her?” Thoughts?
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
11:53 am
Bluz~ Not to jump in for Shawn (but I am going to!) No, he doesn’t feel that it’s wrong because he rationalizes that he is sooo pimp, that if he DID tell her, it wouldn’t be a problem.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
11:55 am
Lady~ I think that if the woman bringing him the plate is a family member, it is very different than a woman who is his “friend”. I guess I have a different definition of friend too, because my SO should not have any female “friends” that he is close enough to that they would feel they needed to bring him a plate and I didn’t already know them. IJS…
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
11:57 am
CC – I would think it would still be a problem if he told the wife, but that would be up to her…
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
11:59 am
Lady – I’m gonna have to second what CC said…
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
12:02 pm
First, there shouldn’t be a dinner party where all unknowns aren’t introduced. Second, confidence and respect. Confidence in my relationship and my mate wouldn’t let me be upset. And respect wouldn’t let me take a plate from a man my mate doesn’t know. Think and act accordingly.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
12:03 pm
cool ladies~
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
12:03 pm
Lady- I would not have an issue if a female family member brought him a plate, but I would if it was a “friend,” especially since she would have to be familiar enough to know what he eats and does not eat. I realize that a man will have a life before me and I would not expect him to get rid of all of his female friends just because we are in a relationship, however, I firmly believe that any close opposite sex friend should be introduced to your s/o. I also do not believe that folks should go around collecting “new” opposite sex friends when they are married.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
12:07 pm
chuckle MsAtl~
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
12:10 pm
Lady~ You betta preach, girl! I like the way you put that!
MsAtl~ I have to cosign on the “new” opposite sex friends. That always seems suspect to me, especially as scandalous as women can be today!
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
12:11 pm
Anyone listen to the girl on the Bert Show this morning. I feel for her…after their “talk” last night, she is all excited and hopeful that things will work out when he seems to be on his way to breaking her heart again…
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
12:15 pm
Yeah, I listened. And my position is still the same as it was originally; you can’t fix stupid. And stupid is definitely the ability to believe that you are going to end up happily ever after even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary…
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
12:17 pm
I felt that way in the past about my ex, but after two years, I realized he would not give me what I want and need and let it go! I could NOT imagine waiting around for 9 years and then going backwards with slowing things down and just dating.
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
12:25 pm
What is the Bert show? I feel like I am missing out on something here.
OMG Common! re, your 12:10 on scandalous. I just had that conversation with a guy. He said that females here in ATL seem “hungry and desperate” and he feels like he has to fend them off. I know plenty of women who say they will trust a man before another woman. I hate to say it but women can be scandalous & nasty; no professional courtesy at all! Heck! Even men have a code; we just seem to have competition. It’s just sad that we do not look out for one another. If you step to me & I know you are married or involved, I am going to send you on your merry little way. If that was the normal standard then it would severely cut down on the pool of females available to cheat with. I am not your competition! I can complement another woman on her clothing, hair, kudos to career success, whatever. If you succeed it does not take anything away from me because I know who I am and my worth and I am secure in that.
(soap box back in corner).
Bluzgirl
October 4th, 2012
12:31 pm
MsAtl…the Bert Show is the morning radio show on Q100…
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
12:34 pm
MsAtl~ You are funny! I have said the same thing for years re: scandalous females. I swear some women just think it is ok to plow another woman’s garden. I am always amazed! And while I love and trust my hubs, I am not with some big toothed bimbo being all in his face cheesin’. Negative ghostrider!
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
12:36 pm
I just had that conversation with a guy. He said that females here in ATL seem “hungry and desperate” and he feels like he has to fend them off.
MsAtl – Do you really believe he has to “fend them off”? Is he really all that or is this just a figment of his imagination? And is desperation just an “Atlanta” thing?
DuShawn
October 4th, 2012
12:37 pm
It’s really not that serious, but for the sake of conversation and to make the blog participants day go by faster, I will speak on it. Yes, it is inappropriate for rekindle this friendship unbeknownst to wifey. If she did not know the history between us, I would introduce them.
-Commom- It’s not that I’m “so pimp”, I’m a true grown up, damn near an old man. I dun dun it all. In the past, if I met a woman that I thought was engaging and fun to hang out with, I would tell her she should meet my wife because they both have similar personalities. Occasionally, those introductions resulted in lasting friendships. Ironically, the sweetheart has expressed a desire to meet wifey if I thought it was cool, but that’s not gonna happen. My interest has already begun to diminish. My exit is inevitable. I’m just trying to decide should I leave her with a Santa Clause face on my way out (j/k…sorta).
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
12:38 pm
I feel the same way about folks knowingly hooking up with people that are already involved. I do not want to sign up to be your side piece. This right here does not come a la carte….entree only
abc
October 4th, 2012
12:38 pm
If temptation is present (for whatever reason and in whatever scenario) better to avoid it than to try to resist it, if that’s the question.
Romney clearly came out way ahead in last night’s debate. Another one of those will pretty much swing the thing toward the right.
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
12:43 pm
Y’all are waaaaay too funny…whew buddy!!! Gotta run
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
12:50 pm
I honestly feel that while Barack didn’t speak to some of the issues that could have been addressed, I feel he acted in a PRESIDENTIAL MANNER. Now you know if he would have started really ‘GOING IN’ on Romney, he would have been called the ‘ANGRY BLACK MAN’! What are your thoughts? Should he have really ‘SONNED’ Romney in your HUMBLE opinion?” Thoughts?
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
12:53 pm
Slim~ I like that. No a la carte~ entree only…
Celisea
October 4th, 2012
12:53 pm
Exactly Lady….danged if he does or doesn’t
bye!
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
1:05 pm
Common- “plow another woman’s garden” lol. Reminds me what’s the one thing in common a farmer and a pimp need to stay in business? ` hoes!
Kimmie-Yeah, he good, but I think he meant “fend” as in decline or refuse to give them his number. The word kind of brings to mind beating them off with a broom huh? Lol. No, desperation is not an ATL thing, but good grief I have seen some bold ones! A chick pushed her number in my nephew’s hand after he told her he was there with his pregnant fiancee and daughter. She told him “I don’t see no ring on your finger.” Uh, chick, he’s engaged not married; you wouldn’t! I gave that chick the serious side eye.
abc
October 4th, 2012
1:07 pm
An aggressive response would have been extremely stupid. He wasn’t very comfortable; he didn’t project himself very well; no great responses — in fact, starting off with avoiding the very first question Lehrer gave him was a huge mistake. Obama didn’t speak very well at all, which was a surprise.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
1:15 pm
Lehrer was a joke~ no control but anyway I am not undecided so to those who need to be convinced by the other dude with a debate shows where they really stand they ain’t feeling him either lol
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
1:16 pm
Matt Ryan has been named the NFC Offensive Player of the Month for the month of September!
Go Falcons!
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
1:20 pm
I have finished my major task buddy! yay!
Where is cba?!? Thanks again sir!!!!
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
1:23 pm
Yay, Matty Ice!!!!
Lady~ That is always the funny thing to me about Presidential debates. Realistically, those who watch them have already decided who they are voting for and the debate is not going to sway their decision. The swing voters rarely watch them. What’s the point?
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
1:23 pm
MsAtl – Yeah, I figured he meant it like that, refusing the number.
Your example about your nephew reminds me of an experience I had with an old boyfriend. We were leaving a nightclub and had to walk thru a thick crowd to get out. He was holding my hand as he led us out. As we were holding hands he was still getting hitting on by women and I was still getting hit on by men! They saw us holding hands!
I think a lot of people are still not used to women being the aggressor. Women are labled as desperate while a man in the same position is just doing what’s expected and being “persistent” and going for what he wants. Yet some criticize those women that are not comfortable approaching men first. Funny!
abc
October 4th, 2012
1:26 pm
Yeah well… like the last several Presidential elections, there doesn’t seem to really be a candidate to vote for, only ones to vote against, from where I sit.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
1:27 pm
kimmie~ I think there is a difference between merely approaching a man and some of the lengths that women seem to go through to attract a man’s attention here lately. They have gone way beyond merely “approaching”…
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
1:30 pm
abc~ agreed with your 1:26. I think it has come down to the lesser of two evils again…
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
1:33 pm
Comon – I agree. But it’s what some men have been doing all along.
Robert
October 4th, 2012
1:36 pm
“How do you handle temptation?”
Whenever I step outside of my home I struggle with “temptation” everyday. For example doing routine tasks such as going to the gas station, grocery store, Church or at a traffic light going to work I find temptation everywhere I go. I realize I am “addicted” to women and I struggle to stay “sober” daily. I wonder how many men are “addicted” to women?
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
1:39 pm
interesting dialogue~ nothing new huh~ lol
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
1:43 pm
Lady – Nothing new at all!
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:00 pm
Robert~ We don’t call that addicted; we call that greedy.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
2:01 pm
PSA: I do not argue with ignorance. Some people are so extreme in their beliefs that they truly that assume insulting others will produce conformity. Yeah ummm…not for me. It’s a shame that you can’t turn your negative into a positive because of your way of thinking. I simply pray for people like you. Your life has got to be miserable when all you see and think is negative.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:02 pm
sidebar~ I do love the fact that women have reached the point where they are becoming more like men in the sense that they don’t assume that sex=relationship.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:03 pm
Lady~ ???
DuShawn
October 4th, 2012
2:04 pm
-Robert- I feel you. In Atlanta, there are beautiful women everywhere you look. I too am a recovery addict. As a man, one has to eventually evolve to the point where you can enjoy a woman’s beauty without having to partake. I met some friends in New Orleans for the essence festival a few months ago.
Awsome, is too weak of a word to describe all those gorgeous women. My potnah made a comment that I was not the hunter I once was. I replied, I’m harmless these days, I just want to watch them walk by!
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
2:05 pm
random vent cc just amazing sometimes reading between the lines~ #gofigure
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:08 pm
Gotcha, Lady!
Robert & Shawn~ You act like only men feel that way. I love to look at a nice, handsome well groomed good smelling man. In fact, I commented about one that I saw on the elevator in my building a few weeks ago. However, it goes no further than that because I would NEVER want to jeopardize what is true for what is a fleeting moment of desire.
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
2:11 pm
U guys still on cheating:
Anyway u know a heffa is trying to get in where she thinks she fits when she asks about your kids but not your wife.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:14 pm
Ex~ TURTH!!! Or the lady who is always in his face asking how his job is going. How his kids are, etc, but NEVER asks about the wife and will cut the conversation short real quick if he says “My wife and I so and so…”
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:15 pm
comon you mean you didn’t you a lil of that (LOL)
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
2:18 pm
Common?
can we have a sidebar about your sidebar?
We don’t have to kiss!
Robert
October 4th, 2012
2:19 pm
“I wonder how many men are “addicted” to women?”
This is a very serious problem. People are addicted to a lot of things such as sugar, alcohol, food, sex and anything that gives the mind and/or body feelings of pleasure. For example a “fat” person has a problem avoiding the “temptation” to eat food especially during the holiday’s, an alcoholic avoiding traditional holiday drinks (eggnog, etc.) out of fear of having a relapse and a diabetic person avoiding cakes and pies and other sugar treats. During this time of year I meet many women through family & friends, office parties and other (golf, football/basketball games, concerts/plays, etc.) events. I would be lying if I said I was not “tempted” to share a sexual moment with an attractive,desirable and available woman. Just like any other “addict” my drug of choice is women.
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
2:19 pm
Comon – Yeah, I see nice eye candy every day. So I see a good-looking dude, I’m not blind. Whatever. Don’t feel I gotta jump on or even speak to said dude. Note his handsomeness in my head and keep moving! Not that hard.
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:25 pm
Robert everything you named except diabetes is a choice, if you want to do them, do them, but don’t blame them on temptation. Because it is so easy to just walk away.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
2:28 pm
addiction is the ongoing theme~ duly noted
Robert
October 4th, 2012
2:31 pm
@Single and Happier – “Because it is so easy to just walk away.”
Yes, it is easy for a woman to walk away, BUT a man does not think or act like a woman. Real Men are “predators” looking for “prey” and always looking for the thrill or score just like an “addict”.
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
2:32 pm
When you’re young you find yourself chasing illusions, but once you get some age on you just to find and hold on to something real. <<<<<or vice versa?!? hmmmmmm lol #random
Lady~sharpness is > than smartness
October 4th, 2012
2:33 pm
Robert you are so amusing I just LOL~
Okay good people enjoy the funnies and let me skip to my lou~ #igetitclearly ha! peace!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:34 pm
Robert, it’s a good thing you don’t speak for every man. Just like all addictions, it’s a sign of weakness.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:35 pm
A sidebar about my sidebar? Obviously, you didn’t read my 2:08.
S/H~ I never had that problem.
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:38 pm
Good thing you’re not a man comon (rotflmao) you wouldn’t be able to say no. (LOL)
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
2:42 pm
My ex was addicted to women and puddy
Robert
October 4th, 2012
2:43 pm
@Single and Happier – I hope my testimony will help someone who is struggling with “temptation” in their relationship. Everybody has some weaknesses and need help. No I do not speak for every man and I hope if any man is having feelings of “temptation” to examine his self and seek professional counseling especially if his relationship is at risk because of “temptation”.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:44 pm
LMAO! S/H~ The problem with Robert’s argument, is that all of the other things he listed as addictions have physical side affects. (In fact, with drinking and drugs, withdrawing too quickly can kill you!) Somehow, while you uys may have had some killer puddy, I don’t recollect ever hearing of anyone dying from lack of puddy. IJS.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:46 pm
Slim~ Had he only been addicted to your puddy, no problem!
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:49 pm
Comon to me, and I only speak for me, we love to hide behind addictions, temptations, and any other excuse we can use. If you want to have many women, have them, why is this so wrong! Just make sure they know it and can do the same.
You may not die from a lack of puddy, but getting caught can have some serious side effects, (bobett) (LOL)
I’m no saint, I’ve cheated, and I’ve been faithful, didn’t need an excuse to do either.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
2:53 pm
Had he only been addicted to your puddy, no problem
CC – The double whammy was he was addicted to mine as well
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:54 pm
And there you have it…
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
2:54 pm
awww slim got that addictive love (LOL)
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
2:55 pm
Slim~ Well, I guess that sucks for him then. ave lots or puddy and be addicted to it all or have your favorite puddy but no other puddy…. Hmmmm
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
3:03 pm
SH – Well, if you break it down, I would not say that mine is addictive as much as he just had/has a problem period. I got a clearer idea of who he really was after we broke up. Like an idiot, he was posting stuff on twitter about his litle rendevous or what not…He hosted something called Freak Fest and I’m scared to know what went on there. He also was messing with several married chicks…involved himself in lesbian threesomes etc…
For Real
October 4th, 2012
3:04 pm
What up Blog Fam!
Tempation is all around us and it will never ever go away. Everyone on this planet will be tempeted but you don’t have to act.
O/T Obama was playing it close to the vest or else be called an angry black man. In the words of Paul Mooney “if a black man ain’t grinning from ear to ear and waving magic hands then he is angry.”
I believe we have become to loose with the definition of addictions. Here is my definition of Addiction: If you ain’t willing to kill yourself for it then it ain’t an addiction. You are just one weak minded individual looking to excuse your behavior.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
3:08 pm
For Real
October 4th, 2012
3:13 pm
Oh make no mistake about it… The Puddy be calling us but that why you got to put your hands to your ears and go LALALALALALALALALLALAALLALALALA!!!!!
kimmie
October 4th, 2012
3:13 pm
4 Real – Do you watch Dexter?
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
3:18 pm
For Real – You ever seen that movie “Idle Hands”…buddy would wake up with blood on his hands and not have any recollection of what had happened the previous night???? Well, somma yall act like you have the IDLE PENIS SYNDROME…wack up with some other chicks dried up juices on your wang and claim you don’t remember or you were so clumsy that you just fell in
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
3:23 pm
For real, to me it’s a problem when you start lumping diseases in with addictions. Helping to make the excuse even more.
MsAtl
October 4th, 2012
3:31 pm
Slim- were you dating my ex? I kid! I kid! Just that he also was posting stuff on Twitter about his affair and baby. His very first tweet was that he was going to start posting & he dared anyone to put him on blast. Well he put himself on blast because the investigator that took his license for messing with a patient had his twitter page printout as proof of the affair and the baby and the patient was responding to the tweets on his page with her real name. As one of you said before, if only there was a way to plead stupidity! And your “idle penis” remark!- bwahahaha.
For Real- I agree with you on the addiction thing; it is often an excuse and a poor one at that.
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
3:41 pm
Slim you know addicts have to have more than one dealer.
SlimUno
October 4th, 2012
3:45 pm
SH – Yeah, I guess you have a good point there. But with that said, if you have that kind of issue, why try to maintain a relationship with someone that obviously wants to be monogamous…just stay single hanging out in adult chat rooms, swingers clubs, skrip clubs etc. Don’t come round my way with all that foolishness. I have a heart and don’t take too lightly to one wiping their leftover cheating puddy juice all over it.
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
3:51 pm
Slim~ You are in rare form today, hon! Idle Penis Syndrome? Wiping leftover puddy juice on it?
ROTFLMAO!!! 
Comon Cents
October 4th, 2012
3:52 pm
MsAtl~ If it wasn’t your ex, It might have been the first ex-Mrs. Cents.
Single and Happier "Life Happens!"
October 4th, 2012
4:04 pm
Slim, that’s just one I can’t answer, never understood it either.
Exiled!
October 4th, 2012
4:09 pm
For Real?
Some erections have been known to kill..
I ain’t no biologist but if blood is gushing more to one area of the body,incessantly and continoudl 24/7..,,….
Houston somebody might die!
But on balance I prefer an erection than No erection.
Eyeing Fine five star ranked mignon steak on a platter when u don’t have teef must be real painful!
Ijs
For Real
October 4th, 2012
4:22 pm
Kimmie: yeah i seen dexter but I just can’t get with the storyline. I found myself calling BS alot tho.
Slim: IDLE PENIS SYNDROME now that’s a real sickness that been proven by NASA. For Real now using alcohol swabs on his wang.
Ex: Yes they have but that condition is PHETCD aka Penis Hard Enough To Cut Diamonds syndrome and yes it has killed before but the major side effect is slapping the ish out of a chick cause she said no when PHETCD has set in.